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 (WARNING BEWARE STOP HERE IF YOU LOVE TO HAVE A GOOD LAUGH OR CRY READ ON IF NOT STOP HERE) my name is sarah im femal “You are fearfully and wonderfully made!” - Psalm 139 milky way galay planet earth united states state of Washington on the western side of the mountains I LOVE THE RAIN AND LIGHTNING AND THUNDER i love teddybears but dont judge i can have claws if you make me angry my fav candy kitkat or peanut butter m&ms I LOVE KITKATS fav icecream is chocolate and chocolate fudge brownie yum my fav music is celtic woman and jars of clay along with mercy me and school of worship im a poet and i hate headaches and writers block i love to draw sunsets my mind is like lightning one brilliant flash then its gone OH MY GOSH HAPPY BIRTHDAY harry potter 7/31/2013 happy birthday harry your my hero I see the moon the moon sees me under the shade of the old oak tree please let the light that shines on me shine on the one I love Taken from I see the moon by : hctiB-notsoB oh woe is me oh woe is me i used to have a hamster tree but it was eaten by a newt and now i have no cuddly fruit oh woe is me oh woe is me i used to have a hamster tree from letters to the order garenteed to keep you laughing i know i nearly died from laughing so much in memory of Severus snape who died a griffendor but was a real jerk for the golden trio's hogwarts years and a real bastered in 5th year in memory of dobby the house elf who was awesome and he deserved every second of freedom he got and even more 19 ways to wins a girls heart 1.hugs from behind 2.grab her hand when you walk together (NEVER make her do it) 3.when standing wrap your arms around her 4.cuddle with her 5.DONT MAKE HER DO ANYTHING 6.write little notes 7.complement her honestly 8.when you hug her hold her in your arms for as long as possible SUPER sweet to her her at night and wish her sweet dreams 11.comfort her when she cries 12.wipe away her tears her with all you heart 14.pick her up and flirt with her (she will scream put me down but really she loves it) a gentlemen (hold the door open for her) 16.DONT let your friends talk trash about her it'll get back to her & don't EVER act different in front of your friends then if it was just you and her 17.take her for long walks at night 18. when its cold always bring a blanket so you can comfort her and hold her 19.NEVER LIE TO HER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! because then she will think all you ever told her was a lie - even I love you of all the things i've lost i miss my mind the most i dont suffer from insanity i enjoy every moment of it you cry i cry you laugh i laugh you fall off a cliff im at the bottom ready to catch you real girls aren't perfect perfect girls aren't real life isn't passing me by it's trying to run me over stupidity killed the cat curiosity was framed i dont get the point of harry /ginny ginny looks like his mom its wrong just wrong h/hr all the way if you think cedric shouldnt have died repost this if santa a honest lawyer and a nice politian are in a room theres a cookie who gets the cookie . ...santa would the other two don't exsist 90 present of teens today would die if myspace had a system failure or was completely destroid repost this if your part of the 10% who would be laughing there head off or would have hacked the site if you have ever read past 2 am post this on your profile say hallaluya if you think this world has way to many damn sterio types i for one am SICK OF IT IT DOESNT MATTER just be your self we shouldnt judge at all because WE ARE NOT PERFECT please repost if you agree friends comfort you when your boyfriend breaks up with you best friends will go over to his house and kick his butt for hurting you friends will abandon you if thats what the crowd is doing best friends will kick the whole crowds butts for leaving you friends would knock then come in best friends come right in yelling im home im so gangster i carry a squirt gun the true soldier fights not because he hates whats in front of him but because he loves whats behind him -g.k chesterton poetry is a way of taking life by the throat - robert frost half the world is composed of people who have something to say but can't the other half has nothing to say and keeps saying it-robert frost a teenage girl about 17 named diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as they shared events of the passed year . she ended up staying longer than planned She lay on a bed of rose petals in the middle of a crowd. With eyes closed and hands folded across her breast, she drew no breath from the air arounHer skin that had been so rosy before now had the appearance of white ash. The people that surrounded the woman wore black clothes, tear stained faces and looks of sadness; while the woman wore a white dress with pearls on her neck and a look on her face that said she was finally at peace. Among those in black were the woman’s parents. Her mother’s sobs broke the silence that engulfed everyone else as her eyes stayed trained on her daughter’s now lifeless body. Her husband did nothing to comfort her as he stared numbly at his daughter trying to remember her in pigtailed youth instead of the woman that had fought so hard to live but could not. No parent should have to burry their child. Next to the young woman’s parents stood a man with a child of two cradled in his arms. The young boy had his head nestled into the crook of his father’s neck, while looking at his mother wondering why she would not wake up. His fathers gaze was locked on the woman, his wife, wishing that she would take a breath and have the color return to her cheeks and have the will to fight the disease that had taken her from him, their son, her family and ultimately this world. As the crowd of mourners began to disperse the woman’s son blew her a kiss goodbye not realizing that breast cancer would keep his mother from blowing a kiss back. Copy this to your profile if you have lost someone to breast cancer. Quotes You need not expect to get your book right the first time. Go to work and revamp or rewrite it. God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention. These are God's adjectives. You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.Mark Twain The test of any good fiction is that you should care something for the characters; the good to succeed, the bad to fail. The trouble with most fiction is that you want them all to land in hell, together, as quickly as possible. Mark Twain Girls are NOT complicated. Seriously, how hard is it to say "You're pretty" and give us chocolate? Unknown “If you talk bad about country music, it's like saying bad things about my momma. Them's fightin' words.” Dolly Parton "Its not what you take when you leave this world behind you it's what you leave behind you when you go" Randy Travis "God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" Billy Currington you can never be sure with love. You just have to take your chances and hope it turns out well- unknown I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back."The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The Cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me." "I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' "OK" he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'' "I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message, or 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart This is a story about a little girl that was abused. If you care at all, copy and paste this into your profile: A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, she asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to cry. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked her for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. She was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." You're never alone... 93 Percent Of the people who read this won't repost it. Don't be one of those people. "Zeus's master bolt," Chiron said, getting worked up now. "The symbol of his power, from which all other lightning bolts are patterned. The first weapon made by the Cyclopes for the war against the Titans, the bolt that sheered the top off Mount Etna and hurled Kronos from his throne; the master bolt, which packs enough power to make mortal hydrogen bombs look like firecrackers." The demigods looked nervous except Percy who had been there done that and had the camp bead to prove it "And it's missing?" this quote is from PJ LT http://www.fanfiction.ws/s/8479907/12/Big-three-people-and-gods-read-the-books Believe in God and he'll always be there to protect you. A Dads Poem Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow. Today was Daddy's Day at school, and she couldn't wait to go. But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home. Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone. But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home. But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet. Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. one by one the teacher called a student from the class. To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed. At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare. each of them was searching, for a man who wasn't there. "Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out. "She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout. And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day." The words did not offend her, she smiled up at her Mom and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on. And with hands behind her back, slowly she began to speak. And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique. "My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day. And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories, he taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him. I'm not standing here alone. "Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart I know because he told me, he'll forever be in my heart" With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd. She finished with a voice so soft, but its message clear and loud. "I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star. And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far. You see he was a fireman and died just this past year when airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear. But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away." And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day. And to her mother’s amazement, she witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side. "I know you're with me Daddy," to the silence she called out. And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed. But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose. And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, by the love of her shining star. And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far. ‘They’ say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them. Send this to the people you'll never forget and remember to send it also to the person that sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in a hurry and that you've forgotten your friends. Take the time...to live and love. Until eternity. May you be blessed If you've ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this onto your profile. If you've ever run into a door copy this onto your profile. If you have ever run into a tree copy this onto your profile. If you prefer cold and snow over heat and sun, paste this to your profile. If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile. If you've ever read past two in the morning, copy this into your profile. If there are times when you just want to annoy someone for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy this into your profile If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with the current conversation, copy this into your profile. If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile. If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile. If you're a night person, copy this to your profile. If you think clowns are evil and will someday take over the world copy this on your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile. If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile. If people tend to misunderstand you copy this to your profile. If your friends can scare you by saying the word pink or cute wittle bunny rabbits copy this to your profile. Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this and put it in your profile. If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile if you have ever been on one train of thought but got distracted for a few seconds and forgot what it was, copy and... what was i doing? If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone their not, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes, copy and paste this into your profile. If you want to see the world someday, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile If you've ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile. If you realize that copying and pasting things in your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy this to your profile. If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile If you’re a person who acts friendly, but has an evil mind and is planning to dominate the world, copy this to your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things' TO EVERY GUY To every guy that's said, "Sex CAN wait.” To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful. To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town to see her. To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick. To every guy who has given her flowers just because. To every guy that said he would die for her. To every guy that really would. To every guy that took time to do what she wanted to do. To every guy that she cried in front of. To every guy that holds hands with her. To every guy that kisses her with meaning. To every guy that hugs her when she's sad. To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all. To every guy who would give their jacket up for her. To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe. To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes. To every guy that would give his seat up. To every guy that just wants to cuddle. To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what. To every guy who told his secrets to her. To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath. To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one. To every guy that believed in her dreams. To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them. To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams. To every guy that walked her to her car. To every guy that gave his heart. To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her. ...This one bulletin is for you... Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore... And because of this, there are not many left out there... i guarantee 90 of the men on your page will not repost this cuz they care more about their image If you are a nice guy repost this with "We're a Dying Breed " If you are a girl that thinks every guy should treat a girl this way repost this with: "To Every Guy..." This is really sweet... When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind. When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply. When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around. When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all. When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying. When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever. When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered. When a girl says "I love you." she means it. When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that. Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person. Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him. The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats. The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him. The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her.". If you read this, you have to repost it, guy or girl, or you will have bad luck for the rest of your life. If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you. Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you. Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere. So get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you don't repost this, you will be cursed with relationship problems for all of eternity. Repost this to your profile, and spare yourself the emotional stress Put an X if you have done these things X You've run into a glass/screen door. X You have jumped out of a moving vehicle X You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks. XYou have run into a tree/bush. XYou know that it IS possible to lick your elbow X You have tried to lick your elbow XYou never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle , Twinkle Little _Star have the same tune. X You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen. XYou have accidentally caught something on fire You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes. XYou have caught yourself drooling. x you have fallen asleep in class and started to talk/drool, or snore. X Sometimes you just stop thinking. X You are telling a story and forget what you were talking about. People often shake their heads and walk away from you. x You are often told to use your 'inside voice'. X You use your fingers to do simple math. You have eaten a bug x You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important. X You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it. X You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand. You’ve ever stapled your hand xYou break a lot of things. x Your friends know not to use big words around you. X You tilt your head when you're confused. XYou have fallen out of your chair before. X When you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling. X The word 'um' is used many times a day FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food. REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food. FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs. REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents mom & dad FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong. REAL FRIENDS: Would be sittin next to you sayinin man... That was awsesome! FAKE FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you. FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back. REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget its yours. FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you. FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. REAL FRIENDS: Will get the whole crowd that left you. FAKE FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. REAL FRIENDS: walk in without knocking like they live there. FAKE FRIENDS: Will talk bad to the person who talks bad about you. REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them out. FAKE FRIENDS: Would ignore this. REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it. FAKE FRIENDS: Are for a while. REAL FRIENDS: Are forever! Copy and paste this to your profile if you were very, VERY, VERY angry when Danny phantom was cancelled If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile. I walk in the rain- others just get wet! Copy and paste if you walk in the rain! If you love Fanfiction.net, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever laughed at people getting hurt copy and paste this on your profile. Copy and paste this to your profile if every time your friends ask you what you did this morning you reply with something about being on the computer. Copy and paste this to your profile if you love thunder storms. Copy and paste this to your profile if you think that the backspace key is one of the best inventions ever. things to do at wal-mart Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!" Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here! Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!" If you have Phantom Phever and you know it, copy and paste this into your profile! If you support the pairing harry/hermione copy and post this to your profile H/HR FOREVER!! :D If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile. If you actually take the time to read copy and pastes, copy this onto your profile If you've ever written stuff on your car windows when they're covered in condensation, copy this to your profile If you ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head on a table, copy and paste this onto your profile If you really have no idea how this copy and pasting stuff started, but enjoy it anyway, copy and paste this into your profile. If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile. What to Do During an Exam 1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!" 2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is. 3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level. 4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative. 5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off. 6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min. 7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else. 8. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible. 9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you. 10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it. 11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam. 12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was 7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else. 8. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible. 9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you. 10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it. 11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam. 12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was. 13. Get the exam. 20 min into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Darn this!" and walk out triumphantly. 14. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go ice skating.) 15. Show up completely insane (completely insane means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy). 16. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day. 17. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away. 18. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story. 19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave. 20. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice. (I would never do that) 21. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach. 22. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave. 23. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary. 24. Act spazzy 25. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the heck are you? Where's the regular guy?" 26. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! 27. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out. 28. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!" 29. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai. 30. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her. 31. In the middle of the test, have a friend rush into the classroom, tag your hand, and resume taking your test for you. When the teacher asks what's going on, calmly explain the rules of Tag Team Testing to him/her. 32. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit." 33. Stand up after about 15 minutes, and say loudly, "Okay, let's double-check our answers! Number one, A. Number two, C. Number three, E..." 34. Fake an heart attack. When interrupted, apologize, and explain that question #_ moved you, deeply. 35. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect. 36. Tailgate outside the classroom before the exam. 37. If your answers are on a scantron sheet, fill it out in pen. 38. Bring a giant cockroach into the room and release it on a girly-girl nearby. 39. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle. 40. Bring one pencil with a very sharp point. Break the point off your pencil. Sharpen the pencil. Repeat this process for one hour. 41. Make Strange noises... get people to stare... look at the person next to you as if he/she did it. 42. Dress like the professor. 43. Use Invisible Ink to answer the whole exam. 44. Order catering. The catering company should come in about halfway through the test, and should include at least three waiters, eight carts of food, and five candelabras. A good friend helps you up when you fall down. A best friend laughs and trips you again. Or sits on you back and forces you to stay down... A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will prank call him and whisper, “You will die in seven days..." A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?" A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you. A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!" A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies. A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!" A good friend never asks for anything to eat or drink. Best friends Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. A good friend Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. A best friend Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has you on speed dial. A good friend borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. A best friend loses your junk and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." A good friend only knows a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... A good friend will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. A best friend will kick the whole crowds’ butt that left you. A good friend would knock on your front door. A best friend will walk right in and say "I'M HOME." A friend will help me find my way when I'm lost. A best friend will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions A friend will help me learn to drive. A best friend will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance. A friend will watch my pets when I go away. A best friend won't let me go away without them. A friend will go to a concert with me. A best friend will kidnap the band with me. A good friend hides me from the cops. A best friend is probably the reason they are after me in the first place. A good friend lets me make an idiot of myself in public. A best friend is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too. A good friend is only through school/college. A best friend is for life. If you had ever gotten writer's block in a sudden and random moment, copy this to your profile If you like chocolate as much as i do copy and paste this into your profile Highlight the things that has happened to you I have: 1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out 2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails 3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it 4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking 5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking 6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head 7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself 8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand 9. Tried to push open a door that said pull 10. Tried to pull open a door that said push 11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion 12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else 13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs 14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave 15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair 16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble 17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it 18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard 19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name 20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot 21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on 22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle. 23. Have run into a closed door 24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else 25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it 26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke 27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer 28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan 29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk 30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock 31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it 32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside 33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else 34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property 35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot 36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on 37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in 38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard 39. Walked into a pole 40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident 41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house 42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on 43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small 