NOTE: the artwork of my avatar was provided by the artist Diana Rayablanca over on tumblr, (skeletonguys-and-ragdolls) and is mine by right of purchase, but hers by right of work put into the piece, also check out her art for "The Violet Diaries" by Helthehatter.

I'm a guy with a hobby of writing, reading, and character designing.

Name: just call me, "The Word Doctor"

Age: 24

Date of Birth: Dec. 17, 1991

Fanfiction Profession: I help fellow author MetalMunk with creature designs, and my services are available for other readers/authors who want a unique monster in their story. If you wish to "hire" my talents as a monster designer for your stories, then drop a line to me by clicking the "PM" doobly doo at the top of the page.

My Original Characters: The following is going to consist of character bios I made for my fanfics. The series they're related to will be mentioned also, for a clarification purpose.

Nathan Seville (Alvin and the Chipmunks).

Visual Appearance:

Unlike the other Seville’s, Nathan is a Fruit Bat from Madagascar, having escaped an exotic pet shipping ring, and stands at roughly twice as tall as Simon (he’s a Flying Fox, he’s supposed to be tall). His wings consist of two fingers supporting his wing membranes, the other two and his thumbs making a set of tridactile hands, and his wings when folded up poke out a couple inches from his elbows, requiring his deep orange coat to have special Velcro strips on the undersides of the sleeves and openings at the ends of the elbows. Also, like the chipmunks, he can speak human English, and while his voice is similar to theirs, it is just a slight bit deeper, and has a bit of an African accent. He also walks on two feet, with some difficulty due to him not being used to walking at all. Like most Flying Foxes, he eats mainly fruits, and his fur is black with an orange patch on his head.

Special Abilities:

Like most bats, Nathan is able to fly, though oddly enough he isn’t extremely good at it. It is also to be noted that he can use his bat senses relatively well. Strangely enough, for a bat he’s pretty good at video games.

Personality:

Nathan’s personality is a mix of a hurt child and an independent teenager (this due to his being abused in the smuggling ring), in that he hesitates to interact with people (so much so that it was thought he was either mute or unable to speak human English). The main point of his personality is that he has a distrust of humans, only able to fully trust Dave after some coaxing.

Notable Appearances:

Nathan Seville appears in the following stories:

1. Cold in This Place: A Bat's Tale

2. Where I'm From: A Bat's Tale 2 (it says "edited version" below)

3. First Day Of School: Can't Fight Instincts

Character Bio: Kris Seville. (Alvin and the Chipmunks).

Visual Appearance:

Kris a Long-eared Myotis bat from the American State of Boston. She is able to talk Human English, but unlike Nathan, is only the size of Alvin, and has a wingspan of about ten inches. Like her species name suggests, Kris has really pronounced ears, and like her flying fox counterpart, she has the same three fingered hands. Once she joins the Seville’s, she makes a bond with Nathan not unlike a little sister (much to the huge bat’s reluctance). Her body fur is colored like a brownish bronze, and her eyes are a unique shade of green. She wears a reddish/brown poncho style shirt, and the fur on her head is drawn up into a ponytail. Currently, Kris is about 10 or 12 years old. Recently, it was discovered that Kris is actually a bit of a hybrid, her mother having been a Long Eared Myotis, while her father was a Vampire bat.

Special Abilities:

Like most bats, Kris can fly (and relatively well for such a young bat). As to her hearing, Kris is actually a slight bit deaf, only able to hear at a normal human range. Unlike Nathan, Kris’s diet consists of a mix of fruits and insects. For a bat of any kind, she can sing relatively well (though she's also very shy about singing at all, so it's rare to hear her sing at all). As of the Hybrid discovery, Kris has gained a pair of fangs like a Vampire bat, and her eyes shift colors from green to red (though only if she hasn't had blood for a while), and she now requires a bit of blood in her regular diet.

Personality:

Kris has an odd personality, in that it seems like a mix of Brittany and Eleanor. She has a tendency to try and be the center of attention (leading to confrontations with Brittany on more than one account) but is also innocent and kind. Kris is extremely inquisitive, and will ask nearly a million questions if she feels she needs to. as to her newfound taste for blood, she actually prefers that of her sisters Brittany and Jeanette, though makes do with beef blood from the butcher, even if it tastes like the inside of a barn to her.

Story Debut:

Kris will appear in a fourth addition to the "A Bat's Tale" Series of stories.

