Note: My account is now inactive, I will not be updating any of my old fics or uploading any new ones. Thanks to everyone for all the reviews and favourites and follows,I really appreciate them.

Basic Stuff About Me:

I love the Edge Chronicles, Avatar, Rent (the movie/musical), Lemon Demon, Doctor Who and writing stuff. I play the flute, piano and have just started the oboe. I LOVE Quint from the Edge Chronicles and wish I could become Maris (only without the bad stuff) so as to live on the Edge and in Sanctaphrax and so that I could be with Quint! I am a feminist and believe in human rights and environmental issues. Thanks for reading and I hope that you will review my stories (no spam intended) so I can improve! I enjoy randomly pasting things that are funny/entertaining from other people's profiles so if you do have something like that on your profile; I'm watching you! :P

Pairings I LOVE:

Sherlock/John (Sherlock) (My OTP)

Lily/James (Harry Potter) (Sorry, Lily/Snape shippers, but she did marry him. And no matter what you say, Snape was still a total jerk)

Amy/Rory (Doctor Who)

Naomi/Emily (Skins)

11/TARDIS (Doctor Who)

Willow/Oz (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) (Tara's really nice, I just don't think Willow and her have good chemistry. Love the character, though)

Luna/Neville (Harry Potter)

Spike/Dawn (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) (you may find this a little creepy, but maybe in a few years... their relationship is so cute!)

Maris/Quint (Edge Chronicles)

Jal/Chris (Skins)

Mark/Anyone-who-is-nice-and-won't-hurt-him (RENT)

Norm/Trudy (Avatar) (I like to pretend the original script happened.)

THINGS I AM NOT ALLOWED TO DO AT HOGWARTS

1. bring a Magic 8 ball to Divination

2. feed first years to Fluffy

3. bring the Giant Squid to the Yule Ball

4. sing "We're Off to See the Wizard" when sent to Dumbledore's office

5. draw the Dark Mark on sleeping classmates

6. imitate Steve Irwin in Care of Magical Creatures

7. grow weed as "extra credit for Herbology"

8. sell tickets into the Chamber of Secrets

9.refer to either the Weasley or Patil twins as bookends

10.replace library books with books from Silver Ravenwolf

11. say that I must weigh as much as a duck, seeing as I'm a witch

12. ask where such a fat duck could be found

13. give Remus a flea collar

14. tell non-Muggle students that the reason the metric system is all in tens is because muggles can't count higher than that

15. ask when we will be making Love Potion #9

16. give the Slytherins parmesean cheese, then when asked why say "It's their official cheese"

17. sweep the Common Room with Harry's Firebolt

18. call Flitwick "Yoda"

19. distribute wand safety pamphlets citing Berlinda the Buttless

20. use crucifixes to ward off Slytherins

21. sit on Dumbledore's lap in the middle of June and demand presents from "dear old Santa"

22. slip Head and Shoulders into Prof. Snape's inbox

23. call Dumbledore "Gandalf"

24. threaten Rita Skeeter with Raid

25. put ink on my owl's feet, have it walk across my parchment, and then sell the product as a cheat sheet for Ancient Runes

26. tell first-years that the houses are the Morons, the Borons, the Smart-asses and the Junior Death Eaters

27. insult Snape and then accuse him of tipping Veritaserum into my pumpkin juice

28. convince Draco that his patronus must be a ferret

29. cite The Hobbit as a prequel to Hogwarts, A History

30. wear bathrobes to school

31. ask Harry Potter "Who died and made you queen?"

32. tell Moody that since there are only three unforgivable curses, all others are pretty much forgivable

33. act surprised when Moody takes the above as an invitation to curse my ears off

34. give McGonnagall catnip for her birthday

35. refer to Quidditch as Calvinball, citing the score as Q to Twelvish

36. tell Umbridge she's a bad mamma jamma

37. shout "Abracadabra", then fling my wand down and scream "It's not working!"

38. trade first years to other houses because they irritate me

39. use the word "yaoi" as a spell to prevent attraction to the opposite sex

40. claim that the above is anything other than disgusting and wrong

41. point out that actually, Prof. Lupin does get that time of the month

42. offer to set Umbridge up with Trevor the Toad

43.take Polyjuice Potion, go up to the person I am impersonating, punch them, and kiss their girlfriend

44. take the Giant Squid to the Yule Ball

45. use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore"

46. scream that Seamus Finnegan is "after me Lucky Charms"

47. put black circles over Harry's lenses and tell him he has gone blind. Do NOT do it, no matter how funny it could get

48. tell Professor Lupin that my patronous is a dalek.

