Mirany Hunter
 Author has written 4 stories for Angel, and NCIS. Hey, I guess the place to begin with is that I am an avid Buffy and Angel fan. I write myself into almost all of my stories, tweaking my appearance and stuff but basically, if you want a basic description of me, read my stuff because that's gonna tell you everything you need to know, except my life story, and that's so boring I'm just not even gonna go there. I started watching Buffy a few years ago and once I'd seen the first episode I was more than definitely hooked. I began to watch Angel maybe a few months afterwards and I was hooked just as much. My friends always ask me which character is my favourite. In truth, I have no clue, there are too many and I just love them all really but if I absolutely had to choose, I'd go with Xander (although I have quite a thing for Faith, she's petty awesome) in Buffy and Doyle (Cordelia coming in a close second) in Angel. I know he didn't have a long run, but I never got over him and I'm not really sure Angel did either. RIP Allen Francis Doyle. We all still love you! That's about all you really need to know about me. My life revolves around Buffy and Angel (and the occasional episode of Doctor Who but creating Doctor babble is like creating a Van Gogh painting, it's just not gonna happen). The end. Favourite Buffy Quotes "Seize the moment, 'cause tomorrow you might be dead." - Buffy Welcome to the Hellmouth I like this one because it's just so blunt and Willow's face was hilarious. "I laugh in the face of danger...then I hide until it goes away." - Xander Witch Xander is amazing. It's just the perfect description of his usual self but when he really faces real danger, he's so brave. I love him. "Why should someone want to harm Cordelia?" These lines are so unexpected when they come from Willow so they're always funny. "See, this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things." This joke carries through the three seeason of Buffy's high school years and it's always funny to see a student in the library that's not Buffy or the Scooby Gang. Joss Whedon makes a joke out of something that's amazingly obvious and they do it so well. "Alright, I-I'll just jump in my time machine, go back to the 12th century and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show." "It's bad isn't it?" Another blunt point, delivered perfectly by Anthony Head. This is definitely one of my favourites. It describes teenage guys perfectly. "I'm...I'm just gonna stay and clean up a little. I'll, uh, I'll be back in the middle ages." "To read makes our speaking English good." - Xander I Robot... You Jane One of those amazingly stupid things that Xander says. How can you not love Xander? I mean seriously, come on. "Giles, unto every generation one is born who must run the annual talentless show. You cannot escape your destiny." - Buffy The Puppet Show I love the idea behind this one. Buffy's telling Giles about destiny whereas he's usually telling her about destiny. It's one of those quotes that you never really expect. "I like like spiders, okay? Their furry bodies, and their sticky webs, and what do they need all those legs for anyway? I'll tell you: for crawling across your face in the middle of the night!" - Willow Nightmares Poor Willow. I love how Hannigan delivers this line. It's amazing. "How could you let her go?" "Cordelia, your mouth is open and sound is coming from it. This is never good." Buffy the bitch. I love it when they slag Cordelia. "There's some things I can just smell. It's like a sixth sense." Principal Snyder is very funny. He tries so hard to make his school perfect, but he never, ever wins. And then he gets eaten. What is it with the school prinicpals and getting eaten? "What are you going to do? Crawl inside a cave for the rest of your life?" "Are you crazy? You don't just sneak up on people in a graveyard. You make noise when you walk. You stomp or... yodel." - Buffy Some Assembly Required "Are you jealous?" Poor Angel. She's so mean to him sometimes. I love the fact that he uses her terrible actions against her for once. Angel, if you ever feel that she's just too mean or anything, I'm always available :D "And he broke Cordy's heart? Thus possibly proving its existence." - Buffy Some Assembly Required "Could this get yuckier?" "I wasn't gonna use violence. I don't always use violence... do I?" "Oh! I know this one! Slaying entails certain sacrifices, blah, blah, bity blah, I'm so stuffy, gimme a scone." - Buffy Inca Mummy Girl Haha. Buffy uses Gile's English-ness against him, which, while I think it's a bit mean, it's also very funny. "Well why do you think she went to that party? Because you gave her the brush off! And you, you never let her do anything except work and patrol! And I know she's the Chosen One but you're killing her with the pressure. She's sixteen going on forty! And you! I mean, you're gonna live forever! You don't have time for a cup of coffee?!" - Willow Reptile Boy You tell 'em girl! Willow is such an amazing friend to Buffy, standing up for her when others are against her. I wish all my friends were like that. "True. It's too bad we can't sneak a look at the Watcher diaries and read up on Angel. I'm sure it's full of fun facts to know and tell." "The Lonely Ones?" "I'm aerobicising! I must have a beat!" Ah Giles. You always come up with some amazing lines. "What, and suck all the spontaneity out of being young and stupid? I'd rather live in the dark." Too right you will Xander. But you'll always be lovable too. "Uh, we're having this thing at school." I love that Angel's not at all ashamed to admit his tendancies to lurk occasionally. "Vampires are creeps." This was an excellent rant. I feel for her. "Yeah, destroying the world. Great. I'm really more interested in the Slayer." "Dear