Hey, guys thanks for reading my stories and before I tell you about myself know one thing.

If you aren't going to say anything nice don't say anything at all.

Follow me on tumblr yourstrulyjane-doe

FEEL FREE TO SUBMIT PROMPTS ON ANY OF THE THINGS BELOW.

IN SEARCH OF SOMEONE TO BETA BECAUSE MY GRAMMARS TRASH.

Also, I went through this phase where I was like wouldn't it be funny to just copy and paste everything ever onto my profile. So, heads up. Most of this stuff is super old and I have changed viewpoints since then.

Well anyway I'm from Brazil. I currently live in America. My favorite bands are Panic! At The Disco! and NeverShoutNever. I also love Young Justice. I love it MORE than LIFE! Not really that was exaggerated but I do love it a lot. I really do Love Robin LOTS.

If I haven't updated in a while please remind me I forget.

The reason I have a super long profile is because I was bored one summer.

FAVORITE SHOWS: Young Justice, Legend of Korra, Teen Titans, Ouran High School Host Club, Avatar: The Last Air Bender, Winx Club, Sym-Bionic Titan, Xiaolin Showdown, Green Lantern, Psych, The Finder, Bones, One Upon a Time, Grimm, Lie to Me, White Collar, Sherlock, Elementary, Yu-Gi-Oh!,Hannibal, Sherlock, Arrow, Free! Iwatobi Swim Club, Teen Wolf, Naruto,Teeny Titans, Justice Leaugue, Justice League Unlimated, Static Shock, Doctor Who, Cardcaptor Sakura.

FAVORITE MOVIES: Avengers, Star Trek: 2009, Star Trek Into the Darkness, Batman Triology, Thor, Ironman Triology, Captain America, Toy Story Triology, Alice in Wonderland (Tim Burton), Alice, Alice in Wonderland (cartoon).

FAVORITE PAIRINGS: Young Justice: WallArt, SuperMartian, CheshRoy. Legend of Korra: MaKorra. Teen Titans: RavenBoy, CyBee. Ouran High School Host Club: TamaHaru. Avatar: The Last Air Bender: KatAang, Sokki. Sym-Bionic Titan: Illance, Octus/Kimmy. Xiaolin Showdown: KimRai. Green Lantern: CarHal, Aya/Razer. Pysch: Shawn/Juliet. Once Upon a Time: Emma/Graham, Emma/August, Emma/Hook. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: FITZSIMMONS. Free!: SeiGou, MakoHaru, RinHaru, Reigisa. Justice League (Unlimited): Batman/Wonderwoman, Huntress/Question.

FAVORITE BOOKS: Percy Jackson Series, Heroes of Olympus Series, House of Night Series, Vampire Academy Series, Kane Chronicles, The Gallagher Girls Series, Princess Dairies Series, Beautiful Creatures Series, Dead is Series, Princess for Hire Series, Once a Witch Series. (There's more I just have to remember.)

Bold ones apply to me.

YOUR GUY SIDE

xYou love hoodies.
xYou love jeans.
xDogs are better than cats.
xIts hilarious when people get hurt
xYou've played with/against boys on a team
xShopping is torture.
xSad movies suck.
xYou own/ed an XBox
xPlayed with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
xAt some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
xYou own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
xYou used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
xYou watch sports on TV.
xYou go to your dad for advice
xYou own like a trillion baseball caps.
xYou like going to high school football games.
xYou used to/do collect baseball/football cards.
xBaggy pants are cool to wear.
xIts kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
xGreen, black, blue, red, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
xYou love to go crazy and not care what people think.
xSports are fun.
xTalk with food in your mouth.
xSleep with your socks on at night.

TOTAL: 16

YOUR GIRL SIDE

xYou wear lip gloss/chapstick.
xYou love to shop.
xYou wear eyeliner.
xYou wear the color pink.
xGo to your mom for advice.
xYou consider cheerleading a sport. (IT'S NOT A SPORT!)
xYou hate wearing the color black.
xYou like hanging out at the mall.
xYou like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
xYou like wearing jewelry
xSkirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
xShopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
xYou don't like the movie Star Wars.
xYou were in gymnastics/dance. (does school count...?)
xIt takes you around/more than one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
xYou smile alot more than you should.
xYou have more than 10 pairs of shoes. (Three pairs of high-tops, and two pairs of UGG's)
xYou care about what you look like.
xYou like wearing dresses when you can.
xYou like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
xYou love the movies.
xUsed to play with dolls as a little kid.
xLike putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
xLike being the star of everything.

Total: 8

.:FIRE:.

You have a short temper.
You often act on your emotions without thinking first.
You are very competitive.
You like to play with fire.
You are not a strong swimmer or you can't swim at all
You prefer warm weather over cold weather.
You often lose control over yourself.
You can be quite reckless.
You sometimes hurt people without realizing it.
People have often called you insane.

Total: 8

.:WATER:.

You have a calm, laid-back personality.
You like to go to the beach.
You rarely get angry.
When you do get angry, you know how to control it.
You think before you act.
You are good at breaking up fights.
You are a good swimmer.
You like the rain.
You can stay calm in stressful situations.
You are very generous.

Total: 6

.:EARTH:.

You are physically strong.
You have a close connection with nature.
You don't mind getting dirty.
You form strong opinions on issues that concern you.
You could easily survive in the wild.
You care about the environment
You can easily focus on your work without getting distracted.
You rarely get depressed.
You aren't afraid of anything.
You prefer to have a strict set of rules.

Total: 4

.:AIR:.

You have a free spirit.
You hate rules.
You prefer to be out in the open rather than in small, enclosed spaces.
You hate to be restrained.
You are very independent and outgoing.
You are quite intelligent.
You tend to be impatient.
You are easily distracted.
You can sometimes be hyperactive and/or annoying
You wish you could fly.

Total: 8

.:DARKNESS:.

You spend most of your time alone.
You prefer nighttime over daytime.
You like creepy things
You like to play tricks on people.
Black is your favorite color.
You prefer the villains over the heroes in movies, TV shows, video games, etc.
You don't talk much.
You are atheist.
You don't mind watching scary movies.
You love to break the rules.

Total: 4

.:LIGHT:.

You are very polite.
You are spiritual.
When someone is in trouble, you never hesitate to help them.
You believe everything you see or hear.
You are afraid of the dark.
You hate violence.
You hope for world peace.
You are generally a happy person.
Everyone loves to be around you.
You always follow the rules.

Total: 6

Tied with Air and Fire cool.

I screwed up (?)% of my teenage life

[x] Gotten detention.

[x] Gotten your phone taken away in class.

[ ] Gotten suspended.

[ ] Gotten caught chewing gum.

[ ] Gotten caught cheating on a test.

Total: 1

[ ] Arrived late to class more than 5 times.

[ ] Didn’t do homework over 5 times

[ ] Turned at least 3 projects in late

[ ] Missed school cause you felt like it.

[x] Laughed so loud you got kicked out of class.

Total: 0

[ ] Got your mom / dad etc. to get you out of school.

[x] Texted people during class.

[x] Passed notes.

[x] Threw stuff across the room.

[x] Laughed at the teacher.

Total: 3

[ ] Pulled down the Fire Alarm.

[x] Went on Myspace , Facebook , Xanga , etc. on the computer at school.

[x] Took Pictures during school hours (summer school)

[x] Called someone during School hours.(summer school)

[x] Listened to an iPod , CD , etc... During class.

Total : 4

[ ] Threw something at the teacher

[ ] Went outside the classroom without permission.

[ ] Broke the dress code.

[ ] Failed a class.

[x] Ate food during class.

Total: 1

[ ] Gotten a call from school.

[ ] Couldn’t go on a field trip cause you behaved badly.

[x] Didn’t take your stuff to school.

[ ] Gotten a detention and didn't go.

[ ] Stuck up your middle finger at a teacher when they were not looking.

[x] Cursed during class loud enough so the teacher could hear.

Total : 2

[x] Faked your parents signature .

[x] Slept in class.

[ ] Cursed at a teacher to their face.

[x] Copied homework

Total: 3

Total : 14

Multiply times Three: 14(3) = 42

Here are 40 ways to tell if u are a dumb blonde. put x's in the box if it's true.
1 x Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking
2 x Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking
3 x You have run into a glass/screen door
4 You have jumped out of a moving vehicle
5 x You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks
6 x You have run into a tree/stop sign!
7 It IS possible to lick your elbow
8 You tried to lick your elbow
9 You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm
10 You just sang them trying to figure out if it is true.
11 x You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen
12 x You have choked on your own spit
13 You have seen the the Matrix and still don't get it.
14 x You didn't notice that in the the last question 'the' was spelled twice.
15 x You just looked at it
16 x You didn't notice in #14 "the" was spelled twice.
17 Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde
18 You have accidentally caught something on fire
19 You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes
20 x You have caught yourself drooling
21 x You've fallen asleep in a class
22 Sometimes you just stop thinking
23 x You are telling a story and forget what you were talking about
24 People are often shaking their heads and walk away from you
25 x You are often told to use your 'inside voice'
26 x You use your fingers to do simple math.
27 x You have eaten a bug as an accident.
28 You are taking this test when you should be doing something important.
29 x You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it.
30 x You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket.
31 You sometimes send chain emails because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you know it won't.
32 You break a lot of things.
33 Your friends know not to use big words around you.
34 x You sometimes tilt your head when you're confused.
35 x You have fallen out of your chair before.
36 When you're laying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling/wall..
37 The words 'umm' and 'like' are used many times a day!!
38 You called a friend and then completely forgot what you were gonna say.
39 You have spelled your name wrong.
40 x You have drawn a deformed heart.

20 good thing because I'm a brunette.

CHILD OF ZEUS

You like being in charge.
You often wish you could just zap someone with a thunderbolt.
You were voted Class President.
You do what’s best for everyone.
You think you have what it takes to run for President.
You think every problem has a solution.
You love showing off.
You like plane rides.
You have hydrophobia.

7/10

CHILD OF POSEIDON

You feel at home in the water.
Your favorite vacation place is at the beach.
You enjoy snorkeling, scuba diving, surfing, etc.
You want to do something about the marine species being abused today.
You visit the local pool on a regular basis.
You swim professionally.
You hate seafood.
You never get seasick.
You’d rather ride a boat than a plane.
You have acrophobia.

3/10

CHILD OF HADES

You’re not that much of a people person. You like staying in the dark and writing.
You experience bad moods on a regular basis.
You like listening to loud, angry music.
You spend most of your time alone.
You think parties are sometimes loud and annoying.
You like to keep to yourself.
All your closets are padlocked.
You write in diary/journal/blog.
You feel most active at night.

5/10

CHILD OF DEMETER

You own a garden. You like the great outdoors.
You have a green thumb.
You’re an environmentalist.
You have a special connection with animals.
You’re a vegetarian.
You like going hiking, camping, and looking at the natural wonders of the world.
You always check a product if it’s environmentally-friendly.
You love going to flower shops.
You think global warming is a threat that must be dealt with.

1/10

CHILD OF ARES

You often start fights. You’re a very aggressive type of person.
You like watching wrestling.
You’re competitive.
You like reading about war.
You don’t take rubbish from anybody.
You have anger management.
You never back away from a fight.
Everyone does what you say.
You don’t always think before you do something.

5/10

CHILD OF ATHENA

You have an insatiable thirst for knowledge. You’re probably the only person who visit the library on a regular basis.
Half of your Christmas presents last year were books.
You like reading about war, mostly about the reasons and controversies behind it.
You’re the valedictorian in your class.
You’ve never gotten a grade below 80 in your report card.
You get political jokes without asking people to explain them.
You think it would be better if you were the President.
You have a huge shelf of books at home.
You think vinyl pocket protectors are useful.

5/10

CHILD OF APOLLO

You’re very creative and artistic. You like listening to all kinds of music in general.
You always feel sunny and optimistic.
You are talented at drawing.
You like writing poetry.
You can play at least 3 musical instruments.
You like going to art museums.
You almost always win 1st Place in Art Contests.
You have straight A's in Art on your report card.
Your school notebook has more doodles than notes.

7/10

HUNTER OF ARTEMIS

You dislike boys in general. A deer is one of your favorite animals
You can shoot targets.
You like silver.
You like the moon better than the sun.
Zoe Nightshade is awesome.
You love wild animals.
You spend most of your time outdoors.
You love to move around the place.
Hunting is not cruel, if it's to hunt down monsters

4/10

CHILD OF HEPHAESTUS

You have a way with tools.
You build awesome things during your free time.
You’re the best at Woodshop in your class.
Metalworking is your forte.
You have your own toolbox.
You often search the Internet to look for pictures of robots.
You’re a techie.
You often have carpentry projects.
You dream of being a carpenter.
You aren’t afraid of fire.

2/10

CHILD OF APHRODITE

Every guy/girl swoons for you.
You like putting on makeup.
You naturally smell good.
You never experience a bad hair day.
Your favorite activity is clothes-shopping.
You’re always at the front of every trend.
You’re the popular girl/guy at your school.
You’re often invited to parties.
Your motto is ‘It’s never a party without me."
You look at yourself in the mirror on a regular basis.

1/10

CHILD OF HERMES

You like pickpocketing your friends.
You’re a prankster.
You’re a speed demon.
You consider yourself restless.
You’re the best speaker in the class.
You like thinking on your feet and using your wits.
You’re inventive and resourceful.
You often start arguments.
You’ve never lost a debate.
You like making witty and sarcastic statements.

8/10

CHILD OF DIONYSUS

You’re the life of the party.
You like wine.
You’ve probably tasted every alcoholic drink out there.
You can finish a martini in less than a minute..
You have a happy, cheerful disposition.
You’re a foodie.
You like going to social events and mingling with people.
You like trying out new food.
You feel that you’re abundant in life.
You think that too much of anything is bad.

7/10

I guess I'm a Hermes kid cool.

Copy and Paste Lines

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

95 percent of teens would cry if they saw the Jonas Brothers at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this EVERYWHERE if you are in the 5 percent that would shout 'Do a Back-flip!'

98% of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the two percent who haven't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're against animal cruelty, copy and paste this into your profile.

Drugs are bad news. Spread the word.

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your bio.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you wish anime people could come to life copy and paste this in your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you weird inside jokes with your friends that nobody understands and when you laugh about them they look at you funny. Copy and paste this to your profile.

If you want a fourth season of Xiaolin Showdown then put this in your profile.

If you're a fan of RAIKIM, put this in your profile!

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If you ran up a down escalator copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile

If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile

If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever busted a move/ burst into song, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you find it weird you're always the grand prize winner on those annoying adds, copy this to your profile.

If you know the difference between your and you're, copy this on your profile

If Justin Bieber went missing, 97% of people would search 2% would cry and if you are the 1% poking your new prisoner with a sharp stick then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like two reviews, copy this into your profile.

If you ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" copy this into your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile:)

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you love to laugh put this on your page

If you ever wondered who made up all of the 'copy this into your profile' things then copy this into your profile.

If FanFiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. Oh the irony...

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile!

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile.

COPY AND PASTE ONTO YOUR PROFILE IF YOU THINK PERCY JACKSON HAS AWESOMENESS RUNNING THROUGH HIS VEINS!

Justin Bieber falls off a building. 90% of the girls are crying. 9% are watching while eating popcorn. 1% are pushing Justin off the building. If you are part of that 9 or 1%, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't care when people make fun of you, but when someone makes fun of your friends you automatically think of numerous, painful ways to kill them, copy and paste.

1F Y0U C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463 C0PY 17 4ND P4573 17 1N70 Y0UR PR0F1L3.

Just because she once liked Percy doesn't make her the worst girl in the series! If you think people should stop hating on Rachel Dare, copy and paste.

If you've believed in WallArt before it happened and will FOREVER, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you sometimes say random things when you have no idea whats going on, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin, The Komodo Dragon Phoenix, Empress Caroline of Tamaran, monkyluvr, Darth KenObi-Wan, JediWolfMaster,EwanLuvr4Ever Hawkpath13, iSniffMarkers, YoursTrulyJaneDoe.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think up stories faster than you can write them and are too lazy to do that for most of them anyway, copy this to your profile.

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your profile is ridiculously long, copy and paste this into your profile to make it even longer.

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're." If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone their not, copy and paste this into your profile

For me, crazy is a VERY LOOSE term. Crazy is when your off in your own little world, and you start to think of something funny that could happen and start laughing, and the people around you turn around and stare at you because you're laughing for no reason. Crazy is also when you start dancing while walking down to your next class to a song you have stuck in your head. If you're crazy like me, copy this to your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

"I walk, talk, eat and sleep on earth, but I live my life in a completely different world." If this sentence describes you, copy and paste on your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you have ever attempted to high-five someone and missed completely, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you now say "I want my phone call", "Why so serious?", and "You wanna know how I got these scars?" at random points in the day, put this in your profile.

