Title: I FEEL YOUR PAIN
Pairing: Damon, Alaric, Stefan, Elena, Elijah, Jeremy, Bonnie
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Friendship, Romance

Summary: Set around 4x02. Damon is saying his goodbye's to Alaric on his grave, unaware that three pairs of ears are listening. Stefan can feel Damon's pain and he is afraid of losing him. Will he be able to save his brother with the help of a few friends? And can they bring a certain someone back to the living?

AN/ This was the second hardest episode I've watched, the first being the one when Alaric died in Damon's arms. This idea was sitting in my notebook for quite some time, and I've decided to sit down and finally write it. I really hoped they would bring Alaric back in season 5, permanently and alive, not as a ghost. I really need some Dalaric moments… ( I will pretend season 4 never happened because I'm very disappointed. )

This story is mostly about Damon/Stefan brotherly love, but essentially, Damon/Alaric romance. This first chapter has one SLASH moment, so be warned. I will put the warning before that scene too, so that you, who don't like that kind of thing, can skip that part. However, Damon is the center of the story. His struggle with his emotions and the loss of his best friend and lover. Other characters, like Elena, Stefan, Caroline, Bonnie, Jeremy and Elijah are also included, and I think there will be one or two OC characters too, but later. Not in the first three chapters, though.

Anyway, I hope you'll like it, and please leave a thought or two. Enjoy!

Chapter 1

Stefan entered the Boarding House, his heart heavy. It's been days since Elena turned into a vampire, and he was barely coping with all of the emotions within him. It seemed everything was falling around him, like an avalanche, and he was hopeless to stop it. He felt so much guilt for listening to Elena when she asked him to pull Matt out of the water first, but he could never deny her stubborn selflessness. He loved her too much. And both of them knew what that action would bring. Death. He was certain Elena knew he wouldn't make it in time for her. and she asked him anyway. She was willing to die if that meant she would save the life of her childhood friend. Only, as it turned out, she didn't. She became what she didn't want. A vampire. A monster.

After he pulled her out of the water, he rushed to the hospital, carrying her in his arms, praying she would somehow survive, even though he couldn't hear her heartbeat. Dr. Fell caught him in the hallway and quickly started working on Elena. She came back once, but her internal bleeding was too big, so she did what she thought was for the best. He watched helplessly as she injected herself with vampire blood, and he did nothing to stop her. he couldn't let her die, even though he knew that wasn't what she would want.

While he waited in the morgue for her to wake up, his thoughts went to Damon. He knew he was miles away, probably fighting with his lover, his best friend. He knew Alaric was dead as soon as Elena's heartbeat stopped. He was running toward the hospital, carrying her in his arms when that happened. Moments later, he felt it. A pain so sharp his legs gave away. Falling to his knees he gasped for air. It was too strong. Tears threatened and he blinked them away, and forced himself to get up, doubling his speed.

They were brothers, bounded by blood. They could feel each other emotions, more strongly now when they were vampires. He remembered what one of the maids told him once about the day their mother died. He was still a baby, but he felt pain in his heart. That was Damon's pain. For over a year, Damon was committed to bed rest, while he, a mere baby, couldn't stop crying. Not until their teen years did they realize what they were sharing. And now, he felt as Damon's heart shattered in million pieces. Because he knew. If Alaric was dead, so was Elena. Two more precious people in Damon's life were dead.

Stefan accepted, long time ago, that his brother loved both Elena and Alaric. He was shocked at first when he saw them together, but eventually, he accepted it. Damon was happy with Alaric, he never seen him more human than when the two of them were together. And he could see Alaric loved him back. Strangely, Alaric could also accept Damon loved Elena too, and he didn't mind.

BEGINNING OF THE FLASHBACK

(WARNING: this flashback has SLASH in it, so if you don't want to read it, skip it.)

