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![]() Author has written 25 stories for Van Helsing, Fire Emblem, Naruto, Lord of the Rings, Underworld, Bones, Harry Potter, Sweeney Todd, Merlin, Death Note, Once Upon a Time, and A song of Ice and Fire. "Hiding the truth from them helps no one. Suckle them on dreams and falsehood to the exclusion of reality and they'll be unprepared for life." "The Good Sect is white and the Evil Sect is black. You're clean and I'm dirty... Hah! Do you really see the world in only those two colors?" "People consider fear to be a weakness... But harnessing that fear can one day make you a mighty warrior!" "It's a cruel, cruel, cruel world out there. Get used to it!" "I see the world how it is...in shades of gray. Nothing is totally clean or dirty! Those who squabble over Good and Evil Sects merely do for their own self-interests!" "Conan! What is good?" "To see the enemy flee before you, the burning of the villages, and the lamentations of the women." "Life is cruel. Why should the afterlife be any different?" "The unexamined life is not worth living." "As I climb onto your back I will promise not sting." "Rommel! You magnificent son of a bitch! I read your book!" "When the rapture comes can I use your car?" "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." "Welcome to the real world. It sucks. You're gonna love it." "A person with a black belt does not compare to a bartender with scar tissue on his knuckles." "Sleep tight ya morons!" "At last, my arm is complete again!" "We are all damned by our deeds, whether they are thought out or not." "In chaos there lies opportunity." "I became insane with the horrible intervals of sanity." "I love the smell of napalm in the morning. ...Smelled like...victory." "Do I contradict myself? Very well, I contradict myself. (I am large, I contain multitudes)." "Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!" "Listen up you primitive screwheads! This is my boom stick!" "I use to think we have to kill to survive. Now I see that we also have to kill in order to good." "So many vows...they make you swear and swear. Defend the king. Obey the king. Keep his secrets. Do his bidding. Your life for his. But obey your father. Love your sister. Protect the innocent. Defend the weak. Respect the gods. Obey the laws. It's too much. No matter what you do, you're forsaking one vow or the other." "We are all capable of great light or great darkness, no matter if you possess the face of an angel or the mask of a demon. There are circumstances beyond our control that can draw out an evil within ourselves; one that we never knew existed. But in the end, there is always hope for redemption." "Men are such thundering great fools. Even the sort who come along once in thousand years." The difference between kinky and perversion is one involves a feather and the other has a chicken. "A true man never dies ...even when he's killed." "Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!" News From the SpeedDemon 02/28/13 Ja, I am becoming really bad in updating. However, a good portion of my time in the summer was working on a novel for Camp NaNoWriMo, flying out to visit and hang out with Celtic Aurora and packing for Germany. Then from September to December I was studying abroad in Germany, which absorbed much of my writing time because I was having so much fun enjoying my time there. Then Christmas came when I returned home, and school started up again...yeah, you get the picture. Also, I won an XBox 360--with a Kinect. But nothing big will change since I need games and besides, my roommate and friend Dlvvanzor has a XBox 360 so nothing will really change...for now. But anyho, I have more ideas for stories so hopefully, I will save for time for writing so I can get farther in Ace in the Hole and reach a point that I can post my 100 theme fics. I also might release a Skyrim parody fanfic earlier than planned because it's freakin' hilarious and it's partially based on my commentary when I was first playing the game. We shall see. I also will update my poll because new stories are coming that I would like to start writing. But no matter what, the Lord of the Rings fic and the Patriot fic will come along--eventually. When I'm about halfway or so in Ace in the Hole, I will start posting chapters. So stay tune for more updates (hopefully). Cross your fingers, though. 01/22/12 Wow...I haven't updated this in a loooong time. Okay, I'm still working on Ace in the Hole, despite the lack of reviews or responses. Writing has just been a little slow at the moment due to college, rping, and new addictions to video games on my PCs. But I am going to try to write more and update faster, just stick with me readers and reviewers. And thanks to the arrival of the new show "Once Upon a Time", I know what to create some Rumpelstiltskin/Mr. GoldXEmma fics now. So, I believe this is my brain telling me to write more and play games less so I can finish AitH faster and start working on other fanfics ASAP. Let's see if I heed its nudging. 07/18/11 Chapter 8 of Ace in the Hole is up! I hope I get more feedback compared to my last update. But anyway, I hope to make plenty of progress with AitH by the time the school years rolls in again. My goal is update at least once a week--that's a maybe. Don't hold me to that vow completely. As for any other future works, I will be finishing off my friend lockheedelektra's story, Triple Entente with another pal, Fireball Jack. We'll get to it, eventually. Furthermore, I plan to release Love is War and my yet-to-be-named Lord of the Rings 100 theme fanfic when I'm either halfway done with AitH or almost done with it, depending on how I feel and how fast I am updating. I might had more story ideas to the list because the "A Song of Ice and Fire" series has given me more ideas for fanfics! 04/10/11 Well, at least I finished A Game of Thrones. The next chapter for Ace in the Hole is coming, it will just take time. I'm hoping to make this chapter very long to make up for the bloody, year-long wait. And TK Grimm's oneshot prize is on the way--that too will be long hence the fanfic will take some time as well. Oblivion, college, homework, friends, reading, Poke'mon, Skype, research, original writing and stories, and other entities have stalled my updates. I'll try not be so tempted and be firmer with my writing updates. Especially when I have the free time. I'm thinking, once I have the next chapter of Ace in the Hole and TK's prize up, I might start working on my couple of 100 theme challenge fics. 12/25/10 All right, everyone, hold onto your horses, the updates are coming! Right now, I'll be working on TK Grimm's oneshot prize and the next chapter to Ace in the Hole. For everyone who is still reading that fanfic, thanks for sticking with me, I will do my best to write the next chapter ASAP. College and other oneshot projects have kept me busy and away from the story. I miss writing it so I plan to write some more this week. That is, if I don't get sucked into the episodes of Stargate SG-1. 06/16/10 Nothing really new to report. Wild Justice is only four chapters away from being done while Experimental Value just has one more to go! My plan is get finish Wild Justice before I resume updating Ace in the Hole. After when it's just that fanfic, I'll probably bring out my two ficlets that contain some 100 Themes Challenges. My next Naruto and Van Helsing stories will also be up soon--you can understand now how quickly I want to finish up Wild Justice. 02/06/10 Whoo-hoo! Experimental Value is up! I pretty much have all five chapters typed up so I should be posting each chapter up periodically or whenever I feel like it. It's about time I finished that fanfic... Don't worry fans of Ace in the Hole and Wild Justice, I am still continuing to update those two stories. Ace in the Hole still has ways to go but after some planning of the future chapters of Wild Justice, I think the story will end with 25 chapters, including an epilogue. So that means I only have five more chapters until I'm done with my very first Sacred Stones fic! Now, let's see how long it takes me to finish it... Okay, as for any other new story updates...not really. Once I finish with Wild Justice then I'll start whatever I have next and maybe add a few more along the way. There are so many fanfics I want to write but since I don't have a time machine, it would be unwise to do them all at once. One step at a time. So...keep your eyes peeled for any impending updates! 10/12/09 Whew! Finally, I finished up Bringing Back What's Dead! It's been, what, like 2 years since I was writing that fanfic? Now that's done, I can go back to Ace in the Hole and Wild Justice. Hopefully, none of my readers and reviewers have given up on me... Anyway, I have plans to produce a Lords of the Avalon story and Experimental Value while I finish up my other two fanfics. I'm hoping to eventually get to work on the seconds chapter of the Wuthering Heights story lockheedelektra and I are writing. The same goes for the Charmed/Angel Xover fanfic, I'm all hyped to start on that once Celtic Aurora and I aren't so busy with school work and our other ficlets. So yeah, I have a lot planned that I want to write. That includes a Van Helsing story that I know I will have a ball writing. So stay tunned! 08/11/09 Not much happening save for I'm getting close to wrapping up Bringing Back What's Dead--it has two chapters to go, I think. Depending how much action I pack in chapter 11, the story might end with twelve chapters or maybe thirteen. I'm hoping twelve but sometimes, things just don't go as planned. Now, once Bringing Back What's Dead is complete, I can go back to my other two stories while in between working on my short Kabuto/Sakura fanfic (it's really short, only about 5 chapters long. You'll see why when it comes out). But I'm getting the urge to write more Van Helsing stories so Blood By Three won't be the only Van Helsing fanfic to come out, I'll probably slip in another one somewhere when I'm cranking out a lot of Valter/Selena fics. And also, I'm planning a Lords of Avalon story and two Head in the Clouds ficlets as well, it's time to get those fledling categories some stories! In fact, I have so many stories I would like to do that it makes me wish I had a time machine... Oh well, I just got to update quicker and write a hell lot more. 06/14/09 Holy cow, I'm actually doing one these log accounting reports? Gasp! All joking aside, let's get down to business. My Naruto fanfic, Bringing Back What's Dead, is progressing nicely hence I'll be focusing more on that than my other two stories simply because the end is drawing near for Bringing Back What's Dead. I should say the story shouldn't go past fifteen chapters, but I'm thinking the story has three or so chapters left before it's over. Moving right along. Well, as Celtic Aurora stated in her profile, I'm quite thrilled of our collaboration. Her Underworld story, Dark Ripples in Blood is officially a companion fic/prequel to my Underworld story, Ace In the Hole. Also, we've have decided to write an Angel/Charmed Xover fanfic with a little bit of the movie Heat sprinkled in it. A title hasn't been formed yet but I think we'll find one after a little more plotting and writing. Lastly, I am contemplating in having a Naruto pairings contest, I just have to find the document that listed all the rules, the pairings, and whatnot. I'll announce it in the next chapter of Bringing Back What's Dead. A multitude of people here seem to explain the story of how they got their pen name so I suppose I can do the same. Let's see...back in the year 10, 500 BC... Ha ha ha, only jesting. To be candid, 'SpeedDemon' came from a Spiderman comic I read years ago and it had a minor villain in it called SpeedDemon. His power (yes, you guessed it) was he could run inhumanly fast. The '315' stands for the infamous date March 15, which is also known as the Ides of March (that the day Julius Caesar was assassinated). Morbidly enough, it is one of my favorite dates (long story why but it all started with the Julius Caesar play I performed in. I was Mark Antony). The only things you need to know about me are that: 1: I'm a Death Eater 2: Tom Riddle should return, 3: As my friend, DraculasLover, says it, "I'm a Harry Potter traitor." Heh, heh, heh, heh...4: I enjoy being a hermit, 5: I am absolutely nuts over the movie "300" (the previous icons were pretty self-explanatory), 6: I'm in league with the dark side, the villains just seem to attract me more these days (though there are some exceptions, like LOTR series), 7: I'm officially a Naruto fanatic (Tobi was saying this on my last avatar: "LOL, world domination!" I was cackling so hard when I encountered this), 8: I am a major tomboy, 9: I'm renowned for being violent (especially in the art of fencing, writing, hand-to-hand combat, etc and life in general.), insane (I make other crazy people back away from me when I erupt into some maniacal frenzy and whatnot), aggressive, and sarcastic, 10: I'm not one to suffer fools (meaning if I believe you are acting like a frivolous, moronic, etc buffoon, I will point your idiocy out to you), and 11: I have suddenly developed a taste, or rather obsession, for the comic and book series, Lords of Avalon. Now that you all have a little taste of my personality I hope I didn't scare you away; I seem to have that intimidating affect on people...bah oh well. Deviant Art account: AThousandSnakebites (in honor of my first favorite Naruto character, Orochimaru) LJ account: yokai_drache Youtube account: CaptainBlood300 Shared account with Celtic Aurora: Tuomas Is Our Sin (This where we share our story of my character Egil and her character Catherine.) Shared account with lockheedelektra: The Valkyrie and the Druid (We have created a Wuthering Heights story that contains an alternative pairing by the likes you have never seen!) And for all those Van Helsing lovers out there, I have a short little story for you! Once upon a time, during the Crusades, there were two men. One was Gabriel Van Helsing, the other Count Vladislaus Dragulia. They were comrades-in-arms, almost like brothers but not—let me repeat—not gay lovers who were hot for each other. Eventually Van Helsing was order by God to kill Dracula for reasons unknown and Dracula