some random and pointless facts about me

Gender: Female

Age: Somewhere Between 1 and 99

Where I live: Why would I tell you?

Name:none of the names in any of my fanfictions :P

Updates: no update pattern whatsoever, it could take me a day to update, could take me months, depends on how often I can write... I will NEVER discontinue a story unless I really lose interest (not likely) and if I do that then I will say so in the summary - hiatus yes - discontinue no - get it? good

Writers- all of them, from famous authors to subtle FF writers- ALL depend on the feedback from our readers. Vision Dominican brought up an interesting albeit tragically true idea:

"Lack of reviews is the greatest killer of fan fic writers out there. We at the institute wish to let the public know of how they can pitch in to save our dying writers.

1) Drop a review every other chapter. It may not seem like much, but reviews are actually what many of us want to see. That, and hits. Hits do make us happy but we don't really know if people like our story or not.

2) Visit our author page. Those kind of hits really make us happy. It's where we showcase our entourage of friends, beta readers, and stories. Some of us even tidy up with set areas for upcoming story ideas and character bios.

3) Send an email. While normally I'd prefer a review, emails are just as good. Really, it warms my heart to communicate with another reader or writer."

What you call being "too lazy to review" is what we call "a flame to the pages" as the writers. That one minute or two that you felt "too lazy" to review is another minute of creeping discouragement that all writers feel as they begin to think...

"Why am I even here…?"

"What's even the point of continuing?"

"My skills must be terrible…no one cares for my story…"

"I'll never be a good writer...I quit."

These are only a few thoughts that go through every writer's head- that go through MY head- when we put out a chapter / story with all our heart and soul within, and we sit there…and sit…and wait…and not a single person says even a word. If you're not a writer, you have NO IDEA how much that hurts…If you ARE a writer, then I'm sure you know just how great it feels when someone is kind enough to leave a heartwarming and encouraging review, and you read it, smiling while thinking…"Wow…I did it…"

So, why not give fellow writers the same luxury here?

Too many times I've seen epic and utterly beautiful works of literary art fall to pieces before finally being abandoned due to the terrible discouragement that the lack of reviews can cause. Sometimes, it is so severe that the very writer himself decides to quit, denying the world his skills of writing that I'm sure it would have deeply enjoyed.

Just one minute, that's all it takes. Just a few gentle taps of the fingers on your keyboard, a few seconds or so of your time, and your wordscan SAVE a writer from a dark demise.

Do me a favor: Go find a story, ANY story, anywhere here on Fanfiction.net, and see if you can help it. If it has very little / no reviews at all, just check it out, and say whatever comes to mind.And enjoy the thought in mind that you could have just SAVED that story, with just a few taps of the keyboard…If you agree with what I have said then please copy and paste any part of this story you wish onto your profile. Modify it in any way you see fit;there is no need to use my exact words. You make it say what you want it to say.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself.

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else.

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine.

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

You have strange nicknames and can tell a detailed story about how you got them.

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

Best Quotes Ever:

-Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

-It doesn't matter whether the glass is half empty or half full,just drink it and get it over with.

- Silence is golden, and duck tape is silver

-There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & and those that cant.

-When life gives you lemons, squirt them in life's eyes and run far away

-Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive, anyway

-I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me

-You don't write because you want to say something, you write because you have something to say.

-The act of writing is the act of discovering what you believe.

-Asking a writer what he thinks about criticism is like asking a lamppost what it thinks about dogs.

-My friends are the type of people who would try to drown a fish, but I love them anyway.

-Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."

-The buddy system is essential to survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.

-SARCASM is just another free service I offer.

-I like you. When the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless.

-I'm not ALWAYS late. Sometimes I just don't show up.

-You're not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately.

-A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.

-Education is important; school however, is another matter.

-Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them more

-My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in alumnium foil

-An apple a day keeps the doctor away; if well aimed

-I'm on a diet. I only eat chocolate on days that end with a ' y '

-When life gives you lemons, throw them at all the haters out there!