If you wanna WHACK the Cartoon Network people for canceling Teen Titans, COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE, GET A BAT AND FOLLOW ME!!

ºø„„øº „øº
ºø„ WALTEMIS „øº
„øº IS AWESOME!!! ºø„
„øº„øººø„ºø„

If you agree, copy and paste this on your profile!

If you are awesome, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're obsessed with Young Justice, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're obsessed with Wally/Artemis, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of the few people who actually reads profiles, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing, or a combination of both, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever snuck on fanfiction when you were supposed to be doing something else, say, your homework, copy and paste into your profile.

If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile.

„ºø„„øº„øº
ºø„ PERCY JACKSON „øº
„øº IS AWESOME!!! ºø„
„øº„øººø„ºø„

If you agree copy/paste this on your profile!

If you have annoying sibling(s), copy/paste this on your profile!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE, COPY/PASTE THIS ON YOUR PROFILE!!

If you love DC cartoons, copy/paste this on your wall!

If you are a proud Christian, copy/paste this into your profile

98% of the internet population has a MySpace. If you're part of the 2% that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

90% of teens will want to try a drug between the ages of 13-19. If you are one of the 10% that rather lose a limb before taking drugs, copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever had an argument with yourself, copy this to your profile.

If you've ever lost a bet to yourself, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever walked into a room to forget what you were doing, walk away and then remember copy this into your profile.

Paste this in your profile if you're a procrastination addict. (Or do it later.)

If you have ever been called a bookworm and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you should be doing your homework right now, instead of being on fanfiction, copy and paste this onto your profile.

IF you support the Fire Nation, put this into your profile

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was 'too small' and 'off its orbit' for a couple scientists' likings! If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile! LONG LIVE PLUTO!

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile.

If you are the complete opposite of normal, copy this into your profile

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile

Weird is good, strange, it bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this into your profile!

After over 50 years of scientific research, we found out the saying goes, "Girls rule and boys drool!"

99% of teen girls would absolutly FREAK if Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber got kidnapped. Copy and paste this in your profile if you're one of the sane 1% who would be happily poking their captives with a spork, while threatening to save the teen girl population. (You know what that means lol)

If you have way too many of these things, copy and paste this into your profile... or not, if you've run out of space.

Chocolate chip cookies are yummy! If you agree, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think girls and boys are equal human beings, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think hair color doesn't determine how smart you are, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your friends have ever called you evil, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you want a million dollars, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you want a billion dollars, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't care about politics, copy and paste this into your profile.

Did you konw taht you can raed mix-up wrods vrey esialy if the frist and lsat ltetrs are in the rgiht palce? If you could read that, copy and paste this into your profile.

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever laughed for 10 minutes straight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that people who don't like PJO are crazy/stupid/losers, copy this into yor profile.

If you've ever tripped over nothing, copy this into your profile.

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freaking' Trix, copy this into your profile.

If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

Some people are like slinkies...they're really good for nothing...but they still bring a smile to your face when you push
them down a flight of stairs. If you agree with this, put this in your profile.

If there are times where you annoy people just for the fun of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into
your profile.

( o.o )
(U U )

This is bunny. Copy and paste this bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination.

(.• (.• Pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.

If you have ever thrown something at a TV screen when you saw a character you despised, copy and paste this on your profile.

If your profile is long, copy this onto it to make it even longer.

Copy and Paste this to your profile if you have a crush on a Teen Titans guy.

Copy and Paste if your life is more complicated than pi.

If you are addicted to Fan-Fiction, copy this.

If you wish that fictional characters were real, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you were ever leaning against a door and it opened and you fell, copy and paste this to your profile

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you know there's more to good random humor than saying "cheese", "fudge", or "pie", copy and paste this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever said a number, but held up the wrong amount of fingers, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have an increasingly sophisticated and extensive vocabulary, situate this in your characterization.

If you love and I mean love to read, put this on your profile.

If you get way to excited for books, movies, etc. to come out, copy this into your profile

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you’ve ever made faces in front of a security camera then paste this in your profile

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you've read other people's profiles to copy and paste things, paste this into your profile.

If you like/love copying and pasting stuff into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

.5 million people are on the internet right now. If you are one of them, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever spent time just copying and pasting things onto your profile because you were bored, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

BEST FRIENDS DON'T LET OTHER FRIENDS READ TWILIGHT. If this is true for you, copy and past this onto your profile.

If you can listen to music for hours on end because it touches your heart, copy and paste this.

If you are a person who likes classics, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you love Christmas because of all the free stuff copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile.

If someone ever told you to stop cussing or else they'll make you eat soap copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your profile

If you ever fell off a chair back wards copy this into your profile

If you're a person who acts friendly, but has an evil mind and is planning to dominate the world, copy this to your profile.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are writing a book, copy this into your profile

If you have ever dreamed or imagined being a vampire or a werewolf, put this in your profile.

If you truly believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen), copy this into your profile.

If you are a teenager, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you listen to alternative rock, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think your insane because you say so, copy and pate this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

I do not do drugs. I do sugar. If you're someone who does sugar, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever burned any sort of food in the microwave, oven, toaster, or on the stove, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you get bored easily, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you would kill to have wings, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever tried to grow wings, copy and paste this too.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think 'morning people' should be driven off the face of the planet so they spread their 6-AM cheer to Martians, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you ran up a down escalator copy this into your profile!

If most of these apply to you, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think most teachers have no life, copy and paste this to your profile.

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, then add this to your bio.

95% of teenage girls are obsessed with Miley Cyrus and Demi Lovato, if your part of the 5 percent that isn't Copy and Paste this onto your profile!

90% of teens today would die if MySpace/Facebook/Twitter had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing, copy and paste this to your Profile.

80% percent of people don't know what the hell FanFiction is and won't care if it had a system failure. If you are the 20 percent who would die, freak out, have a nervous breakdown, or take it out on the furniture, copy and paste this to your Profile.

98% of teenage girls would die if Justin Bieber jumped off a building, 1% would be eating pop corn wearing 3D glasses screaming "hurry up already!", repost if you're the 1% that "convinced" him to jump off in the first place

If Justin Bieber went missing, 97% of people would search 2% would cry and if you are the 1% poking your new prisoner with a sharp stick then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think you can be pretty without being self-centered, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're a girl who's tired of people assuming that just because your a girl you love pink and can't fight to save your life, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile.

If you are call the weird one because you are seen typing fan fiction and you don't give a shit, paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wishes of being an only child, thought that you or your sibling was adopted because of vise/versa, or just done right hate your siblings, copy and paste this.

If you're obsessed with a character so much that you have dreams about meeting or fighting them, copy and paste this.

If you've ever pushed off a school project till the week before it was due and still got a good grade on it, copy and paste this

If you've ever laughed at your friend when they've done something stupid, copy and paste this.

If you hate it when those pretty sissy girls get all the attention and the tough girls are ignored copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your pretty different from others copy this into your profile.

If you hate labels/stereotypes, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you really hate it when you're doing something, and then get so close to finishing, and then fail, copy and paste this into your profile.

If Writer's Block and Disclaimers had a physical form and you would stab them to death, copy and paste this to your Profile

If you can't stand preppy people who talk like this: "I like, can't believe, I like, chipped my manicure!!", copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE copy this in your profile.

If you have been caught randomly dancing, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this; because in the Bible, it says that if you deny me, then I shall deny you before my Father in the gates of Heaven

ARE YOU CRAZY? IF SO, PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE!!!!!!!!!

Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, secilmis yazar, Holly Marie Fowl, FlyingToastersUnite, Cannibalistic Skittles, Arruby, fleurdelisdemigod, KanaeValentine, Newsiesgirllaces, CK4eva, FireZenzizenzizenzic, AdenaWolf, Ravenhearst, YJ-Lover, YoursTrulyJaneDoe,

A 15 year old girl holds hands with her 1 year old son. People call her a slut. No-one knows she was raped at 13. People call a girl fat. No-one knows she has a serious disease which causes her to be over weight. People call an old man ugly. No-one knows he had a serious injury to his face while fighting for our country in the war. Repost this if you're against bullying and stereotyping and add your name to the list. YJ-Lover, YoursTrulyJaneDoe,

Being unique is thinking outside the box, reading between the lines, coloring out of pictures, dancing to the tune of your own drummer, and having a heck of a better time than other people. If you're unique, you don't need this notice! (But you can still copy and paste this in your profile.)

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says 'If you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.'

If you solemnly swear you are up to no good copy and paste this into your profile.

／l、
（ﾟ､ ｡ ７
l、 ヽ
じしf,)ノ

Holy crap, Its CROOKSHANKS! Copy Crookshanks into your profile to help keep away Peter Pettigrew!

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

Copy and paste this on your profile if you've wondered why something wasn't working until you realized that it wasn't plugged in.

If you have ever yelled at an inanimate object copy and paste this into your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think I'm a nutjob don't copy this to your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes, copy and paste this into your profile.

EMBRACE THE WEIRDNESS! If you embrace the weirdness, then copy and paste this onto your profile

How can you fight a fire with fire?
How can you stop a flood with water?
How do we think violence will solve violence?
Copy And Past This To Stop Violence All Over The World. So We Have A World In The Future.

If you're the kind of person who laughs at something that happened the day before, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not, copy this into your profile

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP/STRANGLE someone, copy this onto your profile

If you ever walked into your closet randomly, hoping to find Narnia, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile.

If when you go to sleep you can hear songs that you haven't heard in three years copy this to your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile

If yo hte typds puty thid on y6our3 this into your profile (If you hate typos put this in your profile)

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you hate NejiHina copy this into your profile.

If you LOVE Naruto! Copy this on your profile.

PUT THIS ØИ ЧØUR PROF IŦ SØШЄßØĐЧ TØŁĐ ЧØU MΛИЧTIMЄS THΛT ЧØU WЄRE HØT.

If you have ever started humming a song that you have absolutely no idea what it is, put this in your profile.

If you know that Bella Swan is The Queen of All Mary Sues , copy-and-paste this into your profile.

If you make an effort to employ the use of sarcasm in your every day life, paste this into your profile.

If you're sick of the reality TV fad and just lame TV show plots in general, paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could meet the character of your choice, paste this into your profile.

If you've realized that the experience of writing fanfiction has helped improve the quality of your school papers, paste this into your profile.

If you're hopelessly addicted to chocolate , paste this into your profile.

If you appreciate the beauty of movie soundtracks and own at least one, paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a film, TV show, or anything of the like, can quote it word for word and do it at random moments, copy this into your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever cried when your favorite character in a movie, T.V show, or book died, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your against Drinking and Driving, Copy and Paste this to your Profile.

If you have ever wanted to slap someone, but restrained yourself, congratulations and copy and paste this to your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach, or The OC or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. ( Never heard of this shows)

If your idea of fun is reading, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you shiver at the thought of cigarettes, cigars, alcohol, pot, drugs, or anything like that, and it gives you nightmares copy and paste this into your profile.

Only fteefin prenect of poelpe can raed this. fI you are one fo taht prenect, cpoy and pstae tihs itno yuor porflie.

If you have ever conversed out loud with the voices in your head and had people look at you like you were insane, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.

Drugs are bad news. Spread the word. Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your profile.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

if you could read a 700 page book in a day copy and paste this in your profile.

98 of teenagers do drugs and drink alcohol. Put this into your profile in you are included in that 2% that doesn't, mainly because you are sitting at home, reading and being a good young child.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you have a teacher who doesn't know what the heck thy’re doing and you hate them because they annoy you paste this into your profile.

If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile.

IF YOU LOVE PERCABETH, COPY AND PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE!!!

IF YOU LOVE ZARTER, COPY/PASTE THIS ON YOUR PROFILE!!!!!!!!!

If you will always believe PERCY JACKSON is the best Greek hero of ALL TIME, copy/paste this on your profile!!!!

IF YOU LOVE RICK RIORDAN, HIS BOOKS AND CHARACTERS, copy/past this on your profile!

If you will always believe CARTER KANE is the best Egyptian hero of ALL TIME, copy/paste this on your profile!!!

If you want to see a Quidditch match copy and paste this into your profile.

If you cried during/after reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, copy this to your profile.

If you cried when Fred Weasley died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile.

If you're one of the few people who actually reads profiles, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love Harry Potter, copy this into your profile.

If you liked Snape (or at least honor him) after Deathy Hallows copy and paste this in your profile.

„ºø„„øº„øº
ºø„ CARTER KANE „øº
„øº IS AWESOME!!! ºø„
„øº„øººø„ºø„

copy/paste this on your page if you agree!

„ºø„ „øº „øº
ºø„ KATNISS EVERDEEN „øº
„øº IS AWESOME!!! ºø„
„øº„øººø„ºø„

copy/paste this on your page if you agree!

„ºø„„øº „øº
ºø„ PEETA MELLARK „øº
„øº IS HOT!!! ºø„
„øº„øººø„ºø„

copy/paste this on your page if you agree!

If you have annoying sibling(s) but still love him/her/them, copy/paste this on your profile!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE, COPY/PASTE THIS ON YOUR PROFILE!!

If you're going to miss Harry Potter copy/paste this on your profile.

If you love DC cartoons, copy/paste this on your profile!

If you truly believe, there is a John Quinn or Ash Redfern or James Rasmussen or Morgead Blackthorn or a Galen Drache somewhere for you (doesn't mean his name has to be the same) copy this into your profile.

If you think that Percabeth is the best pairing EVER! paste this to your profile.

If you think that the PJO series is the best series ever paste this to your profile.

If you have ever ran into a mirror, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over a pillow, copy this into your profile.

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever tried putting your hair behind your ears, and ended up poking yourself in the eye...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.

If u have a sister or brother who is a morning person, and u sometimes want to strangle them for waking u up at 6 AM on a SATURDAY because they turned on the TV in another room or something, copy this into your profile.

Copy and paste this into your profile if you and your BFFs watch movies just to laugh at them and make fun of them.

If you are a total clutz copy this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica(real name)(i always change my penname)(tehehehe) I'veComeToTakeYourCheese, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly (about 24 hours now not counting the few hours of sleep), Alleyanna Cullen,hugz.4.all.the.emo.boyz, WritingRocks6 (hoo yeah), GlindaFied26, XxXpurplelilyxXx Bookluvrxoxo, Daydreamer897, The Friendly Chupacabra, Shorty and KG Inc, SeaweedBrain013, CloudyAlore, XxxBeLLxXxGiRlxxX76, XDpercabethXD, SunnyBunnylove77, YoursTrulyJaneDoe,

„ºø„„øº„øº
ºø„ WALLART „øº
„øº FOREVER!!! ºø„
„øº„øººø„ºø„

If you have ever hugged someone only to realize that you don't know who they are copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have an army of flying monkeys at your command copy this onto your profile.

If you think that yogurt is not meant to be eaten with a spoon but with your mouth copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're down.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, LOSER!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, "DAMN! We messed up!"

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"

FRIENDS:Will think you're weird for having a crush on Robin.
BEST FRIENDS: Will be fighting with you over him.

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this!!

TO ALL MY FRIENDS:

1. When you are scared, I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

2. When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

3. When you are confused, I will use little words.

4. When you are sick, stay the heck away from me until you are well. I don't want whatever you have.

5. When you fall, I will point and laugh at your clumsy butt.

laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, I get a paddle boat and save your stupid...

7.When you smile, I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.

Father:"You’re in big trouble Miss!"
Child: "I didn’t do anything!"
Father: "YOU KICKED HIM!!"
Child: "It was an accident!"
Father:"In the Face...?"
Child: "My foot slipped..."
Father: "Five times?!"
Child: ...

Guy: Do you want a hug?
Girl: No.
Guy: Do you even know what I just said?
Girl: Yea.
Guy: What did I say then?
Girl: Do you want a hug?

Guy: Well, if you insist.

Female come-backs to
pick up lines

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.

Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

Man: I'd go through anything for you.
Woman: Good! Let's start with your bank account.

Man: So, wanna go back to my place ?
Woman: Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book.

Man: But I don't know your name.
Woman: That's in the phone book too.

Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not Enter

Man: Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason.
Woman: Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

Man: Haven't we met before?
Woman: Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

25 Things I owe to my Mother

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you two are going to kill each other, at least do it outside. I just finished cleaning!"

2. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week."

3. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you aren't coming to the store with me!"

5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.

