Gender: Female
Name: Dana
Age: 18
Residence: United States
Problems: Little crazy, sarcastic, mean, compulsive liar, easily upset, and about a million more things that I don't feel like listing.

About Me:
It really bothers me that people who write good stories don't finish them. Those of you out there, know who you are. I like different types of music. I mostly listen to anything. I do like country, classical, jazz, soft rock, alternative, you name it. The only music I hate is rap. I go to a small school and write some poetry on the side. If I write a story my updates take forever, mainly because I'm lazy, but sometimes things come up so whatever. And if I do write a story, I will finish it...sometime this century.

Hey, to everyone who put me on their Favorite Authors List: Hope you enjoy everything I'm writing. I know it's been awhile, but I'm working on it. Thanks for sticking with me.

Quotes that I love:

He didn't deserve and therefore wouldn't get.
- Nymph Du Pave

Word of caution: never get Angel angry, because then, not only is he invincible, he’s fucking scary.
-Prose

You can’t say that—you waited ten seconds. It isn’t true if you wait ten seconds.
-Velvet Death

What was that saying? Don’t argue with an idiot because they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you?
-Insomnia's Phone Number

They all have a 'I'm not in a bad mood but don't you dare fuck with me' look on their faces.
-Deluxcookies

Yeah, kid was only raised in a hell world, god forbid we should let him near projectile weapons. He might hurt himself.
-Doyle-sb

What? Why are you giving me that look? I haven't done anything... I think.
-Drakulya

Salty goodness is one thing. Salty nagging is another altogether.
- Gidgetgirl

Bribe is such an...unclean word. I love it.
-ShinodaBear

Go directly to hell, do not pass go, do not collect a hundred dollars.
- Azure K Mello

Hey! I have an idea! Let's write a threatening letter: it'll be fun."
- Azure K Mello

Petty? Yes. Rewarding? Certainly.
-Azure K Mello

Oh and how bad could that be right? It's only like having your still beating heart ripped out of your chest, stamped on, and handed to you on a platter with an olive sprig and a condescending voice asking if you can still be friends.
- Azure K Mello

I don't know! Hey, I'm sitting here questioning my sexuality and you can't even be bothered to put your book down.
- Azure K Mello

Well, I guess I'll take a shower and touch myself while thinking about you.
-Azure K Mello

What the hell would he do with a crying man in his living room?
-Mara Greengrass

And, gee, that didn’t sound pathetic or needy whatsoever.
-Pinklittlewitch

Angel! What have we told you about sneaking up on people? It’s rude. And creepy. Whistle or something when you come into a room.
- Pahoehoe

You strip off the rest of those clothes and let me lick you until you scream?
-VCCV

I’m a slut. I can tell sexual tension. It’s a gift.
-VCCV

Okay that’s not funny because well... fuck look at me. Who wouldn’t want me? Gay, straight, guy, girl. I’m fucking hot!
-Clockstopper

Why, if you poke me, do I not flinch? If you do something stupid, do I not smirk? If you write nasty articles about me, do I not faint?”
- Carrie H Potter

I could have gone my whole life without knowing that.
-Carrie H Potter

Oh God, how embarrassing. He sounded so...so...so straight!
-Miss Prongs

I know, the laughing hysterically until you couldn’t breathe sort of gave it away.
-Sorrel

Damn, Smallville, that is evil. And pretty fucking brilliant. I approve.
-Sorrel

He looked, even more than usual, like a total wet dream.
-Sorrel

Answer your goddamn cell phone.
-Sorrel

Yeah, the fight had been bad, but my God, was the make-up sex going to be fantastic!
-Isolde13

It is all he can come up with, what the panic overloading his brain and all.
-Isolde13

And surprise, surprise, temptation wins out.
-Isolde13

Curling up on the couch and watching a sappy movie isn't the same unless you're there groping me under the blanket.
-Chinadoll000

It was like watching a starving wounded puppy suffer... just not cool.
-Whatserface

Have you ever been angry and then hated yourself for it? Or, conversely, been angry and thought, “I had every right to be angry. Fuck off.”
-Pir8fancier

Who’d have thought that behind that shuffle and blush lurked a perverted wanker?
-Pir8fancier

I'm just watching a toddler eat candy off the floor.
-EscapeToCity

It reminded me that I haven't seen my therapist in over a month.
-Miss Meehan

I wonder if Heaven has cable.
-Buffyandspike-4ever

It was like some sick, cosmic joke.
-Weesta

There should be a rule that you can't be mad at me if I didn't do anything.
-Tinanit Enozym

The story was interesting to say the least, smutty to say the most.
-JenniferButterflyGirl

Did he just bow? What a self-righteous prick.
Barbarella

Does that satisfy your sick, twisted little mind? Well? Does it?
Barbarella

I am not allowed to wear death eater robes to dinner and shout ‘Long live Lord Voldemort’, just because I think it’s funny.
Barbarella

I am not allowed to ask Professor Lupin about the mating habits of werewolves because his personal life is none of my business.
Barbarella

I am not allowed to have sexual relations with Harry Potter under his invisibility cloak because all though people can’t see us, they can still hear us.
Barbarella

I am not allowed to smack people at random and blame it on a seizure.
Barbarella

I am not allowed to use Colin Creevey’s camera to take ‘inappropriate’ pictures of the quidditch teams without their knowledge or consent.
Barbarella

