![]() Author has written 2 stories for Twilight. Well im a girl i live somewhere in grand ole Texas I'm white blonde big dark blue eyes short i love the twilight saga especially breaking dawn and i am currently obsessed with the Hunger Games. If you haven't read them...READ THEM! it was amazing Thats about it. WE LOVE YOU CHARLES!!(namechange) A True Boyfriend: When she walks away from you mad How Sad is This?? A rich couple's son had gone to war and two weeks before he would be allowed to return home the couple recieved a call from him. "Mom... Dad can I bring home a friend from the army?" they were appalled by the question and replied: "Why can't he go to his own house?" The phone was silent for a moment until the son replied. "He's afraid his mother and father wont love him anymore. Because well... while we were fighting a gun went off and shot him in two places- his forearm and his shin. They had to amputate both of the limbs. He also has third degree burns on his face and from what he told me about his parents this is enough to make them no longer love him." The parents said, "Doesn't he have any other friends he can go live with? We have no use for handicapped people here." "Everyone else is dead mom," he told them sadly. The parents didn't think when they replied "Well handicapped people need to learn to make a living on their own for they are stupid and have lesser abilities than normal people. I forbid you to bring this young man home with you he must make it on his own." The son hung up the phone without saying good bye. Two weeks later while they were waiting for there son to come home when they heard a loud shot from outside there house and ran outside. There on the ground lay their dead son with a gun in his hand. But their son was different. He was missing two limbs and one side of his face was red and melted. They realized with horror that they had told their son that he was worthless. Handicapped people are just as able to do things as us. This man fought for us and wasn't excepted when he returned home. Judge people from their actions and not their looks. This is a true story. Top 75 Most Annoying Things To Do In An Elevator When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on. Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?" Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator. Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment. Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers. Ask, "Did you feel that?" Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!" Swat at flies that don't exist. Tell people that you can see their aura. Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!" Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers. Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!" Put police tape in front of the door before entering. Fart loudly when there are only two of you in the elevator. Argue vehemently that it wasn't you. Hold an auction. Do the "potty dance" all the way to the elevator door. Upon arrival, sigh and look greatly relieved. Ask every passenger coming if you can borrow a tampon. Especially effective if victim is male. Even more effective if you yourself are male. Throw a rave. Place potted plants and water fountains at strategic locations in the lift. When people ask what you are doing, tell them you "won't ride an elevator that's not fung shwei." Greet everyone getting on with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral". Hum the first six notes of the "It's a small world" over and over again. When you brush past someone, whisper "Was it good for you too?" Lean over to another rider and whisper 'Noogie patrol coming!'" Have a heated debate with yourself. Bring a melon onto the elevator. Try to sell it to the other passengers. Drum on every available surface. Write a big X on the elevator floor, and hand out "pirate" maps to everyone as they enter. Give psychotherapy to the other passengers. Greet everyone coming on as if they were your best friend. Use the same name for all of them. Say "ring ring," then pull a banana out of your pocket and start talking into it. Propose to the other passengers. Challenge people to duels. Sell girl scout cookies. Bring a large pile of ice. Build an igloo on the floor. Come on looking really scared, and say to another passenger..."I'm kinda nervous...this is my first time flying..." Any time someone enters the doors, recoil in horror. Stick your tongue out. Act like it's a cigarette, and ask someone for a lighter. Pitch a tent on the floor, and "camp out" for the weekend. Play "I've got your nose" with the other passengers. Shout "Food fight!" Every time someone else talks, angrily shout: "Some people are trying to sleep here!" When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. Lick one of the buttons. Tell the other passengers you're sick and tired of people stealing your food the second you turn your back. Elevators were practically MADE for river dnce! Bring a snowboard onto the elevator. Put it on. Every time the lift goes up or down, shout "WOO-YEAH! This is what I call sick air!" Make sushi. Press your nose against the other passengers, and say "You know, this is what the Eskimos used to do before having sex." Shave. Every time the elevator goes down, loudly scream "OH MY GOD!! We're all gonna die! This is it! This is it! It's over! IT'S OVER!!" Look relieved when it stops moving. When you begin to drop again, repeat. Ask the other passengers if they want to see your glass clown collection. Practice your kung fu. Make race car noises when people get on and off. Ask everyone on the elevator: "Are you my mother?" Fly a model airplane. Do yoga. Play the accordion Enter the elevator with nothing on your head. Individually ask everyone if they like your hat. Bring a rocking chair. Sit and knit. Recite gangsta rap lyrics in monotone. Enter with a shovel, and attempt to "dig for treasure." Read "Green Eggs and Ham" at the top of your lungs. Sound out every word I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, asshole! Girls This is true! I don't really believe this but it's weird:This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. |