So, hey peeps! Thanks for checking me out (in a totally non-creepy way...right?)

Some favs... (these are in no particular order - except for Batman and Star Wars)

TV shows: Star Wars: the Clone Wars, any Batman, Young Justice, NCIS, Smallville, Justice League, Teen Titans, Scooby-Doo

Movies: Star Wars, Batman (I'm working on convincing my mom to let me watch the Dark Knight), Captain America (Got the movie for my b-day!), Green Lantern, Harry Potter, Sherlock Holmes

Books: Star Wars, Alex Rider, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Hardy Boys, James Bond

Food (I'm a vegetarian): veggie burgers, crackers and hummus, candy!!!

Color: Blue and Orange, or Black and Purple

My blog: bumblingbat. tumblr. com

I'll try to keep it updated, and I may put sneak peeks for some of the stories on there.

A note to everyone for this summer and next school year: The tenth graders at my school have to do an 8 month long project called a Personal Project (we'll call it PP). My PP is going to be writing a book, which will get published hopefully by next summer, assuming I finish it fast enough (or at all). This will cut into my FanFiction writing time, but I love encouragement! I'm sure many of y'all would love it. It's going to be about an assassin with amnesia. I'll post the full summary on my website.

I've realized that I have, like, five stories going at once and none of them are moving very fast. So, I'm going to work on one story at a time so that they get finished. So, here's the order they're gonna get finished in:

1.) SAS Are Never Far Away

2.) Some Heroes Come in Small Sizes

3.) He's Back (I took over this story from DenniBenni)

4.) Robin Through Time

5.) Meet the Mutants (I don't really know how many people like this story...I'm not getting a ton of feedback)

I might work on any of these stories if I get writer's block on a different one, but for now, you probably shouldn't expect frequent updates on any stories except for Navy SEALs/SAS.

A little clarity and explanation for what is going on in everyone's lives in Some Heroes Come in Small Sizes:

Alex Rider: He works for the SAS. He is currently doing joint training with the Navy SEALs, so the Riders moved to the United States temporarily. In his first month there, the CIA heard that he was in the US and asked him to train one of their spies. He doesn't normally work for any government agencies, but if they approach him with a job, he will consider it. He has worked with almost a dozen different agencies. He has mentioned his teenage years in passing to his children, but they think he just worked for the government.

Trixie Rider: The wife of Alex, she was the reason for Alex's return to humanity. She was killed in a drive-by shooting that was intended for Alex.

Didi Rider: The daughter of Alex Rider, she has been trained in the same way that Ian Rider trained Alex. She's really quiet and mellow. Her boyfriend usually protects her at school, but when he isn't there, her brother takes over his job. Her close friend is Cayden Sullivan.

Jay Rider: The son of Alex Rider, he has willingly allowed himself to be trained. He has a green belt in karate, and wants to be like his dad when he grows up. He is very protective of his older sister and he knows her friends very well.

Cayden Sullivan: Employed by the CIA, she was trained by Alex Rider and thinks almost exactly like him. Alex is very protective of her. When they met, Alex was angry that the CIA would employ a teenager, but she willingly works for them. Alex made sure that she could defend herself. Her temper is very famous within the CIA and will explode without warning. She is close friends with another of Alex's partners and Alex's daughter. She also have a reasonably good relationship with the SAS soldiers. She lives with 2 other agents that pretend to be her parents.

Arianne Rouverain: One of Alex's former partners, she was forced to go to a desk job by him because she was injured. Alex was the one who saved her life, so she feels like she should help save him and return the favor. She works for the CIA, but is occasionally loaned out to MI6 at the request of Mrs. Jones. She has a reputation of being "drop-dead" gorgeous. Literally. She is a formidable opponent and has a death glare that would make Batman cower in fear.

Tulip Jones: The director of MI6, she has occasionally asked to borrow agents from the CIA that Alex has trained. He still has a reputation of being the best agent.

Grace Hutchins: Trixie's sister, although they had a "little" falling out when Trixie agreed to marry Alex, drop out of college, and not tell their mother. Grace didnt know that Trixie was dead, on account of the two of them having no contact since that night.

I was also told that I have a hole-y plot! Trixie was killed in a drive-by, NOT A HOSTAGE SITUATION! Just wanted to clear that up. :)

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST wear a kilt

I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR CHRISTMAS, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth

I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.

