Hello, peoples! I go by distraught.hallelujah. I don't give out any personal information, so please don't ask.

The username, in case you're wondering, is from a song I once wrote. I tend to write songs a lot, and one of my songs had the line 'Singing distraught hallelujah' in it. Plus, all the other good usernames were already taken, so here I am. :P

UPDATE: The stories I have published on here are from many years ago and I'd like to think I've improved since. To see some of my newer/best works, FIND ME ON INKITT, same username. I may be continuing Dear Diary there at some point as well, I've not yet decided if I'll continue it here as well or just move what's worth moving over there. :p

Uchiha Itachi Facts (the Chuck Norris of Naruto)

Uchiha Itachi doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.

Uchiha Itachi doesn't actually write haiku, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

When Uchiha Itachi goes out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

Uchiha Itachi does not sleep, he waits.

Uchiha Itachi does not shower. He only takes blood baths.

Uchiha Itachi can divide by zero.

In the medical community, death is referred to as "Uchiha Itachi Disease"

Uchiha Itachi crossed a road. No one dared question his motives.

Lightning never strikes in the same place twice because Uchiha Itachi is looking for it.

The universe is expanding because it's running away from Uchiha Itachi.