Character Bio: Jessica Hawke.(Alvin and the Chipmunks). (never used... don't know why I made her)

Visual Appearance:

Jessica is a Ring Tailed Lemur from Madagascar who learned to talk human English by listening to the tourists that came to her island home. Once she makes it to America and meets with Ian Hawke, she wears a pair of specially tailored skinny jeans and a halter top with a purple zip-up hoodie. Unlike most Ring Tailed Lemurs, her fur isn’t the usual shade of grey, but a dark grey with a black streak across her left eye. Unlike Nathan or the chipmunks, Jessica has a relatively normal sounding voice, albeit just a slight bit more high-pitched due to her size.

Special Abilities:

As she is a primate, Jessica is able to climb really well and really fast. She also has a unique ability to pick locks easily, and she can leap long distances. With her being a primate, she is exceedingly intelligent.

Personality:

Jessica has a twisted personality, and believes that the superior mammal species of the world is the primates, holding a deep hatred for all other species, especially rodents. More specifically, the lemur holds a grudge against Nathan Seville, vowing one day to rid the world of his presence.

Alvin and Brittany Child Bios.

The following information is about the six children born to Alvin and Brittany Seville, and as such will list their physical and mental attributes.

Sandra Seville: The eldest daughter of Alvin and Brittany, Sandra was unfortunately born mute, meaning she had no voice of her own to speak with. Visually, Sandra is like if you took Brittany and gave her Alvin's fur and eyes, and due to her not having a voice, Simon taught her how to "speak" by using Sign Language, in doing so showing just how smart the eldest daughter truly was, picking up on Sign Language before her five siblings even started to talk. as she grew up, Sandra revealed a mischievous nature akin to her father, including getting Alvin trapped under a pillow and flinging food at him. Sandra, during a class in Simon and Jeanette's home school, showed an early understanding of mathematics and history, as well as a musical talent that she'd rather not use.

for clothing, Sandra usually wears a red skirt, pink and white top, and a denim jacket. Sandra is usually a nice person, but can be rather vindictive if she feels like someone wronged her.

Kevin Seville: The only other boy in Alvin and Brittany's litter, he is the exact opposite in regards to how he looks, appearing like it you gave Alvin blue eyes and auburn fur. Kevin is a wild card, not in that he usually acts up, but rather in that he only acts up when he feels the need to.

Jade Seville: Being the third girl born to Alvin and Brittany, Jade Seville is the more responsible of the six siblings, making her the "Simon" of the group in a sense. From Alvin, Jade inherited the same dark brown fur as his, with the double stripes along her back being a golden blonde color, and her hair a slight bit brighter than the fur on her body. Her eyes were passed from a generation skip, Jade having inherited her Aunt Jeanette's violet eyes, a shade lighter than the original color though. Although she isn't blind in any sense, Jade still wears a pair of glasses, as she is far sighted, making her unable to read things that are too close without the special glasses provided by her Great-uncle Ian, amazingly the miniature version of his own glasses the exact thing she needed, or the lenses anyway, Jade was fitted with chipmunk sized Clic Glasses, mainly because the normal variety always got lost and eventually broken. As it is, her new Clic Glasses have the same lenses as she needs to see properly, while ensuring that she could never lose them.

For her normal outfit, Jade usually wears a cobalt blue shirt with a thin decorative scarf around her neck, and a tiger-patterned skirt or sometimes even a pair of denim shorts. Although she may be responsible and intellectual, Jade isn't above her own bit of mischief every now and then. In fact, her talent in pranking is on par, if not beyond that of Amy's, mainly because she can make such complex contraptions to help her. And on that note, Jade is the tinkerer/grease-monkey of the family, finding greater amusement in taking something apart and putting it back together than in having "girl talk" with her sister, and like Amy, Jade isn't afraid of getting her paws dirty, though where Amy gets into fights, Jade gets literally messy in whatever may be in the device she's tinkering with.

Jade's personality is another odd one, seeming more like Simon than her own parents, though she still has her mother's fashion sense, and her father's mischievous sense of fun, though she hardly calls pulling pranks a pastime, rather she is always making various contraptions and gadgets. Being the smart one does come with a price though, in that she has a fair bit of difficulty understanding verbal irony…or otherwise known as "sarcasm", causing her to take a sarcastic remark to its literal meaning. It is because of this that most people think she has an ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder), but testing showed no sign of it. Jade is normally in a good mood, and is really optimistic about everything.

She can sing, though Jade is more into playing the music than actually singing, and has exceptional talent in playing the violin. Her personal idol is a woman named Lindsey Stirling, famous from the T.V. show "America's Got Talent," and as such, most of Jade's violin music is that of modern songs today, and the Chipette's talent in the violin is enough that she is able to dance while playing the instrument without missing a single note. Jade is the eldest of the three, and as such she is the one to make sure there is peace in the family.