- Villains are only victims whose stories hasn't been told. Forgive them, unless they are crazed-up-fruitloops that already had their chance!

-You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a cliff, I laugh even harder because you trusted me

- "Immature" is just a word that people use when they're jealous of the fun you're having

-I almost always hate school because I have to get up at 6:00am!

-What if the problems we work on in school are real life... and solving them saves the world?

-It gets better... unless it doesn't.

-I DON'T NEED EASY I JUST NEED POSSIBLE! (kim possible! :)

-We're family; we're disfunctional, and we all hate each other in some way.

-I may stutter, I may be clumsy, I may be late, and I may not succeed, but at least I'm not alone.

-You may be older than me by mere months, but when I'm 99 and you're dead, who will be laughing then?

-'Humor is what makes you human' does not apply to cartoons.

-The screw-up fairy visits us often.

-One cat leads to another cat to another cat to another cat...

-I'm too old to rage against the system. I just whine at it.

-If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher.

-War is God's way of teaching Americans about geography.

-Basic Definitions of Science: If it's green or wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.

-Those who fail history class are doomed to repeat it.

-The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.

-Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.

-People who say it can't be done should not interrupt those of us who are doing it.

-Cats know more than they let on.

-Beginning a sentence, "Now, don't get angry..." will always have the reverse effect.

-If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is NOT for you!

-When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

-I'm right 90 percent of the time, so why worry about the other 3?

-Warning: jumping into radioactive waste does not give you super powers!

-Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.

-It’s not the pace of life that concerns me, it’s the sudden stop at the end.

-What do we want? TIME TRAVEL! When do we want it? DOESN'T MATTER!

-You can use both idiots and scissors, but you can't let an idiot use scissors. (Sebastian Michaelis)

-A baby first laughs at the age of four weeks. By that time, his eyes focus well enough to see you clearly.

-Dream big dreams, because little dreams have no magic.

-Ooooo...a life. Where can I download one?

-I apologize, do you want me to mean it too?

-I can only please on person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either.

-Don't follow in my footsteps; I tend to walk into walls.

-Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

-A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

-There are no stupid questions, just stupid people who ask questions.

-I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

-I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS!

-Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

-Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.- Oscar Wilde

-One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

-Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

-Be a loser! Because being cool is so overrated!

-It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why would I keep looking after I found it?

-They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

-Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that they're not out to get you.

-Don't worry about the world ending today... it's already tomorrow in Australia.

-Character is what you are. Reputation is what people think you are.

-Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

-Girls can do anything boys can do, and we can do it in high heels.

-Brilliant brunette with many blonde moments.

-Everyday I believe that humans could not get any stupider, and everyday I am proven horribly wrong

-"I am sick of people having a near death experience and saying they saw the light. You know what the paramedics do when they first arrive? THEY SHINE A LIGHT IN YOUR EYE! That's not GOD…it's a MAGLIGHT!" Tony V.

-Fake is the new trend. I guess everyone's in style.

-So what I've got a smile on, but it's hiding the quiet superstitions in my head.

-Yes I may be smiling, but I'm secretly laughing at your face.

-I didn't say that it was your fault…I said I was going to blame you.

-I'm the person your mother warned you about.

-I stopped fighting with my inner demons. We're on the same side now.

-OMG! THE RAIN'S WET! -I'm not AD--Ooh, look, a butterfly!

-ADOST: Attention Deficit-Ohh Shiny Thing.

-God made men first, then he had a better idea!

-Nope, can't go to Hell. Satan still has that restraining order against me...

-I reject your reality and substitute my own.

-Women are angels. When someone breaks our wings, we continue flying...on broomsticks.

-I'm probably the coolest dork you'll ever meet.

-I'm cute...now give me my cookies.

-Boys in books are just...Better!

-It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces.

