Welcome. Grab a cookie. Take a seat. My master is currently busy turning Sues and their makers into delicious cookies for you folks. I do not take interest in his activities, so I am charged with the duty to write and usually review the decent fics that I had the chance, care or liked enough to read. Any food poisoning is not my responsibility. Do not sue me, for I am poor and helpless.

General disclaimer: I do not own the universes my stories are set in. Every character, setting, ideas or whatnot that does not have the sign "OC" in front of it or not explicitly claimed as mine is NOT MINE. And besides, we are writing fanfiction here, people. FAN. Fiction.

I am not a shipper. I like friendship.

I am young and inexperienced, and I am ready to learn.

I actually tried slash once. It's the Fullmetal Alchemist fandom. As soon as it gets to the fifth line, I was forced to shut off the Windows Explorer and sat staring at the carpet, trying to calm my breathing. So I have sworn never to try again, unless it is very, very subtle and well-written. Edit: somewhat gotten over it, although hardcore erotic stuff is till a no-no.

You might say I'm joking about this slash thing, but I am serious. I'm not much of a clown.

However, I do not say that slash-shippers should go die in a hole. Continue writing. Maybe one of these days I will start liking it.

Asian, height unknown, weight unknown, spoke two languages (Vietnamese and English) quite fluently although with a strong accent, my mother tongue being Vietnamese. Been to Russia before. Put a bump on a bully's head with a ping-pong paddle or whatever that was called before. Mostly mellow. Had once or twice been blamed for having an overactive imagination before.

Beta

Special thanks to Spyden, he who is kind enough to be my beta. Like I said, I'm an amateur at English, it not being my first language and all. But that, again, is no excuse to why I wouldn't check my works first before publishing them. They are my duty after all, as an author, to make sure you folks read happy and without difficulties.

Or so everyone just keep telling me.

Stories

I dabble in a number of fandoms, and forgive me, but my plot bunnies often flee before I could get something down properly, which means it might take some time before I finish a story or finish one at all. So roll down and enjoy my creations. I shortened this effin' long profile so you wouldn't have to roll all the way down to them.

Fullmetal Alchemist

An Empty Tin Can's Pain (one-shot)

Crimson Excalibur (chapter-story; on hiatus)

Rewinded Time (chapter-story; in progress)

What Kills the Dog (one-shot)

How to Train Your Dragon

A Dragon Gone Mad (drabble-series; in progress)

A Dragon's Words (one-shot)

Blood and Friendship (one-shot - not recommended. Savvy like hell)

Classification of Higher Dragons (chapter-story; in progress)

Contract of Trust (one-shot)

Pride of the Dragon (chapter-story; on hiatus)

The Nightmare Before Midwinter (chapter-story; in progress)

The Reason He's Sitting on My Back (poem series; in progress)

To Fear (one-shot)

Warped Images (chapter-story, in progress)

We are the Differences (chapter story; complete) WARNING: OC in here. Haven't had a flame yet, but...we shall see.

We are the Differences: Drabbles (self-explanatory; in progress)

You Don't Mess with Dragon Riders (one-shot) It's DONE, people! DONE! Quit putting it on alerts!

Maximum Ride

The Owlman (chapter-story; on hiatus)

Merlin

The Time Book (chapter-story; on hiatus)

Naruto

When the Kids Take Over (one-shot; possibly a chapter-story)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians

Forgotten Hero (OC, one-shot)

The Way Home (chapter-story; in progress)

Hatred Makes the Demigod Walks (OC, one-shot)

Harry Potter

Slipstream (Salazar/Godric friendship, one-shot)

Updating

I am not a usual slowpoke, so if you check one of my stories that had not been updated for a month or more, chances are I'm currently working on another one. Just get this clear: I'm not forcing myself to do anything. I will write and post when I feel like it because frankly, they are my stories. I will post when my update is as good as I wanted it to be and when I was sure that you would enjoy it as well. No use posting something crappy to keep a few impatient people happy.

Enough said.

Reviews

I like people reviewing my works. So I will review yours, too, if it's good enough. Normally, I favorite a story and then leave it there in my fav list for awhile, then some time later bring it up again, reread it and then I review. That's how it usually rolls for me. If you got my review the same time I favorited your story, congratulations, chances are a third of the other people in the fandom would like your work, too.

Although I don't review as often as I usually did and am quite young, you can send me a review request. But if your story sucks, I will say it sucks. If your story is awesome, I'll be generous with my praises. So it is.

Regarding Flames

I would say that half the site had no idea what a "flame" really is. It is, in my opinion, a little review that is written just to a) get your attention because the flamer had no life or was bored or b) just there to annoy you. I personally don't see the point in doing this. What good is it? Waste of time.

Now, understand here that harsh criticisms are not flames, merely a reminder that is designed to get your attention. Before you throw an angry reply at the so-called "flamer", maybe it's wise to look over your work first. Don't act rashly. These people are, by a lot of chances, very intelligent, and they will make you curse yourself for ever sending them a heated reply.

Current Focus

The sequel to We are the Differences caused much more of a bother than I originally thought it would. Pieces of it had already been written and scattered all over the place and I am assembling them. Now that it's summer, I might actually start making some progress on it again.

Until then~

Ending Note

If you want to talk or ask questions, feel free to PM me. I'm not a very social person, but I can get along with almost anyone. Don't worry, I won't bite or flame.

Read and review my stories. Be honest-to-goodness if you so wanted. I don't mind.

Good day,
~the Apprentice