made a pact with the Devil to gain a second life and to preserve his immortality he had to drink the blood of others. Countless centuries later, these two boys meet again and they still are straight. Dracula has three brides dressed in skimpy little outfits while Van Helsing has his eyes set on the feisty gypsy princess, Anna Valerious. Neither the vampire king nor the infamous monster hunter is covertly lusting after each other, dreaming of each other, and they certainly don’t want to rape or have sex with each other. That also applies to Carl, who is clearly a heterosexual friar who doesn’t want to die a virgin, hence he asks a female prostitute to give him some loving. Which she does and he is quite content. Oh, and Velkan isn’t gay either—Dracula didn’t come along and rape him in the dark and Velkan found out later that he enjoyed it. In short, Dracula loves his brides, Van Helsing loves Anna, and both Carl and Velkan love women. End of story. ATTENTION PLEASE!! Correct me if I'm wrong, but some people might be confusing two of my characters, Edward Orenstein/Van Helsing and Jacob Tornincasa with Edward Cullen and Jacob Black. If their last names or models don't convince you, let me begin my story. In the stories they have been in (Edward: Intrusive Dusk, Dark Ripples in Blood, and Ace in the Hole; Jacob: Intrusive Dusk and Ace in the Hole) they have been described with detail and percision. If you somehow skimmed over their apperance and missed envisioning what they looked like, well...I'll refrain from commenting on that one. And let's not miss that it has been stated that Edward is a hybrid: part demon, part vampire (unless Meyers has something she isn't telling you Twilighters about Edward besides the fact he's emo, sparkles like Tinkerbell, and likes to frolic in meadows.) and Jacob is no werewolf: he's a sadistic demon who loves to torture and play with people. I may never read the whole series but doesn't fit Jacob Black's profile. At all. Now, for the record, if you ask Edward Orenstein/Van Helsing to sparkle, he'll give you a "WTF?" look before scowling and reverting into his demonic form to scare the crap out of you (he might even make you his next meal). My Edward doesn't twinkle like a star. And if you ask Jacob Tornincasa to either explode into a wolf...or whatever, he just might lash one of his spiked, poison covered whips at you before he and Blanca decide to torture you. I don't know how people could mix these two minions of my character Thanatos up but apparently, I must address the matter before some people start to think Sir Sparkles-A-Lot and Jackie Blackie are working for Thanatos Wakahisa. Let me assure that will never happen--Thanatos would kill them on the spot if he felt they were worth killing. If you like to read more, Celtic Aurora makes some more excellent points on her profile here: http://www.fanfiction.ws/u/1394122/Celtic_Aurora Here is a video for all you Voldemort-lovers out there or HP fans looking for some comical entertainment of some form (if you're a fan of Potter Puppet Pals production you definitely want to watch this!): Potter Puppet Pals- The Mysterious Ticking Noise: http://www.youtubeve, Tobie, stub, youthes, Yettie, route, youth, outre, you'd, Tiber, Tobey, Tybie, fortune, torture, you're, future, jujube, outage, suture, touter, youths, yurt, touted, tubed, tubes, turbo, your, Rube, TB, Tb, outbid, outer, rube, tote, tout, touting, tune, tutu, yore" / .com/watch?v=Tx1XIm6q4r4&mode=related&search= You want to witness something that will either a) tramautize you, b) cause your eyebrows to raise in the speed of light, c) humor you, or d) send you into a fit of laughter at the idiocy of this music video. Introducing a video that was titled "The Worst Music Video": To To Coelo - I Eat Cannibals: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fde5PWRI6qE (Great song, horrendous music video) Ah, remember all those superbowl ads? Here's a "thriller": http:///index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=27486214 "I came, I saw, I conquered."-Julius Caesar "I'm you're Huckleberry."-Doc Holliday, Tombstone "Why Johnny Ringo, you look like someone just walked over your grave."-Doc Holliday, Tombstone "Why can't you people just stay on the ground?"-Armus, The Mummy Returns "You can't kill me Victor... I'm already dead."-Dracula, Van Helsing "Do me a favor. I know it's very difficult for you, but please stay right here and try not to do anything stupid." -Captain Jack Sparrow, POTC "Everything in this room is eatable. Even I'm eatable, but that is called cannibalism, my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies."-Willy Wonka, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. "You will curse the day you did not do...all that the Phantom asked of you!"-Erik/The Phantom, POTO "Your incompetence is becoming most taxing."-Viktor, Underworld "Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid."-Captain Jack Sparrow, POTC "Humans...they're so very fragile." -Ephidel, Fire Emblem "To be or not be, that is the question!" -Hamlet, Hamlet "I am no man! (yells)" -Eowyn, Return of the King "Shall I describe it to you? Or would you like me to find you a box?" -Legolas, Two Towers "Speak softly and carry a big stick." -Teddy Roosevelt "Why does it smell like wet dog in here?" -Carl, Van Helsing "Pathetic imbecile..." -Ephidel, Fire Emblem "Parseltongue won't save you now, Potter! It only obeys me!" -Tom Riddle, Chamber of Secrets "I killed Harry Potter!"-Neville, Goblet of Fire "I love those moments! I like to wave at them as they pass by."-Captain Jack, Dead Man's Chest "Hell hath no fury like a women scorned." President, X-Men 3 "I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt! And guess what's inside it!"-Captain Jack, Dead Man's Chest "Look, an undead monkey!"-Captain Jack, Dean Man's Chest "Did you see those Huns? They popped out the snow, like daisies!"-Mushu, Mulan "Stop me? He invited me. By building his wall he challenged my strength...Well, I'm here to play his game. Go! Tell your emperor to send his strongest armies! I'm ready." -Shan-Yu, Mulan "How many men does it take to deliver a message?" "One."-Shan-Yu and Archer Hun, Mulan "The flowers that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all. You don't meet a girl like that every dynasty."-The Emperor, Mulan "There comes a time when decent men simply roll up their sleeves, raise the black flag, and start slitting throats."-H.L. Mencken "Besides, the little girl will be missing her doll. We should return it to her."-Shan-Yu, Mulan "The taste for gambling, like that for sports, is a kind of feeble-mindedness--maybe even an insanity. It can be justified only by a resort to the most preposterous sophistry. Whenever it has seized a man of any visible talent--for example, Dostoevsky and C. C. Colton--he has ended crazy. It is the silliest of all the vices."-H.L.Menken "The fact that I have no remedy for all the sorrows of the world is no reason for my accepting yours. It simply supports the strong probability that yours is a fake."-H.L. Menken "SPARTANS! Tonight we dine in Hell!"-King Leonidas, 300 "A 1,000 nations of the Persian empire descends upon you! Our arrows will blot out the sun!" "Then we will fight in the shade."-A Persian messenger and Spartan warrior, 300 "Madness...? THIS IS SPARTA!"-King Leonidas, 300 "A new age has began. An age of freedom! And all who know that 300 Spartans gave their last breath to defend it. We will stand and fight...and die!"-King Leonidas, 300 "SPARTANS! This is where we fight! This is where they die!"-King Leonidas, 300 "Before this battle is over the world will know that few stood against many."-King Leonidas, 300 "Got it memorized?"-Axel, Kingdom of Hearts 2 "Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!"-Inigo, The Princess Bride "You're pissing me off."-Ghost Rider/Johnny Blaze, Ghost Rider "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I have sinned a lot."-Blackheart, Ghost Rider "There's an old saying 'never bring up more devils you can lay down?' My father laid down one too many."-Blackheart, Ghost Rider "I knew you were here. I can smell your fear."-Blackheart, Ghost Rider "The story goes he'll be normal during the day, but at night, in the presence of evil, the Rider takes over."-Caretaker, Ghost Rider "I'm the only one who can walk in both worlds. I'm Ghost Rider."-Johnny Blaze, Ghost Rider "You are alright?" "Yeah, I'm good. I feel like my skull is on fire, but I'm good.".- Caretaker and Johnny Blaze, Ghost Rider "Your Pensive Stare doesn't work on me. I have no soul to burn. Surprise, surprise! Guess the Caretaker forgot to mention that."-Blackheart, Ghost Rider "He sent you to take me back. I don't want to go back. I like it here!"-Blackheart, Ghost Rider "Hey, you're having an affair and I'm chopping the garlic. It's a wacky world!"-Joey, Friends "Hold thy desperate hand! Art thou a man? Thy form cries out thou art! Thy tears are womanish!"-Friar Lawrence, Romeo and Juliet "If love be rough with you then you be rough with love."-Mercutio, Romeo and Juliet "Beware the Ides of March."-Soothsayer, Julius Caesar "Only Spartan women can produce real men."-Queen Gorgo, 300 "Molon lave!" (Come and get them!)-the 300 Spartans "On my wedding night, my mother said to me: 'We Greek women may be lambs in the kitchen, but we're tigers in the bedroom.'"-Marie, My Big Fat Greek Wedding "The man is the head but the women is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants."-Marie, My Big Fat Greek Wedding "How about that. My name is Sawyer too."-Sawyer (or James), LOST "I am Valter, the Moonstone, Grado's finest general. And you're just a corpse who does not know he is dead."-Valter, FE: The Sacred Stones "Such terrible wounds and still he holds to his duty? How entertaining. Fly away, little man. Fly away. Try to outrun death. More time to savor the hunt...and the kill."-Valter, FE: The Sacred Stones "So we meet again. You know me as General Valter, but you will call me the Moonstone. I'll save you worthless dogs from your own incompetence. You'll thank me later."-Valter, FE: The Sacred Stones "Alright, ten bucks! Fork it over. Cough it up. Pay the Piper! Gimme it."-Chandler, Friends "Because it's Richard's son! It's like inviting a Greek tragedy over for dinner."-Rachel, Friends "Hey, you know, Mon, if things work out between you and Richard's son you'll be able to tell your kids that you slept with their grandfather."-Ross, Friends "Fine, judge all you want to. But married a lesbian (points to Ross), left a guy at the alter (points to Rachel), fell in love with a gay ice dancer (points to Pheobe), threw a girl's fake leg in the fire (points to Joey), live in a box (points to Chandler)!"-Monica, Friends "You're a stepping stone, and I'm moving up. Don't take it personally."-Caellach, FE: The Sacred Stones "There's a black boy dead for no reason, and the man responsible for it's dead. Let the dead bury the dead, Mr. Finch. Let the dead bury the dead."-Heck Tate, To Kill A Mockingbird "In the name of God, do your duty."-Atticus Finch, To Kill A Mockingbird "It's (courage) when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what."-Atticus Finch, To Kill A Mockingbird "I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated than: to get you into bed."-Ross, Friends "Ew, Lamb Chop. How old is that sock? If I had a sock on my hand for 30 years it be talking too."-Chandler, Friends "So you mean we are going to calm down the most self-absorbed women in the world by sitting around and doing paintings of her while she has a conversation with her own right hand?"-Steve, Coupling "This will not be quick. You will not enjoy this. I am not your queen."-Queen Gorgo, 300 "Who's the bitterest man in the living room? The bitterest man in the living room?"-Chandler, Friends "Well, I'm guessing he wants to do a little dance, make a little love...well, pretty much get down tonight."-Chandler, Friends "But you know you always see these beautiful women with 'nothing' guys? You could be one of those guys."-Pheobe, Friends "Pants and a sweater? Why Mom? Who am I going to meet in a black-out? Power company guys? Elligible looters?"-Monica, Friends "What's messing you up? The wine? The candles? The moonlight?"-Joey, Friends "Oh-no, I'm a fabulous mom. I bought my son his first condums." "...And then he burst into flames."-Mrs. Bing and Chandler, Friends "They're parents. After a certain point, you gotta let go. Even if you know better you got to let them make their own mistakes."-Joey, Friends "Aw, man, in my next life I'm coming back as a toliet brush."-Chandler, Friends "So, it's a typical day work. I'm in putting my numbers and Big All calls me into his office and tells me he wants to make me Processing Supervisor. So...I quit."-Chandler, Friends "Well if you can't talk dirty to me, than you can't talk dirty to her. Now tell me you want to caress my butt!"-Joey, Friends "Well, smack my ass and call my Judy!"-Steve, Friends "Bears overboard! They're drowning! Don't just stand there, call 911. Hey fellows, grab onto a Sugar-Oat. Save yourselves!"-Steve, Friends "Are you sure? Pheobe just threw away two Jacks because they didn't look happy."-Ross, Friends "Hello, kettle, this is Monica. You're black."-Pheobe, Friends "Everything you hear in poker game is pure crap!"-Aunt Iris, Friends "Ooooh, I'm a man. Ooooh, I have a penis. Oooooh, I have to win money to exert my power over women."-Rachel, Friends "No! I'm bluffing! You guys haven't learned crap!"-Aunt Iris, Friends "Damn the jellyfish! Damn all the jellyfish!"-Monica, Friends "I fooled like a cheep hooker who got hit the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face. (sees everyone staring at him funny) ...I'm out."-Joey, Friends "The guy's the Devil. He's Satan in a smock."-Rachel, Friends "This is madness, it's madness I tell you! For the love of God, Monica, don't to it!"-Pheobe, Friends "Oh, c'mon, tell me. I could use another reason why women won't look at me."-Chandler, Friends "I can't believe you two had sex in her dream!" "I'm sorry, it was one-time thing. I was very drunk and it was someone else's subconscious."-Ross and Chandler, Friends "No! Not Barker. That man is dead. It's Todd, now. Sweeney Todd. And he shall have his revenge..."