"i want to control who lives and who dies." - crow t. robot

tumblr: @koolaidcowboy

ao3: kool_aid_cowboy

howdy m8!! i'm polski-doodle and i'm glad you're here at this moment in time. congratulations on being born in the same time-frame as me and having completed all the specific events in life that have led you to this page. you're doing a great job existing. keep up the good work!!

you probably like hetalia if you're here. i'm actually ex-hetalia. i haven't interacted with hetalia at all since middle school. the reason i'm still writing fanfiction for it is a.) i feel like i have a duty to finish things i've started, b.) writing hetalia fanfiction is where my writing career began, and c.) i have worked with these characters for so long that they have lost their original shapes and i've melded them into my own beings. they're polski-doodle's characters now :)

this whole fanfiction thing has been my testing grounds for everything. this is how i learned to write. this is where i learned to take criticism and develop decent plots. this is where i met someone i care a whole lot about. i can't abandon it without finishing what i've started.

i like a lot of other things too, but i'm not going to list them all here. that would take too long, and you'd get bored and stop reading. i'm assuming you already have. if you haven't, hi again. thanks for pulling through. you're a real champ.

here are 13 neato facts that you don't have to read and frankly, i'm wasting my time typing them:

1. i don't like capital letters, mostly for the ａｅｓｔｈｅｔｉｃ. don't worry, i still use them when i write
2. my favorite hetalia characters are finland, bulgaria, and latvia (not in that particular order)
3. i really like the late 70s to early 90s aesthetic
4. i miss a lot of things. so do you. it's okay, we have to let things go to keep moving forward and someday you will find something else to fill the space of what you miss. i promise
5. yo prince was such a good musical artist and it's a shame he died. i would die 4 u, prince rogers nelson
6. i went to finland once. it was pretty cold. got stuck on suomenlinna. 5/5 stars on yelp
7. the best queen song is "good old-fashioned lover boy" and i'll defend this until i die
8. the great comet closed too early and i'm bitter about it to this day
9. i've been writing since 5th grade and anything from before sophomore year (2017) is not good. that does not mean that i am any better now. it's simply a fact
10. i was that asshole kid who put the "u" in favorite because i was in that phase where i thought british english was cool. i was wrong. i think numbers from poland, for those below, and air raid sirens have this quirky little trait and i'm sorry
11. vincent van gogh was murdered!
12. i make a lot of errors when i write because i'm doing this without a beta (no beta, we die like men) and i am also a human

don't be afraid to reach out to me. if you want to. i'm much less of a jerk than i appear to be.

good morning/afternoon/night and goodbye!!

playlist corral

because is stupid, you have to delete the space between the open. and the rest for these to work. i'm sorry there's no better way

let the dead be dead

vladimir: open. /playlist/2RUFiK3aRisepLQ5gZPZ0J

kosta : open. /playlist/7uFHmOXfokYUuq3MV09AJo

don't know what story to read?? don't like reading the actual summaries i worked so hard on?? here's some blunt summaries i made specifically for you:

Numbers from Poland (being rewritten under a new title, Retrograde): i made lithuania the villain instead of russia, i let the germany is hre theory run rampant, and it's all set in a flawed, poorly excecuted WWIII setting. if you can't tell, i don't like this one very much. you might like it, though!

For Those Below: i like mumford and sons!! i like angst!! i like aushun!! this is a sad aushun oneshot about mental illness. at the time i wrote this, i did not understand mental illnesses or german. my apologies.

Air Raid Sirens in the Key of F Major: a big wwii human au mess. featuring fun things like a stalag, sabotage groups, alcoholism, death, and lots and lots of dialogue. my biggest story as of 7/21/18. i hate it significantly less now that i'm done writing it.

Let the Dead Be Dead (new!! shiny!! in progress!!): a human au featuring romania accidentally getting moldova seriously injured, the ghost of a bulgarian soldier, the intricacies of being human, and the uncertainty of 1990 bucharest. freshly rewritten for your viewing pleasure

A Grain of Sand in the Indifferent Ocean: a human au about tolys writing a story and everything going horribly wrong in the background, set in 1970's moscow. M rated for its more mature themes (sexual abuse, drug use, violence)

“what is done in love is well done" - vincent van gogh

"you can't ever be really free if you admire somebody too much. i know." - snufkin