Hi I'm Jessa! Here is some stuff about me

Name: Jessa

Age: Old enough

Address: Why do you want to know? STALKER!!

Job: OWNER OF SETH!!

Jacob: no your not

Me: Stop crushing my dreams!!

MUSIC:

I listen to every thing from Paramore to Red Jumpsuit Apparatus to Taylor Swift to Beyoncè to Never Shout Never to Dragonforce. I HATE Rap and most Death Metal. My fav. Artist for today is: Panic! At the Disco.

I used to hate The Jonas Brothers, but I have to say that Nick and Kevin have redeemed themselves. Kevin a LONNGG time ago by getting married and Nick in Les Miserables 25th anniversary! Joe is still kinda lagging but you can't really hate them anyway. They are actually kinda catchy. Yep. I said it. You gotta problem?

HAHAHAHAHA!!! THIS IS SARAH HACKING JESSIE'S PROFILE!!!!! I LOVE THIS GIRLLLL SOOO MUCH! I WANT SUGAR. SHE SHALL GIVE ME SUGAR!!!!!!! :D

RANDOM CONVOS WITH FRIENDS/FAMILY!!!

DO NOT COPY THE FOLLOWING!!

This really happened to me!!

Me: Hey Maddie.

Maddie: He Jessie, and all others that are listening.

Me: Maddie, sigh, there are no voices in your head!!

Maddie: Your just jealous cuz they don't talk to you!! Beides. I'm not crazy like amanda cuz I don't listen to them.

Me: Ya, remember that one time they told her to smack a bee that was hila-...

( While she talks i'm pointing behind her)

Maddie: Yeah, she has the worst taste in clothes I mean really, do the voices pick her outfits out t- She's behind me, isn't she?

Me: nods vigerously

Maddie: Should I run?

Me: Canada is the safest bet.

Maddie: ( Suddenly Dissapears from Homeroom.)

Amanda: ( clueless, or is she??) Hey where did Maddie go? I was about to invite you two to a Casting Crowns concert next week, but-

Maddie: ( re-appears) Oh. hey Amanda!! I'd love to go to the concert with you.

Amanda: Natasha's coming too

Natasha: ( she was off to the side the whole time) YAY!!

(After the concert the next week)

Me, Maddie and Natasha are sitting on Amanda's bed when she walks in with a baseball bat.)

Amanda: The voices tell me to kill-

Maddie: Canada?

Me: Canada.

Natasha: Brazil!!

( We all really run to Natasha's house, which is down the street.)

Amanda: -that spider on the wall.

(THE END)

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA After that we avoided here for a week!! MWHAHAHAHA!!

Me: soo.. I was wondering..

Jake: SNORE!

Me: Uhhh.. Jaybird?

Jake: snuffle SNORE!!

Maddie: LETS KILL HIM!!!

Me: No, his parents know he's here..

Maddie: Okay, bury him alive.

Me: Thats killing him

Maddie: ON ACCIDENT!!!

Me: Not really,

Maddie: We could say he fell in a sand pit and-

Me: Maddie, We are on campus IN THE LIBRARY!! People would notice!

Maddie:...dream crusher... I have dreamt about Jake d-

Jake: You've dreamed of ME!? I'm so flattered, but sadly, I do not like you in that way. I have a girlfriend.

Me: Named Emily

JAke: Exactly so... this can't work out.. I'm sorry... *walks away looking nervous*

Maddie: Great, now the guy I wanna kill thinks I wanna date him!

Me: At least he won't tell-

Maddie's phone: ITS EMMMILLLYY CALLLINNNGGG YOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUU!

Librarian: SSSSHH!

MAddie *whispering* hello?

Emily on the phone: WHAT DID YOU ASK MY BOYFRIEND!!

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Maddie: I didn't ask him anything we were talking about kiling him and he missunderstoo-

Emily: YOU WANT TO KILL HIM!!!??

Yep, sooo. Me and my bestie were in the library with a guy who's name I changed for this... His girlfriend got mad because we were plotting his assassination... soo yeah.

RC: I love you, I always have! Will you.. nah..

Me: *walks up* what are you-

RC: I love you so much, please, will you go back out with me again!! IM SORRY!

ME: We never went out..oooohhhhh. I get it.