49. ask the arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is

50. say that resemblances between Dementors and the Nazghul is anything more than coincedental

51. hand out cheat tests saying that the answer to every question on the O.W.L. tests is "42"

52. hand out Gryffindor Courage in bottles labelled "Firewhisky"

53. use the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the human anatomy, even for entertainment purposes

54. impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class

55. wear novelty or holiday themed ties with my school uniform

56. refer to DADA professors as "canaries in the coal mine."

57. put books of muggle fairy tales in the history section of the library

58. refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

59. tell Professor Trelawney that I foresaw her death

60. call the Ghostbusters to Hogwarts

61. when asked in class what the Avada Kedavra curse does, yell "It does DEATH!" This may be correct, but it is not that manner in which one should answer

62. put a sign up on the Ravenclaw noticeboards saying "The library is closed for an indefinite time period." It is not amusing.

63. use silencing charms on my Professors

64. claim that my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos"

65. when being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce "These are not the droids you are looking for"

66. say Albus Dumbledore is my personal Jesus

67. negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort

68. follow potions instructions in reverse order just to see what happens

69. introduce Peeves to paintballing

70. lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and take bets on who will come out alive

71. give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they are real animals

72. teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks

73. sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff vs. Slytherin Quidditch matches

74. douse Harry Potter's invisibility cloak in lemon juice to see if he will become visible

75. charm the suits of armour to do a rendition of "Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas feast

76. make a lightsaber sound with my wand

77. try and start Naked Thursdays in the Common Room

78. steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways

79. sing "Mission Impossible" while doing this

80. scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book

81. "To conguer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice

82. demand the Whomping Willow is just an Entwife who needs some love

83. tell Sir Cadogan that the Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel and then have students yell "Ni" from various directions

84. tell first years that there is a playground in the Forbidden Forest

85. tell Snape to go to his 'happy place'

86. convince first years that the new password to Gryffindor tower is 'Petrificus Totalus' and must be said with their wands pointed at themselves

87. tell Professor Trelawney that my teacup says she's lying

88. The Forbidden Forest is forbidden because it contains werewolves and acromantula, not because there is a secret cave with the answers to every test in it. I should refrain from telling first years that there is.

89. continuously tell first years about the time the Hogwarts Christmas tree ate a student

90. throw Hermione's Hogwarts: A History out the window and then claim that it wanted freedom

91. take a hippogriff to the Summer Olympics to get an unfair advantage at the Equestrian competitions

92. say "There you are, Trevor! Neville has been looking all over for you!" when I see Professor Umbridge.

93. Quidditch is an outside sport, no matter how large the Great Hall is

94. sing "Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead" at any time.

95. suggest "Springtime for Voldemort" as the class play

96. if Lupin should suggest something, refuse by replying "Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin!"

97. celebrate Easter in Hogwarts by releasing hordes of pink rabbits and making the first years chase them

98. I am not God. Professor Dumbledore is not God. Despite being near-omniscient, Professor McGonagall is not God. Neither is Harry Potter.

99. sing something from The Phantom of the Opera, should I see a Death Eater wearing a white mask

100. ask Sirius if he was neutered

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you cuold raed taht, psate it in yuor prfiloe :D

Quotes

Remember there's a light at the end of every tunnel, just make sure its not a train.

The next time someone says "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me " HIT THEM WITH A DICTIONARY!

I'm the girl who will burst out laughing in a dead silent room because of something that happened yesterday!

"If life gives you lemons, make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it!"

I didn't fall for you, you tripped me.

Love? I'd rather fall in chocolate.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Who gives a sh*t about Edward Cullen and Bella when you can watch James head get ripped off.

The English are not very spiritual people, so they created cricket to give them some sense of eternity.

Harry Potter Characters!

Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hogwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.

Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.

George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.

Oliver Wood... has heard every single joke possible about his name. No, that is not a challenge.

Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.

James Potter … doesn’t believe her.

Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.

Sirius Black … Escaped Azkaban, evaded Dementors, outwitted Ministry, killed by drapery.

Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.

Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane.

Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.

Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’.

Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence.

Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.

Copy this to your profile if you ever pushed the door that said pull.

If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, NarnianFairypirateatwilight, Storms-Are-My-Nature, ShadowRose18, UnaOnimousIsAwesome, MarisPallitax

If you would love to stay a night in a library, copy and paste this on your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile Yah! It's my favourite hobby, and also a good way to write stories.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile I've done this with all of the books in the Quint series of the Edge Chronicles!

If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile

If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love the rain, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you're one of those people who gets excited when they get a new review, copy and paste this in your profile. (AHEM! hint hint)

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile. (I'm not actually American, but yes, I do this!)

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

Australia is often said to be the most racist country. If you think this is a stupid stereotype, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

If you like well-written Original Characters but hate Mary Sues, copy this into your profile, and add your name to the list: Arktos, Random Little Writer, 1angelette, M. Shattermirror, UnaOnimousIsAwesome, MarisPallitax

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST be WEAK.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I live in the COUNTRY, so I MUST live on a farm.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenience store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth or Emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be f*cking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly...or crazy.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER, so I must do weed and steal stuff.
I'm a PUNK, so I must only wear black and date only other punks.
I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.
I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED, so I must be screwed up.
I'm a FEMALE, so I MUST not SWEAR.
I'm MUSLIM, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm MORMON, so I MUST be perfect.
I'm WHITE and have black friends, so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH, so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN, so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a sissy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOUR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE, so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN, so I MUST ride a horse.
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist.
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME, so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. (I would be, but I can't find Matt Smith and Arthur Darvill :P)
I WATCH PORN, so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD, so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN, so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH, so I MUST love sheep.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE. (I only like good Remus/Sirius)
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT... then I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH, so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED. (Do I even look like people?)
I DON'T SWEAR, so I MUST be an outcast.
I wear BLACK nail polish, so I MUST be EMO, GOTH, or PUNK.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG, so I MUST be stupid.
I'm AUSTRALIAN, so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos. (For god's sake, we're not all Steve Irwin!)
I'm AUSTRALIAN, so I MUST be really racist.
I’m GAY, so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN, so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I am an HONOR STUDENT, so I MUST be a NERD.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp. (Only if I think about getting injections or stuff like that)
I can't help pointing out mistakes, so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST, so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life, so I MUST be having problems.
I am a BRUNETTE, so I MUST think all blondes are STUPID
I have RED HAIR, so I MUST have GREEN eyes and FRECKLES
I have BLACK HAIR, so I MUST not be WHITE.
I am BLACK, so I MUST want you to try and avoid saying that WORD in my presence.
I believe in COMPLIMENTING people, so I MUST be a KISS-ASS.
I EAT slowly, so I MUST believe that fast eaters are killing their DIGESTIVE SYSTEMS.
I've read TWILIGHT, so I MUST be a crazily obsessed FANGIRL. (I didn't actually like it...)
I can eat FIVE SLICES of pizza in one sitting, so I MUST be FAT.
I like SLEEPING IN, so I MUST be a lazy TEENAGER.
I don't like POP, so I MUST not be NORMAL.
I am careful about my NUT ALLERGY, so I MUST think all candy has NUTS in it.
I have ASTHMA, so I MUST not play sports.
I am a girl and play SOCCER/FOOTBALL/HOCKEY, so I MUST be trying to get guys ATTENTION.
I don't like ROLLERCOASTERS, so I MUST be OLD, WIMPY, or STUPID.
I like SHOPPING, so I MUST be a GIGGLING GIRLY-GIRL.
I am HONEST, so I MUST be MEAN.
I am a MENNONITE, so I MUST never have heard of a TELEVISION.
I don't have FACEBOOK, so I MUST have no LIFE.
I am a girl and I don't like SHOPPING, so I MUST be either ANTISOCIAL or GAY.
I do WELL in school, so I MUST LOVE it.
I have clothes from WALMART, so I MUST not care about CHILD LABOUR.
I don't like SILENCE, so I MUST fill every one with CHATTER.
I like SINGING, so I MUST belong to a CHOIR.
I don't like DANCING, so I MUST be ANTISOCIAL.
I am an INUIT, so I MUST live in an IGLOO.
I am CANADIAN, so I MUST say 'EH'.
I listen to my IPOD, so I MUST not care about the people AROUND me.
I am part of the POLICE FORCE, so I MUST break all SPEED LIMITS.
I am FRENCH, so I MUST have a little MOUSTACHE and a BERET.
I am INDIAN, so I MUST speak English with an incomprehensible ACCENT.
I can’t just EXCERSISE without a purpose, so I MUST have no MOTIVATION.
I am a man with LONG HAIR, so I MUST be a HIPPY.
I am a woman with SHORT HAIR, so I MUST be a CAREER WOMAN.
I am a GIRL, so I MUST not like MATH.
I am a BOY, so I MUST like GYM.
I have ACNE problems, so I must not care about my personal HYGENE.
I own an SUV, so I MUST not care about the ENVIRONMENT.
I write POETRY, so I MUST be CRAZY.