I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s

I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problem

YOUR GUY SIDE:

You love hoodies
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
You love video games.
Guitar Hero/Rock Band rule!
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football/rugby games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball/rugby cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun,
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night

Total: 20

YOUR GIRL SIDE:

You wear lip gloss/stick.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheerleading a sport. (I did cheerlead)
You hate wearing the color black.
Video games are boring.
Rock Band/Guitar Hero are a waste of time.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the heck of it.
Like being the star of every thing

Total: 3

Favorite characters from random books, tv shows, movies, ect. in no particular order

1. Alex Rider

2. Boba Fett

3. Robin (Dick Grayson)

4. Green Lantern

5. Captain America

6. Nightwing (Dick Grayson)

7. Batman (Bruce Wayne)

8. Robin (Tim Drake)

9. Darth Vader

10. Sarah (from Chuck)

11. Neal Caffrey

12. Jack Starbright

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before?

No

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

Oh, yeah. Ryan Reynolds? Heck yeah (He's kinda hot in the comics too)

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

It would have to be the other way around, but that would a pretty beast child.

4. Do you recall any fics about Nine?

Yeah, but I don't know what it was called. There are a lot of them, though.

5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?

Heck NO! Yikes! (That would be a really scary child that they would have if they did, though)

6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten?

Definitely 5/10.

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve in an awkward situation?

YIKES! I would hate to have Batman walk in on any of my conversations. Although Robin is probably used to it, he would feel really really awkward after that. Batman is frickin' SCARY!!

8. Make up a summary of a Three/Ten fic.

Sarah and Robin. Spy and secret vigilante. With Batman looking over your shoulder, what could possibly go wrong (other than the obvious violence that will no doubt follow)

9. Is there such a thing as One/Eight fluff?

Ah, no.

10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

Well, it would be Jack dating Bruce Wayne and she finds out that he is Batman so she dumps him and he gets really mad at his villains because he really liked her so Robin has to stop him. Title: We're Done and You Can Deal With It

11. What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to go out with One?

YIKES!!!

12. Does anyone on your Friends List read Three slash?

Not that I know of.

13. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

I don't think so, but I could be wrong.

14. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?

Probably not.

15. What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?

CHUCK!!!

16. If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

Uh, Tim Drake? I really have no idea.

17. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

Slightly fluffy (Jack, Alex & Nightwing: very family-oriented)

18. What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two?

Well, you don't try to flirt with #2 in the first place, so nothing.

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING IS EXTREMELY RANDOM AND MAY NOT BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR MENTAL HEALTH.
Do you care? If not, well, you're full of awesomenss! :D

If you think about a virtual character all day long, or even dream of one, paste this on your profile.

If you are against bullying and cruelty, paste this on your profile.

If you invent your own curse words, copy and paste this onto your profile, you crapholes!

If you love chocolate, paste this on your profile.

If you're insane, paste this on your profile.

If you can't bear to see someone cry, paste this on your profile.

If you hate being called a loser, paste this on your profile.

If you're mischievous, and the joker of your family, paste this on your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you get really ticked off when there is FINALLY a new fanfic on your favorite fandom...and it's in a foreign language *rage face, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you'd never flame anybody ever because you know how you'd feel if you got that message, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you think that people who make "if you think that blankety blankety blank, copy and paste this into your profile"s are stupid, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away and remembered copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you read this and do not paste it into your profile, I will investigate you and find out who you are. Then I will tell the police about you because I will assume you are a zombie.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever clicked on something, read it, gone back, and then clicked on it again because you suffered short-term memory loss, copy and paste!

If you respond/talk to your characters, copy this to your- SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU! I'M NOT WRITING YOUR STORY RIGHT NOW!- profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.(3 books a year? Is that some kind of joke? Perhaps a typo; and they really mean "3 books a WEEK"? Or DAY?)

If you hate (or close to hate if you're a non-hater) those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was 'too small' and 'off its orbit' for a couple scientists' likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy this onto your profile. (LONG LIVE PLUTO!)

If you despise those people who think their very existence gives them the right to insult you, copy and paste this to show them that they don't!

If most of the guys in your class are morons, copy and paste this to show you want to cart them to a deserted island!

If your school should be a soap opera/comedy series/drama/sitcom, copy and paste and hope a TV station comes to film at your school!

If you love animals, copy and paste this to show you love fur, feathers, scales, and shells!

If you LOVE to read, and read often, copy and paste this!

If you facepalm a lot, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you're sick of people who take religion WAAY too seriously, copy and paste this!

