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![]() Author has written 2 stories for Naruto. If life gives you lemons... ... stick em in your bra. Why do we ((sleep)) in church, But stay ((awake)) through a 2 hour movie? Why is it so ((hard)) to talk about God, but so ((easy)) to Gossip? Why are we so ((bored)) when we look at a Christian magazine, but find it ((easy)) to read Playboy? Why is it so easy to ((ignore)) a Godly Facebook Wall Post, Yet we ((repost)) the nasty ones? Why are ((churches)) getting smaller, But ((bars and clubs)) are growing? Think about it, are you going to repost this? Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you'll get laughed at? Would You Have Read This if it Said... Read This In God's Name. 80 percent of you won't repost this. Jesus Christ said:"If you deny me in front of your friends I will deny you in front of my father." If you love God with your whole heart and are 100 percent proud of it, copy & paste this in your profile. 19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai ChOpstIcKsXOXO, RadicalEd57, Nigellica, Narutonarutolove 98 percent of the Teenage population drinks or has been around alchohol. 2.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the tv. 3.) You read this list, & keep nodding and smiling. "If the only way for me to be with you is in my dreams, then let me sleep forever." "I said your boyfriend was gay, and he hit me with his purse." "I swear I’d rip my heart out if you said you’d be impressed." (ADMIT IT, you know you would) you call me a bitch, bitch is another word for dog, a dog barks, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, nature, nature is beautiful, you just called me beautiful, thanks for the compliment. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends grab those knives and stab those asshole back for you. A good friend is someone who thinks you are a good egg even though he knows you're slightly cracked- Bernard Meltzer Friends are relatives you make for yourself- Gustache Deschamps You were born an original... don't die a copy. Your right to smoke stops when it interferes with my right to breathe. (damn right!) "The truth may hurt, but your lies will kill me." (Even if it’s a pain, the truth is better in the long run…besides, if you tell the truth you won’t have to remember your pathetic alibi –Me (NNL).) "Don’t tell me the sky is the limit, when there are footprints on the moon." (Bullshit) "It was the perfect crime, I stole his heart, and he stole mine." "Don’t make someone your everything, because when they leave, you have nothing. (True, but we do it anyway) "Stealing one idea is plagiarism. Stealing many is research." (HELL YA!) "If you can’t beat them, join them. If you can’t join them, bribe them. If you can’t bribe them, blackmail them." "I don’t suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it." "Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly" (hehe) "My goal in life is to hurt you, severely." (violent much? Who else had a ‘Sasuke’ moment when they read that?) "That which doesn't kill you...will most likely succeed the second time." "I'm not tense. I'm just terribly, terribly alert." "If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk!" (Inner me) "My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems." (Don’t we all?) "Curiosity killed whoever got in my way." "I know the voices aren’t real, but they have some pretty good ideas." "I'm a bomb technician. If you see me running, try to keep up." “If you’re gonna die, then die, but do it right.” "Take a picture, it lasts longer." (if you dunk it in water its not) "Stupid people do stupid things, smart people out-smart each other." (No they don’t.) "Have I told you lately that I hate every single last one of you?" (Kage Bushin no Jutsu!) "Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend forever." You've never been a person to lean on, but rather a person who has made leaning unnecessary." "Knock, maybe I'll answer the door, when I decide that I'm home..." (I DO THIS ALL THE TIME!) Opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss. One should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them. If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots? (YES! WHY DO THEY?) As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools. Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems? I can only please on person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit. (BOOYAH!) How is it possible to have a civil war? friends will help you find your way when you're lost, best friends will be the one messing with your compass, stealing your map and giving you bad directions (no they don’t, those aren’t best friends, I believe their called….what was it? Oh yes, bastards.) Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES! (WHOO!!) Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot. NNLNNLNNLNNLNNLNNL STRESS: A condition brought on by over-riding the bodies desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk that desperately deserves it. STRESSED is DESSERTS spelled backwards. Before you criticize someone you should walk a mile in their shoes, that way when you criticize them you'll be a mile away and you'll have their shoes. (Who else finds this stupid?) Nothing would ever get done if it weren't for the last minute. Don't take life too seriously-it's not like you're getting out alive I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect. You can't change who you are or the past, so suck it up and deal with it. "I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth..." (I mute my mom a lot in my head) "Support your local undertaker and DROP DEAD!" "If you're willing to jump... I'm willing to watch you hit the ground..." (Ouch, that’s mean) “Time flies when you are with the one you love. And minutes are eternity when you are not.” (That’s because you’re dumb and desperate) “The hardest thing in life is loving the person right next to you and knowing they love someone else.” (Severus Snape, anyone?) Live like you ain’t afraid to die. Don’t be scared just enjoy your ride. (if this were true the human population would probably be extinct from killing each other. No fear, right? That means no fear for jail, no fear for consequences…not afraid to do the time if you did the crime….) Silence. Sometimes, the nicest sound in the world. Other times, the sound that you dread the most. (Very true) "The only promise anyone should ever worry about is that they will wake up and breathe tomorrow; and even that isn't guaranteed." (couldn’t have said it better myself) "You don’t give up on the people you love, its not right, it’s like telling your heart not to beat, and telling your soul not to feel, it’s just not possible." "The best advice I can give you is to ignore advice. Life is too short to be distracted by the opinions of others." (depends the situation and how much brain you have) "I'm the kind of person who laughs at a joke 3 times "It's not when animals attack (its) when people do stupid things to get themselves bitten." (That Australian guy, eh?) "Whatever our struggles and triumphs, however we may suffer, all too soon they bleed into a wash just like the watery ink on paper." "I believe in respect for the dead; in fact, I could only respect you if you WERE dead." (whoever wrote "No I don't have a girlfriend, but I do know a girl who would be pissed if she heard me say that." (I thought of Naruto when I read that) "Therapy is expensive, but bubble wrap is free." (YAY!) "The horns are there to hold up my halo." (I use this to describe myself) Woman: HURRYY UP! Man: patience is a virtue Woman: I DON'T THINK THE WALL THAT’S CRUSHING US KNOWS THAT! "Logic is panics prey." "you laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same." (BE PROUD IF YOU DON’T FIT WITH THE STATUS QUO!) "If you can keep your head when all those about you are loosing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation." "Heero, there is a very big, very red and very much on-fire bird staring at me." - Duo, Parallel "If all else fails, hit it with a big hammer." (GO LINK! KICK THAT DRAGONS ASS!) "If tomorrow was today, then everyone would be happy. Alas, it will never happen, for tomorrow will never come." "Nothing is as easy as the expert makes it seem." "Haste makes waste." (That’s why the people in the cars in horror movies always drop their keys) "are you kidding this is a contest of freaks. what do you want me to do, fire my slingshot at him?" "I'd look on the bright side if I could find it." "There are only stupid people around me, but they mean well." (I think those might be pre-psycho Sasuke thoughts on Sakura and Naruto) "Okay, you be the optimist, and I'll go on being the pessimist and we'll be fine. Just don't go pushing your 'happiness' on me." "God made man, knew he could do better, and made woman." (Oh yeah!) "Envy is ignorance; imitation is suicide." "Just because you're smiling, doesn't mean you're happy." (Fits me perfectly) Female Pick Up Lines, if you have one, add it! Man: Where have you been all my life? Man: Have I seen you someplace before. Man: Is this seat empty? Man: Your place or mine? Man: So what do you do for a living? Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Man: So how do you like your eggs in the morning? Man: Your body's like a temple. Man: I would go to the ends of the earth for you. Man: If I saw you naked, I'd die happy. Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and I together Man: I'd do anything for you. Man: You eyes are the most beautiful shade of... (insert color here) Man: You truly are something. Man: Come on, what do you see when you look at me? If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile. The Jashin Alphabet A Is For Akamaru Who Drowned In A Pool I Is For Ino Who Lost Her Front Brakes Q Is For Quentin Who Took The Wrong Trail x Akatsukicons! Itachi -/ \- Deidara o\/ Zetsu \o.o/ Tobi @ Sasori -.- Kisame =o_o= Hidan o.o Kakuzu . Konan @o.o Pein o:o Copy and paste this to your profile to help them take over the world!! If you think that those stupid kids should just give that fricking-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix already and be DONE with it, copy this into your profile. If you've ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile. .••) .•) .•.•) .