Fill in character #5 first- makes it easier

No character should be listed twice

You must answer the question, even if you are disgusted.

Delete the previous person's answers, fill in your own, and copy into your profile

Name of book/movie/TV show: Doctor Who

1. Female Character: Amy

2. Another Female Character: Rose

3. Character with gender opposite yours: RORY!

4. Another character with gender opposite yours: Jack

5. Favourite character: 11th Doctor

6. Male character: Micky

7. Character with your gender: River Song

8. Another male character: Ricky

9. Another character with your gender: Donna

10. Any other character: 4th Doctor

Now answer these questions:

1. Have you read a 5/10 fic before?

11/4? That would be sooo weird...

you think 3 is hot? How Hot?

Rory? Very.

3.What would happen if 6 got 1 pregnant?

Micky get Amy pregnant?! Poor Rory!

you recall any good fics about nine?

I don't really read many fics about Donna... I like her, but I've never been too interested in her.

5.Would 7 and 2 make a good couple?

River Song and Rose?! The only thing they have in common is their hair colour and love for the Doctor.

6. 4/8 or 4/9?

Jack/Ricky or Jack/Donna? Well, Donna sure would be happy, and Jack/Ricky? Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised...

7.What would happen if 7 discovered 3 and 8 in a secret relationship?

River Song discovered Rory and Ricky in a secret relationship? ... O_o I don't think she'd care too much, though she may be surprised for Amy.

8.Make summary of at least 20 words for a 6/2 fic.

Micky had always loved Rose. Rose had always been in love with the Doctor. What happened when she was trapped in a parallel universe with only Micky to comfort her?

there such a thing as a 4/10 romance story?

Nope, no such thing as a Jack/4 story. Wrong timeline. Though, once again, knowing Jack I wouldn't be surprised.

10. Suggest a title for a 1/5 hurt/comfort fic.

"The Girl Who Waited," an Amy/11 hurt/comfort fanfic. Probably exists, come to think of it!

11.What kind of plot would you use if 4 wanted 1?

Well, 11 runs into Jack on another planet, introducing Amy to him (during the time when Rory was forgotten). Jack notices an extreme similarity between her and another woman he loved...

12. Does anyone on your friends list read 7 and 9 slash?

River Song and Donna? Hell no!

13.If you wrote a songfic for number ten, what song would you use?

"Parade of the Jelly Babies." Enough said.

Name of book/movie/TV show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer

1. Female Character: Buffy

2. Another Female Character: Tara

3. Character with gender opposite yours: Xander

4. Another character with gender opposite yours: Angel

5. Favourite character: Spike

6. Male character: Oz

7. Character with your gender: Dawn

8. Another male character: Giles

9. Another character with your gender: Anya

10. Any other character: Willow

Now answer these questions:

1. Have you read a 5/10 fic before?

Spike/Willow? Now I'm really REALLY scared. Of course I haven't read one!

you think 3 is hot? How Hot?

Xander? Moderately. Not extremely, though. Spike and Oz are hotter.

3.What would happen if 6 got 1 pregnant?

Oz got Buffy pregnant?!?! Wouldn't happen.

you recall any good fics about 9?

I don't really read Anya fics, sorry.

5.Would 7 and 2 make a good couple?

Dawn and Tara? Possibly... but the main problems are Dawn's underage and when she isn't, Tara'd be dead. They did get along well, though.

6. 4/8 or 4/9?

Angel/Giles or Angel/Anya? Seeing as Angel killed the woman Giles loved, I don't think that would work. I'm pretty sure Angel hasn't met Anya, but this is still more likely.

7.What would happen if 7 discovered 3 and 8 in a secret relationship?

