Author has written 7 stories for Dragon Ball Z, Harry Potter, Ninja Turtles, Supernatural, Hobbit, and Percy Jackson and the Olympians. My name is Katelyn. I am 14, have a very unhealthy-to some-obsession with coffee, Percy Jackson, Harry Potter, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Dragon Ball Z, Kane Chronicles, and whatever else flys my fancy. I also have the habit of laughing, crying or anything else when I read a story that induces these reactions, talk to myself, and act out the scene I happen to write. Hell, sometime I even rub my hands together an get the mad scientist laugh going! But, whenever I do that, the person who happens to be in earshot would give me a look... Looks exactly like the one your giving me now. I'm pretty sure they were too afraid to ask. And I'm assuming you are too Also, has any else noticed that everything is hilarious at seven in the morning when you haven't slept? I have. Things I Like: -Chocolate...mmmmm :) -White Chocolate -Coffee. The sweet, blessed elixir...Don't look at me like that! You better not diss it, or bad things will happen! -Same As It Never Was AU fan-fiction. Awesome episode! But, I have a problem with how Donny reacted. I mean, Donny was a teenager! Did they forget that?! Grrrrr! -Good OC fan-fiction. See the emphasis on good? -Nico. He's the son of my favorite god. -Vegeta. I have a thing for bad boys... -Raph. Read the one above. -Donny. So...I like smart people.*Smiles sheepishly*I like it when a person understands what I'm saying. Besides, he's a sweetheart! -Goku. He so adorable, I just want to eat him up! -Rise of the Guardians. One of the best movies. EVER! -There's more, but I'm lazy. ;) Things That Make Me To Want To Go Get My Trusty Friend, The Sledge Hammer: -Chaos fan-fics. Annabeth would never cheat on Percy! -People who flame just to flame. Speaking of you people, I have one thing to say to you. DON'T LIKE DONT READ! That clear enough?! -People who shove their beliefs in other peoples faces. Do you know how hard I have to try to hold my self back from saying something particularly unpleasant when I see that? On second thought you don't need to know. -Fan-fics that portray Donny has weak. He is not! He just prefers to ask questions first over rushing into a fight without knowing a good reason for it. -Yamcha. I don't know what is, but something just urges me to hit something when I hear his voice. -People who think woman are weak. We are just more sensitive to things then men. After all, as a wise old mutant rat once stated "There is not a monster more dangerous than a lack of compassion." -There is probably more, but remember! I am lazy! Favorite, Quotes, Sayings and All That Jazz... "With great power. . . .comes the great need to take a nap. Wake me later"-Nico (TLO) "T.M.N.T! WHATCHA YOU GET IS WHAT YOU SEE! You know, your just embarrassing yourself"-Mikey&Raph (2k3) "Sometimes it's good to be a turtle...and sometimes it's good to be a short turtle."-Raph(2k12) "There is a saying. He who runs his mouth gets a face full of nunchaku." "They say that in Japan?" "No, but they would if you were there"-Splinter&Leo(2k12 " Yes...You did it again! WHY DO YOU KEEP GRABBING MY FACE?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY FACE!?"-Donnie(2k12) "You did save our lives, Mikey. But you also used my favorite comic as TOILET PAPER!"-Leo(2k12) "Raph, if you keep breaking your toys, we won't buy you new ones."-Leo(2k12) My Works of Art(Hopefully Someone Thinks So...) A Spider's Thread- Coming along nicely and updating regularly. This might have something to do with my latest obsession of Ninja Turtles... My Life As Sheila:The Sister of Goku- Updating when I can. Having a bit of trouble with chapter 11. But I will never abandon! EVER!! Gohan and Cell Battle In The Past- This story is coming slowly, since I kinda put it on the back burner. The Reason Nico Di Angelo Is At Hogwarts- To be honest, I only started this story because I couldn't get the idea out of my brain. Might have to discontinue or put up for adoption... Fanfiction is what literature might look like if it were reinvented from scratch after a nuclear apocalypse by a band of brilliant pop-culture junkies trapped in a sealed bunker. They don't do it for money. That's not what it's about. The writers write it and put it up online just for the satisfaction. They're fans, but they're not silent, couchbound consumers of media. The culture talks to them, and they talk back to the culture in its own language. —Lev Grossman, TIME, July 18, 2011 Copy and paste it if you agree with the story below. Please do not change any details, no matter if you're offended. Also, add your name. -NinjagoZ, SupeyNinjaZora19, ForeverDreamer12, TechnoGirl317, NicoDiAngelo234 There was a girl in her kindergarten class. She had brown hair and blue eyes, and she was friends with a lot of people. Then, she told her friends something. "I'm an Aetheist." She told them. One of the boys wrinkled their nose. All of her friends got quiet and stopped talking to her. So, she lied to everyone, told them she was kidding. For 3 grades after, she lied to everyone, saying she was a Christian. Later, in fourth grade at a Christian school in Florida, she was with her best friend, who she called Kris. When she was comfortable with her best friend, she smiled at Kris. The girl looked her