Progman
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Joined 06-08-12, id: 4046338, Profile Updated: 02-19-16
Author has written 16 stories for Mass Effect, Fallout, Legend of Korra, and Dragon Age.

Most of my Legend of Korra fics are part of the same timeline and are meant to be read in a specific order, even if their publish dates don't coincide with that. They are part of a larger story that is...something more than I thought it would be. The series is called "Spin the Rails" on Ao3, which in all honesty is where you should be reading it, as there's ton cool formatting things I can't do on this site. So click here for that, if you want the intended experience.

You can also follow me on tumblr for metas, fanart and lots of other fun extra stuff about things!

Anyway...

READ ORDER IS AS FOLLOWS:

Part 1:

"You Can't Fix Everything"

"The Cactus"

"Bust Some Heads"

Part 2-4:

"Repairs, Retrofits, and Upgrades."

Extra Fluff/Cut Content:

"Addendums, Additions and Appendixes"


Oh hey there, person-who-clicked-the-link-to-my-profile! I'd offer you snacks, but the internet hasn't quite perfected the transportation of complex physical mass through the ol' series of tubes quite yet.

There are many who have described me as a 'jolly grandpa', 'silly', 'aggressive', 'goofy' and 'intimidating'. That last one baffles me, but hey, he said it. I've got one hell of an affinity for subversive humor, puns, strong female characters, snark, smart parodies/satires/AUs, loosely connected continuity as a source of humor and story cohesion, thematic integrity, and most of all the buddy cop dynamic. So underused nowadays.

Always been a storyteller to some degree, and it's something I've always loved to do. Doesn't really matter what the format is. Film, Text, Games, Theatre...if it's a good story, it's a good story. I've been writing for a long time, but I've never shared any of it to a wide audience. Most of my works are half-finished or simply outlines with bits of dialogue and set-pieces thrown about, but the ideas are still there.

Above all else, I am very much a visual story teller...without the funding, support or time to do so at the moment. So why write in text? Because it's still fun as hell, and it's a very cool challenge to try and communicate visual cues through text. Fanfics are the easiest, since we already know what it all looks like. Since I think so much in visuals, it's pretty much like story boarding a movie or a game. This makes writing, at times, very difficult for me as Mass Effect, among other things, has an incredibly powerful visual theme/story that is just as important, if not moreso, than the actual literary narrative. This is why I favor action and environments over 'talky scenes', despite my love of writing dialogue. Action is the best way, for me, to bridge that gap between visuals and text.

If the writer holds the camera, then the action scene is the where he personally sets every shot. Or something.

Also it's more fun to write, I guess.

Now, I say that, and yet most of my stories are dialogue. I am nothing if not inconsistent. _

All feedback and criticism is greatly appreciated, so don't hold back. It's also very motivating.