Michael Seville: The only son of Alvin and Brittany, Michael was named to honor deceased pop singer Michael Jackson, as Alvin had been good friends with the singer when he was still alive. Michael Seville is the middle child, and inherited his mother's auburn fur with dark brown stripes along his back, and due to heterochromia, his left eye is gold like his father, while his right eye is blue like his mother's. Michael is the show off of the family, not on par with his younger sister Amy, but close to it, and in that right he is almost exactly like Alvin, though not as keen on mischief making as his two sisters.

His outfit usually consists of a black hoodie with a simple white T-shirt, and a black fedora to honor his namesake. Being the child he is, Michael is often caught in the middle on things, such as when his two sisters start arguing over something. When this happens, Michael will not so much become upset, but he will actually take the lead and be the one to get between them and make sure that no one gets hurt, which is lucky that these arguments between the sisters are very far and few between.

When it comes to personality, Michael is a bit of a comedian, and although not in any way stupid will purposefully act like a twit in order to get a laugh, and even has a fair bit of talent in voice acting, mainly mimicking accents of the world. As such, when he feels like annoying Amy, he will use the most annoying voice tone he possibly can, which often ends up with Michael having to run and hide behind his mother. His voice changing talent also comes in handy when singing, as he is able to sing while he changes accents without missing a beat.

Speaking of beat, Michael, like his namesake, is excellent at dancing, and utilizes aspects of the late King of Pop himself, as well as adding his own style on that. Such dancers he favors include the dance crew known as the Jabbawockeez, and of course Michael Jackson himself. He is very caring and compassionate, and in fact stands up against bullying by attempting to "reach out" to the bullies, to show that the victim isn't always the only one with problems.

Amy Seville: The spitting image of her mother, Amy Seville is a rather bossy and mischievous little girl. Having inherited her mother's sense of fashion, while also inheriting her father's need to cause trouble, Amy can be quite the handful. Her fur is an almost exact match to Brittany's, the only difference being that hers is just the slightest bit darker than her mother's, and her hair is styled in the same way, albeit a bit longer and sometimes in a braid rather than a pony-tail. As for physical traits she got from Alvin, Amy inherited the same gold colored eyes as her dad.

When it comes to clothes, Amy is almost always wearing something with a light burgundy color, and like her father has a big letter "A" on her clothes somewhere, usually on the back as she likes to wear open fronted shirts like a zip-up hoodie. With this she has a navy blue sleeveless shirt on under the hoodie, and a skirt of the same color. Although this is her usual outfit, Amy isn't above wearing other clothes, and in fact often tries to help her siblings with their outfits.

Personality wise, Amy is like her father, always taking the lead when the chance presents itself, and as mentioned earlier she has Alvin's sense of mischief, a potential prank almost always in the back of her mind. Though that doesn't mean she's uncaring, in fact it's quite the opposite, being the tomboy of the family, she isn't afraid to get her paws dirty defending her siblings. Like her mother, Amy is very kind, though easy to anger and/or annoy, something that Jade and Michael sort of find amusing. But also like her mother, Amy has the thought process of a diva, and in some way loves to be the center of attention.

When it comes to singing, Amy is like a mix between Alvin and Brittany, able to hit the high notes that only a girl can, yet also able to rap just as well as her dad. Amy's favorite singers include such people as Nicky Minaj, Justin Bieber, Pitbull, Akon, Usher, Beyoncé, Lady GaGa, One Direction, and even AC/DC, and although these are her favorites, Amy loves all the singers music collectively. Although she denies it, Amy is actually the youngest of the three siblings, having been born last of the children by about two minutes.

Teen Titans: Next Generation.

This is a file containing the information of the next team of Titans to aid in defending Jump City, and will list their names, age, powers/abilities, and their origins in regards to their birth. Like the original team, there are five members, and they are as follows, starting with the leader.

Name: Xand'r Greyson

Hero Name: Nightfire

Age: 16

Hair Color: Black

Eye Color: Blue Tamaranean (think Starfire's eyes, only replace the green with blue)

Skin Color: Light Orange (think a mix between Starfire and Robin's skin tones and there you go)

Parents: Dick Greyson (Robin/Nightwing) and Koriand'r (Starfire)

Powers/Abilities: Due to the strong Tamaranean genetics from Koriand'r, Xand'r is practically a full blood Tamaranean himself, and as such has all the powers related to his mother's race such as flight and general levitation, super human strength, as well as being able to throw starbolts from his hands and fire beams from his eyes (though his eye beams and starbolts are blue instead of green). He also possesses the ability to learn any language instantly through lip contact, but hardly likes to use it due to the social implications such acts can imply (the only time he used this ability was to be able to translate German during a mission, and for that he had to kiss his aunt Raven, which was awkward to say the least). His human genetics does offer some differences to his normal biology, such as partial immunity to his mother's allergy to metallic chromium, the substance only making him sneeze and get his nose stuffed up, rather than rendering him completely powerless. His other human benefit is that he is skilled in hand-to-hand combat, as well as the use of weapons such as a bo-staff, though usually only uses it when the need calls for it.

