Author has written 33 stories for Transformers, Transformers/Beast Wars, and Batman Begins/Dark Knight. NOTE TO READERS: I apologize for any long absences on my part. RL has been crazy. I get on/write/read/whatever as often as I can, but it's still not as often as I'd like. Thanks to all for your patience and encouragement! Other sites I'm on: http:///user/ExactlyWhat -- Most of the stuff on there (at the time of me writing this -- I think I'm gonna repost my stuff on there) is old, and I'm not really happy with it anymore. http:/// -- It's mostly the same stuff as on here, but there is some other stuff, like drawings and/or anything I write that's not fanfiction. http:///users/Exactlywhat -- My AO3 account. *shrugs* Yet another place where all the same stuff will be posted. http:/// -- The drawings on my deviantart account will also be posted on livejournal, so, whichever you prefer... Well, I suppose, since this is my profile, and supposed to be about me... My username: I've gotten a few questions about where I get my username... And it's actually pretty simple. Ever heard of Shel Silverstein? He wrote a poem called The Meehoo with an Exactlywatt. It was always my favorite as a kid... A sort of shortened, kid's version of Abbot and Costello's Who's on First routine... The Meehoo with an Exactlywatt By Shel Silverstein Knock knock! Who's there? Me! Me who? What's right? Meehoo! That's what I want to know! Me, WHO? Yes, exactly! Exactly what? Yes, I have an Exactlywatt on a chain! Yes! Yes what? No, Exactlywatt! That's what I want to know! I told you - Exactlywatt! Exactly WHAT? Yes! Yes what? Yes, it's with me! What's with you? Exactlywatt - that's what's with me. Me who? Yes! GO AWAY! Knock knock... Here are some quotes from who-knows-where, because I believe that our favorite quotes say more about us than the people or things we're quoting. (And that right there is a quote. . ) I Believe: That we don't have to change friends, if we understand that friends change. That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you once in a while, and you must forgive them for it. That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. That it's taking a long time to become the person I want to be. That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. That you can keep going long after you can't. That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. That either you control your attitude or it controls you. That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, passion fades and there had better be something else to take it's place. That heroes are the people who do what has to be done, regardless of the consequences. That money is a bad way to keep score. That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing, and still have the best time. That sometimes, the people you expect to kick you when you're down are the ones who help you get back up. That when I'm angry, I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, they love you with all they have. That maturity has more to do with the kind of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them, and less with how many birthdays you've celebrated. That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes, you have to forgive yourself. That no matter how hard your heart has broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief. That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, we are responsible for who we become. That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, doesn't mean they do. That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever. That two people can look at exactly the same thing and see something completely different. That your life can be changed in a matter of hours, by people who don't even know you. That even when you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help. The credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. That the people you care about most in your life are taken from you too soon. I Believe. (And, believe it or not, but that was all on a sign in a resturaunt.) Fun Stuff... (An unmatched left parenthesis creates an unresolved tension that will stay with you all day. I want to be the person that when my feet hit the floor in the morning, the Devil says "Oh, shoot! She's awake!" No problem should ever have to be solved twice. Oh, good. I don't have to do math any more. Someone already solved those problems. When I am struck by the urge to exercise, I sit in a comfortable chair and wait for the urge to pass. Watch out for men in suits and ties; they like to tell little white lies. I want to be a blip on the Devil's radar. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can get you in a lot of trouble. I don't have ADHD, I just- Squirrel. Sorry, Christmas is canceled. I told Santa I was good this year, and he died laughing. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk. They then spend the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. A computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for my karate. Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over. I don't obsess! I just... think intently. Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. Yes, I hit like a girl. If you hit a little bit harder, you could too! It's us versus the world. We attack at dawn! You ask what's so exciting about blowing stuff up? Well, see, it turns stuff, into flying chunks of stuff! I ran with scissors and lived! It made me feel dangerous. I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly. God made man. Then he looked, thought, said "I can do better", and he made woman. I'm not scared of death! What's it gonna do, kill me? It doesn't matter how it explodes, as long as it explodes. What's normal? Is it a disease? OMG! Don't come near me! I might catch your 'normal'!! The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. I use the force to open automatic doors... But I'm still working on the regular ones. Stand back! I'm trying science! I know kung fu, karate, and 37 other dangerous words. CAUTION! I'm not like other girls. You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. Curiosity killed the cat, but I was a suspect for a while. Can't stand me? Then sit down. HA HA HA! HAHAHAHA!... Wait... What? Slinky Escalator = Endless Fun I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes. I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect! Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. Toes: see "shin." While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it... thanks Mario Kart. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to. My mind works like lightning... one brilliant flash and it's gone. If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'? Never, under any circumstance, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'. Never lick a steak knife. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can actually see a baby emerging from her at that moment. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter is not a nice person. The Autobots don't do toasters, but if they did, they'd be the best toasters in the universe. But be glad the Decepticons don't do toasters either... They'd burn all the toast. Neve be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic. Men are like fine wine... They start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the snot out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with. Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, but Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad. If Revenge is a dish best served cold, and Revenge is sweet, than wouldn't it be ice cream? If "the pen is mightier than the sword", how come "actions speak louder than words"? Just when they think they have all the answers, I change the questions. Some Words of Wisdom We fall so we can learn to pick ourselves up and become stronger. To stand is to risk falling. To walk is to risk stumbling. To try is to risk failing. To live is to risk dying. But that is a risk I'm willing to take. The fame of a warrior is build on a thousand corpses. One often meets his fate on the path he takes to avoid it. Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon. All creatures fear the unknown; that is a well known fact. The only problem is that many refuse to overcome the fear and accept it. Accepting the unknown is not saying that you are unafraid. It is merely stating that you are willing to adjust to life's changes. REMEMBER WHEN? Remember When getting HIGH meant swinging on a playground? the worst thing you could get from a boy is COOTIES? when MOM was your hero? and DAD was the man you were gonna marry? and your WORST ENEMIES were your siblings? and RACE ISSUES were about who ran the fastest? when WAR was a card game? and life was simple and care free? remember when all you wanted to do WAS GROW UP PUT THIS IN YOUR PROFILE IF YOU'RE STILL 5 INSIDE-NO MATTER WHAT AGE YOU ARE ;) A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.'Al-Gebra is a problem for all of us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like "X" and "Y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns" but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle!" OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing. Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones, because they are afraid of falling. Afraid of getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree To Be A Friend If you've got friends like mine, raise your glasses. If you don't, raise your standards. Dear BEST FRIEND, You're stupid. You fail. You're weird. You're not perfect. But. Guess what? That's okay. Because I'm like that, too. We laugh at the randomest things. You know my ugliest side. Even though we disagree sometimes, we never fight. When I'm sad, you're always there to make sure I'm okay, and I'm there for you. Thanks. Love you, BEST FRIEND. Best friends since 'pinky-swears' and 'double-dares'. You want to get mad? Yell at me. You want to cry? Cry on my shoulder. You want a hand to hold? Grab mine. She's my best friend. Break her heart, I'll break your face. Your friends love you anyway. Friendship isn't one big thing, it's the million of little ones. Real friends will always be at your side, even when you tell them to leave. Good friends are HARD to find, HARDER to leave, and IMPOSSIBLE to forget. Friendship is born at that moment; when one person says to another, "What? You too? I thought I was the only one!" You want to get mad? Yell at me. You want to cry? Cry on my shoulder. You want a hand to hold? Grab mine. My friends are the kind of people who, if my house were burning down, they'd jump in and rescue me, then break out the marshmallows and start hitting on the firemen. “Are we going to be friends forever?” asked Piglet. Because once upon a time, we were best friends. And, yes, there's been a lot of bad stuff in between. But none of that matters right now, okay? You need me, I'm there. Any time, any place, anywhere. Side by side or miles apart, best friends are always close to the heart. You can always tell when two people are best friends, because they'll be having way more fun than it makes sense for them to be having. Friends are like stars; they come and go, but the ones that stay are the ones that glow. Sometimes, when I say, "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes and say "No. I know you aren't." Unlike Barbie, my friends and I are NOT sold separately. You never know what it's like to lose a best friend until you look back and don't feel safe enough to fall. Friendship is like standing on wet cement. The longer you stay, the harder it's to leave, and you can never go without leaving your footprints behind. Friendship isn't about who's been there the longest. It's about who came, and never left your side. I can't stop the downpour, but I'll always be willing to go with you for a walk in the rain. The only reason God didnt make us sisters is because one mom couldn't handle us both. A real friend is the one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. Best friends are the people who make your problems their problems, just so you don't have to go throught them alone. A stranger stabs you in the front. A friend stabs you in the back. A boyfriend stabs you in the heart. But best friends only poke at each other with straws. If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile... But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me. A