Ten ways to spoil dinner
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Joined 02-18-08, id: 1503167, Profile Updated: 03-03-20
Author has written 15 stories for Legend of Zelda, Metroid, and Soul Calibur.

Recently went on a spring cleaning of my stories' reviews. Can't do much about the troll reviews that were made on a throwaway account, but I deleted a few anonymous reviews. Along the way I noticed a few people claiming to be me. Since I generally ignored trolls like this in the past, I never noticed. Guess this is something you just have to say on the internet these days:

This is my only active account. Any other account claiming to be me that I do not explicitly acknowledge as a side account is lying. This should be obvious but I've noted that some people are easily fooled into believing lies when it coincides with a particular notion of theirs. So be it.

And I only review on this account and only ever when signed in.


"A well rounded critique is often the most rewarding gift a reader can give. Please use this golden opportunity to offer a well deserved praise and/or tips for improvement."

This quote originates from the old pop-out window FFN used for reviews. It's important to me as a writer and indispensable to me as a reviewer because it emphasizes the necessity for growth and improvement that we as writers should strive for. When you do something well you want someone to notice it, to say you did a good job; and when you do something wrong, you should be willing to listen to criticism and learn from your mistakes. The quote no longer appears when we review.

It's as if a piece of this site died.

I still end my reviews with this quote because it's something that every author on this site should get a chance to read. A review isn't just a place for me to say "plz write more". It's a place for me to communicate in a clear, honest fashion about your work. If I critique your work, don't take it personally. Artists are naturally sensitive about their work, but that is a weakness that you need to overcome if you ever want to become better at your craft. Keep writing, keep growing.


With that said, this is a profile, so you are probably wondering who I am. Most people on this site just call me Ten. Where'd this penname come from? Well, when I was younger, I was attempting to make my penname also an acronym. I failed miserably but in the process threw together a cobbled mess of words that sounded funny. It stuck with me. Ten ways to spoil dinner.

I'm not as young as I used to be, but the name remains the same. I've been on FFN for over twelve years, even if I wasn't always active. I've been a writer (though looking at the work I had posted, I am severely underwhelmed), a reviewer, a forum goer, and many things in between. This site, in an odd way, became integral to my growth as an individual, and I don't think that I'll be going away permanently for quite some time. I'm too damn stubborn for that. And looking back, I can see why. I have made some particularly strong connections over this site. I still talk with friends I met five, six, even eight years ago. Those kinds of friendships leave a mark.

And I suppose it would only be appropriate that I mention the Literate Union. That is perhaps what I am most likely known for, having been a part of the LU for... less time than one would think, but quite some time. I had some wonderful times with the LU, I met most of my online friends there, but looking back I can't say everything done by that group was ethical, moral, or forgivable. Though I tried to refrain from the worst actions - I never flamed - that doesn't mean I was always an angel. I'm not going to make some shpeel about how sorry I am. Unless you're someone I wronged, and to be honest my memory isn't clear enough to pick out any individuals, the apology would be nothing more than an attempt to assuage my guilt. Lucky for me, I don't feel that guilty. I'm an optimist. I know I did some bad things, and I've done my best to learn from those mistakes. Whether I am forgiven or not isn't up to me and I won't cry into the valley hoping to hear some magnanimous response.

I'd like to do more good on this site. It'll help my writing improve and I always need some goals. I've some ideas, and when those ideas are fleshed out I'll spill my guts. For now, if you're reading this, I hope you're having a good time reading the words of a self-aware ego maniacal pervert. I've grown a bit, but I'm still the same ol' Ten underneath it all.


On Rule Violations and Reporting

I'll keep this brief and simple. If I happen to find or hear about a rule infringing story, I will check it out. If the author is aware that their story breaks the rules and does not plan on taking the story down, I'll simply report the infraction and be on my way. If they do not, I will warn them that their story may be taken down by the site if they do not take it down themselves. I then give them time to do so before reporting the infraction.

It's a simple system.


Current Projects

Vestigial: Post-Fusion Metroid fic. Hiatus. Still plan to finish this. One day. Currently working on original projects.


