Let me just start by saying that I am not the best writer in the world by any stretch of the imagination. I don't actually know how good I am at writing, which is why I joined this site. I've been writing for approximately 14 years, if anyone is curious. I am 21 as of the 10th May 2014, (OH GOD I'M AN ADULT HELP), and I recently graduated from Glyndwr University...somehow. I studied Games Design, so its safe to say pretty much all my stories will be about games. I am a big games buff, and dislike anyone who says games make you a serial killer or whatever. I am also somewhat of a hipster, as I detest most FPSes (Bioshock and Timesplitters are exempt from this rule), all sports games, all racing games, and just dislike mainstream games in general. I tend to stick to RPGs, games with good stories, and lesser known games that few people have heard of. I also swear a lot. A LOT. I'm also insane, in that I think about random things all the time, am enamoured with violence (Which is why all my stories will be very bloody and very violent. No exceptions.), and have a very, very high threshold for violence, disturbing shit and anything that could offend somebody in any way, shape or form. Seriously, no media can offend me. That is my superpower. In addition to these characteristics, I dislike many, many, many things. A list of my pet hates takes up roughly 80% of this page. The other 20% is pointless bullshit.

IMPORTANT NOTE: My update schedule is shit. Very, very shit. Like, the worst, most runny, smelliest shit you can possibly imagine. I am sorry for this, but my update schedule is hampered by the fact that inspiration likes to leave at random times, and come back stupidly late at night with her panties round her ankles and stinking of aftershave worn by strange men. I cannot control her, so I have to wait for her to cooperate before I can write. This can take anywhere between a week and a month. I know all too well the hell of reading through a story you love, then waiting AGES for updates, and I am truly sorry. I try and make up for this by making every chapter as good as it possibly can be.

Now, some info about me:

Gender: Male.

Favourite Colour: Red (Duh, it's in my fucking name).

Favourite Author: Was Stephen King, but for now I'm unsure.

Favourite Genres: Action, adventure, comedy, horror (These are probably the only genres I'll write. I may dabble in romance, but having never experienced romance myself, it's likely I'll be shit at it.)

Favourite Books: Alex Rider Series (Anthony Horowitz), Power of 5 Series (Anthony Horowitz again), Cell (Stephen King), It (Stephen King again, and probably my favourite book ever), and the Skullduggery Pleasant Series (Derek Landy). Besides that, I like most things from these three authors.

Favourite Games: Dragon Age, Fable 1 (Best of the series) Fallout 3 and New Vegas, Saints Row, Hitman, Mass Effect, Sonic Adventure 1 and 2 (Mostly nostalgia) and the old Crash Bandicoot games on PS1 (Also nostalgia), Dark Souls, Pokemon, Persona series (4 is my fave).

Favourite Films: Dodgeball, Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, Airplane, Johnny English, the Transporter Series, Men in Black 1 and 2, and the South Park Movie.

Favourite TV: The Simpsons, American Dad, South Park, Futurama (So most cartoons), Spartacus Blood and Sand, Wharehouse 13, Deadliest Warrior, Doctor Who, Game of Thrones, Burn Notice, and The IT Crowd.

Favourite Comics: I don't actually own any comics since there's no comic shops near where I live, but I am a fairly big Marvel buff (Sorry DC fans). I also like Preacher, even though I haven't read much of it, and V for Vendetta.

Favourite Web Comics: Homestuck, Gunnerkrigg Court, Chimneyspeak, Misfile.

Favourite Anime: Highschool DXD, Tengen Toppen Gurren Lagann, Sword Art Online, Angel Beats, Kill La Kill, No Game No Life.

Favourite Music: Errr...well...huh...that's a tough one. My music tastes are kind of...weird. Well...'varied' is probably a better word. Rock, metal, classical, rap, a ccapella, jazz, techno; basically, I like a lot of genres, as long as the song is good. One genre I won't touch with a ten foot pole though is Pop. No. Just...no. Get that away from me. I actually usually just stick to game music, i.e. music from game soundtracks, and stay away from specific bands and musicians. Like I said, weird.

Things I Like: Games, TV, Reading, Writing, swearing, the Internet, food, being lazy, day dreaming, quoting obscure pieces of media that only I have experienced, violent media, TV Tropes, searching for random crap on the Internet, peace and quiet, random humour, being British, nerd culture in general.