friend in the eye. The girl asks, "Can you keep a secret?" "Of course!" Kris smiles. The girl leans in close, and whispers, "I don't believe in God." Kris nods, and the next day, the girl came to school. She was confronted before class in the courtyard by a blonde girl who I'll call Dess. I am not at liberty to expose her name. Dess got in the girl's face. Dess demands, "Why don't you believe in God?" The girl responds, "I just don't understand religion." "Well, that makes you a freak." Dess informs her. Her two friends, who were taller than that young aethiest, laughed. The girl only associated with two boys called "Cameron" and "Cyril", who didn't care whether she was a Christian or not. She never regained any of her self-esteem, because she used to sing for everyone, and dance without shame, and laugh at the boy jokes. She always kept to her books, and drawings, and was rarely speaking until it was the day she left. Now she is in 5th grade. She was now a Ninjago nerd, and only hung out with a few people. She never mentioned her religion to anyone, because she didn't want to lie. One of her best friends smiled, and leaned in close. "I need to tell you something!" He declared. The girl nodded, expecting to hear something she couldn't relate to. One of her best friends other than him wore a cross, and another had drawings of them on his binder. The best friend admits, "I'm an Aetheist." This warmed this girl to the heart, though she gets no confidence back. In 6th grade, she decides that she will be in the talent show in 7th grade since nobody teases her if they don't know, regaining some of her old confidence. That girl is me, NinjagoZ. TO ALL OF YOU POPULAR GIRLS You may wear yoga pants, but I wear ripped jeans. You may wear uggs and vans, I wear combat boots and converse. You wear jewelry and makeup, I wear sweat and pride. You get invited to every single party with out trying, but I'd be lucky to get invited to one. You have tons of fake friends, but I have a few true friends. You watch girly shows, but I watch shows made for 8 year old boys. Your a scholar, I'm an athlete. When you do something important everyone notices, but when I do something important no one cares. Your boys may be British, but mine are ninjas. You may be a pegasister, but I'm a genuine shell head. So you and your fake friends can go and turn heads, if you need us, me and my girls will be breaking necks. And the list goes on forever. Nobody should be afraid to be who you are, and the ones who act different to please others make fun of us for being different. Well, don't be surprised when you see me and my friends making fun of you all for being the same. If you're any thing like me copy and paste this to your profile tmntgirl124, TechnoGirl317, NicoDiAngelo234 The Percy Jackson Pledge: I promise to remember Percy Whenever I'm at sea I promise to remember Annabeth Whenever a spider comes at me I promise to protect nature For Grover's sake of course I promise to remember Luke When my heart fills with remorse I promise to remember Chiron Whenever I see a sign that says ''Free Pony Ride'' I promise to remember Tyson Whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side I promise to remember Thalia Whenever a friend is scared of heights I promise to remember Clarisse Whenever I see someone that gives me a fright I promise to remember Bianca Whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother I promise to remember Nico Whenever I see someone who doesn't get along with others I promise to remember Zoe Whenever I watch the stars I promise to remember Rachel Whenever a limo passes my car. I promise to remember The Stolls when my home is beginning to unsettle. I promise to remember Bekendorf whenever I see someone working metal. I promise to remember Silena whenever a friend takes one for the team I promise to remember Michael Yew whenever I see a smile that gleams. I promise to remember Briares whenever I see someone playing hand games. I promise to remember those lost in the Battle of the Labyrinth whenever I see a cloth in flames. I promise to remember those campers who fought against Kronos whenever I see someone go against the odds. Yes I promise to remember PJO Wherever I may go PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile! NORMAL PEOPLE: Rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast PJO FANS: Will tell Zeus to make it rain NORMAL PEOPLE: Say OMG! PJO FANS: Say OH MY GODS! NORMAL PEOPLE: Go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings PJO FANS: Won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers NORMAL PEOPLE: Say shut up or i'll tell on you! PJO FANS: Say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you! NORMAL PEOPLE: Think that PJO fans are stupid PJO FANS: Know that normal people are stupid NORMAL PEOPLE: When being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY! PJO FANS: When being chased use their demigod powers NORMAL PEOPLE: Get nervous/scared during thunderstorms PJO FANS: Yell at Zeus to calm down NORMAL PEOPLE: Would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation PJO FANS: Would try and find Camp Half Blood NORMAL PEOPLE: Don't have this on their profile PJO FANS: Would have this on their profile already 1. If you could hang out anywhere in Camp Half-Blood, where would it be? My Answer: The woods or the arena(FIGHTING STUFF) 2. Which PJatO Character Would You Date? My Answer: Nico, he's awesome, funny, and closest in age to me 3. Which PJatO Character Is Your Best Friend? My Answer: Annabeth,Thalia or Clarisse 4. Which PJatO Character Do You Hate? My Answer: Don't be a hater! 