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you actually take the time to read other people's profiles, put this in yours.

If you have laughed so hard that you couldn't breath and ended up laughing silently while half crying due to lack of air copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever done something painful and your first thought is "Must make a copy and paste on my fanfic profile about this", copy and paste this into your profile!

IF YOU LOVE CAPS LOCK, COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you just wasted time in your life you'll never get back by reading this profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile.

If you want to push a person of a cliff right now but that person happens to not exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever wanted an inanimate object to go die copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever yelled at an inanimate object copy and paste this into your profile.

If you can raed tihs, cpoy tihs itno yuor polrfie, and sea if ohtres can raed it.

If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get, like, two reviews, copy this into your profile.

Ninety-three percent of the teen population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe. Copy and paste this if you would be part of the seven percent that'd be LAUGHING YOUR BUTT OFF!

If you know someone that should be hit by a bus copy and paste this to your profile.

If said person who should be hit by a bus has ever called you sexy, copy and paste this.

If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile.

If you are crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

They say, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Well, I think the gun helps. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

Surprisingly, I agree with almost all of these (is that a good thing or a bad thing?)

54 Fun Things To Do At Wal-Mart (Phoenix Retribution, you are a very bad influence)

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially in thin narrow aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this crap, anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."

17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

33. Take bets on the battle described above.

34. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: "Marco Polo."

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.

45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

46. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.

47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

51. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good Bessie."

52. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.

53. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)."

54. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

I Have...

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people the blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand (a pencil right before class!)
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair (realized it at 3 in the morning, so being the natural smarty pants that I am, I cut it out. I now have a bald spot)
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble (I also swallowed gum jumping down the stairs...)
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside (with a dark blue bra!)
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. Walked into a pole
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on.
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it (in the middle of church)
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were (still haven't gotten used to the fact that I'm 15)
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one or because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side (I did this on a test; got a 70 on it. Teacher wondered what was wrong with me cuz I usually get a 100)
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out.
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't (people think you're strange when you're hyper at 5 in the morning)
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back.
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about (my friends and I named a guy "Homework")
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it. :)
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class

Annoying Things To Do In the Elevator:

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."

14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.

22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

23)WHEN the elevator door opens run outside and down the hall yelling, "OH NO I'M GONNA MISS THE ELEVATOR!!"

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (How do use regular soap?)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (Suggestion? Crazy Idea Time!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Aw! I wanted it to be cold!)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (Can I drive before I take it?)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (Thanks, that really narrowed it down)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Which is...)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (That would be why I bought it)

On a package of pasta after the cooking insturctions: "Put on fork and eat."

On a can of bug spray: “Harmful to bees”.

On a TV remote control: “Not dish washer safe”. (But its dirty!)

A New Zealand insect spray: "Not tested on animals."

A VCR box says: "Instructional video on hooking up your VCR included." (Um... How do i watch it?)

A can of self-defense pepper spray: "May irritate eyes."

A dishwasher carries this warning: "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher."

A popular manufactured fireplace log: "Caution - Risk of Fire." (Isn't that the point?)

A rubber ball toy: "Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." (Thank you, I'm not blind)

A baby stroller: "Remove child before folding." (Oh, so that's why it's not folding!)

A pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists: "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover."

A Fruit Roll-Up snack: "Remove plastic before eating." (But that adds the extra flavor)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! =D

put this on your page
if you love to laugh

How to Make People Annoyed At You:

Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

Drum on every available surface.

Sing the Batman theme constantly.

Staple papers in the middle of the page.

Ask 1-800 operators for their home phone number. If they don’t give it to you ask why they are calling YOU at home.

Sew department store anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

Set alarms for random times.

Honk and wave to strangers.

Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

Tape pieces of "Play School" over climactic parts of rental movies.

Borrow someone’s easer, then when they ask for it back, throw it across the room, making sure it misses them, and shout “You sure cant catch!!”

In the middle of a long car trip, yell out, really loudly, “I need to pee’. To be even more annoying, do it just after you’ve left, or taken a pee break.

When on a long road trip, say “are we there yet’ every five minutes

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that stuff up in two seconds. That's why when I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you."

