Admit it. You’re lost, aren’t you?
Makes two of us.

“Green was the silence, wet was the light,
the month of June trembled like a butterfly.”

― Pablo Neruda, 100 Love Sonnets

So I'm in college now. I know, miracles do exist; give me a round of applause and throw the confetti. I'm gonna be busy, I think, so yeah. No time for dilly-dally and all that. Totally legit reason, right there.

IMPORTANT NOTICE THAT’S SO IMPORTANT IT’S IN ALL CAPS AND BOLDED TO BOOT. THIS WOULD’VE BEEN UNDERLINED AND ITALICIZED AS WELL, BUT I FIGURED THAT WOULD BE OVERKILL, SO HERE GOES:

If you’re ever planning to read anything I’ve published from 2010-2011 (and heavens help you, why would you want to do that?), please do so with a grain of salt. And a bite of lemon, if you like; it’s a free country. They’re that bad, really. (The stories, not the country.) There’s a big chance they’d burn your eyes right out of their sockets, and you don’t want that. Unless you have a weird burned-eye-socket fetish and you actually find burned eye sockets attractive, in which case you’re free to go ahead and knock yourself out. It might be easier to just squirt that lemon right in your corneas (and the grain of salt, too), but I’m digressing.