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Scorched Earth by DeathscytheVII reviews
AU. What if the Fire Nation had won the war? Twenty years after Sozin's Comet, Korra is born and raised as a soldier of the Fire Nation, not knowing the immense power and legacy she inherits. It is up to the old Gaang to show her the way, so that she can defeat the Fire Nation and bring balance back to the world. Featuring Korra and the older Gaang plus LOK characters
Crossover - Avatar: Last Airbender & Legend of Korra - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 69 - Words: 375,728 - Reviews: 1193 - Favs: 768 - Follows: 842 - Updated: 4/18 - Published: 9/16/2012 - Korra
Mass Effect: Human Revolution by IgnusDei reviews
Adam Jensen finds himself in a time only dreamed of in vids, humanity is now part of a great galactic community that fears synthetics, and he struggles to find his place within it. Note: Primarily a DX/ME crossover, with elements borrowed and integrated from other Square Enix franchises.
Crossover - Deus Ex & Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Supernatural - Chapters: 90 - Words: 867,837 - Reviews: 2593 - Favs: 2,703 - Follows: 2,747 - Updated: 12/16/2019 - Published: 3/12/2012
The Cerberus Files Addenda : The Systems Alliance by LogicalPremise reviews
Cerberus's take on the SA. Follows the style of the the Cerberus Files for alien races, but this time going into the dark and ugly history of the Systems Alliance, changes in human culture, and details about the government, politics, and more, written by Minsta. Sort of my take on Renegade Reinterpretations, except more like 'bloodthirsty lunatic reinterpretations with an axe.'
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Tragedy - Chapters: 16 - Words: 90,351 - Reviews: 174 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 3/16/2019 - Published: 11/9/2012 - [Illusive Man, OC] Kai Leng, O. Petrovsky
The Last Spartan by DinoJake reviews
An AU fic in which the Halo and ME universes share the same galaxy. After a well deserved rest in Cryo-Sleep, Master Chief finally awakens...to a whole new galaxy.
Crossover - Halo & Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 55 - Words: 489,686 - Reviews: 3952 - Favs: 3,976 - Follows: 3,989 - Updated: 12/31/2018 - Published: 5/2/2010 - Master Chief/John-117
OSaBC : Lions in Blue and Silver by LogicalPremise reviews
The story of the Legacy Team in the First Contact War: Ahern, Kyle, Florez, Chu, and Saracino. A pre-ME1 quickfic covering some of the OCs from the main story as they go up against the Turian Hierarchy and then struggle to adapt to the changing lives they are forced into by surviving. M for violence and Ahern's mouth.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 51,100 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 12/20/2018 - Published: 10/2/2014 - Benezia
The Heart Asks for Pleasure First by Chi Kyoku reviews
A month after taking down Saren, Shepard spends Christmas shore leave with her favourite turian C-Sec officer on the Citadel. Movies are watched, gifts are exchanged, and two war heroes celebrate their unlikely friendship.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 74,232 - Reviews: 829 - Favs: 520 - Follows: 598 - Updated: 9/19/2018 - Published: 4/11/2012 - [Garrus V., J. Garson]
Sound the Clarion by Amber Penglass reviews
In the chaos of the ongoing First Contact War, the Alliance is contacted by a resistence cell comprised of captured humans on Palaven, and Shepard is drafted for a covert mission to make contact. Her cover lands her where? The Vakarian household, of course. Shepard/Garrus, AU.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 153,255 - Reviews: 890 - Favs: 1,105 - Follows: 1,026 - Updated: 6/1/2016 - Published: 8/12/2011 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
OSaBC : And Then There Were None by LogicalPremise reviews
A continuation of the Alternative Universe story in "Of Sheep and Battle Chicken," as Major-Commander Shepard deals with her promotion, a series of threats that could take down the government of the SA, and the ramifications of humanity joining the Council. Includes Pinnacle Station and Bring Down the Sky. M for language and violence. FShep/Liara. Coauthor Progman. Now complete.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Suspense - Chapters: 40 - Words: 430,003 - Reviews: 720 - Favs: 465 - Follows: 331 - Updated: 4/11/2015 - Published: 9/23/2014 - [J. Garson, Liara T'Soni] Garrus V., Tali'Zorah - Complete
The Inquisitor is Easily Distracted by Knightfall1138 reviews
The Temple of Sacred Ashes has been destroyed, the Veil has been breached, and Thedas stands on the edge of chaos. A lone elf emerges from the destruction wielding the "mark", making her only person in all the land that can set things right. Andraste probably should have chosen better.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Parody/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,051 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/17/2015 - Lavellan
Korra Doesn't Like Fanfiction by I'mNotGoodAtThis reviews
After receiving an important lesson from Master Katara about the horrors of fanfiction, Korra decides that she won't let the same thing happen to her. Current chapter: Korra meets someone new and falls for him completely. Will Mako reveal his true feelings to Korra? How will Korra react? Read to find out! Don't read the character pairing, that's cheating.
