UPDATE: Due to personal preferences and a lack of activity on this site, I will be moving over to ao3 within the next month or two. This account will then be permanently inactive. Note: some stories will not be moved and are discontinued! That includes all of my Maximum Ride works. For those following The World is Ahead, that story will be moved and continued on ao3. I'm sorry if this causes an inconveniences for anybody. Thank you to anyone who has been with me since the very beginning!

Hey. My name’s A$h, the Empress of Sarcasm. I’m a future Egyptologist/college professor/author. But for now I'll stick to being a C/SCPO (Cadet Senior Chief Petty Officer) for my NJROTC unit. I'm an extremely nerdy fangirl with a lot of feels who has lost the ability to can.

What’s your real name?

Why would I tell you that? Unless you know me (silent-ninja-twins and Crazy about books15 and Starriver92), then you have no reason to know my name.

Mood?

COMIC CON ;_;

Relationship status:

I have a perfect relationship with my bed and my fridge if that counts. But my alarm clock is a home-wrecking bitch because it's jealous of my bed being with me.

What’s your favorite band?

I don’t hold myself down to just one band. I prefer alternative/rock/punk/metal bands though.

Favorite composers?

Thomas Bergerson and Nick Phoenix (Two Steps From Hell), Howard Shore (Lord of the Rings), Hans Zimmer (Dark Knight Rises), James Newton Howard (Treasure Planet), and John Williams (Jaws, Star Wars, Harry Potter, Indiana Jones, etc.)

What’s your best quality?

My sarcastic, bitchy attitude. Don’t like it? Deal with it. My friends do.

What song are you listening to?

“Talkin' bout a Revolution" -Tracy Chapman

What’re your favorite books/series of books?

Harry Potter, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Song of the Sparrow, The Hunger Games Trilogy, Heroes of Olympus, Kane Chronicles, Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, To Kill A Mockingbird, Treasure Island, Divergent series, Cyrano de Bergerac, Animal Farm, Brave New World, Sherlock Holmes.

Do you go to school?

Duh. But it’s not like I like to.

What is your favorite subject?

History.

What is your least favorite subject?

Math.

Are you crushing on anyone?

Yeah I suppose so.

Who is your BFF?

Those five crazy mother fuckers I met last year and several people on Fanfiction. Plus my long-lost twin sister here on Fanfiction. :D

Are you politically correct?

I try, but it’s a pain in the ass... I mean butt.

Favorite comedian.

Bill Cosby, Chris D'Eliah, Jeff Dunham, and Gabriel Inglesias.

Favorite TV shows.

Avatar: The Last Airbender, An Idiot Abroad, One Upon a Time, Doctor Who, Teen Titans, Supernatural, Merlin, Legend of Korra, and Sherlock.

Best TV show of all time?

There's a lot.

Favorite authors.

Rick Riordan, John Green, Suzanne Collins, J.R.R. Tolkien, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, and J.K. Rowling.

All-time favorite movie?

There's a ton.

Best couples of all time.

1. John & Sherlock (Sherlock) 2. Nine/Ten & Rose (Doctor Who) 3. Dean & Castiel (Supernatural) 4. Ron & Hermione (Harry Potter) 5. Percy & Annabeth (Percy Jackson and the Olympians/Heroes of Olympus) 6. Finnick & Annie (The Hunger Games Trilogy) 7. Four & Tris (Divergent) 8. Zuko & Katara (Avatar: The Last Airbender) 9. Joe & Queen Clarisse (Princess Diaries) 10. Rory & Amy (Doctor Who) 11. The Doctor & the TARDIS (Doctor Who) 12. Faromir & Eowyn (The Lord of the Rings) 13. Kirk & Spock (Star Trek)

Worst couples of all time.

1. Jacob & Renesme (Twilight) 2. Gale & Katniss (The Hunger Games Trilogy) 3. Spock & Uhura (Star Trek) 4. Mikey & Martha (Doctor Who) 5. Irene & Sherlock (Sherlock)

Best song.

There’s a lot.

Funniest movie you’ve every seen.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

What movies kill you inside every time you see them?

The first Land Before Time, Toy Story 3, Titanic, The Hunger Games, and Act of Valor.

Who are your least favorite characters?

Everyone in Twilight (Except for Charlie.) and Anderson (Sherlock) (If you don't hate him get out of the fandom).

Favorite actors?

Jonny Depp, Benedict Cumberbatch, Robert Downey Jr., Tom Hiddleston, Martin Freeman, Viggo Mortenson, Orlando Bloom, David Tennant, Matt Smith, Christopher Eccleston, Jared Padelaki, Jensen Ackles, and Misha Collins.

Favorite actresses?

Anne Hathaway, Meryl Streep, Julie Andrews, and Jennifer Lawrence.

Here's the full summary of "The Maximum End."

After their escape from death in the streets of Paris, Maximum Ride and her flock find themselves close to the end of their long journey. And Fang and his gang of enhanced humans uncover a clue in the subway tunnels of New York City- one that could connect Fang's dark past with the Doomsday Group. And after nearly being killed by a tsunami, both groups realize something: the end is near. With the apocalypse approaching fast, Max disappears after a rescue of her half-sister. But why is she still haunting Fang's dreams? Soon everyone's secrets are revealed, and no one is just who they say they are. Everyone has an agenda, and no one can trust anybody- let alone each other. Soon it's a race against time to figure out who is behind the Doomsday Group and the dangerous, lingering question: Who is the One Light?

And this is the summary for part 2. Took me ages to come up with one that was perfect.

A year has passed since Max's tragic demise at the hands of the Doomsday Group. To Fang, it feels like just yesterday. Suffering in silence, he starts seeing her in his dreams... Dreams that hold the clues to the answers to every question. Fang (with the flock in tow) sets out to discover the answers and find out a question that burns him every moment of his life: is Max really alive like his dreams tell him? But their adventure soon turns into an all-out nightmare where they will have to fight for every inch of ground they cover. But an even bigger question looms ahead: who is the One Light?

News from the Keyboard

3 July 2013: Writer's block has been a real bitch lately. I'm honestly trying to work on The World is Ahead but the second chapter is difficult to write. In other news, the future sequels for The World is Ahead are under production as we speak. The next installment will be titled "Up in the Air" and the final installment will be called "Sang Real." MAXIMUM END, GREEK ANGELS, FLOCK ONESHOTS, AND TEN WAYS TO ANNOY ARE UNDER HIATUS. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO ADOPT GREEK ANGELS PLEASE MESSAGE ME.

6 July 2013: AND SO IT BEGINS. Chapter two of The World is Ahead is currently underway and making good progress. Expect an update after I get back from San Francisco on Wednesday. :D

15 July 2013: Chapter 3 of The World is Ahead is underway. Expect an update within the next few weeks.

21 July 2013: In response to my angst about not being at Comic Con, I've started writing a Superwholock fic. (Multi-chapter!) I don't know when I'll put it up, if ever. The World is a Ahead is still ongoing, so don't forget to leave your thoughts in the review section!