Thanks for the story. I enjoyed it. It was incomplete in spots and unrealistic in others. I would have changed some things around. I would have had them all hating each other but have the girls do the competition because they wanted to beat the other girls they hate instead of being threatened.
What happened to the other girls? I thought someone caused the accidents...? Guy in Hawaii? He made it sound like they would be seeing him again.
Story has real potential to be awesome and your writing isn’t bad. Thanks so much for sharing.

Rose’s logic about Bella dying and her last wish was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard. It didn’t even make any sense. Alice thought they should go after their upset friend which seemed logical to me. I’m sure Rosalie wasn’t meant to look selfish but that was what it looked like. I actually can’t believe that Alice said she had a point.
I also noticed that Bella described Jessica’s hair as red, maybe she is the one causing the accidents.
The boys said there was ONE more competition that would be completed by one set of girls. I thought that meant the girls won and the others would be leaving. Then they didn’t and than they are off to Hawaii. What happened to the competition?

God I hate when she runs.

Seems kind of silly for Bella to get upset over a 1200 dollar dress. They are both suppose to be rich and Edward must have spent 100s of thousands on this competition already. Didn’t really fit the situation. You should have just had Edward make a comment that she took a wrong way.

Is someone trying to take out the competition? Lights falling, elevator malfunction, something spilled stairs? I thought Jessica’s group but someone with red hair was turning the corner before Bella and Edward fell.

It takes hours to make a good spaghetti sauce.

Don’t understand why the person who can’t cook at all is making the entree. Doesn’t make any sense.
Why the hell are they acting like they care about this competition? They hate them and didn’t even want to be there. Now they’re actually lowering themselves by competing to be someone’s girlfriend.
Anything can go if there is some build up and it’s written correctly but they just went from deciding not to do well to busting there asses, there has even been crying.

How the hell would Jessica’s group come in second when the guys weren’t thrilled with there outfits when they modeled them? And nothing happened to Jessica after the cheating? That’s just wrong.

Seems a little silly and unrealistic but sounds like it may be a little fun. Like someone could threaten your whole life like that. The boys sound like they all lack character and I figure they will all end up together but I wish they wouldn’t.

Irina dies.

OH MY GODS! CONGRATS

AMAZING !Really love it!

Taylor Lautner went to your school!?

This story is far too childish & needs a healthy dose of reality. Nothing could be more beneficial for it. ;)
And seriously, BRUNG OUT? What the hell is that? It's BROUGHT OUT. And how can you write a 35K story but still doesn't know the difference between YOUR & YOU'RE? For heaven's and our poor brains' sake get a freaking beta will you.

this story id amazingly perfect and awesome 3