Legend of Korra - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 39,016 - Reviews: 160 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 11/13/2014 - Published: 8/20/2012 - [Korra, Mako]
Sense and Flexibility by Roarkshop reviews
The story of Garrus and Femshep as told by me. Lots of off-canon. Sequels incoming. TW: It's been brought to my attention that some of Garrus' more animalistic behavior in some scenes have caused panic attacks for victims of abuse. I am so sorry for anyone who had a similar reaction. SO sorry. I would like to make any new readers aware of this beforehand. Thank you.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 51 - Words: 220,428 - Reviews: 1572 - Favs: 2,504 - Follows: 1,406 - Updated: 11/11/2014 - Published: 10/6/2011 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
Watch the World Burn by atree reviews
The Avatar protects the people. Who protects the people from the Avatar? [She places her nails on his chest. "I want to hear you scream."]
Legend of Korra - Rated: M - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,465 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 19 - Published: 10/31/2014 - Korra - Complete
The First Time by Rae D. Magdon reviews
It is not the first time she has caught herself staring at Asami's face... (Korrasami, takes place on the blimp ride in the Season 3 Finale)
Legend of Korra - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,788 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 72 - Published: 10/23/2014 - [Korra, Asami S.] - Complete
Of Sheep and Battle Chicken by LogicalPremise reviews
My AU retelling of ME1 in a darker, sinister universe. Much darker and more realistic views of the SA and the Citadel Council, a more dangerous, involved Cerberus, and a more conflicted Saren and Benezia. Changes much of the ME1 dynamic to remove plot holes with more focus on politics, military strategy, and space combat. Pairing is FShep/Liara. Rewritten through Chapter 65 so far.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Angst - Chapters: 123 - Words: 745,723 - Reviews: 1538 - Favs: 1,333 - Follows: 987 - Updated: 9/22/2014 - Published: 4/13/2012 - [Shepard, Liara T'Soni] Garrus V., Illusive Man - Complete
Why Detective, You Shouldn't Have! by LibraMoon reviews
Shepard just wanted to drink the rejection away. Until Detective Chellick asked for her help. It wasn't supposed to be like this! Fem/ShepxGarrus Jealous Garrus, and mentions of onesided Garrus/Tali
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 63,290 - Reviews: 354 - Favs: 461 - Follows: 573 - Updated: 7/22/2014 - Published: 7/19/2011 - J. Garson, Garrus V.
Mock Effect 3 by ClintJohnston25 reviews
Sequel to Mr. Buch's masterful mockery of the first game and my continuation of it. The Shepard twins are trying to save the galaxy, loosely following the game "Mass Effect 3"'s script. Jane tries her best to be a paragon, whilst overcoming John's renegade tendencies and the frustrations of being in command of what has to be the oddest crew ever assembled. (Image Credit Saq02)
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 40,022 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 5/21/2014 - Published: 12/10/2012 - J. Garson, Shepard
Duende by fourthage reviews
Blowing off steam takes less time than Garrus anticipated and now he's adrift.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,373 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/1/2013 - [Garrus V., Shepard] - Complete
Angseth by Cheshire Kat24 reviews
Twenty years after the Aether incident, Angseth, the sole survivor, is now a battle cruiser captain on the verge of retirement. A routine mission uncovers evidence of an intergalactic conspiracy that only Samus Aran can unravel. But the Hunter is missing, and Angseth will risk everything she holds dear to find Aran and set the galaxy right.
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 32 - Words: 303,621 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 10/6/2013 - Published: 1/7/2013 - Complete
See You Next Mission by Insomniac and Floyd reviews
Even legends have to start somewhere. An exploration of Samus Aran's rise from obscurity to greatness through a collection of independent, interconnected stories. (Fans, old and new, are encouraged to follow, favorite, and review.)
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 15 - Words: 92,325 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 92 - Updated: 6/25/2013 - Published: 5/12/2005
Mass Effect 3: The Miracle at Palaven by Sudentor reviews
In the Galactic Codex, 278 words are dedicated to the Miracle at Palaven. They could never hope to encompass the despair, the ingenuity, the desperation, the spirit, and the valor of this unprecedented operation. Join historian Arena Nyscirius as she documents the failures and triumphs of what is now considered a major turning point of the Reaper War. Do you believe in miracles?
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Suspense - Chapters: 9 - Words: 75,783 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 268 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 6/4/2013 - Published: 4/15/2013 - Kal'Reegar - Complete
