A book is a part of life, a manifestation of life, just as much as a tree or a horse or a star. It obeys its own rhythms, its own laws, whether it be a novel, a play, or a diary. The deep, hidden rhythm of life is always there - that of the pulse, the heartbeat.
-Henry Miller

*Rattles tip jar* BUY ME A COFFEE (copy URL, delete 2 spaces): ko-fi. com/ A700KQS

=Updated=
:Friday - 2:00 PM = October 27th - 2017:

4 CURRENT PROJECTS:

(Book 1) THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: PARADISE CALLING

To see the full-sized cover art for the story, go to

Summary: Link rescues Malon from bandits, but after seven years apart she doesn't recognize him. He escorts her home, only to find that Ingo has taken over and is driving the ranch to ruin. To save his old friend, Link must restore hope to a disheartened Malon and vows to return the ranch to her control. A new take on a familiar tale, this is the story you only thought you knew.

Status: Finishing

Complete: Prologue, Chapters 1-23, Interlude

Writing: Chapter 24, Epilogue

(Book 2) THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: THE DESERT ROSE

To see the full-sized cover art for the story, go to

Summary: Set 10 years before Ocarina of Time, Talon Lon is the son of the palace horsemaster, tasked with maintaining the stables. His life is virtually directionless, until a sultry Gerudo thief turns his world on its head. Now he must strike a balance between helping his ambitious, ailing father and keeping watch over this wild desert beauty that refuses to be tamed.

Status: Ongoing

Complete: Prologue, Chapters 1-2

Writing: Ongoing

A HUNDRED WORDS, A THOUSAND TALES

Summary: Everyone is the Hero of their own stories, and that is no less true for the people of the Kingdom of Hyrule. The following are brief glimpses into their lives with short 100 word vignettes featuring any character from any game. Used as an exercise to stoke my creative fire.

Status: Ongoing

Complete: Chapters 1-11

THE LIVE HOUSE

Summary: Set in modern day Hyrule. Link has returned from the war overseas, his body and spirit battered yet unbroken. Saria, Malon, and Zelda are college students,
each with their own goals and ideals - until they all find themselves unexpectedly brought together by rock ‘n roll and the world of music.
The lights go up, and the next chapter in their lives will ring across the crowded hall.

Status: Ongoing, but not regularly updated

POSSIBLE FUTURE PROJECTS:

ON THE WINDSWEPT RAINS OF SUMMER

Malon/OC yuri romance. AU Zelda, but influenced by OoT

ZELDA/IMPA SKYWARD SWORD (Title Pending)

Small 3 chapter sadfic of the love that develops between Zelda and Impa during the events of Skyward Sword. Implied yuri.

AFTER PARADISE CALLING (Title Pending)

A small 3 chapter fic about what Link goes through after the conclusion of Ocarina of Time, flowing into Majora's Mask.

PARADISE CALLING: THE LOST CHAPTERS

The chapters that had to be cut from the story because they disrupted the flow of the narrative. 3 or 4 chapters.

THE THIRD TIMELINE (Title Pending)

With the Hyrule Historia we learn that the events of Ocarina of Time have fractured the timeline into three separate paths. Set 20 years after the Hero of Time and the Princess of Destiny were slain in the final battle, Malon's daughter discovers a crippled hermit living on the edge of the Lost Woods who teaches her how to shine a light on the darkness.

The Desert Rose Author's Notes:

Prologue I & II Notes:
(Posted February 8th, 2016)

I had this 9k word chapter finished years ago. Then I got hit by a car, my long-term girlfriend left me, life kicked me in the balls, boo-fuckin-hoo yadda yadda... TL:DR, I lost my creative edge for a couple years. I never stopped dreaming up new story ideas, but never found the energy to write them down. This is an effort to fix that.

You have no idea how hard it was not to post it, but I finally got sick and tired of having zero output for you guys, so here it is. Give me your reviews and maybe I can find the inspiration to continue.