Appearance/Personality: standing roughly at seven feet tall, Xand'r Greyson has a lean build, though mostly due to his biology more than anything else, as he also has toned muscles all over his body. His black hair is usually kept at shoulder length, as well as two bangs that frame his face in a similar way as his mother's own hair. His usual uniform consists of a body suit with shorter sleeves and legs than his father's, and wears a pair of boots and gauntlets like his mother's. The suit he wears bears a dark blue depiction of a raven on the chest, and though he says that it's to set himself apart from his father, his fellow team mates suspect it's for other reasons he has it there. As the leader of the new titans, Xand'r has a highly vigilant mind, though unlike his father he is actually able to relax a bit. When his team is in danger, that is when he gets serious. An example of this is when, during a chance encounter with Plasmus, his team mate Midnight got bashed into a wall, causing Xand'r to go into a fury of attacks, throwing so many starbolts and eye blasts at the amorphous villain that he nearly killed the man that the monster came from.

The next member is the quickest member of the team, and one of two females in the group.

Name: Jenny West

Hero Name: Quickstrike

Age: 15

Hair Color: Red

Eye Color: Pink

Skin Color: Slightly Pale Peach

Parents: Wally West (Kid Flash) and Jinx

Powers/Abilities: Jenny West has an interesting blend of her parent's powers, able to do everything both are able. From her father she gained the obvious ability of speed, with which she can run across the globe and back without breaking a sweat, as well as vibrate her molecules to the point that she can walk through solid objects. From her mother she has the ability to throw hexbolts, and in essence cause really bad luck for her opponents. As a benefit of her speedster heritage, if Jenny gets injured or becomes sick for some reason, it usually takes no more than a few minutes to an hour to heal, or a full day's sleep for a sickness.

Appearance/Personality: Standing at a modest height of six feet tall, Jenny is a bit of a showgirl in her uniform choices. Her basic outfit is a dark pink jumpsuit with red boots and gloves, a red mini skirt around her hips and a pair of red lightning bolts on the sides of her cowl. Like her father's outfit, her red hair is free to flow out the back, though she usually only has it shoulder length and kept in either a ponytail or a braid, and on her chest is not a lightning bolt emblem, but a pink hexbolt emblem. As a person, she's flirty and very mischievous, almost taking the place as the prankster from the last team of titans. She has a love of fashion, music, videogames, and movies.

This next addition is the only member who is an adopted child to be a member of the titans team.

Name: Jason Stone

Hero Name: Jayborg

Age: 17

Hair Color: Black

Eye Color: Green

Skin Color: White, slightly tanned

Parents: Victor Stone (Cyborg) and Karen Beecher (Bumblebee)

Powers/Abilities: unlike the other titans in this team, Jason was a normal kid, though at a young age he lost both his legs and most of his right arm in a car accident, at the time confining him to a wheelchair. When his parents went looking to adopt a child, Victor noticed the handicapped boy and, upon discussing it with Karen, adopted Jason as his son. Soon after, Victor went to work constructing bionic prosthetics for his son, and after a few weeks of trial and error, Jason was able to walk with his new legs, as well as use his right arm as if he was born with it. When he was deemed ready to go on missions, Jason was given a body suit, helmet and gauntlet for his torso, head and left arm so he would remain relatively safe. Like his father, Jason can shift his right hand into a sonic cannon, though his sonic blasts are green instead of blue, from his left hand gauntlet Jason can fire short range stun grenades. Like his mother, Jason was given the ability to fly by means of a pair of mechanical wings on his back, though he's since removed them and replaced them with a jetpack in the back of his body suit.

Appearance/Personality: Jason, when on missions, wears a body suit, helmet and gauntlet for his left arm, which looked a lot like Victor's own robot parts at first, but with a bit of spray paint and body work, changed into a black and green color scheme. When not on duty, however, Jason can be seen wearing a pair of shorts and a simple tank top. Forming a quick bond with his other four team mates, Jason is the “Cyborg” of the group, showing skills in cooking, playing videogames with Jenny, and even tinkering around with technology. Jason is the tallest titan, standing at eight feet tall, which would have been his actual height had he not lost his legs. Despite this, he's a big ball of affection, though when he needs to he can dish out a mean punishment, such as during a mission with the H.I.V.E. Five which had Kyd Wykkyd had managed to actually render Jenny unable to run with a special power dampening bracelet, and the girl was nearly killed by Mammoth. Jason went nuts, rushing over and, with the help of Midnight in the form of a dragon, beating the two villains back and allowing Jason to remove the bracelet from Jenny, to which she hexed Kyd Wykkyd into a wall and punched Mammoth over a million times within the span of a single second. It's suspected that Jason holds romantic feelings for Jenny, but if the resident speedster has any of the same feelings for Jason is a different story altogether.