-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "The years no doubt have changed me sir, but then, I suppose the face of a barber, the face of a prisoner in the dock - is not particularly memorable."-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "There's a hole on the world like a great black pit and it is filled with people who are filled with shit and the vermin of the world inhabit it."-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "How about a shave?"-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "These are my friends. See how they glisten. See this one shine... How he smiles in the light. My friend. My faithful friend... Speak to me friend. Whisper... I'll listen. I know, I know you've been locked out of sight all these years, like me. My friend...well I've come home to find you waiting. Home, and we're together! And we'll do wonders. Won't we? You there, my friend?"-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "You there, my friend. Come, let me hold you. Now, with a sigh you grow warm in my hand, my friend, my clever friend. Rest now, my friends. Soon I'll unfold you. Soon you'll know splendors you never have dreamed all your days, my lucky friends. Till now your shine was merely silver. Friends you shall drip rubies... You'll soon drip precious rubies..."-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "Alright! You sir, you sir, how about a shave? Come and visit your good friend Sweeney. You sir, you sir? Welcome to the grave. I will have vengenance. I will have salvation. Who sir, you sir? No one in the chair, come on! Come on! Sweeney's waiting. I want you bleeders. You sir - anybody. Gentlemen don't be shy! Not one man, no, no ten men. Not a hundred can assuage me - I will have you! And I will get him back even as he gloats. In the meantime I'll practice on dishonorable throats."-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "They all deserve to die. Tell you why, Mrs. Lovett, tell you why. Because in all of the whole human race, Mrs Lovett, there are two kinds of men and only two. There's the one they put in his proper place and the one with his foot in the other one's face. Look at me, Mrs Lovett, look at you. Now we all deserve to die. Tell you why, Mrs. Lovett, tell you why. Because the lives of the wicked should be made brief. For the rest of us death will be a relief. We all deserve to die."-Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street "Let me see if I have this right. 'Gawain, the noble and chilvalrous knight of Arthur. A king's champion, his prowess with women was unsurpassed.' That is you, is it not?" "Yes, and according to that book, you're an old, bald man."-Merlin and Gawain, Lords of Avalon: Sword Of Darkness “Who gave her our phone number?” “Okay, well, who had the motive? Was it the actor (motions to Joey)? The chef (motions to Monica)? The masseuse (motions to herself)? …Or was it the guy who is dating her?”-Rachel and Pheobe, Friends "You know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half pure evil!"-Ross, Friends Ross: Oh, really? Well, I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City. "(watches sumo wrestling) Ironically, these are the guys who were picked last in gym."-Ross, Friends (Monica knocks) "Rach, I can sense when women are depressed and vunerable. It's one of my gifts."-Joey, Friends "I guess I should have known... we'd be out somewhere, and a beautiful woman would go by, and Carol would go, 'Ross, look at her.' And I'd think, 'My wife is cool.'"-Ross, Friends (Ross is newly divorced from his lesbian wife) "How you doin'?"-Joey, Friends "C'mon, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie. It's cheating on Rachel in her house of worship."-Chandler, Friends "Why, yes, Ross. Pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of Narnia."-Chandler, Friends "She is so bad that she makes me want to put my fingers through my eyes and swirl my brain around."-Terry, Friends "Ducks is heads because...ducks have heads!" "What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday?"-Joey and Chandler, Friends "Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again and he got you thinking this is a great idea? This man is my God!"-Joey, Friends "Go for it man. Jump off the high dive. Stare down the barrel of a gun. Pee in the wind!" "Joe, I assure you if I'm staring down the barrel of a gun, I'll be peeing every which way."-Joey and Chandler, Friends "Dude, I totally understand. Usually when I have baby with a woman I like to slow things down!"-Joey, Friends "If you hadn't just had a baby with my best friend I swear to Lucifer a rabid dog would be feasting on your danglers right now."-Phoebe, Friends "All I'm saying is that Joey and Charlie don't have anything in common." "I don't know, they seemed to have a shared interest in each other's tonsils."-Rachel and Ross, Friends "I get home and I see Julie's sailing solution on my nighttable and I'm thinking to myself: Oh my God, what the hell am I doing?! I mean, here I am with Julie, this incrediable, great woman who I care about and who cares about me and I'm like what, just going to throw all that away?" "You got all that from sailing solution?"-Ross and Joey, Friends "Has it never occured to you to be kind to the very thing that is keeping you from falling to the ground?" "Blaise would never drop us." "How do you know?" "Because the fall wouldn't kill my king. It would only make him angry, and then he would nail my scaly hide to his wall as a trophy."-Seren, Kerrigan, and Blaise (Order: Seren, Kerrigan, Seren, Blaise), Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "Merlin will kill us if we don't return with her." "You and your bright ideas. I swear, Gawain, I should have strangled you at birth. 'We'll tell just her who we are and she'll come with us willingly. No problem.' Damn you for the stupidity. I should have left your rank ass in the twenty-first century instead of bringing you home." "I wish you had. I certainly prefer it to this. Not that it matters. What was your bright idea to get her away from Morgan? Huh? You didn't have one at all, did you, Brother Intellect?"-Gawain and Agravain, Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "Chasity. You had to pick that one, huh?"-Elaine, Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "What happened to make you so cynical?" "Life, my lady. Sooner or later, it destroys the potential in us all. As we strive like ants dancing to the command of our queen, it passess us by while we dream of a better place and time. Then one day all too soon, you awaken to find yourself old and shriveled, still working for others while you have nothing left but memories of work and suffering. Your potential gone, it leaves nothing in its wake. Nothing but hatred and bitterness to accompany you to your grave. You may take your potential if it comforts you. But I know the truth."-Seren and Kerrigan, Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "I used to enjoy being evil. It wears thin, doesn't it?" "Not really. Better than being good. At least the people here are far more entertaining. You never know when one of them is going to run you in the back, trying to kill you...well, for me that's true. They're damnded to scared of you to try it. Maybe that's part of your problem, my king. You've made them too scared of you. But either way, god guys never fight dirty. You always know what expect from them."-Kerrigan and Blaise, Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "Why do I have a feeling that you are about to do something stupid?" "Most likely because I am about to do something stupid." "And is there a particular reason for this act of stupidity?" "Not really." "Well in that case, I shall guard her zealously rather than join you in said stupidity, as I try my best to always avoid such moments."-Blaise and Kerrigan, Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "Is there anything I can get you, my lord?" "A Tylenol would be great."-Seren and Kerrigan, Lords of Avalon: Sword of Darkness "They're not hellspawns, they're my children!"-Alana, Celtic Aurora's Intrusive Dusk "It says that pretty pink haired girls should make hot sexy love to me."-Madara, Vesper chan's Voyager en sécurité “You mean you won’t be able to play?” “Of course I can play! It’s been ever so long since I watched the life leave someone’s eyes.”-Ephidel and Me, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente "If that doesn’t finish him off, use your magic on him. But not Fire,” “Aww, but whyyyyy?” “Because he’s obviously got some resistance to Fire! Use Thunder instead!” "But it’s not fun! There’s not that comforting warmth that makes me feel so special!” “Fine then. You can get roasted to extra-crispy in this comforting warmth of yours. Then you’ll be Special #4.” “So long as I’m kosher! IN AMERICA!!”-Zac and Dodds, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “Thunder, please forgive me! I deeply regret forsaking the power you proffered to me! GRANT ME YOUR STRENGTH!!” Dear God, I hope you never get Bolting. I need new friends…”-Dodds and Zac, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “So… how far did ya get? Third base? Am I right?”-Raquel, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “So what did they request of you?” “They want me to go back to Nergal’s lair and retrieve some artifact that the old curmudgeon had. Ridiculous.” “Hm. They want me to assassinate someone again.” “Oh, life is so hard for you.” “Hey, the sarcasm is my gig!” “You’ve rubbed off on me. More than I’m comfortable with, actually.” “Anytime, Ephy! Anytime.” “Don’t call me that.”-Me and Ephidel, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “Grr! I’m a vampire!” “Right. And I’m Frankenstein.” “Really? I have to say, the resemblance is striking!”-Me and Jackson lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “I am the darkness, you fool!”-Me, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “Awww, does ickle Ephy need an Advil?” “I told you to never call me that.” “What’s wrong, Ephy-kuuuuuun?” “I am aware that we are supposed to be ‘the bad guys’, but you are just pure evil, Darian.”-Me and Ephidel, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “AVERT YOUR EYES!!”-Maddie, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “You’ve got some blood on your hair, you know.” “Pshh. Whatever can you mean? I just dipped my hair in wine.” "Right. The Court Cards will throw a fit if you’re not back by morning. Are you sure you’ve got enough time to wash out that… wine?” “Not to worry. With you as my faithful steed, I’ve got all the time in the world!” “I am not your steed, Darian.” “Ah, so you’re my bitch, then?” “NO.” “How about Trogdor, then?” “For heaven’s sake, I thought you gave that up a week ago!”-Ephidel and me, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “Hey Maddie, is that your variation on the Cha-Cha Slide?” “Shut up and get back to killing people, Raquel!”-Raquel and Maddie, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “My money’s on the guy with horns! Go, Satan Man!”-Raquel, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “Just who died and made you God, huh? You don’t have the right to tell them who they can and can’t be with!”-Angel, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente “But you know, I don’t care how hot you are. You’re going down, little man!”-Angel, lockheedelektra's Triple Entente "LISTEN UP, YOU PATHETIC EXCUSES FOR AN EXISTENCE!! YOU’D BETTER PRAY TO YOUR IMPOTENT GOD, BECAUSE I AM COMING TO RIP YOUR HEART OUT AND EAT IT IN FRONT OF YOU!!” “Darian and I had heard the Face Cards talk of an auxiliary army such as this one.” “—AND THEN I SHALL USE YOUR RIBS TO BASH YOUR SKULLS IN A PERCUSSIVE CHORUS—” “The way the Face Cards spoke of them, however, made them seem not only terribly weak but also abhorrently cowardly…” “—AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT I’LL DO WITH YOUR SPLEEN?!—” “… So we both agreed that a tactic like this would be most beneficial in giving us an advantage over their large numbers.” “—THEN I’LL GRIND YOU ALL INTO MEAT PIES AND FEED YOU TO THE HELLHOUNDS IN MY BACKYARD!! NOW RUN TO YOUR DEMISE, FOOLS!!”-Me and Ephidel (he is talking to Maddie), lockheedelektra's Triple Entente "Keep your eyes on me, ladies. Cheap parlor tricks are extremely erotic."-Duke Deblin, Yugioh the abridged series "Your mother plays card games in hell!"-Possesed Teddy Bear, Yugioh the abridged series "You'll be the first to die."-Possesed Teddy Bear, Yugioh the abridged series "Holy (beep) on a sandwich with (beep) on top! And a side helping of (beep)!"-Tristan, Yugioh the abridged series "It's the truth! The voices in my head tell me so. Isn't that right, Teddy?" "Hail Satan!"-Rebecca and Possesed Teddy Bear, Yugioh the abridged series "What are the odds his balls will explode?"-Parker, Leverage "Where's Joey?" "Joey ate my last stick of gum so I killed him. (Monica gives him a look) And you think that would be wrong?"-Monica and Chandler, Friends "You're not finished with her." "Our babies will be smart and beautiful." "And not to mention imaginary."-Sheldon and Leonard, The Big Bang Theory "Oh Gravity! Thou art a heartless bitch."-Sheldon, The Big Bang Theory "At this point I should inform you that I intend to form my own team and destroy the molecular bonds that bind your very matter together and reduce the resulting particulate chaos to tears." "Thanks for the heads up." "You're welcome. ...One more thing." "Yes?" "It's on, bitch."-Sheldon and Leonard, The Big Bang Theory "For what it's worth, my mother says that when we decieve for personal gain, we make Jesus cry."-Sheldon, The Big Bang Theory "GIMME THE FUCKING COOKIE!"-One of the boys that sat at my lunch table "Because we look hot, hot, hot, we are sexy..." "Marik, that doesn't rhyme." "SHUT UP! I'M LADY GAGA!"-Marik and Bakura, Leather Pants "Help! There's a peck here with an acorn and he's pointing it right at me!"-Mad Martigan, Willow "What's sexting?" "I'm not having this conversation right now."-Paker and Elliot, Leverage "You are so naked." "I know." "You are naked!" "We've established that." "You're happy and naked!"-Grace and Julian, Fantasy Lover by Sherrilyn Kenyon "Okay, can you reach the pedals?" "I'd like to reach your pedals..." "Julian! Would you concentrate?" "All right, I'm concentrating." "I don't mean on my breasts."