44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it 45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do. 46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it 47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up 48. Have poked yourself in the eye 49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on 50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair 51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test 52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil 53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it 54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was. 55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were 56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on 57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day. 58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it 60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie 61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa 62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it 63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence 64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person 65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side 66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions 67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong 68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it 69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out- 70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught 71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face 72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb 73. Ran into a door jam 74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid 75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it 76. Have purposely licked playground sand 77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band 78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't 79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people 80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out 81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off 82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again 83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back. 84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about 85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair 86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone 87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird 88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people 89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria 90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it. 91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil 92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them 93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper 94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours 95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story 96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs 97. You have spelled your own name wrong before 98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling. 99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class. 100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (Fav color and fav animal): blue dolphine Lines that Make You Smile 1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. 3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. 4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 5. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive. 6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. 7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. 9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing. 10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. 11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. 12. God must love stupid people; He made so many. 13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. 14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. 15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? 16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it! 17. Wrinkled Was NOT One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up! 18. Procrastinate Now! 19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That? 20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes. 21. A journey of a thousand miles must, begin with a cash advance. 22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! 23. He who dies with the most toys, is nonetheless DEAD. 24. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory. 25. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. 26. The trouble with life is there's no background music. 27. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson. 28. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on. The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary. You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a cliff...I laugh again. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic. The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'. "Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." 1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you." 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile There are two types of people in the world, Robots and Aliens, Robots do what they are told, follow the crowd, and are lifeless...Aliens however, are not of this world, people fear what is different, aliens do not follow a crowd, they do not follow a 'master' they are different and full of life, they are more than just a shell, if you are willing to prove that you are not a Robot and will not follow a crowd willingly copy and paste this into your profile, because hey, not everything that is different, is bad Imagine that you enter a parlor. You come late. When you arrive, others have long preceded you, and they are engaged in a heated discussion, a discussion too heated for them to pause and tell you exactly what it is about. In fact, the discussion had already begun long before any of them got there, so that no one present is qualified to retrace for you all the steps that had gone before. You listen for a while, until you decide that you have caught the tenor of the argument; then you put in your oar. Someone answers; you answer him; another comes to your defense; another aligns himself against you, to either the embarrassment or gratification of your opponent, depending upon the quality of your ally’s assistance. However, the discussion is interminable. The hour grows late, you must depart. And you depart, with the discussion still vigorously in progress. The Philosophy of Literary Form: Studies in Symbolic Action A little interesting note (Official word count from Scholastic Inc except DH) June 1997 Philosopher's Stone: 76,944 words July 1998 Chamber of Secrets: 85,141 words July 1999 Prisoner of Azkaban: 107,253 words July 2000 Goblet of Fire: 190,637 words June 2003 Order of the Phoenix: 257,054 words July 2005 Half-Blood Prince: 168,923 words July 2007 Deathly Hallows: 204,796 words Re-post this to help stop racism: Black and White: A black man was talking to a white man and said: "I'm black. When I was born I was black. When I grew up I was black. When I'm sick I'm black. When I go in the sun I'm black. When I'm cold I'm black. When I die I'll still be black. Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stare at the walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing But you: When you were born you were pink. When you grew up you were white. When you're sick you're green. When you go in the sun you're red. When you're cold you're blue. When you die you'll be purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored. " (='.'=) This is Bunny. (")_(") Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him." A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute." The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK,When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism. Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree.The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The Cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me." "I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' "OK" he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said, "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'' "I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message, or 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart This is a story about a little girl that was abused. If you care at all, copy and paste this into your profile: A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, she asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to cry. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked her for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. She was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." You're never alone... 93 Percent Of the people who read this won't repost it. Don't be one of those people. Believe in God and he'll always be there to protect you. And this is how I remember Harry Potter, Wizardry World in daily life... when people talk of time, I remember Hermione, the time-turner. when people talk of wounds and scars, I remember Harry, his connection. when I see flames, I remember Ron, his red hair. when people talk of imprisonment, I remember Sirius Black, his time in Azkaban. when people talk of death, I remember Lily and James, their love for Harry. when people talk of killers, I remember ol' Volders, his evilness. when people talk of gangs, I remember death-eaters, their mean-ness. when people talk of bravery, I remember Moody, his protection. when people talk of ferrets, I remember Draco, his after-math fear of ferrets. when people talk of betrayal, I remember Peter, his way of selling the Potters. When people talk of principles, I remember Percy, his prim-ness. and lastly, when people ask me if I believe in magic... I SAY YES! everyday, whenever I get a chance to wish upon anything, I wish that... I BECOME A WITCH! I'm not old enough to go to Hogwarts yet. Because next year, I'll get my letter. BECAUSE I'M A SCARY WITCH WHO GETS HER LETTERS! and here are some of the quotes I made myself... They say I'm annoying. I take it as a Compliment. They say I'm mean. I say that I'm not, I'm EVIL! They say I'm crazy. I say that better crazy and unique, than boring and normal like you. Those who scorn us writers are just have no creativity. People with no creativity have nothing. I'm a nerd- deal with it. STOP GLOBAL WARMING... it's melting my chocolate. MY PLEDGE TO HP You say Twilight I say Harry Potter You say vampires I say wizards You say Jacob Black I say Sirius Black you say Team Edward I say Team Potter You say Robert Pattison I'll say "is Cedric Diggory" You think Bella and Edward are the perfect dream couple? I think that's James and Lily You say Edward I'll say Harry, now STUPEFY (O.o ) This is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your profile to help him on his way to world domination. IF YOU SAY POTTER IS BETTER THAN CULLEN, NO DOUBT, I THINK YOU ARE AWESOME, FELLOW POTTERHOLIC You are human. It is paper. You will always win. this is for you if you think origami is hard! I'm a Potterholic. If you aren't, I think you are stupid. BOY: you hit like a girl. GIRL: and maybe you would too if you hit a little bit hard- nah, who am I kidding? WIZARDS ARE SUPREME. YOU THINK NOT, THEN HERE... AVADA KADAVRA! Do you believe me now!? HUH!? HUH!? *pokes* oops, you're dead. Sorry! I. Will. Kill. You. If. You. Sit. On. That. Box. If you read that with pauses in between, C&P! Say that wizards are better than vampires or else I'll Avada Kadavra your bum off. NOW SAY IT! Put this on your Profile. If you Love Music (o) (\_/) PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE ('.') IF YOU HATE (")_(") ANIMAL CRUELTY x x XxXxXxXxXxX x xXxPotterxXx... RuLEs. x XxXxXxXxXxX x "Always give 100% percent at work...12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday" ;D "Cinderella walked on broken glass, Sleeping Beauty let a life time pass, Belle fell in love with a beast, Jasmine chose a poor man, Ariel spent her life on land. We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person prefectly" I find 'good morning' a contradiction of terms. I've heard that it's possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. I asked my teacher if I'd get in trouble for something I didn't do. She said of course not, so I told her I didn't do my homework "I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells." It's you and me against the world...we attack at dawn. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. Have you ever been walking down the street and realised that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions. - I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with? There is a great need for sarcasm font. Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart". - How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said? What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other? - While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart. One out of four people is insane. Look at three of your friends. If it's not them, it's you "What you're looking for is always in the last place you look Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory. When there's a will, I want to be in it. "It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt-then it's hilarious!" You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor. My imaginary friend thinks that you have serious problems. If a parent/guardian asks you, "What did you learn at school today?" answer, "I learnt how to survive it." When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets. Hey, all you people who have survived Alice, Let me give you some great news... Alice is on a Quest! her goal is to annoy different Harry Potter characters to the bursting point. First is Voldy, of course. Then I think I'll do the Marauders. Keep tuned in my writing for Laughter until death! (or death by Alice...) Harry Voldemort, Voldemort Cedric, and Cedric = Edward. So, Harry Voldemort Edward. Therefore, Harry Edward. So, Harry Potter Twilight. If you agree with this form of logic, copy and paste this into your profile. This is a tribute to all who died fighting Tom Marvolo Riddle Aka: Voldemort First off, I must say, Rest in Peace: James and Lily Potter, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black (The True Mauraders) Nymphadora Tonks, Ted Tonks,Professor Snape, Fred Weasley, Colin Creavy, Dobby, Hedwig, Regulus Black, Charity Burbadge, Mad-Eye Moody, Cedric Diggory, Grindewald, Sturgis Podmore, Gregorvitch, Benjy Fenwick, Edgar Bones, Gideon and Fabian Prewitt, Dorcas Meadows, Marlene McKinnon, Caradoc Dearborn, and all the brave souls that were lost to the War against Voldemort. May you all rest in Peace, and Remember you're never forgotten To James and Lily, Who died at the beginning, To Remus and Dora, Who will never know their son, To Severus, Who isn't actually all bad,-actually said Peter, but i still hate him. To Dumbledore, Who was as human as Harry, To Sirius, who was punished for what he didn't do To the hundreds that died needlessly, To the many that died 'for the greater good', To these brave souls I raise my glass, May they forever Rest In Peace... (from the profile of 14hp1 and An Artists Account) In Remembrance …In Remembrance to Severus Snape…. ….A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor… ...without all the red and gold crap. …In Remembrance to Fred Weasley… …Who fought bravely to the very end…. …And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half… …And will loyally await his soul mate and brother… … with many jokes… ...he's got forever to think of them, right? …In Remembrance to Dobby… …Who was more free and full of love… ...than any elf, and most humans. ….In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin…. ...the last real Marauderer... …who was not just a wonderful father… ….a incredible husband and brave hero… ...as well as a freakin' awesome werewolf. ….In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks… …who died for ‘the greater good’… ...and would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora. …In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody…. …who’s motto ‘constant vigilance’ kept him alive… ...and scared the crap out of some kids too. …In Remembrance of Tom Marvelo Riddle a.k.a. Voldemort…. …who was pretty cool, and cute when he was younger… …but who got his ass thoroughly kicked in the end …In Remembrance of Albus Dumbledore… …whose past and wisdom confused us… …whose seeming betrayal shocked us… …but actually who turned out to be an okay guy in the end... ...despite the whole 'almost killing Harry' thing. In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange… … because it’s was awesome how Molly slapped her with that Avada Kedavra! (No, she didn't!) She deserved everything she got and more. (She did not!) …In Remembrance of Colin Creevey… …who we really didn’t know too well… …but took a lot of pictures and died fighting in a war… …so he must’ve done something good… …besides stalking Harry. …In Remembrance of Hedwig… ...Harry's actual first friend… ...who lived and died soaring.(from athe profile of 14hp1 and An Artists Account) Why did you have to die? Why did you have to change the world with your murdering pen, Jo? Why? Normal girls slap, insane ones punch, kick, break bones, kill... you get my drift. List ten Harry Potter Characters... 1. James Potter I 2. Lily Evans 3. Remus Lupin 4. Sirius Black 5. Tonks 6. Dumbledore 7. Aberforth 8. Albus Potter 9. Minerva McGonagall 10. Rita Skeeter 1) Have you ever read a 5/10 fic before? Tonks and Rita? never, please, never 2) do you think 3 is hot? Nah, but as a younger one he was nice... 3) what if 6 got 1 pregnant? not happening, please Merlin... 4) do you recall any fics about 9? Not really 5) would 7/2 make a good ship? no, Merlin, what's wrong with you people? 6) 4/8 or 4/9? sirius/ albus or sirius/ minerva? I'd say sirius/ minerva, because atleast it's not slash. 7) what if seven found 3 and 8 in a relationship? either indifferent or freaked out... 8) make a summary for a 2/8 fic? Lily is hurt, having fled from James. she goes to Hogwarts, and finds a depressed Slytherin Albus. comforting each other, they must pick up the pieces of their worlds. 9) Is there a 4/10 romance fluff fic? with ships now, I wouldn't be surprised... 10) suggest a title for a 5/10 Hurt/ comfort fic. Shattered Worlds? I dunno... INSANITY QUIZ! I have made up this Insanity Quiz. please copy/paste to your profile. answer with yes and no answers. 1) Have you ever taught a parrot, or attempted to, teach a parrot HP spells? Yes 2) Have you ever had a staring contest with a Parrot/fish/snake? yep. The parrot won. 3) do you believe in a difference of insanity and stupidity? Yes 4) Do you mostly hate things because others think it's cool? yes. there's vampires, werewolves, older Remus... 5) Do you like talking in british accents because no one can understand them? yeah. i've got a great accent... 6) Do you decipher alot of stuff to mean that you are a witch? yes. Duh. OBVIOUSLY! 7) have you ever wondered if there's wi-fi on the top of the Eiffel Tower? i think there is. I wish so, so I can live there...yes 8) Are you in love with a character from harry Potter? yes. But I'm not telling you who... 9) would you go whooping and cheering if Justinette Beaver (Justin Bieber, who is a complete girl), Robert Pattinson, and Taylor lauthner jumped off a cliff onto POINTY rocks? HALLELUJAH! 10) Have you ever wondered weather it's cold in a luggage compartment? yes. and i would know if those bloody boys didn't crowd around it so i couldn't stick my hand in! RESULTS! if you answered yes to 1-3 answers... You have to work on your insanity, you're too NORMAL! If you answered yes to 4-7... you're okay, but you need to top, unless you prefer BALANCED! If you answered yes to 8-10... Congrats, You are Certifiably INSANE! I'M 8-10! ME IS INSANE! Join the army, visit exotic places, meet strange people then kill them. "Be a loser because 'cool' is overrated" "Well behaved women rarely make history" "Fail with Honour rather than Succeed by Fraud" wow, that's deep. If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches? What disease did cured ham have? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Why do alarm clocks "go off" when they start making noise? Why do we yell "Heads up!" when we should be yelling "Heads down!"? How can something be both "new" and "improved"? Why do we shut up, but quiet down? How did the "Keep Off the Grass" sign get there in the first place? Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? So what's the speed of dark? How come abbreviated is such a long word? If you can't beat them, confuse them. Reality continues to ruin my life. Life is just one bad thing after another. Unless it's a bunch of bad things all at once. If you get good grades and still don't know anything at all copy this onto your profile First law of science: don't spit into the wind May your life be like toilet paper - long and useful! theres always a light at the end of a tunnel just pray its not a train! take my advice i dont use it anyway Jealousy is a wasted emotion. Which is why I recycle! What does really suck? A giraffe with pain in his neck Don't be open-minded, your brains might fall out Homework? Do I pay school money to work at home!? Smile and the world smiles with you. Fart and you stand alone When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose There are some that are wise and others that are otherwise You'll never get rid of a bad temper by losing it! 1 out of 6 people are insane. except when you're friends with me and my friends, then 6 out of 6 people are insane. Reality is more fun when you make it up Words may hurt me, but sticks and stones will bounce off my force field So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil? I've heard that its possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. When in doubt, make up words! Ask no questions and I will tell no lies. You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not Cold then I'm Hot. I know I'm Hot. Thank You for embracing it! I'm not insensitive, I just dont care There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM... Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers. ADHD is Automatic Death by Hyperness Disorder. What would happen if the whole world farted at once? On a scale of one to awesome, that was purple. "Help! I've fallen and I can't -- Hey! Nice carpet!" I'm not afraid of death. What's it gonna to do? Kill me? Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. Rules are like paperclips. Meant to hold things together, fun to bend, and easy to twist out of shape. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target. The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears it is true. Eat right, exercise, die anyway. Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world. "At my lemonade stand I used to give away the first glass for free, and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote." Whoever said money can't buy happiness, didn't know where to shop If at first you do not succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left Everybody makes mistakes, thats why they put erasers on pencils The road to success is always under construction By the time you read this, you've already read it The higher you are, the farther you fall... so keep yur job at burger king! A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station.. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"? Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food? "Pretty girls turn heads. Me and my girls break necks" XD "Brilliant brunette with many blonde moments" Old enough to know better, but to young not to care" "Always give 100% percent at work...12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday" ;D "Cinderella walked on broken glass, Sleeping Beauty let a life time pass, Belle fell in love with a beast, Jasmine chose a poor man, Ariel spent her life on land. We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly" "Never go to bed angry. Stay awake and plot your revenge" We know Kung Fu...And 20 other dangerous words Girl 1 - "Heyyy! That's my EX-Boyfriend!" Girl 2 - "Relaaaaaax! I'm just recycling!" "A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate. I am generally very brave. Today, I just happen to have a headache. Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history I find 'good morning' a contradiction of terms. I've heard that it's possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. I asked my teacher if I'd get in trouble for something I didn't do. She said of course not, so I told her I didn't do my homework "We may not make good decisions But hell, we make good stories." "I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells." It's you and me against the world...we attack at dawn. Being mature is overrated. Slinky Escalator = Endless fun! I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realise you're wrong. I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter? Have you ever been walking down the street and realised that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft. I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said? I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers! What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other? While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart. Bad decisions make good stories. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far. Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. Gryffindor (The biggest heros in HP history as far as we know): 1. Welcome to Gryffindor, a Weasley has probably slept in your bed. 2. Gryffindors: Brave to the point of Idiocy. 3. Gryffindor: Because we blur the line between bold and stupid every time. 4. The beautiful, the brave and the bold. 5. Gryffindor: I'll kick your ass. 6. I'm in Gryffindor, you're in Gryffindor- let's hug!! 7. Gryffindor: because we get enough exercise just pushing our luck. 8. No excuses, rule breaking is customary. 9. Gryffindors are attention whores. Slytherin (The Junior Death Eaters): 1. We aren't all evil... yeah, we are. 2. Cunning and Ambition: Slytherin. 3. Go ahead, be a little naughty. 4. Slytherin: We have chained boys in the dungeons. 5. Slytherin: Because our common room is underwater (and that's cool). 6. It's not that we aren't better than you (except it totally is). 7. Why be normal? Or good? 8. We are Junior Death Eaters. Deal with it. 9. Slytherin: means never having to say you're sorry. 10. Seriously evil wizard coming through. 11. I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. 12. Slytherins do it on Snape's desk. 13. Voldemort needs prision bitches. 14. Because real friends help you Incendio the bodies. 15. Property of the Half-Blood Prince. 16. We're only wearing black until something darker comes along. 17. Don't hate us beacuse we're beautiful, hate us because we kick your ass at everything. 18. Never wound what can kill you. Hufflepuff (Some of the best people you'll ever meet): 1. I'm planning your death but in a happy way. 2. Brace youself- I'm going to hug you. 3. Nobody ever suspects the Hufflepuff. 4. You may be smarter, cooler, and better, but we still think you suck. 5. You think we're nice? That's cute... 6. Nowhere in the song does it say we're nice. 7. The love of a Hufflepuff was the only love good enough for Neville. 8. Hufflepuff: We kill you with smiles and rainbows. 9. All we got was Cedric... and that didn't turn out so good, did it? 10. Hufflepuffs kick ass too. 11. Hufflepuff: Formerly known as the party house. 12. Hufflepuffs know how to party. 13. Hufflepuff: We have cupcakes. Need we say more? 14. Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much. 15. Hufflepuffs are Particularly good finders. Ravenclaw (The smartest house with the only ones who don't blow themselves up): Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure. 1. I don't need romance, I have goldfish. 2. A room without books is like a body without a soul. 3. I can kill you with my brain. 4. Ravenclaw pride. Be afraid. 5. It's not that we are smarter than you (except it totally is). 6. I'm a Ravenclaw, which clearly means I am elligable to boast about my intellegence level in your face. 7. Ravenclaw: beacuse we know every insult in the book. (Get it, their smart and they know every insult in the book!) 8. Ravenclaw: geeks shall inherit the earth. 9. Ravenclaw: Dangerously over-educated. (Seriously over-educated.) 10. Ravenclaw: Tact enough for people who aren't witty enough to be sarcastic. 11. Ravenclaw: because everyone else is just dumb . 50 ways to annoy voldemort»reviews she's outrageous! she funny! she positively loves annoying voldie! and she's...ALICE! R&R if you love bothering people to the bursting point! it may be over-used, but new ways! c'mon, you know you want to read it! Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 50 - Words: 9,300 - Reviews: 122 - Updated: 6-26-11 - Published: 2-28-11 - Voldemort & OC - Complete not my story but its halariouse What a Boyfriend SHOULD do: When she walks away from you mad, follow her When she stares at your mouth, kiss her When she pushes you or hits you, grab her and don’t let go When she starts cussing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet, she's thinking of how to say I love you. When she ignores you, give her your attention When she pulls away, pull her back When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful When you see her start crying, just hold her and don’t say a word When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared, protect her When she lays her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her When she steals your favorite hat, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night When she teases you, tease her back and make her laugh When she doesn’t answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay When she looks at you with doubt, back yourself up When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand When she grabs at your hands, hold hers and play with her fingers When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes, don’t look away until she does When she misses you, she's hurting inside When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go When she says she's ok, don’t believe it, talk with her, because 10 yrs later she'll remember you Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her, call her before you sleep and after you wake up Treat her like she's all that matters to you Tease her and let her tease you back Stay up all night with her when she's sick Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid Give her the world, let her wear your clothes When she's bored and sad, hang out with her, let her know she's important Kiss her in the pouring rain When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Whose ass am I kicking babe?" Guys aren't Worth your tears, and the one that is won't make you cry. WHY DO BOYS FALL IN LOVE WITH GIRLS?? aww this is so sweet even though im a girl!! :D So sweet, please don't break! :) 1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo. 2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder. 3. How cute they look when they sleep. 4. The ease in which they fit into our arms . 5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world. 6. How cute they are when they eat. 7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while. 8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside. 9. The way they look good no matter what they wear. 10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth. 11. How cute they are when they argue. 12. The way her hand always finds yours. 13. The way they smile. 14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight. 15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later... 16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight. 17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you". 18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you... 19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry. 20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly. 21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt. 22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it). 23. The way they say "I miss you". 24. The way you miss them. 25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore... Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart. Random Poems By ME As the sun rises, the moon must the stars grow brighter, the terror grows. Once Again Once the moon lies down its headOnce the stars can go to bed Once the sun brings new days lightOnce again I draw out of sight Once again the new day comesOnce the song of new days sung Once the moon comes out to shineOnce the sun is out of line Once the stars can come with me Once again I return to thee Once again I try to see Once again I can go with thee Once I see you face to faceOnce I know you cant escape Once I turn to you and seeOnce I know that you love meLaughter Fear is not what it should be,Not the side of harmony. Love is side to hate and fear,Love is short but still is here. Joy is hope, and love, and life,Joy is smart to have inside. Laughter, smiles, joy, and fun,Laughter brings smiles to everyone. Flowers Pink flowers , or a Red Red rose,The choice is hard but now I know. Red flowers, or a Pink Pink rose,Now I know not ether so. My choice is clear on white as snow. One rose I say with babies breath,One white as snow with no regrets. Emotions Hope, love, joy, and fear,Emotions sad and glad are here. Tell me this or that but still,Emotions still are here until. Laughter, smiles, joy, and fun,Anger, fear, and sadness done. As the sun rises, the moon must go. As the stars grow brighter, the terror grows. Once Again Once the moon lies down its head Once the stars can go to bed Once the sun brings new days light Once again I draw out of sight Once again the new day comes Once the song of new days sung Once the moon comes out to shine Once the sun is out of line Once the stars can come with me Once again I return to thee Once again I try to see Once again I can go with thee Once I see you face to face Once I know you cant escape Once I turn to you and see Once I know that you love me Laughter Fear is not what it should be, Not the side of harmony. Love is side to hate and fear, Love is short but still is here. Joy is hope, and love, and life, Joy is smart to have inside. Laughter, smiles, joy, and fun, Laughter brings smiles to everyone. Flowers Pink flowers , or a Red Red rose, The choice is hard but now I know. Red flowers, or a Pink Pink rose, Now I know not ether so. My choice is clear on white as snow. One rose I say with babies breath, One white as snow with no regrets. Emotions Hope, love, joy, and fear, Emotions sad and glad are here. Tell me this or that but still, Emotions still are here until. Laughter, smiles, joy, and fun, Anger, fear, and sadness done. FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall. BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?" FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!" FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you. FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run -- run!" FRIENDS: Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies. FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!" FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "SNAP!" we messed up! FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds bottoms that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell. FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. BEST FRIENDS: Are for life. FRIENDS: Would read ignore this. BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this! Well, I guess I'm a best friend. Are you? WHY DO BOYS FALL IN LOVE WITH GIRLS?? aww this is so sweet even though im a girl!! :D So sweet, please don't break! :) 1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo. 2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder. 3. How cute they look when they sleep. 4. The ease in which they fit into our arms . 5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world. 6. How cute they are when they eat. 7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while. 8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside. 9. The way they look good no matter what they wear. 10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth. 11. How cute they are when they argue. 12. The way her hand always finds yours. 13. The way they smile. 14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight. 15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later... 16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight. 17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you". 18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you... 19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry. 20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly. 21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt. 22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it). 23. The way they say "I miss you". 24. The way you miss them. 25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore... Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed The dead cannot cry out for justice; it is a duty of the living to do so for them. 'For God so loved the world he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world but to save the world through him.' -John 3:16-17. 'For it is by grace that you have been saved through faith, and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works, so that no one can boast.' Ephesians 2: 8-9 If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart. Fear cannot touch me. It can only taunt me, it cannot take me away, just tell me where to go. I can either follow, or stay in my bed. I can hold on to the things that I know. The dead stay dead, they cannot walk. The shadows are darkness. And darkness can’t talk.’- Almost Here When she walks away from you mad, follow her When she stare's at your mouth, Kiss her When she pushes you or hit's you, Grab her and dont let go When she start's cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong When she ignore's you, Give her your attention When she pull's away, Pull her back When you see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful When you see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared, Protect her When she lay's her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her When she steal's your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night When she tease's you, Tease her back and make her laugh When she doesnt answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay When she look's at you with doubt, Back yourself up When she say's that she like's you, she really does more than you could understand When she grab's at your hands, Hold her's and play with her fingers When she bump's into you, bump into her back and make her laugh When she tell's you a secret, keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does When she misses you, she's hurting inside When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything. When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her Call her before you sleep and after you wake up Treat her like she's all that matters to you. Tease her and let her tease you back Stay up all night with her when she's sick Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid Give her the world Let her wear your clothes When she's bored and sad, hang out with her Let her know she's important Kiss her in the pouring rain When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking babe?" If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will : Call you. Kiss you. Love you. Text you
Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up. Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away from them and you have their shoes. If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile. My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it’s gone. I'm the kind of girl who would fall flat on my face, get up, laugh my head off, and say " That was fun! “Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.” “An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.” Life isn’t passing me by, it’s trying to run me over. Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it. Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world? My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil. Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary. Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity? Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hate that. Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper. The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen! Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out. I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it! Don’t follow me, I’m lost too. This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob. Definition of Your Mom: How to answer a question when you’re bored Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas. One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff. I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do kill me? I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate. It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with. It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone. The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER. So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun. When French people swear do they say pardon my English? Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first? If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later? Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’? Why isn’t chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are a vegetable? Life sucks and then you die. Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin? Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down? Why do people say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”? Why would someone get cake if they can’t eat it? “When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade” Don’t mess with me I’ve got a stick. Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!" Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake." Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!" I smile because I have no idea what’s going on! Life was so simple when boys had cooties I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends Boys are like slinkies, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs. I ran with scissors, and lived! You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday. When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n’ slide. I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love. I don’t obsess! I think intensely. Of course I’m talking to myself. Who else can I trust? Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later. One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons! When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing “I’m Off to See the Wizard” when sent to the Headmasters office. I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers. All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies. Stupid shiny Volvo owner. The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you. “When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.” “Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” “Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else” “Real girls aren’t perfect, perfect girls aren’t real.” “I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not.” “What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy.” A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy. I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.” Suicide is Human’s way of saying “You can’t fire me- I quit!” “He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.” “If you know me, chances are you hate me.” Shut up voices or I’ll poke you with a fork If at first you don’t succeed skydiving isn’t for you. Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them. Set sail in a general that way direction. It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it? I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later. Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face? All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative. When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear. Education is important, school however, is another matter. Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go. Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it I'm a part of the ANTI HADES HATERS club, copy and paste on to your profile, add your name to the list SweetyamiyugigirlHappyfish and tell DaughterofPoseidon32498 that you did! GO HADES!! Girl #1- I love Greek Mytholagy Girl #2- I hate mytholagy Girl #1- Do you like to learn? Girl #2- Not really Girl #1- Do you like school? Girl #2- No. Girl #1- Do you like to read? Girl #2- Yes Girl #1- Congrates your one step above moron, two steps above dumass and one step below ideot. But your a hundred miles from smart and a thousend light years from genus. I hate when people say Hades is the devil! If you actully read Greek Myths he is the god of death meaning good and bad people go to him when they die. He is not evil, he is strict but fair. "But he kidnapped Persephone." Well if you were surrounded by the dead all the time wouldnt you want someone to love and one of the most beutiful people to lighten up the place. The underworld probably got lonly and a three headed dog and the dead are not that great of coversaion holder "First, nobody can be like you. You're insane. In fact, insane people even call you insane." -Bakura: Demons and Angels by Zyrx O.o this totally creeped me out and I believe in stuff like this, bad enough, I already think something is my apartment already: This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia WHAT A KISS MEANS Kiss on the stomach = "I'm ready" Kiss on the Forehead = "I hope we're together forever" Kiss on the Ear = "You're my everything" Kiss on the Cheek = "We're friends" Kiss on the Hand = "I adore you" Kiss on the Neck = "we belong together" Kiss on the Shoulder = "I want you" Kiss on the Lips = "I love you" What the gesture means... Holding Hands = "We definitely love each other" Slap on the Butt = "That's mine" Holding on tight = "I don't want to let go" Looking into each other's Eyes = "I just plain love you" Playing with Hair = "Tell me you love me" Arms around the Waist = "I love you too much to let go" Laughing while Kissing = "I am completely comfortable with you" picking someone up off their feet = "That they love them fully and would do anything for them" FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food. REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food. (glares at friends... this is why i take so much food to school, cause i usually end up giving some to you guys anyway...) -This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. -Lucillia FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs. REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM. FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong. REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn, that was fun. Let's do it again!" FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry. REAL FRIENDS: Kick the ass of whatever made you cry. FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back. REAL FRIENDS: Keep your junk so long they forget its yours. FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you. FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you. FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door. REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!” FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile. REAL FRIENDS: Are for life. FAKE FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough. REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say “Come on, drink the rest of that, you know we don’t waste.” FAKE FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you. REAL FRIENDS: Will kick their ass to hell and out! FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world. REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to whats wrong, but help come up with the most vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better! FAKE FRIENDS: Say no when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. REAL FRIENDS: Talk on the phone or come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out. FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it Come on, Harry, let's go on an adventure Wow! You are handmade by God…that is amazing! hi i love dolphins and wolves 20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity: 1: At lunch time, sit in you car with sunglasses on and point a hair dry at passing cars; see if they slow down 2: Page yourself over the intercom. Do not disguise your voice. 3: Every time some one asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that 4: Put you garbage can on your desk and label it "IN" 5: Put decaf in the coffee maker (home or work). When everyone gets over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso 6: In your memo book, on all your checks, put "FOR SMUGGLING DIAMONDS" 7: Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance To The Prophecy" 8: Dont use any punctuation 9: As often as possible, skip instead of walking 10: Order diet water whenever you go out with a serious face 11: Specify that your drive-thru order is "TO GO" 12: Sing along at the opera 13: Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme 14: Put mosquito netting around your work area (or room) and play tropical sounds all day 15: 5 days in advance, tell your friend that you can't go to their party cause you don't 'feel like it' 16: Have friends or coworkers address you by your wrestling name "Rock Bottom" 17: When the cash comes out of the ATM yell, "I WON, I WON" 18: When exiting the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives they're loose" 19: Tell your children (or younger sibling) that "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go" 20: And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity is... Copy this and put it on your profile VERY overdone... Read anyway? You studied with Hermione. You stumbled with Ron. You hid creatures with Hagrid. You laughed with Fred and George. You fought with Voldemort. You forgot with Neville. You got caught with the DA. You rebelled against Umbridge and Snape. You cheered on Gryffindor and wept over cedric . You kept up the rivalry with Draco Malfoy and the Slytherins. You wanted to kill Dumbledore. You stuck with Harry til the end. Now it’s nearly over, and now all you can do is remember, and thank J.K. Rowling for the time of your life. REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile): 1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate too) 2. Meet the recruitment bunny! 3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body! 4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me, people: MWA HAHAHAHA cough cough! 5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guys! 6. One word: UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself... Now that's the life! 7. Money, Money, Money : Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys? 8. WORLD DOMINATION! BEST reason! On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!) On a package of pasta after the cooking insturctions: "Put on fork and eat." (No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!) On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?) On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's just a suggestion!) On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! you lose!) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?) On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds with colds off those fork lifts.) On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!) On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.) On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..) On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.) On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.) On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (but no peas?) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..) On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Raise your hand if you've tried this.) On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.) On a pack of waterballons: Children under 8 years can choke or suffocate or broken ballons. (So if i'm older than 8 i won't choke.) The sorting hat says that I belong in hufflepuff! Said Gryffindor, "We'll teach all those with brave deeds to their name."Students of Gryffindor are typically brave, daring, and chivalrous. Famous members include Harry, Ron, Hermione, Albus Dumbledore (head of Hogwarts), and Minerva McGonagall (head of Gryffindor). the sorting hat said i should go in all houses but i demanded hufflepuff cause there an awesome house and are very loyale not oh i love you one day hate you the next like the rest of hogwarts I do love the Twilight Saga, but after reading Fanfic's, the books seem rather basic and boring to me now. Hello people! :) Just a warning, my updates may become more distant because I'm revising and studying for my exams and are sitting them in a few weeks. Please can people lay off the IM's about me updating! I have enough people cramming texts and work down my throat as it is! I come on here to relax... Relax people, no get bombarded with messages threateneding bodily harm if I don't update immediately! Anyway, that was my vent. I do now have a blog though - h t t p : / / elementofmind . blogspot . com / Of course without all the spaces. If any of you want updates about any of the stories just post something on there. I'll post my progress and you may realise why I'm taking so long with my writing... xxxx Strange and random things that made me laugh... Two men walk into a bar, The third one ducks. Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright. Boys are like slinkeys. Useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs. Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust? One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. I'm not afraid of Death, what's it gonna do kill me? If two wrongs don't make a right...try three. Don't knock on death's door, ring the doorbell and run- he hates that! My knight in shining turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil. It's better to keep quiet and let someone think you're stupid, than to open your mouth and prove it. It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt...then it's hilarious If you talk about me i got some advice. click your heels 3 times and say 'i wish i had a life'! OMG! i think i just saw a flying bird! let me write that down in my 'things i dont really give f about' notebook. yea you have the right to your own opinion, but i have the right to think your stupid. i speak fluent sarcasm. are yhu stoned or just stupid.! I don't obsess, I think intensely! I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it! "Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? i just want to know who the hell is drinking my damn soda." I dream of a better world...where chickens can cross roads without having their morals questioned. "The greener grass on the other side is probably just artificial turf." "Nobody move! I dropped my brain." "If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried." Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice? When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear. Education is important; school however, is another matter. I had my soul removed to make room for sarcasm and I don't regret it. Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up. Hello. You have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are, where you are from, and what you want so there is no need to leave a message. Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them. I got an A in philosophy because I proved my professor doesn’t exist. If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either. Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are the same number of letters? There are no stupid questions – just a bunch of inquisitive idiots. Politics is war without bloodshed. War is politics with bloodshed. High School Musical 3 and Saw V were the two top movies at the box office when they opened. One depicted gruesome on screen torture. The other was about a guy with a saw. It takes 47 muscles to frown, 13 to smile and absolutely none to sit there with a dumb look on your face. People say satire is dead. It’s not dead. It’s alive and living in the White House. I’m not afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens. I do not deny everything! Sometimes the mind, for reasons we do not necessarily understand, just decides to go into storage. Isn't it ironic . . . we ignore those who adore us, adore those who ignore us, hurt those who love us, and love those who hurt us Don't follow in my footsteps . . . I run into walls. Do you want to know why I'm still on earth? Heaven kicked me out and hell is afraid I'll take over... Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling? The road to success is always under construction. If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button. Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement. Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate. No I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me. I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide. Basic Definitions of Science: If it's green or wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics. When the going gets tough, the tough get duct tape Don't take life to serously, no one gets out alive anyway I stopped fighting my inner demons... We're on the same side now! SHUT UP VOICES!! or I'll poke you with the Q-tip again... If Barbie's So Popular, Why Do You Have To Buy Her Friends Life's Greatest Pleasure Is Doing What People Tell You Not To Do Never Go To A Doctor Whose Office Plants Have Died Everyone Is Entitled To Their Own Opinion, It Just That Your's Is Stupid Man Invented Language To Satisfy Their Deep Need To Complain Magic is the stuff Science hasn't made boring yet! What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.' "Obstacles are put in our way to see if what we want is really worth fighting for." "Don't fall for someone unless they're willing to catch you." "If you don't understand my silence, then you won't understand my words." Forgive your enemies - it messes with their heads :P I wouldn't have OCD if everyone else would just do things the right way. People that don't know me think I'm quiet. People that do wish I was. Sarcasm. It's easier than actually having to deal with stupid people. If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side. Something else that i laughed at :D Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Frito's! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future? If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable? Why is it the TWELVE days of Christmas when there is only one day of Christmas? Why is "number" abbreviated as "no"? When there is no "o" in number? Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems? Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey? If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile? When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do you call a girl that is named after her mother? 364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that? Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do? More funny things i found :D These aren't mine by the way XD 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. 3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. 5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. 6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong. 7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog. 8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. 9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those who got there first. 10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. 11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. 12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. 13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. 15. The day you don't wash your hair is the day you meet a cute boy. Even more stuff that made me think and laugh at the same time :D Do not run in the school hall, gliding is more fun. Officer, I swear to Drunk I am not God! When life gives you lemons, spit the lemons in life's eyes. Enjoying the "Great Outdoors" would be better if it were great. When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it. My heart? Yeah. It's not a playground. Tears wash the windows of our souls so we can see ourselves more clearly. -Exodus 19:5 Oops! I appear to have fallen on your lips. We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls our good at one thing: Staying Strong. Arguing with yourself is normal. It's when you argue with yourself and lose that's weird. Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee getting bigger?" Then I get hit in the face. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit! (OMC! Carlisle!) Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it all. And then some you don't want. -Daughtry Of course it's in the last place you look for it. Why in hell would you keep looking for it if you already found it. When you get caught looking at him, just remember he was looking back. You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. Whoever said "Nothing's impossible" never tried slamming a revolving door. Silence is golden but duck tape is silver You know it's a bad day when you fall out of bed and you miss the floor. Behind every bitch there's a guy that made her that way. Having the love of your life say "We can still be friends" is like having your dog die, and your mom say you can still keep it. I called your boyfriend gay, and he hit me with his purse. Dance like no one's watching. Sing like no one's listening. Sometimes you've got to smile and walk away... Hold your tears in and pretend like you're okay. Being mature is overrated. Being weird is like being normal, only better. I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me. I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun. Anyone can reach the stars. If you can't reach them, catch one that falls. Labels are for cans, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a can! Don't yawn in the shower. You might drown. -Bill Cosby I was gifted but the psychiatrist took away my super powers. Slinky Escalator = Endless fun Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up. Therapist = The/rapist (scary thought -shudder-) Excuse me. Have you seen my sanity? I think I've lost it... I used to care, but I take a pill for that now. I call you squishy and you shall be mine. You will be my squishy! -Dory from Finding Nemo I can resist anything but temptation. They say, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Well, I think the gun helps. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people. One day we're going to look back at this, laugh nervously, then change the subject. When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip 'n slide. I don't obsess, I think intensely. Evening news is where they say, "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it's not. Funny !! 24 Things I owe to my Mother 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you two are going to kill each other, at least do it outside. I just finished cleaning!" 2. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week." 3. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." 4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you aren't coming to the store with me!" 5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident. 6. My mother taught IRONY. "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about." 7. My mother taught me about THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!" 8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!" 9. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 10. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "Your room looks like a tornado went through there!" 11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!" 12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it too!" 13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!" 14. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children around the world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!" 15. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home!" 16. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You're going to get it when we get home!" 17. My mother taught me about MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way!" 18. My mother taught me about ESP. "Put your sweater on! Don't you think I know when you're cold?" 19. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When the lawnmower cuts off you toes, don't come crying to me!" 20. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 21. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 22. My mother taught me about MY ROOTS. "Shut that door! Do you think you were raised in a barn?" 23. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you're my age, you'll understand." 24. My mother taught me JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!" It's funny how 'hello' is always accompanied with 'goodbye'. It's funny how good memories always make you cry. It's funny how forever never seems to really last. It's funny how'd much you'd lose if you forgot your past. It's funny how "friends" can just leave you when your down. It's funny how when you need someone they're never around. It's funny how people forgive, even when they can't forget. It's funny how one night, can contain so much regret. It's funny how ironic life turns out to be. But the funniest part of all? None of that's funny to me. by Unknown Twilight Oath I promise to remember Bella Each time I carelessly fall down And I promise to remember Edward Whenever I'm out of town I promise to obey traffic laws For Charlies sake of course And I promise to remember Jacob When my heart fills with remorse I promise to remember Carlisle When ever I am in the Emergency Room And I promise to remember Emmett Every time there's a huge boom I promise to to remember Rose Whenever I see someone that holds pure beauty And I promise to remember Alice When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me I promise to remember Nessie When I see that beautiful curly hair And I promise to remember Esme When someone tells me they care I promise to remember Jasper Whenever my emotions are unfurled And I promise to remember the Volturi When someone speaks of dominating the world Yes I promise to love Twilight Wherever I may go So that all may see my obsession Because I know what the Twilighters know If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile. If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball. Copy and paste this into your profile The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, when I grew up I was BLACK, when I'm sick I'm BLACK, when I go into the sun I'm BLACK, when I'm cold I'm BLACK, when I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, when you're born you're PINK, when you grow up you're WHITE, when you're sick, you're GREEN, when you go in the sun you turn RED, when you're cold you turn BLUE and when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored? Post this on your profile if you hate racism. If you want world peace, a brighter future, and more chocolate, paste this into your profile. If you've ever laughed so hard tears streamed down your face, you banged your head repeatedly on a table, and received weird looks from everyone in the immediate vicinity, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile. If there are time when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer. You're a 90's kid if: You can finish this 'ice ice _' If you are against all form's of animal abuse and don't agree with the Fur trade and cutting down forrests which are home to an indiginous or rare species post this on your page!! If you are against cock fighting, dog fighting, hunting and mistreatment of Animals and think people who enjoy these sports are sick and cruel post this on your page!! REMEMBER WHEN .. pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer. Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now i heard there was a secret cord that david played and it pleased the Lord but you dont really care bout music do ya it goes like this the 4th the 5th the minor fall and the major lift the baffled king composing hallelughya Isn't it funny that when you go to the shops with your friends you look down at the girl with black jeans and studs but smile at the girl wearing a mini with a tshirt that barely cover anything? Isn't it funny you can change your music taste to impress a guy but when it comes to a girl who likes her own music and her own style, you give her a mouthful? ISN'T IT FUNNY that a guy can get away with being a gangsta but the emo gets a mouthful from everyone? are you laughing? Isn't it funny a emo can be quiet all through the week but gets more shit from everyone than the girl who sleeps around and sells her virginity? ISN'T IT FUNNY that you don't mind your friends drinking, smoking but the minute someone mentions emo music you can give them a lecture on melodramatic teenage outcasts? I'm not laughing. ITS SO FUNNY that you and your friends can make a girls life hell and not know anything about the silent battle she might be fighting. ISN'T IT FUNNY that you can call emo's, punks, goths the retards but still manage to get through your day without an inch of guilt in your heart. HOW YOU CAN CALL A GIRL A POSER, HOW CAN YOU SAY "YOUR NOT EMO" OR "ATTENTION SEEKER" WITHOUT SPENDING A SECOND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THERE ARE CUTS ON HER WRISTS AND WHY SHE SPENDS HER LUNCHTIMES CRYING INSTEAD OF LAUGHING WITH HER FRIENDS? KEEP ON LAUGHING! isn't it funny you can say and do all this without any idea of what is going on in this persons life without knowing her situation with her friends or her family or her LIFE! BRAVE ISN'T GOING UP ON STAGE AND STRIPPING! BRAVE IS NOT SAYING A SPEECH OR DUMPING YOUR BOYFRIEND! BRAVE IS GOING TO SCHOOL ON MUFTI DAY AND NOT FOR A SECOND CARE WHAT THE WORLD AROUND YOU IS SAYING ABOUT YOUR CLOTHES. ITS LISTENING TO YOUR OWN MUSIC AND BEING PROUD OF IT! ITS GOING THROUGH EVERY DAY WITH THE THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO YOUR FACE AND BEHIND YOUR BACK AND YOU STILL KEEP QUIET. ITS KNOWING WHAT YOUR "FRIENDS" ARE SAYING ABOUT YOU AND STILL CALLING THEM YOUR FRIENDS! BRAVE IS KNOWING THAT TOMORROW ISN'T A BRIGHT AND HAPPY FUTURE ITS ANOTHER DAY OF COMPLAINING AND DODGING RUMORS! KEEP ON LAUGHING. if you agree put this on your profile and advise others to do the same If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Archangel's Requiem, Lady Sakura of the Fated,Soul Stance, Raven Wolfmoon, iheartmwpp, dracosnumber1girl, SMARTALIENQT, Luthien Saralonde, Xiaahandrus, Zenerific1, narutoyaoifan(everyday for the last 3 months), Ryu Pendragon, CindyPanther (Everyday since I found fanfiction), JasperAlecLuver (Same as CindyPanther. Everyday since I found fanfiction), Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat. Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy that kisses your forehead, who keeps your picture in his wallet, who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants, who holds your hand in front of all his friends, who thinks your beautiful without makeup, one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you, THE one who turns to his friends and says THAT'S HER! !eliforp ruoy otni siht etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI Bella: Do I ever cross your mind? Jasper: No Bella: Do you like me? Jasper: No Bella: Do you want me? Jasper: No Bella: Would you cry if I left? Jasper: No Bella: Would you live for me? Jasper: No Bella: Would you do anything for me? Jasper: No Bella: Choose--me or your life Jasper: My life Bella runs away in shock and pain and Jasper runs after her and says... The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life. If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile If you suffer any of these paste them on your profile!:- FMDSS is Future Mrs Damon Salvatore Syndrome TVDTSF is The Vampire Diaries Teams Shouldn't Fight ILDAIKI is I Love Damon And I Know It If you were going to cry when Damon almost died in Season 1 Finale Copy and Paste this onto your profile! AV is Addicted to Vampires WIWAVS is Wishing I Was A Vampire Syndrome DSISS Damon Salvatore Is Sexy Syndrome MTISWDS is My Tv Is Sad Without Damon Syndrome Hush, little sister Please don't cry I wish I could be there To sing you a lullaby I can see your arms Bloodied and bruised That's strange, little sister Mine were like that too I know you scream When Daddy's there Hush, little sister I know you're scared I can see the way He's hurting you I'm sorry, little sister He did that to me too I know that people Ignore what's going on at home That makes me angry, little sister You shouldn't have to be alone Hey, little sister You wanna know why I'm not there? It's a sad story, little sister But people should care You see, little sister One day Daddy got high You were asleep in your crib So you didn't hear my cry He screamed at me And smashed my head against the door While you slept, little sister I died on the floor You know, little sister I don't think that I would have died If someone had only bothered To listen to my cries But hush, little sister Daddy's coming home Quick, get into bed You don't want him to find you alone I'm sorry little sister He's in a bad mood Run while you can Uh oh little sister He's lifting his belt Scream while you can, little sister Call for help Hush little sister You don't need to cry No one can hurt you You're in my arms tonight. --Unknown. CHILD ABUSE IS SICK AND WRONG. PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE IF YOU FEEL THE SAME WAY. I have a sudden feeling to say something random. Thumbs up if you like the Cookie Monster! Om nom nom nom! Elmo rocks too! ONE DAY A DAD COMES HOME DRUNK AND MAD. HE PULLS OUT A GUN AND SHOOTS HIS WIFE AND THEN TURNS THE GUN ON HIMSELF. HIS LITTLE GIRL SITS BEHIND THE COUCH CRYING. THE POLICE CAME AND TOOK THE LITTLE GIRL TO A NEW FAMILY. HER FIRST DAY TO SUNDAY SCHOOL SHE WALKS INTO THE BUILDING AND SEES A PICTURE OF JESUS ON THE CROSS. THE LITTLE GIRL ASKS THE TEACHER: How did that man get off the cross? THE TEACHER REPLIED: He never did. THE LITTLE GIRL ARGUED: Yes he did when mommy and daddy fought he sat next to me behind the couch telling me everything was gonna be alright... 66 of u won't repost this. BUT REMEMBER THE BIBLE SAID, ''DENY JESUS IN FRONT OF YOUR FRIENDS AND I WILL DENY YOU IN FRONT OF MY FATHER."Repost this IF YOUR NOT ASHAMED. Let God's love spread At least 90% of humans would not run down the halls of School screaming 'OH MY JASHIN! JASPER IS COMING!' because you gave yourself a papercut on your finger. If you are part of the 10% who would (and I love you if you would) copy & paste this onto your profile and add your name to the list: AkatsukiAngel1, macymay201, JasperAlecLuver Team Jasper- He can snap at me anytime Team Emmett- He's my big teddy bear! Team Jasper- "the one who looks like he's in pain" Team Emmett- I'd fall a million times to get a laugh outta him Team Jasper- He knows how I fell. Team Emmett- He's my "Monkey Man" Team Jasper and Emmett- Because Edward doesn't have what it takes to bite me "Fall again Bella?"- Emmett Cullen "You are worth it."- Jasper Whitlock Hale "Let me dance with my little sister. This might be my last time to make her blush."- Emmett "You're monopolising the bride."- Emmett Sod that, I'm moving to Forks. Bog off. Team Jasper always wins. What's the only thing scarier than a rabid fangirl? A crowd of rabid fangirls. Is that a wand in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me? Forks is real people. Accept it. Navel Officer Brittany of Jasper Whitlock's new Born Army Troop number 0001 I'm betting on Alice, unless she leaves Jasper. Then I'm betting I get Jasper. Bella picks Edward. Rose saves Emmett.. Alice, nope she doesn't deserve Jasper. Hince the reason I'm taking him instead. Summitt Entertainment: You mean to tell me that JACKSON RATHBONE could have been Edward but instead you let some ingnoramice director cast Robpattz bcuz he and Kstew can make out on a bed? Way to throw my love for Edward down the drain more. Jackson Rathbone: The real Edward Cullen Kellan Lutz: Yeah, he can be Carlile in the Twilight remakes, but untill then I'll take him as my own personal Emmett who is required to hug me everyday and tell me he loves me. You say Jackson I say Edward! Jackson! Edward! Jackson! Edward! Why can't my dreams be recognized! Soooo Alice told me if I stood here long enough Jasper would fall from the sky, cover me with kisses, and then marry me.. I've been waiting since the movie version of Twilight came out.. Where is he? Edward Cullen: Obssesive, overcontroling, vampire stalker or loving boyfriend? You decide. You see children, Cedric didn't die, he simple ran to Forks, Washington, convienced Carlisle Cullen to turn him into a vampire, and changed his name to Edward Cullen. Don't believe me? Read/Watch Twilight. Rose isn't you're angel Emmett! I am! Jasper and I got into a tickle fight! I let him win because I wanted those kisses Emmett promised the loser! Edward told me he could read my thoughts, so I let him have a piece of my mind, "you iagnoramice! you left bella and let her fall for a dog then decided, "oh boy I'm gonna kill myself! In Italy!" Idiot.. Although, I do give you mad props for deciding on Italy and the Volturi." Can you say Edward? (screams: Jackson Rathbone!) I had a dream. Jackson Rathbone was Edward and I was Bella; then I woke up.. I wish I didn't. I had a dream about Edward, luckily I woke up and realized Jasper was the one I should dream about. If only Jake was a vampire.. Then he'd be perfect. Oh wait, perfection already exsist and his name is NOT Edward Anthony Mason Cullen. It's Jasper Whitlock Hale Cullen. Emmett's the strongest, Edward's the fastest, but Jasper can sit in a corner all by himself and still make everyone feel jealous. Because I'm the weird kid, and always will be. Because I never give up on dreams. Because I have an over active imagination. Because I want to be different. Because I'm a fangirl. Because I dance like I can when I can't. Because I'm in love with Jackson Rathbone/ Jasper Whitlock. Because I wish I were an amazing author. Because I'm religous. Because I like Spanish love poetry. Because I'm a romantic. Because I love British Accents. Because I read. Because I'm a fanpire. Because I invented the word "bitchwolf" to describe Leah. Because I never said you had to like me. Because I like the Spanish language. Because I play the piano, the flute, and sing. Because I love English. Because I love love. Because I write. Because this is who I am. "Dude, where's my phone?! Like seriously? I just had it, I swear!" "Caaallm down." "How can I be calm? I can't find my phone!" "Dude, you're talking to me on your phone right now!" Brunette: HIDE! THERE'S A SERIAL KILLER ON THE LOOSE!!! Blonde: OH NO!!!! *runs to kitchen* Brunette: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? Blonde: HIDING MY FRUIT LOOPS! WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE IM DOING! (Hehe, no offense to you Blondes out there) Don't you hate it when you're texting lying down on your bed and all of a sudden your phone decides to be ninja and slips through your hands and attacks your face? A student comes to a young professor's office. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean.." she whispers, "..I would do ANYTHING!!" He returns her gaze. "Anything??" "Yes,.. Anything!" She says. His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you.. study??" A good friend would go to the drug store to buy you a pregnancy test but a best friend would stand outside the bathroom door yelling, "NAME IT AFTER ME!" Teacher: "Have you done your homework?" Student: "Have you graded my test?" Teacher: "No, I have other student's stuff to grade" Student: "I have other teacher's homework to do" "Yesterday was Thursday, today it is Friday, tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterward"...thank god she pointed it out to us, we'd never have known... Grandpa: When i was your age my momma would send me down to the store with $1 and I would come back with 5 bags of potatoes 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk a box of tea and 6 eggs but you cant do that these days too many stupid security cameras. No wonder Rebbecca Black didn't take the bus.. with all the seating options she would of had a f*king panic attack.. Teacher: "I'm calling your parents!" Elementary Student: NOOOOOO,"I'll be good!" Middle School Student: "Pshhh,whatever!" High School Student: "Hahaha tell my mom I said Hi!" :P Katy Perry's living her Teenage Dream.. Travis McCoy's is a Billionaire.. While Justin Bieber is having a Baby. "You're kid'll have days, days that used to at some point, in that vacation of his only came every million days when the wind was just right and you were real lucky. Days that were so, so blessed because of something we take for granted" Ares said shakily, "Because on these days… nobody died at all. On these days everybody lived" "I don't understand" I whispered, wishing almost that Ares would stop, that Ares would become the loud violent man we knew and expected. "Kid's been places, places you don't come back from not broken. Places that no matter how much or far you run, no matter how long you spend thinking you escaped… you don't ever come back from" Ares sat down and crosses his legs. This was clearly all he was going to say on the matter A small part of my brain cheered. Welcome back, time to lock and load ba-by. Bigger than that, it was time to put on a show… without being noticed at all. If I was lucky, dear Goddess let me be lucky. this next one is for ALL people who support your country's troops you stay up for 16 hours. we stay up for days on end. you take a warm shower to help you wake up. we go a week without running water. you complain of a 'headache' and call in sick. we get shot at as others are hit and we keep moving forward. you talk about your buddies that aren't with you. we knoe we may never see any of ours again. you complain about how hot it is. we wear our heavy gear, not daring to take off our helmet to wipe our forehead. you get mad at your waiter for getting your order wrong. we dont get to eat today. your mad that class got held over 5 minutes. we're told we will be held over an extra 2 months. you roll your eyes when you baby cries. he gets a letter with pictures of his new baby and wonders if they'll ever meet. if you dont copy and paste this, something bad will happen to you. we'll see just how concieted you relly are. copy and paste this if you support yous country's (or any country's) troops. Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school, he told his friends that it was cool , and when he pulled the trigger back It shot with a great crack! Mummy I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye, I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another, and all because he got the gun from his older brother Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much, and please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush And tell my little sister that she is the only one now, and tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest, mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class, and never to forget this and please don't let this pass Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this, mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try, I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest, but mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest, mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack Mummy listen to me if you would, I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new, I guess I'm not going with daddy, on that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress Mummy I wanted to live, but mummy I must go now the time is getting late Mummy tell my Chris, I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date , I love you mummy I always have, I know you know it's true Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you", In memory of the Columbian students that were lost Please if you would, pass this around, I'd be happy if you could Don't smash this on the ground, if you pass this on, maybe people will cry Just keep this in heart, for the people that didn't get to say "goodbye" Most people would be offended if someone asked what was wrong with their mind. Copy in paste this into your profile if you'd be one of the few that would answer, "where to begin" 98 of teenagers have participated in underaged drinking and drugs. If you're one of the 2 who hasn't, copy this into your profile wearing a smirk of pride. If you have ever been called a bookworm and are proud of it copy and paste this into your profile. Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile. Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end reading fanfiction copy and paste this onto your profile He going to do the right and noble thing" Hades sighed. Everyone looked at him strange. "I get where he is going" Zeus said. "If it one thing I learned from my nephew is that he terribly loyal and he sacrifice everything from family. He so much like Poseidon he would jump off a cliff to save his family" Zeus and Hades explained. Poseidon smiled. "No, if you two won't jump off cliff I won't jump after you" Poseidon said. His brothers stared at him. In a way of saying " I was going jump with you if you fell but now no." You let me finish "I go to the bottom of the cliff to catch you and tell you who wrong it is to be suicidal" the three brothers smiled at each other. Hestia was smiling this was true family. "You can be sure that the American spirit will prevail over this tragedy." --Colin Powell
"Terrorist attacks can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of America. These acts shatter steel, but they cannot dent the steel of American resolve. America was targeted for attack because we are the brightest beacon for freedom and opportunity in the world. And no one will keep that light from shining." --President George W. Bush "The future does not belong to the faint-hearted, it belongs to the brave." --President Ronald Reagan Quotes provided by RikuTakahashi IF YOU HAVE MADE IT TO THE BOTTEM OF THIS PROFILE WITHOUT LAUGHING OR SMILING OR CRYING THERE HAS GOT TO BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU AND IF YOU COULDNT STOP LAUGHING HERE HAVE A METAL BECAUSE IM LAUGHING SMILING AND OR CRYING WITH YOU . THANK YOU |
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