5. Your Favorite PJatO book? My Answer: Titan's curse 6. Your Favorite PJatO Character? My Answer: Thalia and Nico(such badasses) 7. Favorite God or Goddess? My Answer: Hades 8. Percy walks up to you, what do you do? My Answer: Hug him 9. You just got 2 tickets to go see a concert, who do you take with you? My Answer: Nico or Thalia, they probably likes the same music as me 10. You accidentally got stranded on a deserted island...who got stranded with you? My Answer: Nico 11. Hermes asked you to help him repopulate Olympus...what is your answer to this disturbing question? My Answer: Creeper! I'm too young! AAAAAAAaaaah 12. Favorite PJatO Pairing? My Answer: Thalico 13. You and the Big Three are on Olympus...?? My Answer: Say hi. Tell Hades I love his son! Try not to die 14. If you could spend your Friday Nights doing something, what would it be? My Answer: Spending time with Nico 15. Favorite PJatO Quote? My Answer: "With great power... comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later." - Nico di Angelo 16. Favorite Percy Moment? My Answer: In Titan's curse when Thalia said Apollo was hot (which he is) and Percy was like "Well, yeah he's the sun god" 17. Favorite Nico Moment? My Answer: When he says, "With great power, comes a great need to take a nap. Wake me up later." It's my favorite quote! Though any moment with Nico is a good one! 18. Favorite god or goddess Moment? My Answer: Anyone with Apollo 19. Favorite Grover Moment? My Answer: I don't know... 20. Favorite Random Moment? My Answer: That would be a very long list. I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat. This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia D* put this R* on your E* page if you A* prefer your M* imagination S* over reality If you ever wished you could live in a story, copy and paste this to your profile. If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away and remembered copy this into your profile. Chocolate is YUMMY! If you are a chocoholic, copy and paste this to your profile. If you get way to excited for books, movies, ect. to come out, copy this into your profile. NORMAL PEOPLE/HTTYD FANS: NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG! NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you! NORMAL PEOPLE: think that HTTYD fans are crazy NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY! NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation NORMAL PEOPLE:don't have this on their profile If you sit in your car waiting for the song you love to be over, then leave... If someone tells you "don't look now", but you do anyway... If you believe that the saying "Sometimes the brightest smile hides the deepest pain" is true... If you love waking up in the middle of the night, and realizing you have more time to sleep... If you hate waking up from a good dream and it won't come back... If your headphones are ALWAYS tangled... If slow computers drive you CRAZY... If you love laughing until it hurts and you can't breathe... If you used to blow into video games and it actually made them work... If you use your cell phone to see in the dark... If you can't help but find everything hilarious at 4 AM... If you think those 5 extra minutes of sleep really make a difference... If your fridge has NOTHING in it to eat, no matter how full it is... If all those years you watched Blues Clues, you never realized Blue was a GIRL... If you can't stand to hear your own voice in videos or recordings... If you pull out your phone and pretend to text in awkward situations... If you check behind the shower curtain for murderers before getting in... If you love people who text back instantly... If you stand in the shower for ages because the hot water feels soooo good... If you really wish you could record your dreams and watch them later... If you don't consider people who have only seen the movies to be "real" Harry Potter fans... If you wish music played during epic moments in your life, like in movies... If you hate getting out of the shower and it's FREEZING... If you walk a little faster when you see a creepy van... If you hate how the best part of your dream is always right about to happen when you wake up... If you haven't lost it... you just... haven't found it yet... If you and your best friend can say one word and almost die from laughing hysterically... If you have to try SO hard not to laugh when you're getting scolded... If you and your best friend could sit down next to each other, not say a single word, and walk away feeling as if it was the greatest conversation ever... If you stop the microwave before it hits 0:00 to avoid hearing the loud BEEPs... If you know because everyone's house has a different smell that yours must have one. But you still can't smell it!... If you have to say the entire alphabet out loud because you can't remember what letter comes next... If you get paranoid because the spider you saw five seconds ago isn't there anymore... If you hate it when you think of a really good comeback after the argument... If you love it when teachers get off track and tell you stories