My new account is TheTypist55. This is an old account I had when I was a child, and I wanted to make a new one now that I'm an adult, but I'm publicly announcing this change because some people think that my new account is an imposter stealing my old stories. It's still me! :) I'm going to leave my old bio for posterity's sake, but please know that this account is no longer active, and my current work is at TheTypist55.

Hey! My favorite movie is Saving Private Ryan, and I love Band of Brothers, too. My favorite book of all time would definitely have to be Harry Potter. I watch movies all the time- my favorite thing to do. I mainly watch comedies, but I like action, too. And I love animals, especially dogs. I did, indeed, name my username after my dog, Phoenix.

I don't really know what else to say except that the stories I write on here are mainly Saving Private Ryan stories, and I despise mathematical formulas. I'm currently a film student in college, and I'm loving every minute of it.

My English teacher seems to think that there are some flaws in my writing (run-on sentences, skirts around ideas without fully developing them, blah, blah, blah), so if you find any, it'd be unbelievably awesome if you could tell me. Really. I much prefer getting reviews telling me why someone hated my story than not getting any reviews at all.

Let's see...I love Psych, the Office (Andy and Dwight are hilarious), 8 Simple Rules, Modern Family, Raising Hope, and I've been trying to get the chance to watch Six Feet Under, because I've heard it's good. I am also guilty of getting my news reports solely from the Colbert Report.

Favorite Quotes:

"I've always felt bad for people with emotionally distant fathers; it turns out I'm one of them. It's a miracle I didn't end up a stripper." - Phil Dunphy

"When I get home I'm gonna scrub this place like it's a crime scene, which it is because you murdered joy." - Cam Tucker

"A relationship with your father-in-law is tough. You need to prove you can stand up to him, while being respectful. It's like walking a tightrope, which by the way I can do because I went to trapeze school." - Phil Dunphy

“Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash." - Stephen Colbert

“It's like boxing a glacier. Enjoy that metaphor, by the way, because your grandchildren will have no idea what a glacier is.” - Stephen Colbert

"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh man...I could be eating a slow learner." -Lynda Montgomery

“Twenty-two astronauts were born in Ohio. What is it about your state that makes people want to flee the Earth?" - Stephen Colbert

".. almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”- Steve Jobs

“The more you know, the sadder you get.”- Stephen Colbert

"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying."- Woody Allen

"Ignorance is bliss. Oedipus ruined a great sex life by asking too many questions."- Stephen Colbert

"I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit."- George Burns

"According to the L.A. Times, Attorney General John Ashcroft wants to take "a harder stance" on the death penalty. What's a harder stance on the death penalty? We're already killing the guy? How do you take a harder stance on the death penalty? What, are you going to tickle him first? Give him itching powder? Put a thumbtack on the electric chair?"- Jay Leno

"My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying."- Ed Furgol

"I spend money with reckless abandon. Last month I blew 5000 at a reincarnation. I got to thinking, what the hell, you only live once!"- Ronnie Shakes

"All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than animals that know nothing."- Maurice Maeterlinck

"Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box."- Will Shriner

"After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one."- Cato

"People travel to wonder at the height of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars; and they pass by themselves without wondering. "- Saint Augustine

"Life is NOT a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- ’WOW, what a ride!! "- Unknown

"Life is a fatal adventure. It can only have one end. So why not make it as far-ranging and free as possible?"- Alexander Eliot

“If I had a dime for every time that I was wrong, I'd be broke.”- Stephen Colbert.