I have been diagnosed
with Obsessive Cullen
Disorder. Put this on your
profile if you have it too.

I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
When a Volvo drives through town
I promise to obey traffic laws
Of course for Charlie's sake
And whenever a wolf howls,
I promise to remember Jake
I promise to remember Carlisle
When ever I am in the Emergency Room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to remember Rose
Whenever I see someone that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful curly hair
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my emotions are unfurled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know

At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping it all over his lap.

When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.

When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion. You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.

When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp. You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug. You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You thanked him by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked him by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you how deeply he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him . You thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their children.

And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder on your heart.

If you love your dad, post this on your profile.

Month One

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

When life give you lemons, shut up and eat your damn lemons

I was going to kill the ugliest person alive but then i thought I'd let your mom live one more day

Karin so fat even Naruto don't believe it!

Smile. It makes the world wonder what you're up to.

There are two things that are infinite. The universe and human stupidity. And I'm not so sure about the universe.

Out of my mind. Be back in five minutes.

Normality will be restored as soon as we figure out what it is.

You always get whats coming to you; unless it gets lost in the mail.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver. I guess I can settle for second place.

They say guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG!" i don't think you'd kill many people

Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is.

I have animal magnetism-- when I go outside, squirrels stick to my sleeves.

The trouble with real life is that there is no background music

I have not lost my mind; its backed up on a disk somewhere

Beware the letter 'G'. It is the end of everything.

Forecast for tonight: darkness

If you try to fail and succeed, which one did you do?

I am reading a most interesting book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

How come when you mix water with flour, you get glue and then when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go?

If everything seems to be going well, you obviously overlooked something

There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line

I'm not random I just have many thoughts

I'm the kind of person who walks into a chair and apologizes

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

-sticks hand in electric box- CHIDORI!!

If you had a life you would stop talking about mine

We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever, you keep on talking

The below statement is true

The above statement is false

Heaven doesn't want me there and Hell knows I'll take over.

Don't make me angry, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies

Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy? Take him into a round room and tell him to sit in a corner.

People are like slinkies. Basically useless and yet its so amusing to watch them fall down stairs

In a world of cheerios, be a frootloop!

Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later.

God must love stupid people...he made so many

There is no great genius without a mixture of madness

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

You, you, and you panic. The rest of you follow me.

Lately the only thing keeping me from becoming a serial killer is my dislike for manual labor.

PMS: Every woman's legal right to be a bitch.

Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them as much

If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with nonsense

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice, lay back, and let the world wonder how you did it.

I'm mature and you're not. Nah nah nah nah nah nah!

Eat healthy. Work right. Die anyway.

I have a dream and in it, something eats you.

Its sad your own mom dresses you like that.

Everyone is beautiful on the inside. If you think bones and guts are beautiful.

Its always funny until someone gets hurt. Then its hysterical

My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems

If aliens are looking for intelligent life, why the hell are you scared?!

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

I met Nicole Richie!! No wait, that might've been a twig...

Looking for a perfect girl? Go buy yourself a barbie doll.

If idiots could fly this place would be an airport.

I know KUNG-FU and 42 other dangerous words

Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhh its a secret!

Quick, whats the number for 9-1-1?

You should always proofread what you write in case you any words.

I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap out a better conversation than you.

I ran into my ex today. Then I put it in reverse and hit him again.

By the time you finished reading this you'll realize you just wasted 5 seconds of your life

I burst laughing out in class today...I got that joke you told yesterday

You say BABY PINK
I say BLOOD RED
You say HANNAH MONTANA
I say THE GAZETTE
You say ZAC EFRON
I say EDWARD CULLEN
You say ROCK
I say RAP
You say Im WEIRD
I say YES I AM

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, Insane Winged Girl, Faxness-Fan48, libaka, Mrs Amanda Lupin, Hakaishi Uchiha, Usagi323, deideiblueeyez, Sakura Gekkani, DeixYunalover, cup o noodle, EvilIAm, Mrs.Michaela Cullen

IF YOUR LIFE WERE A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.

