...na no DA!

(and nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands)

One day I swear to God I'll write something good.

Until then you can all read my practice character sketches and screech at me for things like personal issues with punctuation, horrible OOCness, and the millions of "ands" that are. Freaking. EVERYWHERE. My only warning to you is that it takes me roughly thirty-three thousand six hundred and ninety-four years to crank out a new one-shot (God forbid I attempt to dedicate myself to a multi-chaptered piece...).

"If you pay us enough, we'll be willing to overlook the fact that the average Tic Tac has more intellect than you."

3.18.07

...okay, so maybe I am just sitting around and staring at people until they cough awkwardly and shift in their seats. Erm.

in production (aka no, I am not just sitting around and staring at people until they cough awkwardly and shift in their seats, unlike some people)

(in no particular order, either, though I will admit that swallowing suns is currently my baby and I love it very very much and that is probably why it is at the top.)

swallowing suns : KH2; axelroxas, dash of rikusora; the unlawful wedding of OOC and writing in something remotely resembling Faulknerese. May or may not become brainfuck. I am worried that no one will read this because they will ignore all semblances of literary devices and complain that Roxas is absolutely nothing like The Little Mermaid, whatthefuck, ohmygodyoustupidauthoressstopsniffingcoke, etc., despite it being very, very fun to write. Consistency can go screw itself.

full of grace : FF7; aerithcentric, cloudaerith-sorta; I don't know why I keep starting/writing all these things about Aerith. I don't even like her that much. Maybe it's the whole "I'm dead! ...or not!" thing between KH and FF7 or something. But I like the idea behind it. Of course, I don't expect that idea to last very long, considering how my plots often completely mutate during the "writing process" (read: banging my head on the keyboard and waiting for the words to type themselves and/or rearrange themselves into actual words from "juhu7ykkj_)jn+") (now you know why there are so many parentheses!) - but it's a good idea, nonetheless.

firework phoenix : FF7; a smattering of yuffentine; Gawd, where on earth did this come from?? As much as I love character deaths (they prevent me from writing romantic goop, and contribute an extra injection of angst as an added bonus), I never wanted Yuffie to die. But wow, this is coming along quite nicely - so nicely, in fact, that it gets to move up on the list - and I like the writing style in this one rather very much.

ouroboros : Naruto; sasukecentric, most-likely-pairingless; AUGH. AUGH. Why do I start fics when I have a thousand and three other ones in progress? Augh. Just... just augh. I don't know why I do this... anyway, while I (finally!) have made a title that I actually like, the story itself seems to be growing something that looks suspiciously like either plot or a cancerous tumor. Ohes noes. Well, I love Sasuke and I love his angst almost as much as I do him, so why wouldn't I write something about it? Inspired by the doujinshi "Snake".

twilight universe : KH2; possible axelroxas, larxenerinoa, general OrgXIII-shipping; I have no doubt that about thirty different angstybackstory!OrgXIII-fics are in production; however, that won't stop me me from adding my own into the mix. You can rest assured that some of my people will be angstier than theirs, anyway. Am working on Demyx, who is apparently now an ex-farmboy, Marluxia the ambitious boy prostitute, Larxene the bitchy lesbian gang leader (because LarxeneRinoa makes people's brains 'splode), Xigbar the not-pirate, and Saix the Sesshoumaru!nobleman; will soon start Zexion the closet-sadist and Vexen the unloved (because he is secretly Hojo Ver. 2.0). I am less than confident in my ability to tell stories that make sense, but for these, I shall try. I also don't know how I'm ever going to manage doing Xehanort/Xemnas - if his story ends up being last (after the decade it will take me to write all of these), it will be less because of dramatic effect and more because I like to run away from my problems.

resurrection : KH; yuffievincent, maybe-cloudaerith; I, for one, would like to know why the hell Aerith is still alive and it would be awesome to have glow-in-the-dark teeth. This is almost finished; I am debating whether to add another part or not.

