Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Wolf. Thanks everyone who reviewed in French and English!

"Whoa, whoa, Stiles, I can't understand a word you're saying! How much adderall did you take?" Scott asked into the phone when he heard the jumbled mess that tumbled out of Stiles's mouth.

"None. Butyouseethat'stheing-"

"Stiles. Pause between words," Scott said.

"Derek! Derek is my problem!" Stiles said.

"Oh. Did you finally figure out he's tearing your shirts on purpose and not because it's the full moon so you'll have to wear his?" Scott asked. There was a pause.

"What?" Stiles demanded.

"Uh, nothing," Scott tried to correct hastily.

"You know what, no, never mind, I'll deal with that later. You need to come over here and do something werewolf-y and make my dad hate Derek again-"

"What are you talking about?" Scott asked.

"They like each other, Scott! And do you know what that means for me? Parent and boyfriend in cahoots," Stiles said. "This means plotting and the sharing of baby pictures-"

"Don't you think you're over reacting?" Scott asked.

"Over- no I'm not overreacting! Dad invited Derek to Friday night dinner, Scott!"

"Whoa," Scott said. "He, uh, might just want to interrogate him?"

"He never invited Lydia to Friday night dinner," Stiles said.

"You weren't dating Lydia," Scott reminded him.

"Anyways," Stiles said loudly. "He invited Derek over civilly, after what happened at the dance. Derek was over and we were playing video games. And with no glaring, no hard parent handshake, no pretend smile- it was a real one- with no malice- he just said, 'Derek, would you like to come over for dinner on Friday night?' and Derek, being the sweet bastard he is said, 'Sure Mr. Stilinski, I'd love to.'"

"Derek said, 'love'?" Scott asked doubtfully.

"Well, no, he said, 'that'd be great,'- but that's not the point, Scott! They're getting cozy!" Stiles said. "He even used his 'impress the dad' voice! I didn't even know he had an 'impress the dad' voice! I knew he had a flirty voice because of that time he flirted with that officer but-"

"Isn't it a good thing he's trying to impress your dad?" Scott asked.

"Not when he'll have access to my baby pictures!" Stiles shouted.

"You do have some embarrassing baby pictures," Scott mumbled under his breath. "He's a werewolf. He could sneak into your house and find them anyways and you'd never know until he started laughing at something that was in one of the pictures."

"Well, you know what, Scott? You're in them too!" Stiles said.

"I'll sneak into your house and burn them later," Scott promised.

"Wait, no, don't do that. Mom wrote on most of them," Stiles groaned.

"Well then we'll bury it in the backyard," Scott said.

"You don't think he'll be able to smell it?" Stiles asked.

"We'll put wolfsbane around it," Scott said. "So what happened to your dad wanting to kill Derek? You know, since he's like, five years older than us and you're not eighteen."

"I don't know," Stiles said. "He promised me that he wouldn't be polishing his gun when Derek got here and he'd make sure it was hidden out of sight, not that really matters, since Derek would probably be able to smell the gun powder in it-"

"Wow. He really does like him," Scott said.

"I know! It's awful! And Derek's encouraging it, asking him how his job is, what's new on football- did you know Derek followed football? Because I sure didn't-" Stiles rambled.

"Yeah, we play tackle football all the time," Scott said.

"Well why can't I play?" Stiles pouted.

"Uh…"

"Right, big, strong, scary werewolves that could rip my throat out with your teeth… or your claws," Stiles shuddered. "But my dad talks back! It's weird! And he let Derek take me on a date without saying anything. Not even a disapproving look!"

"Do you think he's just trying to make up for publically embarrassing you at a school we're you're already kind of an outcast?" Scott asked.

"No, he mumbled some awkward apology and we went and got fast food and saw a movie," Stiles said dismissively. "Then he apologized again after he calmed down from turning on the siren and spinning around to speed off in the direction of Derek's house and then turned back around so we could go see the movie. My dad is up to something, Scott. And if it's not my dad, then it's Derek."

"What are they planning, Stiles?" Scott sighed.

"He's gonna tell Derek not to let me drive his Camaro!"