Buffy. I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards." Spike and Angel/Angelus' rivallry was an amazing theme throughout season 2 and again in season 5 of Angel. They had some pretty cool fights. "Willow, I figured I might take in a class. Figured I could use someone who knows where they are." - Buffy (episode unknown) The writers were very smart to use this line. It shows that they also acknowledge that we very, very rarely see Buffy in a class past season 1. I think Sarah Michelle does a great job of delivering it. "Flowers for milady." "Homework?" I love how her friends give Buffy presents that you wouldn't really expect. Okay, Xander gives her balloons, but at least he makes it funny, and you would never expect anyone but Willow to give you homework as a get well soon present. "It's about time our school excelled at something." "Just tell me what I need to know." Giles is so brave. Even after he's been kidnapped and tortured by Angelus, he still won't tell him how to destroy the world. I want him. "Well, it's sort of a funny story. You remember when I didn't graduate?" The Willow and Oz pairing is adorable. I find it amusing that they both have red hair. They both love each other so much. It's very cute. "What's the plan?" "Unbelievable. 'Do you like my mask? Isn't it pretty? It raises the dead!' Americans!" - Giles Dead Man's Party "Generally speaking, when scary things get scared: not good." - Xander Dead Man's Party With you there Xander. RUN! "And then I was being chased by an improperly filled in answer bubble screaming 'none of the above!'" Haha. I can't remember where I heard this one, all I can remember is that I found it very funny. Buffy fights evil and saves the world but she still gets scared by school work. "Oh... my head. I think I'm sobering up. It's horrible. Oh, God. I wish I was dead." "They're confiscating my books!" "My mom said some things to me about being the Slayer. That it's fruitless. No fruit for Buffy." "Willow, you're alive?" "Willow's dead... hey Willow... wait a second." Vampire Willow was awesome, though I'm with Willow when she says that she's a little bit gay. Predictions of the future perhaps? The gang's faces when they saw that Willow was alive as well as a vampire were priceless. "You don't have to play games with me Buffy." "(thinking) What am I going to do? I thin about sex all the time. Sex. Help. Four times five is 30. Five times six is 32. Naked women. Naked girls. Naked Buffy. Oh stop me!" I can quote this one off by heart. I love it. Xander is a funny guy. Where can I get one? "Well, you know, I have a choice. I can spend my life waiting for Xander to go out with every other girl in the world until he notices me. Or I can just get on with my life." "Now is it time to have a talk about the facts of life?" "You took a bath." "You know, Buffy, Spring Fling just isn't any dance. It's a time for students to choose, um, a mate. And then we can observe their mating rituals, and tag them before they migrate... just kill me!" - Xander Prophecy Girl "How will I know what to wear?" "You're not a preying mantis are you... sorry, someone else." - Xander Inca Mummy Girl Xander's love life really didn't go too well for a while there. Preying Mantis, Mummy, Bitch of the Year, Ex Demon. Willow's right. He is a demon magnet. "It is kind of novel how he'll stay young and handsome forever, although you'll still get wrinkly and die... and oh, what about the children? I'll be quiet now." - Willow "I was brought up a proper lady. I wasn't meant to understand things. I'm just meant to look pretty, and then someone nice will marry me. Possibly a baron." - Buffy Halloween Never dressing up for halloween again. There's no way I want to turn into a ghost the way Willow did. Good line though. "So, you've been seeing a guy, but you don't know what he looks like. Okay, this is a puzzle. No, wait, I'm good at these. Does it involve a midget and a block of ice?" - Buffy I Robot... You Jane I've watched this episode so many times, and only now do I actually understand this joke. I'm not generally this slow, trust me. Unless they're crude jokes. I can be a bit slow on crude jokes...anyway, let's continue. "You're not like other boys at all. You are totally and compeltely, one of the girls!" - Buffy Witch "Did anyone ever tell you you're kind of a fuddy duddy?" "The Council is not welcome here. I have no time for orders. If I need someone to scream like a woman I'll give you a call." - Buffy (episode unknown) "I hate it when they drown me." - Buffy Go Fish Funny because of the Master and her drowning back then. Go Fish was a pretty cool episode. Xander without a shirt. Very pretty. "I haven't processed everything yet. My brain isn't really functioning on the higher levels. It's pretty much fire bad; tree pretty." - Buffy Graduation Day Part 2 Amazing episode. The Mayor being all snake like and awesome. I think Giles was a bit sad that he had to blow up his library, but at least he got most of his books out. I was crying when Angel left. I love Angel. He's cool. He broods! :D "I don't want any trouble. I just want to be alone and quiet in a room with a chair and a fireplace and a tea cozy. I don't even know what a tea cozy is, but I want one." - Buffy Anne Who doesn't want a tea cosy? I don't know what they are either, but I'm with you there Buffy. "Giles, there are two things that I don't believe in: coincidence and leprechauns." - Buffy (episode unknown) Being part Irish, I can't decide whether to be insulted or not. Leprechauns are real! "I'm getting better, honest. In fact, from here on, you're going to see a drastic distraction reduction. Drastic distraction reduction... try saying that ten times fast." - Buffy (episode unknown) "You know, nothing's really going to change. The important thing is that I kept up my special birthday