PencilMonkeyGaiden
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Joined 12-06-12, id: 4402313, Profile Updated: 08-29-18
Author has written 23 stories for Harry Potter, Discworld, Monkey Island, Worm, Warhammer, Sherlock Holmes, and Dungeons and Dragons.

Hello!

You can also find my stories on SpaceBattles, under the username "PencilMonkey".

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The Perils of Innocence by avidbeader reviews
AU. In an institute to help children with psychological issues, a child is abandoned by his guardians because he does extraordinary things. Rather than fear him, the doctors work to help him try to control this ability. They discover other children with these incredible powers. And then odd letters arrive one summer day. Rating will probably go up later. Eventual H/Hr.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 101,526 - Reviews: 3770 - Favs: 7,185 - Follows: 9,445 - Updated: 4/6 - Published: 8/14/2012 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Harry Potter, Post Script: Heroes and Horrors by midnightephemera reviews
A continuation of the Harry Potter series after the demise of Voldemort. What happens in the 19 years before the epilogue? How do the two new couples deal with new responsibilities and one more year of school before them? (Mostly Canon compliant) Major Edit happening currently, chapters being reposted. Rated M for some violence and other scenes.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 110,958 - Reviews: 413 - Favs: 607 - Follows: 594 - Updated: 12/2/2019 - Published: 4/22/2014 - [Harry P., Ginny W.] [Hermione G., Ron W.]
Monstrous Compendium Online by Vathara reviews
Canon, Kayaba spoke of a vision; of a castle in the sky. In another world, that castle is real... The players of SAO have just signed up for a job interview. Plotting dragon style. Some dragons need to be slain.
Crossover - Dungeons and Dragons & Sword Art Online/ソードアート・オンライン - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 13 - Words: 107,425 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 299 - Follows: 147 - Published: 4/26/2019 - Kirito/Kazuto K. - Complete
The Merging by Shaydrall reviews
To Harry Potter, Fifth Year seemed like the same as any other. Classmates, homework, new dangers, Voldemort risen in the shadows… the usual, even with a Dementor attack kicking things off. But how long can he maintain the illusion that everything is under control? As hope for a normal life slips away through his fingers, will Harry bear the weight of it all... or will it crush him?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 402,897 - Reviews: 4540 - Favs: 10,571 - Follows: 12,441 - Updated: 10/27/2018 - Published: 9/27/2013 - Harry P.
Harry Potter and the Natural 20 by Sir Poley reviews
Milo, a genre-savvy D&D Wizard and Adventurer Extraordinaire is forced to attend Hogwarts, and soon finds himself plunged into a new adventure of magic, mad old Wizards, metagaming, misunderstandings, and munchkinry. Updates monthly.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Dungeons and Dragons - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 74 - Words: 314,214 - Reviews: 6662 - Favs: 6,810 - Follows: 7,679 - Updated: 8/2/2018 - Published: 5/7/2012
Strange Reflections by LeQuin reviews
In the aftermath of the Second Blood War its horrors still haunt the survivors, the country needs to be rebuilt and the last thing Harry Potter needed was a family of Potters from another dimension suddenly appearing.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 138,885 - Reviews: 1423 - Favs: 2,947 - Follows: 1,410 - Updated: 2/11/2017 - Published: 1/4/2017 - Harry P., Hermione G., Ginny W. - Complete
I'm Still Here by kathryn518 reviews
The second war with Voldemort never really ended, and there were no winners, certainly not Harry Potter who has lost everything. What will Harry do when a ritual from Voldemort sends him to another world? How will he manage in this new world in which he never existed, especially as he sees familiar events unfolding? Harry/Multi eventually.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 292,799 - Reviews: 5704 - Favs: 17,764 - Follows: 20,633 - Updated: 1/28/2017 - Published: 9/21/2013 - Harry P., Fleur D., Daphne G., Perenelle F.
Picnic Panic by LeQuin reviews
Hermione is home for an Easter barbecue that her parents are hosting. She's brought her boyfriend and is thoroughly regretting that decision. She calls a dear friend to help with the damage control.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 24,146 - Reviews: 497 - Favs: 3,971 - Follows: 1,220 - Updated: 1/14/2017 - Published: 12/8/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., OC, Dr. Granger - Complete
The Catalyst by lorien829 reviews
A little girl of mysterious origins will become the driving force that will change the very nature of Harry and Hermione's relationship with each other. Moves from canon, disregards epilogue.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 20 - Words: 78,882 - Reviews: 270 - Favs: 446 - Follows: 594 - Updated: 5/10/2016 - Published: 10/10/2013 - Harry P., Hermione G.
0800-Rent-A-Hero by brainthief reviews
Magic can solve all the Wizarding World's problems. What's that? A prophecy that insists on a person? Things not quite going your way? I know, lets use this here ritual to summon another! It'll be great! - An eighteen year old Harry is called upon to deal with another dimension's irksome Dark Lord issue. This displeases him. EWE - AU HBP
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 159,580 - Reviews: 3751 - Favs: 10,901 - Follows: 12,695 - Updated: 12/24/2015 - Published: 4/4/2015 - Harry P.