-Grace and Julian, Fantasy Lover by Sherrilyn Kenyon "You know, you really shouldn't fondle that in front of me, Grace. It's cruel." "Julian! Do you mind? I'm only trying to show you how to shift my gears." "I wish you'd shift my gear like that."-Julian and Grace, Fantasy Lover by Sherrilyn Kenyon "I'm a veal type of guy and you're too old for me to eat. (cracks the man's neck) But not to kill. (turns to a vampire) I feel better now."-Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer "Oh please. If every vampire who said he was at the Crucifixation was there, it would be Woodstock."-Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer "I MAY HAVE GOD'S APPROVAL BUT I WONDER IF ITS OKAY FOR ME TO PLUMMEL HIM TO DUST?"-Hungary, Hetalia "Ah, big bro! What does 'intercourse' mean?" "Hahaha! You don't know what that is, Italy? It's an act you do with someone you like." "Oooh!" "In other words, with that someone you like, you do things like *moan* and *AHHHH!* them with your hand, and then you go *Ohhh* with your mouth and bite their *WOW!*. Afterwards, they lick the *WOAH!* down there like a lollipop. After all that, you do that thing with the *beeeeeeeeeeeeeep*."-Italy and Fance, Hetalia "Piss on this, bishop!"-Ellen, The Pillars of the Earth "You don't need money to loosen people's tongue."-Regan, The Pillars of the Earth "Oh, Odion, I got you an early birthday present. It's called being stabbed in the eye socket. I hope you don't already have one."-Melvin, Yu-gi-oh the Abridged Series "My hair is assaulting you." "I'm actually going to do something. My voice knows gives me super strengfth!" "Yeah, but my hair gives me the power to defy gravity!" "Oh the humanity!" -Tristan and the Hair Guy, Yu-gi-oh the Abridged Series "Stick to the plan, Izzy." "Then stop putting gorgeous, sexy kings in my face, Viviane." -Viviane and Isabel, P.C. Cast's Goddess of Legend "How come you get to call me Izzy, and I'm not allowed to call you Viv?" "Who is the goddess here, Izzy?" "Okay, good point."- Isabel and Viviane, P.C. Cast's Goddess of Legend "Oh, Isabel, I had no... It was... Did you guys know that they have these big picklelike things?" "Oh, no! What did I miss?" "We were discussing pickles." "What's so funny about that?" "I did not say pickle! I said picklelike. It sort of sticks out like this, and it's kind of wrinkly and--" "Stop! I'm going to split my spleen."-Mary, Jenny, Gwen, and Isabel (order: Mary, Jenny, Gwen, Jenny, Mary, and Isabel), P.C. Cast's Goddess of Legend "I have a new found appreciation for pickles. The big ones."- Mary, P.C. Cast's Goddess of Legend "Nobody pushes Luigi!!"-My friend Michelle when she's playing as Luigi in Super Mario Brothers "Don't touch me! Don't touch me!"-My friend Michelle when she's playing as Luigi in Super Mario Brothers "Get off my face!"-My friend Michelle when she's playing as Luigi in Super Mario Brothers "I love you, Edward." "And I love you...Bella." (knock knock) "Hold on. Who is it?" "Oh, you know who." (volley of bullets appeare and blood and guts go flying) "A real fucking vampire." -"Bella", "Edward", and Alucard, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "There! I took the fucking shot! She's dead! There's blood everywhere!" "Oh, you are just a treat."-Seras Victoria and Alucard, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "See, that would be intimidating if you were, well, intimidating." "Grrr... Are you mocking me?!" "Oh, no, no, no. Pffft, yeah!"-Homicidal Vampire Priest and Alucard, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "I'm sure if you look deep into your heart--which is currently all over that tree--you'll find a way to forgive me. ...Oh jeez, you're like a puppy. A blonde, eviscerated puppy. Christ, fine, I'll help you! But only because you have nice tits."-Alucard, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "Ooooh, I never hunted down a leprechaun before! Do you think if I shot it with my gun Lucky Charms will explode everywhere?"-Alucard, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 ""So what can I do for you Father O'Malley O'Connell O'Cathain O'Riley O'Brien O'Sullivan? Who is also Italian?" "And killing the vampires?" "Oh, just try to fucking stop me." "And what about Protestants?" "Second verse, same as the first. Now put me on a plane so I can put them in herse."-Alexander Anderson and Enrico Maxwell , *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "Heeey, Police-Girl! Police-Girl! This is awesome! You should totally join in! Seriously, there's like, 40 zombies in here! Just one shot in the head and they explode! It's like House of the Dead, only, like, a hundred times more awesome!" "Fine! I'll shoot some of the rotten bastards! Can't be that much fun. ...Oh, fuck the hell yes!" "Sweet black fucking Sabbath! If I wasn't holding up with that beast of a woman Integra, I'd fuck the red right out of those eyes." (knives stab Police Girl) "Well, kind of like that but with less symbolism and more my penis in your vagina."-Alucard and Seras Victoria *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "Suddenly, it reeks with hypocrisy here. Oh, if it isn't the Catholic Church!"-Alucard, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "See? This kind of shit is why I stopped going to church..." "Just shut up! Where the Hell is Alucard?!" "How the blood-soaked Protestant Hell did you do that?!" "Son of a Protestant whore!"-Alexander Anderson, *TFS* Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1 "What, me, celibate? The whores would go begging from Dorne to Casterly Rock. No, I just want to stand on the top of the Wall and piss off the edge of the world."-Tyrion, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "What a jape the gods have made of us two. By all rights, you ought to be in skirts and me in mail."-Cersei Baratheon, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground."-Cersei Baratheon, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "And to Rhaego, son of Drogo, the stallion who will mount the world, to him I also a pledge a gift. To him I will give this iron chair his mother's father sat in. I will give him Seven Kingdoms. I, Drogo, khal, will do this thing. I will take my khalasar west where the world ends, and ride the wooden horses across the black salt water as no khal has done before. I will kill the men in the iron suits and tear down their stone houses. I will rape their women, take their children as slaves, and bring their broken gods back to Vaes Dothrak to bow down beneath the Mother of Mountains. This I vow, I, Drogo son of Bharbo. This I swear before the Mother of Mountains, as the stars look down in witness."-Khal Drogo, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "And I am Daenerys Stormborn, Daenerys of House Targaryen, of the blood of Aegon the Conqueror and Maegor the Cruel and old Valyria before them. I am the dragon's daughter, and I swear to you, these men will die screaming. Now bring me to Khal Drogo."-Daenerys Stormborn, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "My lord father taught me that it was death to bare steel against your liege lord, but doubtless you only meant to cut my meat." “Your meat is bloody tough.”-Robb Stark and Lord Greatjon Umber, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Winter is coming."-Eddard "Ned" Stark, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "I'm not a cripple!" "Then I am not a dwarf. My father will rejoice to hear it."-Bran Stark and Tyrion Lannister, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Is this some trap, Lannister? What's Bran to you? Why should you want to help him?" "Your brother Jon asked it of me. And I have a tender spot in my heart for cripples and bastards and broken things."-Robb Stark and Tyrion Lannister, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "You are slow to learn, Lord Eddard. Distrusting me was the wisest thing you've done since you climbed down off your horse."-Petyr Baelish, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "This man came as a guest into my house, and there conspired to murder my son, a boy of seven. In the name King Robert and the good lords you serve, I call upon you to seize him and help me return him to Winterfall to await the King's justice."-Catelyn Stark, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Life is not a song, sweetling. You may learn that one day in your sorrow."-Petyr Baelish, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Spare me your empty compliments, girl...and your ser's. I am no knight. I spit on them and their vows."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Game of Thrones "You're like one of those birds from the Summer Isles, aren't you? A pretty little talking bird, repeating all the pretty little words they taught you to recite."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Game of Thrones "That gorget wasn't fastened proper. You think Gregor didn't notice that? You think Ser Gregor's lance rode up by chance, do you? Pretty little talking girl, you believe that, you're empty-headed as a bird for true. Gregor's lance goes where Gregor wants it to go."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Look at me. Look at me! There's a pretty for you. Take a good long stare. You know you want to. I've watched you turning away all the way down the kingsroad. Piss on that. Take your look."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Gregor never said a word, just picked me up under his arm and shoved the side of my face down in the burning coals and held me there while I screamed and screamed. You saw how strong he is. Even then, it took three grown men to drag him off me. The septons preach about the seven hells. What do they know? Only a man who's been burned knows what hell is truly like."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Game of Thrones "My father told everyone my bedding had caught fire and our maester gave me ointments. Ointments! Gregor got his ointments too. Four years later, they anointed him with the seven oils and he recited his knightly vows and Rhaegar Targaryen tapped him on the shoulder and said 'Arise, Ser Gregor'."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Game of Thrones "A Lannister always pays his debts."-Tyrion Lannister, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "Lady Stark, I would offer you my sword, but I seem to have mislaid it." "It is not your sword I want, ser. Give me my father and my brother Edmure. Give me my daughters. Give me my lord husband." "I have mislaid them as well, I fear." "A pity."-Jaime Lannister and Catelyn Stark, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "That's what I'll to give you, Lady Sansa. Your brother's head." "Maybe my brother will give me your head."-Joffery Baratheon and Sansa Stark, George Martin's A Game of Thrones "I'm sure I don't know. That fool of Eddard Stark accused me of the same thing. He hinted that Lord Arryn suspected or...well, believed..." "That you were fucking our sweet Jaime?" "*slap*" "Did you think I was blind as Father? Who you lie with is no matter to me...although it doesn't seem quite just that you should open legs for one brother and not the other." "*slap*" "Be gentle, Cersei, I'm only jesting with you. If truth be old, I'd sooner have a nice whore. I never understood what Jaime say in you, apart from his own reflection."-Cersei and Tyrion Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "When you tear out a man's tongue, you are not proving him a liar, you're only telling the world that you fear what he might say."-Tyrion Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "A hound will die for you, but never lie to you. And he'll look you straight in the face."-Sandor Clegane "The Hound", George Martin's A Clash of Kings "There's my lord husband. And here's my sweet suckling babe."-Asha, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "There are no men like me. There's only me."-Jaime Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "Then surely it was to have your pleasure of me? It's said that widows grow weary of their empty beds. We of the Kingsguard vow never to wed, but I suppose I could still service you if that's what you need. Pour us some of that wine and slip out of that gown and we'll see if I'm up to it."-Jaime Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "Oh, it's truth you want? Be careful, my lady. Tyrion says that people often claim to hunger for the truth, but seldom like the taste once it's served up."-Jaime Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "I seldom fling children from towers to improve their health. Yes, I meant for him to die."-Jaime Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "I will say, I think it passing odd that I am loved by one for a kindness I never did, and reviled by so many for my finest act."-Jaime Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "I've never lain with any woman but Cersei. In my own way, I have been truer than your Ned ever was. Poor old dead Ned."-Jaime Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "Jaime told me once that he only feels truly alive alive in battle and in bed. I would sooner face any number of swords than sit helpless like this, pretending to enjoy the company of this flock of frightened hens."-Cersei Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "Have I shocked you, my lady? You little fool. Tears are not a woman's only weapon. You've got one between your legs and you've best learn to use it. You'll find men use their swords freely enough. Both kinds of swords."-Cersei Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "The only way to keep your people loyal is to make certain they fear you more than they do the enemy."-Cersei Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "When we were little, Jaime and I were so much alike that even our lord father could not tell us apart. Sometimes as a lark we would dress in each other's clothes and spend a whole day each as the other. Yet even so, when Jaime was given his sword, there was none for me. 