Stefan was silently humming when he entered the Boarding House. He just dropped Elena at her house after their date. He was so lost in his thoughts of their romantic dinner and walk…their kisses under the moonlight, when suddenly he stopped dead in his track, seeing the thing he thought never could happen.

Damon and Alaric, making out on the sofa in front of the fireplace. They were both shirtless and their pants were unbuttoned. Neither noticed he was there, and he was too shocked to move. He watched Alaric straddling Damon, and his eyes widened when their hard dicks appeared. 'When did their pants fell?' Stefan thought. He couldn't move, he was mesmerized by the site before him. Alaric was still stroking Damon's dick when Damon lowered his head and took Alaric's into his mouth. Soon, Alaric was shaking and moaning Damon's name in ecstasy, and then he exploded.

"You came pretty quickly today, Ric." Damon smirked, satisfied.

"Well, I have been craving for you all day. It's my turn now." Alaric said and kneeled in front of Damon, taking his dick into his mouth.

Damon's smug face fell and he moaned Ric's name. Few moments later, he came.

"You were pretty quick too." Alaric commented as he got up. "I want to fuck you."

"Do you have the lube?" Damon asked.

"Always."

Damon changed his position. He was now on his knees on the sofa, his ass in the air. Alaric put some lube on his fingers and started preparing Damon for his entrance. When he was certain the vampire was open enough, he pushed his dick into Damon.

Damon groaned in pain, but then after a couple of pushes, he relaxed.

"Yes, that's it! Fuck me Ric! Fuck me!" Damon moaned, lost in the bliss.

Stefan watched, openmouthed, his brother being fucked by Alaric. He wasn't only shocked. No. He was turned on, too. He wasn't even aware he was stroking himself over the pants. 'Shower. He needed a shower. A cold one.' Slowly, he went upstairs and went to his bathroom. He could still hear them. It was now Alaric's turn to be fucked, and Stefan groaned. This will be one hell of a night.

The cold shower didn't help. He was still turned on, and the images of what he saw ran wildly through his mind. Deciding it was best to deal with his hardness, he stroked himself and came soon after. He couldn't believe he got turn on by watching his brother fuck. He could blame their bond for it, but he knew that was only partially true.

"I didn't peg you for a voyeur, brother." Damon said, lying on his bed, fully clothed, when he emerged from the bathroom.

"I don't know what you are talking about." Stefan answered, praying he would buy it. No such luck. 'How long was I in the shower?' He thought.

"Sure you don't. You're forgetting who you're talking too. I could hear and sense you. And don't forget our bond. Speaking of, you were turned on, weren't you?" Damon smirked.

"If you knew I was there, why didn't you say something?" Stefan scoffed at his brother.

"And ruin a perfect moment? Why would I do that? Beside, I wanted to see how you would react. You, being turned on didn't cross my mind, to be honest"

Stefan sighed and sat on his bed, looking at Damon.

"Can I ask you something?" At Damon's nod, he continued. "Where is Alaric now?"

"Sleeping in my bed. But that wasn't what you wanted to ask me."

"How?" Stefan didn't know what to ask first. "How did you and Alaric end up together? When did it start? I thought you two were only drinking buddies."

"We've been together for over a year now. Started when we saved your ass when you were abducted by the tomb vampires. It was supposed to be only a one-time deal, but somehow we continued drinking and ending up in his apartment. On thing led to another…"

"And Elena? I thought you are in love with her."

"I do love her. I don't know. Truth is, I'm confused. I feel something for Ric. I don't know what it is yet, but it's more than just friendship."

"And is he okay with your feelings toward Elena?"

"I don't know. He says it's ok, that he is fine with it, that she needs all of us. But, when I'm with her, it feels like I'm letting him down. I don't know."

"One day you'll know." Stefan said, then remembered what Damon said. "How did you think I'd react seeing you two together?"

"Oh, I thought you would either pass out or flip." Damon laughed, leaving his room. "By the way, I will tell Ric you saw us. So we don't have to hide it, at least not in front of you."