Fair warning: This story is going to be a little more adult than Paradise Calling. As in more risque and sexual in nature. I mean come on, it's about a race of scantily clad female warriors from the desert that roam the countryside looking for a good sexing for the sole purpose of procreation. (I'm sorry, I mean that according to the game they “Go into towns to find boyfriends, teehee...”) It will also take a serious look at what an all female culture might look like, so bodily functions and physical descriptions will probably come into play at some point. Female sexuality would likely not be nearly as taboo of a subject in such a society, and even homosexuality could be a common, even celebrated practice. For those of you out there whom this might offend, (I'm looking at you, Bible/Qur'an-thumping uber-zealots) please try to keep an open mind, maintain an adult sense of maturity, and remember that this is a fictional universe. The dirty lesbians can't actually hurt you.

I wanted a prologue that would allow you to take a look at the differences between these two characters before I threw them together. Specifically, what their reactions are when they are forced to take a life, and what happens when someone they love dies. I think the contrast tells you a lot about their personality in the story to come.

EDIT March 6th - Small update in Prologue II for future continuity issues.

Chapter 1 Notes:
(Posted Match 6th, 2016)

Forgot to post his one's author notes. Smallish chapter designed to establish the setting. Next chapter will be a bit longer and introduce adult Talon.

Chapter 2 Notes:

Paradise Calling Author's Notes:

Chapter 1 Notes:
(Posted December 21st, 2011)

I'm still experimenting with my prose some. Ya know, throwing things at the wall, seeing if they stick, taking note on what seems to explode with the most force, that sort of thing, so I apologize if some of it seems long-winded or inconsistent.

Malon's crossbow is based on the Chinese Chu-Ko-Nu design. Look it up, it's very cool for a weapon made two thousand years ago.

This story is rated PG-13 for romance, sexual themes/suggestions, language, violence, and thematic elements. I want to emphasize the language aspect, because for some of these guys swear words get dropped like a clusterbomb payload. You have been warned.

Chapter 2 Notes:
(Posted January 4th, 2012)

My next chapter might be delayed for a bit. I'm starting my college creative writing course next week, and since it's my first time taking such a class I don't know what to expect, so I'm planning on my creative fire being burnt out on schoolwork. I do have chapters 1-4 complete and just have to proofread and edit 6-10, but I had to add chapter 5 in to fix some continuity errors, so I'm busy hammering it out. I feel like I might need to give myself some room though, so please be patient. I don't want to give a time schedule yet because I had a bad habit of not delivering last time I tried to write this thing, so it's best if I not make any promises I can't keep.

Aggravating to a fiction writer: Trying to get across concepts like “swiss cheese” or having to avoid phrases like “spartan furnishings” when the Swiss and Greeks have never existed in these universes. The simple word "toxic" can trace its roots back to Hercules' battle with the Hydra, both of which are legends unique solely to Earth's past. At what point do you ignore the origins of language for the convenience of description?

Chapter 3 Notes:
(Posted January 23rd, 2012)

This story is loosely based on the Ocarina of Time video game. Many events happened as you might remember them, but some things happened different in this story, and will be noted where relevant. I say this because I've gotten some input (not just from reviewers here) that want to educate me on what really happened in OoT. I appreciate all feedback I receive, but believe me when I say that I am probably one of the biggest Zelda fans that you will ever know, and I don't give a flying fig if I'm ignoring certain aspects of the game in order to make this a better story. (Example of something I'm ignoring: Hyrule Field was nice and peaceful after Ganondorf but a death trap before Link grew up. What the hell?)

I find as I'm writing that I write Link and Malon differently, and not just as separate characters. With Link it's a more militant, grounded view, but when I'm writing Malon I find myself using more sensual descriptions. Link sees the world and reacts to it according to his own moral code, but Malon experiences it on a different level, such as when she went swimming in the river. It's an interesting new experience for me, where two characters have come alive and are not just different aspects of my personality. I'm happy to see that my writing is continuing to evolve with time and practice. Still a long way to go though...

I'm suffering from writing overload due to my college classes, so next chapter is postponed until mid-February-ish... maybe. Again, I'm hesitant to give a definitive timetable with this story since I'm fairly poor at following them. Shouldn't have taken four writing intensive classes in my first semester in five years... /wrists

Also, abandoning the specific points of view because it just gets to confusing. Maybe a better write than I could make it work, but I've still got some growing to do. Will experiment further.

Chapter 4 Notes:
(Posted February 3rd, 2012)

Got chapter 5 done earlier than I had expected, so here's chapter 4. Of course, this was at the expense of my college work, but I couldn't stare at quantitative equations for very much longer without wanting to take a beltsander to my eyes.