RC: Your beautiful eyes, and your hair! I have been dreaming of you! I made a mistake, please take me back

Me: no, creep. You cheated on me

RC: I will give all that I am up for you you are my one love my-

Natasha: O.O

Jake: Oh, Natasha I'm glad your here I need to tell you that I'm-

Emily: DATING JESSIE!! I ALWAYS KNEW THIS DAY WAS COMING!!!

Me: NO!!! ITS NOT LIKE THAT!! HE WAS PRACTICING FOR THE PLAY!!!

RC: yeah! We were pretending she was pretty and wonderful and could sing and stuff-

Jessie: ...

Natasha: Ohhh, you better run boy.

RC: BRAZIL!!!*

Jessie: *grabs net* Its on! *runs after him*

Amanda: .. Why are they running at MY party?

RC: AHH!!! HELP ME!! *girly screams of terrror*

hehehe... i still have that net *twitch twitch*

Cheyne: Jessie, your retarted.

Jessie: Your an idiot.

Cheyne: You're adopted.

Jessie: No one loves you.

Cheyne: You an ignoramous.

Jessie: THATS NOT A WORD!!!

Cheyne: ... my point is proven.

Jessie: YOUR ERELEPHANT!!! HAHA!! You have NOTHING to do with elephants!!

Cheyne: Jessie... nevermind. I can't even think of a word to describe this.

I love my broski, even though he is sometimes right about me.

DK: MINECRAFT!!

Jessie: ...

DK: MINECRAFT!

Jessie:...

DK: I'm in space.

Jessie: Space?

DK: Space, I'm in space! I'M IN SPACE!

Jessie: ... SARAH!!!! SAVE ME!!!

DK: Space?

Portal 2 references.. though I've only played two player.. DK says its a portal 2 reference though..

Nw I'm gonna do an intro. I'm at Impact this week and we went to see Kung-fu panda. I was sitting with my friends Anna, Drewski, and Scottie and my bro Cheyne. This is how RETARDED I AM!

Po gets blown of the screen.*

Me (AKA JESSIE): *gasps extremely loud.*

Cheyne: *laughs extremely loud.*

Scottie: Geez *laughs*

Anna: *laughing gives me a thumbs up*

Drewski: *cracks smile*

Me: *whispering* Was I that loud?

Anna, Scottie, Cheyne, Amy and Jason: *guffawing and laughter thatnever seems to end.*

Drewski: *chuckles once*

Me: *blushes*

Amy and Jason were at the end of our row... :(. I kinda get into my movies. Now this one happens later:

On screen*

Tigress: NO! *pushes Po*

off screen*

Me: NO!

Drewski: *laughs out loud for real this time*

Cheyne: Jeez Jessie!

Scottie: Hey, be nice *laughs*

Anna: It's okay Jessie, look they're safe in the water now.

I was chilling with my friend Amanda, watching the new teen wolf episode. *SPOILER ALERT*

Amanda: This is the episode where Derek dies.

Me: WHAT NO!!

on screen at the end of the episode*

Scott: Where's my boss?

Derek: Whats that sound?

Alpha: *puts his hand through dereks tummy*

Derek: *gets thrown against the wall, blood trickles out of his mouth.*

off screen*

Me: NO!!!! HE IS ALIVE!!

Amanda: THATS WHAT ME AND NATASHA THINK!

Me: HE MUST HEAL!!!

Amanda: HE CAN NEVER DIE! HE IS TOO DANG SEXY!!!

Me: I WOULDN'T GO THAT FAR!

Amanda: I WOULD GO ALL THE WAY!!!

Me: YOU ARE DISGUSTING!!!

Yep, she is just that weird, but I love her. And she was just kidding... hopefully.

ANOTHER INTRO!!!! The Sunday after Harry Potter came out.

Noah: I've seen it 3 times already.

Me: Wow.

Noah: I went to the midnight showing and twice yesterday. I've learned half the lines.

ONE WEEK LATER*

Me: NOAH!!! I've seen it 4 times!

Noah: I've seen it 5 times!

Me: WE SHOULD GO WITH PEOPLE AND SAY ALL THE LINES IN THE MOVIE OBNOXIOUSLY!!!

Noah: Josh saw it with me twice!

Me: my friend Emily has seen it three times.

Drewski: I've seen it twice...

Me: You can come too!!!

