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![]() Author has written 33 stories for Harry Potter, Falling Skies, Hunger Games, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Study series, Glass series, Wicked, Looking For Alaska, John Green, Les Miserables, To Kill a Mockingbird, Kuroshitsuji, and Twilight. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I KNOW I HAVEN'T UPDATED MY PROFILE SINCE THE STONE AGE. Hai there. For those of you who don't know me, look at my username. Yes? This is how you should address me. If this is too long, you may call me Natalie, Destroyer of Souls and Devourer of Food (this isn't really related, but who knew that "devourer" wasn't a word? D:), or simply Natalie. I expect that you would like to know some things about me. Commonly asked questions include: Hi. That's not a question. You're pretty. I know. Where do you live? Somewhere over the rainbow. What shoe size are you? How is that relevant? Do you have a foot fetish? If so, then I suggest that you switch your fetish of choice to something else, like Asian girls or something a bit more normal. What's you favorite color? The color of food. Can I stroke your hair? Yes. Do you have any pets? I have a friend who goes by the user ExceedinglyPeculiarChick. Other than her, no. What's your favorite food? Food. Do you have any friends? I have plenty, thank you very much. What fandoms do you belong to? TOO MANY TO COUNT, SISTAH. TOO MANY TO COUNT. How smart are you? Very smart. In fact, I can take apart a toaster. Other than that, yes, I am actually quite intelligent. What do you do in your free time? I'm a fangirl by profession. WHAT DO YOU FRIGGIN' THINK I DO? Where were you born? Neptune. True story. Are you human? No. Well, then, what are you? Not human, that's for sure. You're very frustrating. Yes, it's one of my best traits. Well, goodbye. Yes. You should leave.
You a crackfic kind of person? Check out my cuz, DahliaValley. She's... um... interesting. This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Want me to review your stories? Just ask! And I'll always welcome another friend on FanFiction. Ah, friends. You can never have too many of those, especially when you have as many enemies as I do! :D BEYOND THIS POINT LIE STORIES OF IMMENSE FEELS AND STUFF. Ye be warned. Now why don't you go down to the little list below this here profile and read some of my lovely stories. :D -Natalie |