YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself.

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else.

After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow, this stuff is great for sugar highs..."

You live off of sugar and caffine

People think you're insane.

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week one week, and then dissappear off the face of the earth the next.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start laughing for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

If you are reading this I must state again how much I hate chain letters, unless it comes with a wish that will come true.

:Your One and Only Wish Do it one by one, don't look ahead!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

If so, scroll down

(don't cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you

love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are

down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to

blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you

fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but

the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life

changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your

soulmate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time

but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do

anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose... California: You like adventure. Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose... Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved. Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!

WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'In.'

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their coffee addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write 'For smuggling diamonds.'

7. Finish all your sentences with 'In accordance with the prophecy.'

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is 'To go.'

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask 'Why don't the poems rhyme?'

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your co-workers address your by your wrestling name.

17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream 'I won!! I won!!'

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling 'Run for your lives, they're loose!'

19. Tell your children (or someone) over dinner, 'Due to the economy, we're going to have to let one of you go.'

20. Whenever you can't think of anything else to say, grin widely, bug out your eyes and say 'I have Pez.'

21. When in a crowded elevator, fake hacking and coughing. Then count how many people get off on the very next stop.

22. Run into a building full of people and ask out loud 'What year is it?' When someone tells you the correct year you leave screaming 'It worked! It worked!'

23. Wear a shirt printed with the letters 'life' and pass out lemons.

Sorry about this chain letter. I caught it when I checked up someone's profile.

This is really sweet...

When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind.

When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around.

When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all.

When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.

When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever.

When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered.

When a girl says "I love you." she means it.

When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that.

Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person.

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him.

The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,

Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.

The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him.

The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her.".

If you read this, you have to repost it, guy or girl, or you will have bad luck for the rest of your life.

If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you.

Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you.

Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere.

So get ready for the biggest shock of your life.

If you don't repost this, you will be cursed with relationship problems for all of eternity.

Repost this to your profile, and spare yourself the emotional stress.

Again I must say how much I hate chain letters, but this one I say "Better safe than sorry."

A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground while she was still alive. The murderer chanted "Toma sota balcu." Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia.

Unity by Operation Ivy:

There’s a war going down between my brothers tonight

I don’t want no war going down, going down tonight

Stop this war

Stop this war

Civilization ha I call it as I see it

I call it bullshit you know I still cannot believe it

Our evolution now has gone the way of hate

A world evolved resolved into this stupid fate

Stop this war

Stop this war

All so different yeah I say were all the same

All caught you know in the division game

Self destruction fast impending like a bullet

No one can stop it once its fired no one can control it

Stop this war.

Stop this war.

A final word, wait it's not a call to action

We aint no sect, no this aint no fucking faction

Unity unity unity you've heard it all before

This time it’s not exclusive we want to stop a war

Stop this war.

Stop this war

Ain't nothin wrong, with another unity song

Ain't nothin wrong.

Ain't nothin wrong.

Ain't nothin wrong.

Ain't nothin wrong.

With a unity song!

Stop this war.

Stop this war.

Unity as one stand together

Unity evolutions gonna come.

Unity evolutions gonna come.

Unity evolutions gonna come.

Unity evolutions gonna come.