Hey! I have been jumping around here a lot but then I discovered this thing called 'tumblr' so, yeah... You can find me there at -- frostystuffs

PSA: I do most of my fanfic reading through an app on my phone called 'Pocket Fiction' where if I fav/follow a story, it gets saved there. Usually, I fav a story then go to the app and download it then read it there because I don't need Internet to read it from the app after it's been downloaded. This helps me because I'm on a limited data and can't use a lot of it because of a shared plan. So, if I fav and not review, or fav then un-fav, it's because I'm just trying to save them to my phone. Sorry y'all!

I've recently hit a major writing block. Usually, when prompts could get thousands of words out of me and get me writing long chapter stories, I just... Don't feel it. That doesn't mean I won't try! Because I will. I simply ask that you have patience with me. I'll do my very best to write the most and best I can!

Criticism is definitely welcome. I know that I'm far from perfect in my writing, so instead of turning your back on my stories if my characterization is off or my grammar is lacking, please tell me about it. I want to learn. I want to progress. If you'd be willing to help me do that, I'd be very grateful.

STORIES:

We Are Family: I try to update whenever I get inspiration to. Maybe three times a week, maybe three times a month. It depends. Prompts are always wanted, but please be mindful that I'm trying to stay close to canon and that there's certain things I'm just not good at writing. I'll tell you if I can't get to your prompt, but they're still appreciated.

She's in Danger: Total of 3 chapters, all complete. I actually am having technical issues with getting the chapters transferred so I can post them, and honestly, I'm a bit too busy at the moment to deal with it. I have a beta going over them for me and hopefully by the time she's done, the final chapter will be up!

One, Two, Three, Four, I declare a time war,

Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Daleks scream 'Exterminate!',

Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, The Doctor died and silence fell,

Twelve, Eleven, Ten, Nine, Here he goes back in time,

Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Saving everybody's lives,

Four, Three, Two, One, Grab her hand and whisper 'Run'

Why is the box blue?

Rose went away, so the Doctor was blue,

Ask Donna 'Where's the Doctor?' she reply, 'Doctor Who?'

Sarah Jane, Martha and now both the Ponds too,

have been with the Doctor and they've all gone too.

So ask me ask me again, why the TARDIS is blue:

There's a sad man inside, with his hearts torn in two.

Jesus had no servants, yet they called Him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called Him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called Him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared Him...

He won no military battles, yet He conquered the world...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He still lives today...

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school.

He told his friends that it was cool

And when he pulled the trigger back

It shot with a great crack.

Mummy I was a good girl,

I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's,

I even got the gold!

But mummy when I went to school that day,

I never said goodbye.

I'm sorry mummy I had to go,

But mommy please don't cry!

When Johnny shot the gun

He hit me and another

And all because he got the gun

From his older brother!

Mummy please tell daddy

That I love him very much

And please tell Chris, my boyfriend,

That it wasn't just a crush

And tell my little sister

That she is the only one now

And tell my dear sweet grandmother

That I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends

That they were always the best

Mummy I'm not the first

I'm no better than the rest

Mummy tell my teachers

I won't show up for class

And never to forget this

And please don't let this pass

Mummy why'd it have to be me

No one deserves this

Mummy warn the others,

Mummy I left without a kiss

And mummy tell the doctors

I know they really did try

I think I even saw a doctor

Trying not to cry Mummy

I'm slowly dying

With a bullet in my chest

But mummy please remember

I'm in heaven with the rest

Mummy I ran as fast as I could

When I heard that crack

Mummy listen to me if you would

I wanted to go to college

I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with daddy

On that trip to the zoo

I wanted to get married

I wanted to have a kid

I wanted to be an actress

Mummy I wanted to live

But mummy I must go now

The time is getting late Mummy

Tell my Chris I'm sorry

But I had to cancel the date

I love you mummy I always have

I know you know it's true Mummy

All I wanted to say is "Mummy I love you"

In memory of the Columbian students that were lost

"If you deny Me, then I shall deny you before my Father in the gates of Heaven".

-Jesus Christ

Girls

are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

A black man walked into a cafe early one morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.

The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:

"When I was born I was black,

"When I grew up I was black,

"When I'm sick I'm black,

"When I go in the sun I'm black,

"When I'm cold I'm black,

"When I die I'll be black.

"But you sir...

"When you're born you're pink,

"When you grow up you're white,

"When you're sick, you're green,

"When you go in the sun you turn red,

"When you're cold you turn blue,

"And when you die you turn purple.

"And yet you have the nerve to call me coloured!"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away . . .

The pledge of a good fanfiction author:

No matter how old the fanfiction is, read it.

No matter how many reviews it already has, review it.