6. My mother taught IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

7. My mother taught me about THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

9. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

10. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"Your room looks like a tornado went through there!"

11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it too!"

13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

14. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children around the world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

15. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home!"

16. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You're going to get it when we get home!"

17. My mother taught me about MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way!"

18. My mother taught me about ESP.
"Put your sweater on! Don't you think I know when you're cold?"

19. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When the lawnmower cuts off you toes, don't come crying to me!"

20. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

21. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

22. My mother taught me about MY ROOTS.
"Shut that door! Do you think you were raised in a barn?"

23. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you're my age, you'll understand."

24. My mother taught me JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

25. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to your mother ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which button to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.
If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696969696969696969696.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, and date of birth, social security number and your mother's maiden name.
If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you. Repost this if you wish you were the one who recorded the voice mail...

Things that changes color:
Leaves
Chameleons
Fruit
Animal coats
Flowers
Michael Jackson

Funny Phobias

Arachibutyrophobia: Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. (PEANUT BUTTER ROCKS) ((Update: I don't know why I ever wote this I'm allergic to peanut butter))

Alektorophobia: Fear of chickens. (Chickens?)

Anatidaephobia: the fear that somehow, somewhere, a duck is watching you. (Hahahahahahahahahahahaha I love this one!)

Bibliophobia: Fear of books. (How can someone be afraid of BOOKS!!!!!!!!!)

Dextrophobia: Fear of objects at the right side of the body (Wha?!?!)

Euphobia: Fear of hearing good news.

Geliophobia: Fear of laughter.

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: Fear of long words. (Ironic)

Pantophobia: Fear of everything.

16 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity.

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars, see if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put a garbage can on your desk and label it “IN”

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone is over their Caffeine addictions, switch to expresso.

6. Finish all your sentences with “In Accordance to the Prophecy”.

7. Don’t use any punctuation.

8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

9. Specify that your drive thru order is “To Go”

10. Sing Along at the Opera

11. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.

12. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

13. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I WON I WON!!”

14. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!”

15. Tell your children over diner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”

16. Send this to your friends to make them smile, It’s called therapy.

Stupidity:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (When else am I suppose to fix my hair?)

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (Great way to promote shoplifting!!!!)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (If I don't know how to use this soap what makes you think I'll know how to use regular soap?)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But remember..it's just a suggestion...)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late...)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Really?? I wasn't sure...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (I thought that's how you ironed your clothes..oops..honey, forget what I said about ironing your clothes!!)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (Yeah like kids really work in factories still...)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (You don't say!!)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (Where else would I use it.)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (And that would be...)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Dang and here I was hoping it wouldn't.)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Good thing I have these instructions. I had no idea what to do.)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (Sure, go ahead and crush another child's dreams!!!)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (Then I'll just stop it with any other body part.)

On a hair straightener: "Do not use in water." (Yeah, I really want to straighten my hair while I'm washing it!!!)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions: "Put on fork and eat." (What if I don't want to eat it?)

On a can of bug spray:“Harmful to bees”. (I thought it was harmful to ants)

On a life-saving device: “This is not a life-saving device”. ( Then what is it? Note to self, don't buy from this company.)

On a TV remote control: “Not dish washer safe”. (So that's why it won't work anymore...)

A New Zealand insect spray "Not tested on animals." (Obviously.. you tested it on insects, duh!)

A Television Owner’s Manual "Do not pour liquids into your television set." (People really get payed for writing this??)

A VCR box says "Instructional video on hooking up your VCR included." (How can you watch it????!!!!!)

A can of self-defense pepper spray "May irritate eyes." (Really???)

A can of windscreen de-icing spray "Spray works in sub-zero temperatures." (Good thing I was worried it wouldn't.)

A cardboard sun-shield that keeps sun off the dashboard "Do not drive with sun-shield in place." (Well, that explains a lot.)

A cartridge for a laser printer "Do not eat toner." (Awww... but it tastes sooooooo good.)

A computer mouse "Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." (Thanks for the idea!)

A container of underarm deodorant "Caution: Do not spray in eyes."

A dishwasher carries this warning "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher." (Oh...Sorry kids can't play in there anymore.)

A popular manufactured fireplace log "Caution - Risk of Fire." (What's it supposed to do...play music?)

A rubber ball toy "Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." (Isn't that why I'm buying it?)

A sharpening stone "Knives are sharp." (You don't say!)

A snowblower warns "Do not use snowblower on roof." (And how exactly am I supposed to get a snowblower on the roof?)

A baby stroller "Remove child before folding." (Oh. Better go get little Ricky out...)

A pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover."

An electric router made for carpenters "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." (Shoot.)

An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter "Do not use near fire, flame or sparks." (Okay... then how am I suppose to use it?)

A rock garden "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." (Ah.)

A Fruit Roll-Up snack "Remove plastic before eating." (That's why it doesn't taste good...)

On a bag of Marshmallows: "Flammable"

On a Coke bottle: "Shake well before use" (o_O)

Road sign: "Caution: water on road during rain." (Gasp!)

Dog food: "New and improved tasting" (who tests it?)

Hair coloring: "Do not use as an ice cream topping." (Dang it.)

Liquid plummer: "Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages."

Arm and hammer scoopable cat litter: "Safe to use around pets"

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD

PONDER THIS

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops. On my desk, I have a work station…
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Demotivators:

Change: It's never to late to turn over a new leaf, unless you're really really old and close to the end. Then yeah, it's probably to late.

Alignment: Good...Bad...I'm the girl with the gun.

Procrastination:Hard work often pays off after time, but laziness always pays off now.

Despair: It's always darkest just before it goes pitch black.

Cluelessness: There are no stupid questions but there are A Lot of inquisitive idiots.

Indifference: It takes 43 muscles to frown and 17 to smile but it takes none to just sit there with a dumb look on your face.

Insanity: It's difficult to comprehend how insane some people can be. Especially if you're insane.

Accomplishments: You can fool all of the people all of the time if your effects budget is large enough.

Achievement: You can do anything you set your mind to when have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor.

Adversity: That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.

Agony: Not all pain is gain.

Ambition: The journey of a thousand miles sometimes ends very, very badly.

Apathy: If we don't take care of the customer, maybe they'll stop bugging us.

Arrogance: The best leaders inspire by example. When that's not an option, brute intimidation works pretty well, too.

Blogging: Never before have so many people with so little to say said so much to so few.

Consulting: If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem.

I guess that just shows how much we think...

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

A moment of silence.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot. (Alot meaning all the time...) "It's not my fault!

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?') "Well there has to be a legitamate answer out there somewhere."

You live off of sugar and caffeine (not really)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week

You're e-mails tend to be long and incredibly random (sometimes)

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason.

15 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,

" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens

4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,

"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,

say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..

"NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

15. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

Ways To Annoy People In An Elevator

1)CRACK open your bag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air
in there?”

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting
off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open,
then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you
Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re
one of THEM” – and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when someone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have
new socks on.”

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other
passengers: “This is my personal space.”

14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the
shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back
for more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a
while, let the doors close and say “Hi Greg, How’s your day been?”

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then
scream: “That’s mine!”

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and
exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.

22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.

23) WHEN the lift is going down scream “we’re gonna die"

24) GRIMACE painfully smacking your forehead muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

25) WHISTLE the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

26) ON the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go 'plink' at the bottom.

27) HOLLER "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

28) WALK on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

29) WEAR a puppet on your hand and talk to the other passengers 'through' it.

30) LISTEN to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

31) ANNOUNCE in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

32) STOP at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.

33) MAKE farm animal noises.

35) START talking to the wall.

36) CARRY a stuffed animal with you and talk to it.

37) CARRY a small object and start petting it while saying "My precious." in a demonic voice then laugh like a maniac.

38) WHEN one person is on ask them if they want to pet your cat and then purr at them.

39) RIP your clothes and stumble on to the elevator and tell them that you just escaped from the mental ward and then laugh like a maniac

39 Ways to Annoy People at the Movie Theater

1)Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"

2)When the good guy gets killed, shout "good 'ridens"

3)During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"

4)Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.

5)Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.

6)Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.

7)Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.

8)Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.

9)Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.

10)Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.

11)Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming "it's alive!"

12)Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)

13)Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.

14)Try to start a wave.

15)Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.

16)Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"

17)Sing with the theme music.

18)At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."

19)Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.

20)Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.

21)Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"

22)Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.

23)When someone enters the theater in the mitle of the movie, stand up and yell "WERE THE HECK HAVE YOU BEAN, YOU MISSED THE BEST PART!"

24)When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"

25)Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.

26)Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"

27)Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.

28)Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"

29)Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.

30)Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.

31)Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.

32)During a love scene, stand up and run to the screen shouting "Hooters!"

33)Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.

34)Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"

35)Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer’s name is going to be said.

36)Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.

37)Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.

38)Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.

39)Pass by a room that’s showing a movie you’ve already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the ending.

10 Ways to creep out your roommate:

1) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, ''He just didn't belong.''

2) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

3) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, ''The hair, it's growing. Growing!''

4) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, ''Soon, soon...''

5) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

6) Tell your roommate, ''I've got an important message for you.'' Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, ''Oh, yeah, I remember!'' Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

7) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

8) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, ''Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?'' Complain loudly that you are hungry.

9) Every time your roommate walks in yell, ''Hooray! You're back!'' as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, ''Shouldn't you be going somewhere?''

10) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, ''No, I want to watch them suffer.''

Bad Things to Hear on an Airplane Intercom

1. This is your captain speaking and I don't feel that life is worth living anymore

2. We're cruising at an altitude of... Ah hell I don't know

3. Could somebody come up here and tell me what this button does?

4. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! Just kidding.

5. Would the fight attendant bring me a martini? And keep 'em comin'

6. This is... uh... This is... uh... your... Hmm, I seem to have lost my memory...

7. Passengers on the left side of the plane -- does that engine sound funny to you?

8. Good God Steve! We’re going to crash! Oops -- is this intercom on?

9. We'll be on the ground in ten minutes. One way or another...

These are some really funny things that you do to a pizza guy when you're ordering/paying.

1. While you are you are making an order, randomly start pressing the numbers on the phone and tell the guy to stop doing it.

2. Make up a credit card name and ask if they accept it.

3. Ask for a Big Mac, French fries and a Large Coke.

4. Finish the order with: "Remember, this conversation never happened".

5. Tell him you’ve got another pizza delivery on the other line and you’re buying from the one who offers the lowest price.

6. Just give him your address and say "Surprise me". Then hang up.

7. Answer his questions with other questions.

8. Spell the ingredients.

9. Stutter every time you say something with the letter "P"

10. Ask him if they have pizza.

11. Say "Hello" and act as if he called you.

12. Make your order being very decided and secure, then when he asks you if you would like a drink with the pizza, act as if you were confused.

13. Change your accent every 5 seconds.

14. Ask for 56 pepperoni slices followed by an equation.

15. If he repeats the order to make sure, say "Ok, it’s 17.90, please proceed to the next window to pick up your order".

16. Explain him that you want to rent a Pizza.

17. Ask if you can keep the box. When he answers yes, make a huge sigh of relief.

18. Ask him if they exploit child labor.

19. Tell him to make sure that your pizza is dead.

20. Imitate the voice of the guy taking the order.

21. Eliminate the verbs of everything you say.

22. Tell him that there’s a surprise party at yours and that you would appreciate if the delivery boy could hide behind the couch until the celebrated one comes in to surprise him/her.

23. Ask if you could see the menu

24. Warn them that they have no idea of what they are dealing with by supplying this order.

25. Ask him which ingredient is better for a meal with a specific type of wine.

26. Burp and then tell your dog that he should be ashamed.

27. Ask only for one slice.

28. Psychoanalyze the guy taking the order.

29. Complain about the service. Call again two hours later saying that you were drunk and that you are sorry about what you said.

30. Tell the guy taking the order to tell the one in charge to tell the supervisor that he’s fired.

31. Randomly start swearing to someone who is apparently next to you.

32. Stop speaking every 10 seconds and start playing an instrument.

33. Tell a secret code to the guy taking the order and tell him to memorize it for orders you’ll make in the future.

34. Ask for mushrooms as the first ingredient, then before you hang up, say "no mushrooms please". Then hang up before he can say anything.

35. When he repeats the order, correct him changing an ingredient, then correct him again, and again. The third time ask him if it’s his first day working there.

36. Breath really loudly.

37. Ask him how many whales/dolphins had to die to make that pizza.

38. Avoid using the word "PIZZA" by any means. If the guy taking the order says it, hang up saying "Please, don’t use that word".

39. Make the order during a car chase on TV. When there are gunshots, yell "Aaarghhh"

40. If the guy taking the order doesn’t take any of the previous jokes, ask him if there’s any other who would take them.

PONDER THIS

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops. On my desk, I have a work station…
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! If you can raed this psas it on!

DOOFENSHMIRTZ EVILINCORPORATED
You just sang it in you head, didn't you?

By YoursTrulyJaneDoe

I am that girl. The one who likes book boys more than real ones.I am the girl who still watches cartoons. The one who is always happy no matter what you have to say. The one who wonders what will become of the world with all these stupid people. The one who thinks laughing and living is the same thing. The one who just wants to be somebody that is always remembered and will do anything to make that wish come true. The one that really wants to make a mark, even if it's a small one. The one that sticks to her values, even if you don't agree with them. The one that refuses to believe that this is it, and strives to look for the rest of it. The one that will do anything to live life to the fullest, even when you won't.

By YoursTrulyJaneDoe

I am the girl that goes to school dances, even though I hate the music, just to dance maniacally. I go to games because I have to for band is fun and when they play I get to dance. I am the girl that people can't look through when I say something because I either say it to loud or if they ignore me I punch them. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal.Then again I'm not normal. I am the girl that people call weird anda freak either behind my back or to my face and then I tell them thank you. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to my boyfriend on a cell phone or regular phone because I don't have a cell phone and who uses MySpace anymore. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year because I don't like any of the boys and they're to afraid to ask because intimidate them. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain and gotten strange stares all the while I was doing it. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with various things, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. And most importantly, won't change who I am for anyone, even if you ask nicely.

By YoursTrulyJaneDoe

I am the girl that threatens you even though she wouldn't hurt a fly. The girl that asks all the questions just because she wonders why. The girl who's head is always in the clouds and brimming with ideas. The girl who has everything and everyone will here her. The girl that won't on any challenge. The girl who wants to fear nothing and welcomes the unknown. The one who wants to know everything there is to know about everything. The girl who when she looks happy she truly is. The girl who gives away smiles like they're candy at a parade. The girl laughs even when nothing funny has been said. The one that hardly gets angry but when she does you better run. The girl that goes to the guys section to buy superhero shirts. The girl that doesn't care what you have to say. Unless it's a joke and if it's not funny she'll laugh anyway.

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'
You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.
when everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.
"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
Captain Planet. He's a Hero.
You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
You remember those Where's Waldo books.
You remember eating Warheads.
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.
You remember Ring Pops.
You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.
. . . Furbies
Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!
You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
And Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
Michael Jordan was a king.
YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.
You collected those Beanie Babies.
Mortal Kombat was awesome--the game and the movie
Carebears
Gak was the coolest stuff invented.
Lambchop's song never ended.
The old dollar bills.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
You remember a time before the WB.
You collected all the Troll dolls
You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.
If you even know what an original walkman is.
You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!
You remember Highlight's magazine.
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .
Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .
Before MIKE JONES . . .
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .
Before Spongebob . . .
Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.
When gameboy was a brick.
You did MASH to figure out your future
When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.
Way back.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!
Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . .
or if you smiled at one of these things

Repost this if you agree with it.

WHEN ..
getting HIGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was COOTIES?
'm 0 m' (was your hero)
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMIES were your siblings
and RACE ISSUES were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

You Know You Live In 2012 When...

1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2. Hi.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/FaceBook.

4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

10. You were too busy to notice number five.

11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.

12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.

13. Put this in your profile if you fell for it. You know you did.

Obsessions

YOU KNOW YOUR OBSESSED WITH XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN WHEN..

You call a Xiaolin Showdown over the remote with your younger sibling.

You mutter "Wuya" Under your breath everytime your teacher gives you a bad grade.

Your afraid to eat Jellybeans because your afraid a evil one will hop out at you.

Every time you see a bald guy you yell out "Hey, Omi!".

Every blue ball you see you call the Orb of Tornami.

You jump off a cliff, thinking that you will land on Dojo.

You jump off again, thinking he missed.

You do it a third time, this time holding a pair of fairy wings, and calling them the Wings of Tinabi.

You blame Chucky Choo that the Wings don't work.

You call every Yo-yo your family Yo-yo.

When you talk about Xiaolin showdown your friends and family run.

You have pictures of a character all over your wall.

