![]() Author has written 1 story for Twilight. Hello As you have probably guessed my name is Laura. I am from the UK. I am also a big fan of NCIS, CSI:New York and the Twilight series. In NCIS my favorite pairings are definetly: Tony DiNozzo and Ziva David, Leroy Jethro Gibbs and Jenny Shepard and Abby Scuito and Timothy McGee. I have endless boxsets of NCIS and now really love it. My favorite pairing in CSI:NY would have to be: Danny and Lindsay. I love that they have fought so hard to work through all their problems. My favorite pairings in the Twilight saga would have to be Paul and Rachel, Kim and Jared and Alice and Jasper. In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Frito's! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD I have recently joined fiction press and when I have got a few more chapters of Rachel returns up I will be creating my own story on there. So when it is up, go check it out. My profile is: http://www.fictionpress.info/u/728575/BookloverLaura. I am up as the same name, so look me up. If your heart was really broken...you'd be dead so shut up. Did you just call me a bitch? Well a bitch is a dog, and dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, nature is beautiful. So yeah, thanks for the compliment. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? I accused your boyfriend of being gay and he hit me with his purse. The next time you think you're perfect, try walking on water. God created men first because He wanted to make a rough draft before creating a masterpiece. I do not suffer from insanity! I enjoy every minute of it! You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. My friends are the type that would spend hours trying to drown a fish. Parents spend the first part of your life teaching you to walk and talk and for the rest of it they tell u to sit down and shut up. My mother told me never to talk to strang people. I never talk to myself, parents, of friends anymore. It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full. Just drink it and get it over with! Don't follow in my footsteps. I tend to walk into walls. They say guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well i think guns help because is you stood there and yelled "BANG!" I don't think you'd kill too many people. I'm the kind of person who would burst out laughing in the middle of dead silence because of something that happened yesterday! Heaven's doesn't want me and Hell's afraid I'll take over. I smile because I don't know what the hell's going on. My mind not only wanders. Sometimes it leaves completely! Come over to the good side, we have Jasper Hale and chocolate! When little girls wanted to be ballet dancers, I wanted to be a vampire. If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you. Let's flip a coin: heads, we'll be together; tails, we'll flip again When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back Boys are like trees - they take fifty years to grow up We're best friends. You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, dang I'm gonna miss you If you love reading really long books just for the heck of it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever sang the "I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves" song copy this into your profile! If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile! If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile! If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile. If you're against animal cruelty then copy this into your profile! If you like animals, give one a home if you can. If you already have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this onto your profile If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile. If you're one of those people who gets excited when you see just two reviews, copy and paste this into your profile. If you write just for the heck of it, copy and paste this into your profile If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing, or a combination of both, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile. I'm the kind of who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday. If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever talked to/argued with yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have a tendency to talk/sing to yourself copy and paste this to your profile. If you have the tendency to talk to yourself copy this onto your profile!! There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. If you have ever pulled on a door that said push, or vise versa, copy and paste this on your profile. If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile. If you've ever pulled on a door and complained about it being locked or really heavy, only to have someone point out to you that you're supposed be pushing on the door or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile. If random songs pop into your head for no apparent reason, copy and paste this on your profile. If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy and past this into your profle If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile (hopefully evryone (excluding Edward/ all vamps) copies this one!) Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! People say that I'm weird, but I think that weird is strange, and strange is odd, and odd is different, and different is unique, and everyone is unique, so unique is normal, so therefore I am normal. If the same is true for you, copy this onto your profile! If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile. If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this to your profile. If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this to your profile. If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this to your profile. If, for any particular reason you have laughed during a movie that wasn't funny, copy this onto your profile! If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile. If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.. If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile. If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. If you have ever begged your parents for something so much they get frustrated and buy you the thing you were begging for copy and paste this to your profile. 30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are in love with a long list of fictional characters, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste If you have ever tripped up the stairs copy this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile. 98 percent of teenagers have either smoke pot or tried to smoke it. If your one of those 2 percent, copy and paste this to your profile Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile! If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your pro! If you have a friend that thinks Twilight is stupid copy and paste this onto your profile. If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you always have a song stuck in your head, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a walking, talking Twilight series encyclopedia and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile. If you have so many dreams about Twilight that you have lost count, copy and paste this on your profile. IF YOU BELIEVE THERE IS A JASPER HALE OUT THERE FOR YOU COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE If you are seriously in love with Jasper Hale and or Jackson Rathbone, copy this into your profile If you think Seth is a brilliant little werewolf and you just want to hug him to death or just give him a cookie (or a dozen), copy and paste this onto your profile. IF YOU ARE SO OBSESSED WITH TWILIGHT IT ISN'T EVEN FUNNY ANY MORE COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy this onto your profile. If you or your best friends are insane copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever choked on your own spit, copy and paste this onto your profile There is nothing wrong with any religion, race, sexual orientation, or gender. If you believe in tolerance towards all people, copy and paste this into your profile. When every you see an apple you think of twilight copy this into you profile If whenever you see or hear the name "Jasper" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile If when ever you are out in public and you hear something relating to Twilight you want to scream and squeal, but you don't 'cause you're in public, so you just get a goofy grin on your face. If you support the ‘Make Edward change Bella into a vampire’ club, copy this into your profile. If you trip over something and the first thing you think to yourself is "I just had a Bella Moment" copy and paste this onto your profile. After i read new moon i hated jacob black!! I wanted him to die!! And after i read eclipse, I wanted to kill him mutiple times!! I read Eclipse and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD!! If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this to your profile. If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you are reading this line, copy and paste it in your profile. If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer. If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this to your profile. If you are not sure if you find these 'copy and paste things' annoying or if you love them, copy and paste this on your profile. If you honestly read all the above copy and pastes, copy and paste this into your profile =D STEREOTYPES
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists. I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz. I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed. I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy. I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. I'm a LESBIAN, so I must have a sex-tape. I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terriost. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world. I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals. I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay. I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convienance store. I'm NATIE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore. I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I wear SHORT SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob. I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo. I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars. I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy. I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore. I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut. I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals. I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK. I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST! I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin. I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I DRESS IN UNSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I'm INTO THEATER AND ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe. I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer. I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll. I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi. I hang out with some GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO. I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT. I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited. I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13. I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy. I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction. I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent. I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I must be ugly...or crazy. I'm BLACK so I must love fried chicken and kool-aid. I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot. I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7. I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals. I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up. I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist. I'm in a BAND, so I MUST be a dork. I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WAS A BROTHA. I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect. I'm WHITE and have black friends so i MUST think I'm black. I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil. I love SHOPPING, so i MUST be rich. I'm an OG so I must be mexican. If you hate stereotypes and think people should just SHUT UP AND STOP, POST THIS! The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism. My drama teacher, who has now left, told me this and I have always believed it so I was glad when I found it on someone's profile. It is a strong saying that really defeats racism. |
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