This member is the only other magic user on the team, and is also the only other female.

Name: Rebecca Arella Logan

Hero Name: Midnight

Age: 14

Hair Color: Dark Violet

Eye Color: Amethyst Violet

Skin Color: Pale Green

Parents: Garfield Mark Logan (Beast Boy/Changeling) and Raven

Powers/Abilities: Rebecca Logan is a unique one, as she has all the powers of both her parents combined. From her mother, Rebecca gained the ability to levitate objects, manipulate shadows to her will, teleport herself and others great distances, freeze time, heal the injuries of others, phase through walls and other objects, as well as cast powerful magic spells. She is also an empath, meaning she can feel the emotions of others as if they were her own, and sense their auras. From her father she gained the ability to morph into any animal in existence at her will, but due to her partial demonic heritage the morphing ability also allows her to shift into creatures from mythology such as dragons and phoenixes, from her mother's home plane of Azarath, what some assume to be demonic creatures found only in the realm of Trigon, as well as creatures from fiction, as seen when she morphed into a rancor from the “Star Wars” series during a mission that involved Cinderblock. She is only able to fly in the form of an animal, unlike her mother, and while she often takes the form of a bird or other flying creature, she sometimes takes the form of a dragon so that she can attack with a gout of fire before landing. As an unfortunate side effect to her heritage, Rebecca does need to meditate to keep her emotions in check (though not as much as her mother does), and when she gets upset to the point of rage, she becomes what has only been called “The Rage Beast” and for good reason. In this form, she is taller than Nightfire, and is covered in dark violet fur, her body is considerably leaner than her father's Beast form, but only due to her being female. Like her mother's Rage demon form, Rebecca's Beast has four glowing red eyes, and black shadowy tentacles rise from her body, mainly her back but also her arms at times.

Appearance/Personality: Rebecca is the youngest, and currently shortest member of the team, standing only at five and a half feet tall, she has her mother's hair and eyes, as well as a chakra stone in her forehead, though hers is amber instead of a ruby. From her father, Rebecca inherited pointed ears, fangs and, though barely visible on her fingers, claws. Her normal outfit is a mash up of her parent's old uniforms, consisting of a two piece version of her father's old Doom Patrol outfit, with the bottom portion of the shirt only covering a half inch just under her chest, and the sleeves only going to her elbows, bottoms covering just under her navel with legs only reaching her knees. Her shoes are like those of her father's only with blue ankle cuffs, and she wears a pair of fingerless gloves with blue cuffs, both so she can use her demonic magic easily, and also so she can use her claws when fighting in her human form. Around her waist is a belt like her mother's along with a hooded cloak, though hers only reaches just below her knees, and is embroidered with magical runes for decoration, but also acting to make her cloak able to block nearly any form of attack. Like her mother, Rebecca is a bit of a loner, not that she tries to cut herself away from the others, just she prefers to be alone with a book than to be with anyone, but unlike her mother Rebecca isn't above socializing, and will even drop whatever she may be doing in order to spend time with her friends. Rebecca is also more open with her emotions, as she shows a fair amount of care for the team leader, Xand'r. Like her father, Rebecca is a vegetarian, but not for any moral reasons, as she has found out that her powers are easier to keep in control when she doesn't eat meat. Only during times of stress does she ever eat real meat, and even then the most she ever eats is either a hotdog or a piece of beef jerky. Rebecca also drinks tea, but not by her choice, rather she drinks it because the team discovered that too much sugar and caffeine cause her to get a “sugar high”, which renders Rebecca a hyper active idiot with a case of motor mouth. As stated earlier, Rebecca is extremely protective of Xand'r, to the point that when he was nearly killed by Adonis, she went Rage Beast and practically ripped Adonis's muscle suit to scrap metal.

The final member of the new titans is interesting in his skillset.

Name: Jace Markov

Hero Name: Tsunami

Age: 15

Hair Color: Blonde

Eye Color: Black

Skin Color: White

Parents: Garth (Aqualad) and Terra Markov

Powers/Abilities: Jace Markov is interesting in that he is, like his mother, a skilled geomancer, able to “fly” by use of rock levitation, though is also able to manipulate water to his will, allowing him to surf on a wave itself like his father. Also like his father, Jace is able to breath both on land and under water, as well as communicate with all known forms of aquatic life, and speak the Atlantean language, almost as fluently as English. He also possesses super human strength and swimming abilities. When using his powers in conjunction with each other, Jace is able to create a mini tsunami, or make a bit of quicksand to trap enemies in, as seen during a sparring match with Jason on the beach (to put it lightly, Jason was NOT amused with having to clean the sand from his robot parts).