Reminiscence by anonymous moose reviews
"Primarch Vakarian? Uh, sir? I'm here to ask you about Commander Shepard." Shepard/Vakarian.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 46 - Words: 104,927 - Reviews: 428 - Favs: 622 - Follows: 696 - Updated: 4/6/2013 - Published: 4/6/2012 - Garrus V., J. Garson
Meet Us at the Bar by satsumio reviews
Waiting around for something to happen isn't always the best option. Sometimes you have to hold your glass high and tell Death to shove it. Just a cute little thought that wouldn't leave me alone. M for alcohol and coarse language.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,121 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/2/2013 - J. Garson, Shepard - Complete
Ugly Like a Turian by fourthage reviews
Thanks to some eavesdropping, Shepard discovers that Garrus's scars do not go over well amongst his own kind. She thinks his kind is full of it, and sets out to prove that to Garrus.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,365 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 271 - Follows: 25 - Published: 2/11/2013 - [Garrus V., Shepard] - Complete
The Night Spirit by Neutral Ground reviews
Also known as Batsami Begins. In the aftermath of Amon's rebellion, Republic City is left in ruin. The question the Equalists posed was never answered, and now crime and war are surging. A new evil is rising, and the old protectors of Republic City cannot stop it. Now is the time for Asami Sato to take up the mantle of the Batwoman, and show this city that it's still worth saving.
Legend of Korra - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 7 - Words: 52,528 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 1/19/2013 - Published: 8/13/2012 - Asami S., Chief Lin Beifong
Movie Night on the Normandy SR2 by Blackdeer7 reviews
Takes place after ME2 and LotSB. The title says it all. Lakota Shepard's crew watches and reviews various movies. Latest review - Saving Private Ryan 'Nuff said.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 12 - Words: 32,338 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 203 - Follows: 185 - Updated: 1/15/2013 - Published: 1/9/2011
A Family Affair by servantofclio reviews
"Welcome to the Vakarian family, Commander Shepard." "What?" she said blankly. It's a strange awakening, when you're in the company of strangers who treat you as family. Post-ME3.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 17 - Words: 37,818 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 434 - Follows: 253 - Updated: 11/24/2012 - Published: 6/27/2012 - [Garrus V., Shepard] - Complete
Shotgun as a Verb by paynoattention2 reviews
Shepard and Garrus spend some time hanging out on the eve of shore leave. Garrus wants to bring wine, but Shepard has other plans. Fluffy.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,828 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/13/2012 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
Fast Times at Citadel High by ChronicallyinFlaming reviews
Written for the mass kink meme. High School AU. Shepard, the star athlete of her school that lacks any social graces, falls in love with quiet, bookish Liara.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15,432 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 26 - Published: 10/28/2012 - Liara T'Soni, J. Garson - Complete
No Exploding by ChronicallyinFlaming reviews
Written for the mass kink meme. In an AU where Eden Prime went according to plan (no Saren, no exploding beacon), Liara and Shepard meet during a high-class social gathering related to this new prothean discovery.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,653 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/12/2012 - Liara T'Soni, J. Garson - Complete
Guide to Males by ofalldays reviews
Jinora has always been terribly awkward around people of the opposite sex. After discovering a book that contained many faulty errors, she makes it her duty to correct the book and write the true guide to males.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 28,310 - Reviews: 156 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 10/5/2012 - Published: 6/8/2012 - Bolin, Jinora
Variations on a Theme, with Tank and Gunfire by servantofclio reviews
Shepard finds herself reliving the last few years, from the beacon on Eden Prime to the battle on Earth. Again, and again, and again. How much can she change? How much should she change? M for language, occasional sexual situations.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 38,574 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 595 - Follows: 170 - Updated: 9/28/2012 - Published: 9/6/2012 - [Garrus V., Shepard] - Complete
The Perks of Working Late by fourthage reviews
Shepard and Garrus reconnect after Menae and James is an accidental witness. The sex he's good with, it's what comes after that makes him uncomfortable.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,263 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 18 - Published: 9/9/2012 - [Garrus V., Shepard] James V. - Complete
This Calls For A Drink by mandrakefunnyjuice reviews