-You couldn't handle me...even in your wildest dreams.

-ADHD writer: Once upon a -- no...There was once a -- no...THE END! .

-You know you're a geek when procrastination doesn't affect your grades.

-I have nothing against God, it's his fan club I can't stand!

-I didn't mean to hurt your feelings...I was aiming for your face.

-It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.

-This calls for a particularly subtle blend of psychology and extreme violence.

-If you have noticed this notice you will have noticed that this notice is not worth noticing.

-I hear voices, and they don't like you.

-Do not disturb I'm disturbed enough already

-Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldn't they be more specific and say "employees of this place only"?

-Krillen: great what else could go wrong?

Piccollo: you could make me angry, but I don't recommend it

-No I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me

-Warning: Trespassers will be shot, Survivors will be shot again.

-Pain is a good thing. It lets you know you're still alive.

-I do whatever the voices in my head tell me to do!

-Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.

-Be the kind of person that when your feet touch the ground in the morning the devil says, "shit she's up"

-You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

-I HATE IT WHEN THE LITTLE VOICES ARGUE WITH MY IMAGINARY FRIENDS!

-LIFE IS LIKE A MOVIE: If you are sad: drama. If you are afraid: suspense. If you are angry: action.

-A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

-Life was so simple when boys had cooties

-I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

-I'm the kind of girl who would fall flat on my face, get up, laugh my head off, and say " That was fun!

-My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it’s gone.

-Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it

-“Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.”

-Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.

-Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity?

-Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper.

-The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen!

-Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.

-I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

-Don’t follow me, I’m lost too.

-This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.

-Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas.

-WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.

-I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do kill me?

-Life sucks and then you die.

-I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

-When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.

-“When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade”

-It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

-The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.

-So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun.

-When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

-Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

-If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

-Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”?

-If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

-Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’?

-Why isn’t chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are a vegetable?

-Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

-Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

-Why do people say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”? Why would someone get cake if they can’t eat it?

-Don’t mess with me I’ve got a stick.

-I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

-I ran with scissors, and lived!

-I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

-Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later.

-One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons!

-A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

-I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

-Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.” Suicide is Human’s way of saying “You can’t fire me- I quit!”

-“He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.”

-“If you know me, chances are you hate me.”

-Shut up voices or I’ll poke you with a fork

-If at first you don’t succeed skydiving isn’t for you.

-Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them.

-Set sail in a general that way direction.

-It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it?

-I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later.

-Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in your face?

-All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

-When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

-Education is important, school however, is another matter.

-Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go.

-The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

-"I know water doesn't bite! What a stupid thing to say! Water doesn't have to bite you! You drown in it you moron!" -Stewie Griffin

-"You know, I do not think that means what you think it means." Inigo Montoyez

-Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day but set the man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

-It's all fun and games until the other person loses their mind

-Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.

-Don't hate yourself in the morning-sleep till noon.

-You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

-I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

-I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

-I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

-We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.

-War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

-Excuse me. Have you seen my mind? I think I've lost it...

-I don't obsess! I think intensely.

-Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?

-Apparently 1 in 5 people are Chinese; there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or dad, or my older brother Collin, or my younger brother Ho-chan-chu, but I think its Colin.

-Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'

-It is wise to walk a mile in a man's shoes before judging him... That way you're a mile away and you have his shoes.

-"If you are good you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good you will get out of it."

-"What happens if you get scared half to death twice?"

-"A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking."

-"Sometimes you're the windshield, but sometimes you gotta be the bug."

-"I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear into my crib."

-"Always listen to experts- they'll tell you confidently what can't be done and why. Then go ahead and do it."

-"After all is said and done a heck of a lot more is said than done."

-"At my lemonade stand I used to give away the first glass for free, and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote."

-"Happiness is your dentist telling you "it won't hurt a bit," and then he catches his hand in the drill."

-"The good news is that you may have screwed up my past and created my present but you have no control over my future."