You have a crush on a character.

You write fanfictions on here about them.

When Xiaolin Showdown comes on, you turn off every little light, turn the volume on high, and sit like a moron.. staring at the tv.

When you see a old bald guy you call him Master Fung.

You call Geckos Dojo.

Everytime you see a cowboy you smile and call him Clay.

Every short Japanese girl you see you chase after, ranting about Raikim.

You grab a penny, jump off the cliff AGAIN, and call out "Mantis Flip Coin!"

You again blame Chucky Choo.

Your put on a chocker you call the Gills of Himachi, and try to breath under water.

You cuss out Chucky Choo when you come back from the hospital.

You named imaginary friends after the characters.

You sit and stare at pictures of Omi and have chats with him.

You plan on naming your first boy child Raimundo.

You tell your best friend to name her girl Kimiko, and then when they are old enough, arrange a marriage.

Call their wedding Raikim.

You have dreams about Raimundo/Jack/Chase Young.

Everytime you bite into a cheese ball, you say "Take that, Omi!"

You call your brother's journal the Ancient Guide to Females.

You call all bald guys Sexists

You repost this in your profile

You know you're obsessed with Young Justice when:

You know every characters background story (even Artemis .)

Every time you get bored with a conversation, you either start eating some form of food or you disappear and give a manical laugh.

When you start talking like Kaldur.

When you start watching the 'black and white' channel with a blank expression like Superboy.

When you can't cook anything/burn cookies or other source of food constantly/on purpose.

When Young Justice was missing without a new episode, you had with-drawls and ran around your house yelling and having an emotional breakdown, begging your sibling to tell you "it isn't so".

When the new episode came out, you had another emotional breakdown and hugged the TV screen, yelling, "OMG, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?"

During YJ's 'vaca', you resorted to watching MAD or other brain killing show.

You Know You’re a Book Addict If:

You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on. (absolutely!)

Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading.

You write fanfictions about the book.

You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else) to read your favorite books.

You accidentally call everyone by the character's names. (not yet, but I probably will soon)

Everything reminds you of the book. (yes)

You quote random lines all the time. (yes)

You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't. (no ,because if I did I would be dead.)

You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class.

You have pictures of your favorite characters on your iPod. (Yes)

You've got a book memorized.

You've read a book more than five times. ( Just Five?)

You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days.

You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like.

You've plotted to murder a character and steal her boyfriend. (YES!)

You hate it when someone calls your favorite character fictional. (yes)

You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional. (yes)

Your idol is a character from a book

I am a book addict and proud of it! If you are as well, then copy and paste this on your profile page.

You Might Be An Author If...

1. Every time you hear a song, you think of a new story or one you've already written.

2. You have the last chapters of a story done before even thinking of the characters names.

3. You often imagine your books becoming movies.

4. Spell check is your best friend.

5. You give even the smallest of characters a huge background.

6. You hesitate before killing of one of your favorite characters.

7. You smile really big when your gonna finally write a character love scene.

8. Every time you read something, you make your own story of the same thing.

9. You'll spend an hour trying to find one word cause you won't dare use a synonym.

10. Not being able to write is like not being able to pee to you... you just can't hold it in for so long.

11. You write so fast, you leave out words in a sentence.

12. You have to tell at least one person your whole story before it's even written.

13. Things that are written bad annoy you and make you want to re-write it better.

14. You laugh at jokes you wrote yourself.

15. You can spell words like 'troublesome' but can't spell 'the' half the time.

16. If your note writing or typing, your fingers are moving constantly.

17. You talk to yourself... constantly.

18. You forget what day it is when your writing.

19. When you have to write some sort of story in class, you get carried away.

20. You would rather die than use words like 'good' or 'nice' and etc.

21. You put off the last chapter of a story simply because you don't want it to end.

22. You start to cry when writing about a death or other depressing event you knew was coming, and you are the one writing it.

23. When on a roll, you will ignore hunger, sleepiness, or the urge to pee until you run out of ideas.

24. If a story, movie, show, etc. finishes without closure, you have a powerful need to write a suitable ending.

25. You like to fidget, tap, or chew on the tip of something when you are trying to come up with a new sentence, paragraph, chapter, or story.

26. You are in love with the Thesaurus.

27. You dream about your stories.

28. You dream of new stories.

29. You often revisit some of your old stories.

30. Someone can call your name twenty times without you hearing if you're writing.

Percy Jackson and the Olympians Fans Vs Normal people.

NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast
PJO FANS:will tell Zeus to make it rain

NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!
PJO FANS: say OH MY GODS!

NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings
PJO FANS:won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or i'll tell on you!
PJO FANS: say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you!

NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid
PJO FANS: know that normal people are stupid

NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!
PJO FANS: when being chased use their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms
PJO FANS: yell at Zeus to calm down

NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation
PJO FANS: would try and find Camp Half Blood

NORMAL PEOPLE: would pinky promise
PJO FANS: would swear on the river styx

NORMAL PEOPLE:dont have this on their profile
PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile!

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show you the pointy hat trick

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination even though they're just as effective

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after my lucky charms"

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month"

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand

11) I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards or Yu-Gi-Oh cards and convince him they're real animals

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work"

14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it

16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive ( The Gryffindors will win!)

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast

18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day"

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways

20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full"

25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell

26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways

28) I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bee's"

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge

30) I will not go to class skyclad

31) I will not use Umbridge's quiz to write, "Told you I was Hard Core"

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm

33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers

34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion

35) I will not call the Weasly twins "bookends"

36) I will not call the Patil twins "bookends"

37) I will not call the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearning an orange anorak

38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine

39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts

40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"

41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck

42) I do not have a Dalek Patronous

43) I will not lick Trevor

44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled "Firewhiskey"

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween

46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously

47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions

48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet

49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God

51) I am not allowed to call Cedric Diggery Edward Cullen by "accident"

52) I am not able to go running around screaming: I saw Harry cutting in the girls bathroom!

53) I'm banned from teaming up against the 1st years with Peeves.

54) Telling people that Cedric turned into a 1918 vampire will get me suspended.

55) I can't called Professer McGonnagal a cougar.

56)I will not have a Pikachu patronus, no matter how awesome it would be.

57)I will not tteach the Veelas the words to 'Oops I did it again'. Not even if they ask nicely.

58)I will not put books with Muggle fairy tales in the history section of the library.

59)I will not ask Ginny what the best way to strangle a rooster is.

60)Albus Dumbledore's real name is not Gandalf.

61)I am not to give the first years vials from potions class that I have labeled 'DRINK ME'.

62)Asking Draco about Pig Farts is forbidden.

63)Dobby is not Yoda in disguise. Even if they do both talk funny.

64)I will not dye the Death Eater's robes red and gold for my own amusement.

65)I will not insist that Professer McGonagall is Catwoman.

66)I will stop insisting that Hogwarts should have 'Bring a Muggle to school day'.

67)'Beaters do it with Wood' is not funny even if everyone but the Weasley twins and Oliver are laughing.

68)Aragog is not a girl therfore I cannot refer to him as 'Charlotte'

Gryffindor
Brave to the point of idiocy.

Slytherin
Our common room is underwater (and that's cool).

Hufflepuff
Are particularly good finders.

Ravenclaw
I can kill you with my brain.

You Know You're a DCU Superhero Fan When...:

1) When you wish for the wisdom of solomon.

2) When you know all the the people in the Bat Clan and they're origins by heart.

3) When you're about to jump over the wall thingy in gym class you scream "na na na na na na BATMAN!!"

4) When you relate something to an episode, movie, or comic issue.

5) When all the girls swoon over a popular boy and you look at him saying "please. he's no Robin." (I want a Robin.)

6) When you wear a shirt stating "Justice League Fan Club" every day.

7) When you sign a secret santa present "From the Question"

8) When you spaz at anyone calling Captain Marvel The Flash or Shazzam.

9) When you're home alone and you practice your evil laugh so you can beat the Joker the next time he shows up on TV.

10) Laugh at those who call you a comic book weirdo and say "on an alternate world you'd be my best friend."

11) look at your teacher and then look at a picture of Slade Wilson aka Deathstroke. then make all the possible coinsidences that could connect him with slade. once you figure out that this guy is way to close to being slade jump to conclusions and figure that Slade took a teacher form to blend in with our world on a plot to world dominaion including making his students lives impossible!

Perseus Jackson.Savior of Olympus.
Electricity. That's what will shock you if you mess with Thalia Grace.
Riptide. Percy's lethal ballpoint pen.
Clarisse. That's who will go after you if you beat her in a battle.
Yellow duffle bags. Helped Percy, Tyson, and Annabeth.
Jason Grace. Thalia's "lost" little brother.
Annabeth Chase. Percy's girlfriend and official architect of Olympus.
Chiron. Trainer of heroes.
Kaleidoscope. What Piper's eyes look like to Jason.
Son of Neptune. The book we can't wait for.
Olympus. Home of the gods.
Nemesis. Ethan's mother. Don't worry, she's not getting her revenge on his death.
Atlas. Zoe's father.
Never back down. The phrase that reminds me of TLO.
Dionysus. The god of wine. (More like the god of Diet Coke.)
Thalia Grace. Hunter of Artemis and daughter of Zeus.
Hephaestus. The father of our favorite fire boy. ;)
Empathy link. What Grover and Percy have. Saved Grover's life a couple of times.
Officers. The immortal skeletons dressed up as officers.
Lupa. The she-wolf we all want to know about.
Morpheus. The gods of dreams. Put NYC asleep during TLO.
Persephone. The kidnapped wife of Hades. Believes every hero is brave and wants to give them a chance.
Illiterates. Many kids believe some of the demigods are illiterates.
Artemis. Goddess of the Hunt. Has hunters, including Thalia
Nothing lasts forever. Even the gods.
Switched. Percy and Jason are switched. Jason at CHB, Percy at Legion Camp.

Pick twelve random characters from your fandom.

1. Wally West/Kid Flash/Flash (YJ)

2. M'gann M'orzz/Miss Martian (YJ)

3. Zatanna Zatara/Zatanna (YJ)

4. Jaime Reyes/Blue Beetle (YJ)

5. Artemis Crock/Artemis/Tigress (YJ)

6. Dinah Lance/Black Canary (YJ)

7. Barry Allen/The Flash (YJ)

8. Dick Grayson/Robin/Nightwing (YJ)

9. Garfield Logan/Beast Boy (YJ)

10. Raquel Ervin/Rocket (YJ)

11. Kaldur'ahm/Aqualad/Black Manta (YJ)

12. Barbara Gordon/Batgirl (YJ)

Have you ever read a six/eleven fic? Do you want to?

Maybe.

Do you think four is hot? How hot?

Semi hot. He's no Robin.

What would happen if twelve got eight pregnant?

Maybe if it was the other way around. Even if I hate the pairing (Dick is MINE!!) it's possible.

Can you recall any fics about nine?

No, I pretty much only read spitfire.

Would two and six make a good couple?

No, just no.

Five/nine or five/ten?

Neither. Artemis is meant for Wally ONLY.

What if seven walked in on two and twelve kissing?

He would find it very odd and just turn around and walk out of the room.

Is there such a thing as one/eight fluff?

You have no IDEA!!!

Suggest a title for a seven/twelve hurt/comfort fic.

Fatherly Flash... I'm not good at titles.

What kind of plot would you use if you wanted four to deflower one?

Let's not go there.

Do any of your friends read three het?

Maybe, I'm not sure if she's a Zatanna Fan.

Do any of your friends write eleven?

Probably not, she's not a big Aqualad Fan.

Would any of your friends write two/four/five?

Nope, isn't one for love triangle and such.

What might ten scream at a moment of great passion?

Rocket would probably say something like "I don't give a damn what you have to say." I don't really know.

If you wrote a one/six/twelve fic what would the warning be?

Warning: If you don't think about, it could happen.

What might be a good pick-up line for ten to use on two?

None if she enjoys living. Superboy or Lagoon Boy wouldn't appreciate it.

When was the last time you read a fic about five?

A minute ago...

What is six's super-secret annoyance?

Stupid men.

Would eleven shag nine? Drunk or sober?

NO!!! You sick freaks.

If three and seven got together, who tops?

Nope don't think the Flash would ever leave Iris.

(1) and (9) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3). What title would you give this fic?

Wally and Garfield are in a happy relationship until Garfield runs off with Jamie??????? Wally, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Kal and a brief unhappy affair with Babs, then follows the wise advice of Arty, and finds true love with Zatanna. Lots to Do.

How would you feel if seven/eight was cannon?

Very disturb. Emphasis on the DIS.

4 and 8 had a thumb wrestling match. Of the two, which would arise victorious?

Without the scarab, Nightwing would win.

There is an air guitar contest. Which character would dominate with over-the-top moves and relentless energy?

Garfield or young Wally.

All of the characters are arrested during a bank heist. Which would talk first?

Garfield or young Wally.

All of the characters are trying to give something up. Which character would successfully go cold turkey?

Artemis. Just the way she is.

What if the characters were Hostess snack cakes? o.O Which would be a Twinkie?

Wally. NO question.

What if the characters were mythical creatures? Which would be Pegasus, the winged horse?

Young M'gann.

What if the characters were cavemen? Which would have invented the wheel?

Nightwing. Most definitely.

What if they were pairs of slippers? Which would be a pair of fuzzy slippers?

Wally because I imagine his hair is soft and he's warm because of his metabolism.

What if they were bodies of water? Which would be the Fountain of Youth?

Gar. Duh, he's youngest and adorable.

The characters are all on a camping trip together. Which would most crave the conveniences of home?

Wally, I think... Not sure why though.

What if the characters were pieces of sporting equipment? Which would be a bowling ball?

Kal.

What if the characters were games? Which would be a Barrel of Monkeys?

Garfield... You know he just reminds me of a monkey.

What if they were all pairs of shoes? Which would be flip-flops?

Kaldur. He's practical.

It is a blustery, snowy day. Which character would most likely brush the snow off the boss's car, hoping to win brownie points?

Wally, especially if his boss was a woman.

All of the characters are contestants on a reality TV singing show. Which would make it the furthest in the competition?

Nightwing.

All of the characters are in girl scouts . Which would earn the "Write All About It" badge first?

M'gann she probably write everything that happens down.

All of the characters go camping together and suddenly see a UFO landing. Which character(s) would board the craft?

Everyone. Someone stays on lookout though.

What if they were precious metals? Which would be platinum?

Nightwing.

Each of the characters have purchased a brand new computer. Which would call everyone else needing an explanation on how to use it?

Garfield maybe sense he's young.

You're out on a night out with 8 when you're savagely and drunkenly attacked by 2. What does 8 do?

Yaaaaay! I'm out with Robin. My life is complete. M'gann could kill me and wouldn't care. Robin would probably trow sleeping gas at her in or something, not like I care I'm out with ROBIN. Hyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

What would happen if 9 got 5 pregnant?

Wally would be so pissed. That would be really weird and be considered rape.

7 and 12 are making out when 4 walks in. What's 4's reaction?

Falsh and Batgirl hmmmm. Blue Beetle gap and walk out.

10 falls in love with 3. 1 is jealous, what happens?

Rocket falls in love with Zatanna. Wally is jealous. Don't really know what would happen.

4 pulls up beside you, and offers you a lift. Will you take it?

Yes.

Why is 6 afraid of 7?

I don't think she is.

10 is getting ready to marry 5, when 9 runs in to stop the ceremony. What is 9's reason?

Rocket and Artemis are getting married. Gar runs in to stop it because he's a WallArt shipper. Duh.

Give a title of a romance movie about 3 and 12.

The bird's competition.

Important Things I Learned From Rick Riordan

-Even cat goddesses like growling at birds.
-The five elements are earth, air, fire, water, and cheese.
-Children of rival gods can fall in love.
-No one really knows why the Egyptians wrote without vowels.
-Nemean lions can be defeated with freeze dried ice cream.
-Eating fruit bats is bad for your health.
-Contrary to popular belief, hellhounds can be domesticated.
-The Set animal does not appreciate being named Leroy.
-Yes, that twelve year old wearing a silver jacket is a goddess.
-Jackal headed gods can be very attractive.
-Math teachers really are evil.
-Set's secret name is Evil Day. (Use this to your advantage...)
-It's not easy to insult a daughter of Athena.
-Elvis was a magician. No, really.
-Do not trust the bald man who wants to sell you a water bed.
-Boomerangs can cast spells.
-It's possible to gamble moonlight.
-Even the ferryman of the dead wants a pay raise.
-Rainbows have power.
-If you hear a voice in your head, you're not crazy - you just have an uber-powerful god living inside you.
-Demons will give you free samples if you ask nicely.

