Name: Aisling

Favorites: IGGY , art ,maximum ride ,mortal instruments and Fang. (lets get Figgy with it, naw i'm just kiddin FAX all the way, well not all the way cause i fear lemons)

Food: Pancakes i don't know if that counts but now it does...

Drink: Cranberry juice WHAT ITS NICE!! (shifty eyes)

Shows/Manga: Fruits Basket, Death Note, Naruto,Bleach ,Wolf's Rain...I probably like some more, but I just can't think of any_

Classes: English,ART( IS A BANG AND SO IS DEIDERA)...yeah, just that...

Candy: Anything...SMARTIE COOKIES (IM A sick sick addict) O/-\O

I am against animal cruelty and if you watch this video you will to and let me just say it wrong and one of the signs of a mentally ustable and dangerous person is if they are cruel to animals her the link.

http:///index.asp

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing tip the can; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this crap, anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."

17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

33. Take bets on the battle described above.

34. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: "Marco Polo."

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.

45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

46. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.

47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

BONUS Attempt all of the above during the same visit.

(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Put a glassful of water in your mouth and see how long you can keep gargling for. Award yourself extra points for loud and amusing gargling noises, and minus points if you laugh.

Stare at the back of someone's head until they turn around
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
This works on the "I have the feeling I'm being watched" principle. Conduct an experiment-does this really work?

Have a "Who is less competitive" competition
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Trying to win at this will make you lose. Trying to lose makes you win which makes you lose. Not trying at all makes you lose which makes you win which makes you lose.

Pick up a dog so it can see things from your point of view
(Amusement Potential: 3-5 minutes)
Think about it: your dog has only seen the house from a viewpoint from 6" to 2' high (15 to 60 cm for all you metric fans). It's never seen the tops of counters, what you keep on your desk, the tops of shelves, etc. Try looking at things from its point of view, too.

Pull out a hair, stick in someone's ear
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
Best done to sleeping people. Added challenge in having no one else around, because then you can't blame it on anyone else. Try to beat your record number of times before the person catches on.

Pour water in hand, make sneeze noise, throw water on back of person's neck
(Amusement Potential: 5-15 minutes)
Always a good gag. For an even bigger reaction out of the person, act like you're not sorry at all for what they think you did. Comment instead on how big that sneeze was or about how there was a lot of mucus in that one.

