Hi!

Story Statuses:

Dean Distracted:Harry Potter: the sequal to "Surprises at Midnight" Hiatus for now. When I'm done with A New Identity, I'll maybe finish it.

A New Identity: Harry Potter: //In Progress/Hiatus// This takes place after the Deathly Hallows. Ginny and baby James are at the store and there is an accident, resulting in Ginny losing her memory. She thinks she is still in school and doesn't know of the events in the second half of the 7th book-- Not even that she is married to Harry, or that a lot of people...including another certain redhead ...are dead. Chaos for Ginny!

Surprises at Midnight: Harry Potter://Complete// Lavender Brown is the main character. In my world, she had a crush on Oliver Wood and Dean Thomas was one of her best friends. (Not as close as Parvati, or any of her other girl friends, but you get the idea.) At midnight on New Years Eve, Dean kisses her. A few minutes later, she overhears Oliver talking to his friends, and he says something that rips her heart out. What to do! What to do!

Bella's Revenge: Harry Potter: //Complete// The summery kind of explains it all.

Dirty Little Secret: Twilight: //Oneshot// Summery explains it. Songfic

Breaking the Habit: Avatar The Last Airbender://Oneshot// A songfic that takes place after Sozen's Comet. Zuko/Aang/Katara love triangle. Zuko and Aang get into a huge fight (with bending involved) over Katara. In the midst of it all, Katara gets hurt. Seeing her burns, Aang becomes so enraged that he slips into the Avatar State, almost killing Zuko. This fic is the two of them reflecting on their actions. Aang deals with his Avatar State problems. Zuko deals with his temper. (Don't worry, they actually do something about it in the end. The whole fic isn't just thoughts)

New Fears: Avatar The Last Airbender: //Oneshot// Takes place before Sozen's Comet, soon after Zuko joins the group. Toph's been acting very jumpy. Everyone's worried. One night, Sokka hears Toph murmur Zuko's name in her sleep. Was she dreaming about Zuko? (Not what you think!)

Broken: Twilight: //Complete// This all happens before Bella comes to Forks. Emmett and Edward are hunting, and Emmett stumbles across a boy, who was mauled by a bear. This boy is actually Emmett's little brother, from his human family. Emmett is broken... :'( Two-shot

You know you're a 90's kid if:

You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
When everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better inky binky bonky daddy had a donkey.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.
"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
You remember those Where's Waldo books.
You remember eating Warheads.
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.
You remember Ring Pops.
You remember drinking Surge and Tang.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.
. . . Furbies
And Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
Michael Jordan was a king.
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.
You collected those Beanie Babies.
The old dollar bills.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
You remember a time before the WB.
You collected all the Troll dolls.
If you even know what an original walkman is.
You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!
You remember Highlight's magazine.
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .
Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .
Before Spongebob . . .
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.
You did MASH to figure out your future

Way back.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!
Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . .
or if you smiled at one of these things

Copy and paste stuff!!

If you promise to review every fic you read, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever ran into a wall, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile. (ALL THE TIME!)

if you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP sign copy this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles just to look for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006 just because it was 'too small' and 'off its orbit' for a couple scientists' likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy this onto your profile. (LONG LIVE PLUTO!)

If your not sure whether to say "Onto your profile" or "Into your profile", copy and paste this on/into your profile.

If you think rapping should be categorized as "rhythmic poetry" instead of "music", copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you noticed that Jasper wouldn't be able to be in the ballet studio in Twilight because if he flipped out over a paper cut then he would definitely flip out when Bella was bleeding like crazy with the gushing leg and stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you believe music causes suicide, copy and paste this onto your profile. (Not that I dislike music...)

If you think Will Turner and Elizabeth Swan are made for each other and that, no matter how awesomely awesome Jack Sparrow may be, he should never ever, under any circumstances, be with Elizabeth, copy and paste this onto your profile.

The best comebacks:

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together
Woman: Really, I'd put F and U together

Funny scene in the movie Holes

Mr. Sir: What are we going to do?

Warden: You'll do as I say.(walks away)

Pendansky: What did she say?

Mr. Sir: Nothin' much.

Pendansky: Well, what do we do?

Mr. Sir: You'll do as I say. (walks away)

Pendansky: But you didn't say anything either...

Funny scene in the movie The Outsiders

Steve: (examining a wound on his mouth) What do you think, man? You think it makes me look tough?

Sodapop: I think it makes you look...different.

Steve: What do you mean "different"?

Sodapop: Well...you got a hole in your mouth.

Funny Scene in an episode of Avatar: The Last Airbender

Villager: Aunt Wu reads from the clouds whether or not our village will be destroyed by the volcano.

Aang: Hey, that cloud looks like a fluffy bunny!

Villager: You'd better hope that's not it. The fluffy bunny cloud symbolizes death and destruction.

Sokka: Do you even hear yourself?

My Favorite Quotes:

Edward = Cedric, Voldemort Cedric, Harry Voldemort; Therefore, Harry Edward (but I didn't need all that math to know that)

To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world --A fortune cookie

I'm eatable, but that is called cannibalism, my children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.--Willy Wonka, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

The Titanic- the unsinkable ship that sank

We just need to borrow your soul for a couple hours. It's perfectly safe really. Your body will just slip into a coma and as long as we get your soul back in time, you'll be fine. Just a little headache, that's all. So (nudge), whaddya say?"--Paige, Charmed.

