YES I'M STILL HERE BUT... With all the pressure, writing is beginning to feel like an obligation. When an escape became a duty, it looses its appeal.

I will complete my stories but it will be in my own time, at my own pace.

I also have a lot on my plate at the moment. Hence, not much time for writing. I’m afraid I’m not willing to give up my real life for a fictional one. Real life will always take precedence.

The next three chapter titles of my on-going stories are posted below as a sign of good faith that I haven’t given up on my stories.

Posted on fanfiction: 27 December 2014

I’m a triple major: law, chemistry and computer.

I’m also multilingual, able to read and understand (but not as comfortable writing or speaking) six languages besides my native language. English is not my mother tongue, but my stories will be written in this medium. So, do be patient as I try to improve...

I love reading. I read when I’m stressed out and I read when I’m not. No matter how busy I am or how crazy my world gets, I always return to the written words.

Naturally, I prefer reading to writing. But when the mood strikes me, which on occasions, is rather often, I can write up quite a storm.

I write for fun and I do it in my spare time. For me, it’s a form of escapism from a life filled with obligations, my own personal guilty pleasure.

I can’t promise a regular update on any of my stories because I don’t know when the mood will strike or when I’ll find the spare time to do so. Sometimes, I'm able to write so much in a week and then there are times when I don't even want to write at all for weeks.

My writings come from the mind and the heart. I can't write when my heart is not in it nor can I write when my mind is blank. Unfortunately, more often than not, when both my heart and mind are in agreement, I find myself lacking the time. Hence, for me to write, I need to have all three and I need to be able to in the first place.

mind heart time health = updates

Secret ingredient: Positive reviews make scatter happy. Happy, inspired scatter writes more. Sad, disheartened scatter writes less.

A tip: Sometimes I am writing and then a demand comes for immediate updates. When that happens, it usually just puts me off my writing and I went and do something else instead (I do have a lot going on in my life after all). So instead of getting a faster update, you will more likely end up with a later one. So, just wait patiently.

Loosely though, updates will depend on the completion of my personal ‘Fibonacci List’ (which changes accordingly with circumstances) an example of which can be found in Chapter 10 of TOBITF. The list has to stay so that my work / studies / research / other obligations get fulfilled, my stories get written and I don't burn out!

WARNING:

Don't review my stories with negative, discouraging remarks. Give your thoughts by all means, but there is no need to be unkind / condescending.

Don't flood my inbox with demands. I don't respond well to force or harsh words. You'd do better to request / suggest.

Don’t try and write my stories for me. Write your own version if you’re so inclined.

Chapter Titles to Look Forward to:

Posted on fanfiction: 27 December 2014

TOBITF chapters 25, 26 & 27: Back Together & Meet the Parents, Serena & Darien and Remembering the Past.

PC chapters 4, 5 & 6: Pivotal Confrontation, Profound Candour, Pleasant Company, Platonic Civility and Probable Cause, Precarious Circle

EA chapters 4, 5 & 6: Misfits & Mishaps, Phobos & Deimos, Philotes & Neikos and Growing Up & Growing Pain

Please note that these may be subject to change since each has only either been partially written/only in my head.

A side note... (Posted on fanfiction: 05 March 2013)

Usually when I read a story and I want to say something nice, I’d review it. When I’m trying to give constructive critics, I tend to PM instead. I guess I do it to protect the pride of the author and to let him/her decide privately how to respond to it. Mostly though, I do it to keep my thoughts / opinions (which may not be perceived as positive) from colouring the thoughts of other readers out there that has every right to judge that particular story for themselves, especially regarding issues that may be sensitive.

I guess it’s rather naive of me to expect the same courtesy from everyone else but a part of me can’t help but to do so.

There is a saying in my country that can’t be directly translated to English but if I were to have my own version for that saying it would be:

“It only takes a drop of Cyanide to ruin a perfectly good, healthy, delicious jug of Orange Juice!”

That is how I feel about my readers. I’ve been blessed with a base of loyal readers (the delicious jug of OJ) who have been wonderful and kind in their reviews and support. But once in a blue moon, I come across reviews/reviewers (the very small drop of CN) that have really bothered me, stressed me out and made me sad and angry. When this happens, I tend to take a break from my writing simply because I write to escape the stress of real life. Not to get more stress and grief. Especially with my more often than not, overflowing plate. Simply put, I have neither the time, energy nor the inclination to deal with extra stress.