It was common knowledge that Commander John Shepard, N7 marine, first human Spectre, proud fiend of slavers, grudging savior of the galaxy, professional armed lunatic and notorious bamf, would do almost anything for a decent drink. Rated M for Manly. Chapter 7: Special Tactic Minsc.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Parody/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 53,859 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 8/10/2012 - Published: 7/24/2011 - Shepard
Take the Sky by Knightfall1138 reviews
After several terrorist attacks on Alliance facilities, Malcolm Reynolds and his crew get caught in the middle of a conflict he had convinced himself was long dead.
Firefly - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Western - Chapters: 21 - Words: 43,179 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 7/29/2012 - Published: 5/26/2010 - Mal - Complete
Silence by TinyElephant reviews
ME3 SPOILERS. Post-Destroy. There's no room for war heroes in peace time. A shattered, exhausted Shepard expected to die. Vega and Cortez, the only ones left of her old crew, won't let her.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 29,617 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 7/21/2012 - Published: 4/16/2012 - J. Garson, Kaidan A. - Complete
Mom by quondam reviews
Third story in the 'Uncle' and 'Dad' trilogy. Already mother to two human daughters, Shepard encounters unique circumstances involving a Turian child while working as an advisor to the new Council. From MEK on LJ.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 38,253 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 169 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 7/3/2012 - Published: 6/12/2012 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
Commander Shepard is Easily Distracted by Knightfall1138 reviews
Earth is burning, and Commander Shepard is the galaxy's only hope for repelling the Reaper invasion. Perfect time to catch a movie.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Parody/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 16 - Words: 31,837 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 6/29/2012 - Published: 4/2/2012 - Shepard, Marauder Shields - Complete
The Other Way Around by quondam reviews
When Shepard wakes after surviving the Catalyst, she has to come to terms with the fact that Garrus isn't there waiting. Prompt from MEK on LJ.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,960 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/20/2012 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
The Shepard Code by quondam reviews
Set Post-ME3 where Shepard chooses Control. A hundred years after the Reaper War, a Turian ship captained by the grandson of Garrus Vakarian comes across a derelict Reaper inhabited by a hologram of Commander Shepard.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,111 - Reviews: 136 - Favs: 691 - Follows: 144 - Published: 5/5/2012 - Garrus V., J. Garson - Complete
Dad by quondam reviews
Sequel to 'Uncle.' Garrus and Shepard finally settle down and become parents, despite all the struggles that come with it.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 26,438 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 28 - Published: 5/5/2012 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
Uncle by quondam reviews
Three years after the end of the Reaper War, Shepard and Garrus visit Palaven to meet Garrus' nephew. While there, they're forced to assess who they are now, and what they want for their relationship together. Prompt from MEK on LJ.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 16,132 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 34 - Published: 5/5/2012 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
The Jedi Kind of Had it Coming by Sarah1281 reviews
All Revan wanted was to avoid any and all responsibility but the Force drags him back to the middle of the action once more. The Exile is probably the most dedicated Jedi ever and so she'll need all the help she can get... Sequel to 'So Not My Problem.'
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 30 - Words: 95,727 - Reviews: 567 - Favs: 705 - Follows: 346 - Updated: 4/16/2012 - Published: 2/8/2011 - Exile/Meetra Surik, Revan - Complete
Good Days by servantofclio reviews
Even happy endings have their challenges. A look at Shepard and Garrus growing old together.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,026 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 10 - Published: 4/15/2012 - [Garrus V., Shepard] - Complete
Commander Shepard, You've Got Mail by Chi Kyoku reviews
Every day, starting when Garrus rejoins C-Sec up until the destruction of the Normandy, Shepard and Garrus exchange emails. After all, good friends stay in touch.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 42,626 - Reviews: 546 - Favs: 609 - Follows: 447 - Updated: 4/10/2012 - Published: 2/26/2012 - [Garrus V., J. Garson]
Mock Effect 2 by ClintJohnston25 reviews
Sequel to Mr. Buch's masterful mockery of the first game. The twins Jane & John Shepard are exploring the galaxy, loosely following the game "Mass Effect 2"'s script. Along the way they poke fun at the various plot holes/inconsistencies they encounter.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 22 - Words: 93,476 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 2/20/2012 - Published: 11/25/2011 - J. Garson, Shepard
Paint by Sookie Starchild reviews