tradition of gut-wrenching misery and horror." - Buffy Innocence "Aren't you going to introduce me to your... Holy God you're Willow!" - Buffy Doppelgangland My reaction would have been ten times more surprised but Buffy's face was definitely a Kodak moment. "Sure. We can work out after school. That is, if you're not too busy having sex with my mother!" - Buffy Earshot "You said it was big. You told me. But you never said it was huge!" - Buffy (episode unknown) "Apparently Buffy has decided that problem with the English language is all those pesky words. You... Angel... big... smoochies?" There are more, but I'll just gradually put them up as I go Favourite Angel Quotes - No comments "[as Rachel, falsetto] How can I thank you, you mysterious, black-clad, hunk of a night thing? "I'm a rogue demon hunter now." "I've been accused of a great many things in my time but paranoid has never been one of them. Unless people have been saying it behind my back. Angel, you don't think I'm especially paranoid do you?" "I'm not crazy, I'm telling you I saw her." "Instead, you're moping around the dark like some kind of..." "I'm not good at this...talking." - Angel Lonely Heart "I can go wherever I want and...you can go to hell." "Hello L.A." "Please, I couldn't get comfortable here if the floor was lined with mink. I mean, how can you live like this?" There are more, but, like Buffy, I'll just gradually put them up as I go. Just some random stuff I've found on profiles I'm not crazy.I'm psychotic.There's a difference. I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy evey minute of it. There's nothing that can't be fixed by:A)duct tape B)chocolate or C)running it over.I prefer option C, but I'll take option B if necessary. The reason I'm still here is because Heaven doesn't want me,and Hell's afriad I'll take over. Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday. Don't get mad;Get sadistic. My mind isn't twisted, it's sprained. Common sense is the enemy of comedy. Sarcasm isn't an attitude, it's an ART. My attention span is just short enough to annoy you and ignore you at the same time. Knowledge is power; Power is the root of all evil. Therefore study evil and excel at it. What is this 'kindness' you speak of? Why don't you slip into something comfortable; like a coma. I will gladly help you. Define 'normal'? When in doubt...throw a chair. If the opposite of pro is con, what's the opposite of progress? Only two things are infinite:1) The universe 2) Human stupidity. There are few problems that cannot be solved with large amounts of explosives. Boys don't fall for me; I trip them. It's always darkest before dawn...so if your gonna steal your neighbour's newspaper thats the time to do it. Keep smiling; It makes people wonder what your up to. Catch a man a fish, and you sell it to him. Teach a man to fish and you ruin a wonderful business opportunity. Art, like morality, consists in drawing the line somewhere FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella in the rain. FRIENDS: Bail you outta prison. FRIENDS: Help you up when you fall. FRIENDS: Are offended when you make fun of them. FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail. FRIENDS: Will tell you forget it when you want to vandalize somebody's house. FRIENDS: Think you're insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline. FRIENDS: Will look at you like you're crazy when you tell them your an alien from outer space. FRIENDS: Will crack under interrogation. My best friend is insane. If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, copy this into your profile! Anyone can write. But to capture an audience with so much power, spirit and feeling that they forget everything around them - that is a true gift. I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. I can forgive, and I can forget, but I want you to know, you've lost my respect. Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps, for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between how things are and how they ought to be. I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not. He who laughs last thinks slowest. Reeses Pieces, Coco Puff, mess with me; I’ll fuck you up. Got a problem with me? Solve it. Think I’m trippin’? Tie my shoes. Can’t stand me? Sit down. Can’t face me? Then turn the fuck around! Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes If I were trapped in a single room with two tigers, you, and a gun with two bullets I'd shoot you twice. Someone call Toys R Us, they want their Barbie back It looks like you fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Mirrors can't talk and you're lucky they can't laugh Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty, what the heck happened to you? I refuse to engage in a battle of wits! I will not take advantage of the handicapped! If you hear voices in you head, copy this to your profile If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile. If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you know someone (Or more than one someone!) who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile. If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. If you've ever talked/sang to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If your weird, insane, crzy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar copy this into your profile. If your crazy and proud of it, copy this onto your profile. If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. If there are times when you just want to annoy people for the hell of it... copy and paste this into your profile. There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird... Copy and paste this into your profile if you agree. If you have your own little world copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever felt the