I'm looking for a beta that does Halo and Inheratence Cycle. I you do or know of one that is, plz have them contact me through my account.

Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

- The number 117 isn't just Master Chief's identification, it's the length of his penis... in yards.
- There is no energy shield. Projectiles just stop before hitting the Chief.
- Master Chief doesn't need weapons to kill things, the weapons need Master Chief
- The Spartan Mark V armor actually broke because it couldn't contain Master Chief's awesomeness.
- If the marines just stay out of his way, Master Chief can finish the entire Halo story before you can say 'Halo'.
- The Chief did scare some Elites. So much that even their armor colors turned white, that's why there are white armored Elites.
- Microsoft doesn't own Master Chief. On the contrary, the Master Chief owns Microsoft.
- Master Chief's voice has the power to give women orgasms. The helmet he wears merely keeps that from happening.
- There are no Hackers, Modders, Glitches, Lag, and Cheaters. You losers were playing against the Master Chief and he's a better player than you.
- Gordon Freeman sleeps in Master Chief pajamas.
- All leading causes of death among aliens involves Master Chief.
- There was indeed an ending for Halo 2. Your X-Box just can't handle it after loading the Master Chief.
- When the Master Chief files his Tax Returns, he sends in the forms with plasma grenades attached.
- In the original Super Mario Bros. The Master Chief is the reason why the princess is in another castle
- Master Chief once blew up a German Panzer tank just by staring at it for 2 seconds
- Master Chief has 2 settings: 'Kill' and 'Extreme Massacre'
- When Master Chief wants eggs, he melee attacks a chicken. The eggs come out boiled and nicely salted
- When Freddy Cruger goes to sleep. He gets haunted by Master Chief.
- Master Chief can solve a jigsaw puzzle by throwing the box into the air and shoot it with a full clip. The puzzle will land completely solved.
- Master Chief can eat a whole puffer fish and survive
- In the Grand Theft Auto games. It is possible to go beyond the 6 Star wanted level. When you do, Master Chief will immediately kill you with a rocket launcher.
- Respawn exists because the afterlife lives in fear of Master Chief.
- Breaking Benjamin's song for Halo 2, 'Blow Me Away', is a poem of one of Master Chief's many kills.
- The dictionary is actually a list of objects, places, and ways the Master Chief has , in many combinations, kill people.
- What happened to the wildlife from the early build of Halo? They commited suicide because they knew the Chief was coming.
- Spartan armor is actually designed to protect the enemies from the Master Chief
- The real reason that Bill Gates left Microsoft is because he pissed the Chief off. Now he's hiding in fear.
- When Master Chief wants steak. He melee attacks a pregnant mother cow, when the cow gives birth; she gives birth to a cooked steak with garnish
- When Chuck Norris files his taxes, he sends in a blank return and a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has never had to pay taxes.
One year, the IRS sent him back a picture of Jack Bauer wearing his dark sunglasses as a response to Chuck's means of filing his tax return. In response to the Jack Bauer photo, Chuck Norris sent the IRS a picture of Master Chief holding the Index in Halo's Control Room. The IRS never bothered Chuck ever again.
- When Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands, they're now known as 'The Islands'. When Master Chief visited the Islands after Chuck, Well... guess what happens next?
- Before the development of Rayman: Raving Rabbids. The Rabbids' had to undergo coaching to achieve their psychotic screaming, this coaching was done with a picture of Master Chief.
- For training to fight grunts master cheif 'Melee Attacks' the face of cow babies at least once a day (by Sonicgundam)
- Crime no longer exist because master chief took a bite out of it... LITERLY
- When Master Chief shoots. The bullets don't go into the enemies, the enemies are going into the bullets.
- In Halo 4 the ship blew up due to over exposer to the Master Chief.(By nomercy 745)

Due to a HUGE mistake on my part Twincest is Best and Diamond Pokemon have been permentaly deleted. I am sorry to the fans of both stories.