Garrus and F!Shepard share a moment. Established relationship.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,047 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/17/2011 - [Garrus V., J. Garson] - Complete
So Not My Problem by Sarah1281 reviews
All Revan wanted to do was stay alive and try to get with Bastila, in that order. He doesn't want to save the galaxy and he's not looking to help everyone he meets. Tragically, he's surrounded by hero types that keep trying to drag him along for the ride.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 29 - Words: 99,156 - Reviews: 817 - Favs: 1,261 - Follows: 544 - Updated: 2/1/2011 - Published: 1/16/2010 - Revan - Complete
Improved Relations by noobcake reviews
The Citadel Council tries to tie Garrus and femShep up in an open-ended project to "improve relations" between turians and humans. They didn't expect the two to cut right to the chase. The turian Councilor is most put out. Crack fic, contains smut.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,969 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 305 - Follows: 33 - Published: 7/30/2010 - Garrus V., J. Garson - Complete
A Lemon Fic by Mister Buch reviews
Today I had to ask what a 'lemon' fic was, and it was explained for me. I read an example, and I was so impressed that I wrote my own. So here is a short about Commander Shepard in her quarters at night... but not alone...
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/3/2009 - J. Garson - Complete
Shadowstep: Dead and Hating It by Mister Buch reviews
Selected entries from the diary of Booch Mishtar, Cyrodiil's most irritable adventurer. Chronicling his rise to mediocrity in the Dark Brotherhood and his transformation into Cyrodiil's most irritable vampire.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 6,856 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 5/13/2009 - Published: 5/6/2009 - Complete
Nature's Bounty by Simbelmyne reviews
[MGS3] “Do you always go around eating suspicious-looking frogs, sir?” EVA, Ocelot. Implied SnakeOcelot, courtesy of EVA’s runaway imagination. Spoilers, language, one-shot.
Metal Gear - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,480 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 9 - Published: 2/26/2005 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Repairs, Retrofits and Upgrades reviews
A series of problems, and a series of solutions. Korra applies traditional methods, while Asami turns to more modern innovations. Sometimes, you can take things on faith. Other times, you have to be pragmatic. One isn't better than the other, but it doesn't always seem that way.
Legend of Korra - Rated: T - English - Spiritual/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 238,353 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 338 - Follows: 322 - Updated: 2/19/2016 - Published: 12/19/2014 - [Asami S., Korra] - Complete
Flock of Vandals reviews
Nine months before the geth attacked Eden Prime, Shepard was dishonorably discharged for assaulting a superior officer. Soon after, she established a working partnership with Zaeed Massani, and the duo proved to be the most effective mercenaries in the Terminus. But when a chance encounter with a certain asari spectre turns violent, everything goes straight to hell. AU.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 7 - Words: 68,980 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 191 - Updated: 10/25/2015 - Published: 12/12/2013 - J. Garson, Zaeed M., Aria T'Loak, T. Vasir - Complete
Unsure Footing reviews
They beat Hiroshi; knocked him out cold. And Bolin thought that maybe, just maybe, that would be the end of it. That the war was over. They'd ride down the mountain side, get back into town, turn him in to the police, and that would be that. It wasn't. He woke up.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,133 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/27/2015 - Bolin, Asami S., Hiroshi S. - Complete
Addendums, Additions and Appendixes reviews
A series of short, non-chronological one-shots that take place at varying points during "Repairs, Retrofits and Upgrades". Mostly cut content and deleted scenes that either messed with the flow of the story, or wouldn't fit anywhere else. Cover art by RosetheRabbit!
Legend of Korra - Rated: T - English - Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,487 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 24 - Published: 2/16/2015 - [Asami S., Korra]
Bust Some Heads reviews
Self-defense was always a misnomer. For Asami, 'counter and overwhelm' is a far more accurate summation. When her front door explodes, again, from a barrage of firebending, again, Asami is elated. The triads are invading her home. Again. It's a twisted kind of wish fulfillment, but she doesn't care. Last time, she was a helpless little girl. This time, she'll make them pay.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,572 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/24/2014 - Mako, Chief Lin Beifong, Asami S. - Complete
Stick the Landing reviews