These are some of my favorite quotes

"Thirty years from now, it won't matter what shoes you wore, how your hair looked, or the jeans you bought. What will matter is what you learned and how you used it."

"Nobody is worth your tears, and the one who is won't make you cry."

"If god is the DJ, life is a dance floor, love is the rhythm, and you are the MUSIC."

"Dear math, I don't want to solve your problems, I have my own to solve."

"Everything good in life is either illegal, fattening, or bad."

"That which does not kill us, only makes us stronger.Unless it kills you then it makes you dead."- Veri Silva

"Be the change you wish to see in the world."

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift. That's why we call it the present..."

"Don't tell me sky is the limit, when there are footprints on the moon."

"It's a beautiful day... now watch some idiot screw it up."

"Whoever said nothing was impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door or stapling jello to a tree."- Veri Silva

"Life is about falling- living is about getting back up."

"Hug an emo. They'll love you for it."

"A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it."

"I survived Y2K, Bird flu, Swine flu, and mad cow disease. 2012, BRING IT ON!"

"Music expresses that which cannot be put into words. Dancing expresses everything else."-Veri Silva

"I'm too positive to be doubtful. Too optimistic to me fearful. And too determined to be defeated."

"I have the cape, I make the whoosh noises!"

"This is Bob. Bob likes you. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob."

"Here is all you need to know about men and women. Men are dumb and women are crazy. And the reason women are crazy is because men are dumb."

"I'm a Fermata! Hold me!"

"Redefine the parameters and declare success."

-about The Lost Hero- "...and my boys looked at eachother and started laughing, and I said, 'what?' They said, 'no, Dad, you need to call it, 'Happy the Dragon's Magical Adventure!'"-Rick Riordan

"I prefer dreams over reality."-Adam Young (aka Owl City)

"Life is too important to be taken seriously"

"Anything girls do, they have to do two times better than men to be thought half as good. Good thing it isn't hard."

"Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history."

"He who laughs last didn't get it."

"When life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice, and let life wonder how the heck you did that!"

"When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!"

"Don't follow in my footsteps. I run into walls."

''If God gives you Lemons find a better God."

"If life gives you lemons find a child with a paper cut."

" If Life really did give you Lemons would they be literal ones or Fanfiction ones."- Veri Silva

"God is watching us the least we could do is be entertaining."

"Knowledge is knowing that a Tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad."

"And that's all you really need - someone who sees the psycho that you are, and likes you anyway!" - Icicle Jr., Young Justice cartoon

"I reject your reality and substitute my own!" -Adam Savage

"There are a great many good books in this world without pictures." - Alice's older sister, Alice in Wonderland, 1951 film

"Razors pain you // Rivers are damp // Acids stain you // And drugs cause cramp // Guns aren't lawful // Nooses give // Gas smells awful // You might as well live." - Dorothy Parker, Resume

"There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about." - Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

"Conscience and cowardice are really the same things ... Conscience is the trade-name of the firm. That is all."

"Sometimes I'm so clever even I don't understand a word I'm saying." Oscar Wilde

"I hope you're pleased with yourselves. We could all have been killed - or worse, expelled." - Hermione Granger

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on Earth should that mean that it is not real?" - Dumbledore

"Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure." Rowena Ravenclaw

"My improbable plan worked!" - Finn, Adventure Time

"Well, get traught or get dead!" - Robin, Young Justice

"Sweet, maybe. Passionate, I suppose . . . But don't ever mistake that for nice." - The Tenth Doctor, Doctor Who

"I'm a psychopath. I'm not rude." - Doctor Who

"Freeze was under-whelmed! You're over-whelmed! Why isn't anyone ever just whelmed?" -Robin, Young Justice

"If 'like' is the opposite of 'dislike'... is 'aster' the opposite of 'disaster'... obviously, you're not feeling the aster." -Robin, Young Justice

"Sorry you're 'disturbed'. Maybe you'll be more turbed once we kick your can!" -Robin, Young Justice

"Ooh! Oooh! He hit on teacher and got served?"-Robin, Young Justice

"I can hear you glaring"-Aqualad, Young Justice

"Parents spend the first half of your life teaching you to walk and talk, and the other half telling you to sit down and shut up."

"Flying is very simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss."

"You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you are all the same."

"It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile, and only 4 to reach out and slap someone!"

"How come parents always say, "Don't take candy from strangers," But on Halloween, it is encouraged? Am I the only sane person? Hello?"

"You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh harder."

Shawn: I agree. NOT. Said the liar.
Random Guy: I'm not sure those two go together. 'Said the liar' cancels 'Not' out.
Shawn: SO DOES YOUR FACE.-Shawn from 'Psych'

"I don't respond well to intimidation, it makes me feel icky." Mort Rainey from 'Secret Window'- Shawn, Psych

"If you are what you eat does that mean cannibals are the true humans."

"Dancers are the athletes of GOD." -Albert Einstein

"Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's looking."

"When you dance the purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor, It's to enjoy each step along the way." -Wayne Dyer

"Keep calm and... OMG! Is. That. Peeta Mellark?!"

"Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders." -Cedric, A Very Potter Musical

"Rhinos are just fat unicorns. If we'd give them the time and attention they deserve, as well as a diet they'd reveal their majestic ways."

"Are you crying?" "No, my eyes are peeing."

"You're weird... I like you."

"Sanity is overrated. Tried it once, didn't get it."-Ed Westwick, Chalet Girl

"Oh angst, the rich people's alternative to real problems."- Felicity Jones, Chalet Girl

"I watch you while you sleep." "That's creepy man!" "I can't help it, I take pictures." "So when do you sleep? Justice never sleeps!"-Finn and Jake, Adventure Time

"I got confused by some old movie I saw the other day about this ninja girl who's ninja dad ordered her to kill her ninja boyfriend 'cus he was from a rival ninja clan." -Artemis, Young Justice

Kid Flash: "So, I'm ninja boyfriend, huh?"
Artemis: "Hey. Amnesia, remember? Completely forgot how *truly* annoying you are."
Kid Flash: "Oh and you're the goddess of congeniality."
Robin: [Entering] "Yeesh. Get a room!"- Young Justice

"I used up all my sick days, so I called in dead"

"Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to"

"There are a lot of problems with real life. For one, there's no background music"

"Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid"

"Before you judge a person, walk a mile in his shoes. After that it doesn't matter. You're a mile away from him and you have his shoes"

"They say 'guns don't kill people, people kill people.' Well, I think the guns help. If you just stood there yelling 'BANG' I don't think you'd kill to many people."

"So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil?"

"Don't make me mad... I'm known to bite at random."

"A newscaster is the person that says 'Good Evening' and then tells you why it's not"

"Step one: Tell the truth! Step Two: Run!"

"I talk to myself because my answers are the only ones I accept."

"When life gives you lemons, throw them back, because really? Who likes lemons."

"Bacon is God's currency"-Dave Grole

"I want a guillotine, I shall use it to cut my fruit"-Darrin

M:"I put chocolate in my brownies," T:"I put love in mine," M:"Chocolate is the same thing as love."-Mariah, Tracy

M:"I Chocolate you Krystal." K:"Chocolate is a verb?"-Mariah, Krystal

"I've said it once before, and I'll say it again. You are one seriously crazed up fruit loop."-Danny Phantom, Danny Phantom

"Quit touching yourself!"-Artemis, Young Justice

Artemis: "[Noticing her costume] WHO PUT ME IN THIS?"
Kid Flash: "Wow. I am not touching that with a 10-foot - uh, so you know how to us that bow?"
Artemis: "Yeah, my dad taught me... DAD! He must've done this. Another of his stupid tests."
Kid Flash: "What kind of test?"
Artemis: "He probably wants me to kill you."-Young Justice

Artemis:"Did you just hear a girl talking in your head?"
Kid Flash: "Girls are always on my mind, but they're not usually talking."-Young Justice

"I am not your mother!"-Shawn's Darth Vader imitation, Psych

"Evil beware, we have waffles." -Raven, Teen Titans

"Hello,Megan!"-Miss Martian, Young Justice

"Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the titanic..."

"Who ever said that words never hurt obviously has never got hit by a dictionary."

"Who ever says 'as easy as taking candy from a baby' has never tried to."

"A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws."

"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."

"God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made woman." - Adela Rodgers St. Johns

"Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that."

"Nope, can't go to Hell. Satan still has that restraining order against me..."

"Boys in books are just...Better!"

"It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces."

"You know you're a geek when procrastination doesn't affect your grades."

"Stupidity killed the cat. Curiousity was framed."

"Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them."

"Yeah, I'm a loser. But the coolest loser you'll ever meet."

"Save the Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate."

"You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me."

"When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then."

"Life isnt passing me by; it's trying to run me over."

"Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide."

"I live in my own little world. But it's okay, they know me there."

"The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide."

"Your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend."

"If electricity comes from electrons, where do you think morality comes from?"

"Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking
leeches?"

"Everything in this room is eatable, even I'm eatable. But that is called 'cannibalism' my dear children, and it is in
fact frowned upon in most societies."-Willy Wonka

" I used to be normal... until I met those freaks I call my friends."

"I got you a present; it's a CD. I hope you haven't got it, because I don't have a receipt... and I didn't exactly buy it..."

"The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!"

"When in doubt, make up words!"

"Home is not where you live, but where they understand you."

"If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you!"

"If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty."

"All work and no play means you will die in seven days... dun dun duuun."

"I run with scissors; it makes me feel dangerous."

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today; its already tomorrow in Australia."

"Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid."

"You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not cold then I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thank You for
embracing it!"

"One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject."

"Give a person a fish and feed them for a day, teach them how to use the internet and they won't bother you for
weeks!"

"The statistics of insanty is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends, if they're
okay, then it's you."

"When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide."

"A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work."

"There is no "I" in team but there is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of
TEAM..."

"Music is like candy: You throw away the (w)rappers."

"Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe."

"What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question... I wonder..."

"Do not take life too seriously; no one gets out alive."

"If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk."

"Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?"

"I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly."

"Don't hit kids. No, seriously, they have guns now."

"WARNING: Children left unattended will be sold to the circus."

"If your heart was really broken you'd be dead, so shut up."

"Yes, I do use my hairbrush as a microphone and dance around in my underwear. Thank you very much."

"I don't have a dog... I eat my own homework. I'm not random, I just have many tho- OOH, LOOK! A SQUIRREL!"

"Please: Don't throw your cigarette butt's on the floor, the cockroaches are getting cancer."

"There are three kinds of people: Those who can count, and those who can't."

"Welcome to the internet, pants optional."

"Warning: Trespassers will be shot, Survivors will be shot again."

"If I throw a stick, will you go away?"

"When someone tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football."

"Once I had a handle on life; then it broke"

"Words can't hurt you unless the person saying them writes them on an anvil and drops it on your head."

"Books are always better than real, live boyfriends any day of the week. They don't talk back and they're always
there for you. You can have as many of them as you want and they won't complain."

"God created man before woman because every masterpiece needs a rough draft."

"Well behaved women rarely make history."

"Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see."

"You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."-Dr. Seuss

"True love stories never have endings."

"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."

"A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway."

"Friendship doubles joy and halves grief."

"And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the
words."

"There is nothing worth the wear of winning, but laughter and the love of friends."

"Lots of your friends want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you
when the limo breaks down."

"True friends are very difficult to find, hard to leave, and impossible to forget."

"Hold a true friend with both your hands."

"A true friend is one who thinks you are a good egg even if you are half cracked."

"As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction."

"You never miss the water till the well has run dry."

"The longest road out is the shortest road home."

"Good laugh and long sleep are the best cures in a doctor's book."

"Today is the yesterday you worried about tomorrow."

"Youth is happy because it has the capacity to see Beauty.
Anyone who keeps the ability to see Beauty never grows old."

"Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love."

"Always laugh when you can. It is cheaper than medicine…"

"The two most common elements in the world are hydrogen and stupidity."

"Never live life unnoticed."

"In order to be irreplaceable, you must always be different."

"Cute is when a person’s personality shines through their looks. Like in the way they walk, every time you see them
you just want to run up and hug them."

"Never look back unless youre planning to go that way."

"Life is not the amount of breaths you take, it’s the moments that take your breath away…"

"Love is just something you can’t explain, like the look of a rose, the smell of rain, or the feeling of forever."

"A smile is the beginning of peace."

"Give your smile to everyone but give your heart to only one."

"A smile happens in a flash but its memory can last for a lifetime."

"Do you love me because I’m beautiful or am I beautiful because you love me."

"May those who love us, love us. And for those who don't love us, May God turn their hearts. And if he can not turn
their hearts, May he turn their ankles, So we may know them by their limping. May you live as long as you want, and
never want as long as you live."

"There are good ships, and there are wood ships, the ships that sail the sea. But the best ships are friendships,
and may they always be."

"May the sons of your daughters smile up in your face."

"May your home always be too small to hold all your friends."

"Here's to you and yours And to mine and ours. And if mine and ours Ever come across to you and yours,
I hope you and yours will do As much for mine and ours As mine and ours have done For you and yours!"

"A toast to your coffin. May it be made of 100 year old oak. And may we plant the tree together, tomorrow."

"May the dust of your carriage blind the eyes of your foe."

"May you never forget what is worth remembering, Or remember what is best forgotten."

"May you get all your wishes but one, So you always have something to strive for."

"Here's to me, and here's to you, And here's to love and laughter I'll be true as long as you, And not one
moment after."

"Look in my eyes you will find me. Look in my heart you will find you."

"You can't buy love, but you can pay for it."

"If all else fails, kick him in the stones and run like hell." -Stephen Hyde

“Life sucks, and then you die. Yeah, I should be so lucky.” -Jacob Black

"You could lock Gazzy up in a room with nothing but a bowl full of Jell-o and his shoelaces and he would still find some way to blow something up." -Maximum Ride

"I only know how to do things three ways: the right way, the wrong way, and my way... which is the wrong way only faster."

"To catch me you got to be fast, to find me you got to be smart, but to be me? Damn you must be kidding..."

“Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!”

"STUPID = Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand."

"Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later."

"I do not suffer from insanity! I enjoy every minute of it!"

"I haven't lost my mind! I sold it on eBay."

"I have plenty of common sense! I just chose to ignore it."

"Yeah, I'm a freak. BUT I'M THE COOLEST FREAK YOU'LL EVER MEET!!"

"If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?"

"Love your enemies. And that's only one way to annoy them!"

"At what age do cowboys become cowmen?"

"Tell the truth and RUN FOR IT."

"If everything is going well in my mind then you have overlooked something."

"Education is important, but school is another matter."

"The one who smiles when all goes wrong has thought of someone to blame."

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed."

"Be insane. Well behaved girls are no fun to read about."

"If you can't BEAT them, JOIN them.
If you can't JOIN them, BRIBE them. If you can't BRIBE them, BLACKMAIL them.
If you can't BLACKMAIL them, KILL them.
If you can't KILL them, you're SCREWED."

"I had a friend once. Then his rope broke and he ran for it."

"I took the less traveled by road... NOW WHERE THE HECK AM I?!"

"Before embarking on revenge, dig 2 graves. That way if someone gets in the way, you can dispose of each body quickly."

"Normality will be restored as soon as we figure out what it is."

"You always get whats coming to you; unless it gets lost in the mail."

"Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is."

"Beware the letter 'G'. It is the end of everything."

"Forecast for tonight: darkness."

"If you try to fail and succeed, which one did you do?"

"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."

"There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line."

"I'm not random I just have many thoughts."

"NERD: an individual persecuted for his/her superior skill or intellect most often by people who fear and envy her."

"I SWEAR THERE'S A LOT OF VEGETABLES OUT THERE THAT CROP UP FOR AIR..."

"People make history with actions. Writers make history with words, our history lasts longer. What now!!"

"If you can't convince them, confuse them."

"OH WAIT…WHAT HATERS? I CAN’T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF THE FRIDGE DOOR OPENING IN ARTEMIS AND WALLY’S APARTMENT." - sar-cat

"IN CASE OF EMERGENCIES: run like hell!"

"I didn't hit you, I simply high-fived your face..."

"The road to success is always under construction."

"I'm not deaf, I'm just ignoring you!

"Procrastinator UNITE...tomorrow."

"WARNING: do not set self on fire."

"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car."

"DRINK COFFEE! Do Dumb Things Faster with More Energy!"

"If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button!."

"Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery."

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."

"I am a bomb technician - If you see me running try to keep up."

"PRIVATE PROPERTY: If you can read this, you are within range."

"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils."

"I have the cupcake I MAKE THE RULES!"