-Let's play truth or dare! Or maybe just dare, because nobody seems to tell the truth anymore.

-"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."

-There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

-Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

-If you can't convince them, confuse them.

-If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

-Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

-Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

-How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

-Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.

-I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.

-You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

-When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

-Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional.

-I'm not random, you just can't think as fast as me.

-Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz

When you look at the mirror: horror. Now you are smiling: that's comedy!

-DO NOT INTERRUPT ME WHEN I AM TALKING TO MYSELF!

-Break the rules. Stand apart. Ignore your head. Follow your heart.

-I'm not random, you just can't think as fast as I- GUMMYBEARS!

-DRINK COFFEE! DO DUMB THINGS FASTER WITH MORE ENERGY!

-NEVER go to bed angry. Stay awake and plot your revenge.

-I'm not deaf. I'm just ignoring you.

-I'm here because Heaven wouldn't take me, and Hell was afraid I'd take over.

-I'M SPECIAL AND I KNOW IT! THEY GIVE ME MEDS TO KEEP ME FROM SHOWIN' IT!

-Do not interrupt me when I'm concocting evil schemes or I will bite you.

-I've told them a hundred times--don't touch the whatchamacallit because it will make the doohickey not work with the thingamabob!

-When life gives you lemons throw them back and demand candy

-I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

-I make the cowardly lion look like the terminator!

-I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard.

-I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

-One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

-Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

-Don't ever, ever, EVER!!! Touch a crazy woman's pudding!!! I will STAB YOU WITH A SPOON!

-People that know me think I'm odd. My friends think I'm weird. But, my BEST friends KNOW I'm a complete psycho path!

-So what if we act like imature idiots? We're having fun.

-When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, then laugh while people try to figure out what the heck you did.

-"God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made woman." - Adela Rodgers St. Johns

-A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

-Of course I'm talking to myself. Who else can I trust?

-If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

-parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, then the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

-I'm not on a sugar high... I'M NATURALLY HYPER!

-"They're not what we think they are."

"What are you gonna do about it?"

"Probably somethin' stupid."

-most people, when put into a dangerous situation have to main responses, fight or flight- me, I have fight, flight, or do something incredibly stupid

-To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.

-I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

-Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

-I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly.

-Sparkly, shiny rocks and gems are my weakness. O-O

-Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in your face?!

-The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.

-"The problem's not the problem, it's your attitude towards the problem. Savvy?" -Captain Jack Sparrow

-Joe Kido: Will you please stop taunting the deranged android!

-Terriermon: Moumentai!

Henry Wong: Oh, go moumentai yourself!

-Kitty: So the minute we have a fight, you go to the human world and flirt with some meaningless human girls?

Johnny: Come on Kitty. You know your the only meaningless girl for me! Wait... that didn't come out right.

-Shaggy: We're gonna die!

Daphne: Think positively.

Shaggy: We're gonna die quickly!

-Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?

Woman: No, but I scraped my knee crawling out of Hell.

-"Don't argue with a stupid person- they'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." -Mark Twain

--"Nothing that is worth knowing can be taught." -Oscar Wilde

--"He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand in rapture is as good as dead. His eyes are close." -Albert E.

--The secret of life, though, is to fall seven times and to get up eight times. -Paulo Coelho

