Once upon a time, there was a far off place that's heat rivaled that of Hell and whose earth was barren and dusty. Its name was Texas.

And In Texas, there was a girl whose siblings were idiots and who raised her on blood, violence, and Metal Gear Solid.

Despite this torment, she grew up to be a successful teenager with some badass nerds for friends.

And this girl, a while back, got bored and started writing and couldn't stop. And so, Kitsune Alchemist was born.

Profile:

Name: I'll answer to Kitsu, I guess.

Age: Teens.

Occupation: Student, yo.

Hobbies: Writing, Reading, Procrastinating, Singing, Video Games, Movies, Cons...

Random:

Anime: Kuroshitsuji, Yu Yu Hakusho, Naruto, Blood Plus, Ouran Highschool Host Club, FullMetal Alchemist, Gravitation, etc.

Manga: My favorite is Loveless.

Because I’m just so special like that, I tend to watch things in Japanese that come out like… a month later in English. (ex. Death Note, Ouran, Loveless (though that one is my buddy’s fault), etc.)

All my favorite characters = Phsychotic. Idk why. They just turn out to be:

- BB (Ryuzaki); Death Note: Another Note = Psychotic mass murderer.

- Karasu; YYH = Psychotic guy who wants to rape my other favorite character.

- Wrath; FMA = insane after given Red Stones. Then proceeds to get in a fight with my other favorite character (Envy; FMA = also insane) and get the shit beaten out of him.

- Demyx, Zexion, and Axel; KH = All psycho in their own special way. Every single one of them. Axel and Demyx are at opposite ends of the bipolar spectrum, and Zexion’s an emo brainiac whose weapon is basically death by paper cut. There has to be something wrong with him for that to happen.

I will sometimes, occasionally, randomly send reviewers an email asking for idea prompts. Spices up life nicely, so leave a review and you might get a giftfic, k?

I love random comedy things that are parodies of stuff I love. Ansem retort and Demyx time are totally my saviors when it comes to boredom. (Read some of the quotes below).

I use ellipses (...) waaaaay too much... like... all the time. It gets seriously annoying to my friends, but whatever.

I'm a lazy ass. I procrastinate a lot. If I'm not working, try yelling at me. It may work. Who knows.

Quotes:

“We are the people our parents warned us about.” – Ashley

“All it takes to fly is to hurl yourself at the ground... and miss.” -Douglas Adams

“No wonder they execute people at dawn. Who wants to live at 6 a.m?” – Hawkeye

“Ever notice that “studying” is “student” and “dying” put together?” – Random pondering in class.

“I will leave Hello Kitty toaster Marks on your FACE!” – Mrs. Hill.

“Every time you say I don’t believe in Faeries, A Tenor dies.” – Choir joke

“Axel: Governor, I’ve taken 65 plane passengers hostage.

Zexion: I will not Negotiate with Terrorists!

Axel: Guess we’ll have to show you that we mean business- pssst… Zex, go kill a hostage.

Zexion: (covered in blood) hmm… so your willing to kill hostages. Let me talk with my cabinet… Axel, a terrorist is holding a plane hostage.

Axel: I say you give in to all his demands.

Zexion: I’m willing to negotiate.

Axel: The time for negotiations has long since ended!” – Ansem Retort #430 and #431.

"For anyone who ever said anything was possible, go slam a revolving door." - Unknown

"When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms. But when they broke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions!" - Unknown

"If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCULATOR = EVERLASTING FUN!" – Us on sugar at the mall…

"If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?" - Unknown

"As Long As There Are Tests, There Will Be Prayer In Public Schools." – Life lesson

"I intend to live forever, or die trying." - Unknown

"All those who believe in psycho-kinesis raise my hand." – My friend.

"When someone with multiple personalities threatens suicide, can that be considered a hostage situation?" – Random pondering in Creative Writing

"If you are smoking, I will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." – Me to my friend. I’m straight-edge and proud of it.

"So next time you throw someone out a window, you can yell, 'Defenesized, beotch!'" – Demyx; Demyx time

"Aww... we do too have hearts... but seriously, its like chronic emotional constipation." Demyx; Demyx time

More to be added later... probably…

Oh ya, one more thing. A generalized Disclaimer for all things on here: I own Nothing. Seriously. Nothing at all. As I am frequently reminded, everything I own is my parents because they pay for it. /blank stare/ Yeah, my parents kinda bite...

Last Thing, Promise:

My biggest pet peeve is people who read stories and favorite them, but can't even take the time to type a "good job" or give a single piece of constructive criticism. I'd rather people not favorite my stuff and leave a review than the other way around. Heck, I'd rather they do nothing at all if worst comes to worst. So, please, if you're reading this and have favorited anything of mine but not reviewed, please go back and type a few words. I'm not asking for a soliloquy here...