THE FOLLOWING IS MEANT AS A JOKE, AND IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE OFFENSIVE IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM... I'M TIRED OF RECIEVING MESSAGES THAT ACCUSE ME OF BEING A HOMOPHOBE, BECAUSE I CERTAINLY AM NOT. PLEASE DO NOT BLAME ME IF SARCASM IS BEYOND YOU.

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning. Also apparently those homosexual animals have picked up some unnatural behavior.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were
allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

(~o_o~)

Hey guys! In case you didn't notice, this is my NEW, IMPROVED, and EVEN MORE FABULOUS profile! w00t!

Moving on.

I apologize EXTENSIVELY for my sporodic updating. I should be punished! runs for cover

peeking out of hiding spot

So, hi. My name is Sarah, known to you all as Saran VD. I am a thespian (as in, officially inducted into the International Thespian Society). I am also in the vocal jazz program at my school (which won the Kennedy Center's Award for best fine arts in the country in 2008 _), and I dance ballet, jazz, and modern. I also write (duh).

Looking for a cool roleplaying site? Go to ! It's oodles of fun!

I know that I have more stuff to say, but I honestly don't remember what it was. This can officially be considered a work in progress. It'll be finished at some point. I promise.

Anyway, you should be reading (and reviewing! ;) ) my stories, not my profile!

+If your body provides a comfortable home for the acquired immune RENThead syndrome, copy this into your profile.

+OZheads are just trying to make they're way in a green world. If you are an OZhead then copy this to your profile!

+If when you go to sleep you can hear songs that you haven't heard in three years copy this to your proflie.

+If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insanse, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

+98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile

+92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.

+If George W. Bush is getting on your nerves for various reasons, copy and paste this into your profile.

+If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.

+If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

+Just because we eat animals for food, doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, ect, copy this onto your profile.

+If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile

+If you are so obsessed with Musical Theatre that you randomly start quoting it, copy this into your profile

+If you think that green skin is awesome, copy this into your profile.

+If you're Defying Gravity, and no one can pull you down, copy this into your profile.

+If you think that poor Mark should have found someone by the end of RENT, copy and paste this into your profile.

+!eliforp ruoy otni siht etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI

+I, Saran VD, do solemnly swear to review all the fics I enjoy, regardless of the number of reviews, its age, or anything else.
+I have joined the Review Revolution. Post this same thing in your profile and spread the love!

+If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

+If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

+If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.

+For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself . So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

+Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

+I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

+"I'm bringing sexy back..." Copy and paste this into your profile if you never even knew sexy was gone.

+If you think rap is the most God-awfulest thing to ever be called "music," and that rappers are wanna-be's who are being paid to make fools out of themselves and can't even sing, copy and paste this into your profile.--And always remember. Crap can't be spelled without first spelling rap.

+If you think Angel has the best legs this side of the Northern Hemisphere and only Collins deserves her, copy this into your profile.

+Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! (me: OMG YESS!!)

PLEASE REVIEW ALL MY STORIES IF YOU READ THEM! REVIEWS ARE COMPARABLE TO ALL OF MARK'S SPAZZY DANCES IN RENT!