![]() Author has written 8 stories for Harry Potter. I guess I should update this. I now live in Spokane, WA. My name is Michael and I live in Alaska. Have been a huge Harry Potter fan since I saw the first movie. I went out and bought the first 5 books and read them within a week. I was so disappointed when Half Blood Prince and Deathly Hallows came out and they lacked the same quality that the first 5 books had. JKR kept killing off all the good guys and for no particular reason. There was absolutely no reason to kill Hedwig, Fred, Remus, Tonks...etc. , except to make Harry suffer. I know it was war, but come on. Just too many good guy deaths and then all the Malfoys live. what the hell. And I will never understand why JKR had Harry and Ginny getting together. That made no sense whatsoever. It is a fact that guys end up with the woman most like their mother. NOT the girl who looks like their mother. that is just wrong. (shudder). For 5 years, Hermione and Harry were never apart. She was the first girl to give him a hug and the first to give him a kiss. Then all of a sudden she is interested in the guy that yells and argues with her and has not the slightest interest in anything she cares about. And is ignoring Harry, her very first friend, because of a book?? And the idea that Harry would get jealous for the girl that said maybe 5 sentences to him in the first 5 years. First off, Harry never got jealous. It wasn't allowed and was beaten out of him from an early age by the Dursleys. The only thing that makes sense would be Love potions. I also don't like pussy or dumb Harry. Come on let's get real. In DH, Harry is still throwing Disarming spells at people trying to kill him. Did he not learn a single thing from the fight in the Ministry. Come on now, he should have been tossing around a few "Reducto's" at the DE's. And before people think this is murder, it isn't. They are in a WAR, which makes Harry and friends, Soldiers. The first rule of war is Soldiers kill or disable or you are killed. In the first book, the sorting hat wanted to put him in the house known for being cunning and ambitious. But then throughout the rest of the series, Harry shows no ambition and little cunning. He is often seen not thinking before reacting to something. In the last 2 books, especially after learning the prophecy, I felt that Harry needed to adopt the philosophy of "A dead Death Eater is not going to be able to come back and hurt you later" and learn to use his brain. Harry does neither. If you want to read about a smart Harry, I would suggest the "Open your eyes" series by Mathiasgranger. Very good stories. I also love stories where Harry kicks ass and takes no prisoners. Reptilia28's "Light's Hope, Death Hunters" is an excellent story where Harry and Hermione do both. I was so glad to find Fanfiction. I love the stories on here. I don't have the talent to write really good stories, but I do enjoy reading them and there are a lot of fabulous writers on here. The Ships that I really like are Harry/Hermione of course. I also love Harry and Daphne Greengrass (this has now become my favorite), Susan Bones, Luna Lovegood, and Padma Patil(not Parvati though). I find that Harry is best suited for the most intellegent women. And Harry/multi pairings is always a good read. NEVER EVER Ron/Hermione. If Hermione isn't with Harry, I think it would make more sense for her to be with someone older and more mature. Cedric, Viktor, Redeemed Percy...etc. Ron with Hermione has got to be one of the most idiotic pairings, ever. There are some good stories where Dumbledore, Ron and Ginny get a good bashing. An excellent story of this is "Harry Potter and the Manipulator of Destiny" by Wheezy1. Or "Harry Potter and the Champion's Champion" by Driftwood1965. This is by far the ultimate Ron bashing story. Be prepared to snort, giggle, guffaw and fall out of your chair laughing. On the other end of the spectrum, I also enjoy Good Dumbledore stories. I think the best one I have read so far is "Harry Potter: Dark Memories" by Blueowl Interesting point. When I read a story of Good Dumbledore, I find myself picturing the Richard Harris portrayal of Dumbledore from the first 2 movies. (He was so good as Dumbledore). When he is The Manipulative Old Bastard Dumbledore, my mind goes to the Michael Gambon character from movies 3-6.