Don't know what's going on with the profile, it looks fine in the preview. I think it was these "preventative measures" being used that are removing the alignment and lines and such. O_o

Also, as I said at the end of the chapter, I'm interested in reading good Malon-centric fanfiction. If you know of a great story that hasn't been added to the Malink C2, let me know.

Chapter 5 Notes:
(Posted February 18th, 2012)

The Farore's Wind described in this chapter is more closely related to the Super Smash Bros. version than Ocarina's, because in this game it's only really useful for speedruns, i.e. virtually useless.

I had just finished up the last few pages of this chapter when my computer crashed, erasing about 4 hours of work and editing. (/headdesk) I had to go back through the entire thing and try to remember all of the little changes I had made. Still came up about half a page short. Ah well, if it was important I'll find a way to work it in later...

Chapter 6 Notes:
(Posted March 18th, 2012)

Was getting impatient to get this out, so I chopped up a chapter that was getting a bit long. Don't worry, next one will make up for it.

Things that have been preventing me from writing: College, work, stupid plot point I want to work in that conflicts with others, other writing projects, Mass Effect 3, general procrastination... take your pick. I'll try to get the next chapter out by the end of the month though. No promises, as usual.

Also, since the last update I've received over 600 unique user clicks on my story. (Not page clicks, those are in the thousands) Assuming some of those are repeats looking in to see if I've updated, knock it down to about 400 unique users. Since I posted the last chapter I have received only 4 reviews. That's a read/review ratio of about 1%. I'm doing my best to fight my review-wh*re urges, but that's just kinda sad people. =P Be kind to authors, review their stories even if you can only find one nice thing to say. It's what we work so hard for. (Certainly not the money.)

Chapter 7 Notes:
(Posted March 24th, 2012)

Ugh... stayed up late finishing this one. Not a ... pleasant chapter to write, but I believe it had to be done. Poor Malon, her life is so rough. She deserves a Hero...

This chapter is easily double the size that I usually write. I think I should have cut it up into thirds instead of just shaving 2000 words off the top, but whatevs... This should hold you guys over for a couple weeks at least.

No more writing for me for the night. Back to CS:S Zombiemod.

Chapter 8 Notes:
(Posted April 28th, 2012)

Funny chapter to balance out the gloom of the last one. Feed the author! Review the chapter!

Chapter 9 Notes:
(Posted July 06th, 2012)

So yeah... turns out my roommate is bailing on me and I might be homeless in a month. Something about getting married or something, the lazy bastard. My work isn't giving me nearly enough hours to afford the extra $300 a month bump that it would cost to get my own place, so I'm scrambling to find a new job and/or roommate. So writing fan fiction has taken a back seat to ... just about everything. Sorry about that, but that's life.

This chapter has their first real semi-romantic encounter, but also brings up the shadows of possible trouble. Malon has scars when it comes to trusting other people, and she might not have completely forgotten about Link from seven years ago. As you've probably already figured out, this story isn't all lollipops and roses.

The lyrics for Epona's Song were taken from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, Rearranged Album, which as far as I can tell was officially licensed by Nintendo and released in Japan. I think that's about as close to officially canon as you can get. The English translation is kind of silly, so just pretend it's Gerudo or something. I wish the site gave us more freedom with hyperlinks, because then I could have you all listen to it while reading the story.

The legend was originally the creation of someone else on this site that I've long forgotten, but I've expanded upon it to the point that it's nearly unrecognizable from the original. Thanks for the seeds of inspiration, anonymous writer.

Chapter 10 Notes:
(Posted July 13th, 2012)

Bam, 'nother chapter done. Mostly fluff this time, but good fluff I hope. And no, do not expect weekly updates from now on.

Thank you to all the well-wishers. But you know what would make me even more happy/productive? Getting more people to read and review. That'd be aaaawesome.

The “Man on the Stair” poem is a modified version of "Antigonish" by Hughes Mearns, one of my favorite short poems. It is public domain, having been written in 1899.

Interlude Notes:
(Posted July 22th, 2012)

Now updated with the URL to the full-sized cover art on the Prologue and Interlude pages, as well as here in my profile.