dandelion wishing : KH; yuffievincent bits, leonyuffie-friendship, dashes of other shtuff; because little kids are fun to write and I'm ignoring the fact that Rikku showed up as a pixie-thing in KH2. Yuffie crashes planes, Aerith makes people's teeth rot in their mouths, Vincent explodes pudding cups with his eyes - the usual fluff. This is so light and happy that I feel completely out of my element when working on it (rarely a good sign, I'm told). A gen-Hollow Bastion fic.

the tragedy : FF7; yuffievincent, cidshera-on-the-side; little girls named Rufus rock my world and I don't quite know why Rocket Town is burning but it is. This could very easily turn into a post-KH fic, really. I cannot make myself consistent in this thing for my life, and the result will be that even I will not know whether Vincent Valentine is dead or alive. This title is so bad, it makes lesser mortals' appendices explode on the spot. It is a health hazard. One day, it will have a better title, I swear it.

watercolor : KH; aerithcloud-maybe; Aerith would also like to know why the hell Aerith is still alive and I don't know if Yuffie hates pink. She probably doesn't. Argh. The fact that Tifa's alive now screws everything over times a hundred. I think I'll just make it KH1-verse instead.

lotus : NANA; nanaren-somewhat; because I seem to see this depth in NANA that isn't actually there. This is what happens when you are an angsty teenager and you start making everything over-sentimental and melodramatic. It is great fun. I have turned Hachi into an angsty bundle of self-loathing and Nana into an equally angsty blob of desperate feminism. w00t.

translucence : xxxholic; maru-moro-centric; I had better finish this one fast before their past is actually revealed in the manga and my entire story becomes invalidated. Which will most likely happen very, very soon. Maru and Moro lose their souls and not one of my readers is surprised.

waiting : FF7; yuffie-centric; Yuffie doing a bit o' recreational "serious thinking" while she waits for some suckers to walk into her pine grove in the Junon forests. Expect it to be short, strange, and chock full of flashbacks. Angst levels may or may not be dangerously high. I'm iffy on this title, too.

checkmate : .hack//Roots, .hack//G.U.; haseoshino-if-you-want-it-to-be-there; mff, I'm still iffy on this title. Haseo on getting the short end of the stick and Atoli being squeaky because she is. Inspired by the quote "Don't go telling me crap like 'slow down'... not with Shino's face."

luna moth : Naruto; konohamaru-centric; no one has ever written anything for Konohamaru, ever. EVEEERRRRR.

blank : Naruto; sasunaru; it is practically mandatory that everyone write some ridiculous and cliche-ridden sobfest-story that ends in tragedy and/or madness, and while I had hoped that fic would be A Nameless Doll, my brain proved me wrong by cranking out this piece of garbage. I avoid working on it whenever possible. It is 93 percent done. I will probably never post it.

a moth romance : Princess Tutu; ahirufakia, ruemute implications; if you are going to get pissy about my incorrect romanizations then you can go to hell, rawr. I still don't quite know where this is going. All I know is that their kid is definitely named Siegfried and that I still haven't quite figured out how Fakia goes insane yet.

blood money : Naruto; vaguely-zabuzahaku; this was inspired by a very, very early memory of mine where I told someone that blood tastes like pennies even though I had never actually tasted a penny before. I don't know where this is going either.

the oldest testament : d.Gray-man; millenniumearl-centric; the Millennium Earl is my idol. I adore him. He is the best evil-master-puppeteer-of-everything ever. So I simply had to write this, I really did.

aces high : FF7; kid!yuffie and the quest for materia; this is only a summary and consists of about two sentences. That is very sad. But I think there will be stealing, ninjaness, and materia involved, yes. (Gee, who saw those coming?)

january third : FF7; yuffievincent-maybe; hesitation in the Crater and this is only a sentence longer than aces high. The worst part is that I doubt they even went to go kick Sephiroth's ass in January. They probably went in May or something. Argh. (But January Third makes for such a better title than May Twenty-Eighth or something, right? Right?)

psycho candy : d.Gray-man; rhode-centric; I don't even know what this fic is about. I only have a very vague and poetic-sounding summary and a title that was plagiarized from DOLL, which I constantly find myself stealing from anyway. Why am I talking about it?