Even if there are no reviews, read the story if you like the summary.

If it is the worst piece of writing out there, do not flame.

NEVER, EVER DELIBERATELY TRASH A PERSON BECAUSE THEIR WRITING IS BAD!

Don't be afraid to speak your mind.

Do not steal ideas.

Remember to update your own stories regularly.

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He was outlived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

RIP: We shall remember

"THE SOLDIERS NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS"

“Merry Christmas, My Friend” by LCpl James M Schmidt, USMC, 1986

Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone,

In a one bedroom house made of plaster & stone.

I had come down the chimney, with presents to give

and to see just who in this home did live

As I looked all about, a strange sight I did see,

no tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.

No stocking by the fire, just boots filled with sand.

On the wall hung pictures of a far distant land.

With medals and badges, awards of all kind,

a sobering thought soon came to my mind.

For this house was different, unlike any I'd seen.

This was the home of a U.S. Marine.

I'd heard stories about them, I had to see more,

so I walked down the hall and pushed open the door.

And there he lay sleeping, silent, alone,

Curled up on the floor in his one-bedroom home.

He seemed so gentle, his face so serene,

Not how I pictured a U.S. Marine.

Was this the hero, of whom I’d just read?

Curled up in his poncho, a floor for his bed?

His head was clean-shaven, his weathered face tan.

I soon understood, this was more than a man.

For I realized the families that I saw that night,

owed their lives to these men, who were willing to fight.

Soon around the Nation, the children would play,

And grown-ups would celebrate on a bright Christmas day.

They all enjoyed freedom, each month and all year,

because of Marines like this one lying here.

I couldn’t help wonder how many lay alone,

on a cold Christmas Eve, in a land far from home.

Just the very thought brought a tear to my eye.

I dropped to my knees and I started to cry.

He must have awoken, for I heard a rough voice,

"Santa, don't cry, this life is my choice

I fight for freedom, I don't ask for more.

My life is my God, my country, my Corps."

With that he rolled over, drifted off into sleep,

I couldn't control it, I continued to weep.

I watched him for hours, so silent and still.

I noticed he shivered from the cold night's chill.

So I took off my jacket, the one made of red,

and covered this Marine from his toes to his head.

Then I put on his T-shirt of scarlet and gold,

with an eagle, globe and anchor emblazoned so bold.

And although it barely fit me, I began to swell with pride,

and for one shining moment, I was Marine Corps deep inside.

I didn't want to leave him so quiet in the night,

this guardian of honor so willing to fight.

But half asleep he rolled over, and in a voice clean and pure,

said "Carry on, Santa, it's Christmas Day, all is secure."

One look at my watch and I knew he was right,

Merry Christmas my friend, Semper Fi and goodnight.

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't. A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.

The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone.

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him.
So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'

He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'

There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.

We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation.I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.

Some Useful Condescending Phrases

Some useful phrases to use as an Evil Overlord as given by Steve Meredith. These humorous cuts were originally listed as useful phrases to use around work but they probably only work well if you are a Evil Overlord(TM).

1) Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2) The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
3) I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
4) Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
5) I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't care.
6) I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
7) What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
8) I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
9) I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10) I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
11) It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
12) Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
13) No, my powers can only be used for good.
14) How about never? Is never good for you?
15) I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
16) You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
17) I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
18) I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
19) I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
20) Who me? I just wander from room to room.
21) My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
22) It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
23) At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
24) You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
25) I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
26)Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

“My battery is low and it is getting dark” weren’t Oppy’s literal last words, her last message to earth was a readout of her battery power and light sensor readings, something that I think is nonetheless sad. But what I find astounding is we’ve translated that last message into language that is so poetic and humane, and IMO that speaks powerfully of the lengths that human empathy can reach. I really think that says something beautiful, and I need to go hug my Roomba.

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

1. Children's Asprin: Warning: Keep Away From Children

3. Curling Iron: Warning: Do not use while sleeping

4. Candle: Warning: A burning candle is fire

5. Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking

6. Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado

7. Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts

8. Butcher Knife: Warning: Keep Out of Children

9. Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.

10. Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping

11. Dial Soap: Warning: Use like regualr soap

13. Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required

15. On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

16. On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

17. On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

18. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

19. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought??...)

20. On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?

21. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

22. On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because??...)

23. On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?

24. On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious)

25. On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

26. On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, ooh...fly Delta?)

27. On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

28. On a Korean kitchen knife-- "Warning: keep out of children."
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..)

29. On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my ..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

This is this cat

This is is cat

This is how cat

This is to cat

This is keep cat

This is a cat

This is retard cat

This is busy cat

This is for cat

This is forty cat

This is seconds cat

Now read the THIRD word of every line. X