Opening Credits: Man or Muppet by Jason Segel & Walter

Waking Up: Mean by P!nk

First Day At School: Sad by Maroon 5

Making Your New Best Friend: Whip My Hair by Willow Smith

Falling In Love: You Found Me by The Fray

Breaking Up: White Horse by Taylor Swift

Prom: Dirty Picture by Taio Cruz ft. Ke$ha

Graduation: The Best Day by Taylor Swift

Life's Okay: It's All Your Fault by P!nk

Death of a Close Friend: The Resolution by Jack's Mannequin

Mental Breakdown: Lost In Stereo by All Time Low

Flashback: Church by T-Pain ft. Teddi Verseti

Getting Back Together: Wearing My Rolex by Wiley

Birth of Child: Good Girl by Carrie Underwood

Wedding Scene: Perfect Day by Lady Antebellum

Car Accident: I Gotta Feeling by Black Eyed Peas

Final Battle: Kiss Kiss by Chris Brown ft. T-Pain

Death Scene: I Shot The Sheriff by Bob Marley ft. The Wailers

Funeral Song: Big Night by Big Time Rush

End Credits: Sparks Fly by Taylor Swift

Deleted Scenes: DJ Got Us Falling In Love Again by Usher

a black man walks into A bar, a white man inside says:
"No coloured people in here"
The black man says, "When I'm born, I'm black when I grow up, I'm black, when I'm ill, I'm black when I'm in the sun, I'm black when I'm cold, I'm black when I'm dead, I'm black. When your born, your pink, when you're growing up, you're white when you're ill, you're green when you're in the sun, you're red when you're cold, you're blue when you're dead, you're purple, now tell me you're not coloured!"
If you want to abolish racism, copy and paste this onto your profile!

Good Friend, Best Friend

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you.
A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall.
A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

A good friend helps you find your prince.
A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
A best friend already has a shovel ready to bury the loser who made you cry.

A good friend will offer you a soda.
A best friend will dump theirs on you.

A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.

A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain.
A best friend takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!"

A good friend will help you move.
A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail.
A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

A good friend has never seen you cry.
A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried...just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore.

A good friend asks you to write down your number.
A best friend has you on speed dial.

A good friend never ask for anything to eat or drink.
A best friend helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

A good friend call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandma, by Grandpa.
A best friend call your parents DAD and MOM and GRAMS, GRAMPS!.

A good friend borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
A best friend loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

A good friend would knock on your front door.
A best friend walks right in and say "I'M HOME."

A good friend you have to tell them not to tell anyone.
A best friend already know not to tell.

A good friend is only through school/college.
A best friend is for life.

A good friend will help you when you're lost
A best friend will be giving you bad directions and screwing with your compass

A good friend will go with you to a concert
A best friend will be helping you kidnap the band

A good friend will hide you from the cops
A best friend are probably the reason they are after you

A good friend will buy you a pregnancy test
A best friend will be standing outside the bathroom door screaming, "Name it after me!"

A good friend will pick you up when you fall down
A best friend will pick you up, then trip you again

A good friend will borrow your stuff for a few days then return it
A best friend have had your stuff for so long they've forgotten it's yours

A good friend will leave when they feel insulted
A best friend will forgive you even if you don't know what you said wrong

A good friend will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough
A best friend will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Girl, drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste that kind of shit!"

A good friend will be crying at your funeral
A best friend will be sitting in jail for killing the guy who murdered you

A good friend will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
A best friend will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

A good friend knows a few things about you.
A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story.

A good friend tells you she knows how you feel.
A best friend just sits down and cries.

A good friend would ignore this letter
A best friend will repost this crap!

THE ALICE CULLEN POEM:

Dont mess with a Cullen, Especially me. I know whats a coming, Its no mystery.

My blood runs cold, My eyes are golden brown. Im what you call immortal My skills are world renown.

Im small, Im short, Im really good at sport.

Im sweet, Im kind, And jasper is all mine.

I sparkle like a diamond, When Im in the sun. I drive Italian sports cars, Being a vamp's so much fun

You ought to meet my family, Theres no need to fear. Instead of sucken humans, We would prefer a deer.

Were not among the living, So we dont need to sleep. So, hey, let's throw a party, And come in Emmetts jeep.

