Praise for Golden Snowflake's Work

"You're grounded." -Golden Snowflake's fiancee

"I'd wank to this!" -Golden Snowflake's cousin

"What is this fixation with homosexual sex?" -Golden Snowflake's mom

I'm a girl paddling furiously against the current that sweeps us all toward cowardice, conformity, and acting your age. I stand for all things mundane and odd. I will someday rule the world, and if you do not read my stories before that time, you will be scrubbing dirty underwear for the remainder of your existence.

Likes: Kerli, cinnamon, Diet Coke, meteorology, glitter, Team Rocket, integrity, Keanu Reeves, mascara, popcorn, compasses, The X-Files, peach wine, Imagine Dragons, cats, keys, cartoons, tarot cards, Jack Spicer, America, salamanders, sexy villains, candles, Imogen Heap, astronomy, Breaking Bad, snow.

School was a living hell for me because kids ostracized and gossiped about me, and after suffering severe depression coupled with extreme anxiety and, consequently, being suicidal from late middle school through most of high school, I am just now learning to be happy and forgiving. It’s been a long, long road, and I am only now beginning to realize that the light at the end of the tunnel isn’t a myth.

I will never ever have kids – in a world like this it would be inhumane. I would never put an innocent child through what I’ve been through, ever, and I will never forget every sneer and every word against me, nor the faces of the people who saw me as nothing more than something to mock and ignore.

My sense of humor is extremely dry and sarcastic at times, but also nonsensical and irreverent.

I am a drifter. You will find me anywhere from the pop machines on Foodcourtia (sneaking free refills of Diet Poop) to the parks and museums of Townsville where I hope to catch a glimpse of the Professor and his girls from time to time. Sometimes I stay on an abandoned terra where nobody else lives, catching up on my reading and my art. It’s always an honor when Aerrow and the gang drop by to spend a day or two at the house. If you see me around, don’t be afraid to say hi – I’m extremely shy, but I really appreciate a friendly face once in a while.

(In an alternate dimension, I am a skinny blonde college student who is obsessed with her cats and is extremely socially handicapped.)

Though my stories are often very dark, I have pretty high morals. Because something appears in one of my fics doesn’t mean that I condone it. Remember, this is where I go to let off steam, whether it be wallowing in my ZADR immorality or venting my rage as the Storm Hawks slaughter the Cyclonian monsters who dare to prey on the innocent. I don’t mean my ratings lightly. T may be offensive and M will undoubtedly be adult or dark.

Updates are sporadic – if you want to keep track of me, check on Instagram where I update a bit more frequently or on Twitter where I most commonly hang out.

It’s such an honor to see the little notes in my inbox when you favorite or review a story. I want nothing more than for you to enjoy my insanity, so I cherish feedback. I’ll gladly take requests, and chatting with fellow geeks gives me the warm fluffies.

The only piece of advice you will ever need is this: you can spend your time wishing people were the way you imagine them and wishing the world was as you dream, or you can be the person you wish the world had and mold the world into what you most want. It’s the easiest and most rewarding choice you’ll ever make.

Integrity.Love.Unity.

I.L.U.

My deviantART Account: Chat-Mort

My AO3 Account: GoldenSnowflake

My Twitter Account: GoldenSnowflake

My Instagram Account: Chat_Mort

Because of M being the highest rating allowed on this site, a few stories or chapters of stories have been left out here and can be found on Archive Of Our Own (AO3). I’ll try to list them all so you’re not missing out.

Chapter 6 of Fire Eyes - the latter part of the chapter has a piece cut out.

Percentages - several of the oneshots/chapters in this collection are too explicit to fit into the M rating.

All cover art is my own.