\This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!Paste this to your profile if you can read this!

I want to anounce thatt from this moment on I am taking request for stories. The only condition is NO SMUT! Just Pm me and tell me the fandom, notable characters, and a basic plot outline.

I watched the flag pass by one day,
It fluttered in the breeze.

A young Marine saluted it,
And then he stood at ease..

I looked at him in uniform
So young, so tall, so proud,
With hair cut square and eyes alert
He'd stand out in any crowd.

I thought how many men like him
Had fallen through the years.
How many died on foreign soil
How many mothers' tears?

How many pilots' planes shot down?
How many died at sea
How many foxholes were soldiers' graves?
No, freedom isn't free.

I heard the sound of Taps one night,
When everything was still,
I listened to the bugler play
And felt a sudden chill.

I wondered just how many times
That Taps had meant "Amen, When a flag had draped a coffin.
Of a brother or a friend.

I thought of all the children,
Of the mothers and the wives,
Of fathers, sons and husbands
With interrupted lives.

I thought about a graveyard
At the bottom of the sea Of unmarked graves in Arlington.
No, freedom isn't free.

Enjoy Your Freedom &God Bless Our Troops

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot. (Alot meaning all the time...)

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off. (well no, but I've gone though ALOT of pencils)

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

If you think that writing Fanfics is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace, Facebook, and Twitter is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes copy this on your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it copy this on your profile

I am now on devinart! If you are wondering where all the other rooms in the bases are, for RED VS. BLUE, their here http:///art/Blood-Gulch-Outpost-1-257459625

You Know You're Obsessed With Eragon When...
You hold your palm up to people you don't like and mutter words from the Ancient Language.
You actually have painted your palm silver.
You sit in class all day long trying to talk to your "dragon" mentally... with no results of course.
You toss around bones from the turkey you had from dinner and try to read people's lives from them.
You stare at your cat for hours on end trying to talk to it mentally.
You constantly visit Eragon sites on the net hoping to catch the newest news.
You ask people for autographs if their names are some what similar to ones in the book.
All of your pets are named after characters in Eragon.
You dyed the your pet named Saphira blue and gave it spikes.
You forge swords and chain mail armor.
Your parents ask you to go shovel a hole in the back yard for a new tree they bought and you stand there yelling "Stenr reisa!"
Your motto is Manin! Wyrda! Hugin!
The signature on your email account reads: "May your swords stay sharp!"
You're on your twentieth time reading Eragon.
You have an Eragon fan site.
You constantly dream of riding around the Spine on Saphira.
You're camping and you are trying to light the fire by screaming "Brisingr!" with no success.
You think up ways of stealing those two Dragon eggs from Galbatorix.
You can recite lines and passages from Eragon.
You've signed or started a petition about the release date of Eldest!
You cried for hours on end when Garrow died.
You found your self throwing your book across the room out of anger when Brom died.
You fall and scrape your knee then spend hours sitting there yelling "waise heill" at it.
You start carrying a blue rock around protesting its an egg.
You find yourself learning the Ancient language.
Inventing your own dragon.
You use quotes for signatures.
You learn swords play by beginning with sword-sticks.
You mutter Jierda Theirra Kalfis! when someone annoys you, to no avail.
Your AIM profile is in the ancient language, without any translation.
You constantly go camping to search for the Varden.
You go into deli and try to trade meat for a rock.
You daydream about dragons and come to thinking your nose got scorched.
You ask everyone you meet their true name.
You have a medieval dress and fake elf ears and pretend your Arya.
You search the internet looking for ways to get a dragon.
You change your name to Eragon.
You get a cut somehow on your back and start dancing around, screaming that you're Eragon/Murtagh.
You try to find your TRUE name.
Your parents have forbidden you to talk about Eragon at the dinner table, simply out of annoyance.
You've held a debate with your science teacher over how dragons really exist

Now on Facebook! Check out my new page! Nomercy745 on Facebook!