Her hair was up in a ponytail
Her favorite dress tied with a bow
Today was Daddy's Day at school
And she couldn't wait to go.
But her mommy tried to tell her,
That she probably should stay home.
Why the kids might not understand,
If she went to school alone.
But she was not afraid;
She knew just what to say.
What to tell her classmates
Of why he wasn't there today.
But still her mother worried,
For her to face this day alone.
And that was why once again,
She tried to keep her daughter home.
But the little girl went to school,
Eager to tell them all.
About a dad she never sees,
A dad who never calls.
There were daddies along the wall in back,
For everyone to meet
Children squirming impatiently,
Anxious in their seats.
One by one the teacher called,
Each student from the class.
To introduce their daddy,
As seconds slowly passed.
At last the teacher called her name,
Every child turned to stare.
Each of them was searching,
For a man who wasn't there.
"Where's her daddy at?"
She heard a boy call out.
"She probably doesn't have one"
Another student dared to shout.
And from somewhere near the back,
She heard a daddy say,
"Looks like another deadbeat dad,
Too busy to waste his day."
The words did not offend her,
As she smiled up at her mom.
And looked back at her teacher,
Who told her to go on.
And with hands behind her back,
Slowly she began to speak.
And out from the mouth of a child,
Came words incredibly unique.
"My daddy couldn't be here,
Because he lives so far away.
But I know he wishes he could be,
Since this is such a special day.
And though you cannot meet him,
I wanted you to know.
All about my daddy,
And how much he loves me so.
He loved to tell me stories
He taught me to ride my bike.
He surprised me with pink roses,
And taught me to fly a kite.
We used to share fudge sundaes,
and ice cream in a cone.
And though you cannot see him,
I'm not standing here alone.
Cause my daddy's always with me
Even though we are apart.
I know because he told me,
He'll forever be in my heart."
With that, her little hand reached up,
and lay across her chest.
Feeling her own heartbeat,
Beneath her favorite dress.
And from somewhere in the crowd of dads,
Her mother stood in tears.
Proudly watching her daughter,
Who was wise beyond her years.
For she stood up for the love
Of a man not in her life.
Doing what was best for her,
Doing what was right.
And when she dropped her hand back down,
Staring straight into the crowd.
She finished with a voice so soft,
But its message clear and loud.
"I love my daddy very much,
He's my shining star.
And if he could he'd be here,
But heaven's just too far.
You see he was a fireman
And died just this past year.
When airplanes hit the towers
And taught Americans to fear.
But sometimes when I close my eyes,
It's like he never went away."
And then she closes her eyes,
And saw him there that day.
And to her mother's amazement,
She witnessed with surprise.
A room full of daddies and children,
All starting to close their eyes.
Who knows what they saw before them,
Who knows what they felt inside.
Perhaps for merely a second,
They saw him at her side.
"I know you're with me Daddy."
To the silence she called out.
And what happened next made believers,
Of those once filled with doubt.
Not one in that room could explain it,
For each of their eyes had been closed.
But there on the desk beside her,
Was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.
And a child was blessed, if only for a moment,
By the love of her shining bright star.
And given the gift of believing,
That heaven is never too far.

-20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.

Re-post this and spread the stupidity!

