hello. my name is kierney. i am 15 years old, irish, currently reside in California, pagan, love my brothers more than anything, and have to admit that i am completely obsessed with vampires, werewolves, and dead things.

i want to be an FBI agent or a consultant--so that im not necessarily required to go by the rules. makes things easier. i also want to be an author and have my first book published before i graduate high school.

reading is my favorite thing to do as is looking at the stars.

i watch lots of crime shows (including: NCIS, In Plain Sight, the Mentalist, Bones, Psych, White Collar, and Burn Notice) USA Network is my favorite. i also like the Vampire Diaries show but am kind of conflicted. its so different from the book. i mean, wheres Meredith? how can you cut a main character?

If you're one of those people who read the Vampire Diaries books and then watched the show and said, "WTF?! Where's Meredith?" copy this to your profile.

some of my favorite books are Twilight, the Vampire Diaries, the Percy Jackson and the Olympians books, the Bewitching mysteries, the Psycic Eye mysteries, the Ghost Hunter mysteries, the Vampire Kisses series, the Mercy Thompson series, the Georgina Kinkaid series, the Vampire Academy books, the Evernight series, the Darkest Powers trilogy, Need, the Immortals series, Katie Maxwell's Goth books, the Mortal Instruments trilogy, the Strange Angels series, the nightwalker series, the 1-800-WHERE-R-YOU series, the Stephanie Plum books, the House of Night series, and Rampant (who doesn't love killer unicorns?).

i love all movies with will ferrel, sandra bullock, and harrison ford.

i like rock and country music best. i dont really have a favorite band/artist but i like Three Days Grace, Bullet for my Valentine, Rise Against, Dashboard Confessional, MCR, Tokio Hotel, Breaking Benjamin, Taking Back Sunday, Taylor Swift, Dierks Bentley, Tim McGraw, Gretchen Wilson, Brooks and Dunn, Dixie Chicks, and Josh Turner.

also, i am a bit of a pyro. but dont worry. i have yet to set anything on fire. well... anything important at least.

Therapist = the / rapist ...scary thought.

.Favorite Quotes.
-From TV-

"Everything here is eatable. I am eatable, but that, my children, is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies." -charlie and the chocolate factory

Maddie: "Do you know what his first word was? It was Michael."
Michael: "It was juice. I was there. His first word was juice."
Maddie: "But he was looking right at you when he said it..." -burn notice, about nate

"Here's some spaghetti. You're very rude." -dane cook

"Muah ha ha ha. He told you not to. Muah ha ha ha. I am Windextor. I will cleanse your soul!" -dane cook

"PETER!!" -dane cook

Grandma: "Nicholas. Nicholas! Can you help me with this gallon of milk, right here, this gallon of milk? It's the heaviest thing I've ever seen in my life! I can't move it at all, this gallon of milk. Please, help me."
Nick: "What? You mean this gallon, RIGHT HERE?" -lifts gallon way over head-
Grandma: -gasps- "Nicholas! You're the strongest boy in the world!
Nick: "Grandma, you look tired. Why don't you sit down on this STOOL?" -lifts stool way over head-
Grandma: "NICHOLAS! You should fight crime! Oh, my lord..." -nick swardson, comedy central presents

"You smell funny." -jack sparow, pirates of the caribbean

"May the flea's of a thousand camels infest your crotch!" -jan, eyeliner of the gods

Isabelle: "Mom and Dad won't be pleased if they find out."
Simon: "That you freed a possible criminal by trading away your brother to a warlock who looks like a gay Sonic the Hedgehog and dresses like the Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang? No, probably not." -city of ashes

"This is an '81 honda! How dare you!" -vince, employee of the month

Mullroy: "I think he's telling the truth."
Murtogg: "If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us."
Jack Sparow: "Unless, of coarse, he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you." -pirates of the carribean

"M'kay." -mr mackey

Tori: "Where'd you leave him?"
Derek: "Passed out in an alley. Not sure where though..." -the awakening

Peter: "HEY! Hey hey, hey, hey... hey. Stop it."
Unnamed Character: "Okay..." -family guy

"The kids don't like it when Mommy and Daddy fight." -abby, NCIS

"Goddammit, Butters..." -various characters from south park

Simon: "Real men are terse. Laconic.
Clary: "So the more manly you are, the less you say?"
Simon: "Right. That's why when major badasses greet each other in movies, they don't say anything, the just nod. The nod means, 'I am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass,' but they don't say anything because they're Wolverine and Magneto and it would mess up their vibe to explain." -city of bones