Thrower of the Dart by Vathara reviews
Avengers. Artemis Fowl. AU for something that could have happened instead of book 6...
Crossover - Artemis Fowl & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 105,632 - Reviews: 350 - Favs: 1,929 - Follows: 698 - Published: 5/6/2015 - Artemis F., Holly S., Iron Man/Tony S., Agent Phil Coulson - Complete
Team 8 by S'TarKan reviews
What if Naruto had been selected for a different team? What if he'd had a different mentor? Who would guess the consequences would be so large?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 276,868 - Reviews: 15198 - Favs: 22,903 - Follows: 20,132 - Updated: 4/23/2015 - Published: 1/1/2006 - Naruto U., Hinata H.
Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Less Wrong reviews
Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 122 - Words: 661,619 - Reviews: 35539 - Favs: 26,470 - Follows: 19,510 - Updated: 3/14/2015 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Nocturnal, or Year of the Cat by forcedInduction reviews
It all started with the Polyjuice Incident. Second-year Harry and Hermione star in a very surreal romantic comedy. Featuring Ron "Lovable Comic Relief" Weasley and Luna "Not Dating Ron in my Stories" Lovegood.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 43,117 - Reviews: 895 - Favs: 2,484 - Follows: 1,585 - Updated: 11/2/2014 - Published: 1/4/2011 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Ron W., Luna L. - Complete
Delenda Est by Lord Silvere reviews
Harry is a prisoner, and Bellatrix has fallen from grace. The accidental activation of Bella's treasured heirloom results in another chance for Harry. It also gives him the opportunity to make the acquaintance of the young and enigmatic Bellatrix Black as they change the course of history.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 46 - Words: 392,449 - Reviews: 7772 - Favs: 15,434 - Follows: 9,468 - Updated: 9/21/2013 - Published: 11/14/2009 - Harry P., Bellatrix L. - Complete
Out of the Darkness: A Jinchuuriki's Tale by S'TarKan reviews
People have asked for a sequel with Riley from There's Always A Way... So I got to wondering what someone with his sarcastic personality would be like in Naruto. Warning: This is darker and grittier.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 48,966 - Reviews: 627 - Favs: 1,100 - Follows: 1,109 - Updated: 12/1/2009 - Published: 8/6/2006 - Naruto U., Hinata H.
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

At Least Endbringers Don't Hyphenate, Thank Merlin reviews
During the Second Task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament, things go wrong for Harry Potter. He'll soon discover that his problems are bigger than he feared... Much, much bigger. (Not to mention ridiculously fast, and impossibly dense.)
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,236 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 32 - Published: 11h
Room For Improvement reviews
Emily learns a new insult. Evidently, most of Brockton Bay's gangs wish they'd never heard of that particular word.
Crossover - Discworld & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,458 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 16 - Published: 9/23/2019
Countdowns Neatly Swept Away reviews
The Wards team of the PRT ENE get an indirect lesson on the importance of Rule Number One.
Crossover - Discworld & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,285 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/17/2019
A Little Trouble in the Big Wahoonie reviews
Sam Vimes is getting really bloody tired of all these loons in silly costumes, and especially this so-called Mr. Spish. (Or whatever he's actually called, when he's so-called.)
Crossover - Discworld & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,712 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 18 - Published: 8/20/2019 - Dorfl, Sam Vimes, Jack Slash
The Cauldron Hallows reviews
In the Wizarding World, countless children were told a morbid tale of three brothers. On Earth Bet, very few people knew the grisly truth behind the famous Triumvirate. Now, the lines begin to blur, as the story of the Hallows begins anew.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,001 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 8/2/2019 - Published: 7/22/2019 - Alexandria, Eidolon, Legend
Para-Pedagogical reviews
A new pupil tries to spark conflict in class. In hindsight, he really shouldn't have tried to cause trouble in Miss Susan's classroom.
Crossover - Discworld & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,012 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/22/2019
The Purloined Legacy reviews
Taylor Hebert's future seems bleak, indeed: No parents, no friends, no super-special parahuman powers. Moving to Britain and living with crazy magic relatives that she never knew about before... That's gotta be worth a try, right? Even if it's all based on a teeny-tiny, itty-bitty... Okay, a HUGE lie.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,487 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 5/6/2019 - Published: 4/30/2019
Press F5 to Fast-Flamel reviews
Harry Potter is yoinked from his home world, and ends up in a video game by accident. BvB duelists, armed cat rebels, fatal bouts of spontaneous nudity, and gaudy pieces of overly-talkative, homicidal, very-nearly-family heirlooms; there's a long list of obstacles he'll need to overcome to make his way home - or at least make it to the end of the next level.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,969 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 4/16/2019 - Published: 10/31/2018 - Harry P., Hermione G., Fleur D., N. Tonks
When a Tri-Wizard Fails, Try Spiders Instead reviews
Taylor learns the hard way that travel broadens the mind – even the bits of your brain that you didn't know you had.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,342 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 3/27/2019 - Published: 3/22/2019
Skiv reviews
Where the falling Entity meets the rising ape, there's bound to be plenty of punes, and plays on Worm. A collection of DiscWorm crossover short stories. The stories will be independent of one another, except when they aren't.