Fandom is focus.
Fandom is obsession.
Fandom is insatiable consumption.
Fandom is sitting for hours in front of a TV screen a movie screen a computer screen with a comic book a novel on your lap.
Fandom is eyestrain and carpal tunnel syndrome and not enough exercise and staying up way, way past your bedtime.
Fandom is people you don’t tell your mother you’re meeting.
Fandom is people in the closet, people out and proud, people in costumes, people in T-shirts with slogans only fifty others would understand.
Fandom is a loud dinner conversation scaring the waiter and every table nearby.
Fandom is you in Germany and me in the US and him in Australia and her in Japan.
Fandom is a sofabed in New York, a road-trip to Oxnard, a friend behind a face in London.
Fandom talks past time-zones and accents and backgrounds.
Fandom is conversation. Communication. Contact.
Fandom is drama.
Fandom is melodrama.
Fandom is high school.
Fandom is Snacky’s law and Godwin’s law and Murphy’s law.
Fandom is smarter than you.
Fandom is stupider than you.
Fandom is five arguments over and over and over again.
Fandom is the first time you’ve ever had them.
Fandom is female and fandom is male.
Fandom lets female play at being male.
Fandom bends gender, straight, gay, whatever.
Fandom is fantasy.
Fandom doesn't care about norms or taboos or boundaries.
Fandom cares too much about norms and taboos and boundaries.
Fandom is not real life. Fandom is closer than real life.
Fandom is shipping, never shipping, het, slash, gen, none of the above, more than the above.
Fandom is love for characters you didn’t create.
Fandom is recreating the characters you didn’t create.
Fandom is appropriation, subversion, dissention.
Fandom is adoration, extrapolation, imitation.
Fandom is dissection, criticism, interpretation.
Fandom is changing, experimenting, attempting.
Fandom is creating.
Fandom is drawing,painting, vidding: nine seasons in four minutes of love.
Fandom is words, language, authoring.
Fandom is essays, stories, betas, parodies, filks, zines, usenet posts, blog posts, message board posts, emails, chats, petitions, wank, concrit, feedback, recs.
Fandom is writing for the first time since you were twelve.
Fandom is finally calling yourself a writer.
Fandom is signal and response.
Fandom is a stranger moving you to tears, anger, laughter.
Fandom is you moving a stranger to speak.
Fandom is distraction.
Fandom is endangering your job, your grades, your relationships, your bank account.
Fandom gets no work done.
Fandom is too much work.
Fandom was/is just a phase.
Fandom could never be just a phase.
Fandom is where you found a friend, a sister, a kindred spirit.
Fandom is where you found a talent, a love, a reason.
Fandom is where you found yourself."

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is? If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
So what's the speed of dark? How come abbreviated is such a long word? Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag? A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops. On my desk, I have a work station...so how come I have to work Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans? Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men? How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there? If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?

"Try Not To Cry"- Seriously, if your eyes don't at least get a little misty when you read this you have a problem.

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

So, Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry and remember how blessed they truly are,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as "Try Not To Cry"

2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how cold-hearted you really are...

On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?)Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (hmm.. something must have gotten lost in the translation..)

On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands (Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.

On a can of cashews: Warning: May contain cashews. (Really? I never would have guessed!)

if this has you wondering where we became sooooo stupid paste this to your profile.

Her name was Auroura

She was only five

This is what happened

When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk

Her mom was an addict

Her parents kept her

Locked in an attic

Her only friend was a little toy bear

It was old and worn out

And had patches of hair

She always talked to it

When no one's around

She lays there and hugs it

Not a peep of sound

Until her parents

unlock the door

Some more and more pain

She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg

A scar on her face

Why would she be

In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear

And softly cry's

She loves her parents

But they want her to die

She sits in the corner

Quiet but thinking, "God, why? Why is

My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life

For a sad little kid

She'd get beaten and beaten

For anything she did

Then one night

Her mom came home high

The poor child was hit and slapped

As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly

Grabbed for a blade

It was sharp and pointy

One that she made

She thrust the blade

Right in her chest,

"You deserve to die

You worthless pest!"

The mom walked out

Leaving the girl slowly dying

She grabbed her bear

And again started crying

Police showed up

At the small little house

They quickly barged in

Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly

Opened a door

To find the sad little girl

Lying on the floor

It must have been bad

To go through so much harm

But at least she died

With her best friend in her arms

If you hate child abuse then repost this on your profile.

Stupid laws the laws and the side comments (especially those!) are completely hilarious.

In New York-

it is against the law to throw a ball at someone’s head for fun. (Dang it!)

Citizens may not greet each other by “putting one’s thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers”. (But, but, but-)

Slippers are not to be worn after 10:00 PM. (Why is that illegal?)

In Florida-

Doors of all public buildings must open outwards. (What if someone is walking toward you and you hit them with the door?)

It is illegal to sell your children. (Well, I would hope so!)

Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. (Uh...)

A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing. (What is the point of this?)

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. (Who would own and elephant in Florida...?)

It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. (Aw man! Good-bye bikini karaoke night.)

In Georgia-

Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs. (Okay...)

Signs are required to be written in English. (What if someone's foreign?)