Appearance/Personality: Jace stands at roughly six feet tall, making him the same height as Jenny West, but is built in much the same way as his father, a lean yet muscular build. For his uniform he wears a body suit similar to his father's. Though his had gold “T” on the chest. Jace is the logic behind the team, and in many respects he is second in command, as with his genius mind Xand'r will often discuss plans in length with Jace in order to get his honest opinion. That being said, Jace isn't above causing a fair bit of mischief, as seen when he used his water manipulation powers to soak Rebecca during a swimming instruction, which earned him a prompt trip to med bay for a broken leg (Rebecca had chucked a large rock at Jace with her powers, and Jace didn't notice it in time to stop it, Rebecca healed it the best she could, but he was still stuck in a cast for a week). Like his father, Jace isn't aware of his good looks, and similar to Raven and Starfire when they both first met with Aqualad, Jenny and Rebecca both often find themselves admiring the boy, Jenny more so than Rebecca for obvious reasons.

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping." (What if your hair comes out better when you do it up asleep?)

On a bag of Fritos!: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (Yes, cause everyone is into shoplifting today -sees someone running to the shop door with stolen stuff- Don't worry, the Sentry Turrets will get him -gunfire in the background- "Target Acquired" "Dispensing Product")

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (What if my regular soap is liquid? -takes out a plastic dish- I guess I'll microwave it www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg8hWDXamPg )

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (What about the Brownie? Keep it cold and it's pudding :P)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well Sh*t)

On Marks Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Thank you Captain Obvious!)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (Who in their right mind would do such a thing? -hears screaming and smells burnt fabric- Forget I even asked.)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (-after taking some- Driving my car while I sing this song! -crashes into the ditch- Aw F*k!)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (Good Lord. It's called "Sleep Aid" for a reason!)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (So I can't decorate myself with them? -is wrapped up in lights, with them plugged in- Bummer.)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Okay, now I'm curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." ( You don't say!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Really? I thought you just ate them package and all.)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (Anyone stupid enough to think this is...probably the cause of this warning.)

On any brand of Curling Iron: "Warning: Do not insert this into any bodily opening." (What kind of stuff are people into these days?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD

IF YOUR LIFE WERE A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?

So, here's how it works:

1. Get your iPod(I used my Windows Media Player for it)

2. Put it on shuffle

3. Press play

4. For every question, type the song that's playing

5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.

Opening Credits:

Party Rock Anthem by: LMFAO (Cool :P )

Waking Up:

We No Speak Americano/Conga by: The Chipettes (Huh?)

First Day At School:

Whip My Tail by: The Chipettes (O_o)

Making Your New Best Friend:

Mamma Mia by: A*Teens (What. The. Actual. F*k?)

Falling In Love:

Party Rock Anthem by: The Chipmunks The Chipettes (This could work……kinda?)

Breaking Up:

Club Can’t Handle Me by: The Chipmunks The Chipettes (Really? I’m gonna be heart broken and this song will be playing?)

Prom:

Take A Chance by: A*Teens (This finally makes sense.)

Graduation:

Bad Romance by: The Chipmunks The Chipettes (Well, I already graduated so I don’t have to worry……unless this applies to college too.)

Life's Okay:

Want You Gone from: Portal 2 end credits (Oddly enough this works O_o)

Death of a Close Friend:

Still Alive by: Ellen McLain (LOL, Kinda an oxy-moron there… But seriously wrong choice of songs WMP.)

Mental Breakdown:

Sexy And I Know It by: LMFAO (Yeah, I’d need to have a mental breakdown in order to dance to this LOL.)

Flashback:

S.O.S. by: The Chipettes (No flashback theme? Just gonna play this when I’m reminiscing?)

Getting Back Together:

Trouble by: The Chipmunks The Chipettes (Oh gee, thanks karma, really a confidence booster.)

Birth of Child:

Born This Way/Ain’t No Stopping Us Now/Firework by: The Chipmunks The Chipettes (Oddly enough, not only the “Born This Way” section works.)

Wedding Scene:

All I Want For Christmas Is You by: Justin Bieber Mariah Carey (Well, if the wedding was around that time of the year I guess.)

Car Accident:

Real Wild Child by: The Chipmunks The Chipettes (If I survive the crash, I swear I’ll slap my WMP with a fish!)

Final Battle:

Never Say Never by: Justin Bieber and Jaden Smith (-shrugs my shoulders- Eh, that works.)