"But Mooooooooom!" -cartman, south park

"Tax returns 1997!" -dane cook

Special Agent Smith: "Is he your boyfriend?"
Jess: "Not yet. But he will be."
Special Agent Smith: "Really? When?"
Jess: "When I turn eighteen. Or when he is no longer able to resist the overwhelming attraction he feels for me and jumps my bones. Whichever comes first." -code name cassandra

"Who's to call off said terrible beastie?" -jack sparow, pirates of the carribean

Magnus: "Is he dead? He looks dead."
Maryse: "No. He's not dead."
Magnus: "Have you checked? I could kick him if you want." -city of ashes

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." -sadam, south park

"Shake and Bake!" -ricky bobby, talledaga nights

Phil: "You're not really wearing that, are you?"
Alan: "Wearing what?"
Phil: "The man purse. You actually gonna wear that or are you just fuckin' with me?"
Alan: "It's where I keep all my things. Get a lot of compliments on this. Plus, it's not a purse, it's called a satchel. Indiana Jones wears one.
Phil: "So does Joy Behar..." -the hangover :)

"Pee pee touch?" -salim, you dont mess with the zohan

"Aw, are you gonna rape us?" -butters, south park

Jill: "So you actually wrote that one girl looked like she was 'hurtin for a squirtin'?"
Andy: "Mmm-hmm... yeah, 'hurtin for a squirtin'. Yeah, I wrote that."
Jill: "Oh, so you wrote, 'ho fo sho'."
Andy: "Yeah, I remember that girl. She was a ho... for sho." -40 year old virgin

"You should keep your ho on a leash. Bitch's running wild, man." -andy, 40 year old virgin

Trevor: "I know there's a part of you that wonders what it would be like."
Raven: "I already know. The cheerleaders have it written on the bathroom walls." -royal blood (vampire kisses #6)

"Oh, yeah!" -kool-aid man

"I thought he looked better." -chloe, the awakening :)

Hater: -in video- "Whoo! We're all gonna get laid!"
Judge: "Was... was that you, cue ball?"
Hater: "I... didn't have my glasses on..." -what happens in vegas

"Oh good, the itchy kind, my favorite. Does this one also have small pox?" -maxwell smart, get smart

Jess: "Jill?"
Special Agent Smith: "Yes, Jess?"
Jess: "Are you a lesbian?" -code name cassandra

Max: "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
Cheif: "I don't know. Were you thinking, 'Holy shit, holy shit, a swordfish almost went through my head'? If so, then yes." -get smart

"Darkness does not always equate to evil, just as light does not always bring good." -Goddess Nyx, marked

Tex: "Please, please! I don't want to die!"
Sita: "Then you should have never been born." -thirst, red dice

"Tigers love pepper. They hate cinnamon." -alan, the hangover

Simon: "So. Looks like you and Derek are getting along again. What happened? Did he give you the look?"
Chloe: "Look?"
Simon: "You know. The one that makes him look like a whipped puppy, and makes you feel like a jerk for doing the whipping."
Chloe: "Ah, that one. So it works on you, too?"
Simon: "It even works on Dad. We give in, we tell him it's okay, and the next thing you know, he's chewing up slippers again." -the reckoning :)

-From Life-

"Stupid bull dog!" -charis, not talking about actual bull dogs :)

"Penis..." -eyes dart around room- -brennan

Random Girl In School Hallway: "Jaaaaaaaaarreeeeeed!"
Jacob: "Peeeeeeeeenniiiiiis!" -LMHS

Nick: "Love you."
Me: "Oh, yeah? Well, I hate you! I hope you die tomorrow!"
Nick: "Oh, yeah? Well, I hope you get hit by a bus, today!"
Me: "Oh, yeah? Well, I hope that when you die tomorrow, it's from millions of ruptured brain vessels that rupture today so that your in complete agony the entire time the doctors are trying to fix you. But guess what? They can't. So you suffer while they try all throughout the night and into tomorrow until, finally, you give in and die."
Nick: "Oh, yeah? Well, I hope that you get kidnapped by Jigsaw, and then he-"
Me: "Nope. You can't do that. You already said I was going to die from a bus. Changing it would be cheating."
Nick: "Aw, damn..." -brother/sister fighting

"Brooke, if you don't stop whining I will put you back in the oven! I swear to God, I'll do it!" -brennan

"That's what she said." -various characters in my life

"Not all of us have photographic memories with subtitles. Regardless of whether or not they're in Swahili." -christy