Name: Rfwp Ijsyts

Hobbies: Reading (Fanfiction), playing (video and board games), watching YouTube, sitting on my ass, sleeping.

Likes: ...I don't know, I like a lot of things... Cute things I suppose.

Dislikes: More things than I like, I can tell you that much

Everything you need to know about me: I'm almost always bored. I don't like you, you don't like me, I don't like you, you like my writing or something, because you're on my profile.

Now have a list of things that some writers do that I absolutely fucking despise.

In time travel stories, some people send the main character back in time with all their powers, scars, and all that jazz. WHY?! I'd understand the MC having their memories, after all, there'd be no point if they didn't have at least an echo of their memories, but why their scars? And the abilities they haven't even gotten yet? It's like the writer said "Fuck it! Let's shrink the fucker, then pop 'em into the past! It'll all be good with no questions!"

No choice. Do you fucking know the sheer number of times I've run across this fucking phrase? "I guess I have no choice but to tell you my ultimate secret." This is fucking stupid! There is ALWAYS a choice. Burger Kings; Fries, chicken tenders, burger. White Castle; Sliders, Fries, Mac-N-Cheese Nuggets. Gun to your head; Accept your fate, run, fight back, spit, break your arm for no reason. Time travel; LIE, FIGHT BACK SO YOU DON'T GET FORCED INTO ANSWERING, DON'T BE A DUMBASS. There is always a second or third option, so it's stupid when I hear "No choice." Unless there's a god controlling your body, you have a choice.

Break into Caps Lock. Okay, so I do this myself, so I'll admit that I understand the temptation of trying to stress words, but I mean those shit-wheedles that have entire conversations in Caps, or have their story characters break into Caps. It's one thing to do it when you're narrating or whatever this would be considered, like when it's me, the writer, to you, the reader, or when the writer starts talking about the characters and events in like a third person thing, but then there are those fucks who Caps Lock the words inside of quotation marks. There is NEVER a good reason to use Caps inside of the quotation marks that represent the character talking! That is literally the entire reason the exclamation mark exists in the first fucking place!

"How are you still sane?" Can you guess? Can you guess why I hate this? It's because, dummy, this, is fucking, spoon-fed drama. It's just so fucking FORCED! It's cringy at best, story crippling at worst. It's like the writer is actually saying to you; "Feel bad for all the things he's gone through, and know it made him cool." Meanwhile I'm over here thinking how stupid it is! Show the reader the cracks in his walls! Show them what the MC had to go through! Don't just 'say' they're cool, or beautiful, or whatever! Fucking explain to us what they're like and we'll connect the damn dots. Not to mention, this is insulting to the person being asked, as it insinuates that they have a weak-will, not to mention as far as they know, he IS insane. You know what's worse? I almost always hear this from the gods when they appear to the MC. Here is how it goes for me; "The MC has had a traumatic past, and then he died, and now he has a goddes in front of him. She secretly wants to suck his wee wee but cant because she is in love with someone else but then she asks 'why are you sad' then she puts her hand on his head and reads his mind and blushes and asks 'how are you still sane.'"This is the fucking quality I perceive stories to have once I hear "how are you even sane?" It's just a fucking keyword that sends me off my fucking handles.

A single tear. Okay, so this isn't the worst one ever, but it's a tad overly-dramatic for me. I love drama, the whole world does, but when it's as forced as this, it hurts a bit more than it should, and for all the wrong reasons. Now if it's used in a comical sense, like; "As she flailed and knocked over his food, which he had painstakingly spent hours on, cutting, arranging, recutting, rearranging, and cooking, he shed one, single tear." It's those that make me smile, but fucking this?! "As he thought about his dead parents who he'd never meet, he shed a single tear." This shit is so forced! Okay, look. I don't want super realistic anything, I don't want a 1,000,000 word story with hundreds of people machinating against the MC or whatever, but I expect a level of realsim. No one sheds single tears except for attention hogs and people lacking properly formed tear-ducts. I don't want single tears, or people talking in the middle of fighting yet no one biting their tongue, I don't want first-try prodigies, it's all just fucking stupid.

Treating the reader like they're retarded and explaining the baiscs to them. "He whistled with his lips." How fucking else would he whistle, jackass? "He walked with his feet." Not touching this, but you see what's wrong. "He punched him in the face with his left fist." Okay, so first off, we don't need to know where you punched him, we imagine where the person is punched and it sounds like a cooler senario when it is left to us to imagine. Runs smoother. Now why did we need to know about which hand he was using? We also don't need to know his hand is balled up into a fist, because you can't punch someone with an open hand.

Fun facts:

1) My profile picture was actually something I drew on Microsoft paint.

2) My profile picture was originally meant to be the picture for my YouTube account.

2) I am the most accepting of different people in my household.

4) Fact 3's number is 2.

5) Fact 3 and 2 being a duplicate was an accident and now I'm making a joke about it.

6) When I duplicated the numbers, you looked.

7) If you aren't completely numb to the internet and its childish jokes, you smiled.

8) If you are numb to the internet, you still smiled because I just called you out.

9) Fact number 10 is coming up.

10) This is fact number 10, and any OCD people are still obsessing over the lack of fact 3. Move on man, that was like a solid two minutes ago, it's the past.

11) I'm a dick.

12) The name I have set at the top of the bio is actually my name, but I used a puzzle cypher thingy. It's pretty much coded, but not really.

12) This is fact 13, but I'm still not using the '3' button when behind a parenthesis.

14) I don't know if it's proper grammar to capitalize the 'A' in 'And' when beginning a sentence with the word.

15) I don't know if it's proper grammar to even start a sentence with the word 'and'.

16) I don't know if the word 'and' is actually a word or something else the shitty english language came up with.

17) I don't know if I'm supposed to capitalize 'english', but just to piss someone off, I'm going to do both. English.

18) The last four facts have started with "I don't know if".

19) Fact 18 broke that combo. It's a c-c-c-c-c-c-COMBO BREAKER!

20) Fact 19 references a game I've never heard of.

21) As an American, my week starts on a Sunday instead of the rest of the world's Monday.

22) It was on 8/17/2016 that the idea for the first weekly poll came to mind.

22) Still not using the '3' button to start off.

24) The first weekly question came to me when I was pooping. That is why it is about breathing poop.

25) 8/17/2016 was a Wednesday. That means it was four days after it's creation that I posted it.

26) It was four days because the poll was made at 3 A.M. and had it been made later, I would have said the proper 'three days'.

27) The first weekly poll was an idea to help me and my readers get to know each other better. I'd say it failed, but this was written before I opened it.

28) This fact was supposed to be about something else, but I forgot.

29) I was born with an addiction to flavored and carbonated drinks. You could call it 'soda' or 'pop' but meh.

29) This is fact 30.

29) I just realized that getting through facts 30 - 39 is going to be a bitch. And a lot of the number 29.

65) I just noticed I fucked up and put 63 in the place of 64.

66) The 65th fact was supposed to be about the time I bent a needle while it was inside of my arm.

67) When I started this profile update, there were only 20 fun facts.

68) Now there are almost 70 facts and half of them are about most of the things that have gone wrong in my life.

69) Huehehehe, anyone who noticed the number was probably expecting a sex joke.

70) Both you and me are weirdos no matter how normal you think you are.

71) Facts 31 - 63 were too personal to keep on, so I deleted them