47 Ways To Annoy a Non-Harry Potter Fan:

1) Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books or movies.

2) Crowd their in box with Harry Potter related emails, make the subject misleading.

3) Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their b-day and demand they cherish it 4-ever

4) Pretend you can do magic.

5) Yell "CRUCIO" whenever they insult Harry Potter.

6) If your late for something blame it on your broken time turner.

7) Sort every person you meet in to one of the four houses.

8) Say "Lumos" every time you turn on a light.

9) If your asked to retrieve something shout "Accio" loudly.

10) Refuse to wash your hair and explain you're going for the Snape look.

11) Spend hours at a time trying to make your broom fly.

12) Tap all brick walls you encounter with an umbrella.

13) Demand to know what exactly the function of a rubber duck is.

14) Carry around a hip flask and refuse to drink anything anyone else offers you.

15) Hum the Harry Potter theme all day long.

16) Talk to animals and insist that they're animagi.

17) Walk up to random people and ask if their initials are R.A.B.

18) Tell them that they're almost as smart as Grawp.

19) Refuse to tell them who Grawp is.

20) Whenever it gets foggy outside scream "The Dementors are coming!" and hide for days at a time.

21) Point at modern electronic devices and say "Look at that! The things these muggles come up with!"

22) Point and grunt and insist that your speaking troll.

23) Take them to a CD store and make them look for the new Weird Sisters Album.

24) Always speak with a British accent, especially if your not from the U.K.

25) Draw round glasses and a lightening bolt scar on every poster you come across.

26) Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.

27) Laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is.

28) Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move.

29) Break any awkward silences by saying "How 'bout them Chudley Canons."

30) Say "Alhomora" every time you open a door.

31) Every time you see them demand an explanation of why they don't like harry potter.

32) Say everything in a sing-song voice like Luna Lovegood.

33) Shriek loudly and say that you're speaking Mermish.

34) If they ask you about the weather solemnly say, "Mars is bright tonight."

35) Pretend your under an invisibility cloak and shout "You can't see me!"

36) Knit them a maroon jumper every year, especially if maroon isn't there color.

37) Draw the sign of the Hallow on every surface in the house.

38) While playing chess with them, stare at your pieces and give them verbal commands.

39) Throw the chess board across the room when the pieces don't move.

40) When one of the movies is on TV remind them every five minutes.

41) Refer to random people as "You Know Who."

42) Start swatting at the air saying there's a wrackspurt around.

43) Ask them to help you stuy for your O.W.L.'S

44) Walk around bumping into walls explaining your looking for the Room of Requirement.

45) Run up to random men with long dark hair and scream "SIRIUS! always knew you were alive!"

46) Hog the computer when making Harry potter videos on youtube.

47) Tell them that You Know Who was defeated today. When they ask who's you know who pretend to be offended and don't tell them who he is.

xxx

A good friend helps you up when you fall down. A best friend laughs and trips you again. Or sits on you back and forces you to stay down...

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will prank call him and whisper, " You will die in seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

A good friend never asks for anything to eat or drink. A best friend helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

A good friend calls your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. A best friend calls your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has you on speed dial.

A good friend borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. A best friend loses your junk and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

A good friend only know a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

A good friend will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. A best friend will kick the whole crowds butt that left you.

A good friend would knock on your front door. A best friend will walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

A good friend will help me find my way when I'm lost. A best friend will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

A good friend will help me learn to drive. A best friend will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.

A good friend will watch my pets when I go away. A best friend won't let me go away without them.

A good friend will go to a concert with me. A best friend will kidnap the band with me.

A good friend hides me from the cops. A best friend is probably the reason they are after me in the first place.

A good friend lets me make an idiot of myself in public. A best friend is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.

A good friend is only through school/college. A best friend is for life.

xxx

25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next
week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck k!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

xxx

Re-Post this to help stop racism!!:

A black man was talking to a white man and said: "I'm black. When I was born I was black. When I grew up, I was black. When I'm sick, I'm black. When I go in the sun, I'm black. When I'm cold, I'm black. When I die, I'll still be black. But you: When you were born, you were pink. When you grew up, you were white. When you're sick, you're green. When you go in the sun you're red. When you're cold, you're blue. When you die, you'll be purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored."

xxx

~19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity~

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

xxx

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. Hmm, what would happen if it was sunny the day Bella got hit by the van? Oh, story idea!! Must get computer!)