about their life... If your favorite song always seems to come on right as you pull into your driveway... If you mentally say "Wed-nes-day" when writing the word "Wednesday"... If you used to climb on furniture and pretend the floor was lava... If you want to STRANGLE that kid who reminds the teacher about homework and quizzes... If you were first in Mario Kart, you fell off a cliff, and then you were... last... If whenever someone says 'I like your shirt', you look down to see what you're wearing... If you look down at your cell phone when you're walking past someone you want to avoid... If you told the person who called you a name "Words can cut deeper than a sharpened sword, and be just as deadly"... If you would fit into all the universes of cartoons, animes, and books that you read and watch better than at school or home... If you cried watching season 1 episode 26 of the 2012 teenage mutant ninja turtles... If you hate when teachers say "From all the talking, I assume everyone is done."... If you have dropped your phone on your face while laying down texting... If once you turn off all the lights in the basement you run the heck out of there... If you feel like a ninja whenever you drop something and catch it... Then you are the best kind of human there is, and we should be related If you are insane and proud of it, copy this into your profile. If you've ever looked for something that was in your hand or right in front of you, copy and paste this in your profile. If you think the school week is way too long and weekends are way too short, copy this onto your profile. If you've ever felt like someone(thing) was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile If you are wondering what it would be like to have wings, copy and paste this into your profile If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile. If you're part of the .0000000001 percent of people who does NOT have a MySpace, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you believe in doing what you love, no matter what other people might think, copy and paste this into your profile. If you love wolves, copy and paste this to your profile PLEASE READ. I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' "OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!'' "I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it like it didn't touch your heart. I am that girl, The one who likes books more than boys. The one who pretends not to be sad, just to make others happy The one who always wonders what she did wrong The one who writes to escape The one who just wants to help The one that really wants to make a difference The one that sticks to her values The one that refuses to believe that this is it The one that will do anything to make a better tomorrow The one who won't give in The one won't give up - by Ravenhearst, copy and paste if you can relate to this. If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or visa versa copy this into your profile Do you know that the average American reads only three books a year? If you believe that it's not possible to read so little, copy this into your profile. If you have ever gone a REALLY long time without blinking copy this on your profile (there was a statue of an angel nearby. Hint hint whovian hint hint) The other day in class, my teacher was telling us about something I can't remember, when I suddenly remember that I needed a paper out of my binder. So I lean over my desk and got it out and I was zipping the binder up really slow trying to be quiet. Once I closed it I turned around and saw every one in the room staring at me, even the teacher. So, I cock my head to the side and ask "What?". Then jumped when every one burst out laughing, including the teacher. When I asked what they were laughing about, my teacher just waved her hand at me and said nothing. So I sat there totally confused while everyone around me laughed. Copy and paste this on your profile if this has ever happened to you From Of Broken Bones and Flavored Chalk by IvoryDrum Raph: (to Don about Leo): Well then instead of gettin' all worked up about it, why don'tcha jus' go strap 'im to his futon an' tell 'im ta stay? Don: If you don't start taking those vitamins, I'll be forced to start giving you shots instead. Raph: Not gonna happen. Don: And if I find any in the trash, you can kiss the upgrades to your Shell Cycle goodbye! Raph: But that's not fair! How would ya even know they were mine? Don: What do you mean how would I even know they were yours? Raph: I mean, we all throw ours away, 'ceptfor Splinter. Don: …What? Raph: You know what those things taste like, Donnie? Shit flavored chalk. That's what. Nothin' tropical fruity about 'em. I took one and I think it almost killed me. (pauses) Have your eyes always twitched like that? Don: Raph? Raph: Yeah bro? Don: After I finish tying Leo to his bed, I'm coming for you. Raph: Don, if you come within twen'y feet of me with rope in your hand, I will hog-tie your death-wishin' shell to your bo and hang you off of one of the pipes in the dojo You know you are a fan of TMNT when...Ok I haven't done the last one YET! - when your teacher is talking about ancient Japan you constantly are comparing one thing to something in the show. - when you avoid a paper shredder... you never know if Ch'rell is in there. - when people walk by you think to yourself 'I wonder if that person is an utrom' - when you expect to hear about the nightwatcher on the news. - when you get down on your knees and BEG your mom to buy you four pet turtles and a pet rat and when she asks what you would do with them, you would reply 'so I can locate the nearest TCRI building, grab some ooze and avenge master Yoshi.'