undenilable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile. If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile. If you've ever seen a movie so many time you can quote it word for word, copy this to your profile. If you have ever burst out laughing at something in a book, copy this to your profile. If you have a tendancy to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which means the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud copy and paste this to your profile. There's nothing wrong arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Willowfae, SxAmethyst, Sia Bakura, Balmung's Angel, Ash 2112, XDVanilla, Little Prue, GhostAuthor, Mirany Hunter. If.. Best ever saying When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it. If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving. If at first you don't succeed,destroy all evidence you tried. Sometimes a road less traveled is less traveled for a reason. When you cry, I'll cry, you laugh, I'll laugh, you fall down a ski slope, I'll laugh even harder. Forgive your enemies,but remember their names. Don't piss off an Anger Management Class drop-out. If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo. Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking. The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not. We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police. They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room? Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs. The next time someone says "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me " HIT THEM WITH A DICTIONARY! Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing. I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier. My reality check bounced. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at. Stress: The condition brought on by overriding the body's desire to kick someone's ass. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. If my music’s too LOUD, then you’re too OLD.(That's for you DAD!) It takes 42 muscles to frown, but just 28 muscles to smile. Though it only takes 4 muscles to reach out and slap someone across the face. I met some crazy people. They made me their leader! I'm crazy enough to kill, but that's not your problem. The problem is that I'm also smart enough to get away with it. Silence is golden, duct tape is silver. Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over. 1. When you are sad, I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard. YOUR GUY SIDE: YOUR GIRL SIDE: I can't be a girl. Why on earth am I a girl? Lol. This is totally my mother, through and through 1. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 2. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 3. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." 4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 6. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about." 7. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?" 9. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 10. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." 11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" 12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." 13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!" 14. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." 15. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home." 16. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!" 17. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." 18. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" 19. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 20. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 21. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 22. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?" 23. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand." 24. My mother taught me SHAPE-SHIFTING. "You'll turn into a sausage if you eat any more." 25. My mother taught me CONSEQUENCES. "If you don't tidy your room, there'll be hell to pay." 26. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." TIME FOR A MATH LESSON From a strictly mathmatecal viewpoint What makes 100 percent? What does it mean to give MORE than 100 percent? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100 percent? We all have been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over one hundred percent. How about acheiving 103 percent? What makes up 100 percent in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions; If: Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11= 98 percent and K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5= 96 percent but A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 =100 percent and, B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20= 103 percent and look how far this one will take you, A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7= 118 percent! So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while HARDWORK and KNOWLEDGE will get you close, and ATTITUDE will get you there, its really the BULLSHIT and ASSKISSING that will put you over the top. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, Tigress5674, sistersgrimmaddict,gothicgirl101, Lupa Dracolis,GhostAuthor, Mirany Hunter poem: Do not stand at my grave and weep IF YOU THINK THAT DAVID TENNANT IS GOD'S GIFT TO WOMAN KIND, COPY AND PASTE THIS TO YOUR PROFILE! AND GET IN LINE, AND HANDS-OFF TOO, THAT MAN'S MINE! Challenges What I would love to see but will never write: Doctor Who/Angel crossfic- It makes perfect sense, demons are aliens or whatever. The glorious thing about the Doctor is you really don't have to make sense. Onto the rules...yes. You must obey the laws of the universe. 