'What do I get?' I remember asking. We were so much alike, I could never understand why they treated us so differently. Jaime learned to fight with a sword and lace and mace, while I was taught to smile and sing and please. He was heir to Casterly Rock, while I was to be sold to some stranger like a horse, to be ridden whenever my new owner liked, beaten whenever he liked, and cast aside in time for a younger filly. Jaime's lot was to be glory and power, while mine was birth and moonblood."-Cersei Lannister, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "The Red God has his due, sweet girl, and only death may pay for life. This girl took three that were his. This girl must give three in their places. Speak the names, and a man will do the rest."-Jaqen H'ghar, George Martin's A Clash of Kings "I wanted to preserve your unique genius, your brilliance...your enormous capacity for good." "I beg your pardon. I'm afraid you've really lost me there. I think you must have a wire crossed somewhere."-Nadir and Erik, "The Phantom, Susan Kay's Phantom "Firearms have no place in the hands of children. I advise you to put that thing away, boy, before you hurt yourself."-Erik, "The Phantom, Susan Kay's Phantom "Love can cost you you your soul, but could also bring it back again."-Stefanie Cole's The Phantom Returns "We will meet again when you have your victory. Bring me the head of that slippery-tongued traitor Tariq Khan, and Sher Shah bound to serve as my latrine cleaner."-Khanzada, Alex Rutherford's A Kingdom Divided "I may be Love's bitch but at least I'm man enough to admit it."-Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer "Do we really need weapons for this?" "Why don't your rip your lungs out? That might make an impression."-Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer "Well, if at first you don't succeed, I'll kill him."-Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer "And lo, the beast looked upon the face of beauty, and beauty stayed his hand. And from that day forward, he was as one dead."-Carl Denham, King Kong "What are you, Mr. Driscoll? A lion, or a chimpanzee?"-Captain Englehorn, King Kong "That's the thing about cockroaches. No matter how many times you flushed them down the toilet, they always crawl back up the bowl."-Captain Englehorn, King Kong "This feeling inside. I'm not one of those who can easily hide. Is this ok? Is this what you want?" "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return."-Toulouse-Lautrec, Moulin Rogue "Never fall in love with a woman who sells herself. It always ends bad!"-The Argentinean, Moulin Rogue "The show must go on, Satine. We're creatures of the underworld. We can't afford to love."-Zidler, Moulin Rogue "We have a dance in the brothels of Buenos Aires. It tells the story of the prostitute and a man who falls in love with her. First, there is desire. Then, passion. Then, suspicion. Jealousy. Anger. Betrayal. When love is for the highest bidder, there can be no trust. Without trust, there can be no love. Jealousy, yes, jealousy will drive you mad."-The Argentinean, Moulin Rogue "You're going to be bad for business. I can tell."-Satine, Moulin Rogue "The hills are made with the euphonious symphonies of descant..." "We're not selling jeans here."-Billy Beane, Michael Lewis's Moneyball "Hey, you fucking creep, in this shit hole I've got monopoly on that one."-Lisbeth Salander, Stieg Larsson's The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo "Do you like pain, creep?"-Lisbeth Salander, Stieg Larsson's The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo "It's against the rules. It's a chain of command thing. I'm naked. He salutes."-Sally Harper, Coupling "I don't know. Could his nose really fit inside the mask? That's MY question."-arglefumph, Phoenix Wright: Trials and Tribulations, Episode 2, Part 1 "I swear, men act like there is some cosmic reward for crazy proposals. What a woman really wants is a man down on one knee, tears in his eyes, and ring in his hand." -Martha Rogers, Castle "You're Nikki Heat, he's Jameson Rook. I need to sleep with him in the name of character research."-Natalie, Castle "You bitch." "No, dear. The bitch is the skank you paid to have sex with you."-Mr. Voss and former Mrs. Voss, Castle "I've been feeling a bit down. I'm thinking about taking my own life posthaste. Miss Watson here beside herself about it. Does that window open?"-Sherlock, Elementary "Your drill is the drill that will pierce the Heavens!"-Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "Listen up, Simon. Don't believe in yourself. Believe in me! Believe in the Kamina who believes in you!"-Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "Listen Simon... Don't forget. Believe in yourself. Not in the you who believes in me. Not the me who believes in you. Believe in the you who believes in yourself."-Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "Don't be held back by someone else's bullshit in fake memories.The one path you chose for yourself, is the truth of your universe."-Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "You just have a secret fetish, don't you?"-Shepard, Sarah1281's Terrible Parenting "You want an unicorn now, too, don't you?" "Don't be ridiculous, John." "Ridiculous, is it?" "I don't do things by halves. I would demand an army of unicorns."-John and Mycroft, Sarah1281's Fish and Chips Friday "In days of old, when knights were bold, and condoms not invented... They wrapped old socks around their cocks and babies were prevented."-Diana Gabaldon More favorite quotes shall be updated soon. And remember what Mad-Eye Moody always says... "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile. Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent that aren't, copy this, put it in you profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, Weasel Chick, Revenant666, dragonsroar, foxdude33, FallenLex, Soelle, Sunstar Kitsune, Insane Slytherin, Nameless Heretic, My PenName is . . . , Twilight L. Xari, Caellach Tiger Eye, SpeedDemon315, If you've ever been called weird and taken that as a compliment, copy this into your profile. If you have been called a bitch and took it as a compliment, copy this into your profile. 92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off (at Abercrombie and Fitch, not at the other 92 percent). Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this into your profile! (THIS IS THE ANTI-STEREOTYPE SECTION, IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST THESE COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS, PASTE IT ON YOUR PROFILE!) --Goths MUST worship Satan because they wear black--(you don't know how many times I received such bigotry from some people) --people who like anime MUST be nerds-- --All blonds MUST be stupid--(this is one of my biggest pet peeves...) --people who like vampires MUST be insane-- AND HERE'S THE MORAL OF STEREOTYPES: LET THEM ALL FREAKING DIE! :.:7 Ways to Scare your roommates:.: 7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon..." 6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil. 5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks. 4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan. 3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you are hungry. 2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?" 1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer." If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile. If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination, copy and paste here. If you think rap is the most awful thing to ever be called "music", and that rappers are wanna-be's who are getting paid to make fools out of themselves and can't even sing, copy and paste this into your profile. I think that the Phantom of the Opera doesn't deserve to have people hate him. I think his voice is like an angel's. If you would be the one to love the Phantom forever, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think Christine should be slapped upside her head for choosing Raoul over the Phantom(who we all know is clearly the better choice), copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a hard-nosed, conservative, Republican-type person with little time for wishy-washy, feel-good nonsense, copy and paste this into your profile. I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile. If you're writing a novel or book that ISN'T fanfiction, copy and paste this into your profile. If you're a perfectionist, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this in your profile. If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile. If you carry around a dictionary and/or a thesaurus and are proud of it, copy and paste this to your profile. LOGOMANIACS UNITE! If you think Tuomas Holopainen is the most amazing lyricist and sexiest keyboard player you've ever seen, copy and paste this into your profile. If you became a lycan supporter after Rise of the Lycans, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think Lucian is completely and totally bad-ass super special awesome, copy and paste this into your profile. SOOKIE STACKHOUSE/ERIC NORTHMAN AND BUFFY SUMMERS/SPIKE FOREVER!!! I can't just forget these... Pairings I like: Naruto: SakuraXOrochimaru (My biggest obsession. Seriously, I beginning to think getting them together is one of my main goals...) SakuraXItachi (Typical but I like it. It's possible!) SakuraXKisame (Pretty possible. I mean, Kisame rocks my socks as well. And his sword...that's a wonderful piece of work, right there! A chakra-feeding sword? How resourceful and clever is that?) SakuraXSasori (I always believed they should have gotten together. They make one awesome couple.) SakuraXGaara (I just think it's cute. They too would be a good couple.) SakuraXNeji (Again, I enjoy this one. Opposites attract!) SakuraXDeidara (Deidara is just a fun-loving guy. These two would get along perfectly!) SakuraXNaruto (XD Yeah, it's an usual pairing like SakuraXItachi but it is still cute. They were meant for each other. Then again, Sakura can be meant for a lot of guys...) SakuraXKakashi (Hey, she is his ex-student now so it's very possible it could happen!) SakuraXKabuto (Medic power!) SakuraXGenma (One very intriguing couple. Genma needs someone with a firm backbone to keep him in line.) SakuraXShikamaru (So not troublesome for Shikamaru! Beware their intelligence!) SakuraXHaku (I dunno, I just enjoy this one. It's sweet and fulfilling in its own way.) SakuraXZabuza (Even he needs some lovin'. This would be such a wicked paring.) SakuraXShino (It's a well-known fact that bugs are attracted to blossoms.) SakuraXKiba (Just picture it, okay? It's quite a lovable scene right there.) SakuraXZaku (She can shed some light in that bleak life of his and he can offer her strength to move on.) SakuraXYondaime (I know, I know, he's 'probably' Naruto's dad but this pairing is too darn cool! I simply love it!) SakuraXObito (Even the dead should be allowed to have some love. That's why you have me, a necromancer, to solve the 'Obito is deceased' problem. Though there is some discussion that he's Tobi...) SakuraXHidan (C'mon, Hidan's the man! Plus, I absolutely adore his weapon; it's so grand!) SakuraXLee (Yeah, so what about his hairdo and eyebrows! Since when does appearances matter? It's all about the heart, people!) SakuraXTobi (Heh, just found this pairing quite adorable. And I just discovered that Tobi's true identity is Uchiha Madara-whoever that is!) SakuraXZetsu (Shoot me, I don't care if it's a crack pairing or not, the pairing is really neat.) SakuraXKyuubi (Don't ask. I just do.) SakuraXShukaku (Same reason for pairing above.) SakuraXPein (He's quite a mysterious fellow, ja? Basically, I like Sakura with any member of the Akatsuki, except Konan. I do not support Yuri or Yaoi for that matter.) SakuraXSuigetsu (Exotic, exotic, exotic, need I say more? I know this and majority of these pairings are implausible but you know what, they're still fun!) SakuraXIruka (...I always thought this was intriguing. But that's just me.) SakuraXKimimaro (Two words: KICK ASS.) SakuraXKidomaru (Heh heh heh...because I can and it will be fun to write about. Didn't I tell you all that I like unique, exotic, 'crack' pairings and such?) SakuraXSakon/Ukon (Brotherly quarrel over Sakura -snickers-. How amusing. I like putting Sakura together with Oto ninja-in case you haven't conjectured that already- because it just too damn cool to describe!) SakuraXSai (Do I have to elaborate on this one? I believe it is slightly obvious.) SakuraXIbiki (Please, please, save your outrage for someone else. I won't be listening to it.) SakuraXIdate (Idate? Some of you might ask. He's a sort of main character in one of those filler episodes. Quite intelligent, I can see him and Sakura establishing some sort of a relationship.) InoXNaruto (Thanks to backlash symphony, I'm hooked to it.) InoXDeidara (Not just because they look similar, it's personality-wise as well. Can't you just imagine Ino yelling at him and Deidara smirking and saying "Yeah,"?) InoXNeji (A truly exotic pairing that's well worth it.) InoXShikamaru (An usual paring but I still like it.) InoXChoji (They look great together. 'Nough said.) InoXGenma (Those two were made for each other. Seriously.) InoXZetsu (UchihaSakura-always had it in one of her stories I was reading and after explaining why she picked it I thought, 'Hey, you know, it just might work.') TenTenXLee (Again, those two are great together.) TenTenXDeidara (You'll have to read Infatuated-Simplicity's A Gift of Life-it's NejiXSakura by the way-to understand why.) HinataXKiba (Perfect couple. Like this one better than NarutoXHinata.) HinataXShino (It's cute, they carry similar traits.) HinataXChoji (I think they go rather well together.) TemariXShikamaru (I really don't have to explain myself to this one, correct?) TemariXGenma (I thought about it and said, "Well, why not?") Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones SelenaXCaellach (How can you not see this one? It's like a classic.) SelenaXValter (BEST PAIRING IN TSS! I am "suffering" from a monstrous, adamant epidemic of this couple. It appears I am irrevocably obsessed with this pairing-I can't get enough of it. Probably due to the fact Valter and Selena are two of some of my all-time favorite characters in TSS. It's more fun this way-they'll have a huge foundation to develop. Hate turns into alliance that turns into love...heh heh heh... I like to call this pairing the "Beauty and the Beast shipping".) CormagXNatasha (Uh, I just do, okay?) CormagXTana (Same answer for pairing above.) JoshuaXNatasha (It could work. Replaying the game over and over can do this to you.) JoshuaXMarisa (I don't feel the need to justify myself for this one.) MarisaXGerik (Are you bloody blind! How can you deny this one? It's ripe for the picking!) EirikaXSeth (Same situation with very first pairing-SelenaXCaellach. The only reason it's not so blatantly obvious is that Seth is in denial and Eirika is just plain confused and naive.) EirikaXInnes (Yeah, this one is a given.) LyonXEirika (I did wish these two had gotten together at the end of the game but sadly, you can't marry a corpse.) ValterXAmelia (This just came out of nowhere and hit me while I was asleep. So now I adopt a new code for Valter and his relationship with females: if it's not Selena, Zecilys (my OC), or any other OC, then he goes to Amelia. Sorry, I'm addicted to unusual pairings such as these.) ValterXMarisa (If it's not Amelia, than it's to Marisa. I just found this pairing so exotic and both of their enemies fear them, so it could work. It will just take time and patience.) CaellachXMarisa (Eh, leave me alone.) CaellachXAmelia (Don't want to hear it. SECOND BEST PAIRING IN TSS! I dub it the "Grado Heroes shipping".) EphraimXL'Arachel (They can work it out. Ephraim can tolerate her somewhat and their strengths override each other's weaknesses.) RennacXL'Arachel (It's bloody hilarious but perfect! They can be the funniest couple in TSS.) KnollXNatasha (They're compatible enough to work together, I see no fault in this one.) Fire Emblem JaffarXNino (You absolutely DO NOT mess with this. They were meant to be. That's final. None of this ErkXNino or JaffarXwith someone else crap.) FlorinaXHector (I don't really have explain this one, do I?) FlorinaXKent (He's not the one to scare her quite easily, so it can work.) FlorinaXLloyd (Leave me alone, I've grown rather attached to it.) FlorinaXEphidel (Unexpected, ja? I believe both of them can afford to undergo some...changes.) FlorinaXHeath (It's so charming. I would like to thank Wyrmseeker's story, Plummet, for stimulating me to be intrigued with this pairing.) FlorinaXSain (I always enjoy a pairing of opposites. They wouldn't get together right away but in time, if Sain plays his cards right, she'll warm up to him.) LynXKent (I always thought it was rather endearing. Plus, it kicks arse.) LynXSain (Heh, it's completely comical with Sain in the picture. It appears implausible but that is the beauty of it.) LynXRath (Same response for FlorinaXHector.) LynXEliwood (See response above.) LynXEphidel (I'm a little iffy on it yet it's intriguing enough.) EliwoodXNinain (Again, see response before the pairing above this one.) HeathXPriscilla (Reminds me of the CormagXTana pairing a bit. They seem to work fairly compatible together.) HeathXVaida (Yeah, those two would be great together. I don't need to explain myself on this one too, ja?) LinusXSerra (I came up with this one after a few moments of contemplation and could not stop chuckling for a bit. Think about it, they are both "crazy" so let's pair the two "crazies" up together, shall we?) KarelXSerra (IVIaedhros got me hooked onto this pairing. When I think about it, they're wonderful together!) MatthewXSerra (-laughs- Oh yes, they would make such an interesting couple. It's kind of cute, when you think about it. I thank Lzn64 for intriguing me into this couplet.) OswinXSerra (EPIC WIN! Oswin is one of the very few males out there who can tolerate her tongue and behavior and furthermore, they're a dear together.) LuciusXVaida (Again, I wholly thank IVIaedhros for getting me intrigued with this couple. Like I said before, opposites attract and I believe this pairing can work very sufficiently.) DartXFarina (Kitten Kisses really showed me how cute and perfect these two are for each other. I can totally imagine them having wild adventures together and finding all sorts of treasure.) SainXFiora (Can't believe it took me forever to remember in putting this one up... Once again, Kitten Kisses got me into this pairing--they balance each other out quite well.) SainXSerra (I've always seen these two being impish troublemakers and their personalities alone could work out well. They're so over-the-top hilarous!) HarkenXVaida (After reading their 3 support conversations and then finding out what happens to their relationship after the game, I was instantly seized by this pairing. The ending...it's so tragic (but beautiful, in a sense)! I didn't realize how perfect they other for each other until I watched their support conversations.) Kingdom of Hearts NamineXAxel (Shoot me if you want to but I like this pairing very much. Their opposite characteristics can connect together quite well.) NamineXMarluxia (Look at reason above.) Harry Potter HermioneXHarry (I don't care what people say, they should have gotten together in Book 6: HBP! They're bloody perfect for each other!) HermioneXDraco (Ah, forbidden love can be quite...enticing and more exciting, don't yah think?) HermioneXLucius (Like father, like son. This is my guilty pleasure, I simply can't seem to resist it.) HermioneXSeverus (I adore this one to tears, they have so much potential together.) HermioneXTom Riddle (Don't kill me, it'd be a great time-traveling fic!) HermioneXBlaise (Quite exotic and appealing, if you ask me.) LunaXDraco (This one compels me for some reason. They can be matched quite nicely if they're together and plus, it can be quite comical.) LunaXHarry (Uh, yeah. I believe it can work, they have been subjected to many trials together and both know what death is like.) NevilleXLavender (Yeah, Hikari Adams got me interested in this pairing. It'll work if Lav grows up and actually matures.) The Patriot TavingtonXMargaret (Just don't ask. Really, don't ask, you're not going get a real, precise answer. My love for this pairing is ineffable.) Lord of the Rings EowynXLegolas (Hey, I have nothing against EowynXFaramir but Eowyn is my favorite warrior maiden and Legolas is my favorite character/elf so...I like putting my two favorite characters together. Plus, the notion sounds so enthralling!) EowynXFaramir (I thought they were rather endearing. They're quite compatible for each other.) EowynXGrima (Before you all freak out, let me explain. In order for this to wholly work in my eyes, Grima's is going to have to undergo some major redemption. Killing Sarumon isn't going to fully cut it. It's a start but he needs to perform more selfless deeds. He'll also have to display august valor out there because I absolutely refuse to pair Eowyn up with a craven. All in all, it's an appealing pairing but some furnishing is in order. I'm not saying mold Grima into a little teddy bear inside. Good Lord, no. Simply add a pinch of integrity into his personae. It can be done. ...Just don't overdo it.) EowynXBoromir (Oh, shoot me. They'd be so cute together and Eowyn definitely has what it takes to make him into a better man--one who can resist the Ring this time. Just because he's dead doesn't mean we can't bring him back to life or play around a bit with AU... ;) ) Lords of Avalon series KerriganXSeren (You cannot deny this irrefutably awesome pairing; they were meant to be. It may be canon but it's one of the very few canon pairings I will support tenaciously.) GarafynXElaine (Those two bicker like an odd couple it's hilarious. They really ought to be together in my not-so-humble opinion.) VarianXMerewyn (They are so perfect and right for each other, they suit each other just like Kerrigan and Seren.) BlaiseXOC (Blaise needs a girl! He's so hilarious and caring that he needs somebody to love!) Charmed LeoXPiper (An evident duh. I don't have to explain this one) ColeXPhoebe (They were so perfect together! Coop/Cupe--however you spell is name--was okay but no one can top Cole! He never should have been vanquished, he should have been with her forever just like with Leo and Piper.) KyleXPaige (Remember Agent Brody? The one who was killed by one of the Avatars? Yeah, in my eyes, he was the one for Paige. As you can see, Season 8 displeased me with the pairings for Paige and Pheobe. Kyle was great, why did they have to kill him off? He was brought back as a white-lighter, he and Paige definitely still could have been together.) ChrisXBillie (My favorite characters besides Cole! They really would be awesome and so kick-arse together. My only question is why there hasn't been many pairings of these two but then again, in the view of some, it's rather unusual. All the better for me, I say. XD) Head in the Clouds GuyXGilda (They really seemed great for each other, I'll admit. Guy completely loved her and in her heart, Gilda loved him back, even though she never truly expressed it in the way he did or all the time but there definitely was love there.) FransXGilda (I'm sorry people but Frans was just so sweet and endearing to her that it's a heartbreaker that she told him she didn't love him back--and he was risking his life in going back to her! I know Gilda and Guy are suppose to be together yet this pairing wins me over a bit more. I hold a special spot for Frans; he was a really nice guy despite the fact he was a Nazi/German officer.) GuyXMia (They really would have been cute together if she hadn't died or Guy would have fallen in love with her as deeply as he was for Gilda.) The Big Bang Theory LeonardXPenny (For the love of God people this should be so obvious! Leonard is so totally into Penny and Penny definitely prefers him over Sheldon! Plus, Sheldon isn't the type of guy to engage in such relationships--he did say he'll be repulsed by them in one episode--and he drives Penny crazy half the time. Penny and Leonard just make more sense, they have gone out together once and seem to be well-suited for each other. Have I made my point or do I need to go into further detail about how irrational and ridiculous SheldonXPenny is?) SheldonXAmy (The best asexual couple ever. Honestly, their "romance" brings tears of humor to my eyes; they are so adorable at times!) HowardXBernadette (Howard is a lucky man to have found and landed Bernadette. Despite their trip-ups here and there, they really are quite cute and right for each other.) Leverage EliotXParker (These two would make such an awesome, adorable pair! They would do a great job in balancing their different personalities out.) NathanXSophie (It's so freakin' obvious it's not even funny. You'd have to be bloody blind not to notice the chemistry brewing between those two.) Bones BoothXCam (Hey, I thought they were cute together when they were going out. Then stupid Epps came along and ruined their relationship--glad he's rotting six feet under. Don't get me wrong, I like Booth/Brennen as well but I am also a shipper of this pairing all the way.) BoothXBrennen (What did I tell you? I see the logic in this pairing, they are quite hilarious in their awkward moments together.) SullyXBrennen (These two were so perfect together, I actually perferred this over Booth/Brennen--yeah, go ahead and just try to shoot me for that. It was really frustrating when he had to leave...as if they were really going to let Bones go with him on his boat!) HodginsXAngela (Why did they have to break up? Warum? Warum? Although I hear rumors that this might not be over just yet!) SweetsXDaisy (This two are so cute together that I reckon I'll get cavites from them.) SweetsXOC (Like my good friend lockheedelektra stated in her bio, I wouldn't mind seeing him paired up with someone else.) ZachXOC (Because Zach is just a can of awesome-ness. This can be pulled off, it just won't be easy.) WendellXOC (Like Zach, Wendell kicks arse. Gotta love him. He too deserves a honey to love.) The Phantom of the Opera ErikXMeg (This couple is for the WIN! Christine has her fop, Meg deserves some love and the Phantom is just the person who can do that. We need more Erik/Meg love--spread this shipping around, folks!) A Song of Ice and Fire EddardXCatelyn (From an arranged marriage, I loved how these two grew and cultivated their marriage and love for each other. I really don't think Ned cheated on Cate--I support the Lyanna/Rhaegor theory. Also, even though Ned dies, Cate still has the strength to carry on and fight for her children. Her love for Eddard lives on, which goes to show true love is eternal.) Littlefinger/Petyr BaelishXCatelyn (I TyrionXCatelyn (After all that has happned to Catelyn, I think it would be quite intriguing to see two people who were enemies from the start to bond together over a similar common goal. Tyrion won't be her foe anymore--unless she bears her grudge against all Lannisters, which would cause some problems. Still, I think these two have plenty to learn about each other and can help the other battle their inner demons.) TywinXCatelyn (I love reading all the fanfics about Catelyn surviving the Red Wedding and being forced to marry Tywin in order to save her family and the rest of the North. While I cannot ever seeing them loving each other truly like they did with their first spouses, I can see them over time gaining respect for each other.) StannisXCatelyn (Honestly, after reading several fanfics with Stannis in them, the more I feel sorrier for him as being the brother no one cared about or always took for granted. And out all of the main women in the series, Catelyn is the best woman suited. She can address his inner resentments towards his brothers and all the slights people has done against him. Also, I do enjoy those fanfics when they were younger. I think when written properly, this pairing can grow and flourish in its own special, unique way.) GendryXArya (Hahahaha! They are pretty adorable nd hilarious together! He is pretty calm and fine with her fighting with a sword and all.) EdricXArya (They were so cute together in the books and they seem together to get along swimmingly. I can see much potential in them when they get older. Much older.) JaimeXBrienne (My God, the sexual tension! They bicker like an old couple! Clearly, Brienne is a better choice for him, she's just the type of girl he needs. So far, he already respects her, which is a good start. Plus, he's warming up to her. So, move over, Cersei! Brienne is taking over!) Khal DrogoXDaenerys (I fell in love with this pairing the first time I read about them. For a barbarian leader, he was so sweet, kind, and