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')

After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then dissappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off. (once a key actually fell off!)

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

xxx

Favorite Pairings:

Vampire Diaries(Books): Stefan/Damon Damon/Bonnie Damon/Matt Elena/Stefan

Vampire Diaries(TV Show): Stefan/Damon Damon/Bonnie Damon/Alaric

Supernatural: Sam/Dean

Harry Potter: Harry/Draco Voldemort(Tom Riddle)/Harry Harry/Snape James/Snape James/Sirius Sirius/Remus Fred/George Fred/Harry/George Draco/Blaise

Danny Phantom: Danny/Vlad

Favorite Supernatural Quotes:

-Sam:(Sam jerks awake) Why did you let me fall asleep?

Dean: 'Cause I'm an awesome brother, so what did you dream about?

Sam: Lollipops ad candy canes.-Episode: Bloody Mary, Season One

-Dean:(Reading reports on mysterious death while Sam doesn't listen.) Hey! Am I boring you with this hunting-evil stuff?

Sam: No, I'm listening.

Dean:And here, a Sacramento man shot himself in the head...three times. (Waves three fingers in Sam's face.) Any of those blowing up your skirt, pal?-Episode: Home, Season One

-Dean:(To scarecrow) Dude, you're fugly.-Episode: Scarecrow, Season One

-Sam: Occasionally I miss boring.

Dean: So, this killer truck.

Sam: I miss conversations that don't start with "this killer truck."-Episode: Route 666, Season One

-Real Estate Agent: We accept home owners of any race, religion, color, or...sexual orinetation.

Dean: Right. Um, I'm going to go talk to Larry. Okay, Honey? (Smacks Sam on the ass as he walks away.)-Episode: Bugs, Season One

-"Might even run into Fred and Daphne when we're inside...hmmm...Daphne. Love her"-Dean, episode: Playthings

-"So King sized bed?" "What, uh, what, oh no..uh two singles, we're just brothers!"-Sam, episode: Playthings

-"Don't go surfing porn, that's not the kind of whacking I mean."-Dean, episode: Playthings

-"You shut up! I ain't talking to you! I don't like you!"

"Fair enough."-Sam, episode: Nightshifter

-"Dean did you use my computer?"

"No."

"Oh really? Because it's frozen on ."

*Stands there, walks away*

"Dean!"-Sam&Dean, episode: Tall Tales

-"You think you're funny?"

"I think I'm adorable." Dean, episode: Folsom Prison Blues

-"Yeah, being fugitives, friggin' dance party." Sam, What Is and What Never Should Be

-"Hey see if they have any pie." *Glare, car door slamming.*

"Bring me some pie!... I love me some pie." Dean&Sam, episode: All Hell Breaks Loose Part 1

-"I'm amazing. I'm Batman!"

"Yeah, you're batman." Sam&Dean, episode: Bad Day at Black Rock

-"Why do we move around so much?"

"Cause everywhere we go they get sick of your face." Little Sam&Dean, episode: A Very Supernatural Christmas

-"You think you're being funny but you're just being really really childish. Sam Winchester wears makeup. Sam Winchester cries his way through sex. Sam Winchester keeps a ruler by his bed and every morning when he wakes up-okay that's enough!" Sam&Dean, episode: Mystery Spot

-"About how gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day." Harry&Ed, episode: Ghostfacers!

"Tell me, what makes you so special?"

"I like to think it's because of my perky nipples." Dean, episode: Lazarus Rising

-"We still need to go see the new Raider's movie."

"Saw it."

"Without me?"

"You were in hell."

"That's no excuse." Sam&Dean, episode: Monster Movie

-"Having fun?"

"The whistle makes me their god."

"Nice shorts." Sam&Dean, episode: After School Special

-"Behave yourself will ya? No homework. Watch some porn." Dean, episode: The Monster At The End Of This Book