not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.
not talk to fictional characters in public.
not answer fictional characters in public.
not talk to inanimate objects in public.
not go out in public.
6.Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.
7.Note expressions.
8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.
9.Floor is slippery when wet.
10.Lake is slippery when dry.
11.Only talk to strangers you know.
12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all.
13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note.
14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.
15.Kill them for security purposes.
16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings.
17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible.
18.The men in white coats are not your friends.
19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects.
20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.
21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning.
22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.
23.Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age.
24.Always remember, um... um... Damn.
25.Train army of flying monkeys.
26.Goldfish don't like milk.
not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.
28.Find out who invented the word "pianist".
29.People are staring at you.
act insane.
31.People are weird, but not as weird as me.
not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth.
33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.
34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experiance. Do this as much as possible.
'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding.
36.Never pet a burning dog.
37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you are wearing a parka.
38.Naked men dig parkas.
39.Beware the naked man who offers you his parka.
know what would look good on you?
41.Immolated cockroaches.
42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.
43.The size of Danny DeVito.
44.Making an amusing facial expression. Like this.
45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.
46.Stalking is fun. Do it more.
47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!"
matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world.
49.That way is rum.
50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t.
cannot kill the snow.
53.The snow can kill you.
54.Grass can also kill you.
55.The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms...
56.Catch and castrate leprechaun.
57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say.
58.Staple paper in the middle of the page.
case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.
are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that.
61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs.
not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon.
63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?
64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork.
65.Remember to kill HIM...
66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.
67.Note reactions. Avoid parents.
68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.
69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give you a shot of something nice.
70.Hide the bodies, otherwise peole ask embarressing questions.
the evidence.
72.But not if it's broken glass.
73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run.
not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids.
75.Disregard last note.
76.Note reactions.
77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year.
78.Stock up on ball point pens.
79.Learn to fly. Tell no one.
80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.
not stick fingers into blender.
82.Blender... Bad... Ouch.
83.Blood loss is bad.
84.Find way to re-attatch fingers.
85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.
86.Answer every question with a question.
87.Ask people what gender they are.
88.Note reactions.
89.Refer to people as "mortal".
90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.
91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.
92.Start by drowning them in fire ants.
93.Find the creators of pop-up messages.
94.Kill them.
95.Brutally.
96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.
97.Dunk head in boiling water.
98.Disregard last note. Was written by Voice #7.
99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling!
100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down...
101.Find out who invented "Barny"
102.Kill them
103. Brutally
104.Find the creator of Naruto.
105.Threaten to kill them if they don't make more episodes.
106. Do not talk about evil plans out loud.
107.Catch anyone who heard about evil plans and kill them.
not say that out loud either.
109.Kill all witnesses.
110.Make sure you have enough space to hide all the bodies.
111.When bodies start to smell buy airfreshener.
112.If that doesn't help hide bodies else where.
113.If that doesn't work burn them.
114.Disreguard one above that doesn't help.
If you love sasusaku, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate nejihina, copy and paste this into your profile.
If your family wonders how you can remember the names of Naruto characters, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that Tenten is awesome and deserves more screentime, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to slap Naruto for not noticing Hinata, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to slap Sasuke for leaving Sakura, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to slap Kabuto for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to rape the Uchiha brothers, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that says Pull or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate Karin from Naruto and hope she dies at the hands of Sasuke, Sakura, or both, copy and paste this into your profile.
If your idea of a party is gorging on pizza and cracking stupid jokes with your best friends, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're ever hyper for no reason at all, love being hyper, and are at this very moment hyper, copy and paste this onto your profile, and then go streak down the street, you sexy hyper thing you! heheh, sorry, sugar...
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so wrapped up thinking about anime, anime fan art, or anime fan fictions that you zoned out and came back to reality 5 minutes or more later with no idea what’s going on, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list. Athame Kunoichi, Sugarmonkey778, A Ninja Named Frank, shadow of the abyss, Narora, Catdemon-ninja, MissPinoyz, Lala Girl in Lala Land, akatsuki-cloude, Bri Nara, Pendragon1

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, StarDragon411, Mystic Katt, TrueThinker, Softballgirl9411,Witchdoctor42, Catdemon-ninja, MissPinoyz, Lala Girl in Lala Land, akatsuki-cloude, Bri Nara, Pendragon1

If you believe teenagers are stereotyped, put this on your profile.

If you absolutely LOVE to sing even though you may or may not suck, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get annoyed by people flaming random artists on youtube saying that their music sucks, that get pissed when you tell them not to listen to their music if they hate it so much, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever spun around in a chair and gone, "WEEEEE," copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you think Japan is cool copy this to your profile

If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away then remebered, copy this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you've ever had a conversation with yourself, copy and paste this on your profile.

90 percent of teens would have a breakdown if Miley Cyrus was standing on the edge of a 6 story building. Copy and paste this if you'd be one of the 10 percent yelling jump!

95 Percent of teens would have a breakdown if The Jonas Brothers were standing on the edge of a tower ready to jump, copy and paste if your a part of the 5 who would bring a lawn chair and popcorn!!

If you think that -/_\- looks like Itachi, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever burst out laughing in an empty room, paste this on your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who are smart enough not to, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile.

If you love Naruto so much you wish the characters were real so you could be one of them, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever crashed into a wall while sugar high copy and paste this on your profile.

If you think girls should rule the world and that it would be a better place copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever dreamed about being an Anime Character, copy and paste this into your profile.

I solemnly swear that anyone who flames my stories will get a flame back. FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE! BEAT OUT THE FLAMES! If you agree (or hate flamers) put this in your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that's weird. If you agree, copy/paste this into your profile.

BANANA PHONE! HA.HA.HAHA! post this on your profile if you are extremely random

If you have ever said that an anime character is sexy and you love them and you mean it, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the population would die if Johnny Depp said it wasn't cool to breathe. Copy this onto your profile if you would be one of the 2 percent that is laughing your ass off.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.

If you have ever considered going to the dark side since they have cookies, copy this onto your profile.