Why America has some issues:

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway
and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'

10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering

Pick the month you were born:
January--I kicked
February--I loved
March--I kissed
April--I licked
May—I did the Macarena with
June--I smelled
July—I jumped on
August--I had lunch with
September--I danced with
October--I sang to
November--I yelled at
December--I ran over

Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1--a birdbath
2--a monster
3--a phone
4--a fork
5--a snowman
6--a gangster
7--my mobile phone
8--my dog
9--my best friends' boyfriend
10--my neighbor
11--my science teacher
12--a banana
13--a fireman
14--a stuffed animal
15--a goat
16--a pickle
17--your mom
18--a spoon
19-- - a smurf
20--a baseball bat
21--a ninja
22--Chuck Norris
23--a noodle
24--a squirrel
25--a football player
26--my sister
27--my brother
28--an ipod
29--a surfer
30--a llama
31--A homeless guy

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White--because I'm cool like that
Black--because that's how I roll.
Pink--because I'm crazy.
Red--because the voices told me to.
Blue--because I'm sexy and I do what I want
Green--because I think I need some serious help.
Purple--because I'm AWESOME!
Gray--because Big Bird said to and he's my leader
Yellow--because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange--because my family thinks I'm stupid anyway
Brown--because I can..

Other--because I'm a Ninja!
None--because I can't control myself!

Combine and see what you get!

I have: I ran over a monster because that's how I roll.

Stupidest Last Words In The History Of Mankind:

What does this button do?

It's probably just a rash.

Are you sure the power is off?

The odds of that happening have to be a million to one!

Which wire was I supposed to cut?

I wonder where the mother bear is.

I've seen this done on TV.

These are the good kind of mushrooms.

It's strong enough for both of us.

This doesn't taste right.

I can do that with my eyes closed.

I've done this before.

Well, we've made it this far.

That's odd.

I'll just put my head in it to make sure.

Don't be so superstitious.

Now watch this.

Look Ma! No Hands!

Don't worry, it's not contagious.

Of course it's safe.

It can't get any worse...

There's only one way to find out!

12 things you shouldn't say to a police officer

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas )
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8. I pay your salary!
9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other
cars around.. That's how far ahead of me they are.
12. When the Officer says "Gee Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT? Left knee: crashed on my roller blades.

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM? Posters Batman and Star Wars people (I have so many, my mom said I had to put up at least one real picture)

3. DO YOU SNORE, GRIND YOUR TEETH, OR TALK IN YOUR SLEEP? None, but I used to sleepwalk (my 12 year old brother still does...creeps my family out)

4. WHAT TYPE OF MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN To? Alternative, 80's

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN? 11 in the morning.

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW? Veggie burger from BJ's.

7. WHAT DO YOU MISS? Having a basement (even though that was ten years ago)

8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION(S)? My car

9. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5'5"

10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC? Nope!

11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK? No.

12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY? People can cry?

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PERFUME FOR A GIRL? Bath and Body Works Warm Vanilla Sugar

14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX? Black hair, blue eyes

15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF BEING PROPOSED TO? While watching a superhero/Star Wars movie, or an amusement park

16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK? Energy drink (I'm not allowed to drink coffee)

17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING? Mushrooms, tomatoes, spinach, and Alfredo sauce (from Papa Murphy's)

18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Cheeseburger without meat from Wendy's

20. HAVE YOU EVER EATEN A GOLDFISH? Like the little crackers? Yes. The actual fish? Uh, who wrote this test?

21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST MEANINGFUL GIFT YOU'VE EVER RECEIVED? A car.

22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY? Yeah...not telling you, though :)

23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED? I wish...

24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND? Delia's, band t-shirts (that's literally what I wear everyday that I don't have to wear my uniform to school: jeans and a t-shirt)

26. DO YOU HAVE A PET RIGHT NOW? Nope, but our hamster died last Monday

27. WHAT KIND IS IT? It was a hamster

28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING? What crazy person would do that?

29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU? Tell them to their face

30. TYPE A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED: 27

31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES? Either works for me (but my crush is a brunette)

32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN? My best buddy :)

33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST? Walking anywhere with no shoes (or at least no socks...I have to wear at least socks) and the radio (every station plays the same 5 songs)

34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE USA? Wales, England, Ireland, Germany, France, Switzerland, Austria, and I was this close to going to Scotland this summer. That's next summer, and then summer after is Italy, and after that it's Australia and New Zealand!

35. YOUR WEAKNESSES? Anything Star Wars or Batman (Anyone sensing a trend?)

36. MET ANYONE FAMOUS? Kenny Rogers (the Texas Rangers baseball player)

37. FIRST JOB? Uh, does babysitting count?

38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL? Nope, but I really want too.