Pet Hates: (Oh wow...where do I start?) First person shooters, sports games, pop music, buses, the government, politics and politicians (They're all evil, and see you as walking money despositors. The end.), EVERYTHING being expensive, bad spelling/grammar, exerting myself, exercise, the crappy education system (I learnt the majority of what I know from games, books and TV, not from teachers), 'cool' people (By which I mean those people who are popular, have loads of friends, like sports and have six packs, but have the IQ of bricks and the personality of a bucket of shit), stupid people in general, those who thinks good graphics make good games (They don't), Call...of...FUCKING...Duty (The next person who says it's the most popular franchise ever will get my foot put so far up their ass that they'll cough up toenails), people who call themselves 'gamers' but only play COD and other FPSes, dull shooters with grey/brown colour palettes and no story or actual depth, people who spam cheap moves/combos on fighting games, selfish people, bus drivers (They look at you like you just committed a murder or something), people who skip through all cutscenes/text/coversations on games, people who don't think playing games is a legitimate pastime, people who love to go on about how they beat that boss you were stuck on in 3 seconds at full health with the worst weapon in the game on the hardest difficulty or some other bullshit, racists, sexists (Any 'ists' in general really), organized religion (I'm not an athiest, I'm agnostic, I just don't like the big religous groups that tell you how to live your life and order you to cruficy anyone who doesn't think the same as you), closed minded people (So...stupid people again), overbearing parents (You spent your money on something you like? HOW FUCKING DARE YOU?!), bullies (If you bully someone else, you should find the nearest blunt object, and apply it to your testicles until your voice turns high pitched), people who don't like retro games for extremely petty reasons (It hasn't got extremely high def modern graphics? Fuck off!), American spellings (I have nothing against Americans, but can't we just spell the word one way and leave it at that?), being ostracised for being different (Would you prefer everyone is exactly the same?), people who comment on a story or video and point out that a certain cool thing that happened is impossible for X reason/people who point out pointless little flaws in a piece of media and go on and on about how it ruins the experience for them (http:///pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MST3KMantra), modern cinema (50% of it is utter shite, 45% of it is reboots or retreads of previous ideas, and 5% of it is good films that nobody will ever go to see), any youth subculture that involves wearing hoodies and hanging out on street corners looking menacing before spouting out some indecipherable gibberish and mugging someone, people that que up all night to buy the next Call of Duty (WHY? It'll be exactly the same as the last one!), people who hate a piece of media because there's not enough action in it, 'gamers' who can't go five minutes without killing something in a game (Establish the story? Talk to NPCs? FUCK THAT, I WANT TO FUCKING KILL SOMETHING!), film reviewers (They take it WAY too seriously, and it seems that whatever films I like get incredibly low reviews.), upper class twits who dislike something because it's 'vulgar' or 'obscene' and can't just unwind and enjoy themselves like normal people, people who crusade to get a game/film off the market because it's too violent or contains precisely 3 seconds of sex where you can't even see anything (You want to know why Bioware won't put sex scenes in their games anymore? Check out the Mass Effect 1 debacle), Deal Or No Deal (More details in the 'Celebrity Nemesis' section) and...hmm...is that everything? Let me think...oh wait...there is something else I hate: FUCKING...FOOTBALL. (Rant begins here) Seriously, it's one of my main pet hates. Apparently it's 'the beautiful game', the best thing in the world, and if you're male you have to enjoy it. That's interesting, because all I see is some thick headed, imbecilic, jackasses in shorts kicking a ball around for two hours, to the cheers of thousands of other thick headed, imbelic jackasses in shorts, and their sons who will grow up to be thick headed, imbecilic jackasses too. The sport is boring and uninteresting, yet is the most popular thing in the world. Grown men (With the brains of children), are paid obscene amounts of money (Money that could be going to worthwhile causes) to kick a fucking ball around for two hours and entertain a bunch of retards. WHY IS THIS POPULAR? I...I just don't understand it. It makes no logical sense to me how someone can possibly enjoy this pointless tripe. Anyone who can honestly say they like football, should go to the nearest hospital, and have a doctor look at their brain. This may be difficult however, because if you like football, either: A) Your brain is too small for the X ray to properly make out, or B) You have received a lobotomy in the past without your knowledge. (DISCLAIMER: You are free to enjoy whatever pastime you like, and none of this rant is intended to be offensive towards football fans; if you enjoy something, that's fine, don't let my utter rage stop you from enjoying your pastime. Also, if you disagree with any of my pet hates, or if some of my pet hates contradict each other, I apologise. Please send your complaints directly to my ass, where they will be dealt with in an appropriate manner.)

What I like in a story: Interesting characters, violence, twists and turns, character development, and to a lesser extent, humour and MAYBE romance if it's done well.

What I don't like in a story: Characters that don't grab my interest, bad spelling and grammar, tense errors (Flicking between present and past tense etc.), lack of character development.

My life philosophy: Yeah, I have one of those. Holy Shit. Basically, I believe that the whole point of life is to enjoy yourself, and if you're not having fun, you're not doing it right. I think that happiness is the most important thing in life, and it should take precidence. On that same note, I also value freedom very highly, as it allows people to make their own choices and so pursue their own happiness. Violations of freedom don't sit right with me. At all. I'm a very liberal person, in that I think people should try to enjoy themselves as much as possible; you won't be around forever, so have fun while you're here. In my opinion, anything is okay to do as long as it makes you happy, and doesn't hurt you or others. I try to be tolerant whenever possible; I'm fine with religion as long as it isn't forced on people, I'm fine with homosexuality as long as it makes people happy, differences in race mean literally nothing to me etc. I'm very against censorship as a whole...except for when people swear in TV shows and there's a beeping sound...that can be funny. Also, if somebody negatively affects the lifetime happiness of others, they are an arsehole, are no longer justified in feeling happiness, and should be brought down. Painfully. Oh yeah...and I may approve of the death penalty. Not sure, haven't given it that much thought. If I did approve of it though, I'd only have it used on irredeemable scumbags who are just taking up space and should be put out of everybody's misery (Serial murderers, rapists etc). I'm also not a very politcal person, as I believe all politicians to be evil and/or idiots (See my 'Pet Hates' section for more details), so I don't swear allegiance to any party, stay out of political disputes, don't vote, and laugh when politicians make the news for being corrupt or hiring a professional assassin to kill their wife or something.

Projects: I'm currently working on three projects: The Girl with the Blood Red Hair, Dunwich, and Murder at Summitmist Manor. Dunwich and Summitmist are both side projects, and are currently on a (Possibly indefinite) hiatus. The Girl with the Blood Red Hair is my main project at the moment, and a story I'm very, very proud of (Not particularly proud of the title, but that was never my strong suit). In addition to these, I have a few other projects in the planning stages, but it's uncertain if any of them will ever see the light of day. If they do, it won't be until The Girl with the Blood Red Hair is finished, which probably won't be for a while yet. I'm planning to do both a sequel and a prequel for Blood Red Hair, but not until the original story's ended.