If you ever spouted a naruto character quote on command, copy and paste this into your profile. Yea, "Believe it!" and "Foolish little brother" when my bro was annoying meh!

If your family wonders how you can remember all the naruto character's names, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're obsessed with writing/reading fan fictions with an OCxCharacter coupling, copy and paste this.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile. "This is the song that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends. Some people started singing, not knowing what it was, then they kept on singing it forever just because..." -_-

If your profile is long, copy this onto it to make it even longer

If you have ever dreamed about being an Anime Character, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc. then copy this into your profile!

If you avoid teen fads and don't live your life according to others copy and paste this.

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile. Believe it!!

If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile. It was being slow!!

I once read that only math can save us now. Put this in your profile if you're screwed.

If you hear voices of the Naruto characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. My Inner appears from time to time...

Post this on your profile if you have ever had a major fan girl moment.

If you believe that Naruto is the Best Anime out there then copy and paste this onto your page to spread the word.. Narutards forever and ever!!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

Karin... Just when you thought you were too mature to hate a cartoon character. Copy and paste if you hate her too.

99.5 percent of teenagers and kids have a myspace and are literally addicted, if you are the 0.5 who thinks myspace is a dumb way to make friends, relationships, etc. post this onto your profile.

5 Truths of Life.

1. You cannot touch all of your teeth with your tongue

2. All idiots, after reading the first truth, try it

3. The first truth is a lie

4. You're smiling right now because you know you fell for it... (Idiot!)

5. You still have a stupid smile lingering on your face

Now, if you fell for it (I KNOW you did), copy & paste this into your profile.

Oh well… I already knew I was an Idiot .!

5 Truths of life:

1. You can kiss your elbow

2. You are now thinking you are not falling for that one again

3. You think you're so smart

4. The fact is that that is a lie

5. You are now trying to kiss your elbow

Annoying Things to do on an Elevator:

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"

2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.

4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5. Meow occasionally.

6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror "You one of THEM" and back away slowly.

7. Say "Ding" at each floor.

8. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push all the red buttons.

9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce "I have new socks on".

11. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

12. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers "This is my personal space".

13. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

14. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile and go back for more.

15. Ask if you can push the button for the other people, then push the wrong ones.

16. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?".

17. Drop a pen and whine until someone reaches to help pick it up. Then scream "That's mine!"

18. Pretend that you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

19. Swat at flies that don't exist.

20. Call out "Group hug" then enforce it.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .sSS... ... ..sS... ... ... ... ... ... ... . If you're a girl and you've ever
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... sSSS? ... ... .s..sS³ ... ... ... ... ... . beaten a guy in an arm wrestle,
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... ... ... ... ... ... ..sSSSS³.. ... .sS.. .SS³ . ... ... ... ... ... ... ... into your profile!
... ... ... ... ... ... . SSSSS... ... ... sS³... ³S.. ... ... ... ... ... ... . (sorry guys, girls only)
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Karin is so ugly, not even Naruto can believe it!
Karin is so fat, not even the byakugan can see through her.
Karin is so stupid, she took a shit thinking it would open the 8 inner gates.
Karin is so old, Gai dropped his 'Power of youth' philosophy on the spot.
Karin is so ugly, when she passed by Hinata, Hinata yelled 'Daaayuummmmm!'
Karin is so ugly, Itachi felt like his eyesight was diminishing when he saw her.
Karin is so ugly, she made Jiraiya too scared to peek again when he saw her.
Karin is so fat, she made fun of Chouji saying he was 'skin and bones'.
Karin is so ugly, Kakashi voluntarily gave her his mask.
Karin is so stupid, she couldn't find any of the 'hidden' villages.
Karin is fat, it took a whole beach for Gaara to use his Sand Coffin on her.
Karin is so ugly, the Kyuubi fled in fear.
Karin is so ugly, it's forbidden just to transform into her.
Karin is so fat, Tazuna considered using her as the bridge to the mainland.
Karin is so ugly, When Orochimaru saw her, he suddenly felt good about himself.
Karin is so fat, not even Zabuza's sword could cut through her in one hit.
Karin is so ugly, when the other girls saw her, they all ran for Lee.

