Name: Boy 15, Bones

Age: 26

Location: Small Town, USA

BIO: First and foremost, I am a smartass. I'm a guy who has a passion for writing and if you're not blind you can tell I like using Naruto for most of my fics. Naruto is the perfect character in my opinion to toss around and mess with. Kishimoto didn't give us a solid background other than him being an orphan and looked down upon by the rest of the village, so he's malleable. He's also an outcast hyperactive loudmouth, something I can relate to as I was a little Naruto when I was younger.

I'm still pretty loud, but throw me in a crowd I'll become a mute. Socially Awkward for the win. I'm going to college to find my place in the world. I have a cat (one full black little bastard) and a dog (a mutt, affectionately deemed such, who's part schnoodle and some other breed). I have two older sisters and a younger brother, all raised by two loving parents who supported us in our endeavors.

Favorite Anime/Manga: Naruto, Inuyasha (first ever anime/manga), Full Metal Alchemist, and Trigun. Always open to reading more though. Don't worry, Eng. I'll get to Log Horizon sooner or later.

Favorite Movie Genres (too many favorite movies to list): Action, Comedy, Horror, Sci-Fi, Psychological Thriller, Disaster, Monster, B Movies, and Novel/Comic Adaptations - yes even if they sucked. I LOVE the entertainment industry...not the people in it, but the things they dish out to the public.

Favorite Type of Music: Ha! I have one answer for this: EVERYTHING! Really it depends on my mood. But hands down, my favorite song is "The Touch" by Stan Bush. How could you not be inspired by that?

Favorite Books/Comics: Any DC or Marvel Comic, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Harry Potter, Inheritance Cycle, Video Game adaptations (The Halo novels were well written), and classic novels such as Dracula, Frankenstein, or anything done by H. G. Wells. I'm always on the lookout for something new to read.

Favorite TV shows: I will watch anything. From Doctor Who to My Little Pony, you name it and I'll have probably watched a few episodes of it. Most recently, I've become enamored with The CW's The Flash and iZombie. Arrow has become far too much like a wannabe Batman for me, but I'll occasionally tune in. And before you ask: No. I don't watch Gotham.

Favorite YouTube Channels: I'm surprised no one has started this yet...Anyway, I ADORE the Game Grumps first and foremost. They're friggin geniuses and remind me of how my friends and I act when we just sit around playing video games...until someone starts to die over and over again and get pissed the Eff off. Then it's only the watchers that are laughing. I also learn a lot about the video games that brought forward the idea of Elder Scrolls and others.

Favorite Video Games: Elder Scrolls for the WIN, DC Universe Online via PS3, the Uncharted Series, God of War series, Jak and Daxter series, Star Wars Battlefront series, Saints Row 2-4, Halo Series, don't know anyone that hates CoD (except maybe most parents), Dead Space series, Dragon Age series, most Marvel-based games, Grand Theft Auto (who doesn't?), I have every LEGO game (haters can suck it), The Gears of War series, Mass Effect 1 2 & 3 (the ending was sad...till I got the DLC), Red Planet, Far Cry 3, and there's so many more that I can't list them all!

Favorite Past Time: Reading fan fiction right here on The Pit. Good or bad, I love it all. Fanfiction gives us a community to bring us together. Sure, some stories are left to rot, unfinished due to personal problems, but rereading them is inspiring. The dreaded Author's Note, while disappointing, is important to read before the story begins. It's insight and fun to see how others express themselves.

Top Quotes

"Mr. White? Are you smoking weed? Oh my god... wait a minute, is that, is that my weed? What the hell man, make yourself at home why don't you." - Jesse Pinkman to Walter White, Breaking Bad.

"Yeah bitch! Magnets!" - Pinkman after his laptop was destroyed.

"Where's my money, Bitch?" - Stewie while beating up Brian.

"Now listen to me, I'm older and I'm wiser-" "Yeah, well, you're half right." - Earl and Val arguing in Tremors.

"Cold nothin...that sonovabitch's dead. We killed it. Ha! FUCK! YOU!" - Kevin Bacon, Tremors.

"I understand that you are arresting me for robbery, but I licked the money, therefore it is mine." -Unknown, but genius.

"Everybody shut up, I'm trying to science!" - Markiplier.

"All the people who blame video games and shit for the violence in the world are idiots because I played Pac-Man all my life and you don't see me sitting in a dark room eating pills." - Neighbor

"In my lifetime, I have learned: hard work pays off. Dreams come true. Bad times don’t last, but bad guys do." – Scott Hall.

"No WWE talent becomes a legend on their own. Every man's heart one day beats its final beat. His lungs breathe their final breath. And if what that man did in his life makes the blood pulse through the body of others and makes them believe deeper in something larger than life then his essence, his spirit, will be immortalized. By the story tellers, by the loyalty, by the memory of those who honor him and make the running the man did live forever. You, you, you, you, you, you are the legend makers of Ultimate Warrior. In the back I see many potential legends. Some of them with warrior spirits. And you will do the same for them. You will decide if they lived with the passion and intensity. So much so that you will tell your stories and you will make them legends, as well. I am Ultimate Warrior. You are the Ultimate Warrior fans. And the spirit of The Ultimate Warrior will run forever!" —The Ultimate Warrior (1959-2014) induction speech to WWE Hall of Fame, April 5th, 2014. RIP Warrior.

