Greetings, I am The Mad Matchmaker, I am a major fan of anime such as Soul Eater, Fairy Tail, and FL-CL. I know that there are many users out there who would give boring anecdotes about themselves, but all I have to say is that I don't care what happened in the past, its what happens in the future that matters the most to people. And as a contradiction to my previous statement, I don't worry about the future, and I don't care about my past, all that matters to me is what's happening right now. As you can see from some of the stories I've read, I have a distinct interest in romance or ero stories.

To avoid confusion with my new pen name, Nidhogg (Pronounced NEED-hog and translates to "Malice Striker") is a Norse mythological entity who sat within the roots of the world tree Yggdrasil, often depicted as a black dragon who would eat the damned corpses of the inhabitants of Nastrond, those who were guilty of murder, adultery, and oath-breaking. Three of the most heinous crimes to the Norse people.

my favorite couples in anime are:

MakaxSoul

Black*StarxTsubaki

Death the kidxLiz

BlairxMizune(HOTNESS)

FreexEruka

NatsuxLucy

GajeelxLevy

ErzaxJellal

CobraxKinana

ZerefxMavis

MiraxFreed

With Blood and Rage of Crimson Red,

Ripped from a Corpse, so Freshly Dead,

Together with our Hellish Hate,

We'll Burn you ALL, That is Your Fate.

If you know which Lantern Corps. this belongs to, then good for you.

You say Martians. We say Irkens.

You say Bill Nye. We say Professor Membrane.

You say backpack. We say PAK.

You say uprising. We say RESISTY!

You say stupid. We say 'advanced'.

You say idiot. We say pathetic, filthy human pig-smelly!

You say ugly. We say big head.

You say 'The Song that Never Ends'. We say "The Doom Song".

You say robot. We say GIR.

You say "That's not true!" We say "LIIIIIIEEEES!!!"

You say aliens. We say "ZIM IS AN ALIEN! WHY DO I EVEN HAVE TO TRY AND PROVE IT THIS MUCH?!? JUST LOOK AT HIM!"

You say "I'm popular". We say "I'M NORMAL!!!!!"

You say we're weird. We say we're Invader Zim fans.

If you luv Invader Zim, copy and paste this onto your profile!

This is this cat.
This is is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat.
This is seconds cat. Now read the 3rd word of each sentence.

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's tasteless, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.

20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.

21) I am not authorised to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full."

25) I am not allowed to lock Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy in a closet to see who will come out alive

26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

28) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bees."

29) I will not tell Draco to “Make like a ferret and bounce”

30) It is exceptionally tasteless to tell Professor Lupin ‘Once you go black you never go back’

31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

33) I will not greet Professor McGonagall with “What’s new pussy cat?”

34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion.

35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends."

36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends."

37) I will not start singing and dancing in the middle of lessons and claim someone put the imperious cure on me.

38) I will not tell Ron and Hermione to ‘get a room’ whenever they start fighting

39) I will not tell Severus Snape he takes himself too seriously. Same applied for Minerva McGonagall.

40) Ravenclaws do not find a sign saying the library is closed for an indefinite time period funny in any sense. Nor does Hermione Granger.

41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.

42) I do not have a Dalek Patronus.

43) I will not lick Trevor.

44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey."

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.

46) I will not refer to Lucius Malfoy as a pimp - even if he does carry a pimp cane

47) I am no longer allowed to use the words ‘pimp cane’ in front of Draco Malfoy

48) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.

51) I will not tell the first years to build a treehouse in the Whomping Willow.

52) I will not tell Filch that Peeves has left. It is cruel to get his hopes up like that.

53) I am not allowed to skip through the hallways singing the "Wizards of Waverly Place" theme song.

54) I am not allowed to attack the new Head Boy with water ballons.

55) I am not allowed to change the Slytherin common room to red and gold.

56) I am not allowed to tell the Ravenclaws and/or Hermione Granger that the libray has been closed down.

57) I am not allowed to tell Lockheart that his fanclub is waiting in the Whomping Willow.

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we really messed up … but that sure was fun!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.
FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this.
REAL FRIENDS: Will repost

-when Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because I mean really? who likes lemons?

-when Life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.

-when Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.

-when Life gives you lemons, burn Life's house down.

-smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to

- therapy is expensive. popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide

A white man said,
"Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir. When you are born you're PINK When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away..

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet,
And so are you,
But the roses are wilting,
The violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty,
And so is your head.

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people

Amatures built the ark. Profssionals built the titanic...

You're a great friend...but if the zombies come i'm tripping you.