Hi Everyone! I'm Artemis and this is my profile! And just to let you guys know, I also have a Wattpad account and my username on that is "Iria-Artemis." Google me or whatever and you'll find me!

To those who are reading "The Assassin of Chaos", I will no longer be using this website to update. I will be using A03 to write the story. The link is:

http:///works/1818454/chapters/3904960

Guy: Where have you been all my life?
Girl: Hiding from you.
Guy: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Girl: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Guy: Is this seat empty?
Girl: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Guy: Your place or mine?
Girl: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Guy: So, what do you do for a living?
Girl: I'm a female impersonator.
Guy: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Girl: Do not enter.
Guy: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Girl: Unfertilized. Guy: Your body is like a temple.
Girl: Sorry, there are no services today.
Guy: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Girl: But would you stay there?
Guy : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Girl: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Girl: Really? 'Cause I'd put f and u together.

COPY PASTE THIS IF YOU WOULD SAY THIS TO A GUY

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call somebody. If you are weird like me and proud of it, copy and paste this to your profile.

A black man walks into a café one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black."

"But you sir..."

"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored."

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Copy and paste this onto your site and help stop racism!

19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. dont use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

If the majority of your free time is spent reading manga, watching anime, playing video games or writing fanfiction, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile.

Meanings of a kiss and a gesture

Kiss on the stomach = "I'm ready"
Kiss on the Forehead = "I hope we're together forever"
Kiss on the Ear = "You're my everything"
Kiss on the Cheek = "We're friends"
Kiss on the Hand = "I adore you"
Kiss on the Neck = "we belong together"
Kiss on the Shoulder = "I want you"
Kiss on the Lips = "I love you"

What the gesture means...

Holding Hands = "We definitely love each other"
Slap on the Butt = "That's mine"
Holding on tight = "I don't want to let go"
Looking into each other's Eyes = "I just plain love you"
Playing with Hair = "Tell me you love me"
Arms around the Waist = "I love you too much to let go"
Laughing while Kissing = "I am completely comfortable with you"
pPicking someone up off their feet = "That they love them fully and would do anything for them"

40 Things To Do In An Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside, and ask, "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in one corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to open the doors, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open by themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them all to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at every floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises whenever someone else presses a button.
10. Stare, grinning, at another person for a while, then say, "I have new socks on."
11.When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square with chalk on the floor then say to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug with the other passengers. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say that you're waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi, Greg. How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone bends to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend that you're a flight attendant, and review emergency exits with the other passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Yell, "Group hug!", then enforce it.
23. Make race car noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift as you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!", then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring--don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say, "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, then say, "Is that your final answer?"
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask people what floor they want. Whenever they answer, give them a glare and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"
33. Ask loudly, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell different people that you can see their aura.
35. When the door closes, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Start breathing heavily and grab your chest when someone walks in. Then stumble out gasping for air.
38. If you are the only one in the lift, press all the buttons then stand and stare at the door, waiting for someone to come in.
39. If someone looks at you, laugh maniacally and tell them that you're there for the mental health convention.
40. Dress up in a long black cloak with a hood, stare at everyone, and in a deep voice announce: "It is time..."

These are actual instruction labels from certain comsumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping
(But that's the only time I can do my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(Is this the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap
(And just exactly how do I do that?)
On some Swann TV dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost
(But it's just a suggestion...)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert:
(printed on bottom of box)
Do not turn upside down.
(A little late for that, don't you think?)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Really? Let's see!)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But I could save so much time! Wait, whose body exactly?)
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive or operate machinery.
(We could decrease the number of accidents if we don't let 5-year-olds on the bulldozers...)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness
(Isn't that the reason why I'm taking it?)
On Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
(I think something got lost in the translation.)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(Is there another place to put them?)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Wait, what's the other use? I wanna know!)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts
(Really? I thought it had cookies. -.-)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.
(What's the next step? Fly Delta?)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Shouldn't humans know this by now?)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garmet does not enable flight.
(You're really gonna destroy a childhood belief now? *shakes head*)

NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast

PJO FANS: will tell Zeus to make it rain

NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!

PJO FANS: say OH MY GODS!

NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings

PJO FANS: won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you!

PJO FANS: say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you!

NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid

PJO FANS: know that normal people are stupid

NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!

PJO FANS: when being chased use their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms

PJO FANS: yell at Zeus to calm the fuck down

NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation

PJO FANS: would try and find Camp Half Blood

NORMAL PEOPLE: don't have this on their profile

PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile!

I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson"

--IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... REPOST THIS--