"I got attacked by a giant screaming rainbow... but it turns out it was just technical difficulties."

"Never got to bed angry. Stay awake and plot your revenge."

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."

"There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird."

"When life give you lemons, throw them back at life and steal the oranges you asked for."

"It doesn’t matter what it is, it’s automatically cool if it glows in the dark!"

"Some people were dropped as a baby…. You were clearly thrown at a wall."

"According to parents, we're too young for love, too old for fun, too smart to play dumb and too immature for certian movies. It's no wonder teens are so rebellious! There's nothing else to do."

"When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's actually a meteor hurtling toward Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor."

"...Religion is a mere castle in the air."-d'Holbach

"...creepy is the new chivalry..."-Dana Sokolowski

"Lasers! He has lasers!"-Nightwing

"No juice for you!"-Ben Tennyson

"Me and a giant robot in Tokyo wave to you hello."-Patrick Ness

"Will the machowave eat me?"-Kasta Evanson

"Please don't send me to Hell. I'm too cute to go to Hell."-Kasta Evanson

"I really need some more kick from my sidekick!"-Rex Salazar

"M'gann, I would not be in a pear tree, I would be perched on top of a gargoyle."-Robin, YJTV

"I feel naked and not in a fun way."-Artemis, Young Justice

"It's the heroin to my Roy Harper!"-Moi

"Diamonds are a girl’s best friend...because they're shaper then knives."

"ADOST: Attention Deficit-Ohh Shiny Thing"

"Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live."

"Women are angels. When someone breaks our wings, we continue flying...on broomsticks."

"Relax. Nothing is okay."

"Just say no to drugs. Because if your drugs are talking to you, you've probably had too many."

"Never do anything you don't want to explain to the paramedics.

"You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor."

"Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left."

"If you can stay calm when everything around you is complete chaos, you probably haven't fully understood the situation."

"Kid, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers."

"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

"Stop rushing me! I'm makeing mistakes as fast as I can.

"There's madness in my method.

"It's impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious

"Some say the glass is half full, some say the glass is half empty. I say “Are you gonna drink that?"

"Whoever said "words don't hurt" have obviously never had a hard-backed encyclopedia hurled at their head.

"All people have the right to stupidity but some abuse the privilege.

"When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice into your enemies eyes!"

"When life gives you lemons, eat an apple."

"When life gives you lemons squirt them in life's eyes, then run far, far away."

"Earth is full. Go home."

"Never argue with an idiot. They'll only drag you down to their level and beat you with experience."

"Being weird is like being normal, only better."

"I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me."

"I get plenty of exercise; jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines."

"Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright."

"PMS - Possible Murder Suspect"

"As I lay in bed looking at the twinkling stars above me, I think, 'Where the hell is my ceiling?'"

"I'm only mean to people who tell me to be nice!"

"Curiosity killed whoever got in my way."

"Smile. It scares people."

"An overly-positive attitude may not be enough to solve a problem, but it sure ticks people off enough for it to be worth it!"

"There are easier things to do in life than finding a good man. Nailing Jelly to a tree, for instance."

"A wise man once said, "I don't know, go ask a woman."

"I'm not so good with advice. May I offer a sarcastic comment?"

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, 'oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!'"

"When life gives you lemons, be sure to send a hand written thank you note for the lemons, as email thank you notes can appear to be less sincere."

"You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?"

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed."

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor's cute, screw the fruit."

"I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert."

"Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking."

"Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else."

"The cops never find it as funny as you do."

"Reality is for people who lack imagination."

"If aliens are looking for intelligent life? WHY THE HECK ARE YOU SCARED?!"

"The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of a fast approaching train."

"Taste the rainbow - Eat CRAYONS!"

"If it wasn't for physics and law enforcement I'd be unstoppable."

"Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'"

"People say I've lost my sanity, but I can't lose what I never had."

"The voices in my head may not be real but they still have pretty good ideas..."

"I definitely have strong feelings for you. I just haven't decided whether they're positive or negative yet." Annabeth Chase from Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief (movie)

"I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt and guess what's inside it!"Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Carribean

"When life gives you lemons suck out all of the vitamin C and yell 'EAT THAT, LIFE!'"

"When life gives you lemons ask for salt and tequila!"

"When life gives you lemons, collect them one day life will stop and u would have the most lemons ever."

"When life hands you lemons make lemonade and find someone else who life handed vodka to, and have a party."

"When life gives you lemons, ask for the receipt."

"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Unless you don't have any sugar... then you just eat the lemons... but don't eat the rinds. it'll give you an upset stomach... unfortunately we all drip lemon juice into our cuts while eating them... so from now on... USE A NAPKIN!"

"He's my brother!"
"He killed 80 people in two days."
"He's adopted." Thor and Black Widow from Marvel Advengers

"ƒĘěĹĬŋĠ ŧĤě ĄŞŤĖŖ"-Robin, Young Justice

"Nine out of the ten voices in my head agree that I'm insane. The tenth is off chasing cars."

"The voices in my head don’t like you."

"Love bites and so do I."

"If you think I'm crazy you should meet my mother."

"I'm right 97% of the time, who cares about the other 4%."

"This is the part where I nod and act like I'm listening."

"Eat right, exercise, die anyway."

"It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn."

"Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck."

"Love your enemies. It gets them really confused."

"Why in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?"

"Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die."

"When your mom leaves you in the car alone for a few minutes, everyone outside immediatly become rapist."

"Don't waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window or break down a door."

"I used to have a life but, that was before computers."-Veri Silva

"Don't look for inspiration. Start working and inspiration will come to you."

"Take risks, if you win you will be happy; if you lose you will be wise."

"There are 3 kinds of people, those who make it happen, those who watch it happen and those who don't know what the heck is happening."

"Curiosity killed the cat. Good thing I'm not a cat or I would be screwed."-Veri Silva

"You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard."

"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and dark side, and holds the universe together."

"Why are wrong numbers never busy?"

"If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?"

"Doesn't 'expecting the unexpecting' make the unexpected expected?"

"Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?"

"STRESS: A condition brought on by over-riding the bodies desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it."

"Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change."

"It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you."

"Never doubt the power of an extremely pissed off woman"

"Life is like a pack of gum . . . I've yet to figure out why."

"If your name is Mr.Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?"

"To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world."

"One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions."

"It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it?"

Person #1: "Happiness is just around the corner!"
Person #2: "Too bad the world is round!"

"Growing old is mandatory . . . growing up is optional . . ."

"We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But we teenage girls are good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves."

"Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young."

"Brunettes make better psychos ;)"

"WARNING: Jumping into toxic waste does not give you super powers"

"BAD spellers of the world 'UNTIE!"

"I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours."

"Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but then its get boring, so i go back to being me."

"When nothing goes right... go left."

"I'm not random, you just can't think as fast as me."

"You cant spell 'BEAUTIFUL' without 'BE U'"

"OOOH.. DRAMA! Let's get popcorn!"

"Do NOT interrupt me when I am talking to myself."

"My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems..."

"I do whatever the voices in my head tell me to do."

"Do it today! It might be illegal tomorrow!"

"You! Off my planet!"

"Allow me to introduce my selves."

"I stopped fighting my inner demons quite some time ago. We're on the same side now."

"I do not have an attitude problem! I have an attitude, but I just can't find a problem with it."

"I don't need your attitude, I have my own."

"I'm not mean, you're just a sissy."

"You're a great friend. But if zombies are chasing us, I'm tripping you."

"Be the type of woman, that when your feet land on the floor when you get out of bed in the morning, the devil thinks: 'Oh, crap! She's up!'"

"Note to self: It is illegal to stab people for being stupid."

Anyone: "Go to hell!
You: "I did. But Hell was full, so I came back."

"And to think you are the result of millions of years of evolution."

"There's nothing that can't be fixed with duct tape, chocolate, or by running it over."

"Don't upset me, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies."

"Everyday I think people can't get any dumber. Everyday I'm proven horribly wrong."

"I know who I am...your approval really isn't needed."

"Normal people worry me."

"Sarcasm is just one more service we offer."

"A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door."

"I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one."

"Not all men are annoying. . . . Some are dead."

"Chaos, panic, & disorder -- my work here is done."

"Ambivalent? Well, yes and no."

"I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive."

"Make like a guillotine and head off."

"I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have the weapons of their choice. However, I also believe that only I should have ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of them with anything more dangerous than string."

"I need six months holiday… twice a year."

"There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is full."

"Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your pet die and your mom saying you can still keep it."

"If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'? Congress? Thought so."

"I didn’t escape from the mental ward! Those sirens are a complete coincidence!"

"Drive like you stole it!"

"If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?"

"If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?"

"All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand."

"Best friends know how stupid you are and still choose to be with you in public."

"What you call stupidity, I call selective understanding."

"I'm an optimistic pessimist."

"I am NOT saying your stupid...I'm just implying it."

"Don't try to out-weird me-- I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal."

"You don't like me, well it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter."

"You're a special kind of stupid aren't you?"

"Stupid is when you spend 18 hours trying to drown a fish."

"You're so stupid you threw a rock at the ground and missed."

"I didn't mean to hurt your feelings...I was aiming for your face."

"You say 'crazy' like it's a bad thing."

"I'm not afraid of death. What's it going to do, kill me?"

"You should be a pessimist- you're either right or pleasantly surprised."

"I don't exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I'd drink it."

"Sanity, is like parachutes. Just because you've lost yours doesn't mean you can barrow mine. Also, I kinda lost mine too."

"When.I.Read.Stuff.Like.This.The.Voice.In.My.Head.Takes.Pauses."

"I wish life was like a musical. and in the middle of math, i could just jump out of my seat, throw up my papers and start singing. And then the whole math class would pull this dance routine out of their butt, and we would all know the song we were spontainiously making up... then sit down like nothing happened."

"No matter how old you are, no matter how much of a ganster you think you are, if a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it."

"Learn the rules so you know how to properly break them."

"Dear McDonald's Cashier, Stop looking at me like that. Last time I checked, there were no age limits for Happy Meals. Sincerely, Don't Forget The Toy."

"If you're gonna embarrass yourself, do it right!"

"Get the facts first, you can distort them later."

"Is it just me or does everything seem funnier when you’re suppose to be quiet?"

"Don't steal. The government hates the competition."

"If at first you don't succeed, change the rules."

"Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat."

"Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make ye mad."

"All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative."

"Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts."

"If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over."

"When I said 'I'd hit that.' I meant with my car."

"Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate."

"I don't care what other people think of me. As long as I have my books and my friends."

"He is no fool if he should choose to give the things he cannot keep to buy what he can never lose." -Jim Elliot

"Authors who don't read are like chefs who don't eat."

"All get what they want; they do not always like it." --Aslan

"The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed." -C. S. Lewis

"Books are gateways, portals, through which the imagination can slip through into another time, another place, or even another world.

Some books were meant to be tasted, others devoured...but only a few to be chewed and digested thoroughly." -Inkheart

"For writers who have low self esteem- read your story, read this one, and be happy you have an IQ. Good day." -Anonymous reviewer for 'My Immortal REPOST'.

"And, because the replacement author also likes to screw around with canon, Draco and Hermione fled the scene and got married." -Hacker of Tara's account, Fake Chapter 40, My Immortal

"For a change, lady luck seemed to be smiling on me. Then again, maybe the fickle wench was just lulling me into a false sense of security while she reached for a rock." -Timothy Zahn

"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."-Edgar Allan Poe

" Writing- the profession in which you stare at a computer screen, stare out the window, type a few words, then curse repeatedly."Drew Goodman

"Writing is like sex. First you do it for love, then you do it for your friends, and then you do it for money."-Virginia Woolf

"Never memorize something that you can look up."-Albert Einstein

Contrariwise, if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic."-Lewis Carroll

"There is no real ending. It’s just the place where you stop the story."-Frank Herbert

"I didn't lie! I just created fiction with my mouth! "-Homer

Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand."-Mark Twain

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."-Mark Twain

Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever."-Mark Twain

"It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense."-Mark Twain

"As far as I'm concerned, the entire reason for becoming a writer is not having to get up in the morning."-Neil Gaiman

"Things need not have happened to be true. Tales and adventures are the shadow truths that will endure when mere facts are dust and ashes and forgotten."-Neil Gaiman

"You get ideas from daydreaming. You get ideas from being bored. You get ideas all the time. The only difference between writers and other people is we notice when we're doing it."-Neil Gaiman

"You ask me again if I look upon writing as an escape from reality: in no sense of the word does it seem to me to be escape from reality; I should rather say that it is an attempt to approach and penetrate reality."-Thomas Wolfe

"It begins with a character, usually, and once he stands up on his feet and begins to move, all I can do is trot along behind him with a paper and pencil trying to keep up long enough to put down what he says and does."-William Faulkner

"You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children."-Madeleine L'Engle

"I am simply of the opinion that you cannot be taught to write. You have to spend a lifetime in love with words."-Craig Claiborne

"The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn't require any."-Russel Baker

"I would rather be attacked than unnoticed. For the worst thing you can do to an author is to be silent as to his works."-Samuel Johnson

"You must write every single day of your life... You must lurk in libraries and climb the stacks like ladders to sniff books like perfumes and wear books like hats upon your crazy heads... may you be in love every day for the next 20,000 days. And out of that love, remake a world."-Ray Bradbury

"Have I lied to you? I mean, in this room?" -GLaDOS, Portal

"There was a piece of pie in the freezer with a sticky note attached that said 'Do not eat'. There is now an empty plate in the freezer with a note that says 'Don't tell me what to do'." -Brooklyn

"You seem distraught." "M'gann's dying, I'm down to my last arrow, and we have no powers. OF COURSE I'M DISTRAUGHT!" -Robin and Artemis, Young Justice

"PASTAAAA" -N. Italy, Axis Powers Hetalia

"I'm the hero!" -America, Axis Powers Hetalia

"Make pasta, not war." -N. Italy, Axis Powers Hetalia

"So tell me, what's it like living in a constant haze of stupidity?" -Hiei, Yu Yu Hakusho

"It’s funny, Sasuke. We could’ve easily been standing in each other’s shoes right now." –Naruto, Naruto

"Man, security is tighter than...Shun's jeans!" –Dan, Bakugan: NV

"People fear the strange and unusual. I am the strange and unusual."

"When other little girls wanted to be ballerinas, I kinda wanted to be a VAMPIRE.:

"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it by not dying."

"Behind every successful man is a surprised woman."

"I'm going to try to be me, whoever that is..."

"I like you. When the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless."

"I'm not ALWAYS late. Sometimes I just don't show up."

"Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so waste your time and have the time of your life!"

"Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls."

"I’ve got problem for your solution…"

"You can’t be late until you show up."

"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."

"War doesn’t determine who’s right. War determines who’s left."

"Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way; wisdom is looking both directions anyway."

"Never interrupt your opponent while he’s making a mistake."

"You never learn anything by doing it right."

"Every rule has an exception, especially this one."

"Start every day off with a smile and get it over with."

"It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it."

"As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error."

"Fiction writing is great; you can make up almost anything."

"If you have noticed this notice you will have noticed that this notice is not worth noticing."

"The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend."

"Friends are God’s way of taking care of us."

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same."

"Everyone is a friend, until they prove otherwise."

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."

"Don't be so humble - you're not that great."

"I wrote your name in the sky, but the wind blew it away. I wrote your name in the sand, but the waves splashed it away. I wrote your name in my heart, and it lasted forever."

"Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them."

"Psychology Mind over matter Mind under matter? It doesn't matter. Never mind."

"Let's flip a coin. Heads, we’ll be together, tails, we'll flip again."

"My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil."

"Don't frown, even when you're sad, someone could be falling in love with your smile."

"Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each star to a reason I love you. I was doing fine until I ran out of stars."

"Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question."

"Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed and permanently set."

"When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear."

"If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?"

"Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are crazy?"

"When life hands you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade."

"He said, "I love you”, I laughed and said, 'Sorry, I'm allergic to BS.'"

"Of course I'm talking to myself. Who else can I trust?"

"I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers."

"I smile because I have no idea what's going on."

"Life was so simple when boys had cooties."

"I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love"

"I don't obsess! I think intensely."

"The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you."

"Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it."

"Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real."

"I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not."

"Why is it that people are fine with everyone having a different job or going to a different school, but if you say you follow a different religion, you are weird?"

"All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies."

"Note to Self: Normal is just a setting on washing machines."

"I would be more scared if you were aiming for the person next to me."

"My heart is not a playground."

"Did you just call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement."

"I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"

"If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you."

"What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy."

"Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world."

"Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm."

It is easier to get forgiveness than permission."

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian; any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."

Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it."

A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it."

Those who cast the votes decide nothing. Those who count the votes decide everything."