•) 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, 7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less 16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing 19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll And my favorite: 25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you". CONTINUATION OF PROFILE SUMMARY PROFILE SHOULD BE VIEWED BY ONLY THOSE AT LEAST 16 AND UP) And now an ode to yaoi: If yaoi were vodka And I were a duck I'd swim to the bottom And drink my way up But Yaoi ain't vodka And I ain't a duck So give me some yaoi And shut the fuck up It takes 82 muscles to frown, and only 8 to reach out and slap the shit out of somebody. (yeah, and it only takes a phone call away to throw your ass in jail, too) 10 Things In Golf That Sound Dirty (I'm sorry! But I HAD to post this! =D) 1. Look at the size of his putter. I am a peaceful person that is filled with violent rage. (something my brother might say about me) Be nice to your kids... they pick your nursing home. (Everybody loves Raymond, anyone?) I'd make you swear on the bible if it didn't make your skin sizzle. (OUCH!) They say that 99 of ugly-ass people check their messages with their thumb. It's too late- don't switch fingers now! It takes 82 muscles to frown, and only 4 to stick up you middle finger to tell somebody to fuck off. (and it only takes a quick moment to break the finger and punch the mouth that insulted you) After great sex, she laid there stroking his penis. He said: do you want some more? She said: No, I'm just admiring it... I use to have one... Cinderella was fired from Disney today. She was found bouncing on Pinnochio's face, screaming, "Lie, you little fucker, lie!" Mickey and Minnie went to court where Donald was the judge. Donald asked Mickey, "Why are you here today?" Mickey replies, "She's cheating on me." Donald says, "Well, why do you think so?" Mickey looks at Minnie who's giggling (hehehe) and says, "Look at her! She's fucking Goofy!" Guy: What did you say? Girl: Well, what did you think you heard? Guy: I'd rather not repeat it... Girl : Well then, we'll never learn what it was will we? Next section is all quotes from the profile of Sandgirl395...enjoy! "Having the love of your life break up with you and say, "We can still be friends," is like having your dog die, and your mom saying that we could still keep it." "Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back... are we talking about zombies here?" In a dog-eat-dog world the best thing to do is become a cat. (politics The early bird catches the worm, on the other hand, the early worm gets eaten.(hmmmm…..) I love you is eight letters. So is bullshit. As I said before, I never repeat myself. (…………………) Now I have a very serious question I would like someone to answer about the Naruto episodes. ANBU...WTF man? They are supposed to be the Elite of the elite...so how come they are always getting slaughtered? Shouldn't they at least put up a decent fight? If anyone agrees copy and paste this into your profile. lol "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear" ...1 John 4:18... . God Bless You All. IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school Now you have two choices 1) repost and show you care 2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart To Every Girl: To every girl that is SCARED to put her heart out there again, because she has been HURT too many times or so badly. To every girl that has been cheated on, because she's not a slut who gives it up to any guy. To every girl that dresses cute, not skanky. To every girl who wants to be called beautiful, not hot. To every girl that will spend her whole day looking for the perfect present for you. To every girl who gets her heart broken, because he chose that bitch instead. To every girl that would die to have a decent boyfriend. To every girl who would just once like to be treated like a princess. To every girl that cries at night because of another heartbreak. To every girl that won't get down on her knees open her mouth just to get a boyfriend. To every girl that just wants to hold hands. To every girl that kisses him with meaning. To every girl who just wishes he cared more. To every girl who would just once want a guy to give their jacket up when they are cold. To every girl who just wants him to call. To every girl who lies awake at night thinking about him. To every girl that just wants to cuddle. To every girl that just wants to sleep with him without having sex. To every girl who shows how much she cares and gets nothing back. To every girl that thought "maybe this one could be the one." To every girl that laughs at stupid stuff when she actually doesn't think it is funny. To every girl who is just looking for that one and only. and is having a rough time along the way. To every girl that doesn't want a guy who just plays with her emotions but actually cares about how she feels. To every girl who wants words backed up with actions. To every girl who doesn't just want to be another pretty face. To every girl that fell for all the lies only to find themselves alone in the end. To every girl that gave her heart away to have it shoved back in her face. To every girl that has faith that "tomorrow will be a better day." And it will be. To every girl that has gone through all of the above, thinking she would never have her happily ever after, you will find it. I know she did. (WavesWindWhirlpool) If you are a nice girl put this on you profile under the title : "To every girl." If you are a guy that thinks every girl should try to think about even a few of these things repost it as "I am looking for this girl" or if u have this girl put this on you profile under the title " I have this girl" And if you can, add another line! No Boy - No Love No Love - No Sex No Sex - No Children No Children - No School No School - No Teachers No Teachers - No Problem No Problem - OH YES!! IMPORTANT!! We all know or knew someone like this!! One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books.I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. 'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.' There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. (Amen to that) the word harrase sp? break it up and it says her ass! just thought it was ironic and wanted to add it!! |