Death Scene:

Survivor by: The Chipettes (O_o Really?)

Funeral Song:

That Should Be Me by: Justin Bieber Rascall Flatts (Somewhat related.)

End Credits:

Common Denominator by: Justin Bieber (I could see this.)

Deleted Scenes:

Santa Claus Is Coming To Town by: Justin Bieber (Okay, too much Bieber on my computer!)

1) They are brothers, nothing else.

This is a dumb rule, for one they’re a rock band, and for two they’re also chipmunks.

2) They must always live with Dave.

You know, if I want to make them live in a trailer park with some guy named Bill, I will do it dammit!

3) They must always end up with the Chipettes. Alvin can hit on other girls, but he must end up with Brittany.

This I can agree with, but what if I decide to pair up Alvin with Eleanor, Simon with Brittany and finally Theodore with Jeanette? You mean to tell me that I can’t do that? SCREW YOU!

4) They cannot die.

You’re kidding right? I mean if that’s the case then I’m sure there’s millions of people who’ve broken this rule already.

5) They can have superpowers, but the color of the magic/mystical zone has to be the same color as they're signature colors.

I’m all for superpowers, but if I want to give Alvin the ability to shoot rainbows from his armpits, I’ll do it whether or not you want me to!

6) They can't die.

Uhhhhhh…didn’t you already mention this?

7) They can't be severely injured.

THE HELL THEY CAN’T! I’ll make Simon get knocked out five times in a row in a game of dodge-ball if I want to dammit!

8) There cannot be any OCs. Only the Chipmunks, Dave, and the characters created by the Bagdasarians.

F*CK YOU! I’ll have Nathan, Kris, and Jessica (go to “Character Bio” section) if I want to!

9) The Chipettes HAVE to live with Miss Miller.

Hmm, here’s an interesting question, where’s this Miss Miller broad to in the CGI film?

10) If you kill them, thus violating numbers 4 and 6, you must bring them back. Also making it a horror story.

So, I can’t kill them off in the first place…fair deuce, but if they just so happen to get squished under some heavy object, then I have to turn them into zombies? Neat!

11) They can't be in horror stories.

Never-mind, you obviously have a sick sense of humor.

12) You must have at least three jokes/gags in a chapter.

Okay, so if Alvin’s crying his eyes out from the death of Brittany, I have to have a joke/gag in that scene? Whoever you are that made these rules, you are insensitive!

13) If you do a Chipmunk crossover, it must be with some other cartoon. Not live action.

Assuming that the only Chipmunks worth writing about are the Cartoon versions, you sir obviously haven’t seen the live action movies at all. And furthermore, if I want to cross the cartoon chipmunks over with the live action Transformers, I’ll do it, just to spite you!

14) If you have songs, they have to fit in the story. Not just be random.

I have only written one songfic so far, but if I wanna have a scene where Alvin and Jeanette are arguing over something, I’ll make Alvin randomly start singing “I’m Walking on Sunshine” right in the middle of it. Why you may ask? Because screw you that’s why!

15) The Chipmunks do not work for free. If you use them you must send Ross Bagdasarian Jr. 100 dollars by the end of the month, or else you'll die instantly.

Well, I must be immune, because my Chipmunk related uploads started during Christmas, and it’s fricking January!

16) Don't talk about the rules, don't tell people about the rules, don't even think about the rules!

You are a sick and twisted little troll, whoever you are that wrote these rules…screw you!

Fanfiction Quiz (Copied from Kuro Rakka Shimo's profile):

Which do you prefer? Reading fanfic , or writing them?: I like doing both, but if I had to pick only one to favoritize, I'd have to say I prefer reading to writing, if for nothing else than for inspiration.

Do insulting reviews discourage you?: No, not really. I hardly ever get insulting reviews, and the only time I got a review that could be considered an insult, it was from a fellow author giving me a fair piece of constructive critisim. If I were to see outright flaming on any of my posts, I'd ignore it.

What do you mainly write and read about?: Well, when writing for this site, I mostly write about funny things, sometimes touching moments, and as of recently, rather... intimate situations. Reading I cover a wide variety, both on here and with proper books, my favorite series being the Skulduggery Pleasant books by Derek Landy. Mostly where I get my inspiration for writing such humorous stories.

Are you proud of your fanfics?: Now where would I be if I weren't proud of my fanfics? Oops, I seem to have answered your question with another question.

How long have you been on fanfiction.net?: I've been a user since July 15 2010, but I never posted any content until about a year after, my very first story, “Timber's Babysitting Adventure” being posted on April 15 2011

Have you inspired any other writers?: The only author I know I've inspired was Isiah02, and that was just for him to make his own rule book after I featured him as a guest in “Seville Family Rule Book”. By the way, check out “Isiah02's Rules to Survive” it's pretty damn funny!