"Lines are literally Hitler." - A Friend.

"On my deathbed I will request a peanut M&M and a Reese's cup. If I'm going to die, I'm going to know just what the hell I'm missing out on all my life." - Me.

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow

NOTE: I write as a HOBBY, updates are few and far in between for some stories. Sorry if it pisses you off...Not really. Kinda...I'll just go stand over there now...Here's some art! Remove the (DOT)

Kyu and Naruto from SHDG: tenshinta (DOT) deviantart (DOT) com/art/SHDG-Naruto-Uzamaki-Namikaze-and-Kyuubi-425057962

Veritas Aequitas' Naruto and Yang: manu-chann (DOT) deviantart (DOT) com/art/Commission-Naruto-and-Yang-583028085

Honorary Member of The Book of Log.

If you worship the holyness that is the log, copy and paste this section onto your profile... although you may want to change the comments

Position: Log Worshipper (Since 10/19/2013)

Possible Book of Log Positons:

Log Worshipper: Beginning position. No requirements

Log Priest: You have created at least 1 Naruto related fanfic that frequently (every 2-4 chapers) praises the almighty log and actually fits into the story

Log Pope (there can be more than 1 pope... its safer that way): you have created 3 naruto related fanfics that frequently praise the almighty log

OR the Fanfic that already occasionally praises the log has at least 400 reviews

OR you create a (decently made) Naruto fanfic focused on praising the log... log forbid.

Excerpt of the log number 124: when using the log to escape a fire jutsu, it is konoha custom to write an apology letter to the log, and depending on rank of jutsu escaped from depicts how many words are needed. c-rank, two thousand, B-rank, one thousand five hundred, a-rank, one thousand. only S-rank and higher or excused from the writing of the letter. even then, it is still reccommended.

Log excerpt number 231: if konoha shinobi celebrate the holiday of Christmas, then it is required that they put gifts under the Christmas log. Use of a full tree is an insult to the log and if found out that shinobi is uneligible from using the log for a period of two months.

Log excerpt number 437: Use of the log in a situation that clearly could be avoided using a variety of other methods or techniques is looked down upon. In order to repent for such actions, the following steps should be taken:

For every dent caused by your replacement you shall plant one sapling.

For every stab wound caused by your replacement you shall plant five saplings.

For every hole in the log caused by your replacement you shall plant ten saplings.

For every detached piece of the log caused by your replacement you shall plant one sapling per square inch of detached log.

For a destroyed and unusable log caused by your replacement you shall plant twenty-five saplings.

If your log is defective you may call 1-800-BAD-LOGS to file a complaint. If your case is proven correctly your next replacement will be half off.

'and the willow sayeth unto the ninja: wherefore dost i weep? 'tis tears of joy, as thy kin and mine together fell thine foes, who would bring the axe and torch to the wood. the log ist thine ally, and mine kin. calling upon the log, is to call upon me. to aid thee in battle, i weep my tear of joy. and the ninja spoke: yea, thee and thine kin shall forever be blessed among me and mine kin. for thine bravery will never be forgotten.' -book of the log, song of the willow, verses 1-4

'as the log takes your place, you become the log. the log becomes you. for a moment, you are an extension of the logs blessing unto ninja.' -book of the log, chronicle of the replacement verse 3

'you are fools! your log is but a mockery of the power of ninja!- the ninja from the desert declared. and the people shook their heads. you have been denied the log for a long time, sandwalker. we cannot force you to see the glory of the log, but know this. when the time comes, and you have no other allies to call upon, the log will hear your prayers, and aid you.' -book of the log, redwood journals verses 15-16

'and as the smoke cleared, his foe stared in awe at the log. blackened and charred, the log crumbled. the ninja, filled with righteous wrath, fell upon his foe and slew him. he made his way to the log, and wept. his companion, the log that had accompanied him through so many battles, was no more. he spoke thus to his fallen companion: though now you have fallen in battle, you rest where the logs forever grow. the forest of life called for you, and you answered its call, as you did mine. i thank you my friend.' -book of the log, honor of the forest canticle I, verses 78-82

'he despaired, for in this place of stone and earth, there was no logs to be found. reaching out with all his might, he begged for a log in the forsaken wasteland. and he was answered, and saved by the log, in a place where there were none. -book of the log, wanderers saga, verses 7-9

'the log took his place and fell, forever into the abyss. the people, hearing of this, railed against him, in such numbers he swore to never endanger another log again. for many years, he fought without the log, growing more and more weary with each passing day. finally, he came across a foe that was too strong for him. as his life was about to end, he felt a familiar pull, and found himself out of harms way, seeing a log in his place. his stunned foe was felled in his stupor, and he approached the log, he knew it, for it was the same that fell so long ago. he asked of the log: why did you endanger yourself for me again? have you not done enough for me? and the log spoke: it is my duty, and our bond. we exist to save the ninja, and they exist to save the trees. we both play a part, for which i am content.' -book of the log, honor of the forest canticle II, verses 59-70

Let it be known that it is absolutely forbidden to willingly perform the technique known as "1000 years of death" on a log. It is also equally frowned upon for one to replace oneself with a holy log for the purpose of avoiding said technique. The punishment for such actions is at least 6 months of banishment from the use of the holy log.

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh?

Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind

*Words to live by: "Don't hate someone you don't know, because you might eventually hurt someone you love."