1. You can use whichever Doctor you prefer, but he either must remember being there before, or sense another Time Lord has been there. This may not be the main plot. 2. No, the Angel crew may not know the Doctor is an alien, or that aliens exist. This is a secret that may not be revealed by the Doctor, though they can suspect he is a demon, and he can be "revealed" as one. 3. If the Doctor remembers being there, he must remember seeing Angel and vice versa. 4. You story must contain four out of five of this list: 1.) an alien fish vampire (remember them?) 2.) a talking cactus 3.) a hobo who plays a major part 4.) a child seer, who can be only physically one chapter but may haunt anyone of your choosing 5.) a potato man holding a coke and exactly 42 cents. 5. Your story must be more than 5 chapters, but less than 27. Good luck with that. This one, if you do do, I will favorite automatically and subscribe, just so I can see if anyone will do it. Angel oneshot- Mission: Try to get Angel drunk. Rules: 1. Since he has no heart to pump alcohol through his bloodstream...it might take a while... 2. It cannot be at the Caratas. 3. At some point, someone he knows must show up. It can be anybody, but they must stay for the rest of the duration. 4. Give him a reason for wanting to get drunk, but it cannot be because he is depressed. 5. To get home, he must take public transportation. 6. He must get robbed by a hobo. 7. He must wake up with a cabbage patch doll in his pocket, Peachy Lovva written in marker across his face, and a tattoo of your choice on a body part of your choice and a vague of idea of how two of the three got there. ULTIMATE crossover challenge- I don't mean like most epic, I mean like, the most crossovers you can get in a 250 word one shot. 1. Each tv show/book/movie may only be mentioned once. 2. The main character must be you. 4. You must come up with a scientificky reason for it all happening. 3. You may not let it all descend into chaos. 5. You're first sentence must be, "And then the orange banana rolled under the truck and" finish the sentence. Ha, good luck. IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART. Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school Please copy this onto your profile and send a email around if you can for all those 'people that didn't get to say goodbye.' I only know how to do things three ways: the right way, the wrong way, and my way… which is the wrong way only faster. To catch me you got to be fast, to find me you got to be smart, but to be me? Damn you must be kidding... If you get inspired to write at random moments through the day put this on your profile. Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them Don’t knock on death’s door…ring the doorbell and run. He hates that. Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later I'm the kind of girl who looks at Twilight and laughs at the cheesiness. I'm the kind of girl who has a picture of Joe Jonas pasted to my dart board. DIE YOU STUPID JONAS BROTHER! I'm the kind of girl who walks into the Mental Hospital and greets the receptionist bye name. I'm the kind of girl who is willing to drop-kick Twilight books out of my apartment window. I'm the kind of girl who can hold a conversation with you for fifteen minutes and then ask, "What was your name again?" I'm the kind of girl who is considered weird. I'm the kind of girl who would've let Stupid Edward commit suicide. I'm the kind of girl who thinks that Stephenie Meyer and all of her little vampires should be charged with first degree murder for the death of good literature. I'm the kind of girl who doesn't care what you think. I'm the kind of girl who doesn't care if you care what I think because I don't care what you think, so you needn't care what I think and I don't care. I'm the kind of girl who plots against fictional characters. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed. -Silence is golden, duct tape is silver -One day we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject -You know, 1/7 people have fallen of there nut. Look at 6 of your friends, and if they're all good, IT"S YOU! -Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk. They spend the second part telling us to sit down and shut-up -Flying is simple! Just throw your self towards the earth, then miss the ground. -Be insane. Well behaved girls are no fun to read about --If you can't BEAT them, JOIN them If you can't JOIN them, BRIBE them If you can't BRIBE them, BLACKMAIL them If you can't BLACKMAIL them, KILL them If you can't KILL them, your SCREWED --I had a friend once. Then his rope broke and he ran for it -I took the less traveled road... NOW WHERE THE HECK AM I? -DO NOT HIT KIDS!! No, seriously. They have guns now. -before embarking on revenge, dig 2 graves. That way if someone gets in the way, you can dispose of each body quickly RANDOMOSITY: The art of being random. Things that changes color: Leaves Chameleons Fruit Animal coats Flowers Michael Jackson If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever cried when your favorite character in a movie, T.V show, or book died, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do so at random moments, copy and paste this in you're profile. If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile. If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put it on your profile. If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile. If you get way to excited for books, movies, ect. to come out, copy this into your profile If you've ever yelled at an inanimate object for not listening to you, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile. If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer. There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. If you or your best friend is insane copy this into your profile. If you wish Sweets would just break down and admit that Zack is innocent, copy this onto your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile. If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile If you are a geek and proud of it, paste this into your profile If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. If you have ever said ‘cross over to the dark side. We have cookies!’ to someone you know, copy this into your profile If you believe that your computer has a mind of it's own and it hates you, copy this into your profile If you want to KILL Hart Hanson for what he did to Booth and Brennan, then copy this into your profile If you have gone all out and dressed up totally in black, copy this to your profile If you are paranoid that someone is stealing your best friend, copy this to your profile If you got a crush on someone before realizing that they looked like your old crush, copy this to your profile. 97 percent of girls would cry if they saw Justin Bieber standing on top of the world's tallest building, about to jump. If you are, like me, part of the 3 percent that would sit there in a deckchair, with popcorn, and yell "DO A FLIP!" then post this onto your profile. 99 percent of the girl population would immediatley fly to Los Angeles if they had the chance to speak to Robert Pattinson for free. If you, like me, are part of the miniscule 1 that would rather take a free trip to talk to Colin Morgan instead, copy this to your profile This is for the people out there who know me and don't understand me when I say what I feel about gay couples. I'm fine with gay couples guys, I just get uncomfortable when they get all 'coupley' around me. Really, I'm not scared of gay people. Copy and Paste:HOMOPHOBIA IS GAY I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday National Dork Association Grumpyk Chylea3784 Buffyxenaman precious_18 Kimberly Hart Pink Crane kk11819 Mirany Hunter Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen,xGabriellaxBoltonx, xEarlySunsetsOverMonroevillex, Smartest Girl In The World,'rEd RoSe-StArFiRe-RoSeFiRe', Not-a-Tro, Luvs-Mitchel-Musso, Rachel the Loser, BridgeCrazy, Buffyxenaman, Mirany Huntere 93 percent of teens would have an emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're part of the 7 percent who would say, "What was your first clue?" Copy and paste this into your profile. You know you live in 2011 when... 1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave. 2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years 3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screen name, msn or myspace 4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV 6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job. 7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling. 8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends. 9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5. 10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5. 11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile. You Know Your a Massive Bones Fan When... 1. You want to work at the Jeffersonian Institute 2. You're considering becoming a Forensic Anthropologist/FBI Agent/Facial reconstruction artist...you get the idea 3. You say "I don't know what that means..." when you don't get something, then you start laughing even though no body gets it. 4. YOU LOVE PIE! 5. You HATE CLOWNS! 6. You use phrases from the show in everyday life (and then have to explain to people what you're talking about) 7. You talk to your friends about what happened in the latest episodes and get mad when they don't listen to you. 8. You have a Bones folder on your computer that no one dares to touch because you will kill them if they do. 9. You want to be a Brennan so you can find a Booth 10. You think Psychology is stupid OR Psychology is totally awesome 11. Flesh? Ewwww com'on... Bones is so much cooler! 12. You pause the episode when you leave the room even though you've seen it a million times already. 13. You think Booth& Brennan should just DO IT ALREADY!! 14. You want to kill whoever touches/talks/hurts Brennan yet still enjoying watching a jealous Booth 15. You wear fancy socks (and 'Cocky'/weird belt buckles for guys) 16. You get mad because you can't find EXACTLY the same font that they use to print the word "BONES" on the DVDs 17. You want to dress up as Wonder Woman/Clark Kent for Halloween 18. You are on half a dozen "Bones" forums and groups 19. You follow Hart Hanson on Twitter 20. Your friends & family members begin expressing their concern for your mental health 21. You use "Anthropologically speaking..." in sentences 22. You've read all of Kathy Reichs' novels 23. You start to tell to everyone how archaic marriage is. 24. You explain to your couple that anthropologically it's totally right to date two people at the same time... 25. You start to read about Physical Anthropology 26. You say "simmer down" when someone's annoying you or freaking out. 27. You know the names of every single episode, in order, and can tell someone exactly what happened in that episode. EVER WONDER... Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?? Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? -- Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are unconcerned with the dismal state of their education, or the fact that their fanfiction is raping the English language. If you're part of the five percent of fanfiction writers/readers that do care, copy and paste this, and then leave reviews for those poor souls who know not what they do. 95 of teens would cry if they saw the Jonas Brothers at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this EVERYWHERE if you are in the 5 that would shout“Jump, assholes!” If you know there's more to good random humor than saying "FUUUDGE!", "CHEEEESE!" or any variation thereof, copy and paste this into your profile. Guns don't kill people; giant, gaping wounds in vital organs kill people. If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile. If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile. If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile. If you want to fire and/or sue those bloody weather men(or newspaper people) for giving you false hope so often (for snow days or something)...Copy and paste this to your profile, so we know who to call when we lead an angry mob :) If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile. If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile If you've ever burst out laughing in a detention or library or somewhere where it is supposed to be quiet copy and paste this into your profile. If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile. If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile. If someone gave you money for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. ) If you've ever read/started to read a chapter in a fan fiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile. If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever forgotten your own age, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. If you can't figure out if these copy and paste things bug you or if you love them, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you absolutely CANNOT live without one or all of these books series (Harry Potter, Maximum Ride, Twilight), copy and paste this into your profile!Message to the world: The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... bones :) Do you have all of the episode names and order memorized? Yes Can you not help but quote Bones on an hourly basis? Yes Did you start watching Buffy because David Boreanaz is in it? Pretty much Do you feel obligated to introduce everyone you know to the amazingness called Bones? Duh! Do you worship TJ Thyne? Uh huh Do you know Zack's middle name is Uriah? Yes Have you ever considered a career as a forensic anthropologist? I am going to be a forensic anthropologist Have you ever wondered how it's possible for Bones to not have an MD? Yes Do you know exactly what episodes Bones and Booth first hold hands, hug, and kiss? YES! Do you find Bones to be the only show that you can watch the same episodes over and over and NEVER get bored of them? YES Does the number 12402510221 mean anything to you? Yep When someone says dirt, do you picture Hodgins freaking out? Yes Have you become a conspiracy theorist since you started watching? Yes Is it obvious to you that the Jeffersonian is modeled after the Smithsonian? It's so obvious If you think Batman/Joker slash is so insanely hot that your mind implodes at the mere contemplation of such sexy awesomeness, copy this into your profile. If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile. :) I'm bringing sexy back..." Copy and paste this into your profile if you never even knew sexy was gone. If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile. If you're the Scarecrow's mistress of fear, copy and paste this to your profile If you wish Cillian Murphy got more screentime in Batman Begins, copy and paste this to your profile If you cried at Toy Story 3 whilst small children just stared at you, copy and paste this to your profile If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile." .eliforp ruoy otni etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI If you have a tendency to talk to your self, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think Captain Jack Sparrow and Elizabeth Swann--Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean-- are made for each other and that, no matter how wonderfully wonderful Will Turner may be, he should never, under any circumstances, be with Elizabeth, copy and paste this into your profile! If every time you hear the word rum, you automatically think of Captain Jack Sparrow, copy and paste this into your profile!! If you went to save Jack just because you missed him, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever called (or almost called) your school teacher 'mum' or 'dad', copy and paste this onto your profile. If you think Jack should have shot Elizabeth for burning the food the shade and the rum, copy and paste this onto your profile! If you think that Disney films ROCK and can be watched by all ages, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile. If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever had a heart-to-heart conversation with a wall, copy and paste this in your profile. If you wish Christopher Nolan would get his act together and MAKE ANOTHER BATMAN MOVIE ALREADY, copy and paste this into your profile!! If in a quiet room, you're the one who always asks 'Why's it gone all quiet?', copy and paste this onto your profile. If you think that Dr Seuss is a clever man for being able to think up all those rhymes, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you think that The Lion King is the best Disney animated film EVER, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you don't understand why people actualy watch Big Brother, copy and paste this into you profile. Age is mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people. How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? Why does Goofy stand up while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! Last night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I thought to myself... "Where the hell is my ceiling!?" Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive. The trouble with life is that there's no background music. Just because somebody doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. It's not how high are you...it's hi, how are you. Two thirds of Americans can't do fractions. The other half, just don't care. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life. Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege. Don't judge a book by its movie. I must be wishing on someone else's star because it seems someone else is always getting what I wished for. People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do. Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo? Proper punctuation is the difference between a man's laughter and a manslaughter Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t give a damn. This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting. I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant. If I throw a stick, will you leave? I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. I’m trying to imagine you with a personality. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target. Your chances of getting struck by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky, and yell, "Storms suck!" I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no freaking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why isn't notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I'll tell you why: because paper can't beat anybody; a rock would tear that thing up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shoot, I'm sorry. I thought paper would protect you!" This is for all those crazy people out there... For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you act completely, well, crazy and make a total fool of yourself and don’t even care. Crazy is when you dedicate your entire being (every cell in your body) to Eragon, Star Wars, and fanfiction. Crazy is when you go into build-a-bear workshop and walk up to little kids saying "That's my favourite bear" in a creepy voice and then run like heck when their soccer-mums glare at you. Crazy is when you get jacked up on sugar on your school excursion to bush gardens, laugh for two hours straight WHILE riding rollercaosters, then still laugh after you get slapped by your friends, and they pour a cold water on you, and you just stop suddenly, and when they asked why you laughed you say " I felt like it." Crazy is when you claim you can walk on water and then get your best friend to hold you by your waist in the air and you move your legs in a walking movement (It works!!) Crazy is when you fight with your friend over which vegetable you want to be. Crazy is when you say pineapple and then threaten to slap someone if they even mention the word; claiming that it's yours. Crazy is when you have a whole glass of coke in one go and go so hyper you laugh for several hours straight and bounce on your knees on your friend's bed until it breaks (it was an accident okay). Crazy is when you walk up to random people in the swimming pool and do a Rose Tyler impersonation and ask what planet your on. Crazy is when you walk up to someone you've never seen before in the street and sprout some random technobabble that ends with "And that's why you should always carry a banana around with you." Crazy is when you ruin your science exams by answering them using only Gallifreyan numerals and covering it in other random...alien symbols, and then trying to pass it off as legitimate to the Head of Department, by claiming that really, you honestly are a timelady from the planet Gallifrey. Crazy is when you insist on dressing up as Doctor Who characters for an Olympic themed fundraiser, then end up going as an Olympic Torch instead! Crazy is when you can't sit in Physics without nicking the teacher's shaky thing! Crazy is when you do a headstand against you classroom wall and start to sing "By the Sea" from Sweeney Todd. Crazy is when you pretend to swordfight with your freinds, using your fingers as the swords, at a zoo. Crazy is writing a dialog for pictures of animals that fit their expressions. Crazy is drawing the ministers of your church as legos and then pinning up the pictures in your room. Crazy is imagining you are talking to Captain Jack Sparrow before you go to bed. Crazy is buying your mother a build-a-bear for mother's day. Crazy is setting up a tent in your bedroom on the eve of your birthday, and then playing with stuffed animal neopets inside it with your best friend until three in the morning. Crazy is getting into a really deep disscusion with your Dentist thus distracting him from his job. Crazy is nicknaming your Orthodontist "Hunkenstein" (granted not to his face). Crazy is drawing a symbol on the left knee of all your jeans. Crazy is owning a pair of those striped stockings from the Wizard Of Oz. Crazy is eating rocks instead of chewing gum in class. Crazy is turning your room into a Captain's Cabin. Crazy is going into a daycare center that has a play pirate ship in it, and proclaiming yourself captain, thus obtaining the hat, and whipping the new "crew" (a bunch of five year-olds) into shape, and sending crew members who don't follow orders down to the brig, tied up in their own sweaters (hey, no one questions the captain!). Crazy is hollowing out the neighbors hedges into a clubhouse (without their permission) only to get caught and start a family feud. Crazy is not noticing that it was Hugh Laurie that played the dad in Stuart Little until it was pointed out to you. Crazy is crying for a hour straight after Sirius dies in the Order of the Pheonix. Crazy is naming your alter-ego "FIGGERBOTTOM" (it has to be typed in caps, that's very important). If you're crazy and crazy about it, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done too. I can remember about half of these things. I was small and little during the 90's and my memory's pretty shot. It's amazing I remembered any of it You're a 90's kid if: A very, very big stereotype thingo For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.) I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. | |||||||
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