39. DO YOU SWEAR? Nope. Never have, never will.

40. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE FILLING THIS OUT? Drawing a world map freehand

41. HAVE YOU EVER HAD SURGERY? No

42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST? My awesome piano playing, my amazing writing and math skills (strange combination)

43. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? Yep.

44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? An iPhone

45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT? 2 twin boys (and then adopt a few, maybe a couple foster care kids)

46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? My name is completely my own

47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? No

49. WHAT KIND OF SHAMPOO DO YOU USE? Paul Micheal

50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? It's decent

51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? I'm a Veggie people!!

52. ANY BAD HABITS? Not doing my Spanish homework, not doing my Biology homework

53 WHAT CD ARE YOU MOST EMBARRASSED TO HAVE ON YOUR SHELF? Lady Gaga

54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Heck yeah! I'm adorable (according to almost everyone I've met)

56. DO LOOKS MATTER? Not really.

57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? Temper tantrum!!

58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME? Grandparents' house in Hawaii, my best bud's house

60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? Hot Wheels monster trucks

61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE? 30-something

62. WERE YOU A FAN OF BARNEY AS A KID? I have never seen an episode of Barney in my LIFE!

63. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Are you kidding? I LIVE on sarcasm (my mom doesn't get it though; she tries to correct it)

64. MASHED POTATOES OR MACARONI AND CHEESE? Can I have both? Please? :)

65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL? Someone with good standards

66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? Zozerz, Zoebelle (hate that one) Adorable (not kidding)

67. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE BAND/SINGER? Panic! At the Disco, Paramore, Echo and the Bunnymen, Daft Punk, Sleigh Bells

68. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW/S? Sherlock (on BBC) NCIS, NCIS LA, Bones, White Collar, Young Justice

69. WHAT WAS YOUR ACT SAT SCORE? I haven't taken either yet.

70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Cookies and Cream, Banana Cream Pie

71. DO YOU HAVE ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES? Um, yeah?

72. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT? About an hour ago

73. DID YOU NOTICE THAT THERE WAS NO #64? There were a few other numbers missing, but that wasn't one of them

74. WHATS THE FASTEST YOU HAVE GONE IN A CAR? 120 mph (not kidding; the Autobahn in Germany is amazing)

75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS? I don't really expect it

76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO? Some song on the radio. I'm sorely lacking on my popular modern music

78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Uh...

79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE/SAME SEX? Hair

80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG? Ballad of Mona Lisa (Panic! At the Disco)

81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE? Confusing people (like, people that are confusing)

82. FAVORITE MONTH OF THE YEAR? Summer! As long as I'm not in Texas (preferably somewhere that still has snow)

83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN? That's a good question...I'll get back to you.

85. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? Brown (but this summer it'll be blue, no joke. My friend is gonna Kool-Aid dye it)

86. EYE COLOR? Blue (although some people think it changes color)

89. FAVORITE FOOD RESTAURANT? In-n-Out Burger!

90. YOU LIKE SUSHI? Can't stand it

91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED? Sherlock

92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? Christmas!!!! (I'm already counting down)

93. PLAY ANY MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS? Piano, and soon to be guitar

94. REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT? Republican all the way

95. KISSES OR HUGS? Hugs

96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? Relationships

97. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? A book (the new Ally Carter one: Out of Sight, Out of Time)

98. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU HAVE? Yellow Mini Cooper named Wally (he gets lots of love)

99. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? Just finished the aforementioned Ally Carter book. And then my friend stole it.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
BEST FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Dang … we sure messed up … but that was really fun!”

FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Keep your stuff for so long they forget it’s yours.

FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the crowds’ butt that left you.

FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FRIENDS: Are for a while.
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say “brink the rest of that, you know we don’t waste.”

FRIENDS: Will talk bad about the person who talks bad about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will knock them out!

FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
BEST FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
BEST FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep or kick them out.

FRIENDS: Will help me find my way when I'm lost.
BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions.

FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.

FIENDS: Will watch my pets when I go away.
BEST FRIENDS: Won't let me go away.

FRIENDS: Will help me up when I fall down.
BEST FRINEDS: Will point and laugh because they tripped me.

FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with me.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with me.

FRIENDS: Asks me for my number.
BEST FRIENDS: Asks me for her number.

FRIENDS: Hides me from the cops.
BEST FRIENDS: Is probably the reason they are after me in the first place.