"Okay, but next time, please warn me before you two…you know." Stefan said waving his hand in the air.

"Sure thing, brother. Sure thing."

END OF THE FLASHBACK

And now, Damon lost both of them. As far as he knew. Stefan wondered what will that do to Damon. Losing everything he loved will push him over the edge and he was worried for his brother. As if his thinking of him summoned him, he heard Damon's frantic voice outside the morgue doors. Preparing for the worst, he looked toward the door, and a second later, Damon entered.

Although he thought he was prepared, he wasn't. Damon looked like he just came from the war. He was covered with blood, his clothes were ripped, something his brother wouldn't dare appearing in public. He was visibly shaking. But what frightened Stefan the most, were his eyes. Once bright ocean blue, now were dull, no shine whatsoever. There was nothing in them. His brother was broken, and Stefan doubted he would ever heal. There was a flicker of pain in Damon's eyes when he looked at Elena's lying form. Stefan waited for another emotion, and moment later he was pressed to the wall by, now, angry Damon. Yes, that was what he was waiting for. Anger. It was better than seeing nothing.

"What did you do?" Damon asked through his teeth.

"I did what she asked me to." Stefan answered, not even trying to shake off Damon's hard grip on his neck. "She and Matt were in the car when…I didn't have the time to save them both."

"What did you do?" Damon asked again. He knew what his brother was about to say, but he wanted to hear it from his mouth.

"She made the choice for me. I saved Matt first."

"You let her die!" Damon said brokenly, releasing his brother.

It was too much. Because of one wrong choice, two people were now dead. Gone. Damon chocked back a sob and tears appeared. He stumbled when he moved from Stefan, and when his brother tried to catch him he waved him off. He was left with nothing. Alaric was dead, and even though Elena would wake up soon, she made her choice. Stefan. All he was left with was pain. So much pain. And anger…and betrayal… But mostly pain….

Stefan watched his brother closely. He could see and feel his emotions. The worry returned when Damon stumbled once again, and he rushed to help, only to be pushed away.

Suddenly, they heard a gasp for air, and Elena opened her eyes. Stefan rushed toward her, but Damon stayed in the corner. He felt nothing. Sure, he was glad Elena was alive, but since she chose his brother over him once again, he gave up. From everything.

"Matt! How is Matt?" Elena asked, looking around then at Stefan.

"He is fine. They will keep him overnight since he swallowed a lot of water, but tomorrow he'll be released." Stefan answered calmly.

"Oh. Good." Elena relaxed, but then she noticed where she was. "Why am I in a morgue?" When Stefan didn't answer and his eyes watered, her eyes widened in realization. "I died." She said flatly. "But? No! I can't be a vampire! I don't want to be one!"

Stefan explained what went on since he pulled her out of the water and what Meredith did. The only thing he didn't mention was the part that involved his brother. He was aware of Damon's stilled form behind him, as well of the emotion waves he was assaulted with. The amount of pain Damon was feeling was too much and tears clouded Stefan's vision.

"Come. Meredith said we have to leave as soon as you wake up." Stefan said and helped Elena off the table.

It was then Elena noticed Damon was in the room with them, and she frowned at the site of him.

"Damon? What…?" However, what ever she planed on asking died on her lips, because Damon turned and without a word left the morgue.

Elena was confused. What was wrong with Damon? Why was he covered with blood, and why was he in shreds? Why wasn't he happy she was alive? Okay, semi-alive? She looked at Stefan for an answer, but he only shook his head.

"Leave him be. It's for the best."

Stefan prayed he was doing the right thing, not going after his brother, but Elena needed him right now. He will deal with Damon later.

AN/ This is it for the first chapter. I have completed chapter two and three, and currently on chapter four. However, they are in my notebook so I have to type them down. I will publish one chapter per week. So, in the meantime, tell me what you think and you can also read my other stories.