Crossover - Discworld & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,222 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 3/22/2019 - Published: 8/27/2018
Taylor Helbrass, Champion of Tzeentch reviews
Much like the first Helbrass, Taylor never set out to become a Champion of Chaos; much like Pepe Le Pew, Tzeentch just refused to stop messing with her. Blessed (or cursed) with regeneration so powerful that even things nearby can come back to life, she's about to be dropped into awful situations like a spiky harem protagonist.
Crossover - Warhammer & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,226 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 214 - Updated: 3/13/2019 - Published: 12/3/2018 - Skitter
In Vortices of Febrile Dream reviews
Four chortling Powers. Eight winds of magic. One teenage girl. Thirteen has never been a more unlucky number.
Crossover - Warhammer & Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,657 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 3/5/2019 - Published: 2/25/2019 - Beastmen, Daemons, Skitter
Whilst I Linger On Top of the Land reviews
You'll see London, you'll see France, you'll see Taylor Hebert ruling the wizards and witches of Europe with an iron fist and innumerable insects. (Which includes ants, and not just for the sake of rhyming.) ... [AKA Space Whale Patronus Chums]
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 37,581 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 299 - Follows: 451 - Updated: 3/2/2019 - Published: 11/5/2018 - Sirius B., Bellatrix L., Skitter
Lichcraft & Larceny reviews
Pureblood politics are rife with backstabbing and dirty dealings. Safer all round to stick with dungeon-delving: Just clobber monsters over the head, and nick their loot. Nice and simple, right? Of course, even though you don't care about politics, you may find that politics care very much about you. (AU, LiteralGrey!Harry)
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,051 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 2/11/2019 - Published: 1/30/2019 - Harry P., Hermione G., N. Tonks
My Pen-Pal Voldemort reviews
Ascending to claim his rightful place as the cruelest, wickedest Dark wizard in Britain had been, as the Muggles say, easy-peasy. Clawing his way to the top of Brockton Bay's seedy underbelly might finally prove a challenge worthy of Lord Voldemort... But why, oh why, do his most vexing adversaries always turn out to be reckless children with unstylish glasses?
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,312 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 2/5/2019 - Published: 1/14/2019 - Tom R. Jr., Skitter
CYOAD is Unfortunately Not a Typo reviews
Dying was the least of Taylor's problems. Now, her new cutlass is covered in Nazi bite marks, her heartbeat is still out to lunch, her afterlife has turned into a video game, she's bribed Armsmaster with what was almost a stolen library book, her dad got Python'd, and her skeletal second-in-command is demanding a promotion. Oh, and her hair is on fire. Whoops.
Crossover - Monkey Island & Worm - Rated: M - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,690 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 10/31/2018 - Published: 8/27/2018 - Skitter
Lauded Cloud Nine reviews
Harry plays a terrific new game, and gets a mile high score. Taylor behaves like a Skitter in a candy shop, i.e. busy weaponizing all the candy. Snape learns how to make friends and influence space whales. Riley builds a Splatterbird.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Worm - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,402 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 60 - Published: 10/22/2018 - Harry P., Skitter
The Boy-Who-Dungeon-Crawled reviews
Auror Captain Nymphadora Tonks and her rookie partner, Harry Potter, are about to get caught between a rock and a heart place. Even worse, the rock is a homicidal lump of glowing geology that calls itself a "Dungeon Core"... And the heart is another bloody Horcrux.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,953 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 20 - Published: 10/5/2018 - Harry P., N. Tonks
The Compost Heap - Worm Omake reviews
Collection of omake stories written for other Worm fics.
Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,517 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/5/2018
Chin-Waggings of the Shard-Bud Snatchers reviews
A collection of short stories, with a semblance of theme. Warning: Crock-fic (i.e., contains enough crack that you may need a large jar to carry it home.)
Worm - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,552 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/24/2018
Shave or Dye
This is a fanfic of the story There is no Epic Loot here, Only Puns by Stewart92. (The divergence point is some little time after Delta gains her second level boss monster.) Mind you, this story is likely going to end up with even more D&D references than the original, and possibly some quite blatant Discworld content, so it may count as more of a crossover.
Crossover - Discworld & Dungeons and Dragons - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,404 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/27/2018
Brown Monkey presents: A Study in Octarine reviews
A toy monkey, his polar bear friend, and a plastered cast of consulting-detective-wannabes explore the perils of Ankh-Morpork. Turns out that the tentacle monsters from the Dungeon Dimensions aren't half as terrifying as the puns. (This story was written as an audio script pitch for the Brown Monkey podcast; as such, it is very, very silly.)
Crossover - Discworld & Sherlock Holmes - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,866 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 7/13/2015 - Published: 6/30/2015 - Nobby N., Dorfl, Sam Vimes, Vetinari
The Monkey's Potty Potter Drabbles reviews
A collection of random short stories and drabbles set in the Harry Potter universe.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 204 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/12/2014