So, put careful thoughts before you subject my stories to baseless innuendoes and unkind words. Have the courtesy to PM me first for clarification. Give me the chance to defend / amend my writing. I'm only human. I'm not perfect. But I do believe that words have weight.

Another side note... (Posted on fanfiction: 28 October 2014)

Since the release of Perfect Couple, more and more readers have started to scrutinise my stories, down to not just my choice of words but also every alphabet, comma, space and period that I used.

I’d just like to stress again that while writing is a much cherished escape for me, I have no aspiration to become an actual fiction writer. But that does not mean that I don’t bother to double check my writings. I actually more than triple check them sometimes. However, formatting do get displaced a fair number of times when posted on this site and proofreading and double checking won’t change the glitch in the system. I do try to go in and fix as much as I can every chance I get. But as I’m writing for the fun of it, for myself and the few loyal readers that do find joy in my writing, it’s not a major concern of mine that I would drop everything for it and since I’m not taking any form of payment for my stories, I don’t see the need to turn my writing into an obligation either.

As for the spelling, different countries have different usage sometimes (even UK and US spellings differ on thousands of words) and English is still a language I’m trying to master.

I’m more accustomed to UK English as opposed to US English since my last three Bachelor’s Degrees and two Master’s Degrees were obtained from the UK. My current Double Doctorates, which I’m undertaking in my own country, are also conducted in an academic establishment which implement UK English rather than US English. As such, you’ll find that I tend to spell apologise instead of apologize, colour instead of color, favourite instead of favorite and as with the British usage, you’ll find no period after my ‘Mr’ and ‘Mrs’.

Other than that, rest assured that if a spelling / grammar mistake gets picked up by the word processor, I get them fixed immediately. In the mean time however, I’m doing the best I can.

In all fairness, there are even errors in the Harry Potter Series and the Twilight Series. These are stories that are printed in millions, translated to different languages and published and sold all over the world. I’m sure they have been proofread and edited more than a few times by established, experienced editors, paid handsomely to do what is their job.

"As obsessive fans will tell you, I do slip up! Several classrooms move floors mysteriously between books and these are the least serious continuity errors! Most of the fansites will point you in the direction of my mistakes. But the essentials remain consistent from book to book because the story has been plotted for a long time and it is clear in my mind." — J. K. Rowling on the errors within the HP franchise

Fanfiction is a site for amateur authors. It is rather unfair to expect inexperienced authors writing not just for fun but also for free, to have higher standards than these established authors and editors. Either way, mistakes are bound to happen because even the best beta / editor would still be human, not infallible to human imperfections / errors. In fact, even machines / programs still make mistakes. Nothing and no one is perfect. I certainly never claimed to be nor would I expect the same of others.

Hence, knowing my stand on the matter, you now have the option to either 1. Continue reading my work accepting that chances are it will not be perfect OR 2. If coping with my flawed spelling / grammar / formatting and limited English would cause you a big problem, to stop reading my work.

I’m okay with either. The choice is completely yours.

My Thought Process:

Posted on fanfiction: 28 October 2014

It’s strange the way my mind works. More often than not, my stories came to my mind almost fully formed inside my head. I don’t know how to explain it. But the backgrounds, facts and the ending would just be there.

The journey may change because I won’t know which events/scenes to write first (the words / feelings don’t come as easily as the knowledge). I usually get snippets (words in my head describing an emotion/situation. They may consist of one liners / whole paragraphs/conversations). I incorporate them into my chapters as I see fit. However, I'm afraid my creative mind is, as opposed to my organised academic mind, extremely chaotic. My snippets don't come in sequence and therefore I don't write my chapters in sequence.

What I do is create chapter titles, each to represent certain ‘scenes’ I see in my mind. I then build the complete chapters by writing around those scenes / chapter titles.

Every time I realign my thoughts, I rearrange my chapter titles, rearranging sequences in my head without changing what it sees. Hence, my chapter titles ARE my general story outline and I just narrate what my mind sees to the best of my ability.

Readers may have their own ideas of which direction my stories should take. I’m okay with that as long as these ideas are not forced on me.

It doesn’t really matter how much readers insist or demand that I write a certain story / scene their way (this happened / happens a lot with TOBITF and CBTM but is especially bad with PC) At the end of the day, I will write my story my way because I write what I see in my head and what feels right to me. I don’t know how to write any other way, nor do I want to.