Favorite Quotes “Because you are an immoveable object, and my life is an overwhelming force,” he said, his eyes clear. “I’ll wash over anyone else.” (Harry Potter to Daphne Greengrass in "Perfect Situations" by Jeconais on ) We learnt a long time ago that while some people might follow Voldemort, and some might follow Dumbledore, the only way to actually succeed would be to follow Harry.” Fred Weasley "Matryoshka Vignettes" by Jeconais On "I'll be twelve in less than three weeks." "Oh good, that will make all the difference, let's wait and tell him then!" Harry & Hermione "In this World and the Next" by Robst "Ron was a Dumbass" and "I don't care if he is the venerable pope; He annoys the shit out of me" Harry about Ron in "The Power" by DarthBill "And five fucking thousand points from Ravenclaw!" "The Merging" by Shaydrall Master Peppertale, May your Gold always flow, your blood thirst be sated, your comments be more snarky, your scowls more scornful and your females more horny.” He’s Not Normal….Uncle Stojil The Good, The Bad and The Ugly Challenge. The ultimate showdown between 3 powerful wizards. This is my challenge to anyone that wants to take it up. The Characters: 1. Harry is powerful. Not Godlike, but still stronger than Dumbles and Voldy. Magical animagus, but keep special magical talents to a minimum. Let me know, if you want to do this, because I would love to read it. Common Spelling Errors If English is not your primary language (and there are a lot on Fanfiction), then it is very understandable that you may have trouble with some English words. There are a lot of words that sound the same, but have totally different meanings. (If English is your first language, then you have no excuses for poorly written stories, unless you are Dyslexic. ). Here are some common errors (I will add more as they pop up): Trial, not Trail. "Sirius's Trial was held in the Wizengamot". A Trail is a pathway through the woods. Their, not There or They're. "Their Trunks were at the foot of each bed.". Their is possessive, There is a direction. "He went over there." They're is another common mistake here. They're is two words and means "They are". "They're on Their way to Hogwarts over There." Wizard Money or "Harry's Rich" I keep reading a bunch of stories which use the ratio of 1 Galleon to 5 British pounds, because that is what JKR said in an interview once. Which in turn makes the Knut about 1 pence. However this ratio doesn't make sense to me. JKR has stated in interviews that she is not very good at math and keeping timelines straight. Canon is full of examples: In the first book, Harry buys some of everything off the snack cart for him and Ron. Enough that there is a huge pile of candy on the seat. He pays the cart lady 11 sickles and 7 Knuts. In 1991, the British pound to US dollar was about $1.90 to £1. Using the JKR ratio, that means Harry spent £3.26 or about $6.20 US. I don't think so. I don't know how much candy cost in the UK at that time, but here in the US it was about 50 cents a candy bar. Which makes more sense would be Knuts being worth 10 pence which would make the Galleon about £49 or just under a $100 US. Harry spending about £10 (or about $20 US) on Candy makes a little more sense. This would also make Harry a very rich young man, considering his vault had "Inside were mounds of gold coins. Columns of silver. Heaps of little bronze Knuts." (HP and Philosophers Stone) Mounds would suggest there were a lot of them, and at £49 per Galleon would suggest that Harry was a Millionaire at the very least. That is not even taking into account that it is often referred to as his "Trust" Vault, which would imply that it was set up from a larger family vault when he was born. Personally, I think the richer families set up vaults for their kids to teach them about finances until they reach a certain age. It isn't an allowance, so there is no annual money dump into the vault. But that is just speculation on my part. No matter how you look at it, Harry is a very rich boy. Another example would be their wands. Harry paid 7 Galleons for his. Considering that this is the most important tool a wizard has and the cores are probably not cheap, (Phoenix, Unicorn, Griffon, Dragon….etc. You can't exactly go out and pick them up at a local warehouse.) you can imagine that the actual cost is going to be high. It makes more since that a wand costs £343 and not £35. And the reason Ron has to use Charlies old Wand instead of getting a new one when he first goes to school. In the Second book, the Weasleys are able to buy all the school supplies for 5 kids with just a small pile of sickles and one Galleon. Everything was used, but they still got everything for 5 students. This also included full sets of the Lockhart books. We don't know how many Sickles there were, but I figure a small pile would be about 