*Next is some of my favorite quotes that were said that night*

Noah: *in a heavy Irish accent* Asashakinniakasashitoo. 'Arry talks in his sleep.

Me and Emily: NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU BEEEPP!!!

Drewski: *sounding hurt* I really- I really thougt he would come.

EVERYONE IN THE THEATRE: Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived. Come to die.

After voldemorts first speech where he invites Harry into the Forbidden Forest. Me: VOLDEMORT OUT, BITCHES!! (Starkid 4ever!!!! He's the guy that did the Harry Potter musical!!)

Josh: I really don't know any of the lines... oh! *clears throat* "Come on Tom, lets finish this the way we started. TOGETHER!"

Drewski: You've kept him like a lamb for slaughter. You've kept him alive so that he can die at the proper moment.

Noah and Abbey: You do have your mother's eyes.

Me: pedifile!

Emily: *fake crying* Here lies Dobby. A free elf.

Dewski: Does it hurt?

Me: Dying? Not at all! Quicker and easier than falling asleep.

Abbey: Of course its happening inside your head Harry, but why on Earth should that mean its not real?

*My Favorite Boy Crazy-Country-Chic (pronounced Sheek)-sister moved to Florida!!!! :( MISS YOU LOTS MANDY!!!!!!!!!!*

Anna: Hey! Whats wrong?

Me: What do you mean "what's wrong?"

Anna: When I saw you earlier today, you weren't smiling.

Sarah: Oh! Something must really be wrong then.

Me: How come no one ever believes my regular facial expression isn't smiling?

Anna and Sarah: It isn't.

So... These next few have to do with... Marching Band!!!!

Ebert (the band director): So, Matt and Matt, your the only two playing that part. Play out, the rest of you, get down!

Carrie: We can call them M&M!!!!

Ebert: Actually, Alex has that part too, so it would be MMA

Ashley: *whispers* or MAM

Ebert: Who said that?

Ashley: *points at me*

Sarah: *points at me*

ME* points at them*

Ebert: Good call Jessie.

Me: D: I didn't say that!

Now, for some blonde moments with Jessie! (and Trevor)

Me: Soo. whats your favorite color?

Trevor: I like Orange.

Me: Whats your- Wait, have you been to Bush Gardens?

Trevor: uh, yeah. I went with band last year, remember

Me: Oh! We were in the same group and everything! *face palm*

Trevor: Yep.

A few days later*

Me: *runs into a drum* Oh! Hey Trevor!

Trevor: Hi.

Me: Are you gonna be at the football game tonight?

Trevor: ... yeah...

Me: *blushes* Wait! Nevermind! I'm blonde!

Trevor: Just think about what your going to say. Breathe.

Me: I'm sorry!

Trevor: its okay,

Me: *sighes* I was just trying to start conversation and.. I don't know. You try thinking of a question to start a conversaion.

Trevor: I don't know.

Me: Exactly! Its hard!

Just for the record, we had just played in the Homecoming parade and were walking back after the pep rally. Yep, thats how my mind works.

Sarah: If you play that note one more time, I'm not going to feed you when your at my house for 4 days!

Me: buh-buh- but

Sarah: And I mean it!

ME: But, my tummy like food...

Sarah: Then don't play it again! You make small children cry when you play it!

Me:... *plays note*

Sarah: Thats it! Your going to starve!

Me: Then I'll sneak out in the middle of the night and eat all your food!

Sarah: ... I'll know its you!

Me: I'll blame it on Paul! MWA-HA-HA-HA!!!

Once again, not smiling is apparently "not my thing"

Anna: Whats wrong? *hug*

ME: nothing! *giggle* that tickles! Stop!

Anna: All I did was give you a hug! Your trying to change the subject aren't you?

Me: No! Seriously, everything is fine and dandy in my world! Really!

Anna: Tell me! Seriously, soemthings wrong!

Me: No, nothings wrong.

Anna: Your lying!

Me: Nothings wrong! My God woman!!!

Anna: I'll text you later then!

Me: Uh, my phones dead. And out of minutes. And lost.

Anna: You're just saying that! I'll call your home phone later then!

Me: No! I'm fine.

Anna: NO, your not! Stop lying to me, I know when you lie!

Me: Apparently you don't, because I'm not! Everything is OKAY! DO I need to spell it out? O-K-Y!