It's an impossible dilemma. The Champion of Kirkwall, or one of the Grey Wardens who brought an end to the Fifth Blight. One must live, and one must die. At least, that's what all conventional logic would suggest. Fortunately, the fade isn't too keen on logic. Or unwelcome guests. As far as it's concerned, they can both be thrown out the window.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,062 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 24 - Published: 12/2/2014 - [Alistair, Cousland] Bethany H., unknown 1
Breaking News reviews
Coronations don't happen everyday. They're a pretty rare event, so it's only natural that it's the most tuned in broadcast of the year. It was also to be one of the most memorable in history, if Kuvira has anything to say about it. And she really does have the words. Quite a few choice ones, in fact. As for everyone else...well, they really should have seen this coming.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,210 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/22/2014 - Asami S., Bumi, Senna, General Iroh - Complete
Sandstorm reviews
Fourteen months after her departure from Zaofu, Kuvira and her forces prepare to breach the outer wall of Ba Sing Se from the edge of the Si Wong Desert. Her plan of attack is sound, and her army more than qualified to crush any and all resistance. In hindsight, Kuvira should have realized that the Dai Li would be ready for her. They always were.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,092 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 19 - Published: 10/15/2014 - Bolin, Varrick, Baatar, Kuvira
The Cactus reviews
On her journey through the Earth Kingdom, Korra finds herself lost in the desert without any water. At some point, Katara had told her something about water being found in the cacti of the Si Wong. The specifics elude her, so she just decides to boil away anything that might be poisonous before drinking it. Everything was going pretty well until Asami appeared out of thin air.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,493 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 20 - Published: 10/13/2014 - Korra, Asami S. - Complete
You Can't Fix Everything reviews
Asami has always considered herself a mechanic of sorts. If something was broken, she could fix it. After two years of no contact, Korra finally writes her, and only her, a letter. In it, she describes that part of her is broken. Maybe it was the fire whiskey, or the shock of Korra's vulnerability, but Asami decides that she's going to fix everything. Well, try anyway.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,162 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 22 - Published: 10/11/2014 - Asami S. - Complete
Daddy's Little Girl reviews
Korra had always been her father's daughter. Zaheer was well aware of that. When she had been forced to watch, helplessly, as he murdered him, tossing him off of the peak without ceremony and plummeting to certain death, he assumed that it would weaken her resolve. Break her. He could not have been more wrong.
Legend of Korra - Rated: T - English - Family/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,489 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/8/2014 - Korra, Tonraq, Zaheer - Complete
Balance, Interrupted reviews
The world has told Korra, time and time again, that they don't need their Avatar anymore. Now, essentially stripped of her already weakened identity and purpose in life, she's starting to agree. Thankfully, the Spirit World has a knack for guiding the lost toward the right path, even if it needs a little help now and then.
Legend of Korra - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,715 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 10 - Published: 9/30/2014 - Korra, Jinora, Kyoshi, Yangchen - Complete
Don't Feed the Yao Guai! reviews
A collection of short stories taking place across the wastes. Told from the perspectives of everyone who ISN'T the Vault Dweller, the Chosen One, the Lone Wanderer, or the Courier. Updated randomly. Rated M for Cass.
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,047 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/12/2014 - Published: 3/10/2014 - Harold, Liberty Prime, Cass, Knight Captain Gallows
Breather reviews
Compared to the horrors of the Reapers, fighting Cerberus is a welcome vacation. For the crew of the Normandy, at least. Shepard and Garrus haven't had much time to explore their relationship beyond the physical, so they're taking the vacations anywhere they can find them.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,523 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 5/22/2013 - Published: 4/25/2013 - J. Garson, Garrus V.
Home reviews
As the united fleets converge on Arcturus to prepare for the final assault on the Citadel, Shepard struggles to find her place in a post-reaper galaxy. Lucky for her, Garrus knows exactly where she belongs. Home.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,324 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 8 - Published: 4/18/2013 - J. Garson, Garrus V. - Complete
Unfocused reviews
A suicide mission has a way of making one introspective of their entire existence. As the trip beyond the Omega-4 relay draws near, Shepard is forced to come to terms with her feelings for Garrus, along with everything else.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,001 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 6 - Published: 3/14/2013 - J. Garson, Garrus V., Samara, Dr. Chakwas - Complete