If you have any questions, or just want to talk, feel free to PM me or find me on any forum I happen to be frequenting. See you, Space Cowboys.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Inheritance by Cuofeng reviews
After the fall of Phaaze and the end of the X-plague the galaxy was at peace. But as Samus wandered out at the edges of space, whispers came to her of something new: an ancient discovery, a Space Pirate force bearing down on a Federation outpost, and a fight brewing in the bones of the silent Chozo empire.
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 146,098 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 12/30/2019 - Published: 7/20/2017 - Complete
Reflection And Other Short Stories by EeveeNicks reviews
With the Chozo Council all cloistered in a meeting and no training scheduled that day, a ten year old Samus tries to entertain herself on Zebes. Nine years later, Samus hunts her first bounties. Then, an older Samus returns from a mission-gone-bad. A series of drabbles and one-shots set throughout Samus's life. All in the "Human Series" AU
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,540 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/1/2018 - Published: 8/25/2017 - Samus A.
Zero Host by EeveeNicks reviews
When she had set out to accompany a group scientists to SR-388, Samus Aran had never imagined the mission would end in her going rogue and blowing up the planet and BSL station. Now a wanted fugitive, Samus must fight new enemies within the Federation itself. She'll discover the insidious depths of their bioweapon projects, including the mysterious "Zero Host" weapon experiment.F/F
Metroid - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 43 - Words: 165,269 - Reviews: 179 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 10/19/2017 - Published: 2/5/2017 - [Samus A., OC] Adam, C. Dane - Complete
Recursion Complex by Doctor Supernova reviews
Once a beloved hero and living legend, the Hunter has been turned into the Hunted by the people she tried to protect. When she abandons the Galactic Federation as a fugitive in search of asylum, she and her few remaining allies are drawn into a mysterious space station where chaos reigns and specters of the past hide.
Metroid - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,482 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 9/6/2017 - Published: 7/10/2017 - Samus A., Adam, M. Bergman, A. Higgs
Human by EeveeNicks reviews
Samus struggles with civilian life after the destruction of Zebes. Adam accompanies her when she accepts a mission from a mysterious woman. While the work seems simple, the pay seems suspiciously generous, and this mission will take Samus into territory completely alien to her: Earth, where she will find a secret group bent on the destruction of human-alien hybrids. Sort of AU
Metroid - Rated: M - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 34 - Words: 85,000 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 5/11/2016 - Published: 12/28/2015 - Samus A., Adam M. - Complete
The Guardian Saga: Shattered Peace by Stormsworder reviews
Three years after the events of Twilight Falls, Hyrule Castle has been rebuilt and Zelda is finally going to become queen. But things soon fall apart as war threatens to engulf the land... Chapter 7 up. Please read and review.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 8 - Words: 19,208 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/18/2012 - Published: 1/26/2010 - Zelda
The Four Phantoms by Fraggranark reviews
An apocalypse themed one-shot, my winning entry for Hobart's AICon. Hyrule lies in ruin, and the King of Evil gazes down upon the world he so desired with only the company of the awakened Hero. Neither plans to let it remain that way for long.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,099 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/21/2012 - Link, Ganondorf - Complete
It smelled like an Ed, at least by The Sage of Toads reviews
An Ed, Edd and Eddy one-shot alternate ending of one of the most FRUSTRATING episodes of the series.
Ed, Edd n Eddy - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,792 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 236 - Follows: 47 - Published: 10/13/2011 - Complete
Remnants Of A Dying Rose by stardust-bones reviews
Zelda-centric drabble set during TP. "It was nights like this- frost-bitten, starless, desolate, twilight-drenched nights- that she missed Link the most." Zelink.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,528 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/19/2010 - Zelda, Link
The Midnight Hour by stardust-bones reviews
Link dreams of the evil Ganondorf and realizes who he truly is. One-shot.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,998 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Link, Ganondorf
Apples Equals Cyanide Equals Light by Silver Pard reviews
Ryuk’s favourite equation. It means the death of boredom, the only death that actually matters. Gift fic for Computerfreak101
Death Note - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,727 - Reviews: 163 - Favs: 969 - Follows: 206 - Updated: 12/12/2009 - Published: 12/9/2008 - Ryuk, Light Y. - Complete
The Guardian Saga: Twilight Falls by Stormsworder reviews
TP-era. When Twilight falls on Hyrule Castle, a young girl's only family is transformed into dark beasts serving Zant, and it is up to her to fight to save them from the darkness. Please R&R. Finished.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 30 - Words: 75,052 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/25/2009 - Published: 1/13/2009 - Zelda - Complete
Dry Hope by Superbleh11 reviews
A young Ganondorf, King of the Gerudos, reflects on the dire situations of his homeland and dreams of a brighter future. Gives insight to the factors that could have led him to become the King of Evil. Nabooru x Ganondorf centric, pre OoT.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,527 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10/29/2009 - Ganondorf, Nabooru - Complete