One day, you're eavesdropping on a sex god, the next you're up close and personal with the dentally misfortunate. Yeah, life is like a box of Bertie Bott's Beans. You never know what you're gonna get.
-SnippyandSnarky

That's it! If you two don't stop eating my food and accusing me of sleeping with people, I'm going to feed you to the spiders.
-SnippyandSnarky

Like who I marry affects who I sleep with.
-SnippyandSnarky

Oh, I don’t think you ought to trust me. I wouldn’t trust me if I were you. Actually, I don’t trust me come to think of it.
-Iamanevilgenius

Life really isn’t fair, is it? Yes, life isn’t fair. It’s just fairer than death, that’s all. And I’m yakking. But I tend to do this when I’m nervous. And I’m really, really nervous.
-Iamanevilgenius

But the voices in my head made me do it! They were driving me mad!
-Iamanevilgenius

God pretended not to notice the odd look he was getting from Lucifer.
-Iamanevilgenius

Let’s draw the attention of a full-grown homicidal mountain troll today, shall we? It’s on my To Do List.
-Iamanevilgenius

Now, where was I? Oh yes, on the agenda of World Domination is DOOM! DOOM, do you hear me! I shall destroy the world!
-Iamanevilgenius

I mean, what kind of doctor does that. ‘Hey, hello, nice to meet you and all, but we ran these tests, figuring that something was wrong. When we discovered, to our utter shock, that something was, in fact, wrong, we talked over it and came to the conclusion that there was nothing that we can do for you, because there is no precedent. We’re so sorry we couldn’t find any treatment, but we managed to estimate the time of your death, at the rate the disease is going, that should make you feel better. Sorry, nothing else we can do, have a great life. For a little while.’ Christ, those bastards.
-Eternalpessimist

What? No! No denial! I'm perfectly straight! I mean, I don't have a problem with you being gay or anything, but I'm SO not.
-Poet Of Darkness 5

Now this may sting a bit at first, but don't worry, that'll go away as soon as the searing pain kicks in. Feel free to scream.
-Poet Of Darkness 5

Cause you're getting that look again. I've been seeing it more and more. The one where it looks like you want to hug me or something. It gives me the creeps.
-JDSampson

The past is hard to ignore when it walks up and slaps you in the face.
-Lady Ophelia

Oh, ok. I just died a little inside. Please continue.
- Glow2

Yes, Weasley, because that’s what’s important right now! We’re all going to die, but that doesn’t matter because Malfoy’s a pouf!
-Newtypeshadow

When a child breaks it is never a pretty sight. When their young souls shatter into a million pieces, when their bodies lie still and silent, shells and living corpses—adults break beautifully, ‘tis true, but there is something darkly compelling about a broken child.
-Wild Wolf Free17

Light is—well, every good thing you can imagine multiplied by forever. Then add in cheesecake.
-Wild Wolf Free17

You do know that whole transsexual thing was just a rumour right?
- Muggleborn Fairy

Harry, listen, I know me breaking up with you was hard but dating married, straight men is not the answer, I can give you the number to my therapist if you want.
- Muggleborn Fairy

Fine. I’ll help you. But any more McBitchy comments and you’re going to get McBitch-slapped, got it?
-Ms.Brightside

You two can be the parents that teach him about all the unimportant stuff like responsibility and the lot, while I will teach him the important stuff like the art of lying around and pranking
-Someonesgurl

We're making a surprise for you. We promise that it won't cause any bodily harm, any changing or adding of limbs, or anything else unnatural like that.
-Someonesgurl

Dude, keep your grubby mitts off my soul. What kind of pervert are you?
-H.T.Marie

Oh god, here we go. A lecture from Mr. Perfect. That’s exactly what I wanted when I woke up this morning.
-Winged Seraph

Well when you put it like that it sounds pathetic.
-Kymmethy

Come on, lets leave so I can get you more drunk and take advantage of you. Oh, did I just say that out loud? Forget that.
-Kymmethy

It took every ounce of self-control for Jessica not to run over and molest her boyfriend for all he was worth.
-Digitally Obsessed

Oh. My. God. A hot guy and I mean a hot guy is molesting me in the men’s bathroom, what do I do? Eep! No you moron you don’t squeak.
-TheOxfordCleric

Look innocent! Look innocent! I’ve done nothing wrong face I’ve done nothing wrong…
-Fadeinonme

Warning: Slash, swearing, and sex. (My three favorite 's' words.)
-Animenut2003

Welcoming him with open arms, with a large helping of smug See How Noble We Are and a nauseating dash of Aren't You Grateful To Us For Befriending You In Your Time Of Need.
-Anna Fugazzi

Where the hell do you get off telling everybody I'm a good guy? Do you have any idea how humiliating it is to have everybody think that I'm some kind of hero?
-CherryCola69

He had not been placed in Slytherin for nothing… conniving… manipulative… sexy… and never to be trusted…
-Crazy Mary-J

Some of his brain cells let out miserable little crying noises before they committed suicide.
-KungFuu

God, what was so interesting about breasts? They were just fat and milk glands- nothing sexy about that.
-Briarrow69

A porcelain piggy started squealing as the blunt side of a hammer was raised in the air just above its china head. Screaming, it begged for forgiveness as it saw its untimely death coming at full speed down. Had it not held your money well enough? Had it served its purpose long enough? Were you unsatisfied with its quality of work? Thousands of questions came from his snout until a resounding crunch of its porcelain skin was crushed open and the internal organs made of currency flowed out on the floor in a wave of silver. No more did that pig cry.
-Selim