attentive to Dany, more than one would expect. Like with Cate and Ned, Drogo will always beat inside Dany's heart.) JorahXDaenerys (Albeit things have gone downhill with Jorah, I still cling to some sliver of hope that maybe, just maybe, Dany will forgive him and Jorah will win her love. Somehow.) RhaegarXLyanna (Yeah, I support the theory that these two are the real parents of Jon Snow. Even though we don't much about these people, I have a strong feeling they had an epic, tender and yet tragic romance. It wouldn't be perfect but I do have a feeling they did love each other and were able to relate being trapped in a loveless marriage.) RobbXJeyne (Robb was just doing the right and honorable thing... They would have been great together if it weren't for those blasted Freys, Boltons, Lannisters, etc.) RobbXMycrella (Slightly AU by making Myrcella a few years older but I love all the concepts many fanfic writers have created to put this two together. I love both characterizations of these two and with Myrcella, Robb's chances of survival just increased. Plus, this two would have been so adorable together.) RobbXpotential Freys like Roslin, Fair Walda, Arwyn, etc (I always wondered what would have happened if Robb did marry one of Lord Frey's daughters and I am pleasantly surprised to see other possibilities besides Roslin.) SandorXSansa (How could I forget them? I love Sandor to pieces, he is just BAMF to die. And Sansa, well, they share something special together, believe it or not. I definitely think it could work; he does seem to care enough about Sansa's well-being, despite all the threats he utters. As for Sansa, I have feeling she cares for him as well.) WillasXSansa (This is my alternative for Sansa. He definitely has the character of the man Sansa always dreamed of marrying and he would be a good husband to her.) DavosXOsha (...This one came out of nowhere. I don't know why, but I can imagine this flaring up when Davos looks for Rickon in hopes to protect him.) JonXYgritte (These two like it smoldering and sexy! I was surprised all the times they went at each other like rabbits. Albeit, it was sad what happened to her; poor Jon had to feel the pain of losing a lover/mate or whatever they were.) GregorXCersei (Yes, go ahead and laugh. Someone in one ASOIAF forum mentioned that every time Cersei asks Gregor for something or needs someone to help her out in a situation, he stops in the middle with whatever he's doing and rides all the way back to King's Landing to answer her. Seriously, I wonder if he has a secret crush on her. Of course, that could be too much reading into his actions and he could just love all the bloodshed Cersei's demands brings him and equates her to giving him access to violence but you never know, he could obsess over her or be smitten by Cersei just for that. Gregor's mind is a mystery to us.) Once Upon A Time Mr. Gold/RumpelstiltskinXEmma (Yes, I know what some of you are thinking. But I adore Gold/Rumpel so much, the actor who plays him is awesome and the characters are brilliant. Emma is pretty BAMF and it has to be the part of me that loves Grima/Eowyn because my mind immediately put them together at the end of episode 1. This pairing has the potentiality to be dark and full of depth and those type of pairings intrigue me so much.) ArchieXEmma (Someone on an OUAT forum said conscience without will is weak and will without conscience is destructive, forceful. Archie is conscience and Emma is will and even though their personalities are different, I can see them becoming close friends or more than that. Opposites can attract, after all. Besides, Emma has had it rough all her life and Archie is just the type of guy who would never hurt her.) GrahamXEmma (Okay, after episode 7, I started to like this pairing. It was interesting, I'm not going to lie. But Gold/Emma is still my no. 1 favorite--just saying.) JeffersonXEmma (Less than normal pairings are always more intriguing and fascinating and for some reason, I was getting mad chemistry vibe between. At least they can bond over on being parents and the struggles they face!) Killian Jones/Captain HookXEmma (OH MY WORD! All that bloody sexual tension and chemistry! If they are not going to give me Gold x Emma or Jefferson x Emma, then they should at least give me Hook x Emma. If the creators of OUAT do that for me, I will be completely satisfied. As long as Neal doesn't butt in, I'll be content. That's all I'm asking really. They just have so many parallels and similarities that make me wonder what on earth are the writers up to and if they are hinting at anything.) James/DavidXSnow White/Mary (Ah, they are so meant to be. Enough said.) Thomas/SeanXCinderella/Ashley (I'm so glad in the modern verse, they're getting a second chance. Plus, they make a cute side couple.) GrahamXRuby/Red Ridding Hood (The Hunter and Little Red Riding Hood. After all, she did say her wolf charm brought her luck and we all know Graham is one with the wolves.) FrankensteinXRed (I like the concept of this pairing. It's something I wouldn't have expected and that's why I like it.) RumpelstiltskinXCora (I never thought this would happen but it did. I find someone else to ship with Rumpel besides Emma. After watching "The Miller's Daughter" episode, I got the ship feels. BADLY. Honestly, I just loved the chemistry between them. Just like with Emma, Cora doesn't annoy me with Rumpel because it just works. Belle just irks me when she keeps on going on her ultra Lawful Good campaign in changing Rumpelstiltskin--which I think she sends a bad message to young girls. Just stay by your man long enough and he'll turn good for you! Nope, not going to happen, especially in the real world. Hence, I ship him with Emma and Cora, they understand him better (in my opinion) and also know you can't be squeaky clean or do "good" things all the time. Plus, I had issues with the entire episode of "Skin Deep" and the Rumbelle relationship.) Stargate SG1 Jack O'NeillXSam Carter (This is so canon and I was so hoping this two would get together. Sadly, this pairing will never happen, despite all the hints dropped in the entire franchise, because it's not cancelled. Anyway, I just loved their interactions together and how much they complement the other. They are so endearing together!) DanielXVala (Haha, these two together make me laugh quite often! There is so much (sexual) tension between that I just love it! The last episode Unending was a nice treat, albeit time then got erased so they didn't remember being in a relationship. Why didn't they write it down so their past selves could learn about their romantic relationship and in return, learn more about the other? Like with Jack and Sam, I like to refer to this pairing as canon as well.) Van Helsing Roleplays: Van Helsing RPG: Separate Scenes and Seperate Scenes II: Blood Legacy EgilXCatherine (After a little discussion with Celtic Aurora I decided to put this fabulous pairing on my profile even though it's a part of a Van Helsing RPG but it's still remotely related to Van Helsing. Egil is my character while Catherine belongs to Celtic Aurora. Info about this particular RPG can be found here: http://www.fanfiction.ws/topic/25195/1599994/1/. PM or e-mail us if you want for information about our characters.) RolfXSatine (In their sorrow, they found each other. It's a cute pairing. Rolf is mine while Satine belongs to Trinity Le Faye.) ArnaudXGabriele (They are so soulmatesm, both of them have been unlucky in love and Arnaud really treats Gabriele right. Arnaud is vamplady's and Gabi's mine. Nuff said.) ErikXShaelyn (Okay, so Erik the Phantom isn't mine but I play as him! And Shaelyn is Celtic Aurora's character.) MorfranXAlexandra (Morfran is my dark, brooding assassin and his werewolf warrior of a princess belongs to Celtic Aurora.) Van Helsing RPG: The Dawn RolfXNickelia (Haha, I present you another Van Helsing RPG pairing! Rolf belongs to me while Celtic Aurora rightfully owns Nickelia. I seem to be supplying the males in every pairing...heh, oh well. -smirks- Info about this RPG here: http://www.fanfiction.ws/topic/25195/3821404/1/. PM or e-mail us if you want for information about our characters.) KalanXSigrid (Again, Sigrid is mine and Kalan belongs to The-Sapphire-Pheonix. A bad boy with an anti-heroine/sort of good girl. XD) EgilXIllenka (Ah, both of them have scars for each other to heal. They know how to be there for each other. Egil-me, Illenka-vamplady101.) AlanaXThanatos (Who said evil can't love? These two sure do! Thanatos is my darling necromancer while Alana is Celtic Aurora's.) EdwardXCatherine (At long last, they are together! Those two are so endearing, you can feel the love radiating off them. Edward is mine while Catherine, as you know it, is Celtic Aurora's.) Van Helsing RPG: Dawn Revolution MichaelXIsolade (They'll be so adorable together, both are quite outgoing and are unique hybrids. Michael just needs to watch out for meddlesome, licentious Xavier. Michael belongs to Celtic Aurora while I am the owner of Isolade.) KonstantinXSigridXKalan (Kalan refuses to let her go, his love for Sigrid is just too strong. Now, Sigrid is perfectly content with her new husband but the war can create some rifts and issues along the way... You know who owns Kalan and Sigrid but the ever so dashing and attractive Konstantin is property of vamplady101.) CinaedXLucy (What happens when you put a wrathful, bitter priest who hates all vampires and whatnot and a leader of vampire coven together? Well, trouble, of course. But after some heavy battling, it'll be quite intriguing to see how these two come together at last. Cinaed is all mine while Lucy is property of Celtic Aurora.) KolyaXBronwyn (This one will be a love of many struggles. Honestly, when Kyola's of the working class and Bronwyn's of the higher ends of society, you really can't expect their relationship to be rosy and full of rainbows and butterflies, right? Plus, it's funner this way. There'll be a lot of going back and forth--like the 2004 film of "North and South" for those who've seen it--but in the end, all will be well. Kyola belongs to vamplady101 and I am the owner of Bronwyn.) DavidXThora (We have found David's female counterpart! Two peas in a pod, two birds of a feather...I could go on. Hehe, it's going to quite an entertainment to bring these two philanders together! David is all mine and Thora is property of vamplady101.) WillXValeska (This is going to be one interesting couple! While Will is trying to keep Sebastian and Daciana apart, Valeska is going eventually get out of her shell and tell him off. Of course, somehow, some way, they'll eventually fall in love. Will belongs to The-Sapphire-Phoenix and Valeska is mine.) EphidelXGabriella (Hah, this is perfect example of irony for you kiddies! From a prank gone wrong, these two will end up falling head over heels in love with each other! Hilarous, ja? Ephidel is all mine while Gabriella is owned by Celtic Aurora.) YakimXTatiana (Here's another lovely example of opposites attract! Tati is sweet and innocent one while Yakim is rough-around-the-edges, severe, and a tad bit tempermental. Yakim belongs to me and Tatiana is the property of vamplady101.) OscarXChelsea (Because Oscar needs a girl to loosen him up. Trust me. ;D Oscar is my property while Celtic Aurora owns Chelsea.) WolfgangXMarisol (Word has it that Rolf's lusty older brother wants in on the fun and love--that's true. If David can find someone to love, why not him as well? And Marisol is the perfect woman for the job, she can keep him in line. Wolfgang belongs to me and Marisol is all Celtic Aurora's.) AdrianXLeocadia (Here, we have two artists--one with paint, the other with music. Adrian is just the man to curb Leocadia's suspicion of men. Adrian is property of Celtic Aurora and I own Leocadia.) WilliamXVigdis (With a creepy, crazy priest obsessing all over her, Vigdis does need a normal guy who'll treat her right. Plus, they're like poalr opposities and yet, they'll make it work. William Van Helsing belongs to Celtic Aurora while Vigdis is all mine.) ArkadiXZahara (Let's just say Zahara's guardian/god won't be pleased... I own Arkadi and Zahara is owned by vamplady101.) LunexaXJuliusXDulce (Finally we have ourselves another love triangle! We haven't had a new one in ages! Lunexa is property of The-Sahpire-Phoenix, I own Julius--sort of--, and vamplady101 has the ownership of Dulce.) Van Helsing Roleplay: The Vampire League: The Next Generation KeiranXTinuviel (Ah, one of those classical friendships where both buddies dig each other but are too afraid to confess their love because they don't think the love will be recipricated and Keiran doesn't want to become his father and hurt Tinuviel. But they'll make it through... Keiran belongs to Celtic Aurora while Tinuviel is all mine.) HieronymusXGabriella (Aren't they just simply darling? When you have a rake winning the heart of Van Helsing's daughter and falling in love in the process as well, there's bound to be some action involved. I own Heironymus and Celtic Aurora stakes claims on Gabriella.) GarethXBerthe (I must say, this is cuteness with a capital C! And they prove that ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony. Gareth-mine, Berthe-vamplady101.) EthanXAliria (Haha, two little flirts for each other! Definite soulmates I tell you, they're the humor and life of the party. Casanova Ethan belongs to me and Aliria is owned by Celtic Aurora.) CorvinXLivia (A demon and assassin--who could ask for more? They have alike minds, I tell you. Livia is property of Celtic Aurora and Corvin is mine.) DanteXFleur (At first there's a little explosion of the opposites but then they attract! Fleur, in the end, can't resist her future man. Dante-Celtic Aurora, Fleur-me.) AbrahamXAureliaXAce (It's the Triple A pairing! Who will she chose? Will it be her childhood, bookworm compaion, Abraham or the mysterious, alluring, and chaming Ace? Dun, dun, dun! Abraham and Ace are owned via vamplady101 and Aurelia belongs to me.) DavidXCordelia (Finally, my renowned womanizer has his eyes set on a girl! The sister of the man who, er, violated his second cousin Danica but Cordelia isn't exactly on best terms with her older brother Werner. But this is going to be an interesting couple for sure. She's cool and withdrawn while he's utterly