... Yeah, I still gotta do that! From The Leaning Tower of Pizzaby AlyssaFelixa Mike: Hey, Don-man. What's up? Don: (sleepily) Coffee. Mike: Look what I'm making. Don: Coffee. Mike: You really are still asleep, aren't you? Don: Coffee. Mike: (standing up) What's the secret of life? Don: Coffee. Mike: What comes out of a horse's butt? Don: Coffee. Mike: Who's the current president of the US? Don: Coffee. Mike: What's not coffee? Don: Coffee. Mike: (sitting down) Alright, I've had my fun. Raph: (to Mike and Don) I don't know what happened. And I don't wanna. All I know is if after I've had my shower, I still gotta wade through - what is that, tomato sauce? – ter get ter da fridge, I'm gonna break someone's face There's that strange girl in the background that you see everywhere. She doesn't talk to a lot of people, she's not the prettiest girl there, and she's always got a book or notebook. She won't talk because she's too shy. She's shy because nearly everyone's she's tried to be friends with has rejected or hurt her. She prefers a book because good always wins and she writes because those are the only happy endings she ever sees. I'm one of those strange girls. Repost this if you are one too and add your name to the list. That way all those "strange girls" can see that they are not so strange, or alone. Originally by Lady Firewing Wolf skater. Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent that aren't, copy this, put it in you profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, Weasel Chick, Revenant666, dragonsroar, foxdude33, FallenLex, Soelle, Akihiro Asamoto, Corvin, 9tail_Naruto, FlameKaiser, NoNameNeeded, Kyuuki-sama, Seraph of Shadows, emperor-soul heroforlife, Another Dead Hero, The Jonny T Factor, Whitechocolate14, Louisiana-gal2, Wolf skater, YAY Productions, NicoDiAngelo234 Newscasters are the people who tell you "Good evening" and then proceed to tell you why it's not. I live in my own little world. But that's okay; they know me there. If you can't convince them, confuse them If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk. Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible? If your heart was really broken you'd be dead, so shut up. You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same. Don't make me mad... I'm known to bite at random Most teachers promote the three R's; Reading, 'Riting, and 'Rithmetic. Then there are those that promote three S's; Sit down, Shut up, and STOP DRIVING ME CRAZY!! Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon. I didn't invent sarcasm, but I perfected it If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. If you can't join 'em, bribe 'em. If you can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em. If you can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em. If you can't kill 'em, you're screwed. When your bored and want something to do, open your text book and start writing, "Terrorist attack at 3:00 AM" on all the pages, then give it to a cop. When he asks who wrote this, say your teachers name and take him to the school. When your teacher tells you to solve a problem on the board, go up there and start writing her life story. Note to self: It is illegal to stab people for being stupid. Don't upset me, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies. Smile. It scares people. What does not kill me had better run pretty darn fast! yeah, I'm crazy, it runs in the family, what's your excuse? you sound almost chipper. What happened today - you run over a small child or something? There are very few problems that can not be solved using a large amount of explosives I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away If you laugh I will laugh If you cry I will cry and if you jump out a window I will laugh harder If it starts actually raining cats and dogs, don't go outside (the answering machine) Hi. I am probably home. I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you Hi, this is the refrigerator. John's answering machine is broken but i'll give the message to John. Now just speak very slowly while i write down the message and stick it to myself with these little cute magnets I'm out of my mind! but feel free to leave me a message (end answering machine) My doctor asked if any members of my family suffered from insanity, I replied, no, we all seem to enjoy it Just remember, everything happens for a reason. So when I smack you upside the head, remember... I had a reason! Whatever it is, I didn't do it. Unless I was supposed to do it, in which case I did it brilliantly Bleach and latex gloves: $10... Plastic wrap, trash bags and duct tape: $ 20...Chainsaw: $200 The Horrified look on the cashiers face: PRICELESS! I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it A friend would help you up when you trip and fall. A best friend would laugh, trip you again, then laugh some more!