THE WE HATE KARIN CLUB:If you hate Karin from NARUTO, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Pink Crescent Moon, Miyako-hime, XSakuraHarunoX, I'm in love with a Uchiha23, Angel Of Cherry Blossoms, Cherrilatina, CherryBlossoms016, Rayray, Sakura the lover, Sasusakufan2357, Lina Mistress of Elements, xnarutoxrocksx, uchihasakurah26, Nokas-Kokas, NorthernLights25, KunoichruleALL, Kawaiiblossom94, dera-chan, Mai-'-Kawaii-'-Ai,Ebil Chameleon you.broke.a.promise, XweaponsXmistressX, Sakura-Sasuke-love-em' , SASUXSAKUFREAK, PinkBlossem, Shadow Princess CherryBlossoms,Coscat, LKakashiSXE, Darkened Immortal, when.my.eyes.meet.yours, Nokas-Kokas, CanadianSkye94,Purplecherry5, Yuga Xyunagi, REfreak, Sharingangirl001, Hinatakura , Sakuranata, SASU-SAKU4everandalways, shadowxblossomx,blueberry08, Micah Sakura, JaseyRaeLullaby, KooriRoxs, Hidden in Sunlight, Minimum Ride

95 percent of people would die if the Jonas Brothers jumped off a building. If your the 5 percent eating popcorn and yelling "JUMP MOTHER FUCKERS!" then copy and paste this into your profile ;)

F.E.A.R. Fuck Everything And Run

QUOTES:

Fang " I dig your army hairdo "

Fang "I could never be as Fangalicious as you'd want me to be"

Fang"Never underestimate the power of funny "

Blogger to Fang"Do you secretly want to be hugged ?" Fang "Doesn't everybody"

Fang " Hot , hungryand thankful not to have HIV o'clock "

"Holy (insert swear word of your choice here.)"-Fang-MR-AE

"Rowr!" -Fang-MaximumRide-SOF

"She offered to cook breakfast."-Fang-MR-SOF

You... are...a... fridge...with...wings...We're...freaking...ballet...dancers! ~Fang-MR-SOF

"Have you guys been playing in the toxic waste again? Been bitten by a radioactive spider? Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?" -Fang-FW

"I feel like pudding, Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain." -Iggy-AE

"I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahs!" -Gazzy-STWAOES

Gazzy " You malignant little fiends " ( those kids have some good lines )

Fang swerved closer to me, big and supremely graceful, like a black panther with wings. Oh, God. I'm so stupid. Forget I just said that. -Max-MAX

"South America. It'll be warm. They have llamas. You like llamas." -Max-MAX

"Those wacky Brits called fries 'chips'. And potato chips were 'crisps'. And cookies were 'biscuits'. I had no idea what real biscuits were called. Wangdoodles?" ~Max-MR-StWaOES

Jeb turned to her. "She's incorruptible." Bully for me. "At least by power." I said. "You haven't tried chocolate or cute shoes" ~Max and Jeb-MR-Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports.

"I'm hit, Max. They got me. I guess I'm gonna live fast, die young, and leave a beautiful corpse, huh?" Okay. In my experience, if you're really hit or seriously hurt, you don't say much. -Total and Max-MAX

"Your middle name is 'Charging Off.'" -Total-MAX

"It's lucky it's dark...I haven't blushed so much since Madame Pomfrey told me she liked my new earmuffs."
-Dumbledore-HP

"I believe misters Fred and George Weasley were responsible for trying to send you a toilet seat."
-Dumbledore-HP

"Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business."
"Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git."
"Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor." -The Maurader's Map-HP-PoA

"We could be killed or worse expelled." -Hermione Granger in first movie. Can't remember if it was in the book.