Anna: ... so, I'll call you later!

Me: NO!!!

Trever: You spelled ok wrong...

Me: I know...

LOLZ!! Anyway, this is what happens in band when I'm nice to people.

Me: No one came to my house on Halloween because its hidden by trees, who wants candy?

Everyone in band: ME!!!! OMNOMNOMNOM

Jake: Hey Jessie, you got any candy?

Me: Here.

(5 mins later)

JAke: You have candy?

Me: You were here earlier, jeez. Take some if you want!

(five more minutes)

Jake: Is that candy?

Me: JUST TAKE IT!

Five more minutes.

Jake: What? Candy?

Me: groan. *throws crunch bar at his head*

Next Day:

JAke: Got any candy?

Me: Take it.

(NEXT DAY!)

Jake: Candy?

Me: NO!

Jake: .. Your a b*h

Me: Wha... What? *sad face*

Kaylee: OMG! Jake!

Jake: *looks at me* I was kidding! Jeez! I'm mean!

Chris: Yes, yes you are.

Matt: *puts arm around Chris' shoulders* what did I miss?

Me: Jake being mean!

Matt: Aww... does somebody need a hug?

Me: Yes.

Matt: *holds out arms*

Chris: *hugs me* INTERCEPTION!

Me: Wow.

Matt: Group hug!

Jake: aww...

Kaylee: Yay! Hugs!

UGH!!! IM BORED!! URGLEURGLEURGLE

So, we got our Christmas tree today:

(Some duude follows me and my mom and broski into the tree farm area. We look around, laughing and stuff.)

Me: Mom, I like this one!

Mom: Lets see, 45$? Really? Thats super cheap!

Cheyne: Its ugly, I don't like it.

Random Dude: Need any help?

Mom: We're still looking.

after looking at 3 others*

Cheyne: I like this one.

Mom: Its kind of tall. 60$? Really good price though. Lets compare this one and the one Jessie Liked.

(Another dude joins the second. He stays next to the tree, first dude STILL follows us.)

Cheyne: I want mine.

Mom: Lets go back to Cheyne's and look.

We walk ten feet*

Mom: I'm lost!

Me: Its right here, mom!

Mom: Oh, where's Cheyne? Is this it? Hey, it looks shorter... Did you cut off the top while we were gone?

Second guy smiles and motions to the first*

Ist dude: Whoa, I was folloeing them the whole time!

Cheyne: I'm here, I like it! Let's get it!

Mom: Alright, can you wrap it up and tie to our car?

Dudes: Yes ma'am.

Mom: Thanks, and great salesmanship!

Yep, one guy stalked us, and his friend cut off the end of the tree so that we'd buy it. GREAT STALKERSHIP!

Mom: Lets go compare

Realationship therapy. Jessa Style.

Today class, you are going to learn how exactly you can know about your bf/gf. now, will everyone in a relationship please do not read the following because it is the result of 5 friends, 10 2liter bottles of Sunkist, millions of skittles, and 4 1/2 sappy romances.

Do not EVER!! EVER!! TRUST ONE OF THE STUPID BLOGGERS WHO SAY THEY HAVE THE CURE FOR BAD RELATIONSHIPS!! N-E-V-E-R!! THEY NEVER KNOW!! THIS MAY OR MAY NOT INCLUDE ME!! GRRRR!! THEY LIE!! ESPECIALLY IN THE AMAZING MOVIE THE PRINCESS BRIDE!! COMMERCIALS ARE OVER YAY!!

I am a free spirit.

I am not tied down.

I am who I want to be.

I am dangerous.

I am proud.

I am beautiful.

I am loud.

I am the most obnoxious person you wll ever meet.

I am strong.

I am crazy.

I am ME!!

'Tis the end. Or is it...

Seriously, WHY?? I really hate people who start dissing people

randomly. And if you do it to one of my friends:

I WILL FIND YOU!!

(cue evil laugh followed by tiny giggle.)

STOP TEH PAST LINKS

(THis is also what I think she looks like)First day of school outfit for Tia: http:///imgres?imgurl=http:///pictures/tbagssweethearttop.jpg&imgrefurl=http:///archives/2008_12.php&usg=_s-iXdfxMRE3SXciNWs9K6uifrFQ=