"When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets."

"I can't die, because I'm the main character of my own life."

"I took the road less traveled... and got really freaking lost."

"The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists."

"Books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay. So everytime you read a book, you're going broke. And that's why I didn't do my book report!"

"Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads."

"The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears it is true."

"In a dog-eat-dog world the best thing to do is become a cat."

"First the good die young. Then the bad die old; thus leaving us with only politicians left."

"Rules are like paperclips. Meant to hold things together, fun to bend, and easy to twist out of shape."

"I hit rock bottom. Then I start digging."

"Everyone smiles in the same language."

"When life gives you oranges, throw them back and ask why everyone else got lemons."

"Those of you who think you know everything annoy those of us that do."

"Are you INSANE! ...no wait that's me."

"If you’re walking on thin ice, you might as well dance."

"Curiosity killed the cat, but I'm not a cat so that's not my problem."

"I'm worse than evil, I'm the author."

"If you come looking for trouble, you'll find it."

"By the time you've read this, you've already read it!"

"I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants."

"Right now I am having amnesia and deja vu at the same time; I think I've forgotten this before."

"Time flies like the wind, fruit flies like bananas."

"I don't like to repeat things, so listen carefully the first six times."

"When love is not madness, it is not love."-Pedro Calderon de la Barca

"If you have noticed this notice you will have noticed that this notice is not worth noticing."

"The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend."

"Friends are God’s way of taking care of us."

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same."

"Everyone is a friend, until they prove otherwise."

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."

"Don't be so humble - you're not that great."

"Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it."

"Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real."

"I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not."

"Why is it that people are fine with everyone having a different job or going to a different school, but if you say you follow a different religion, you are weird?"

"All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies."

"Note to Self: Normal is just a setting on washing machines."

"I would be more scared if you were aiming for the person next to me"

"My heart is not a playground."

"Did you just call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement."

"I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"

"If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you."

"What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy."

"Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world."

"Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm."

"It is easier to get forgiveness than permission."

"Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian; any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."

"Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it."

"A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it."

"Those who cast the votes decide nothing. Those who count the votes decide everything."

"When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets."

"I can't die, because I'm the main character of my own life."

"I took the road less traveled... and got really freaking lost."

"The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists."

"Books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay. So everytime you read a book, you're going broke. And that's why I didn't do my book report!"

"Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker."

"Forget love - I'd rather fall in chocolate!" -Sandra J. Dykes

"When you get caught looking at him just remember he was looking back."

"When your down I may not be able to pick you back up, but I promise I'll be willing to lay down right next to you.

"You don't die of a broken heart... you only wish you did."

"People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world."

"Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up."

"I called your boyfriend "gay" and he hit me with his purse!"

"The toothfairy teaches kids it's okay to sell body parts."

"Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot."

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

"Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary."

"Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that."

"So what if we act like imature idiots? We're having fun."

"I like work. It fasinates me. I can sit and stare at it for hours."

"Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?"

"A word to the wise isn't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."

"I DONT obsess! I think intensley...and like all the time."

"Jogging is a slow sprinting, Coach!"

"If a synchronized swimmer drowns, does that mean they all have to?"

"I have CDO. It's like OCD but all of the letters are in alphabetical order...like they should be."

"I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned."

"Jesus saves. Passes to Moses, he shoots, he scores!!"

"Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over."

"Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?"

"Anyone else having trouble getting to Narnia?"

"Stereotyping? How do you type with a stereo?"

"DEATH: the number 1 killer in the U.S...tell your friends."

"Automatic doors make me feel like a JEDI!!"

"Hey stupid! Your sock is untied..."

"If my calculations are correct...slinkies escalator = EVERLASTING FUN!!"

"Procrastinators; the leaders of tomorrow."

"Tu madre. You just got burnt in Spanish."

"Chocolate is the answer no matter what the question is."

"We're so cool ice cubes are jealous."

"It's okay pluto. I'm not a planet either."

"Ever wonder why bologna and lasagna don't rhyme?"

"Laughing until your stomach hurts is what friends are for."

"If people were all meant to pop out of bed, we'd all sleep in toasters."

"Wanna hear a joke? ...Miley Cyrus."

"On a scale of 1 to crazy I'm a penguin."

"I don't get it...boys think girls are so complicatd. Haven't they met themselves?"

"I see no good reason to act my age."

"Be a dork!! Because being cool is overrated."

"At this moment, you're the oldest you've ever been. Pretty deep huh?"

"Worst time to have a heart attack; during a game of charades."

"If you're reading this then you're not dead. Good for you."

"I tried being normal, but I didn't like it."

"I was going to kill the ugliest person alive but then i thought I'd let your mom live one more day."

"Be yourself. That's crazy enough."

"You always get whats coming to you; unless it gets lost in the mail."

"Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is."

"I have animal magnetism-- when I go outside, squirrels stick to my sleeves."

"I have not lost my mind; its backed up on a disk somewhere."

"I am reading a most interesting book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down."

"How come when you mix water with flour, you get glue and then when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go?"

"If everything seems to be going well, you obviously overlooked something."

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall through a sewer hole and die."

"Hell is full of musical amateurs."

"I'm the kind of person who walks into a chair and apologizes."

"-sticks hand in electric box- CHIDORI!!"

"If you had a life you would stop talking about mine."

"We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!"

"Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever, you keep on talking."

"The below statement is true."

"The above statement is false."

"Don't make me angry, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies."

"Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy? Take him into a round room and tell him to sit in a corner."

"In a world of cheerios, be a fruit loop!"

"God must love stupid people...he made so many."

"There is no great genius without a mixture of madness."

"When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded."

"You, you, and you panic. The rest of you follow me."

"Lately the only thing keeping me from becoming a serial killer is my dislike for manual labor."

"If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with nonsense."

"One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor."

"I'm mature and you're not. Nah nah nah nah nah nah!"

"I have a dream and in it, something eats you."

"It's sad your own mom dresses you like that."

"Everyone is beautiful on the inside. If you think bones and guts are beautiful."

"It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then its hysterical."

"Looking for a perfect girl? Go buy yourself a barbie doll."

"If idiots could fly this place would be an airport."

"I know KUNG-FU and 42 other dangerous words."

"Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhh its a secret!"

"Quick, whats the number for 9-1-1?"

"You should always proofread what you write in case you any words."

"I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap out a better conversation than you."

"I ran into my ex today. Then I put it in reverse and hit him again."

"By the time you finished reading this you'll realize you just wasted 5 seconds of your life."

"I burst laughing out in class today...I got that joke you told yesterday."

"Hi! I'm human. What are you?"

"Have you considered suing your brain for non-support?"

"I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass!"

"Everyone has a right to be ugly, but you're abusing that privilege."

"If we were to kill everyone who thought you were stupid, it wouldn't be murder; it would be genocide!"

"I'd like to leave you with one thought...but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it!"

"Wherever there is life there is love."

"I may not be perfect but at least I'm confident."

"Sometimes all we need are each other."

"Life is like a circle. No wonder I'm so dizzy."

"A friend would call you a retard but a best friend would call you one and act like one with you."

"Boys break our hearts, so why don't we break their necks?"

"One night, I looked up into the sky. I began counting the reasons why I love you. I was doing great until I ran out of stars."

"When they laugh, we'll laugh along too. Because we know better. We know."

"I wanted to send you something SEXY... but the mail man told me to get out of the mail box..."

"Patience is what parents have when there are witnesses!"

"When you call us BITCHES we just look at each other and crack up, because we knew that WAAAAAAAAAAY BEFORE YOU DID!"

"Am I pissing you off-fa-fa?"-Peanut

"We are the people our parents warned us about!"

"Someone told me its illegal to kill someone for pissing you off...crap...!"

"I have the kind of friends where if my house was burning down, they'd be roasting marshmallows and flirting with the firemen!"

"Grant me the serenity to accept things I can not change... And the shovel to hide the bodies of those who piss me off..."

"Its not that I'm not a "people person"... its just that I'm not a "stupid people person."

"If I promise not to kill you... can I have a hug?"

"Exactly how much fun can I have before I go to hell?"

"HELL- Where all the fun people end up!"

"They keep saying the right person will come along... I think a truck hit mine!"

"It better to have loved and lost then to live with the PSYCHO the rest of your life!"

"Only You!... can help me hide the bodies!"

"I'm smiling cause I'm your sister, I'm laughing cause there's nothing you can do about it!"

"When I die, I'm going to haunt the HELL out of you people!"

"Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt."

"Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think it's Collin."

"A day without light is, well, night."

"Those who cannot remember the past are going to spend a lot of time in mall parking lots looking for their cars."

"I can only please on person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either."

"I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by."

"If you're forced to choose between two evils, choose the one you've never tried before."

"I wondered why the Frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me."

"You want us to fly off to save the world on Happy The Dragon?"-Jason Grace.

"Ever had a flying burrito hit you? Well, it's a deadly projectile, right up there with cannonballs and grenades." -Percy

"Now we can eat peanut butter sandwiches and ride fish ponies! We can fight monsters and see Annabeth and make things go BOOM!"-Tyson

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!"
Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!" -Blackjack and Mr. D

"Can't we just call them evil storm spirits? Venti makes them sound like evil espresso drinks."-Leo Valdez

"Hey!" said the guy in the video. "Greetings from your friends at Camp Half-Blood, et cetera. This is Leo. I'm the..." He looked off screen and yelled: "What's my title? Am I like admiral or captain, or-"
A girl's voice yelled back, "Repair boy."
"Very funny, Piper," Leo grumbled. He turned back to the parchment screen. "So yeah, I'm...ah...supreme commander of the Argo II. yeah, I like that! Anyway, we're gonna be sailing toward you in about, I dunno, an hour in this big warship. We'd appreciate it if you'd not, like, blow us out of the sky or anything. So okay! If you could tell the Romans that. See you soon. Yours in demigodishness, and all that. Peace out."-Leo Valdez and Piper McLean

"Cheese," she muttered, looking sideways. "Ella doesn't like cheese."-Ella the harpy

"Um...is that thing tame?" Frank said.
The horse whinnied angrily.
"I don't think so," Percy guessed. "He just said, 'I will trample you to death, silly Chinese Canadian baby man.'"-Frank Zhang, Percy Jackson, and Percy translating Arion.

"Hazel," Percy said, "I am seriously going to wash your horse's mouth with soap. ..."-Percy Jackson

When they ran up to him, Percy said, "Hey," like they were just meeting for lunch or something.
"You're alive!" Frank marveled.
Percy frowned. "The fall? That was nothing. I fell twice that far from the St. Louis Arch."
"You did what?" Hazel asked.-Percy Jackson, Frank Zhang, Hazel Levesque

"Don't I get a kiss for luck? Its kind of a tradition, right?"-Percy Jackson, The Last Oympian.

"Go chase a donut!'-Percy Jackson, The Sea of Monsters

"I wasn't sure where the Latin came from, i think it meant ' Eat my pants!'"-Percy Jackson, The Lightning Thief

"Your pretty smug Lord Ares, for a guy who runs from Cupid statues."-Percy Jackson, The Lightning Thief

"New lesson, class. Most monsters will vaporize when sliced with a celestial bronze sword. This change is perfectly normal, and will happen to you right now if you don't BACK OFF!"-Percy Jackson, The Battle of the Labyrinth

"I nodded, looking at Rachel with respect. 'You hit the Lord of the Titans in the eye with a blue plastic hairbrush.'"-Percy Jackson, The Batle of the Labyrinth

"That's right, you smelly bucket of nose drool!"-Percy Jackson, The Sea of Monsters

"With great power, comes the great need to take a nap. Wake me up later."-Nico di Angelo, The Last Olympian

"In the times of gods and monsters, what is the worth of a man?"-Nick Fury, Avengers

“English doesn’t borrow from other languages. English follows other languages down dark alleys, knocks them over and goes through their pockets for loose grammar.”
― James Nicoli

I, soldier YoursTrulyJaneDoe am part of the Fangirls Army, under command of General LouissaSpitfire, and promise :

To remember Robin every time I see a guy with awesome shades, somebody who's hacking something or when I go at the circus.

To remember Megan every time I eat cookies or when I watch some lame sitcom.

To remember Wally every time I see a ginger and every time a guy uses some lame pick-up lines on me.

To remember Kaldur every time I go to the beach, every time a friend is in charge.

To remember Superboy every time I see somebody destroying his T-shirt.

To remember Artemis every time I annoy a ginger, every time I act like a spitfire, or when I watch a movie about a ninja girl who's ninja dad ordered her to kill her ninja boyfriend 'cause he was from a rival ninja clan.

To remember Zatanna every time I hear something spoken backwards.

To remember Roy every time somebody doesn't trust me.

To remember Red Tornado every time human customs elude me.

I swear to support Spitfire, Supermartian, & Daddybats till my last breath

I swear whenever I see a couple in a love/hate relationship to think "they're such a spitfire couple!"

I swear whenever I dissappear or reappear out of nowhere, to do a Robin cackle

I swear whenever I see a ginger flirting to think of Wally

I swear whenever I hear someone say they're over/underwhelmed to say, "Your over/underwhelmed, he was over/underwhelmed, why isn't anyone just whelmed?"

I swear whenever I see a girl hit a boy upside the head to think of Artemis

I swear whenever I realize I did someting stupid to say,"Hello Megan!" *facepalms*

I swear whenever I hear a boy say, "we're gonna laugh about this someday" to think "he is pulling a robin"

I swear whenever I see a guy get dumped by his girlfriend to be with his friend to think, "He and Kaldur are in the same boat"

I swear to hate Superman until he accepts Conner, until then I'll send him krptonite in the mail

I swear whever I hear someone say, they hate monkeys, to think of Conner

I swear to be ever loyal to Spitfire's Fangirl Army

The Percy Jackson pledge:

I promise to remember Percy
whenever I'm at sea
I promise to remember Annabeth
whenever a spider comes at me
I promise to protect nature
for Grover's sake of course
I promise to remember Luke
when my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Chiron
whenever I see a sign that says ''free pony ride''
I promise to remember Tyson
whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side
I promise to remember Thalia
whenever a friend is scared of heights
I promise to remember Clarisse
whenever I see someone that gives me a fright
I promise to remember Bianca
whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother
I promise to remember Nico
whenever I see someone who doesn't get along with others
I promise to remember Zoe
whenever I watch the stars
I promise to remember Rachel
whenever a limo passes my car.
yes I promise to remember PJO
wherever I may go

The Kane Chronicles Pledge

I promise to remember Carter

When I travel far away

I promise to remember Sadie

When I have something sarcastic to say

I promise to remember Desjardins

When someone doesn't fight fair

I promise to remember Amos

When someone has beads in their hair

I promise to remember Iskandar

When I see someone very old

I promise to remember Bast

When I see cat's eyes that are gold

I promise to remember Horus

When I see a beautiful bird

I promise to remember Isis

Whenever strange voices are heard

I promise to remember Set

When someone is clever and sly

I promise to remember Anubis

When a cute boy catches my eye

I promise to remember Zia

When I see someone working magic

I promise to remember Julius Kane

When someone's life is tragic

I promise to remember Ruby Kane

When someone I love is gone

And whenever I read The Red Pyramid

I'll always remember this song.

Ouran Alphabet ( by YoursTrulyJaneDoe so please credit me if you re-post this)

A is for Adventures that show up around every corner.

B is for Beelzenef so BEWARE!

C is for Cuddles that Honey-Sempai loves to give.

D is for Daddy's only daughter who seems to hate him so.

E is for Enormous debt which Haruhi is forces to pay off.

F is for Fantasies the Host Club fulfills.

H is for Hot because they certainly are.

I is for I love you! Which everyone seems to do.

J is for Jovial Tamaki and his extravagance.

K is for Kill what Kyouya will do if you wake him up in the morning.

L is for Lobelia, the lesbians we love to hate.

M is for Motherly love something both Tamaki and Haruhi have been missing.

N is for Nobody getting in the way of their family.

O is for Obsession that Renge seems to have for Haruhi.

P is for Prince. Something Nekozawa has always wanted to be.

Q is for Quizzical. The relationship between Tamaki and Haruhi.

R is for Resentment what for wanted because Honey got a cavity.

S is for Servant something Mori was originally to Honey but they're really much more.

T is for Twincest the thing we all wish Hikaru and Kaoru really had.

U is for Usa- Chan Honey's best friend.

V is for Veil something that Kyouya uses to hide who he truly is.

W is for Wanting something you can't have like Hikaru does with Haruhi.

X is for Xenomania something Tamaki used to have for Japan.

Y is for Yearning the kind Kaoru hid away to help him brother with Haruhi.