"I want to fix that in my memory forever, Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret..."-Ron-HP-GoF

"Aaaah, when two Neptunes appear in the sky, it is a sure sign that a midget in glasses is being born."-Ron-HP

"So, people, let's try to calm down a bit. Things are bad enough without inventing stuff as well. For instance, this new idea that You-Know-Who can kill with a single glance from his eyes. That's a Basilisk, listeners. One simple test: check whether the thing thats glaring at you has got legs. If it has, it's safe to look into its eyes, although if it really is You-Know-Who, that's still likely to be the last thing you ever do." -Fred Weasly- Deathly Hallows

"You need people of intelligence for this sort of mission...quest...thing."-Pippin-LOTR-FotR

" I'm confused " - Me ( I say this a lot, it's kind've like my catch phrase)

" You illage vidiot " - Aisling (my cousin )

" Me caveman,big fire " - Aisling

"Dude we can sell this for like 10 dollars" Aisling in a stoned american accent

" Hey Lucifer(me) I need my soul back I'm gonna need it for the weekend"-Aisling

" Sorry Antoine I sold it already "- Me

"Thats cool I'll just get one off ebay, (holds receiver away) Mam cool it it's just Aoife" - Aisling

" Will you please just get a brain"- my mam

"Does ebay sell those ?"- me

" I'm a ninjachaun!(a ninja/leprachaun) - me

"Holy Moses"- me

"Jesus, Mary and Shit ! " - me

" Oh Flaminco Dancers !"- Aisling

" Go, go, go Power Rangers" - my mam at traffic lights

"Let's get nakey"- Me and aisling ( you don't want to know)

"BOOB CANDY"- Me and Aisling ( once again you don't want to know)

"UNIBOOB"- Me and Aisling ( is anyone else seeing a pattern here ? A very worrying pattern?)

"Josephs coat"- Echo

"Moses staff"- Me

"Holy moley"-Me (somehow I always end up refering to the bible or holiness. I have no idea why)

"I blame you , if a meteor should fall from the sky and hit me I will blame you, if the ice caps melt i will blame you. In my mind you are single handedly responsible for global warming and/or the earths demise as we know it"- Me to Echo

" Jimminy cricket"-Me

"I have opinions of my own- strong opinions- but I don't always agree with them"- George Bush

" You're about as useful as a one legged man at an arse kicking contest"- Rowan Atkinson

"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."
Rodney Dangerfield.

"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"
Steven Wright

"If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either."
Dick Cavett.

"I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets."
Dave Edison.

"I'm so unlucky that if I was to fall into a barrel of nipples I'd come out sucking my thumb."
Freddie Starr.

No,please don't eat me. I have a wife and kids,eat them. - Homer

"Press any key to continue, where's the any key?" - Homer

Oh, man! We killed Mr. Burns! Mr. Burns is gonna be so mad! - Homer

"Did you get in a fight with the frying pan ?"-my mam "No"-me "Well then why didn't you clean it?"

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself everyone can see it but only you know the warm feeling it brings"- I can't remember who said this but they're funny whoever it is.

Dara O'Brian Quotes

" 3 arguements for the non-existence of god are: Firstly, take a look at yourself this is supposedly the man who invented sunsets and mountaintops , what kind of off day exactly was he having when he threw you together. Secondly, if we are made by god why do we occasionally bite the insides of our own mouths. It seems I have forgotten where my lips were and have incidently chomped on my cheek. I was so eager to eat that plate of pasta I have eaten through my own face. And finally arguement C the appendix. Why would he put it in you if it does nothing except randomely burst and kill you one day? It just sits there quietly and then "kill 'em, kill 'em now"."

"This is how evolution happened, basically there were a load of blind monkeys until one day aone eyed monkey wandered into the clearing and rode everything left, right and center and he was King of the monkeys 'til Mr. Feckin' two eyes sasheyed along. It's a wonder I'm not invited to more churches in Alabama to give that speech"

"Nowadays people take the Bible too seriously it's only the bible it's not gospel"

"A nutritionist is to a dietition what a toothyologist is to a dentist"

FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY: COPY and PASTE this if you started giggling, laughing, nodding your head, thought this was hilarious, ect., while you read this!

1. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR.

2. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.

3. CAN AN ATHEIST GET INSURANCE AGAINST ACTS OF GOD?

4. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?

5. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE.

6. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN "WHERE'S THE SELF-HELP SECTION?" SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.

7. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS??

8. IF A DEAF PERSON SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?

9. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?

10. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

11. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?"

12. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

13. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES?

14. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

15. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?

16. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

17. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS?

18. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

19. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?

20. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

21. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR?

22. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO?

23. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?

24. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?

25. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD LISP TO HAVE "S" IN IT?

26. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL PERSON IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES DO THEY BECOME DISORIENTED?