I always write my endings first because I usually know how my stories end. My stories will be told the way I envisioned them to be, regardless of readers’ expectations / demands. Every now and then however, something a reader says will trigger additional snippet(s) / scene(s) in my mind. When that happens, these snippets / scenes too will be incorporated into the stories and credit given where credit is due.

Posted on fanfiction: 11 February 2013

Updated: 28 October 2014

Ever After @ EA (Posted: 30 September 2014; On-going)

An idea that formed as I was trying to write TOBITF. Next thing I know, I have kingdoms built inside my head with winged horses, wild stallions, phoenix, hippocampus, magical doves and crows and hippogriff! My first ever attempt at medieval fantasy, this story will follow Endymion, Serenity, Senshi and Shitennou from childhood to adulthood as they discover eternal friendship and everlasting love (hence the title!)

S plus D equals little s squared plus little d squared @ SD=ssdd (Posted: 22 September 2013; On-going)

Drabbles set in the TOBITF world. Due to my illness and hectic schedule, my update on TOBITF is slowing down. This is my attempt to make it up to my TOBITF readers. Since TOBITF chapters are long (exceeding 5500 words on occasions), drabbles (mostly consisting of 300-1000 words) takes less time and hopefully will result in faster updates. Do check it out! ;)

Perfect Couple @ PC (Posted: 04 October 2014; On-going)

Titled after Episode 132 of the SM series that inspired it. It is harsher than my other stories, filled with bitterness and resentment. I just feel that Serena keeps a lot to herself, despite the wailing and the crocodile tears. I think she took a lot, accepted a lot, and give too much of herself without being recognised or appreciated. The way the anime (original, not Crystal) presented it, I see some of the people closest to her as being the most detrimental to her self-esteem. They didn’t just take her for granted but also put her down rather consistently. In this story, Serena is finally lashing out. Where CBTM made adjustment to how Darien and Scouts should react, this story adjusted Serena’s reaction. Dedicated to SailorMoonForever, a friend dear to my heart, who made me laugh and laughed with me.

Come Back to Me @ CBTM (Posted: 14 March 2013; Completed: 12 August 2013)

My version of the R break-up. It is sadder than my other stories, filled with hurt and longing. Basically, I think the anime blazed through the breakup without giving Darien’s character (or any of the Scouts) a fair treatment. I wanted to show the Scouts' roles as concerned friends (they weren't very supportive in the anime, were they?) and to cover Darien's struggle (I really think the anime neglected this) and his way back to her heart. Hence, this story covers the Scout’s individual interaction with Serena and Darien separately. There is no Rini. Though the story is written in such a way that Rini fans could imagine that she simply hasn’t been sent yet during the duration this story took place. Dedicated to Shaydoe, my very first friend on ff, whom I love dearly, keeps me sane and calms me down.

Let Me Show You @ LMSY (Posted: 11 February 2013; Completed: 23 February 2013)

Originally planned to be Serena-Darien’s first time in TOBITF but as that particular fic unfold, I decided to go in a different direction for their first time there. So I put my original scene into a different context and converted the idea into LMSY instead. It's a journey of discovery told in a three-shot, which was intended to be sweet and passionate.

Before The Clock Strikes Midnight @ BTCSM (Posted: 04 February 2013; Completed: 09 February 2013)

An idea that wouldn’t leave me alone became a three-shot. I was going to turn it into a comedy of errors of some sort but didn’t think I could manage writing two big plots at the same time. Hence, this story is short, light, sweet and simple (in my opinion!)

The Only Blonde in the Family @ TOBITF (Posted: 26 January 2013; On-going)

My first attempt at creative writing (as opposed to academic writing!). I have the plot worked out (mostly). I have (almost) all the titles to all the chapters and most chapters have at least one line of snippet either written in my note book, typed in my computer or drafted in my head. The last chapter and Epilogue are already written (pending the final revisions, of course!). I basically know where the story is heading but a less clear view of how it will get there. The conception of Darren, Darryl, Sara and Suri Shields was my chance to explore my idea of what Serena and Darien’s children would/should be like (I seriously could not comprehend where Rini gets her disrespectful attitude from) especially with such a kind hearted mother and a charismatic intellectual father. I hope you’ll give them (and this story) a chance! ;p

Well, that’s it from me for now. Thanks for taking the time to read my work.