No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday. (So, any other day they can?)

in South Dakota-

No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. (No comment needed...)

It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory. (But, it smeels so soothing!)

In Tennessee-

It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket. (I don't have pockets.)

No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk. (Do you mean 'off the sidewalk'? Cause that would make a lot more sense.)

Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians. (I take that as offensive!)

It’s illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM. (Do the frogs know that?)

In Missouri-

Frightening a baby is in violation of the law. (Too late.)

It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants. (A drunk elephant? Now THAT I gotta see!)

Dancing is strictly prohibited. (How can you take away dancing!?)

It’s illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket. (Why a bucket?)

A milk man may not run while on duty. (Now, Travis, what-ever you do, do NOT run while giving people their milk.)

In Idaho-

Illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds. (That's a whole lot of candy!)

You may not fish on a camel’s back. (Why would anyone try even try that?)

Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime. (0_o)

Residents may not fish from a giraffe’s back. (Whats with animals and fishing?)

In Indiana-

The value of Pi is 3. (What does that have to do with ANYTHING?)

Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March. (I can still take a shower...right?)

It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette. (What idiotic man made that rule?)

No one may throw an old computer across the street at their neighbor. (Did that happen a lot?)

In Alaska-

Clowns beware! (WTH?)

In Kansas-

If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed. (Ya know that neither means that they'd be stuck their for God know how long, right?)

Hitting a vending machine that stole your money is illegal. (Why? It's not like the vending machine feels it.)

No one may wear a bee in their hat. (Why would they want to?)

No one may sing the alphabet on the streets at night. (Poo.)

Just some evidence that the human race is doomed:

On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping". (Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap". (And that would be how?)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost". (But, it's just a suggestion).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down". (Too late! You lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating". (And you thought... what?...)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body". (But wouldn't that save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication". (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness". (...thanks for the warning?)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only". (As opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:"Not to be used for the other use". (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts". ("WHAT" spits nuts out and looks at them weird "no wonder they didnt taste like pinapples)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts". (aww, but i was going to throw them at people)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (while running of a cliff "WAIT! WHAT?!)

On a box of Legos: "Some assembly required." (...What?)

Kids Are Quick - ( I love these kids!)

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now,Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his hand.

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher

Murphy's 15 Other Laws...

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

3. He who laughs last thinks the slowest.

4. A day without sunshine is like. . . well, night.

5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 percent probability you'll get it wrong.

9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.

12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

14. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in the dark.

15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

One sunny day,
In the middle of the night,
Two dead boys began to fight,
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other,
the deaf policeman heard the noise,
came and shot the two dead boys,
If you don't believe this lie is true,
Ask the blind man he saw it too.

A drunk man in an Oldsmobile

They said had run the light

That caused the six-car pileup

On 109 that night.

When broken bodies lay about

'And blood was everywhere,'

'The sirens screamed out eulogies,'

For death was in the air.

'A mother, trapped inside her car,'

Was heard above the noise;

Her plaintive plea near split the air:

'Oh, God, please spare my boys!'

She fought to loose her pinned hands;

'She struggled to get free,'

But mangled metal held her fast

In grim captivity.

Her frightened eyes then focused

'On where the back seat once had been,'

But all she saw was broken glass and

Two children's seats crushed in.

Her twins were nowhere to be seen;

'She did not hear them cry, '

'And then she prayed they'd been thrown free, '

'Oh, God, don't let them die! '

Then firemen came and cut her loose,

'But when they searched the back, '

'They found therein no little boys, '

But the seat belts were intact.

They thought the woman had gone mad

'And was traveling alone, '

'But when they turned to question her, '

They discovered she was gone.

Policemen saw her running wild

And screaming above the noise

'In beseeching supplication, '

Please help me find my boys!

They're four years old and wear blue shirts;

'Their jeans are blue to match.''

'One cop spoke up, ''They're in my car, '

And they don't have a scratch.

