Author has written 11 stories for W.I.T.C.H., Avatar: Last Airbender, Mass Effect, El Tigre, Warcraft, Wayside, Watashi ga Motenai no wa Dou Kangaete mo Omaera ga Warui!, Fallout, and StarCraft. "I am poetic, I am just, I write stories, I think, I make, I am thinker; I am a writer." Jokester time: Monkey Organization An organization is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels. Some monkeys are climbing up, some down. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but asses. 10 Reasons Not To Jog 1. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now & we don't know where the heck she is. 2. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again. 3. I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up. 4. I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. 5. I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up our body. 6. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. 7. I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them. 8. The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier. 9. If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country. 10. I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. Bear Hunt Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another!" Helping To Clean The Dishes Just after the maid had been fired, she took five bucks from her purse and threw it to Fido, the family dog. When asked why by her former employer, she answered, "I never forget a friend. This was for helping me clean the dishes all the time!" Mix Up at the Hospital This guy went to hospital for a circumcision, but because of a mix up, he ended up having a complete sex change. All of the doctors and nurses had gathered around his bed as he was waking up so they could give him the bad news. Naturally, the poor guy went to pieces and started crying when they explained what had happened to him. "Oh no!" he moaned, "this means I'll never be able to have an experience ever again!" "Of course you will," one of the doctors soothed. It'll just have to be someone else's, that's all." |
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