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I'm the kind of person who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

"Do these sunglasses make my head look fat?" "No, your fat head makes your head look fat." --Joe/Nick, JONAS

"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one." --Bill Gates

I didn't hit you. I gave your face a high five...

"Hey Timon, ever wonder what those sparkly dot are up there?" "They're fireflies. Fireflies that got stuck up in that big bluish-black thing." --Pumbaa/Timon, The Lion King

"Edward's only human, Bella. He's going to react like any other boy." — Angela, Eclipse

"You're the one ripping people off! Three bucks for a bottle of water?! That's cheating." "That's America!" --Jackson/Rico, Hannah Montana

"Stop moving, both of you. This is Devil's Snare. You have to relax. If you don't, it will only kill you faster." "Kill us faster?! Oh, now I can relax!"-- Hermione/Ron, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

"Hi, I'm Miley. Now I'm Hannah. Now I'm Miley. I'm a real girl. I'm a POPSTAR! Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days...except for me because I'm PERFECT!!" --Jackson, Hannah Montana

Ur mom looks like Voldemort...Dissed

"You want to be a good person? Then go in there and make that little boy cry!"--Drake, Drake and Josh

You can't buy happiness, but you can buy ice-cream, which is kind of the same thing.

People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

I find "good morning" a contradiction of terms.

I hate the phrase "It’s always in the last place you look". Well of course it is! Why the heck would I keep looking after I found it!

When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures?

Girl: "Joe, why are you so cute?" Joe Jonas: "You know, I ask myself that everyday."

Josh: What kind of a twisted person are you? Drake: Does it really matter "what kind"? --Drake and Josh

"This is tied for the most terrifying day of my life." "Tied with what?" "Every other freaking day of my life!"--Shaggy/Velma, Scooby Doo 2, Monsters Unleashed

If everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something.

If the United States is supposed to be "united", why is it divided into Democrats and Republicans?

"It's the thought that counts. I ought to know." — Edward Cullen, Eclipse

"I may be an idiot, but I'm not stupid." --Spencer, iCarly

"That thing on your neck, is that your ear?" --Norm (to Mr. Crocker), The Fairly Odd Parents

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

"Buddy, you have to wear clothes to work--there's like a law or something." --Steve, The Outsiders

"I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades...or a game of fake heart attacks. " --Demetri Martin

Never stand between a dog and a hydrant.

When French people swear, do they say, "Pardon my English"?

When they put 'unknown' at the end of a quote, that means they probably don't know how to spell anonymous.--unknown :P

Never say to Harry Potter, "Hey, you've got something on your forehead."

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Before you judge a person, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, it doesn't matter. You're a mile away from him and you got his shoes!

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life!

Isn't it funny how parents spend the first half of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up?

"Attention everyone! Buster's parents are divorced! Assemble at once for a group hug!" --Mr. Haney, Arthur

I hate when people point to their wrist asking for the time...I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point to my crotch and ask where the toilet is?

For all you Avatar fans: Toph's Best Moments:

Toph: We can take em. Three on three!

Sokka: Actually, Toph, there's four of us.

Toph: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't count you; you know, no bending and all.

Sokka: I can still fight!

Toph: Okay. Three on three, plus Sokka.

Toph: THERE IT IS!!

(Everyone looks around and sees nothing)

Toph: That's what it will sound like when one of you spots it. (Waves hand in front of face)

Katara: You got something against libraries?

Toph: I've held books before and I gotta tell you...they don't exactly do it for me.

Sokka: Hey, I thought designing the lost Appa posters was my job! I've been working all day on my Appa.(Holds up drawing of Appa)

(Aang and Katara criticize it)

Toph: It looks just like him to me!

Sokka: Thank you, I worked really...why do you feel the need to do that?

Toph: It feels like an avalanche, but also not an avalanche.

Sokka: Your powers of perception are frightening.

(That was more of a Sokka moment, but whatever...)

Stupid Labels

On a Myer hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping."
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down".
(Too Late!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating".
(No Kidding!)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after
taking this medication."
(Yeah, cause all 5 year olds drive cars.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause
drowsiness."
(I would hope so)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(As opposed to...what?)

On packet of Nobbys' Peanuts:-
"Warning: contains nuts."
(Oh really?)

On a child's Superman costume --"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I blame the parents on this one)

Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "How are you doing in there, Buddy?"

2) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.

3) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then lean over to them and whisper: "I have new socks on."

4) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

5) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

6) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"

7) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"

8) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

9) OFFER name tags to everyone getting on the elevator.

10) STAND silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. When someone questions you, say "I'm in time out"

Things to Think About:

Only in America do we sell hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America do we have drive-thru ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Why don't we ever see the headlines: "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

If Con is the opposite of Pro, is Congress the opposite of Progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Stupid Inventions:

1) Water-proof towel

2) Inflatable dartboard

3) Glow-in-the-dark sunglasses

4) Solar-powered flashlight

5) Screen door on a submarine

6) Black highlighter

7) Braille driver's manual

8) Powdered Water (that one's my favorite :D)

9) Air conditioning for motorcycles

Now that you're done reading my funny profile, try out one of my stories! :)