charming and sociable. David-me, Cordelia-vamplady101.) HectorXMarisol (Both have felt the sting of love and therefore, it's them who will mend the cracks in each other's heats. They're pretty bitter and jaded--just like Celtic Aurora said--about love so they can certainly cross that path towards romance together. Hector is mine while Celtic Aurora owns Marisol.) CiaranXDanica (Well, Danica's Love Square is pretty huge so I decided to divide them up. This two are really adorable together, he really knows how to make her feel well and stir some passion into her despite all she's been through and will soon undergo. You can really feel the chemistry vibe from them. Ciaran-vamplady101 and Danica-me.) NapoleonXDanica (They've been childhood friends since the very beginning and for a few years have been smitten towards each other. Their feelings have been growing but Danica isn't sure who she loves more... Both characters are mine.) WernerXDanica (Pretty much the darkest, most twisted pairing out there. They loathe each other guts but must marry under some special circumstances. Of course, Werner doesn't care if she's off with his best pal Ciaran or Napoleon for that matter but times might change and he could come, should we say, darkly possessive. Werner is property of vamplady101 and you know Danica is mine.) More later... Stories Already Out BLOOD, MOON, AND WAR- Deleted Son of the Devil, Meet the Daughter of Your Enemy- Complete (I made a character theme video for this story. If you have the time and are intrigued, check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pSSoWLiqnc) REQUIEMS- Complete Wild Justice- Complete (once titled Justice and Revenge.) Till Death Due Us Apart- Complete Bringing Back What's Dead- Complete (sequel to Till Death Due Us Apart) Clandestine Coalesce- Complete (Received First Place in Elli Cole's challenge) You Are Mine, Forever Mine- Complete Five Sensations For You- Complete My Damned Soul Needs Fire, My Damsel Breaths Fire- Complete The Beauty of Us Two- Complete Ace in the Hole- In progress (sequel to Celtic Aurora's Dark Ripples in Blood) Stop And Say You Love Me- Complete Her Secret Santas- Complete Experimental Value- Complete To End a Life- Complete They Fight Crime!- Complete VOLLMOND- Complete What's Hidden Behind the Dream- Complete 'Tis the Season of Giving- Complete Mein Rasend Herz- Complete When a Broken Heart Cries- Complete Never Was and Never Will Be- Complete I Instantly Believe You- Complete Romancing the Sakura- Complete C2s... Manger of: Star-Crossed Passion Category: Fire Emblem Description: Exotic or rare pairings featuring in any of the FE games. A place where action and adventure is always around and love affects all, including the villains, anti-heroes, and so forth. Can include slash, yuri, or yaoi. Notes: This C2 was born after seeing a few Naruto C2s featuring rare, non-canon, or 'crack' pairings hence, I opt the notion for Fire Emblem to have one of those. Heh, you might want to check it out if you're interested in a different variety of pairings that you really don't see on a daily, regular basis. (If you would like to join, just PM me.) Staff of: Sakura Harem Category: Naruto Description: A community where Sakura is loved by any number of men, whoever they may be. Only Sakura centered stories and no Yuri, please. Crack welcomed. Staff welcomed. Staff of: HARU no SAKURA: The Spring of the Cherry Blossom Category: Naruto Description: This long-awaited C2 focuses on stories whose main character is Sakura Haruno: kunoichi, Leaf ninja, medic-in-training, and apprentice to the Fifth Hokage; whether she stars in a tiny drabble, a short story, or an epic adventure. This community contains only the best of decent and/or high quality writing (this includes grammar, character and plot development), which will be observed by the manager and/or staff prior to posting. Het and Yuri pairings are accepted. Upcoming Stories Naruto: The Tale of the Snake Lord and His Lady Summary: AU Dismayed by their daughter’s reluctance to wed, King Jiraiya and Queen Tsunade lock Sakura up in a tower so only “the bravest” can marry her. Taking matters into her own hands, headstrong Sakura escapes and pursues a life far from the palace walls…leading straight into the home of her parents’ greatest foe, Orochimaru. (SakuraxOrochimaru) Van Helsing: Blood By Three Summary: Verona, Marishka, and Aleera. We mostly know them as the three brides of the notorious Count Dracula. What were these three ladies like before Dracula entered their lives and transformed them into of living dead? Three very different brides, three extremely different backgrounds. Threeshot. Main Pairings: DraculaXBrides Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones: A Daughter’s Love Summary: As Selena’s daughter, life can be quite perplexing and cumbersome for Rowan, who never truly knew her father. Growing up in a healing and convoluted land she is endlessly faced with scathing comments of her father, her mother, and their “scandalous” relationship. Her world completely turns upside down when her mother is asked to join an upcoming war in which leads to outright refusal and the deadly consequences to come. After witnessing her mother subconsciously experiences her father’s death once more, Rowan decides to take matters into her hands. Her plan ends up becoming larger than life when she steps into a time portal and is thrust into the time where her mother, Selena, and her enigmatic father first met. Will Rowan’s appearance save her parents’ love or will her meddling be the indirect factor of its demise? (SelenaxValter) -Potential Sequel (not 100 percent sure, depends on how the story ends)- Minor Pairings: CaellachXAmelia (You should have seen that one coming) Just Like Them Summary: He was burdened by family duties, forced to bend and shape himself to their expectations and desires. Living in terrible conditions she joins a gang that pressures her to commit unspeakable acts. People tried to mold them as they envisioned but now, enough is enough. Valter runs away from home and joins the Grado Imperial Army to live out his own life while Selena defects from the gang and trains herself to be a formidable mage knight. (Valter and Selena centric) -Sequel: Just Like You- Main Pairings: Slight ValterXSelena Stranded Summary: Valter and Selena have never been on good terms. The secluded friction between them is overwhelming, nearly suffocating. So what will happen when these two generals are not only paired up together on a mission but also become stranded on island in beginning of their sea voyage? Will both of them get out alive? (SelenaxValter) Beauty and the Beast Summary: We all know the story of Beauty and the Beast. Beast falls in love with Beauty, Beast lets Beauty go, Beauty almost loses Beast, Beauty confesses her love to Beast, he changes, and they live happily ever after. Yet what if, instead of the Beast falling for Beauty first, it was the other way around? (SelenaxValter) The Black Desert Rose Summary: AU “Pick a black, don’t come back.” They didn’t realize that black roses are cursed. Roses in the desert, especially black ones, were scant and they merely desired a souvenir. However, once they plucked the two roses from the sand their fate was sealed. (ValterxSelena, CaellachxAmelia) The Patriot: Love is War Summary: (For Celtic Aurora’s 100 Themes Challenge) No one would expect a man like him to fall for a simple American farm girl. No one would expect her to return the gesture. (TavingtonxMargaret) Van Helsing: Forgive Me, Father, For I Have Sinned Summary: Ethel, it appears, to have ‘sinned’ numerously. The Church demands for her repentance, her family is ashamed, and the whole town is plotting against her–all because she carries the child of a man who is despised through out the world. The problem is…who’s the father? (Van HelsingxOCxDracula) Lords of Avalon: Hole In the Earth Summary: Camelot reeks of malice, treachery, and evil. The Lords of Avalon are desperately fighting off Morgan and her horde while the two parties relentlessly search for the thirteen sacred objects. So where do four teenagers from the 21st century fit into this picture? A/N: Title is still under construction--maybe. CharmedXKing Kong: Triumph and Agony Summary: A tumultuous uprising of demons forces Billie to take Chris and flee the Manor, only to trip into a time portal that takes the two in the Great Depression, in the heart of New York City. There, she meets rough-and-ready Captain Englehorn and embarks on a treacherous journey rife with gigantic and demonic perils. (EnglehornxBillie) Skyrim: I Did Not Sign Up For This Summary: If Revan Zahara Onasi knew that leaving if her house would entail her to get lost, captured by the Imperial Legion, almost be executed, then have a dragon save her ass by nearly frying her to death, and enlist the help of sympathetic Imperial soldier only to be then hailed as the last of the Dragonborns, a savior to mankind, then she would have stayed home. “Honestly, all I wanted was to buy some goddamned milk!” Parody. Fable: Where Innocence is Burned Summary: She was no Sparrow. Sparrows were such feeble, fragile creatures, so easily crushed. Her sister’s death and her fall taught her that much. She would never be weak ever again. Dark humor. A/N: Title might be under construction. A Million Mile From Home Summary: All Princess Reagan/Cersei wanted to do was to support and make love to her brother. Apparently, Fate had other plans because Walter, this strange hooded woman, and almost everyone else seemed to think she was a Hero and had to lead a bloody revolution against Logan. Good luck to them. Slight dark humor. Main Pairings: LoganxPrincess A/N: Title might be under construction. Collecting Debts Summary: The people who swore to obey and follow their Hero betrayed her in the worst possible way. They murdered her brother–against her royal decree! So the new Queen would make them suffer, one by one, for killing the only person she ever loved. Hints of Logan/Princess. Once Upon a Time: Swan Lake Summary: AU The curse has been broken but something sinister is on the rise, threatening both Regina’s and Cora’s power. This new evil has taken an interest in Emma Swan, for he believes their destinies are forever intertwined. Main Pairings: Mad Hatter/JeffersonxEmma, /RumpelstiltskinxEmma, Captain Hook/Kilian JonesxEmma Minor Pairings: CharmingxSnow White, AugustxBelle, RubyxDr. Whale, RumpelstiltskinxCora and more to come... Haunting Ground: To Taste the Forbidden Truth Summary: After trying to adjust to her old life, Fiona Belli realizes she has changed forever and things just can’t go back to way they were. Her recurrent nightmares, sudden fascination with science, alchemy, and the importance of her Azoth prompts her to go back to the castle in search of more clues and information about Lorenzo’s research. Yet, just when she is near the cusp of knowledge and beginning to understand it all, the nightmare begins once more. Main Pairings: RiccardoxFionaxYLorenzo A/N: Title might be under construction. More are coming soon but I'm procrastinating in establishing the summaries of the rest of the future stories (there are too many ideas to post all at once so I'm being finicky in which ones I write first) up here. Fan Art Ace In the Hole Poster by Celtic Aurora: http:///art/Ace-in-the-Hole-Banner-127454942 For my readers of the Underworld fic, Ace in the Hole, I have posted up some of my featured OCs who will be starring in the story so you know that they look like. Thanatos: http:///serve/252/97971.jpg Ukon: http:///pictures/d/1035-1/TakeshiKaneshiroinHouseofFlyingDaggerswithsword.jpg Clarissa: http:///1084/861641843_8812d08b53.jpg Edward: http:///2007/08/matt_damon.jpg Jacob: http:///images/predrag-bjelac-02.jpg Blanca: http:///films_movies_actors/film_images/Catherine_Zeta_Jones_red_dress.jpg Magna: http:///2013/01/betty-white.jpg?w=625 Bristol: http:///image/Holly20Marie20Combs/charmedfansbe/charmed2/holly-marie-combs-1024x768-16496.jpg Zael: http:///ew/i/2012/10/16/once-upon-time-morrisongallery.jpg Van Helsing Challenge Rules: 1. You must select at least one of the pairings below. 2. Your fanfic also must commence with one of the beginning phrases. 3. The themes aren’t mandatory; they are only there if you need something to induce the creative juices to flow or desire more of a challenge. If you decided to have one of the themes, mention it either in the summary, in the nascence or end of the story. 4. Oneshots, two-shots, and three-shots are accepted. Multi-chapter fics, drabbles, and poems are not. Unless you think you can finish a multi-chapter story before the deadline, then go right ahead. Pairings: Velkan x Marishka Velkan x Verona Van Helsing x Verona Van Helsing x Anna Van Helsing x Marishka Carl x Anna Carl x Verona Carl x Marishka Dracula x Brides Dracula x Verona Dracula x Marishka Verona x Dracula x Marishka Jinette x Aleera (*in Jack Sparrow’s voice* I couldn’t resist, mate.) Beginning Phrases: a. This couldn’t be real. It was all just an illusion. b. Sometimes, all it took was one simple drink to change everything. c. Out of all the sins he had committed, there was one sin that he refused to repent for. d. It had only been a simple, little, harmless mistake. Now, she/he was going to pay for it. e. She/He was living a lie. And he/she wanted out. f. Night had fallen. It was time for the hunt. Themes (optional): 1. Schadenfreude 2. Redemption 3. Forgiveness 4. Concupiscence 5. Freedom 6. Power 7. Frailty 8. Obsession 9. Kismet 10. Misconception 11. Guilt 12. Defiance Deadline: None at the moment. Just keep on entering! Prizes: 1st place: A video 2nd place: An oneshot 3rd place: A drabble A/N: If you have any further questions regarding to the challenge, please send me a PM and I’ll respond as soon as possible. And when you're done with your challenge fic, let me know. Entries: Sometimes, All It Takes by GuenVanHelsing My Girls by EvilIncarnateForever Changing Sides by PrinceCaspiansKhaleesi Ich bin die fesche Lola (They Call Me Naughty Lola)- Marlene Dietrich Ich bin die fesche Lola, Ich bin die fesche Lola, Lola, Lola! Ich bin die fesche Lola – They call me Naughty Lola, They call me Naughty Lola, Lola, Lola! They call me Naughty Lola – |
Community: | Star Crossed Passion |
Focus: | Games Fire Emblem |