When you are added to a person's Favorite Author's list, how do you react?: I feel a soft warmth in my chest, and smile to myself. For those who don't know, I am just a hum drum, run of the mill dude who's only fan base was a few cats... I appreciate everyone who finds my content worth their time to follow/favorite me in order to keep up to date.

Would you cry if you posted a one-shot, came back the next morning, and found a thousand reviews in your mailbox?: If this ever happened... I think I'd just stare at my phone in disbelief for a few minutes and then say, “Well... that escalated quickly.”

Do you think it's possible for you to get a thousand reviews for a one-shot?: Probably not, but then again even the impossible can be made tangible.

Is it regular for you to get over 10 reviews for each chapter?: I don't think I've ever gotten more than five reviews for a single chapter, outside of a while ago when I would do a question thing at the end of a story.

What was your first story on this site?: As stated above, my very first story was “Timber's Babysitting Adventure” which is still up on my page, and is the only fanfic for an entirely different series outside of AATC.

What is your latest fanfic posted?: My latest story is “Class is in Session” and involves Simon and Jeanette home schooling Alvin and Brittany's eldest daughter Sandra, who was born mute.

If you compare the two, how far have you gone since you first started writing fanfics?: For starters, my writing has gotten much neater since I first came to join this site... heck I was about to take my very first story down once, when I saw it had been added to someones favorites, so because of that, my first story in all it's horrendous glory is still available to take a look at.

Are you a legend in your archive?: I don't... what? Can I get a do-over here, I don't understand!

What are the most things you hate in people on fanfiction and in RL?: I am not a hateful man, but I can't stand unmitigated flaming or discrimination.

What are the most things you like in people on fanfiction and in RL?: The fact that, no matter how much bad there is in the world, there's always hope for a better day.

Whats your favorite thing about yourself?: As Kuro stated, you have to like everything about yourself to be a good writer... but If I have to give a straight answer, then I'd say my unwavering sense of humor.

Whats your least favorite thing about yourself?: Again, you have to like everything about yourself, but to give a straight answer, I'd have to say my least favorite thing in myself is... I don't really know, huh, I'm sure I had something for- my forgetfulness!

Why did you come to fanfiction?: I actually came here by accident, I was bored one day and was trying to find something to read, when I stumbled upon this wonderful site. Short answer, I came here because I was bored.

What was your first story: ...Something seems a bit fishy here, but since I mentioned my very first story period way too many times, my first AATC story was “All I Want” a holiday song fic featuring the duet version of Mariah Carey's “All I Want For Christmas” featuring Justin Bieber... I know, I'm sad at myself too.

Whats something for people to know when the read your stories?: Well, for one I have Aspergers, a condition similar to autism but more on the high functioning side of things. But because of this I literally think in pictures, and it reflects in my writing a bit, as I'm not necessarily trying to tell a story proper, I'm trying to describe an image from my head to the best of my ability.

Have you ever wrote a mixed couple AATC story?: The closest I came to this was when I first introduced my main OC Nathan, and having Jeanette starting to fall for him. But then I figured in the future there'd be another bat in Nathan's life... and I was right!

Do you think your a good writer?: I have over sixty stories on my page... If I didn't have faith in myself as a writer then I'd be a flop.

Are you on a lot of peoples favorite authors?: I don't really bother to check, but lately I've been getting notifications on my phone saying when someone adds me to their favorites. If you want an actual number then I can't answer, maybe I am, maybe not.

Do you write stories for over your age?: As of lately, I've been throwing myself into the mature side of things, if for nothing else than to try and give it a shot, my first official mature story being “Coitus Inturruptus” and even that was a bit innocent in it's idea origin.

Do you think your nice?: I've aided numerous other authors with their stories and never asked for any compensation, if that ain't nice then I'm a dick... QUOTE ME ON IT!

Which chipette are you most like?: I'm a dude... but if I had to say then I'd have to say a unique blend of the three, as like Brittany I have a bit of a temper, like Jeanette I'm really smart, and like Eleanor I like cooking... and admittedly I'm a wee bit chubby.

Whats your favorite show?: I actually don't have one... though shows I do like are “Big Bang Theory”, “Man vs Food”, “Forensic Files”, “Bones”... oh you were expecting me to say the new AATC reboot series? Sorry, I don't really like it, not the content just the animation style, for me it's a case of it “Looking better on paper than on screen”

Whats your least favorite actor/actress/singer?: Can I just say Beat Takeshi and be done with it? As JonTron said, what wasn't that guy?

Click here for an Inspirational Speech.