Z is Zillions the only number the might satisfy Kyouya.

sing this to the tune of Jingle Bells!

Crashing through the snow, on an automation horse drawn sleigh

Over the shields we go, Kronos' mintions exploding away!

Bells on Blackjacks' wing, Riptide shining bright

What fun it is to swing and slash our swords and clubs tonight!

Oh! Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way

Fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs O'Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads of Monsters as she comes to Percy's aid.

A dream or two ago, I saw a rising tide,

A horse and eagle fight, a thunder bolt by my side,

The eagle got hit and sank, some time the horse had bought,

Poseidon's face turned blank as he foiled Zeus' plot!

Oh! Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way

Fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs O'Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads of Monsters as she comes to Percy's aid. Yay!

Oh! Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way

Fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs O'Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads of Monsters as she comes to Percy's aid. Yay!

Oh! Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Percy's on his way

Fighting lots of monsters as he comes to save the day, Hey!

Kronos smells, Kronos smells, Mrs O'Leary's come to play,

Chewing the heads of Monsters as she comes to Percy's aid.

I did NOT make up these lyrics, but it would be cool if I had!

Sugar,spice and everything nice

That is what girls are made of

Whales, pails, and puppy dog tails

That is what boys are made of

Secrets, lies, and things that make spies

That is what the team is made of

The YJ constitution

'We, as the men of Young Justice, in order to please Black Canary, establish honor and bravery, insure that we will ask out a girl, promise to not chicken out, provide moral support for each other, promote the union of the pair, and secure the blessing of nonsingleism, for ourselves and our dates, do ordain and establish this agreement for the Young Justice team.' (this was kind of stupid but I love Young Justice so whatever.)

Poems

Cinderella walked on broken glass Sleeping Beauty let a whole lifetime pass
Belle fell in love with a hideous beast
Jasmine married a common thief
Ariel walked on land for love and life
Snow white just barely escaped a knife
It was all blood, sweat & tears
Because love means facing your biggest fears.

The freshman girl, oh so shy, sits and watches the sophmore guy.
The sophmore guy, with his head in a whirl, sits and watches the junior girl.
The junior girl, in her red sedan, sits and watches the senior man.
The senior man, all hot and wild, secrety loves the freshman child.

One dark day, in the middle of the night,

Two dead brothers came out to fight.

Back to back they faced eachother.

Brought out knives and shot eachother.

The deaf police man heard their cries.

The doctor came to watch them die.

If you don't believe this lie true,

Ask the blind man, he saw it too.

Quizes

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 81, and find line 4.

"NO bubble Baths pleeeeease!!!!" -The Ultimate Fun Book

2.Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, What can you touch?

Oxygen, Nitrogen and other airs/pollutants.

3.What is the last thing you watched on TV?

The return of Superman.

4.Without looking, guess what time it is:

12:20-ish PM

look at the clock. What is the actual time?

2:16 PM

6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

Cars and the wind blowing through the trees.

7.When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Yesterday. Swinging on a Hammock.

8.Before you started this survey, what did you look at.

Batman's Favorite Daughter's Profile

9.What are you wearing

A purple tee-shirt with a ninja that says "peeka boo...Ninja

sees you." and black shorts with lots of pockets.

10.Did you dream last night?

No.

11.When did you last laugh?

A couple minutes ago. I like to laugh.

12.What is on the walls of the room you are in?

An Akatsuki poster, a picture of Robin and Kid Flash, a picture of Jack Spicer, and a picture of the Justice League.

13.Seen anything weird lately?

My brothers.

14. What do you think of this quiz?

Kind of fun and creepy at the same time.

15. What is the last film you saw?

The Return of Superman.

16. If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?

Everything and Robin. For sure Robin.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:

I have a fear of aquariums.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

I would would make it possible for people to have superpowers.

19. Do you like to dance?

YES!!!

20. George Bush:

Part of the Illuminati.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

Alice.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?

Artemis, Ivan, or Peter.

23. What advice would you give your kids?

Don't listen to other people they're probably stupider then you.

PJO QUIZ

1. If you could hang out anywhere in Camp Half-Blood, where would it be?

Hades Cabin or Percy's Cabin.

2. Which PJatO Character Would You Date?

NICO!!!! and Percy but, he's taken FOREVER.

3. Which PJatO Character Is Your Best Friend?

Percy.

4. Which PJatO Character Do You Hate?

Drew, she's a bitch. (excuse my language.)

5. Your Favorite PJatO book?

All of them but, I really like the Last Olympian.

6. Your Favorite PJatO Character?

Percy.

7. Favorite God or Goddess?

Phobos.

8. Percy walks up to you, what do you do?

Kiss him. Then faint, and then wake up. Then fangirl. Really loud

9. You just got 2 tickets to go see a concert, who do you take with you?

Robin.

10. You accidentally got stranded on a deserted island...who got stranded with you?

Mrs. O'Leary, She can shadow-travel.

11. Hermes asked you to help him repopulate Olympus...what is your answer to this disturbing question?

Depends on what form he's in?

12. Favorite PJatO Pairing?

Percabeth. What kind of question is that.

13. You and the Big Three are on Olympus...??

I would ramble and probably tell them random information, like the fact that I'm afraid of Aquariums or something.

14. If you could spend your Friday Nights doing something, what would it be?

Reading...Oh wait, you meant at Camp Half-Blood? Hitting on Nico, Archery, reading. He... I like to read.

15. Favorite PJatO Quote?

"My dear young cousin, if there's one thing I've learned over the eons, it's that you can't give up on your family, no matter how tempting they make it. It doesn't matter if they hate you, or embarrass you, or simply don't appreciate your genius for inventing the Internet--”- Hermes

16. Favorite Percy Moment?

I just love Percy so much that isn't a fair question. “[My mom's funny that way, celebrating special occasions with blue food. I think it's her way of saying anything is possible. Percy can pass seventh grade. Waffles can be blue. Little miracles like that.”

17. Favorite Nico Moment?

"With great power...comes the need to take a nap."

18. Favorite god or goddess Moment?

When Mars gives them the prophecy, I laughed my face off.

19. Favorite Grover Moment?

“Ever had a flying burrito hit you? Well, it's a deadly projectile, right up there with cannonballs and grenades.”

20. Favorite Random Moment?

When Nico kept asking Percy random questions when they first met.

1) Percabeth or Prachel? Percabeth.

2) Favorite guy character? Percy.

3) Favorite girl character? Thalia

4) Favorite god? Phobos

5) Favorite goddess? Athena.

6) Zeus, Posiedon, or Hades? Hades

7) Is Luke hot? Depends in my mind yes, but not they way they draw him.

8) Would you join the hunters? NO, I like me some boys.

9) Archery or sword fighting? Archery.

10) Iris Messaging or Hermes Express? Iris Messaging I think it's faster.

11) Favorite minor god/goddess? Morpheus, he's so cool.

12) Favorite book? All of them.

13) Least favorite? NONE, how dare you even ask this.

14) Would you live year round at Camp Half-Blood or just go in the summer? Just for the summer. I like school and my friends.

15) Favorite couple? Percabeth. We've been over this.

16) Are you a demi-god? Don't remind me of what I'm not.

17) Who would be your parent? Phobos

18) Favorite minor character? The Stoll Brothers

19) Ethan or Luke? Luke, because he had a legitimate reason to be pissed.

20) Favorite monsters? Mrs. O'Leary

Narutard Quiz

1. Who is your favorite Naruto character(s)? - Sasuke, Itachi, Deidara, Sasori, Gaara, Kakashi,

2. What is your favorite pairing(s)? - NaruHina & NejiTen

3. Are you a Naruto yaoi or hentai fan? - Not really.

4. Ever cosplayed Naruto characters? If so, who, where and how many times? -Itachi 3 times

5. List your collection of Naruto junk and merchandise, if any: - Posters and a iron on patch and action figures and a dvd set.

6. Have you ever felt that you were destined to be with a Naruto character? If so, who? - YES, because Sasuke is my soulmate and we're going to be together forever.

7. NaruHina or KibaHina? - NaruHina.

8. SasuSaku or SasuNaru? - Neither, he's mine. *hiss*

9. Which team is your favorite? Team 7 or Team Gai? - Team Gai because they're really funny.

10. Do you support the obito theory? (Tobi= Obito) - No, it's stupid Tobi is *spoiler* Madara.

11. Do you support the 'Yondaime is Naruto's father' theory? - That has been made a fact. So, duh I support it.

12. Your favorite Akatsuki member?- Tobi cause he's so cute and he's secretly a super,awesome powerful guy!!

13. Are you Pro-Sasuke or Anti-Sasuke? - Pro-Sasuke, FOREVER!!!!

14. Have you seen all Naruto episodes so far (including Shippuden, and fillers?) - No, but I plan finishing it eventually.

15. Have you read all the chapters so far? - No, have yet to read the manga.

16. Do you believe Naruto has ADD? - No, he clearly has ADHD. Clearly.

17. Sub or dub? - Dub, it's cool how the actors use their voices.

18. Pro-Sakura or Anti-Sakura? - Anti-Sakura, she's a female dog.

19. Tobi = Annoying or funny? - He is ssoooooooooooooo Funny and cute and amazing... I'm getting off subject.

20. Do you even know who Tobi is? - He is Madara. Duh.

21. Gai = Sexy beast or Ugly nerd? - Neither, he's a riot.

22. Which character would be the best crossdresser? - Lee

23. Rock Lee = Weird or Awesome? - Weirdly awesome.

24. Which character would be best OOC? Who and how? - I don't know.

25. Do you like Naruto fanfics? - Yes.

26. Do you write Naruto fanfics? - Yes.

27. Do you like lemons? - Maybe?

28. Do your parents know about the Naruto characters? - Yes!! My dad is a total supporter.

29. Have you watched the Naruto Abridged Series? - Yeah! It was so funny. I laughed my face off.

30. Have you seen The Naruto Ultimate Fanflashes? -No, but now I'm going to.

31. Have you ever gotten someone else hooked on Naruto? - Yes, my brother.

32. Have you ever been drawing Naruto in school and has someone recognized it? - Yes, but I wasn't drawing I suck at drawing. I was flipping through pictures.

33. Have you ever been in class drawing Naruto and the teacher came up to you and said 'WTF is this?' - No.

34. Has Naruto affected your school life and grades? - No.

35. Are you broke thanks to Naruto? - Nope.

36. Do you want to read Icha Icha Paradise? - I'm kind of curious.

37. Do you support the 'Yondaime is the Akatsuki Leader' theory? - No because Tobi is. Duh.

38. Do you draw Naruto fanart? If so, count how many there are in your gallery? - No, I can't draw.

39. Is Sasuke still sexy in his second stage of the cursed seal? - Yeah and anyone who says differently can die.

40. Do you have a Naruto OC? - Yes.

41. Looking back at some of your answers, do you think Naruto has taken over your life? - The beginning of it. Now I'm not so into it.

Mushy Stuff!

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

A true boyfriend

When she walks away from you mad, follow her. When she stares at your mouth,kiss her. When she pushes you or hit's you, grab her and don't let go. When she start's cussing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her. When she's quiet, ask her whats wrong. When she ignores you, give her your attention. When she pull's away, pull her back. When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful. When you see her start crying, just hold her and don't say a word. When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind. When she's scared, protect her. When she lay's her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her. When she steal's your favorite hat, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night. When she tease's you, tease her back and make her laugh. When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay. When she look's at you with doubt, back yourself up. When she say's that she like's you she really does more than you could understand. When she grab's at your hands, hold her's and play with her fingers. When she bump's into you bump into her back and make her laugh. When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold. When she looks at you in your eyes don't look away until she does. When she misses you she's hurting inside. When you break her heart the pain never really goes away. When she says its over she still wants you to be hers. When she re-post this bulletin she wants you to read it. - Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go.- When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her.- Because 10 yrs later she'll remember you.- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her.- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up.- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.- Tease her and let her tease you back.- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.- Give her the world.- Let her wear your clothes.- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.- Let her know she's important.- Kiss her in the pouring rain.- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's butt am I kicking, Sweetie??" If you post this in the next five minutes the one you love will : Call you. Kiss you. Love you. Text you. Guys post as: "I'd be this boyfriend." Girls post as: "A true boyfriend. " or " What a boyfriend should do."

What a kiss means...

Kiss on the stomach (Who kisses someone there?)= "I'm ready"
Kiss on the Forehead = "I hope we're together forever"
Kiss on the Ear = "You're my everything"
Kiss on the Cheek = "We're friends"
Kiss on the Hand = "I adore you"
Kiss on the Neck = "we belong together"
Kiss on the Shoulder = "I want you"
Kiss on the Lips = "I love you"

What the gesture means...

Holding Hands = "we definitely love each other"
Slap on the Butt= "That's mine" (Guys, little tip. If you want to get ANYWHERE with a girl, don't you DARE do that unless you've ALREADY gotten somewhere.)
Holding on tight = "I don't want to let go"
Looking into each others Eyes = "I just plain love you"
Playing with Hair = "Tell me you love me"
Arms around the Waist = "I love you too much to let go"
Laughing while Kissing = "I am completely comfortable with you"
picking someone up off their feet = "that they love them fully and would do anything for them"

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality they are amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

Life comes around once,

so share it with the right person

find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot

who calls you back when you hang up on him

who will stay awake just to watch you sleep

wait for the guy who kisses your forehead

who wants to show you off to the world when your in sweats

who holds your hand in front of his friends

who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you

who turns to his friends and says 'that's her'.

If this doesn't touch you; you're heartless. This is so sad! One night a guy and a girl were driving home from the movies.The girl asked the guy to pull over because she wanted to talk. She told him that her feelings had changed & that it was time to move on. A silent tear slid down his cheek as he slowly reached into his pocket & passed her a folded note. At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down that very same street. He swerved right into the drivers seat, killing the boy. Miraculously the girl survived.Remembering the note,she pulled it out & read it, it said,"Without your love, I would die".

Post this on your profile if it touched you, or if you would die without your mate's love.

I WANT A GUY...

who would move the hair away from my eyes and then kiss me,

hold my hand in line at the mall and make all the girls jealous.

Someone who would sing to me at random moments.

Who would let me sleep on his chest.

A BOY who would get mad at someone if they called me UGLY or were mean to me.

I want someone who would call me 3 times a day if he went away.

Someone who would let me gossip to him

and just smile and agree with everything I said.

He would throw stuffed animals at me when I acted dumb and then

KISS ME A MILLION TIMES.

Someone who would make fun of me just to make me laugh.

He would take me to the park and

put his hands around my waist and

give me big bearhugs all the time.

He would tell all his friends about me and SMILE when he did.

And we'd make out in the pouring rain.

He would never be afraid to say "I love you" in front of his friends,

and we'd argue about silly things and then make up.

I want a boy who would kiss me at midnight on New Years

and COUNT STARS with me.

Who would stay home with me on a Friday night

just to help me make dinner and watch movies together under the same blanket.

Someone who would tell me I'm beauiful but not too often,

who would make me laugh like NO ONE else could.

But mostly, I want someone who would be my best friend and would never BREAK MY HEART

Sad Stuff

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back.
The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.
The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.'
Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''
Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.
The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.
Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas.
She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.
But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.'
His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
My heart nearly stopped.
The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.'
Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.'
'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.'
Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''
'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.
The little boy said, 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!'
Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!''
'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''
'My mommy loves white roses.'
A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.
I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started.
I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.
Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.
The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.
Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.
I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.
I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.
And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Now you have 2 choices:
1) Repost this message, or
2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart.

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.- I believe in God!!

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it.

When you were 5, your mom gave you an ice-cream cone. You thanked her by yelling at her that it's the wrong kind.

When you were 9, your mom drove you from swimming to soccer to soccer and one birthday party to another. You thanked her by slamming the door and never looking back.

When you were 10, your mom paid for piano classes. You thanked her by never coming to class.

When you were 12, your mom was waiting for a very important call. You thaned her by talking on the phone all night.

When you were 14, your mom paid for a month away at summer camp. You thanked her by not bothering to write a single letter.

When you were 16, your mom taught you how to drive her car. You thanked her by taking it every chance you got.

When you were 18, your mom cried at your high school graduation. You thanked her by partying until dawn.

When you were 20, your mom drove you to college. You thanked her by saying goodbye outside the dorm so you wouldn't have to in front of your friends.

When you were 26, your mom paid for your wedding. You thanked her by moving halfway across the world.

When you were 30, your mom fell ill and needed you to take care of her. You thanked her by reading about the burden parents are to their children.

Then on night she died quietly and everything you did came crashing down on you.

If you love your mom, copy and paste this in your profile. If you don't, then you won't care if your mom dies, will you?