FRIENDS: Won’t let me make an idiot of myself in public.
BEST FRIENDS: Is up there with me making an idiot out of themself too.

FRIENDS: Fade.
BEST FRIENDS: Are FOREVER...

Some pretty awesome quotes:

"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous- everyone hasn't met me yet."

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you."

"I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets."

"If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?"

"I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens."

"There is one thing my wife and I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn't stand for that."

"Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash."

"The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits."

"He's my brother." (Thor) "He killed 80 people in 2 days." (Black Widow) "He's adopted."

Grab the book nearest to you, and go to page 111, Paragraph 6.

Beethoven was a great pianist, one of the first composers to truly explore the instrument's capabilities.

Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can yo touch?

The arm of the couch.

What is the last thing you watched on TV?

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

Without looking, guess what time it is:

2:50 PM

Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?

2:49 PM

With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

My bro and his friend watching Sherlock Holmes 2.

When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Half an hour ago, coming back from Half-Price Books.

Before you started this survey, what did you look at?

batman-defeats-all's profile.

What are you wearing?

Captain America t-shirt, blue and orange Adidas, converse socks, jeans.

Did you dream last night?

Uh, for once in my life, no!

What are on the walls of the room you are in?

Strange Chinese paintings.

Seen anything weird lately?

Yeah. My brother.

What do you think of this quiz?

Something to pass the time with.

What is the last film you saw?

Again, Sherlock Holmes 2.

If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?

Books, comics, an awesome license plate that says Batman, and new clothes for my mom and brother (they really need to work on what they wear in public!)

Tell me something about you that I don't know:

I am really angry at Half-Price Books.

If you could change two things about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

Make people stop being so stupid, and make more people act like Sherlock Holmes.

Do you like to dance?

The foxtrot is quite enjoyable.

George Bush:

I have no opinions on anything whatsoever concerning him.

Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

Harper.

Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?

Drake.

1) Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, ETC on shuffle
2) For each question, press the next button to get your answer
3) YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN, NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4) Put any comments in parentheses after the song name
5) Put it in your profile!

1. What would you say about your boyfriend?
Obi-Wan to the Rescue- Kevin Kiner (Wow. What did my boyfriend do?)

2. What is the first thing you say in the morning?
Dancing With Myself- Billy Idol (My bad...)

3. Your teacher is...
The One I Love- REM (That's not creepy)

4. What's written on your classroom's blackboard?
The Kids Don't Stand A Chance- Vampire Weekend (Ominous much? I'm scared)

5. How would you describe your next door neighbours?
Dear Prudence- Siouxsie and the Banshees (That's probably what I would say if I actually knew my neighbors. Sadly, I'm anti-social)

6. What would your best friend say about you?
Hanging on the Telephone- Blondie (I hate the telephone...unless it's my cell phone)

7. How do you feel right now?
King of Swing- Big Bad Voodoo Daddy (Hmm...I can live with that)

8. What's on your bedside table right now?
Dark Shines- Muse (Again, ominous much?)

9. What did you do when you woke up this morning?

Islands- Young the Giant (What about them islands?)

10. When you open your wardrobe you see...
All We Ever Wanted Was Everything- Bauhaus (Huh?)

11. What did you say after you last attended a concert?
Biko- Simple Minds (Y'know, after the last one, that's about all I would say if I hadn't lost my voice with all the screaming I did. Oops.)

12. If you had to write a Twilight FanFiction right now, what would the title be?
Our House- Madness (I haven't even read Twilight, and I've only seen the first two movies. I don't really want to think about that.)

13. A song you would sing at your school's talent show would be...

Speed the Collapse- Metric (If only my school were big enough to actually have a talent show...)

14. Your life's theme song is...

Hong Kong Garden- Siouxsie and the Banshees (Uh, my life is anything BUT a garden)

15. How would you describe what you are doing this moment?
Bryn- Vampire Weekend (...)

16. If you had to go and jump off a building, what would your last words be?
The Storm- Big Country (Those bagpipes really got to me, I guess)

17. Your motto is...

Rescue Me- The Alarm (Yes, please do)

18. If you could buy anything in this world you'd buy...
Fight to the End- Kevin Kiner (Why am I fighting if I can buy anything?)

19. What did you dream about last night?

Talk Talk- Talk Talk (I dreamed of people talking?)

20. Any last words?

Wings of a Dove- Madness (I'm not actually as old as my music suggests...)