I think a storm is brewing, And Edward's really keen. To throw around a baseball, Come and join the team.

Rose is really gorgeous, But her temper's really bad. But you'll love Carlisle and Esme, My vampire Mum and Dad.

The best thing I saw coming, My sister Bella Swan. They went to Isle Esme, And now Nessie is born.

One thing we put up with, For Nessie's salvation. Is Jake's stinky wolf pack, Living on the reservation.

Oh, yea, I see the future, The world is set on fire. And everyones talking, About the author Stephenie Meyer.

I'll stαч up tιll TШILIGHT
To sєє thє NΣW MOON
And ιf I'm luckч
I'll sєє thє ΣCLIPSΣ
At BЯΣΛKING DΛWN
And thє wholє tιmє
I'm sιttιng with чou
Undєr thє MIDNIGHT SUN

Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't.

this is this cat
this is is cat
this is how cat
this is to cat
this is keep cat
this is a cat
this is retard cat
this is busy cat
this is for cat
this is forty cat
this is seconds cat

Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I bet you can't resist passing it on.

10 BEST THINGS ABOUT BEING A GIRL

10. We can wear guy clothes, but if they wear ours they get funny looks

9. At least one girl always survives in horror movies

8. We can put cotton between our toes and paint our nails without feeling the least bit silly

7. Our magazines have horiscopes

6. Girls with guy first names like Taylor sound cool, but it doesn't work the other way around

5. Our friends don't say "hi" by punching us in the arm

4. Yes PMS sucks, but at least we have an excuse to lay around eating chocolate once a month

3. Make-up covers any imperfections we may have

2. If we flirt with a cop, we can get out of a speeding ticket

1. Girl Talk... you know, the way we all just understand each other without having to explain a thing

Twilight A-Z!!

A is for Awesome Alice

B is for Beautiful Vampires

C is for Chief Swan

D is for Dr. Cullen

E is for Extreme, Vampire Baseball

F is for Forks (Duh)

G is for Grizzly Emmett

H is for Huge Werewolves

I is for, Isabella Marie Swan (Edward's World)

J is for Jasper

K is for Kicking James Across The Damn Room

L is for The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb

M is for Mother Of The House, Esme

N is for Never Piss Of A Mythical Creature (They bite or phase naked in front of you)

O is for Oops, Paper Cut In Front Of Hungry Jasper

P is for Perfect Edward

Q is for Quil, Jacob's Best Friend!

R is for Renesmée

S is for, Stupid Lamb (Let's face it Bella isn't the brightest bulb)

T is for Terrible Liar

U is for Um um (That's the Language you speak when you talk to a sexy vampire)

V is for Virgo

W is for World for Bella without danger is like telling a fish to get the hell out of the water

X is for X-Vampire Boyfriend

Y is for Yellow Porsche

Z is for Vampires Can't Catch Z's

NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast
TWILIGHT FANS: would rather rely on Alice for future predictions

NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!
TWILIGHT FANS: say OH MY EDWARD!! (OME)

NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings
TWILIGHT FANS: know that Jasper already can sense their feelings without saying a word

NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you!
TWILIGHT FANS: say shut up or I'll get James to kill you

NORMAL PEOPLE: think that vampires are all like Dracula
TWILIGHT FANS: know A LOT better and absolutely love the Cullen vampires

NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!
TWILIGHT FANS: when being during thunderstorms
TWILIGHT FANS: know that the Cullen's chased yell EDWARD SAVE ME!!

NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms
TWILIGHT FANS: know that the Cullen's might be playing baseball somewhere and Emmett was just at bat ; )

NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation
TWILIGHT FANS: would go directly to FORKS WASHINGTON

NORMAL PEOPLE: don't have this on there profile
TWILIGHT FANS: MUST have this on there profile!

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball. Copy and paste this into your profile.

Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

Bella Swan: Danger Magnet since 1987

The Beginning of a New Life:

Bella’s dress in Chapter 7- http:///prom-dresses-pr033.html

Kidnapped for Love:

Bella's favourite clothes - Chapter 5 - http:///bellas_favourite_clothes/set?id=74551989

Bella's outfit - Chapter 9 - http:///cgi/set?id=76069139