Agents of Chaos by Shadsie reviews
Based on the very first Zelda game. While captive in the roots of Death Mountain, young Princess Zelda has a surprising conversation with Ganon that sheds light on his character, the roles of the Hero and herself, and the history of the world.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,794 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 16 - Published: 12/22/2008 - Ganondorf, Zelda - Complete
Rewrite by Silver Pard reviews
"If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice." The Joker shuffles the deck and makes himself anew with every card.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,115 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 405 - Follows: 41 - Published: 8/4/2008 - The Joker - Complete
The War by Talon88.1 reviews
Last Dragon. Chozo Hatchling. A hatred that spans the years, the galaxy, and the battles. Formed by tragedy, fueled by anger, cemented by action, it must be put aside if anything that they care for is to survive the coming war. Let a new chapter begin...
Metroid - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 23,703 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 6/21/2008 - Published: 11/5/2007
Deja Vu by xXMoonlight ShadowXx reviews
Generations may pass, but there are some things that just don't change. NabsxGan, AU oneshot
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,658 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Published: 3/26/2008 - Ganondorf, Nabooru - Complete
Steeped in Fearful Armor by Marching Madly Onward reviews
Ganondorf Dragmire considers a great many things. His people, his past, his ambitions, and more... Behold the King of Evil. Behold a man.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,690 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 259 - Follows: 49 - Published: 9/7/2007 - Ganondorf - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Vestigial reviews
After the events of Metroid Fusion, Samus is brought in for the illegal destruction of the Biologic Space Lab and planet SR388. Given a clandestine mission to secure her innocence, Samus finds herself at the mercy of an enemy more powerful than any she had ever known: a Chozo warlord intent on ending Galactic Civilization.
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 31,030 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 2/4/2019 - Published: 7/3/2017 - Samus A., Adam, OC
Fairy at 35 reviews
Tingle has always wanted to find his fairy home.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,501 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/11/2012 - Tingle - Complete
Invictus Venator reviews
Discontinued. See Vestigial.
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,266 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/30/2012 - Samus A., Adam M., A. Higgs, Ridley
Adventures in Grooseland reviews
After Groose follows Link into Faron, Link has some words to say to him. Bit of a drabble. Challengefic.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,106 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/15/2012 - Link, Groose - Complete
Moblins are Trolls reviews
There was a reason no one dared near the forest temple. It was big reason. An ugly one, too. They were moblins, but they were so grotesque that most people just referred to them as trolls.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,265 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/9/2010 - Link, Navi - Complete
Ever Obedient reviews
This one person's defiance- this will to be against him- caused a stir within Ganon. He didn't know who this girl was, but he had to have her.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,868 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/1/2010 - Ganondorf, Nabooru - Complete
Princesses Don't Believe in Fairy Tales reviews
There are no happy endings. Zelda would learn this the hard way.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,965 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/27/2010 - Zelda - Complete
Awaiting Link reviews
A story about what characters are doing while Link is busy being a hero somewhere else.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,508 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 2/9/2010 - Sheik
Moratorium of Memory reviews
Discontinued.
Crossover - Legend of Zelda & Metroid - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,678 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/18/2009 - Link, Samus A.
The Bearer of Evil Seeds reviews
Discontinued.
Crossover - Legend of Zelda & Soul Calibur - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,063 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 4/2/2009 - Link, Tira
Creeping Death reviews
Though he fights bravely, how can Link be sure that he shall win?
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 191 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/8/2009 - Link, Ganondorf - Complete
Disposable Heroes reviews
Ganon's perspective on the 'Hero' that is meant to beat him. That Disposable Hero.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,466 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 8 - Published: 5/4/2009 - Ganondorf, Link - Complete
Metroid: Their Greatest Weapons reviews
Discontinued. See Vestigial.
Metroid - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,541 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/1/2009 - Published: 4/21/2009 - Samus A., Ridley
The Legend of Zelda: To Smite a God reviews
Discontinued.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,726 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 4/2/2009 - Published: 3/21/2009 - Link, Ganondorf
In the Eyes of Evil reviews
No one could stop Ganon. Not the hero, not the princess, and certainly not the goddesses.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,428 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/14/2009 - Ganondorf - Complete
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