Three chapters this month, I'm on a roll. So, we've reached the approximate halfway-point of the story. Still plenty of fluff to get through, but the plot will be picking up from here on out.

Anyone else raging about the new wordcount system? It completely screwed with my 100 word micro stories and I lost about two thousand words on Paradise Calling. I don't know what the difference is, but on this chapter there's a 70 word gap between what OpenOffice and the document manager tell me the word count is. Grrr...

Chapter 11 Notes:
(Posted October 28th, 2012)

Sorry for the super late entry. Homelessness sucks. If you've never lived out of a car, don't complain. =P Had to finish off a wicked plot point that would just not resolve itself, so I finally ended up cutting half the chapter in disgust. It might reappear later in an extras section if I ever get around to it. Should be getting into the groove again now that my situation has settled down a little better, so the next chapter should be out sometime around mid-November. As per usual, no promises.

To my anonymous reviewers: I know I'm awesome. I tell myself that all the time. But one word reviews are like Oreos; the second I see one it makes me all tingly, but ultimately does little for me. What about the story did you enjoy? What worked? What didn't? Did you have any questions that weren't answered? Someone a while back mentioned that they didn't like the part with the photo of Malon's mother. I disagree, since there are plans for that later, but I liked that they actually put some thought into the review. Simple platitudes are nice, so thank you, but they're worth the paper they're printed on.

(Hint: I don't print out my reviews.)

Chapter 12 Notes:
(Posted November 13th, 2012)

I'd forgotten how much fluff I'd had planned for this story. And to think I've already cut three chapters that I couldn't work in...

Next chapter will likely be a little slower coming. Holidays coming up and all that. If I'm not working, going to school, or procrastinating, I'm probably baking. And I do love my baking.

Chapter 13 Notes:
(Posted December 10th, 2012)

I felt that I could take some liberties with the crane. There's certainly enough steampunk-esque contraptions in the later games. Otherwise it would have been 2000 words of describing an insanely complex pulley system. Or maybe flying it up with balloons. That would have been more on par with the series.

And no, Bulblins weren't in Ocarina. But you know what? My story, I needed some grunts that weren't completely mindless. So nyeh.

Chapter 14 Notes:
(Posted December 17th, 2012)

Two chapters in two weeks. Well, one chapter and half of another, originally. The next chapter is going to take a little while to flesh out. But Christmas break is coming up, so I should be able to get a good bit of writing done, assuming I'm not in a sugar coma. I aim for two more chapters by New Year's, but as per my usual, no promises.

And now, back to the sheer awesomeness that is Natural Selection 2...

Chapter 15 Notes:
(Posted July 27th, 2013)

So ... yeah. Turns out I failed two classes in college, and needless to say that even though the government pays for everything, it's not worth losing my GI Bill just to sit around and write fan fiction. So I decided to take a break for a while and concentrate on my schoolwork. 2 jobs / college / health issues / family = less time to write than usual.

Please don't lynch me.

Chapter 16 Notes:
(Posted August 7th, 2013)

PIKMIN. PIKMIN PIKMIN. PIKMIN YO, PIKMIN.

Chapter was running long again so I chopped it in half. Hate me or love me for it, you get another chapter now. I hope you've all been using floss, because the sap just keeps on flowing.

The sap must flooooow... O_O

Chapter 17 Notes:
(Posted August 24th, 2013)

I will only say that I hate the Twilight books even more now because they've stolen all of the good titles. I loathe to even type the words Breaking Dawn because of those abominations. May paedophile vampires and werewolves alike burn in glitter Hell.

I had to sit down and think about the Sun's Song for a while. What exactly happens when Link plays it? What are the limits? Is it making the world spin faster, or somehow affecting the orbit of the sun? No, I decided. It's the Ocarina of Time, so the spell should have a time component, not actually causing the world to rotate 180 degrees in an instant.

Next step. Does it affect the entire world? What if Link kept playing the song? Would it burn one side of the world to a crisp and sentence the other to a frigid, endless night? No, I decided. That would be silly, with people in every country looking outside wondering what the hell was going on. Nothing else the Ocarina could do has nearly that much power, it's far more localized I'm sure.