Dawn discovered Xander and Giles in a secret relationship? WTF man! I'm sure she would be very shocked. Especially seeing as she's underage, that would be mentally scarring.

8.Make summary of at least 20 words for a 6/2 fic.

A werewolf and a witch, but not the one you think. After Willow's obsession with magick, she searches for the one who could help Willow, but finds a comfort in him that she wants. AU Oz/Tara

there such a thing as a 4/10 romance story?

Angel/Willow, probably, but I never want to read it.

10. Suggest a title for a 1/5 hurt/comfort fic.

"Champion." Spike sees Buffy grieving his death and anonymously helps her through it without her knowing.

11.What kind of plot would you use if 4 wanted 1?

Angel wanted Buffy. Uh, the actual episodes?

12. Does anyone on your friends list read 7 and 9 slash?

Dawn/Anya slash? No, thankfully, not.

13.If you wrote a songfic for number ten, what song would you use?

Willow? "Lithium," by Evanescence. It'd be about her fighting between her love for Tara and her addiction to magick.

14. (1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (8) and a brief unhappy affair with (6), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3). While (2) ate candy and watched it all like a movie, (10) and (9) on her arm.

Buffy and Dawn are in a happy relationship until Dawn runs off with Angel. Buffy, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Giles and a brief unhappy affair with Oz, then follows the wise advice of Spike and finds true love with Xander. While Tara ate candy and watched it all like a movie, Willow and Anya on her arm.

Incest. Spike telling Buffy to go with Xander. Dawn and Angel. Buffy and Giles. WTF!?! Scared now... O_o The only canon thing in that is Willow/Tara.

This is the oath of a TRUE FRIEND!

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much Worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

9. This is my oath... I pledge it to the end. 'Why?' you may ask;
'because you are my friend'.

IN CASE YOU NEED FURTHER PROOF THAT THE HUMAN RACE IS DOOMED BECAUSE OF STUPIDITY, HERE ARE SOME ACTUAL LABEL INSTRUCTIONS ON CONSUMER GOODS:

On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping". Damn, my plans are foiled!

On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. The shoplifter special?

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap".

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost".

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down". Too late.

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating". Yeah, otherwise you've got a screwed up microwave/oven.

On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body".

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication". Yes, because kids can drive...

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness". I should bloody well hope so! Or I get my money back!

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only". Please, someone tell me the alternative!

On a Japanese food processor:"Not to be used for the other use". They can't tell us because that would give us ideas...

On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts". Good to know it's not artificial.

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals". Why would you even try that?!

On a package of pasta after the cooking insturctions: "Put on fork and eat."

On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". Could be worse; like "artificial artificial bacon bits."

A girl and a boy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down I' scared!

Guy: No, this is fun

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you. Now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug.

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself. It's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building due to break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that half way down the road, the guy knew his break wasn't working, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her give him a big hug and tell him one last time she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live even if he died. Now that is a true man. One that would give his life, for the woman he truly loves.

Copy and Paste if you are, or are looking for a guy like that.

Favourite FanFic Quotes:

"I swear, I think the Healer's switched me and some pureblood baby at birth. Just think, somewhere in this castle, there's a Slytherin Muggleborn that's going thru an identity crisis." - Sirius Black in Dried Lilies by Kait Hobbit

"Are you fucking serious?" "No… it would be a bit disturbing if I was." "…Gross!" - 101 Responses to 'Go Out With Me Evans' by Dudette13

Crashing [the motorbike] into the insane ward of a nearby Muggle hospital. (We only just got away with that one. Pled temporary insanity. Dumbledore vouched for us. 'Course, it helped that the sole witness said we were two kumquats riding a cooked carrot. You have to love muggles...) - The Beast by .o.O.o.Maraudette.o.O.o.

"Run away!" Sirius yelled, jumping to his feet and pulling James with him. "To the Super-Secret Fort Of Awesome!"
"We have a Super-Secret Fort of Awesome?" James asked. Sirius paused.
"I believe my plan my have some kinks to be worked out," he said. "But we should still run away!" - Oh No You Didn't by Loslote

My list of people I've stolen stuff off (THANKS GUYS! Kind of my version of a disclaimer); Anti-pookie, UnaOnimousIsAwesome, gloomy-pearlz, Susly, Cliodhna

Thanks!