Author has written 4 stories for Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Fallen Star Series, Jessica Sorensen, and Mortal Instruments. I read and write Mortal Instruments and Percy Jackson fanfics. I'm literally addicted to reading Mortal Instruments right now. I love when you guys review. It's my favorite thing. SO PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW I am in love with Percy Jackson. I think about what it would be like to date or be him! (sigh) Anyway I have some outfits for my characters if you wanna see them. Anyone else share my feelings? Oh and anyone else in love with Malec? Cutest and funniest couple ever!!! And to see the outfits go to my website and click the Summer trends. Love Crazygirlxx (I'm crazy for y'all) 15 Things to do when your in Walmart! 1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens. 4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" 8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. 10. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" 12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!" 14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" 15.Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!" To Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity: 1. At Lunch Time, Sit in Your Parked Car with Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer at Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You to Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!" 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once everyone has gotten over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With the Prophecy'. 7. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get. 8. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 9. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'. 10. Sing Along At The Opera. 11. Put Mosquito Netting around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day. 12. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache. 13. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream ‘I Won! I Won!' 14. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, yelling 'Run for Your Lives! They're Loose!' 15. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, ‘Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity: Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile. You're just jealous because the voices in my head talk to me and not you. Excuse me. Have you seen my mind? I think I've lost it... I'm not random, you just can't think as fast as me When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world wonder how you did it. "Immature" actually spells "I'm mature" Don't upset me, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies. Don't interupt me when I'm talking to myself. It's rude. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that they're not out to get you. I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them? My friends are the type of people who would try to drown a fish, but I love them anyway. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill themselves, is it considered a hostage situation? If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects...copy this into your profile If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters...copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile. If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile. If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever turned around and questioned how you got on those subjects after an entire conversation, copy and paste this in to your profile. If you think 'morning people' should be driven off the face of the planet so they spread their 6-AM cheer to Martians, copy and paste this to your profile. If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile. If you get way too excited for books, movies, etc. to come out, copy this into your profile If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever wondered why the heck Canadians and Americans have to spell 'colour' differently, and use different units of measurement, copy this to your profile. If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile. If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you've ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile. If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile. If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile. put this 1 out of 6 people are insane. except when you're friends with me and my friends, then 6 out of 6 people are insane. When life gives to lemons, throw them at life and demand BIGGER lemons Reality is more fun when you make it up Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid! Words may hurt me, but sticks and stones will bounce off my force field So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil? I've heard that its possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. Love your enemies. it pisses them off Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to Tell the truth and run When in doubt, say a quote Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures? When in doubt, make up words! Ask no questions and I will tell no lies. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, the rest of our lives they tell us to just sit down and shut up You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not Cold then I'm Hot. I know I'm Hot. Thank You for embracing it! A postitve attitude may not solve all your problems, but it annoys enough people to make it worth it! I'm not insensitive, I just dont care If two wrongs don't make a right, try three Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that. Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss. There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM... Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers. When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them. Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history. What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question...i wonder... What would happen if the whole world farted at once? On a scale of one to awesome, that was purple. "Help! I've fallen and I can't -- Hey! Nice carpet!" I'm not afraid of death. What's it gonna to do? Kill me? Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. Rules are like paperclips. Meant to hold things together, fun to bend, and easy to twist out of shape. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target. The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears it is true. We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police. Eat right, exercise, die anyway. Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible? Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world. "At my lemonade stand I used to give away the first glass for free, and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote." If you can't beat them, confuse them. Reality continues to ruin my life. If everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something. It's you and me against the world - we attack at dawn. Life is just one bad thing after another. Unless it's a bunch of bad things all at once. If you get good grades and still don't know anything at all copy this onto your profile Normal people worry me. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. People say that I have totally lost it. I wasn't even aware I had it. First law of science: don't spit into the wind May your life be like toilet paper - long and useful! theres always a light at the end of a tunnel just pray its not a train! take my advice i dont use it anyway Jealousy is a wasted emotion. Which is why I recycle! What does really suck? A giraffe with pain in his neck Don't be open-minded, your brains might fall out Homework? Do I pay school money to work at home!? Smile and the world smiles with you. Fart and you stand alone When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose There are some that are wise and others that are otherwise You'll never get rid of a bad temper by losing it! Whoever said money can't buy happiness, didn't know where to shop If at first you do not succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left Everybody makes mistakes, thats why they put erasers on pencils The road to success is always under construction By the time you read this, you've already read it Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them Dont steal, the government hates competition The higher you are, the farther you fall... so keep yur job at burger king! How to annoy people WARNING only read this if you wish to lower your life expectancy by a huge amount Accuse people of "glue sniffing addictions" in public. The next time someone says "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me " HIT THEM WITH A DICTIONARY! Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary I didn't fall for you, you tripped me. Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust? Don't follow me, I'm lost too It's always the last place you look. Of course it is; why would I keep looking after I've found it? I'm sick of following my dreams, I'm just gonna ask where their going and hook up with them later Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them Set sail in a general that way dire Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that. I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. If the world is full of crazy people, THEY'D MAKE ME THEIR LEADER. One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubburn to ask for directions. WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff. Have you seen my sanity? I seem to have lost it 364 days of the years kids are told not to take candy from strangers, but on Halloween it's encouraged! Why is that? Things To Ponder: Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? So what's the speed of dark? How come abbreviated is such a long word? A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station.. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"? Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food? Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it? If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches? What disease did cured ham have? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Why do alarm clocks “go off” when they start making noise? Why do we yell “Heads up!” when we should be yelling “Heads down!”? How can something be both “new” and “improved”? Why do we shut up, but quiet down? How did the “Keep Off the Grass” sign get there in the first place? In case you needed proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: 1. Children's Asprin: Warning: Keep Away From Children (So I'm supposed to give it to...?) 2. Staple's letter opener: Caution: Blades are very sharp. Safety goggles recommended (Wait a sec while I grab my safety googles to open this letter) 3. Curling Iron: Warning: Do not use while sleeping (shoot... that's the only time I have to curl my hair!) 4. Candle: Warning: A burning candle is fire (And you thought I didn't know that...?) 5. Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking (Oh, thanks for the warning.) 6. Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado (And against the tornado it would do what...?) 7. Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts (Oh, good to know.) 8. Butcher Knife: Warning: Keep Out of Children (I thought we were supposed to stab them, though...) 9. Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted. (But I though it was instant death...) 10. Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping (But hair coloring tastes so good on Mint Chocolate Chip!) 11. Dial Soap: Warning: Use like regular soap (Oh, good, I thought the soap was radioactive.) 13. Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required (Only some?) 15. On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.) 16. On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?) 17. On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). 18. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." (well... a bit late, huh!) 19. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought??...) 20. On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time)? 21. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) 22. On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because??...) 23. On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) 24. On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious) 25. On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) 26. On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, ooh...fly Delta?) 27. On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) 28. On a Korean kitchen knife-- "Warning: keep out of children." (hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...) 29. On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (Oh my ..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) 30. On a can of tuna-- "Warning: Contains Tuna"(Never would have guessed) The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK,When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism. A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won't re-post it? Re-post this if you truly believe in God, and even if you don't. One day a 6 year old girl was sitting in a classroom. The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children. The teacher asked a little boy. TEACHER: Tommy do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky. TOMMY: Okay.(He returned a few minutes later) Yes, I saw the sky. TEACHER: Did you see God? TOMMY: No. TEACHER: That's my point. We can't see God because he isn't there! He doesn't exist. A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions. The teacher agreed and the little girl asked: LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. LITTLE GIRL: Tommy do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yesses (getting tired of the questions by this time). LITTLE GIRL: Did you see the sky? TOMMY: Yesses LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the teacher? TOMMY: Yes LITTLE GIRL: Do you see her brain? TOMMY: No LITTLE GIRL: Then according to what we were taught today in school, she must not have one! TH15 M355463 53RV35 T0 PR0V3 H0VV 0UR M1ND5 C4N D0 4M4Z1N6 TH1N65! 1MPR3551V3 TH1N65! 1N TH3 B361NN1N6 1T VV45 H4RD BUT N0VV, 0N TH15 L1N3 Y0UR M1ND 1S R34D1N6 1T 4UT0M4T1C4LLY VV1TH0UT 3V3N TH1NK1N6 4B0UT 1T. B3 PR0UD! 0NLY C3RT41N P30PL3 C4N R34D TH15. R3P05T 1F U UND3R5T4ND TH15 M355463 Hi, my name is Amy Bruce. I am 7 years old, and have severe lung cancer. I also have a tumor in my brain, from repeated beatings. Doctors say I will die soon if this isn't fixed, and my family can't pay the bills. The Make A Wish Foundation has agreed to pay 7 cents for every time this message is sent on. For those of you who send this along, I thank you so much, but those of you who don't send it, what goes around comes around. Have a heart. Re-send this, help her. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! PLEASE READ. I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' "OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so thatmommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!'' "I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart Month one Mommy Month Two Mommy Month Three You know what Mommy Month Four Mommy Month Five You went to the doctor today. Month Six I can hear that doctor again. Month Seven Mommy Every Abortion Is Just . . . One more heart that was stopped. If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried post this in your profile I totally approve of anyone who wants to get an abortion but a small part of me still thinks it's wrong. So many little lives--gone. I almost cried when I read this. I just want everyone to know that I don't judge anyone who supports and I don't judge those who are against it I'm CRAZY it's what I love most about myself. Lol. |