So it must only affect a small area. There's really nothing to suggest it's only Link that's affected, because then people would be staring at a kid standing stock still for 12 hours straight in the middle of the street. So how large is it? I figure about a kilometer ought to do it. Why does it only go to dawn or dusk? Screw it, make it an even 12 hour jump. Maybe there's a certain phrase you have to play to change the size of the bubble or the amount of time that passes. That would be cool, add some depth if I were to do a full Ocarina of Time novalization sometime in the far distant future...

Of course, then you start getting into the weird stuff. Do people on the outside see the time bubble? What happens if someone tries to cross it? Will they stumble “forward” in time? Or will they be trapped in a 12-hour long nexus as their body phases through the bubble? What if they get stuck half-way? Will the half of their body outside of the bubble burn off calories while the other half remains inert? Will the half of the body inside of the bubble cause a massive buildup of blood-pressure that will cause their heart to explode once the bubble goes down?

At this point I said, “Fuck it all,” and left it to the reader's imagination. Once you start getting into all of the little nuances of time travel it really starts screwing with your sense of reality.

Seriously. Fuck time travel.

Chapter 18 Notes:
(Posted September 1st, 2013)

There were two really ridiculous things regarding the whole Lon Lon Ranch side-quest. The state of the father being the greater of the two. (I'll get to the other one later) Because what father in the world is going to abandon his home and only daughter to her creepy, tyrannical old pseudo-uncle? "Ganondorf drove him out", my ass. He burned Castle Town to the ground and raised its inhabitants as redead, I don't think he'd suddenly show a whole lot of mercy to one random ranch owner.

Chapter 19 Notes:
(Posted September 26th, 2013)

Hey, England. Australia's kicking your teeth in on pageviews. Are you going to let those dirty, piss-water swilling convicts kick your ass?

I'm never updating on Sundays again. I got half the usual page views and less than half the average reviews. =/ y u no leik 8k word plot chapterz?

Something amusing, at least for me: In my original draft of this story, this was chapter 11, about 30k words in. It's now chapter 21 at the 100k mark. It's interesting how a story can grow over time. I guess that's what happens when it has 10 years to gestate.

Also, *party whistle* 100k words, baby!

Chapter 20 Notes:
(Posted March 14th, 2016)

3 years later... *cough* _

I am sooo sorry. @_@

Chapter 21 Notes:
(Posted April 10th, 2016)

In which Malon gets drunk and takes advantage of Link.

Chapter 22 Notes:
(Posted October 15th, 2017)

*Wakes from eons-long slumber*

I wanted to leave the exact events of what happened up to the reader's imagination. I believe that writing a romance can be sensual without turning into smut. I think I managed to strike the balance, but I'll leave it up to my readers to judge.

*Goes back to sleep*

Chapter 23 Notes:
(Posted October 20th, 2017)

I'm mother-effing Santa Clause, ya'll. Two chapters in less than a week. We're rolling until the end, this train stops for nobody.

The end of this chapter is a cliffhanger, but not really. You know how it's going to end. But I hope to surprise you a bit with where it goes from there.

Chapter 24 Notes:
(Posted October 25th, 2017)

I went back and made some very minor changes to the previous chapter to keep continuity. Because apparently I'm terrible at it if I don't spend 6 months agonizing over every little detail.

Also, I lied. The chapter was hitting 12k words, so I split it up. One more to go, followed by the epilogue!

Chapter 25 Notes:
(Posted October 27th, 2017)

Epilogue and final notes to follow. I can't believe this thing is finally done.

The Live House Author's Notes:

First off: This will not be updated regularly. And considering how spotty my usual updating schedule is like, that should tell you something.

What's this then? This is a story that was floating around on my hard disk for a while, and it came roaring back when I discovered a new band. Let's just say it sparked a creative rush that burned out after the first 15k words.

This story is going to be extremely* realistic. As in, no magic, no co-existing species, no golden almighty power, no prophecies, nada. Think Alternate Earth, like the Ace Combat games. If I have one regret, it's that I can't find a sensible way to make the "eternal conflict and rebirth" thing work in this story and turn it into a proper Zelda title without going into full-on cheese mode.
(* To the point that a group of random people could realistically expect these sorts of things to happen to them...)

Castleton is modeled – roughly – after Seattle, Washington. Since I haven't lived there in over a decade, there's going to be quite a few creative liberties taken.