(: Instead of a sign that says "Do Not Disturb" I need one that says "Already Disturbed Proceed With Caution." I don't know about you, but a highlight of my childhood was talking into the fan to hear my robot voice I couldn't ask for better friends. I could ask for normal friends, but where's the fun in that?! My mission is accomplished. I ran down the street, threw skittles at people, said "TASTE THE FRIKKEN RAINBOW!" so it was a good day I am so talented I can fall up the stairs, trip on flat surfaces, and get hit by a parked car. Aren't I just amazing? :) sometimes I just want to run up to a stranger on the street and say 'YOU'RE IT!!' and then run away I wonder if anyone else has road rage when pushing a cart through the aisles at Wal-Mart? The 12-step chocoholics program: NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE! Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with! Who ever said that words don't hurt never got hit by a dictionary I have the kind of friends that if my house was burning down, they'd be there making S'mores and hitting on hot firemen Sarcastic?! ME?! Never! Sometimes I wonder, 'Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?'... then it hits me Friends ask why you're crying...Best friends already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry Sarcasm is not a free service I offer...It's a personality trait I'm smiling. That alone should scare you I'm that type of girl that makes the devil go "oh crap, she's up!" when my feet hit the floor in the morning Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional What you're looking for is always in the last place you look..." Well, DUH, smart one! After you find it, you stop looking!" When life gives you lemons, Throw them back and yell "I want oranges" If a turtle is missing its shell is it homeless or naked? here's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird The voices and I took a vote, and your insane (On a T-Shirt) Who are you, and why are you reading my shirt? Normal people worry me. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. People say that I have totally lost it. I wasn't even aware I had it. My friend text-ed me asking "what does 'idk' mean?" so I said "I don't know" and she said "omg! NO one knows!" I'm that type of girl who walks into chairs and says sorry If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried "If all your friends were jumping off a cliff would you jump off too?" -- "If it meant that I would never hear that stupid cliche again I would be first in line." When in doubt, push random buttons! It's okay to talk to inanimate objects, its when they talk back that you should be worried A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk; I have a work station... When Life gives you lemons squirt them in Life's eyes!! Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door I'm one of those people who could perfectly understand Jack Sparrow's confusing rants and when your friends all had confounded expressions on their faces you were like, "well duh that made perfect sense" You Know You're a Book Nerd If: You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on. You stay up to read a book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading. Just about everything you do revolves around reading. If you're not reading, you're probably on fanfiction.net, drawing fan art, etc. You try to get all of your friends to read your favorite books. Everything reminds you of the book. (EVERYTHING) You quote random lines all the time. (ALL THE TIME.) You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't. You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class. You have pictures of your favorite characters on your computer. You've got a book memorized. You've read a specific book more than five times. (lots...) You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days. (Of course I have! That's tiny! It would only take about 4 hours, if I like the book. ) You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like. You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional. IF YOU ARE A BOOK NERD AND PROUD OF IT, COPY AND PASTE ONTO YOUR PROFILE!!!!!! 6 truths of life 1- You cannot touch all of your top teeth with your tongue 2- All Idiots, after reading the first truth, will try 3- And discovered that the first truth is a lie and feel superior because they can do it 4- You're smiling now because you're an idiot 5- You soon will paste it on your profile for other idiots 6- There is still a stupid smile on your face Repost if you are an idiot like me! Fanfiction: Because 87% of all original endings suck. Fanfiction: Because 95% of all plot twists are either predictable or stupid. Fanfiction: Because my favorite characters always die. Fanfiction: Because sometimes evil deserves to win. Fanfiction: Because sometimes authors just don't know which of their own characters go together best. Fanfiction: Because most authors aren't willing to write multiple versions of their stories just so we can see every possibility that arises. Fanfiction: Because all stories shouldn't have an ending; there should always be another adventure. Fanfiction: Because sometimes there's no one your age and gender who you can relate to. Fanfiction: Because sometimes you want to be in that story yourself. Fanfiction: Because sometimes you have no other way to express the ideas in your head. Fanfiction: Because it's an escape |
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