true friend can see your hidden tears behind the smile everyone else believes. Friends are like walls: sometimes you need one to lean on, and other times, it's just enough to know they're there. A friend is someone who believes in you, even when you no longer believe in yourself. When you’re down, I may not be able to pick you back up, but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you. You want to know who your real friends are? Screw up and see who's still there. A good friend wonders about your romantic history. A best friend could blackmail you with it, because she's been there through it all. A good friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A best friend opens your refrigerator and helps themselves, because she knows you don't care. A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" because she knows it will make you laugh. A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." because she knows he deserves it. A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?" because she knows you've gotta figure out how to get up on your own. A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you, because she knows you need him. A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend will hand you a Kleenex, grab a shovel, and ask you “Who do I have to kill?” because she knows there's a reason. A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you, because she knows it's what you need. A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in, because she knows you want to swim anyways. A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run, girl, run!" because she knows you'd do it to her. A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies, because she knows why you killed them, and maybe even helped. A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down and A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!" because she knows it was worth it and you'd happily go again. A good friend asks you for your number. A best friend asks you for their number, because she knows you've dialed it enough to memorize it ten times over. A good friend convinces you not to jump off the cliff. A best friend hugs you "Goodbye, I'll miss you. Can I have your iPod?" because she knows why you're jumping. A good friend will leave you. A best friend will be there always, because she knows you better than you know yourself. And you know her. If one day, you feel like crying, Call me. I can't promise I can make you laugh, but I'm willing to cry with you. If one day, you feel like running away, Call me. I can't promise I can convince you to stop, but I'lll run at your side. If one day you don't want to listen to anyone, Call me. I promise to be there for you, and I promise to be very quiet. If one day you're bored, Call me. I can't promise to entertain you, but I can be bored with you. But if one day you call me, And there is no answer, Promise you will come. Because I might just need you. A true friend... The Best Friend Contract I promise to listen to my best friend, even if it's about video games, weird stuff, or things I don't really care about. I promise to keep in touch with my best friend constantly. I promise to be there when my best friend needs me. I promise to be honest at all times with my best friend. I promise to never keep anything from my best friend (unless it is a surprise party for them). I promise to help my best friend grow into a better person. I promise to set aside work and myself when my best friend has problems and needs to talk. I promise to always let my best friend be the first to know anything and everything. I promise to laugh WITH not AT my best friend (unless they do something really stupid and/or funny). I promise never to do anything to screw up our friendship. IF THERE IS A BREACH OF CONTRACT, THE INJURED PARTY HAS DISCRETION ON THE KIND OF PUNISHMENT OR TORTURE TO BE IMPOSED ON THE OTHER PARTY, BUT REASONABLE MEANS TO REMEDY THE BREACH ARE HIGHLY ENCOURAGED. (EX: TALKING IT OUT.) I hearby agree to these conditions. It's the times we're so crazy, Our inside jokes-too many to name. When we're apart it's never the same. When we're together it's nothing but fun. Replacing my girls just can't be done. As the years pass, and we grow apart. I want you to know, that you're in my heart. You helped me through problems, through things good and bad. You helped me keep smiling, when I was sad. You helped me with guys, you made me stay strong. How will I live, when you guys are gone? And where the years take us, no place is too far. We will think of each other, wherever we are. You're wonderful people, with good hearts to lend. And I want you to know, that ya'll will always be my Best Friends As a Writer, Reader, and Reviewer: I will be courteous in all PMs and reviews. I will be polite, kind, and honest. Rudeness never got anyone anywhere. I will never hold a chapter hostage. I write for me, and though reviews are fun and I enjoy getting them, they are not the reason I am here. I will not give up if someone flames me or my stories. I have more important things to do than listen to people who have nothing better to do than trawl through stories and bash them to bits. I will keep canon characters as close to canon as possible, unless writing a crack!fic or I have a very good reason. I will strive to make my Original Characters believable and not invincible. Even Superman has a weakness, and nobody can identify with someone who has no faults. I will proof-read everything before I post and get someone else to look it over if possible. I understand there will be mistakes, and that not many people enjoy decoding something before reading it. I will not post chapters that consist of only author's notes. Not only is this against Fanfiction.net's rules, but people are not reading my stories to hear about my personal life. I will not put down any story or author, instead offering my thoughts and polite advice. I will do my very best to make my plots original and entertaining. If I must reuse an idea, I will make it as different and new as possible. I will be a proud FanFiction writer, reader, and editor. |
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