20 to 25 of them. What makes more sense? That they got everything for about £12 (about $23 US) or £90 (about $170 US)?? The best example i think would be the thousand Galleons Harry gave to the Twins. £5000 pounds would not have been enough to start a business, and open a shop in Diagon Alley. It takes a lot of money to start a business. You need to rent a building, buy ingredients for inventory, hiring employees and advertising. However, £49000 would have gone a long way in setting up shop in a Prime location in Diagon Alley. (Which couldn't be cheap since it was the main shopping center for Wizards in Britain) Even if you half the value of the Knut to 5 pence, then it still makes more sense than the 1 to 5 ratio. I found an article that I think explains Wizarding Money very well by Reddit. You can find it by googling Reddit and Wizard Money COMMON MISTAKES IN FANON THAT PISS ME OFF!! (this will be updated as I find more mistakes) (1)Harry receives his first Hogwarts letter on his birthday. The FIRST letter came a WEEK before his birthday. Hagrid hand delivered it to him on his birthday after Vernon destroyed a few thousand of them. (2)The first lesson in Charms was Wingardium Leviosa. That actually wasn't taught til HALLOWEEN. Two months after school started. (3)The Longbottoms were attacked the same night as the Potters. They were attacked THREE days after. Blueowl's story "Dark Memories" has them attacked before. While a great story and highly recommended, that always bothered me. The same argument for Sirius being arrested the same night. Same as Longbottoms, it took him a couple days to find Peter. HP Lexicon has him confronting Peter on Nov. 2nd. (4)The idea that many actually knew Remus was a Werewolf before the end of POA. Actually not many knew. It was a very well kept secret. It is why Snape assigned the homework and why he had to resign before the complaints came in. (5)The idea of Sirius being the Secret Keeper is known by all. Fudge admits that it isn't common knowledge to Rosmerta in POA. Also, the Potters had only been under the Fidelius for a week before Voldie came to visit. Peter probably told him right away, but Voldishorts is all about symbolism and making his final Horcrux on Halloween would be too ideal for him to pass by. He proved that he was a very patient villain when he waited 9 months to capture Harry for his resurrection ritual. (6)This whole idea that the Astronomy class is unimportant. It is actually very important in Potions, Herbology and Rituals. Do you actually think Voldemort waited a WHOLE year to kidnap Harry in 4th year for no reason? Come on. Moody/Crouch Jr. could have very easily lured Harry out of the castle and slapped a portkey on him or waited til he went to Hogsmeade to do it. Do you think it was just a coincidence that the week of the Summer Solstice was during the 3rd task? And folks it is "Astronomy, the Study of the Universe", NOT "Astrology" which would be part of divination and Tarot Cards, since that has to do with Horoscopes and stuff like that. Get it right people! (7)The idea that Hermione was still a stickler for following rules and authority in her later years. This is the girl that in first year set a Professor on Fire, helped sneak a dragon out of the school, and followed Harry past the traps in the 3rd floor. In Second year, she "stole" from a Professor, tricked another professor into giving her a pass to the restricted section of the library and brewed a highly illegal potion. 3rd year was rescuing Buckbeak and Sirius from the Ministry and let's not forget in 5th year she helped lead a rebellion against a professor and the ministry "recognized" Headmaster. And then tricked that same Woman into a confrontation with the Centaurs and broke into the Ministry. By the end of 5th year, this is no longer the girl in awe of authority and rules, she is more than willing to ignore those rules and authority figures that she feels don't deserve it. That was another reason I didn't like the 6th book, JKR seemed to regress Hermione's personality back to the beginning of 1st year. (8)The misconception that Lucius Malfoy had a seat on the Wizengamot. He does NOT have a seat, which is proven during Harry's trial in book 5. Lucius is told about the results from Fudge after the trial. Since it was a trial in front of the whole Wizengamot, he wouldn't have had to have Fudge explain it to him if he was there. He also explains to Harry and Arthur that it is none of their business what goes on between a Private Citizen and the Minister. He did have a seat on the Schools Governors Board, but was