They said their daddy put them there

'And gave them each a cone, '

Then told them both to wait for Mom

To come and take them home.

'I've searched the area high and low, '

But I can't find their dad.

'He must have fled the scene, '

'I guess, and that is very bad.'

'The mother hugged the twins and said, '

'While wiping at a tear, '

'He could not flee the scene, you see, '

'For he's been dead a year.'

'The cop just looked confused and asked, '

'Now, how can that be true? '

'The boys said, ''Mommy, Daddy came '

'And left a kiss for you.'' '

He told us not to worry

'And that you would be all right, '

And then he put us in this car with

'The pretty, flashing light. '

'We wanted him to stay with us, '

'Because we miss him so, '

'But Mommy, he just hugged us tight '

And said he had to go.

He said someday we'd understand

'And told us not to fuss, '

'And he said to tell you, Mommy, '

'He's watching over us.'

The mother knew without a doubt

'That what they spoke was true, '

'For she recalled their dad's last words, ' ' I will watch over you.'

This message works on the day you receive it.

Let us see if it is true.

ANGELS EXIST but some times, since they don't all have wings, we call them FRIENDS.

Pass this on to your true friends.

Something good will happen to you at 11:11 in the evening; something that you have been waiting to hear.

Do not break this prayer

-Friends & Best Friends

Friend: Will bail me out of jail
Best friend: Would be in the room next to me saying, THAT WAS AWESOME , LETS DO IT AGAIN!!

Friend: Will comfort me when he breaks up with me
Best friend: Will call him, whispering "Seven days..."

Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Best Friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance

Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Best Friend: Won't let me go away

Friend: Will help me up when I fall down
Best Friend: Will point and laugh because she tripped me

Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me

Friend: Will comfort me when he breaks my heart
Best Friend: Will help me plot my revenge and get with his best friend

Friend: Calls your parents by Mr. and Mrs.
Best friend: Calls your parents dad and mom.

Friend: Has never seen you cry
Best Friend: Has always had the best shoulder to cry on

Friend: Never asks for anything to eat or drink
Best friend: Opens the fridge and makes herself at home

Friend: Asks you to write down your number.
Best friend : They ask you for their number (cuz they can't remember it)

Friend: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back
Best friend: Has a closet full of your stuff

Friend: Only knows a few things about you
Best friend: Could write a very embarassing biography on your life

Friend: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Best friend: Will always go with you

Friend: Will help you find your prince.
Best friend: Will kidnap him and brings him to you.

Friend: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
Best friend: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

Friend: Will offer you a soda.
Best friend: Will dump theirs on you.

Friend: Will give you their umbrella in the rain.
Best friend: Will take yours and say, "Run - beep - run!"

Friend: Will help you move.
Best friend: Will help you move the bodies.

Friend: Will console you when you house catches on fire.
Best friend: Will roast marshmallows and flirt with the firemen.

Friend: Would leave you if you were a criminal.
Best Friends: Are the ones you call in the middle of the night to tell them you killed someone and they would say "what we gonna do with the body??"

Friend: Will ask why you're crying.
Best friend: Will already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry.

Friend: Will tell you she knows how you feel.
Best friend: Will just sit down and cry.

Friend: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
Best friend: Will already know not to tell.

Friend: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
Best friend: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste!

Friend: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later
Best Friend: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad ... Here’s a tissue"

Friend: Will never ask for food.
Best friend: Is the reason you have no food.

Friend: Will knock on your front door.
Best friend: Will walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

Friend: Will say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
Best friend: Will not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

Friend: Will say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
Best friend: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

Friend: Only know a few things about you
Best Friend: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life

Friend: Hides me from the cops
Best Friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place

Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public
Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.

*looks in the mirror* yep, still a cat, I own nothing, Not Digimon not Danny Phantom Not Naruto Not any thing I may write about, Got it? good.