kicked off after 2nd year. (9)The idea that Vernon and Petunia starved Harry as frequent punishments before Hogwarts. In Canon, after the sorting, it clearly states that the Dursleys never starved Harry, but he didn't get as much, BECAUSE OF DUDLEY. Dudley would steal Harry's food after he was done with his own meal which Vernon and Petunia allowed. This only meant Harry learned to eat his meals very fast, before Dudley had a chance. It is only during the summer of second year that the rationing of food started after the incident with Dobby. During 3rd year and after, Harry suffered because of Dudley's diet, which Petunia forced everyone to abide by. This would also include the idea of physical abuse. JKR is from the UK and knows that they have some of the strictest Child abuse laws in the world. EVERY single person that deals with children is taught to look for signs of abuse and report it. The idea of Vernon and Petunia putting their "Normal" lifestyle in jeopardy is ludicrous. They put being "Normal" above ALL else and they weren't going to risk being arrested and seen as not normal no matter how much they despised Harry. This whole idea of Harry being a timid abused first year who flinches at the slightest movement because he was so severely physically abuse abused by Vernon and Petunia is ridiculous. Harry was anything but timid during the second chapter when the letters were coming. Are the Dursley's Despicable? YES. Was he mentally abused? yes. Was he neglected? most likely. However, the only physical stuff was from Dudley and his gang. And before people scream and say he was sleeping in a broom cupboard, I once read from an author (I don't remember who) that Harry himself probably crawled in there after being brought to the Dursley's. Here is a 15 month old baby who has been traumatized by watching his Mom and Dad being killed and is now living with total strangers. Strangers that don't seem to like him at all. The cupboard would be safe for him to hide in. It would have been just easier for Vernon and Petunia to just let him continue sleeping in there. (10)Authors that continue to mistakenly give FIRST and SECOND years more knowledge of spells than they are capable of. I keep running across stories that have someone from first year firing off stunning spells or even Reducto's. These are 4TH YEARS spells!! Unless it is a time traveling person, then they don't have the knowledge to perform those spells. I once read a story where Ron cast a Reducto spell at Harry and they hadn't even had their first lesson yet. I couldn't continue, because that told me that the author was an idiot. (11)The complete and utter myth that Potter men go for only Redheads which is usually the basis for most Harry/Ginny pairings. Charlus Potter married Dorea Black, who was BLONDE according to HP Wiki. Whether you believe Charlus and Dorea were James's Parents (which I do), that alone proves that not all Potter men are "cursed/blessed" to fall for Redheads. This would also make Harry and the Weasley's 3rd cousins. Dorea's 1st cousin was Cedrella Black who married Septimus Weasley. Arthur's parents. (12)Stating that Pettigrew is the betrayer in the Potters Will. Many Fanfics have Harry finally reading his parents will. This idea makes total sense to me, since they were in a war and a psychopath was after them. It would make perfect sense for them to leave a will to take care of their only child in case something happened. This is what responsible adults do.What bothers me is that people want to put in the clause, "If we are dead, then Peter Pettigrew betrayed us because he was the Secret Keeper". THAT MAKES NO SENSE WHATSOEVER!! If they thought Peter had the slightest chance of betraying them, then they would have NEVER made him the Secret Keeper. The whole point of the Fidelius charm was that you trusted the person keeping the secret completely. (13)The idea of a female Harry being the one in the prophecy. I know FemHarry seems to be popular, but if you are going to do a femHarry story you need to change things. The prophecy clearly states that the Chosen one is MALE. A female Harry wouldn't be targeted by Voldie and his Death Munchers. With no Harry, only Neville fits Canon prophecy. If you are going to have Harry be female and the "Chosen One", CHANGE THE WORDING OF THE PROPHECY. This would negate Neville being the other choice, but might open it up to other females possibly being the prophesied one. (14)The Vanishing Cabinet found in Room of Requirements BEFORE 6th year. In book 6, the Cabinet is in the ROR. However, people seem to forget that it wasn't always in the Room of Requirement. Authors are continuously putting the cabinet in the room in previous years. Fred and George stuffed Montague into it during Order of the Phoenix on the FIRST FLOOR. The elves eventually moved it to the Room of Hidden Things because it was damaged. I have seen so many stories where Harry goes back in time and destroys it or stories where he finds the ROR early and finds the Cabinet. (15)Authors stating that First Years are not allowed on the Quidditch Team. This is FALSE!! First Years are not allowed to bring a Broom during First Year. It has nothing to do with them being able to be on the team or not and it doesn't say they can't borrow someone else's broom if they do get on the team. I am sure that is how McGonagall got around the rule. Since she bought the broom, it was technically hers. Probably gave it to Harry to keep it at the end of the year or had him purchase it from her. (16) Skele-Gro is used to fix broken bones. It isn't. Madam Pomfrey states states in Chamber of Secrets that she could have knitted Harry's bones back together in no time at all (most likely a bone knitting Charm), but because they were vanished THAT is what required the Skele-Gro. It isn't used to fix normal everyday broken bones. (17) Fudge was Minister of Magic in 1981 and the reason so many Death Eaters got off by bribing him. According to Harry Potter Wiki, Cornelius Fudge didn't become Minister of Magic until 1990. Millicent Bagnold was Minister during the time Voldie was living as a wraith in Albania. Fudge was a junior member of the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes. We find that out in book 3 when he says he was there when Sirius got arrested. Fudge gets blamed a lot in Fanon, but let's get the timelines right. (18) The idea that Pius Thickness was a willing follower of Voldemort Pius was NOT a willing follower of Voldemort. We find out in the beginning of Deathly Hallows that Yaxley with "great effort" was able to put Pius under the Imperious. With Thickness being the Head of the DMLE, this allowed Voldie a huge advantage in getting his own men around Scrimgouer so he could be assassinated and the Ministry taken over. (19) Harry doing Summer Homework the summer after 5th Year. Harry (and Ron and Hermione) have just taken their OWL exams and don't get the results until the middle of the summer. Therefore they DON"T know what classes they can take for 6th year. How could any professor assign homework when the student may not even take that course anymore. (20) Authors not listing pairings or warning of Slash in the summaries or in Author Notes. As you might have guessed by my earlier comments, I despise Harry/Ginny stories. I don't read Slash either. I don't care how well written it is, i am not going to read it. So I really hate it when I am getting into a really good story and then without any warning, the author pairs Harry and Ginny together. or has Slash in the story. A little common courtesy would be for the author to give some sort of warning to the readers what to expect. (21) Authors that make Harry too tall for his age. I continually read stories that have Harry fixing his malnourished body (which is a good thing), but they take it too far and make him into some sort of Olympic athlete while still a kid. I read one story that had him being over 6 feet tall at the age of 14. The average 14 year old boy is about 5'4"-5'5". Of course there are always exceptions, but please make it reasonable. Don't turn him into Shaquille O'Neil before he's even turn 16. And remember, teenage boys grow much later than girls. I know from personal experience that most of the girls I went to school with were much taller than me til I turned 16 and started to get taller. (22) Why would Dursley's abuse Harry if they thought he was a squib? Often in Wrong Boy who lived stories, a young Harry is sent to the Dursley's because they think he is a squib, while his brother is raised by James and Lily to be the "Prophesied" one. Ignoring my previous rant, (#9) It always amazes me why Harry is then abused by the Dursley's until he gets his Hogwarts letter. WHY? They think he is normal. They would have no reason to treat him as a "Freak". And if he shows signs of magic, they would just send him back to Lily. (23) That Durmstrang and Beauxbatons arriving to Hogwarts at the beginning of the School year. This is wrong. It was in the movie, not the books. The director had the schools arriving at the beginning of the term. In Canon, they arrived the day before Halloween. |
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